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She has everything to be proud of🥹🇨🇭

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Something to get you all ready for tomorrow:

Kim: What on earth??

*A large herd of cows has gathered around a giant screen. Some are wearing flower crowns. One is holding a tiny Swiss flag in its mouth. Laia, wearing a high-vis vest and a clipboard, is addressing them like a festival steward.*

Laia: That’s it, moooove in closer. Calves to the front - we don’t want any tiny hooves getting trampled. It’s humid today, so keep hydrated at the troughs. And remember: flower crowns are mandatory, not optional.

*A particularly enthusiastic cow lets out a dramatic moo*

Laia nodding sagely: Yes, yes, Lia knows you're here. Her special message will play at half-time.

Kim: Do you want to tell me why we’ve got 50 cows on our training pitch?

Laia: Me and the head cow – name’s Barbara – came to an arrangement. They mow the pitch, I let them watch the game for free. They’re surprisingly punctual and only occasionally eat the cones.

Kim: This is… wildly unregulated.

Laia: Shhh! The Swiss national anthem’s starting. It’s their favourite bit – they’ve been practising the harmonies.

Kim: …Right.

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Always loved the Swedes.

Great bunch of lads 🇸🇪🤝🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿

STINA, THATS MY GOAT.

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Renee: And now a few words from our new signing.

Olivia: Hey. I'm not a lumberjack, or a fur trader.

Olivia: And I don't live in an igloo, or eat blubber, or own a dogsled.

Olivia: And I don't know Jimmy, Sally or Suzy from Canada, although I'm certain they're really, really nice.

Olivia: I have a Prime Minister, not a President.

Olivia: I speak English and French, NOT American. And I pronounce it 'ABOUT', NOT 'A BOOT'.

Olivia: I can proudly sew my country's flag on my backpack. I believe in peace keeping, NOT policing. DIVERSITY, NOT assimilation, AND THAT THE BEAVER IS A TRULY PROUD AND NOBLE ANIMAL!

Olivia: A TOQUE IS A HAT, A CHESTERFIELD IS A COUCH, AND IT IS PRONOUCED 'ZED' NOT 'ZEE', 'ZED'!!!

Olivia: CANADA IS THE SECOND LARGEST LANDMASS! THE FIRST NATION OF HOCKEY! AND THE BEST PART OF NORTH AMERICA!

Olivia: MY NAME IS OLIVIA!! AND I AM CANADIAN!!!!!!!!

Rest of team: ....

Olivia: Thank you.

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I love that one of the first things new players always do it meet win :)

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Olivia Smith is a gunner! For a world record breaking fee she’s joined the Arsenal… Katie must have promised to behave😂

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Renee walking into Wheatley's office:

smiling through it all. Can’t believe this is my life

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if you have maren mjelde and you're not using her for penalties, then you're just asking to lose

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I've rarely seen a more validating sentence in my entire life.

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A new teammate joins the Arsenal goalkeeper union! Welcome Anneke Borbe!

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Getting ready for Fridays game

Mariona talking about Switzerland: No, this is no longer Lia's Magical Kingdom. It's mine!

Mariona: This shall henceforth be known as Mario's Mojo Dojo Casa Land.

Lia: You don't have to say dojo and casa.

Mariona: But you do because it feels good. Try it!

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Arsenal Youngling: Can you bring back Power Rangers? I don't know what it is you do, but you seem important enough to get that done.

Renee: ...

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One of the all time greats that ever did it. Pure magic on the ball.

I'm so sad her career didn't end on her terms.

Tobin Heath you'll always be my favourite player's favourite player.

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the club world cup is just the most unimportant and worthless competition ever. i follow football media (sometimes involuntarily) pretty much daily and genuinely had no idea who won or that is was even finished. bonus of being runner up is not going there.

imagine as a player, a full season, winning your league, then off to do some internationals and instead of hanging about on an expensive yacht in the med you have to go to america to push more saudi money up giannis crack and maybe also do your hamstring or better, a little mcl in.

and if i was one of the staff members who don’t have millions in the bank, i think i would quit or set something on fire, maybe.

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Lia gets taken down by a referee. Mariona takes down the referee😅😂

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Taylor: I need one of those Kim Kardashian jobs where they pay me to exist.