animemental

[animemental]

It’s moving time, baby

This a my new blog: https://kokorotherapist.wordpress.com/

That’s right. I’m making a blog. It’ll be dedicated to anime and mental health but I hope to consistently post on it more than here. I’ll have normal blog posts about anime, manga and webtoons that will connect with mental health - keep up with the theme and my knowledge base. But I’ll be adding a couple things:

1. Workouts - anime themed for a healthy body to go along with that healthy mind

2. Information - like actual info for those who need it

3. Other little fun things

Now, this is a one woman show, so I can’t go crazy on this blog. My plan it to build it up and make it robust but be patient with me. It’s a work in progress. 

Anyways, check it out if you want or send it along to someone you think would be interested. I would really appreciate it! <3

[animemental]

A Drive Like No Other

https://healthyotaku.wordpress.com/

Crazy Criminals: A Touch of Relatability

Ever feeling like you could join a criminal group and be fine? Yeah… me neither…

When I first clicked on the ‘Watch Now’ button on Funimation for this anime, I didn’t expect too much. It sounded cool, pretty original and looked aesthetically pleasing. Bright colors entice me.

What I got was a diverse cast of characters and immediate action. The first episode had my hooked from the moment Ordinary Person made an ordinary appearance in an unordinary city. It seems futuristic and, after finally reading the synopsis, it confirmed the setting as a dystopian future. Set in Kansai, which became a vassal state of Kantō (Wikipedia), the city runs rampant with criminals called Akudama. Ordinary Person gets roped into a mysterious, action-packed heist with five criminals who appear to collect a big payday at the Kansai Police Headquarters. There are some twists right off the bat and it was pretty entertaining watching this poor civilian have to lie her way to safety. Or, what she thought would be safety.

Want to read the rest of my thoughts?? Check it out on my new blog!

https://healthyotaku.wordpress.com/

[animemental]

Workouts for anime and fitness lovers

Almighty Workout #1 – Beginner to Intermediate

Our favorite hero Deku workouts out like a champ. To be fair, he kind of has to in order to get that sick power All Might keeps telling him about! So, let’s work as hard as Deku and get fit for our inner power.

Check out the entire workout on my new blog dedicated to all things anime, manga, Webtoon and more! 

Blog: healthyotaku.wordpress.com

[animemental]

The Best Demon Ever Created

He's a genius, foxy guy with a lot of emotional turmoil. His surname is Yoko Kurama from when he was still a high rank demon living as a bandit in the demon world. After his demise, Yoko sends his soul flying to the human world and takes over the body of a baby boy named Shuichi Minamino. This the red-haired version of him that lives with his mother, goes to school and does normal human stuff. Although Yoko retains his memories and personality, Kurama has stated that he is both demon and human, both Yoko and Shuichi. I put him as first mainly because of my bias, but I truly think this character is well-designed, complex and unique plant-based abilities that set him aside from the pack. 

Want to see the full rank? Check out my blog: 

https://healthyotaku.wordpress.com/

[animemental]

I started a blog...

So, I started an official blog so I could have more options to post. I will add the link and hopefully ya’ll like it! It is brand new, so keep in mind that it may not be filled with tons of stuff just yet. I am working on it! If you are interested in anime, Webtoons and manga, head on over and check it out. 

https://healthyotaku.wordpress.com/

[animemental]

Demon Slayer on Emotions

Hello all! Welcome to a series of posts dedicated to a beautiful, unique and enticing anime called Demon Slayer. 

Let me start by saying that this anime gave me too many feels, too quickly. I have been slowly adding onto what I hope is a full sleeve of tattoos dedicated to anime that mean the world to me. My next piece is dedicated to Demon Slayer and I cannot wait to rep this show permanently. This show captured my heart and stole my emotions faster than Zenitsu’s First Form: Thunderclap and Flash. 

There are several topics I want to discuss with this series and hopefully, am able to incorporate them into a mental health lens in a concise manner. Stay with me if I tangent. 

First up: Tanjiro’s exuberance. This character is an eye catcher from the get-go. His character design is captivating. It makes you want to know more about him; what is that scar about, does the red hair symbolizes anything, where do the hanafuda earrings come from, do his eyes man anything in terms of power? I had enough questions to fill a lake. The anime kept some of them hidden while revealing some within the first few episodes. By the end of the first episode, I was hooked into the DS world and Tanjiro’s plight to help his sister. It evoked the same emotions in me that Inuyasha did the first time I saw it. I saw characters trying to survive in a cruel world and forced to go on a journey with no guarantee that everything would be okay. I remember fearing that I would lose my family to death when I was younger. It was a short phase, but I had sleepless nights filled with silent tears as I worried about the inevitable deaths of my parents. I think I had watched something that introduced death at an early age and I could not get it out of my head. When watching Inuyasha, that part of me that feared death started to understand that life can move on once someone is lost. 

