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fungifanart · 1 day ago

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I 100% agree with your analysis here and wanted to add something I noticed about the structure of the song itself.

Namely, how the song, around the 2 minute 20 second mark, seems to almost come to a complete stop before jumping into the second chorus, which, to me, is representative of the cycle of depression and self-sabotage Leona finds himself in. Right when his self-hating thoughts might be calming down, something goes wrong and then they're back at full volume. And, from his perspective, maybe that's exactly what he deserves.

Still Infallible, Until Tangible Analysis🔆

I knew from the moment I saw him cry in that opening 4 years ago that Leona was a Sad Boy (™)

My translation may be flawed as it was achieved through an online translator and then cross-referenced with a few others. Lyrics are in orange. --

I’m gonna be making references to a few of the posts I’ve already made because when I’m right, I’m right. And TRULY, it's crazy to me many of these posts were written BEFORE the Chapter 2 light novel, BEFORE Leona’s Chapter 7, BEFORE the Tamashina Mina event and…I just guess I have a gift for clocking this man?? Why I couldn’t have more important gifts in this life, I’m sure I don't know.

Beyond the door that closes, I hear a joyous song drift in, A voice that shakes in the distance, Even as the shadows scatter,

Leona starts out with the imagery that a party is always “going on without him.” He always feels separate especially from his family, and it almost a tease of a life he wishes he could lead.

(GUYS, I literally JUST wrote about the fact that Leona always feels this way and uses this same analogy to express his isolation. I WANNA SCREAM)

“A never-ending wheel where he was crushed underneath it each time, listening to a party go on happily without his presence. Left alone to eat the rotten, sour grapes. Every. Time.” From this fic: X

I wrote this because it reminded so much of Scar and the idea of some sort of "celebration" taking place without him. One thing’s for sure, the writers LOVE weaving Disney move refs into the characters and I just think it really helps you understand the framework for how they see each of the characters.

Circling across the night,

Pacing. He mentions doing circles. A ENDLESS CYCLE LIKE I SAID ABOVE. It’s torment. You know what else it reminds me of? That scene with Scar where he paces in the SHADOWS then kicks a bone in frustration. Bro is PENT UP.

Leona obsesses:

“Hm, I’ve always been a sore loser. Post-mortem is a chess term.” Leona’s gaze circled back to the window again, his hand covered his mouth as he explained. “Analysis of a game after it’s concluded. A player who has just lost the game thanks to a…dubious or stupid move has the chance to win the post-mortem by finding a better one.”

“Oh, right.” They acknowledged. “I-I remember you telling me that. That makes sense I guess: to learn from your mistakes.”

“Tch, yeah.” He grumbled. “Whenever I played chess as a child I would obsess over the post-mortem, every loss or even victory. Every outcome; and what I could have done differently… Pathetic.” He paused before going on. “I couldn’t sleep or even eat after the…overblot. I guess what I didn’t learn as a child, what I still fail to learn now, is that sometimes it doesn’t matter. Fate is stronger than any effort and life is…cruel and random. It doesn’t matter if you learn. When you’re either doomed to repeat the same mistakes, or you have no more options…unable to recover from your defeat. So why should I care…?” Leona finished his thought in a low voice.

(Did I clock him or did I clock him pookies?) Link to full scene here: X

After each loss he takes, he can’t let it go. He LAMENTS, he goes over it over and over in his head.

I yearn without end My pride is used as a shield.

Ah, and the Y E A R N I N G line. HE'S A Y E A R N E R, he cares so much he looks stupid.

We been knew. He takes everything soo seriously. I do think there is a level of him being fearful of not being accepted fully by others. Why else does one hide? BUT, in Chapter 7 he acknowledges his failure to even try to reach out as well.

Leona, despite his flaws, is very aware of his issues and is more emotionally mature than some of the other characters. He isolates himself, even though he hates it. He acknowledges it’s pathetic what he does, but he can't escape the cycle nonetheless. The words he sings are melancholy, like there are waves that beat against a cliff, eroding it. He’s trapped in his cycle of despair, a hell of his own making. Just like his dream.

The fading light, the unchanging world still an infallible color No matter how many times I reached out this hand it always held nothing I might as well turn it all to sand.

What he reaches for–the perfect dream–is does not exist, as fleeting as trying to catch sunlight in his hands, hands that can only bring destruction due to their terrifying magic.

