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leverage-ot3 · 5 years ago

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notable moments from The Homecoming Job

leverage 1.02

Dr. LeRoque: Pardon me, Mr. uh?

Nate: Oh, uh, Nathan Ford. You’re Dr. LeRoque?

Dr. LeRoque: Can I talk to you outside?

Perry: Doc, he’s cool, I found him on the internet.

Dr. LeRoque: Yes, that never goes badly. (to Nate) With me.

Nate: Uh… I’ll be in touch.

(Perry hands him the flash drive and Nate follows the doctor out of the room)

okay but big mood “I found him on the Internet” “that never goes badly”

but also,,, bruh we NEED to know how their clients found them,,, like ??? H O W

- - - - -

Dr. LeRoque: You can’t just come in here and get his hopes up!

Nate: I’m just here to provide options.

Dr. LeRoque: There are no options.

Nate: The Veteran’s hospital …

Dr. LeRoque: Is 400 miles away and has a five month waiting list. Everybody in that rehab room is a reservist. When reservists get out they get sent home no matter where home is or how far it is from the treatment they need. Nobody thought this through. We’re not a rich hospital, I cashed in every favor I had to take care of these kids for as long as I could but I have to go back in there and tell Perry we can’t treat him anymore. I have to do that. Run your scam on somebody with money.

Nate: It’s not a scam. I’m here to help.

Dr. LeRoque: People don’t just show up to help. That’s not the way the world works.

leverage really called out the us government’s negligence and neglect for veterans in episode TWO and we stan them so hard for it

leverage said “go big or go home” from the VERY beginning

- - - - -

[Audition Room]

Sophie: Why? Why? I can’t live like this anymore. With the lies and the filth. No. Help me. I want to be clean. I want to be clean.

(two directors watching are overwhelmed by just how awful Sophie is)

Rogers: Yeah, you understand this is a soap commercial, right?

Sophie: Uh huh. When I thought about Peggy I came up with this idea that the dirt was really this giant metaphor, for sin.

(Sophie’s cell rings, she glances at her purse)

Rogers: You should take that. No, no you should take that.

Sophie: Oh. (answers phone) Hello? When? (hangs up) Peggy killed her first husband.

Rogers: Thank you

I literally scream every time I LOVE SOPHIE S O MUCH WHAT THE FUCK

- - - - -

[Parking Lot]

(one man is laying on the hood of a car and another falls on top of him. Eliot turns away from the car as the last man pulls a gun on him. They stare at each other for a moment, then a phone rings)

Eliot: That you or me?

(man seems unsure as the phone continues to ring)

Eliot: Could be important. Does your mama have your number?

(man looks down and Eliot grabs the gun, punching the man in the neck. The man goes down, choking. Eliot unloads the gun and tosses it away before pulling out his phone and answering it)

Eliot: Yeah? Nothing, why?

“nothing”? I’m-

- - - - -

(guard walks by a painting hanging in a museum gallery. He looks away for a moment, and when he looks back a rope is dangling where the painting had been. A cell phone rings)

Parker: Parker. Shh. No, I wasn’t shushing you.

I love her, your honor

- - - - -

(Parker, Eliot and Sophie come around the corner and head down the hall)

Parker: From the first job?

Eliot: Yeah.

Parker: I put all that money in a Swiss bank account.

Eliot: Millions of dollars and you didn’t buy anything?

Parker: I don’t like stuff, I like money.

Sophie: I bought a little retirement home, an island.

Eliot: Nice.

Sophie: In Dubai. And Tokyo.

Parker: What about you?

(they reach the door which has a small envelope with Sophie’s name written on it. Sophie takes it off the door and opens it)

Eliot: Yeah, I’m not about to tell two known thieves what I did with a multi-million dollar payout.

Sophie: Don’t you trust us?

(Eliot doesn’t answer.)

- - - - -

Hardison: This is our new cover story. Welcome to Leverage Consulting and Associates, founded in 1913 by the great Harland Leverage the Third.