When I first watched DS, I was in graduate school desperately getting through a tough semester. I almost dropped out because I had convinced myself that I was not supposed to be there and that my family was falling apart. Tanjiro was the opposite. He had this great family who seemed all put together and their love was boundless. His exuberance for life and optimism was contagious in a time where I couldn’t see anything other than failure. Although it is a fictional world with fictional characters and fictional creatures, it struck me how determined Tanjiro is the entire series to maintain a positive and optimistic outlook so that he continues towards his goals. 

The call to adventure is not original. In this anime though, the character’s reactions and the artwork pull you into the trauma, fear and deep sadness, as well as determination to keep on living. It makes you want to cheer for him, his family and for yourself. 

I will end the post here so that it does not become too long. I have many other topics to cover, so the next one will be a bit longer. I really want to give this anime the attention it deserves. 

Stay tuned!

[animemental]

Inuyasha Please: Part 3

Here it is! My thoughts on Kagome. Please see my previous posts if you want to know why I am writing about characters from Inuyasha. 

What I think Kagome is struggling with is some sort of depression. I am not just referring to the most well-known type: MDD or Major Depressive Disorder. I do not think she has had a depressive episode in the entire series, so not that fam. However, depression comes in many different forms and types of clinically specific disorders. Just to name a few:

Postpartum Depression

Seasonal Depression or Seasonal Affective Disorder

Persistent Depressive Disorder

Cyclothymic Disorder

Bi-Polar ll Disorder

Etc, etc. 

I feel that Kagome struggles with something called Unspecified Depressive Disorder. She has some symptoms that fall under depression, but not enough to be clinically significant. I would even say she has a lot of melancholy at times. My reasoning comes from her age and the situations she is forced to deal with. I cannot imagine that, if this stuff was real, a 14/15 year old would acclimate as quickly as she seemed to do. She has moments where she clearly misses home and her loved ones, but most of the series she appears happy with her companions and even chooses to stay in the Feudal World for Inuyasha. On top of the constant fighting for their life, many times she is compared to another person. Example that comes to mind are those moments where Kagome encourages Inuyasha to help Kikyo but then becomes obviously upset when she notices how they interact. Yes, most people might feel the same if their handsome, half-demon SO was staring lovingly into another person’s face, but still. It has to hit home for her that she is a reincarnation of this woman! The girl has a temper and often becomes angry at a lot of Inuyasha’s behavior, but remember this: It is easier to show anger than show sadness. It is less vulnerable to be angry than sad. Anger can get you what you want or help in the moment with keeping you physically and emotionally safe. 

Those are some of my thoughts about Kagome! Hopefully I did an okay job of keeping it objective. She is my least favorite character of any show. 

Onto the next! I keep be taking a tinyyyy break from Inuyasha to focus on a different series for a couple posts. I want to share my thoughts on Demon Slayer. This is because 1) I plan to get the next tattoo on my anime themed sleeve dedicated to Demon-Slayer and 2) I just have a lot of thoughts on the amazing show. Check back in this week if you are curious!

[animemental]

My first anime love: Inuyasha Part 3

Full disclosure: This post us half about grief and half about Kagome. I do not, I repeat, DO NOT, like Kagome. I don’t like her character, her overall vibe, her way of being, etc. I have an idea why, but that is not what this post is about so I’m going to keep it observational and focused on my opinions about mental health, as per usual. 

What we know about grief is largely based on observational data collected by psychologists over the years. The second part is what neuroscience has taught us about the awesomeness of the human brain and how all those chemicals work in tangent with each other. 

Psychoeducation Time my friends:

Grief is the response to loss, particularly to the loss of someone or some living thing that has died, to which a bond or affection was formed. This includes humans, pets or even objects depending on the relationship formed with it. Think of your favorite childhood blanket or some sort of toy that was given to you by a special person. Grief can affect different aspects of our humanity, such as emotional, cognitive, physicals, social, behavioral, and cultural dimensions of our lives. The most known fact of grief is that it is a process of response and it is felt in stages that fluctuate. Stages are: shock, denial, anger, bargaining, depression, testing and acceptance. I might do a post going into details about those but not right now. 

Inuyasha was going through, in my opinion, the third stage before he was shot by that damn arrow. When he wakes up, still in that stage, it takes him some time to move onto bargaining. He was quick to anger at most everything. As I stated in my last post, I do think he is naturally impulsive and aggressive with his expression, but the time between him understanding his loss and what his new life is like, he was angry about losing his love. Kagome became a fill in and I think he shows the stages of grief as he gets to know and understand her as separate from Kikyo. There was a lot of comparing, contrasting and sadness surrounding the realization that Kagome may be a reincarnation, but is not the exact same as Kikyo. When she finally dies in his arms towards the end of the series, I truly think Inuyasha entered the acceptance phase. No more was the dirt corpse of Kikyo forced to walk the Earth and could be at peace. 

