idolserenity-blog

[idolserenity-blog]

With this, comes a little story about me and my best friend. Who; shocker, is a man.

We've been good friends since my junior year of high school, which was around five years ago. He was a senior at the time, and after he graduated we lost contact. Two years later, he just happened to be eating at the restaurant I worked at, and we caught up and exchanged numbers.

We immediately became close again, to the point of becoming very best friends. We love each other and support tf outta each other.

2018 has been a very hard year for me. I quit my very first job after three years of hard work going nowhere, I struggled with my mental health, gained back the thirty pounds I lost, and struggled to find stable work. I've always had problems with self-esteem. My confidence as a woman and as a person was miniscule, to say the very least.

During the summer, where my condition was at its worst, I talked to him about it. And I expressed my desire to change; to be a more positive and loving person.

This should've been the first red flag. Where instead of being supportive, my best friend dismissed the idea. Talking about how he doesn't want me to change.

I explained it would be better for me. That I don't like being sad and angry all the time. He just kept saying "well, I like you this way."

I was confused. I wanted to change for myself, not him! So why was he so upset?

Fast forward to fall. I've slowly but surely been eating healthier and doing my best to reinforce a positive state of mind. And have more respect for myself. Be more assertive; speak my mind.

It's best I mention how meek I am. I have a hard time saying no, especially when I'm anxious.

My best friend is aware of that.

My best friend is also aware of the fact that I am not attracted to him, and that I would never have sex with him.

I should have said no. I should have pushed away.

But I didn't. I just laid there and pretended to like it to get it over with.

Three times over the course of our friendship. And twice during the month of fall. The fourth time was the last.

I feel so disgusted with myself when I think "he raped me". It wasn't rape. I froze up and laid still, and just said nothing as I hid my face in a pillow. I just wanted it to end.

The latest red flag was just yesterday.

The whole "report e-thots to the IRS" thing pisses me off. It's clear that guys are only doing it because they hate women doing what they want with their body. If they were doing it for justice's sake like they claim, then they'd report their neighbors, coworkers, drug dealers, streamers, etc.

As a woman, it's very clear to me the malicious intent.

And when my best friend brought up how "funny" it was to him, I retaliated. I spoke up. I told him how it wasn't funny; that those guys were just women-haters, and that those innocent girls are even getting harassed and doxxed.

And he dismissed me.

Instead of listening and thinking "hey, she probably knows what she's talking about, being a woman and actually having more information on the situation than I do", he just kept enforcing his point and dismissing mine.

We cut our hangout short last night. Which is fine, whatever.

But what he did this morning has me absolutely furious. I've never been this mad at him.

And that's because he sent me a video about "why you should report your local e-girl to the IRS"

And he said "cry more".

That just proves to me that he doesn't take me seriously, and has little to no respect for my opinions.

Mind you, I actually agreed with him on some points in his argument. E-girls should be reported to the IRS, yes, but when there is SUBSTANTIAL EVIDENCE OF TAX FRAUD.

My argument wasn't that. My argument was the reasoning behind it being that most of these guys hate women. And of course, that went over his head and he just kept arguing his shitty point.

This rant is long, but that's because I'm outraged and honestly a little scared.

Is my best friend like them? With the way he treats me and all.

You know something I’ve learned?

You cannot give your opinion on something that doesn’t involve you, unless you’re willing to learn.

If you’re a man, you have no place to talk about sexism against women.

If you’re white, you can’t talk about racism against colored people.

If you’re cis, you can’t talk about transphobia.

If you’re straight, you can’t talk about homophobia.

Wanna know why?

BECAUSE YOU HAVEN’T EXPERIENCED THOSE THINGS.

Women experience sexism differently than men.

Colored people experience racism differently than white people.

Cisphobia and heterophobia are COMPLETELY different from transphobia and homophobia.

You can’t try to put your opinion out there when you haven’t experienced it in the same way they have.

ESPECIALLY if you aren’t willing to learn. If you wanna put your opinion out there with the INTENTION of learning about the matter, then keep your mouth shut.