(Hardison points to a painting on the wall of an older man that greatly resembles Nate)

Sophie: I’m sorry. Nate is going to kill you.

Eliot: Did you paint that?

Hardison: I’m gifted.

Eliot: That’s weird

HARLAND LEVERAGE THE THIRD

- - - - -

Hardison: Now Leverage Consulting Inc. is squeaky clean, all corporate taxes on record as being paid for the last ninety years. (He gives them each a cell and a folder) All your identities as partners, your payroll taxes are paid, you guys have pension plans and dental, those are employment records, case files and company newsletters.

(the group walks the halls of the Leverage offices as they discuss the files)

Parker: In 1998 I won the sack race at the 4th of July picnic. Cool.

Hardison: Now these, these are your offices. Now you can bring something like a photo, you know what, a plant! I’m a big supporter of dandelions.

hardison goes hardcore when coming up with backstories

- - - - -

(Hardison opens doors to a conference room that holds a long table with many chairs around it. One wall is dedicated to large TV screens)

Sophie: Nice.

Eliot: My man.

Hardison: Long version or the short version?

Sophie: Short.

Eliot: Short version.

Parker: Shortest.

(Hardison hits a remote the TV screens illustrate his explanation)

Hardison: Photo and video forensics programs, back doors into every electronic banking system in the world, running heuristic data crawls all over the news sites to find our clients, oh also!

Parker: This is the short version?

Hardison: Facial recognition database tied into CIA, NSA and the FBI. But, the real pièce de résistance (changes screens to sports games) DirectTV HD Total Sports Package. NFL, NBA and I threw in a little bit of hockey ‘cause I know you people like that.

Eliot: Hockey.

hardison nests SO HARD

like, bring in all the highest tech into your cozy new office you designed for you and your fellow adopted criminals? heck yeah

- - - - -

Nate: Our client is the cameraman. Corporal Robert Perry. He says that the Castleman contractors spooked and started firing.

Eliot: 5.56 NATO rounds mixed in with some 9 mils from the sub-machine guns. Insurgents would have used AK-47s with 7.62 ammo. It has more of a... (hits the back of his hand to his palm) crack. Contractors shot 'em up all right.

Parker: You ID’d the weapon from the gunshot sound?

Eliot: It has a very distinctive sound

D I S T I N C T I V E

- - - - -

Nate: Yes, and lobbyists in every office in Washington, DC. The problem with a cover-up is all the paperwork it takes to keep the lies straight.

Hardison: Internal emails, memos.

Nate: Exactly.

- - - - -

[Roof]

[Hardison and Parker are wearing black and connected to repelling gear)

Hardison: I gotta go back to the office I just remembered something.

Parker (adjusting Hardison’s harness): What?

Hardison: I just remembered gravity and the squishiness of all my manly bits.

Parker: I designed this rig myself. The line is carbon fiber. Five point harness. Weight support here, here, and here. Auto-breaking resistance on the main pulley back here.

Hardison: Okay cool, so it’s tested?

Parker: Not yet.

Hardison: Not yet? When the hell was you gonna test it?

(Parker pushes Hardison off the roof. She smiles, he screams)

Parker: Big baby.

(she jumps after him. Hardison screams until he stops upside down. Parker lowers herself to his side)

Hardison: Seriously? Seriously

hardison’s first time rappelling decidedly Did Not Go Well

- - - - -

Sophie: My company’s focused on meeting senators, but I’m thinking congressmen.

DuFort: You know the great thing about congressmen? Fifty, a hundred grand well spent will get one elected, but then once they’re in the incumbency rate is over 95 percent so you can get an average 18, 20 years’ use out of one of them. In these uncertain times buying a United States congressman is one of the best investments a corporation can make.