See the next post for my thoughts on Kagome!

[animemental]

My first anime love: INUYASHA PT2

Here we go! Now, for clarification purpose: this is for fun and psychoeducation. The only part you should take seriously are the mental health facts, which will be clearly labeled. Everything else is silly stuff and ramblings. I would even say that most of the time, people won’t agree with my observations or thoughts on the shows or characters. My advice: scroll past if you don’t like it. 

This post will be about the characters Inuyasha and Kagome. Remember, I am not doing this for people to self-diagnose or diagnose others. Not every anime creators and manga artist is thinking about mental health when they create characters and assigning them disorders. So, my observations are pretty surface level unless there is something obviously trying to be portrayed within the plot or character development. Without further ado, let’s dive in!

When I think of Inuyasha, first thought is his awesome fighting prowess and blunt personality. I appreciate his aggressiveness because it fits the circumstance and his personality pretty well. However, you can also see that he can be sensitive and a big softie when he cares about you. When I thought about HIS impulse control, my immediate thoughts go exactly to that: the aggression. He is ready to fight at the tip of a hat, some times requiring his friends to hold him back. In the beginning, it felt like he did this often; always on the defensive, zero perspective-taking skills and hypervigilance. Understandable considering he had just woken up from being stuck to a tree AND not realizing the world had changed since he last opened his eyes. Also, just the whole world they are in requires some level of hypervigilance just to stay alive. Demons running amok and all. 

Now, psychoeducation time: Impulses are the sudden strong and unreflective urge or desire to act. Impulse-control issues fall into the category: Disruptive, Impulse-control and Conduct Disorders, harboring disorders such as Oppositional Defiant Disorder, Conduct Disorder, Intermittent Explosive Disorder, etc. They are determined by assessing age, developmental history, neurological alternatives and behavioral symptoms. Inuyasha does not fall under a specific one necessarily, but it does seem that he is pretty impulsive person and learns to think before acting in more situations as he gains friends along the series. To be fair, I am also not taking into account his childhood because there isn’t enough to compile evidence that he had low impulse control beyond the normal development of the brain.

I also think he struggles with verbal impulse control. Throughout the series, he says what is on his mind and hardly has a care for the harshness of his words. Albeit, most of them are actually helpful, encouraging or insightful statements said in a certain tone or in a way that make you have to think about the underlying meaning. This is not a bad thing, as I know several amazing people who have been called blunt, critical, harsh, etc. This comes from experience and learning to how respond to people as you develop, as well as environment and social interactions. Impulses are a really thing aspect of the human brain. It takes 20 seconds for an impulse to dissipate. Meaning, if you can hold out on that impulse for 20 seconds, after that it becomes easier not to act on it. I tell my clients to count to 20 in their head or out loud and then re-think about the impulse to see if they still want to do it. Or, to focus on something else entirely and most of the time, the impulse passed. It works great with kids and teens who are willing to try it. 

Last thing: impulses can be focused on many different things, so differentiating normal impulse control to abnormal patterns of low impulse control that is impairing daily functioning requires thorough assessment by a professional. 

Tune in to read about my thoughts on Inuyasha struggling with grief and what I think about Kagome in the next post!

[animemental]

My first anime love: INUYASHA

Throwing it wayyyy back! Inuyasha is the first anime I watched where something in my tiny brain clicked. I figured out what anime was and that I had been watching it since I was around 5 years old. No, my parents did not monitor what I watched and had no idea I was watching shows like Rurouni Kenshin, One Piece, Cowboy Bebop, etc. But then again, my Dad let us watch Lord of the Rings and Star Wars at a very young age, so I was pretty used to violence on a fantasy level. 

Inuyasha was a catalyst for my mental health, even as a middle schooler. At the time, I was trying to figure out friendships, love and family dynamics. 

One thing about Inuyasha that strikes me as interesting is all the hypocritical messages the plot and characters show, as well as how fun it is to make speculations on each character's mental state. I feel each character resembles a mental health illness, whether purposeful or not. I mean, Inuyasha flip flops between doppelgangers of his true love like a kid choosing between their favorite candy at the store. It seems to me that wants to have his cake and eat it too, choosing to lead both of those poor ladies on. But, then you see the obvious affection he has for both of them on different levels of love. It is cute, if not morbid when you realize Kikyo is made of actual dirt. Like, she is a dirt zombie. Doesn't stop our boy from trying to kiss that dirty mouth though;). **EDIT: Didn’t think I would have to add this in but just to be clear: the only serious thing about these posts are the mental health FACTS. Everything else is just my silly thoughts and ramblings. If you don’t agree or like my perspective of a character or show, please scroll past and pretend you never saw this. 