Tl;dr understand that minorities experience racism/transphobia/homophobia/sexism differently and be willing to learn about the matter or SHUT THE FUCK UP

This status is brought to you by a woman who is tired of men thinking they can tell me what is and isn’t sexist.

[idolserenity-blog]

You know something I've learned?

You cannot give your opinion on something that doesn't involve you, unless you're willing to learn.

If you're a man, you have no place to talk about sexism against women.

If you're white, you can't talk about racism against colored people.

If you're cis, you can't talk about transphobia.

If you're straight, you can't talk about homophobia.

Wanna know why?

BECAUSE YOU HAVEN'T EXPERIENCED THOSE THINGS.

Women experience sexism differently than men.

Colored people experience racism differently than white people.

Cisphobia and heterophobia are COMPLETELY different from transphobia and homophobia.

You can't try to put your opinion out there when you haven't experienced it in the same way they have.

ESPECIALLY if you aren't willing to learn. If you wanna put your opinion out there with the INTENTION of learning about the matter, then keep your mouth shut.

Tl;dr understand that minorities experience racism/transphobia/homophobia/sexism differently and be willing to learn about the matter or SHUT THE FUCK UP

This status is brought to you by a woman who is tired of men thinking they can tell me what is and isn't sexist.

[idolserenity-blog]

Woman: “(unattractive man) raped me.”

Society: “Oh come on. You would have liked it if he was attractive. I bet he just said hi to you and you called it rape because he’s ugly. Besides, you’re a b*tch for not giving him a chance just because of his appearance.”

Woman: “(attractive man) raped me.”

Society: “Oh come on. Women throw themselves at him. He has no reason to rape anyone. I bet you’re just mad that he didn’t call you the next day, or maybe you’re just after his money.”

[idolserenity-blog]

I just read this on twitter…

[idolserenity-blog]

writer: this is one of my male characters! he cares about his guy friends and loves them deeply.

tumblr: oh! so he’s gay!

writer: uh…no, he’s attracted to women.

tumblr: ….so he’s bi!

writer: uhh…no…….he loves his guy friends but he’s not romantically/sexually attracted to them.

tumblr: ….so you’re homophobic.

writer:

[idolserenity-blog]

Aight

A better, more positive Tumblr

Since its founding in 2007, Tumblr has always been a place for wide open, creative self-expression at the heart of community and culture. To borrow from our founder David Karp, we’re proud to have inspired a generation of artists, writers, creators, curators, and crusaders to redefine our culture and to help empower individuality.

Over the past several months, and inspired by our storied past, we’ve given serious thought to who we want to be to our community moving forward and have been hard at work laying the foundation for a better Tumblr. We’ve realized that in order to continue to fulfill our promise and place in culture, especially as it evolves, we must change. Some of that change began with fostering more constructive dialogue among our community members. Today, we’re taking another step by no longer allowing adult content, including explicit sexual content and nudity (with some exceptions).  

Let’s first be unequivocal about something that should not be confused with today’s policy change: posting anything that is harmful to minors, including child pornography, is abhorrent and has no place in our community. We’ve always had and always will have a zero tolerance policy for this type of content. To this end, we continuously invest in the enforcement of this policy, including industry-standard machine monitoring, a growing team of human moderators, and user tools that make it easy to report abuse. We also closely partner with the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children and the Internet Watch Foundation, two invaluable organizations at the forefront of protecting our children from abuse, and through these partnerships we report violations of this policy to law enforcement authorities. We can never prevent all bad actors from attempting to abuse our platform, but we make it our highest priority to keep the community as safe as possible.

So what is changing?

Posts that contain adult content will no longer be allowed on Tumblr, and we’ve updated our Community Guidelines to reflect this policy change. We recognize Tumblr is also a place to speak freely about topics like art, sex positivity, your relationships, your sexuality, and your personal journey. We want to make sure that we continue to foster this type of diversity of expression in the community, so our new policy strives to strike a balance.

Why are we doing this?

It is our continued, humble aspiration that Tumblr be a safe place for creative expression, self-discovery, and a deep sense of community. As Tumblr continues to grow and evolve, and our understanding of our impact on our world becomes clearer, we have a responsibility to consider that impact across different age groups, demographics, cultures, and mindsets. We spent considerable time weighing the pros and cons of expression in the community that includes adult content. In doing so, it became clear that without this content we have the opportunity to create a place where more people feel comfortable expressing themselves.