[DuFort’s Office]

Hardison: Oh I just threw up in my mouth a little bit. I’m a professional criminal and I find that disturbing

they’re going at america’s THROAT in this one and I love it. thank you john rogers

- - - - -

(while DuFort is distracted Sophie pulls out his wallet and removes the RFID card with her teeth. DuFort takes off his coat to look at the stain)

I am but a simple gay and this was Hot™

- - - - -

the phones hardison gave the team have six main buttons: internet, text, files, to-do, id scan, and mail

- - - - -

Nate: Parker, what’s the status of the voicelock?

[DuFort’s Office]

Parker: Uh, I’ve been sampling DuFort’s speech but I still need a few more sounds.

[Private Party]

Nate: How many?

[DuFort’s Office]

Parker: Well I only need the sounds puh, tuh, oo, ah, eh, oh, ah, ke, a, ef.

[Private Party]

Nate: Ah, only those. Eliot.

(Eliot walks by carrying two trays of appetizers)

Eliot: I’m on it. Pardon. (approaches Sophie and DuFort) Hello.

Sophie: Ooh. Mmm.

Eliot: (to DuFort) Appetizer, sir?

DuFort: Sure, what do you got?

Eliot: I’ve got the pâté d’escargot avec bière d'Argentine and (looks at second tray and grimaces) what looks like old duck, kind of greasy.

DuFort: I guess I’ll have the first one.

Eliot: Of course.

(Eliot offers him the second tray and Dufort looks at him expectantly)

DuFort: Well? May I have some?

Eliot: The greasy duck?

Sophie: Oh, no, no, no, I wouldn’t have the greasy duck.

Eliot: No I wouldn’t suggest it.

DuFort: No, the other one.

(Eliot pretends confusion)

DuFort: The the pâté d’escargot with the bière d'Argentine!

Eliot: Excellent choice sir (gives DuFort the first tray).

DuFort: (takes food) Who is this clown?

[DuFort’s Office]

Parker: Pretty good. Got most of them. Okay, now all I need is ef, uh and kuh.

[Private Party]

(DuFort spits out the appetizer he has taken)

DuFort: This is shrimp!

Eliot: Very good then. (walks away)

DuFort: It’s shrimp you stupid F----!

[DuFort’s Office]

Parker: Oh, there they are. Really loud too

parker being so competent and knowledgeable about voice activation codes? amazing. iconic.

and the whole scene with eliot and the food? hilarious.

also there already another meta post about this but this scene shows just how SMART eliot is,,, like coming up with that on spot??? don’t get me wrong, hardison is “the smartest man [any of them know]” but damn

- - - - -

continuing list of non-weapon objects eliot uses as weapons:

an IV stand

+ bonus

nate: the defibrillator/AED

- - - - -

Perry: Mr. Ford!

(Perry pushes a defibrillator towards Nate, who grabs the paddles. The first man runs toward Eliot with a knife, but Eliot grabs his arm and pushes him toward Nate)

Nate: Hello.

(Nate hits the man in the chest with the defibrillator paddles and he flies backward, unconscious)

eliot looking Impressed™ at nate for that

- - - - -

Eliot: Play time’s over Nate, it’s only a matter of time before they come after us. The tall one, the way he used a knife, ex-Marine, probably Force Recon.

Hardison: You ID’d a guy off his knife-fighting style?

Eliot: It’s a very distinctive style.

two distinctives in one episode

- - - - -

Hardison: I didn’t sign up for any of this. What I did before, nobody got hurt.

Sophie: I stole paintings for a living.

Parker: I never hurt anybody.

Eliot: I actually hurt people, so…

LMFAO eliot but also- notice that sophie never said that she never hurt people, she just said she stole paintings for a living

- - - - -

Sophie: Nate, if anything had happened to this kid--

Nate: You know you guys called on me. You remember? You begged me to run the crew, agreed to play by my rules. Now walk out if you have a problem with that. Walk out any day if you have a problem with that. It’s simple.

(everyone looks hesitant)

Eliot: We finish this one.

Parker: Just one

PSH like any of y’all believe that

- - - - -

Hardison: How do we hit ‘em?

