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runner5anna · 6 months ago

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zombies run secret santa for @are-you-sure-its-me-you-see

HI i hear you like hurt / comfort ?? HERE YOU GO

It's set post-season three, pre-season four.

It's coldand dark, and everyone is tired. Yet, it's the first Demons and Darkness session in months. Sam and 5 are sat together, waiting for everyone, as they slowly radio that they can't attend for whatever reason. They've not talked in months, let alone looked at one another. And now they're stuck in a room together.

Big thanks to @notforconsumption or @delucadarling !!

The ticking of the clock echoed around the room, the hand moving in time with Five’s bouncing leg. It was a cold, fresh day. The type that makes you wear gloves in doors and blankets around the house.

Tick. Bounce. Tick. Bounce. Tick. Bounce.

On a day like this, Sam and Five would have made a blanket fort in the shack. They’d huddle against the cold with warm tea and whatever snacks they could salvage from the kitchens.

That was a long time ago now.

Bounce. Tick. Bounce. Tick.

Fifteen minutes. They were supposed to start fifteen minutes ago. Yet, still, the radio calls still rolled in.

Jody was first. ‘Yup, sorry Sam. I had something last minute crop up. Sorry.’

Then it was Simon. ‘Yes Sammy boy…Jenny and I had other plans! Sorry I didn’t tell you.’

Finally, it was Maxine and Paula. ‘So sorry Sam! Sara’s been fussing. Again.’

It had been weeks since Five and Sam had a proper conversation. Ever since Moonchild, ever since Sara, ever since the seasonal depression on top the normal depression…It was all rolling on - and the once free flowing sunny conversion turned to frigid small talk.

Tick. Bounce. Tick. Bounce. Tick. Bounce.

Something. He had to say something. They couldn’t just sit there in this freezing room watching the snow pile up outside. Sam had to at least start a conversation. But what to say?

‘So…how are you?’

Bounce. Bounce. Bounce.

He was only met with the ruffle of fabric. Five was looking at something - away with the fairies as they used to call it. Now, Sam knew the glassy eyed look. It was Moonchild. Or the cocktail mix of meds that Labotse had put them on. Sam reached out over the table, tapping it with his palm. The noise startled Five out of their daze with a gasp.

‘How are you? Are you okay?’ Sam reiterated. He held their gaze firmly, speaking loud and clear.

‘Fine.’

‘That's good…Maxine and Paula will be here soon.’

‘I heard the radio.’

‘Sorry…sorry. I thought that you weren't listening.’

‘I was.’ They turned back to their original position - curled tight, like a spring.

And so, the incessant silence returned.

Bounce. Tick. Bounce. Tick.

Once, the conversation flowed like warm spring water. It would go on for hours, winding around them. They’d talk and talk long into the night, just sharing stories. Even then, when the stories ran dry, the silence didn’t feel hostile. Just a pleasant lull.

Five sat across from him, expression black and unreadable. They had their nails pressed into their cheeks, leaving little Cs imprinted in their skin.

Five would sit beside him, under blankets and sharing snacks and secrets. Under giggles and hot chocolate they’d spend time just together.

Sam missed it. Deeply. He’d feel a chasm deepen in his chest whenever they’d pass by. He missed his friend, his runner, his Five.

‘Fuck it.’ Sam huffed. ‘It's freezing. I’m putting the kettle on. While we have tea, you can help me plan this encounter.’

He slapped the table as he stood up, knocking down a few minis which Five hurriedly propped back up.

‘The paints and brushes are on top of my bag.’ He pointed at the satchel with a spoon. ‘Can you grab them for me?’

At the suggestion, Five looked like a deer in the headlights - all wide eyed and scared.

‘Go on. I bought them for you. I know you like them.’

They looked down at his bag, then up at him. They didn’t move a muscle.

Sam flicked the kettle on and headed over to the bag, placing it on the table. He dug through and placed the paints and brushes on the table.

Five didn’t move. They stared at the paints and brushes like foreign, alien objects.

Sam pushed them towards Five. ‘Here.’ He grabbed a half painted mini off of the table - A finely detailed golden dragon. ‘You started it before…’ The words got stuck on his tongue.

The kettle began to screech, and he turned on his heel. Good timing really.

While he made the tea, he could hear the rustle of the paints and Five opened them.

‘It’s been a long time since I’ve done this.’ Five spoke gently, in an almost robotic tone. Their voice was choked from underuse.

‘It has.’ Sam inhaled sharp, braving himself for the conversation. ‘We should do it more often - like we used to?’

Five put the brush down and cleared their throat. ‘Is…it safe?’

‘What do you mean?’

‘Will it be safe? How do you know I won’t…’ They made a stabbing motion with their hands, mimicking the score of Psycho. ‘…you know.’

‘No. No I don’t know.’

Five fiddled with the ends of the brush, flicking out the crusted paint between the bristles.

Sam poured the water over the bags. He’d even allowed himself to have a fresh one. One mint tea for him, a chamomile for Five. It felt natural. He’d done it millions of times before.

‘You do know what I mean.’

‘I really don’t.’ Sam chuckled. He handed the mug towards Five.

‘Thank you. You’ve…put it in my favourite mug.’

‘I have!’ Sam beamed. ‘It’s been ages since we’ve done this. I thought you might like it.’