Bottom line: There are no shortage of sites on the internet that feature adult content. We will leave it to them and focus our efforts on creating the most welcoming environment possible for our community.

So what’s next?

Starting December 17, 2018, we will begin enforcing this new policy. Community members with content that is no longer permitted on Tumblr will get a heads up from us in advance and steps they can take to appeal or preserve their content outside the community if they so choose. All changes won’t happen overnight as something of this complexity takes time.

Another thing, filtering this type of content versus say, a political protest with nudity or the statue of David, is not simple at scale. We’re relying on automated tools to identify adult content and humans to help train and keep our systems in check. We know there will be mistakes, but we’ve done our best to create and enforce a policy that acknowledges the breadth of expression we see in the community.

Most importantly, we’re going to be as transparent as possible with you about the decisions we’re making and resources available to you, including more detailed information, product enhancements, and more content moderators to interface directly with the community and content.

Like you, we love Tumblr and what it’s come to mean for millions of people around the world. Our actions are out of love and hope for our community. We won’t always get this right, especially in the beginning, but we are determined to make your experience a positive one.

Jeff D’Onofrio CEO

[idolserenity-blog]

smash that mf reblog if u hate pedophiles

[idolserenity-blog]

Heard some important information on Twitter today, and thought I’d post it here for anyone who may not have heard it. This is actually a thing, devised by a human rights organisation called Karma Nirvana.

Reblog to save a life?

[idolserenity-blog]

Stop dating abusive women 2018

[idolserenity-blog]

Let's talk about mynoise.net

Have you ever been listening to Rainymood and thought, “Yeah, this is good … but it would be nice if I could customize the sound more, or if there was a little more choice.

Let me introduce you to MyNoise.

MyNoise is a customizable sounscape looper with so many options, even within each soundscape.  So say, for instance, you really love rain sounds when you write or study or relax.  Anything.  I know I’m a big fan of rain sounds.  They have a page for that.

But say you like really high, pattery rain, and LOTS of low thunder.  Here’s where MyNoise really stands out: you can customize that.  See those sliders with all the cute colors?  That is your equalizer. You can adjust the levels based on what you want to hear more and less of.  Here’s how it looks when you want high, pattery rain and low, rumbly thunder:

But say rain isn’t really your jam.  Say you want something a little more ambient, a little more background noise-y.  Something with people.  Well, they have customizable coffee house chatter that even has the levels listed for things like “kitchen,” “babble,” and “table”:

Or say you miss the ocean.

Or say you miss your cat.

Or say you miss your spaceship.

Or say you miss the dungeon where you and your team of scalawag adventurers used to explore and face off against, say, dragons.  In the dungeon.

This site is seriously so helpful, and those are just a fraction of every kind of sounscape the site has to offer.  The best part is that if you want to layer it with music (for instance, I’ll layer a playlist + rain + coffee shop if the scene I’m writing takes place in a coffee shop), you can adjust the master volume, meaning all of your layers stay at their respective volumes, just louder or quieter.

Enjoy!

[idolserenity-blog]

Reblogging not only for OP's wonderful art and JOJ, but

GHOSTY GOO FINGERS

Man, if I was flondled by the phantom hands I would be the thirstiest christine Inspired by these spicy hands by John Owen Jones

[idolserenity-blog]

This👏needs👏more👏notes👏

The tumblr social justice community is the most condescending, pretentious, exclusive, manipulative, abusive, overdramatic, ridiculous, narrow minded, entitled, intolerant, toxic community I’ve ever come into contact with and you should be fucking ashamed of yourselves.

We are supposed to be activists and educators and peace makers and lovers. We’re supposed to be changing the world and leaving the younger generation with a better one. But your pride is too important to you.

[idolserenity-blog]

So I found this cool website for learning ancient languages

go wild

[idolserenity-blog]

This is fucking amazing

[idolserenity-blog]

I am concerned.

you’re welcome fischfuck : - )

[idolserenity-blog]