Sophie: Congressman Jenkins, he’s our in. Looked me straight in the eye and told me he’d never even heard of the shooting.

Parker: So?

Sophie: Looked me in the eye? When men are telling me the truth they’re not looking me in the eye. A man only ever looks a woman in the eye when he’s making the effort to lie to her.

Eliot: ...Well you can’t argue with that.

Hardison: Noted and filed

LMFAO

- - - - -

Nate: All right, Jenkins is DuFort’s pet congressman, let’s see if we can get him to bite. The best way to get two people to reveal a secret, get ‘em to turn on each other.

- - - - -

Sophie: You should look out for the signs congressman. Missed phone calls, no more little favors.

Jenkins: Those are the same signs that your wife is cheating on you.

Sophie: That’s right.

Jenkins: What am I supposed to do when that happens?

Sophie (hands him her card): Play the field

- - - - -

Hardison: Congressman Jenkins is very careful. No direct bribes but he’s renovating his house and so far he’s received over $600,000 worth of work for a little over fifty grand.

(Hardison brings up pictures of Jenkins’ house on the screens)

Eliot: Castleman owns the contracting company, huh?

Hardison: I mean, he’s going through like three shell companies but yeah. And this man loves his house. Just check out his web browsing habits.

(Hardison changes the image to a website for wood panels)

Hardison: Look here, see the man spent three weeks picking out the perfect mahogany wood panels. This site is like wood porn.

Eliot: Is his house finished?

Hardison: Not even close.

Eliot: Can I borrow your phone?

Hardison takes out his phone, dials for Eliot and hands it to him.

Eliot (on phone): Hello? Yes, I’d like to cancel delivery on some mahogany wood paneling. Please.

(Hardison tries to help, Eliot walks away)

Eliot: The Jenkins house. Yeah, you know what, do me a favor man, just go ahead and cancel the whole order. Yes sir.

(Eliot leaves the room as Nate enters with a bowl of popcorn and two beers)

Nate: What’s he doing?

Hardison: Yanking the congressman’s chain

I love chaotic (pre)boyfriends

plus at one point it high hey looked like they were holding hands

and eliot’s SMILE at hardison ,,, you soft man, you never stood a chance

- - - - -

Hardison: A woo--whoa, whoa! A wood-- a wooden box?

Nate: A wooden box.

Hardison: Wood? Well, we can put a man on the moon but all our laws go into a wooden box.

- - - - -

Hardison: I mean, break a law, everybody’s done that, my mama’s done that but steal a law. Oh, she’s gonna be a legend baby.

(on screen, C-SPAN news shows the Senate floor where Parker is walking to “The Hopper”. She waves at the camera and puts the fake bill into box.

Parker: The eagle has landed.

Nate: It’s in!

Hardison: Uhn! Go ahead girl! Sexyness! Unh. Rrrnnn.

Nate: Might want to ease up on that a little bit.

Hardison: Just saying.

Nate: Yeah.

Hardison: Between me and you. Between me and you.

Nate: Never leaves the room.

adorable “the eagle has landed” parker + already-gone-for-her hardison ,,, I love it here

- - - - -

(also, again I am reminded that there is a 250 text block limit so imma have to make a part two and apparently this is my life now)

#leverage #leverage 1.02 #leverage 1x02 #the homecoming job #notable moments #mine #leverage season 1 #season 1

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maugustyniuk · 4 years ago

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What’s in Your Dance Bag—Based on Your Zodiac Sign

Sometimes our dance bags feel like portals to another dimension—we have no idea what half the stuff buried in our bags even is. (Note to self: Clean out dance bag.)

But have you ever wondered if there's a method to the madness? We're pretty sure there is, and as always, we're pretty sure it's something to do with astrology. That's right, your resident Dance Spirit astrologers are back with our best guess at what you keep in your dance bag—based on your zodiac sign.