It was a Gromit shaped mug - a deeply impractical thing. Five was obsessed with it. Because it was so difficult to drink out of, no one else would touch it, and it was large enough to hold a ‘decent cuppa’ as they’d call it.

Five picked the brush up and put the end into their mouth, chewing. All of a sudden, they flinched, gasped and pulled it out. The brush clattered as it hit the hardwood floor. ‘Sorry!’

‘Why are you apologising?’

‘Sorry, should I not have done it?’ Their breathing became sharp and ragged as they looked to the floor, shoving their face behind their hands.

‘Five, it’s all right.’ Sam was well versed in talking people through panic attacks. ‘Just breathe with me. In for one, out for two. Are you ready?’

He counted up in twos, staying in front of Five, ready to pull their hands away if they started to scratch or draw blood.

‘In for four, out for six. You got this.’

‘I can’t. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.’

‘Five, I don’t know what you're apologising about.’

‘Chewing…’ They coughed and hiccuped between gasps of air. ‘Chewing your paintbrush.’

‘Oh - don’t worry about that. It’s just a paintbrush. I chew them all the time.’

5’s deep eyes began to well even more with tears. ‘Are you sure?’

‘Pretty sure. I haven’t chewed that one. The marks there are you, actually. Didn’t think we should be sharing chewed pens. That was gross before the apocalypse.’ Sam dug around in his pockets and produced a handkerchief. ‘I have a feeling this is about more than a paintbrush.’

‘What do you mean?’

‘People don’t start having panic attacks for no reason. Talk to me. I’m here to listen.’ He resisted the urge to wipe the tears from Five’s face as he once did. They’d simply flinch away.

Five cleared their throat as they took the handkerchief. They pulled their feet up, crossing their legs. ‘Uh…’ their eyes skipped about the room. ‘It’s just…’

‘Moonchild?’ Sam offered.

‘Yeah. Yeah that. She used to get…funny about me chewing her pens. Said it was gross. That morning she got all…fussy about it before sending me to Abel. And I am looking up at you with a pen in my mouth and suddenly I watch it all over again. Whenever I blink I am back in that moment.’

‘Like a flashback?’

‘Yeah. That. It will be the pens, then the boat…then the axe..’

Sam held his hand out, lying palm up on the table. ‘I don’t blame you.’

‘Pardon?’

‘I don’t blame you. It wasn’t your fault. You weren’t all there, Five. I can’t blame you for something you can’t control.’

Five’s tear stained face stared back at him. For a moment their lip wobbled, until they pounced forwards, wrapping their arms around his shoulders.

Sam gasped and flinched - his muscles going tense. A natural reaction. His hands hung in mid air. It had been so long. Usually, Five would jump away if he came anywhere near them. Yet, here they were, hanging off his shoulders.

‘I’m just so scared. So scared I’ll hurt you. Or that I have hurt you more. Or someone else.’

Sam slowly lowered his hands down, gently resting them on Five’s back, rubbing up and down. ‘You won’t hurt me.’

‘How do you know that? How do you know that for sure?’

‘Because we have plans for that.’

‘What happens if those fail?’

Sam lifted Five off of him, holding them by their shoulders. He looked into their watercolour eyes - watery and round. ‘Because if you were going to hurt me, you wouldn’t get so upset about it.’

Five sniffed and leaned back, holding the handkerchief in their hands, pressed against their cheek. ‘Why are you so nice to me? It’s not like I deserve it.’

‘Because you're my friend. My Five. And I trust you.’

5’s lip curled at the edge, showing a single white tooth. It was brief, but picturesque. A rare sight nowadays.

‘Thank you.’ They mouthed.

It was 8.30 by the time Sara was asleep. She was fussy, teething probably. Maxine had been pacing up and down the hallway while Paula tried whatever home remedy she could think of. Eventually, a combination of Celery sticks, rubbing her ears and a poor rendition of Sam’s Chinese lullaby to get her to sleep. And so, she was relinquished over to the babysitter so they could pretend to be normal humans for a few hours. By pretending to be elves, gnomes and druids.

‘Hey! I am so sorry we’re late-’ Maxine was cut off by Paula grabbing her swiftly backwards.

‘Shhh.’

‘Why did you do that?’

‘Look.’

Sam had Five tucked under his arm, a book in the other. He talked gently as he ran his finger along the pages of the game master manual.

‘What about this one?’

‘No. That one has no legendary action. If it's a battle against the BBEG, it's got to have a legendary action.’ Five said back. They cupped tea in their hands. The smell of chamomile sang through the air.

‘True. But it looks so cool.’

‘Could we homebrew it? Combine it with another monster. Steal a few legendary actions.’

‘Wouldn't hurt - would it?’

Five nodded, flicking through the monster manual on the table. ‘Here. ‘This is a good Legendary action...’

‘It’s been ages since they’ve done that.’ Paula whispered over Maxine’s shoulder. She wrapped her arms around her waist, bringing her into her chest. ‘Let's just…give them space. Let them be together. Just for now.

#zombies run #zr #runner five #runner 5 #sam yao #zombies run!#zrs3 spoilers #zombies run secret Santa 2024 #zombies run secret Santa #zr secret Santa #zrx

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