Here's my opinion:

Inuyasha - Impulse Control and Grief

Kagome - Unspecified Depressive Disorder

Sango - Depression and PTSD

Miroko -  Narcissistic Personality Disorder

Shippo - Generalized Anxiety 

And you best believe they all have trauma. For sure. 

Let's tackle my favorite character and reason why I even know what anime is:

INU-F*CKING-YASHA

If you do not know the cranky yet sweet, aggressive yet gentle, self-serving yet relationship-driven dog demon, you do not know anime. Period. (Jk but I recommend it to all anime lovers or anime explorers). 

I am focusing my Inuyasha series on types of disorders that I BELIEVE THE CHARACTERS PORTRAY OR may otherwise being struggling with. This is not a definitive list and by no means I am trying to diagnose for anything other than fun observations and to hopefully provide psychoeducation about mental health. Please do not try to compare yourself to the characters and symptoms: there is a lot of nuance that goes into diagnosing someone with mental health. So, I repeat: I discourage self-diagnoses and always encourage people to seek out professional mental health in the proper setting...not on the internet. 

[animemental]

FMA and Trauma Part 3

Hey everyone. I have two blogs: this one and one called pleasegivemescreativity. I made a mistake and accidently posted on the wrong one, so I am copying and pasting back onto Anime Mental. Sorry for the confusion. 

This is Part 3 of my Fullmetal Alchemist series of posts.

*CAUTION: THERE WILL BE SPOILERS.

I want to talk about trauma. Trauma sucks. It feels bad, it can have a ghastly affect on your overall well-being and it is downright unfair. Trauma does not discriminate and it does not pull any punches. I think Fullmetal Alchemist is riddled with trauma, as most anime characters have experienced some sort of life changing event. But, the underlying theme of it really makes FMA stand above the rest.

Quick psychology lesson:

Trauma is an emotional response to an event. It is what we feel after something adverse has happened to us. You can experience a traumatic event through different ways: it happens directly to you; you witness it in person or through a screen; you are told about it; or it can happen to someone you know and you find out after the fact, such as learning about a tornado and discovering your friend was injured a few days later when you go to visit.

There are Big Traumas and Little Traumas. Big T’s are life threatening and can cause PTSD, like a natural disaster, war, sexual violence. Little t’s are highly distressing to the individual but do not fall into Big T category such as bullying, loss, break-up of significant other, basically non-life threatening events. You can still experience PTSD from Little t’s, it is just more unlikely. Oftentimes, when you experience consistent trauma, such as abuse or neglect, that becomes Compounding trauma. It stacks up like pancakes and can lead to other mental health issues such as anxiety, depression, bi-polar, etc.

FMA has some pretty obvious Big T’s. When the Elrics lose their mother and witness the horrors of Transmutation gone wrong, that is a Big T like no other. For Ed, having to re-connect his nerves whenever he breaks his automail is a Little t. Al has the constant worry (until they realize the blood does not wash away anymore) about losing his soul through the blood washing away or getting messed up in his armor, which is a Little t. When our body experiences trauma, the brain attempts to help us by shutting down our feelings when we are re-traumatized. It tries to keep you safe by stopping the pain which looks like anxiety symptoms that avoid the triggers. On the other hand, our brains are not wired to deal quickly with intense stress and often have a hard time processing and handling it. This is where the symptoms like flashbacks, intrusive thoughts, nightmares, etc. come into play.

**Edit: Our brain is not naturally wired to deal with intense stress. It can learn to do it but humans are not born with our amygdala ready to take on sexual abuse as if it is an expected, normal thing to deal with. Just to clarify my earlier statement and give an example. Proceed.

Some moments of FMA I think about are the Elrics reactions to the Butcher. You can see him start to break down in absolute terror when he realizes how dangerous the situation is and how helpless he is in that moment to help himself and Winry. Another is when Edward wakes up after nightmares about what happened to Nina and Alexander. During the episode with The Butcher, Ed even mentions that he feels so weak because he can’t even protect a little girl. That’s some trauma right there.

A good example of a repressed memory is when viewers/readers discover Al has blocked out the memory of his soul being trapped inside the monster thing they created during their mother’s Transmutation. I think most of the characters live in a state of repression just to get through the day. So many have seen or personally suffered horrors that I am glad are mostly fiction. The anime/manga’s subtle hints at normal reactions to stress and sorrow is commendable and helped me relate to the characters more as I watched the show.

Trauma is no joke my friends. If you or anyone you know suffers from symptoms of trauma that I have named, do not hesitate to seek the help of a mental health professional. That is why we are here and studied psychology.

So, that concludes FMA for now. Moving along, I am caught between a throw back or a current love. With that being said, I will make a decision but will keep it a surprise! If you like these posts, find them helpful or thin someone would benefit from reading, please like, comment, share, and tag me! I love talking anime just as much as I love talking mental health.