Aries

You're always going 100 mph Aries (or maybe even more), so it's pretty much a guarantee that your dance bag is fully stocked with snacks to power you through the day. Granola bars, trail mix, yogurt, fruit. It's like a Whole Foods in there.

You've also usually got about six different pairs of shoes in your bag. As an Aries, you love adventure, trying new things and, most of all, a challenge. So when it comes to classes, you're all over the map. Tap, jazz, ballet, character, modern—you'll try them all.

Something else you won't go without? Your signature red lipstick, obv. How else are you going to show off your fiery personality? (And look amazing while doing it, TYSM.)

Taurus

As a child of Venus, you always want to look your best, Taurus. So your dance bag is a hair salon/makeup station, all in one. If your dance besties need to borrow a hair tie, or are looking for a fun accessory to spice up their bun, they know you're the one to go to.

Also important to you? Smelling your best. Taureans love comforting, luxurious scents, so your dance bag is typically equipped with a favorite perfume or deodorant. (Or both.)

But what's most important is the bag itself—admit it, you've been using the same dance bag for years. We get it, Taurus, nobody likes change, and least of all the stubborn bull of the zodiac. But if your dance bag is really starting to smell like feet (or if your bobby pins are starting to slip through the holes in the bottom), you might want to consider investing in a new bag.

Gemini

Gemini, you love to switch it up. So you're pretty much guaranteed to have at least three different dance fits in your bag at any given time. And your dancewear is always on point. You love to keep up with trends and try edgy, new looks.

Ever the intellect, you usually have a book in your bag, as well. You're always making book recs to your fellow dancers, and you refuse to be bored between rehearsals or backstage.

Though you might act carefree, Gemini, we know that at heart, you're ruled by Mercury—and you have more in common with your sister sign Virgo than you'd like to admit. That's why you always have a toothbrush, toothpaste, and some floss in your dance bag. No way you're getting caught with food between your teeth (or bad breath during partnering class).

Cancer

Not to be obvious, but as a water sign, the first and foremost thing a Cancerian keeps in their dance bag? A water bottle, of course. (Preferably a Hydroflask, S'well or any bottle that comes in a fun color.) No dehydration here, please and thank you.

Your dance bag also functions as a de facto vending machine for your dance besties, since you always come prepared with the best snacks, and you're always willing to share. As a bonus, your snacks are almost always homemade, since you're practically a five-star chef.

And while we're wary of zodiac stereotypes, there is a pretty good chance your dance bag is stocked with tissues. And there's no shame in that—because, really, who can get through a performance of Romeo and Juliet without shedding some tears? Props to you for being in touch with your emotions, Cancer.

Leo

We'll state the obvious, Leo. You love to look at yourself, and sometimes the studio mirrors just aren't enough. So, naturally, you always keep a compact mirror in your dance bag, just in case your makeup or your bun needs an extra touch-up.

You also love bright colors, and you're not afraid to wear more daring dancewear than any of your besties. You've usually got a couple of leotards packed in your bag, just in case you need to make a fashion statement, and they're always fun. Bright colors, loud prints, stylish necklines—you'll try anything.

But something not everyone knows about you? You're an amazing friend, and incredibly loyal, Leo. That's why you've usually got something in your bag for your dance bestie, be it her favorite brand of granola bar, a fun sparkly pin for her hair, or a note reminding her she's a star, on and off the stage.

Virgo

You're incredibly hardworking, Virgo, so you've always got the tools for success in your dance bag. TheraBands, foam rollers, tennis balls—you're the one dancer your teacher can always count on to be stretching between classes.

You also love to be prepared, so you've usually got a makeshift first-aid kit in your bag. The thought of suffering a blister or floor burn without the appropriate salves or bandages makes you shudder, and, hey, it's always better to be overprepared, right?

What's most noticeable about your dance bag, though, isn't what's inside of it. It's what it looks like—your bag is pristine. It never smells like feet, and you've got a hard-core system for what you keep in each little zip pocket or compartment. And TBH, all of your dance friends are jealous, though they'd never admit it.