This backs up my belief that Leona thinks that everything he touches goes wrong. (Just like his dream!!) His magic is innately destructive. He is/has been a bad omen of sorts since birth and, at his worst, he feels maybe it’s all he’s good for. Because he lets himself be tormented in this way, he feels the only way out is to destroy everything and with it, his yearning too.

Even the phantoms that play with me are too bright and bothersome If I can remain unfaithful (If I keep my facade up) I sneer at the idea (I can keep laughing it off)

Hope is...bothersome to him, it always has been, because it challenges his mindset. Not only that, but I can see how reverting to that naive mindset that has him hoping AGAIN…is the most painful thing of all. This section about “phantoms” aka “hopes and dreams” makes me think of the Chapter 2 light novel translation.

But the pack spoke eagerly about the future, with sparkling eyes. That alone is terrifying. It's not their expectations that scare me. I’m scared of myself. Of how pathetic I would be if their words inspired me, so that I am never able to give up hope.

Man wants to be wanted, to be needed, to be admired. He craves it but at the same time he’s afraid of it, of how even this little bit of admiration has changed him. Made him soft, made him believe it was possible to win for once. Made him believe for a second it was tangible?

Somewhere in my heart, there's still the lingering hope that, maybe, I can still do it. It's an unbelievably optimistic, sweet thought, filled with wishful thinking. Ruggie, Jack, and the others all talk about these foolish dreams that will never come true, but in the end, I'm just as much a fool as they are.

His own words! Leona forces himself to be apathetic when he has instincts to be idealistic. Back to the line of→ ARROGANCE AS A SHIELD. That’s his ultimate armor. “If I go out of my way to disappoint people as soon as they meet me, then I won't have any expectation to live up to.”

And again, he knows he is insincere, laughing at the naive hopes, SNEERING AT THEM. Dismissing his underclassmen's view of him as naive chatter. Those who believed in him blindly,and admire him. The dorm even calls him their “King” in Chapter 2.

It’s interesting how sometimes Leona is so dismissive of praise, even if he craves it more than anything. It’s almost like…he doesn't truly believe in it and if he did, well that'd be dangerous wouldn't it? Nothing he truly desires will ever be within reach.

At a certain point, it feels like…he almost seeks criticisms of himself. It’s like taking the easy way out. As if he doesn't want others to see him positively. It's a toxic safety blanket...but it's his. He’s so masochistic. As though he takes the criticism of being lazy or ineffective as proof that he IS what they say he is. "Like yeah I do suck, huh?" (Like when Lillia said he’d be a bad King in Chapter 2. and he agrees and laughs.) This negative reaction from others reinforces the concept that Leona often purposely pushes others away as a "test" to see if they even see the real him, and also as a masochistic way to show himself; “Ah yes, I am right again…no one appreciates the real me because the real me sucks.”

Even despite this…we see how good of a leader he is , how excited and driven he is about things he actually cares about like Spelldrive or like mentoring his frosh. HE CAN’T HELP IT, BECAUSE THAT’S WHO HE REALLY IS. NOT THIS SAD SACK WHO CRIES ABOUT HOW LIFE IS UNFAIR.

The crazy thing about this man is he KNOWS all this about himself. It all…self-sabotage at it’s finest. That's the reason Leona's dream was so fucked up. He stands in his OWN way. He casts that shadow over his own light.

He is SO afraid of failure he won't try. He wants to be in control of the narrative completely or not at all. And I feel that's where Leona’s ego comes in. He wants to control how people view him to be all these “great things”, but he just hasn’t put the work in. He KNOWS it's his fault.

WHICH IS CRAZY BC THIS IS exactly what he warned Jamil about in Chapter 6. HE JUST DOESN'T PRACTICE WHAT HE PREACHES.

Remaining "nonchalant" is cope-ium to Leona. His carefree persona is so carefully put into place every day of his life.

Like in my overblot animation analysis I know Leona is very comfy in his coping mechanisms, that is, until he's NOT. UNTIL he’s inspired by his underclassmen or UNTIL he hears others being praised in the way he ONLY WISHES he was. (Like Malleus or his brother) All the while ignoring and not truly absorbing the praise those who genuinely already care for him as he is.

It's a very...complex concept and I think those who get it, get it. I can see why Leona is so divisive and his fans are so loyal. It really takes A LOT of work to understand his madness, and NOW we have so much content which CLEARLY shows his true nature, there really is no excuse anymore for people to deem his character shallow IMHO.