Disclaimer: I am a trained, licensed mental health professional with a graduate degree and in the process of full state licensure. What I discuss is an accurate as I know and have been taught. I am not diagnosing anyone by sharing symptoms, nor am I promoting self-diagnosis. If you have symptoms that are concerning, seek out professional help so that you do not assume and can get the proper treatment for yourself. Adios!

[animemental]

FMA Forever Part 2

Welcome to Part 2 of FMA Forever. Let’s crack in and answer some burning questions from Part 1. 

1. Is there any other instances or aspects of the anime that you want to point out?

There is so much about FMA and FMA Brotherhood I could sit here and unpack. I will stick with significant parts and pieces, relationships and action shots. 

I think about Edward and Alphonse’s relationship a lot in regards to mental health. As you may know, Attachment is a hot topic in mental health. The concept of nature versus nurture has so much value in our everyday lives. Your experiences growing up really do affect how you approach stress, life transitions and relationship as you get older. 

Ed and Al are ripped from a nurturing environment thanks to illness and a shitty father. Their source of love and positivity died due to grief and illness, two uncontrollable things that no child should have to witness. They experience four significant traumas in childhood that I am shocked do not affect their attachments to others as much as it should. They have a parent leave unprompted, a parent die, failed transmutation where they witness a disgusting blob of flesh and organs MOVING and losing parts (and all) of their bodies. I cannot even fathom how that would mess up your brain. That is nightmare fuel folks. 

They do distance themselves from others quite often during the series, sticking together and keeping others at an arms length from their familial relationship. These two seem to think that they don’t deserve positive relationships because they are sinners, failures. They fight on, taking hit after hit and continue to go forward. I think the two of them end up compartmentalizing the terrible things that happen because their brains are constantly dealing to re-traumatizing events. If you pay attention, you will see where the brothers have those moments of intense, overwhelming feelings of being re-traumatized and then how one of them steps in to help the other through it. 

2. What is the beef with episode 7?

This will be short because this episode speaks for itself. I commend the creator of this beautiful series for thinking of the worst thing on the face of the planet. If you do not know what a chimera is, go brush up here: https://fma.fandom.com/wiki/Chimera. This episode shows you how low someone can stoop for fame and recognition. I would say Tucker had some psychosis happening when he created Nina-Alexander. He was clearly delusional and running on thoughts of grandeur. He is stuck in the past when he was successful for all the wrong reasons. Needless to say, watching this episode will make you think twice about each character in the series. 

3. Tell me more about how Ed discovers his inner spark.

This inner spark is the human ability to cope. It is something I have thought of every time I work with a client. Full disclosure, this is not a theory or something I pulled from a textbook; this is my own thought about how the brain works and how I visualize potential in people. 

In order to successfully cope with something, you need to be able to use a skill or strategy that helps your brain and body go back to a state of relative calm. You are able to tolerate something and make it out of the situation being able to continue on with your life eventually. Coping comes in all forms, some good, some bad, some in the grey area. When I think of this spark, it is in your brain and connects to your heart. The human heart is connected to our feelings more so than we think: heart feel like it is going to jump out of your chest when you are nervous? That is because the amygdala, an almond shaped part of your brain that is tied to emotions, says “Hey, DANGER.” Now your heart starts to beat really fast, alerting you that something is wrong and to go into flight, fight or freeze to protect yourself. I think the spark is somewhere near the amygdala, its own little piece. It lights up when your brain senses danger and its job to to convince you that you can handle this, you can cope with this stress. But, you need to be willing to use skills and be creative in order to cope with the danger. Once you use a skill to cope, your heart responds by slowing down. 

I believe Ed finds his spark when Scar almost destroys Al’s suit. The episode name is  The Ishbal Massacre, episode 15. When Ed sees the damage to Al’s suit, I think the spark goes off and for the brothers, their lives are truly worth something. Ed realizes how easily Al could disappear and there is virtually nothing he can do as Scar over powers them. When Ed scolds Al and he claps back with some words of his own, you see how desperate these boys really are and how far they are willing to go in order to be a family.

I have decided to keep Part 3 a mystery; no prepared questions. I hope you enjoyed these posts so far!

[animemental]

FMA Forever

Why Edward Elric changed my view on anime for mental health. 

Also, please share this post if you or anyone else finds it interesting, informative, helpful in any way. I love to write and other than a few books I have going on through Wattpad and drafts, this is a good way for me to get out some thoughts and connect to others!

Anyways, onwards to the good stuff!

Photo from: Fullmetal Alchemist Fandom -Wiki

So, here we are, four or five posts deep into the crevices of my brain. I have a new idea for formatting these posts so bare with me. Please. It will be my interpretation of an anime with some actual facts thrown in; thoughts on the series as a whole; answering the question/statement from subtitle or previous pose. 

Background of Anime:

Fullmetal Alchemist is a manga by Hiromu Arakawa, serialized in 2001-2010. It tells of two young brothers living in a steampunk world of alchemy in a fictional country called Amestris . They commit taboo, pay the ultimate price and set off to fix everything. Edward is the oldest and Alphonse is the younger brother. Their father is a lot to deal with and their mother is... well, I don’t want to spoil it for those who have not seen the series. Though trial and tribulation, these bros fight tooth and nail for what they believe in and meet fantastic characters along the way. Ultimate goal: Figure out how to reverse their punishment. 

Series As I View It:

When it comes to overall mental health, I would say that FMA was not the most helpful in regulating emotional stability. This series had me up and down, riding a rollercoaster of emotions. I came to the FMA a bit later than others, getting the chance to binge the whole thing versus waiting each week for a snippet of the story. From the get go, I was horrified and downright pissed at fate. These boys are just trying to do the right thing out of desperation and life did them dirty. Thankfully, my life at the time was pretty calm, so I didn’t have to add anything into the mix other than watching a good plot and intriguing characters. The idea of alchemy is so wonderful; having the ability to change matter into other matter. In the Elrics case, their world took it a step further and includes automail; metal limbs. This made Edward and Al’s struggle even more sad. But then you get swept away by the detailed fight scenes and you are screaming for them to kick ass with those metal limbs. Overall, the series was equal parts entertaining and frustrating. You want the underdogs to win, but the author made sure that reality catches up to the viewer pretty quickly. They cannot win every fight, save everyone person in distress or always make it in time. Just watch episode 7: Night of the Chimera’s Cry and you will truly know pain and heart ache. 

To Answer the Question:

Why did Edward change my view on mental health?

Guys and gals, this kid is thrown every shitty thing possible and still manages to live his life. The dude has trauma galore and his soul mission for many episodes is fueled with regret, anguish, guilt, self-blame. I thought he was going to break in episode 7. He did struggle with the idea of not saving everyone and the unfairness of life, but fate did not give him a moment to breath. Reminds of the the webtoon Random Chat. LET OUR BOY HAVE A MOMENT TO JUST CHILL AND GO ON A DATE WITH HA-MIN, PLEASE. 

So, when I think mental health, I picture a functioning brain. It may have some troubles and need a moment to process life events, but overall is healthy and content. The person can cope with life stressors and feels okay with life majority of the time thanks to self-care, coping skills and other resources. Edward Elric was given the fewest resources but continued to push through to his ultimate goal. His problem-solving skills grow with each situation and he learns to depend on Alphonse as a brother and partner in fights more and more. He is creating his own coping skills and strategies to deal with immense stress. He doesn’t get the option of a therapist, a coping skills app, friends. He and his brother have to figure it out on their own 99% of the time and hope they live to the next day. It gives a lot of inspiration when you feel like nothing is going right and you will never feel better.  

Having a mental health disorder/illness sucks. Plain and simple, none of them are fun to experience and no one wished to feel that way. However, I believe that everyone has some spark in them that can help change some of the maladaptive thoughts and behaviors. It may be buried way deep down, but it is there. Edward discovers his many episodes into the series. 

In the next post, here are some questions to answer:

1. Is there any other instances or aspects of the anime that you want to point out?

2. What is the beef with episode 7?

3. Tell me more about how Ed discovers his inner spark.

Okay, folks! This concludes Part 1 of my FMA rant. I think this may be a three part series. I could go on and on about FMA but I do have A LOT of series to get through. 

[animemental]

Kurama, my foxy crush Part 2

Questions to answer in this post, as promised:

As a young girl, why did I want to be like him?

Who is that second character that really hit me where it hurts?

Did the entirety of YYH do anything for my mental health, or just Kurama?

When I was in elementary school, I always wanted to be boy characters. When my friends and I played games involving role play, I started choosing male characters and leader roles early on. I was Brick from Rowdyruff boys quite a lot. I always wanted to be the one to save the princess or take on the dragon as a knight in shining armor. So, Kurama was a perfect choice for a role model. His androgynous appearance was intriguing and I wanted those super sick plant powers. 

Another character that really got me in the heart strings is *SPOILER ALERT* Gamemaster. 

ONCE AGAIN THIS IS ABOUT TO BE A SPOILER SO READ AT YOUR DISCRETION. 

Gamemaster is a little kid who was tricked and arguably groomed by Sensui to take part in his awful plan. Gamemaster is supposed to be a distraction, an impossible obstacle for the heroes. But, Kurama goes in there like swim wear and understands exactly what needs to happen to save his good friend Kuwabara. 

This kid shook me. Ya’ll, I was shooketh to my coreth. Kurama uses his genuis intellect to pick a part Sensui’s intentions AND figure out how to beat the game within minutes. Then, Kurama takes it upon himself to dish out the bad news. Gamemaster is a lonely kid who just wants a friend and to feel loved. When Sensui becomes his friend (creep) I was screaming internally for GM to gtfu. The kid frustrates me, the plot angers me and the villain's really suck. 