Maybe that’s why I do get so bent out of shape when people continue to assume Leona is/will be nonchalant with everything. Like come on ya’ll ....you’re…falling the character’s facade.

NO, Leona is not a “delinquent trope” or even “broody bad boy”, he's more a "lazy genius" and "begrudging mentor." He is at his best when he is helping others, when he is teaching, and seeing the light in OTHERS. Savanaclaw IS HIS LIGHT. You compare Diadem and this song and YOU SEE IT RIGHT???

And the fact HE cannot see this himself is...heartbreaking. When left to his own devices and “all the shadows have scattered” as he says…it’s almost like he can't cope in his own brain. So, he HAS to disengage, tell himself he doesn’t care about anything.

Man can't stand himself. Leona is such an interesting representation of self-loathing, depression and mental illness. Like...I remember the first fic I wrote about Leona when there was barely any content of him and my first instinct was that "Yeah this grumpy ass-depressed man 100% seeks connection…even though he doesn't know HOW exactly to do it."

Savanaclaw is where he belongs, and I’m hoping we get to see him grow to the point he can live with himself better when he has to say goodbye to NRC. Really be able to sit with himself and love himself for who he is.

If you've ever seen a person you love struggle with self-worth and self-loathing it is truly one of the most heartbreaking things…because at the end of the day, YOU cannot help them. They have to help themselves. As much praise as he gets from his underclassmen it's still NOT enough. He needs to accept himself as ENOUGH. He needs to have pride in himself. Because the pride we see with Leona now...is just a mask.

TBH, for years I always had a feeling that he was a secretly self-deprecating person and I was RIGHT. Holding back as much as he does with his skills and emotions is THE SAME form of self-sabotage he accuses Jamil of. He could be reaching out, but he’s not. He's held himself back because he's afraid to care, to be invested again. And…I think he’s afraid that he’ll never be enough.

The light I can't grasp, the twisted gaze its infallible color Even if I lay out reasons to blame someone Every time I turn my back, And still I hold out this hand, turning everything into sand

This part confused me a bit with the wording TBH BUT- The last line ends with what feels like a self-admittance that he has no one to blame but himself. Despite what he says, he knows he’s given up.

And maybe despite his nonchalance, it does hurt when people turn their back on him. (Another TLK reference?)

Or…(because I am a bit shaky on the translation) perhaps he’s saying he’s turning his back on the light. (Hope.) I mean when you think about it, who can really hold light? It’s as if it was an impossible task to start with. The metaphor works as well as references TLK again. And that if the Light = Hope, he is self- admitting that sometimes he does reach out , he does dream, he is a sentimental fool sometimes. (Who totally looks at the stars.) He can be a hopeful fool and he falls into the trap of yearning for things that can never be. Over and Over. I often HC that Leona was quite a sensitive and idealistic child and this check out to me.

Considering each of these songs is about the feeling behind each of the overblots, it makes sense to what he felt his only option was to turn it all to sand, mirroring the void he feels within himself.

I’ll end with some more of Leona’s Chapter 2 light novel quotes:

I'm not strong, I’m not wise, and I'm not loved. But is that who I am? I can't accept that. That's the one thing I do not want to admit.

He cannot commit to not hoping/ not caring at all though he can’t commit to believing in himself fully either. He’s stuck in a toxic cycle of his own making, I fear.

I'm utterly fed up with how unreasonable I am. Don't make me think that there might be a chance. Just let me believe that there is no point in having expectations. I am tired of struggling and suffering for things I cannot attain. I hate knowing how insignificant and boring I am. Maybe what I should be striving for is the strength to give up. And that sounds like the most painful thing of all. Ah, life is truly unfair.

(Link to this analysis: X) Leona is often poked fun of for sleeping all the time and yes, it his vice but also his sanctuary, he’s just…tired. And this song does a beautiful job at portraying his weariness. Musically, I enjoyed this very much! As with Idia and Jamil, MAJOR props to the VAs for portraying their characters so diligently that it even touched me, despite not being a Japanese speaker! I could have heard this randomly and known who it was. I feel the emotions…and it sounds like Leona. The rock ballad and slightly whiny vibes make me think of old mid-2000 rock, like Linkin Park type stuff?

#leona kingscholar #twst #twisted wonderland #leona twisted wonderland

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