It made me think of how many times I had felt ignored by my busy parents and how I would have easily fallen for this nice guy trap if I had lived in a world where elementary schoolers can stay out late at night. I would have loved the attention this cool adult gave me. Never underestimate the feeling of loneliness, especially in children. 

Last question: Yes and no. I think YYH is just a quality anime and a joy to watch. It just makes me hyped to put it on and binge watch the series each time. It feels like self-care at this point. 

I think I will come back to YYH eventually, but for now, on to the next!

Next up is...an oldy but a goody, Fullmetal Alchemist. This was the first tattoo I designed and below is the picture of the finished product. I love this anime enough permanently rep it. So, you best believe I got A LOT to say. 

[animemental]

Kurama got me like uhhhh

Yu Yu Hakusho is a masterpiece in many ways but Kurama was the best decision the artist could have made for my mental health. 

Picture from wallpapercave.com

Kurama is the long, red haired beauty standing among our heroes. To give you a snippet of hi personality without the spoilers, he is extremely intelligent, genius level in the human world, perceptive, inquisitive, athlete, kind, thoughtful, badass, hot as all heck and foxy. No, he literally is a fox demon bandit. More on that later. 

Kurama is the sensible one of the four teens, always thinking five steps a head and planning for all types of problems before a fight even begins. His powers are versatile and are plant based such as the Rose Whip. During the first season of YYH, I think he is shown as more demure and cautious. You fall in love with the complexity of his characters, knowing there is more about him than he wants to let on to his teammates. As they develop into friendships, you watch the character development become so important to maintaining the uniqueness of Kurama. It is necessary but did not have to be so brilliant. 

I noticed the affect Kurama had on me pretty early on. I thought he was a great character, mysterious and so fun to watch. None of his fights are boring and he consistently entertains with his dry humor and matter-of-fact way of being. He reminds you of Yuki from Fruits Basket almost immediately. But, spolier alert,  Yoshihiro Togashi is the artist and author of Yu Yu Hakusho and when you think of another calm, cool and collected characters in a group of nuts, who do you think of? If you guessed Kurapika, ding ding ding! You got it. In the anime fandom, these characters are famous for being very similar in personality and mannerisms. Kurama is more mature and cut throat than Kurapika only due to his age and demon tendencies. 

So, why did Kurama get me like uhhh..?

When I first watched YYH, I had no idea what anime even was. I was young and sneaking bits of Toonami after midnight. But, when I re-discovered YYH in middle school and with a better grasp about the differences between anime and Western cartoons, Kurama got me like uhhh. His back story, dark character, redemption and all around cool fight scenes really made me love anime. If characters this like can come to life on screen, what else could anime do? Kurama was the second character to surprise me with the level of happiness I felt when watching him in action. I loved rooting for him. I loved his design. And, most importantly, I wanted to be like him. 

So, some more stuff to unpack in later posts, if you care to read:

As a young girl, why did I want to be like him? 

Who is that second character that really hit me where it hurts?

Did the entirety of YYH do anything for my mental health, or just Kurama?

Stay tuned and I will answer all those questions in Part 2!

https://www.zerochan.net/421093

[animemental]

Why Kuroko No Basuke Changed My Life Part 2

This title is still a bit too much. 🤔

Photo from: https://aminoapps.com/c/kuroko-no-basket/amp/blog/memes/wKX0_2MRUoupdlkbWQxdQWWEdWWddKPxZVl

PART 2 OF MY RANT ON KUROKO NO BASUKE AND MENTAL HEALTH. Spoilers will be here, so read at your own discretion. 

In this post, I want to focus on the character that changed my view on my mental health at the time rather than just the show. I highly recommend watching Kuroko no Basuke just for fun and for the sake of watching good anime. However, if you want a variety characters that are unique, entertaining and well developed, look no further.  

Tetsuya Kuroko was the key component of my decision to watch the show. He is a fully conceptualized, original character with a neat backstory. Oddly enough, I related to him so quickly that I got a bit emotional. But, I was an emotional wreck at that time, so maybe I would have related to anything. Even Sensui from YYH who is by far one of the worst villains' of all time. I would have been like, “Yes, Sensui, it totally makes sense to end the life an oblivious child for the gains of demon world domination.”

Kuroko struck a chord with my lonely self. His character goes from being invisible to noticed to purposefully invisible to totally devastated and pissed off, back to his familiar invisibility. His middle school team, famously dubbed The Generation of Miracles, started off as the normal talented middle school team with an abnormal amount of talent. His friends skills grew while his plateaued. But, you know who didn’t let that get him down? Who went above and beyond the call of the sweat covered fictional court and created his own style of basketball so he could just help his friends? My boy, Kuroko of course. 

I thought, if this invisible kid can make friends, why can’t I try to do that again? It is clear I am miserable and cooped up either in the studio, in my room or at the gym for far too long just to avoid my roommates. Something had to change because I did not want to keep going like that. So, I took a chance and made a friend. It took a lot of effort and getting over my fear of rejection. I had never been that way, never worried about social interactions. But the loss of so many friends over a year had me feeling like everything was my fault. Am I annoying? Boring? Too extroverted? Too introverted? It must be my fault. 

And who knows, maybe some of my losses were my fault. I started to clam up, not answering texts or calls, choosing to stay at the studio rather than make it to the last hour of practice. 

This friend, just like Kagami to Kuroko, taught me a lot of things about myself and what I needed to start fixing in order to feel more content with my life. It was a great last year. Just like Kuroko, I had found a team of my own again, learned to trust them and opened up about my struggle with anxiety and low self-esteem for the past year. All was well by the end and I graduated feeling much more myself and ready to take on a new adventure in graduate school. 

So, thanks Kuroko, for helping me gain the confidence to find a solid team of good people. 

**********************************************************************

Okay ya’ll, next up is one of my all time favorite anime and one that I plan to have added to my arm of tattoos: Yu Yu Hakusho!

[animemental]

Why Kuroko No Basuke Changed My Life

Photo from: gojinshi.com

WARNING: I DO NOT PLAN TO SPOIL THE ANIME BUT WILL ALLUDE TO SOME THEMES WITHIN THE SHOW.

Okay, the title is a bit exaggerated. Other things changed my life more significantly than this one anime, but Kuroko No Basuke (Kuroko’s Baskeball) did something to my dark, dingy heart. I was not blessed enough to find this anime or manga sooner in my life, but when I did, it could not have been the right time.

Flashback to undergrad. I was in my third and final year, thankful to graduate early because I was sad, lonely and feeling low. Majority of my friends had moved to transfer, I dropped out of my sorority due to unmatched morals and I had to quit boxing on the university club team to attend my three hour advanced painting course. There was no way to hide the fact that I was depressed and, after a couple horrible roommates, missing home.

Scrolling through myanimelist.com, I decided to take a dive back into sports genre anime. I had watched EyeShield 21, bits of POT, and Free!. The only basketball manga I knew of was Ahiru no Sora. These were fine but missing that little extra something I loved in anime. I gave Kuroko a chance one night when my roommates were being obnoxiously loud and I just wanted to drift away into a land of peace.

It took one episode before I felt it: that weird sensation you get when you are watching a really sick anime.

Here’s some background on the show for those who may not know it and give a crap:

Kuroko is a pain, basically invisible dude in the world of basketball. Coming from a renowned team in middle school, he goes to a ‘no-name’ school, Seirin High, in order to play basketball his way and beat the teammates that caused him to hate the sport at one time. With his new high school team, he finds a way to play his basketball and enjoy the game, all while trying to defeat the Generation of Miracles.

So, with a plot like that, how could you go wrong, right? The genius team behind this creation knew exactly what they were doing and churned out a phenomenal anime adaptation of a popular sports mange. The graphics are great, consistent and the music during games hypes you up. The character development is slow at first but picks up when there’s a big twist and obstacle Kuroko has to face. Lastly, there is no silly super power like abilities. Most of it is believable or just a hint exaggerated, but everything falls under the realm of possibility. 

Now, for the last bit: why did it change my life and how did it help or hinder my mental health? And, why in the world should I sit here and convince others to watch it?

When I felt extremely alone, abandoned by friends, trapped in my situation, I watched Kuroko go through the same things. Imagine being so plain that people don’t even know you are there, right in front of them? Rather than sit and mope about his plainness, he used it to find strategies that worked for him on the court. This is where he would use that misdirection power to turn into a shadow, embracing his invisibility and ends up shining on the court. So, it may sound strange, but how could I transform my loneliness? The humor riddled throughout the show always made me smile and many of the characters of very unique and refreshing to watch. It took some trial and error but after about a month, I had re-structured my daily routine to fit in more self-care, socialization and productivity on my own. Almost like if I was still on a sports team and training. I would spend extra time in the studio, facetime friends that were too far too visit. I would box on my own and teach Zumba classes. I made sure to give myself a break, knowing that I had two choices: sit and wallow, or, get up and do something about it. Just like Kuroko.

Disclaimer: Major Depressive Disorder and other forms of Depression are a serious mental illness. It is not just feeling a bit blue or sad every now and then. There are symptoms and diagnostic criteria you must meet to be evaluated by a mental health professional. Please, do not Google search the DSM and try to diagnosis yourself. This can lead to misconceptions, extra stress and placebo symptoms. It is great to monitor yourself so that you can bring your observations to a professional for diagnosis. I say this because I have personally witnessed the trouble self-diagnosing can cause. Remember, you are not alone and there are resources out there to support you. Call Crisis numbers if needed and reach out to local counselors if you feel like you would like extra support!