Libra

Like your sister sign Taurus, appearances are important to you, Libra. You like to look good (no shame in that), so your dance bag is always stocked with the essentials: extra hair spray, lip gloss, concealer, bobby pins and a spare leotard, in case you get just a bit too sweaty.

You also love to socialize, so if this were the 1950s, we would say that you always keep your date book in your dance bag. As it is, you always have your phone with you, and it's usually blowing up with texts from your dance besties asking to make plans.

Your dance bag wouldn't be complete without your secret supply of chocolate. But to be clear: This isn't your average Hershey's bar. Libras aren't afraid to indulge, so you keep a bar of luxury dark chocolate tucked away for when the cravings hit.

Scorpio

You can't fool us, Scorpio—the contents of your dance bag aren't some big mystery, like you'd like us all to believe. In fact, they're pretty basic: For starters, you always have a black leotard or two in your bag. After all, black is your signature color.

One thing that isn't in Scorpio's dance bag? Toe pads. You love to look tough, so you'd never be caught dead wearing toe pads with your pointe shoes. However, this does mean you need a hefty supply of Band-Aids for the inevitable blisters.

You also love all things mystical and, dare we say, witchy. You're the Halloween queen of the zodiac, after all! So it's no surprise you always have a crystal or two in the front pocket of your dance bag. Let us guess…moldavite?

Sagittarius

You're an explorer, Sagittarius, and that applies to your dancing. You're always trying new dance styles, and that's reflected in your dance bag. You always have the trappings of your latest obsession in your bag: heeled shoes for ballroom, kneepads for contact improv, sneakers for breaking, the list goes on and on.

But on all of your adventures, there's one consistency: You love making memories. And that means literally—you document everything. At each performance or recital, you're bound to be the one with a Polaroid or disposable camera in your bag, and you can usually be found snapping backstage candids of your dance besties.

Your other favorite form of documenting? Writing it down. You love to learn, so you're always taking notes. You can usually be found after class scribbling down your dance teacher's latest piece of wisdom. Your dance bag is crammed with half-filled notebooks, and you wouldn't have it any other way.

Capricorn

You like to be prepared, Capricorn. And we mean prepared—for every bad scenario imaginable. That's why your dance bag is a mini survival kit. The first Capricorn dance bag guarantee? A stitch kit, of course. Losing a ribbon on your pointe shoe mid-rehearsal is your worst nightmare.

You also always have at least three spare leotards handy. After all, what if you spill something, or get too sweaty or, worst of all, show up to an audition in the same leotard as your dance rival? No, thank you. As a Capricorn, you're expecting the best and preparing for the worst.

Another key to your survival kit? Headphones, so you can drown out the noise around you and focus on your dancing. And before anyone asks, the answer is yes, you have the perfect playlist—for each and every occasion.

Aquarius

Aquarius, you love helping others. That's why it sometimes seems like your dance bag isn't even for you—it's filled with stuff you bring for your friends. Snacks for one dance bestie, Band-Aids for another, and tampons, of course, just in case anyone needs one.

But when it comes to you, you're all about originality. That's why you always have tons of fun accessories in your bag: striped legwarmers, colorful socks, tie-dyed sweats and more than a couple of fun additions to your ballet bun, just to make it a little more interesting.

You're also a rebel at heart, Aquarius, which is why there's usually something in your dance bag that just borders on breaking the rules. Maybe your studio is strictly black leotards only—and yours is gray. Or phones are completely banned—and you just put yours on vibrate. We see you.

Pisces

Like your fellow water sign Cancer, you're big on hydrating during dance class. But as a Pisces, you're a little more imaginative (and a little less practical), meaning you're usually carrying your water in something aesthetically pleasing, like a mason jar, a tumbler, or one of those fancy water bottles with a crystal in the base.

Unlike Cancer, you're a mutable sign, meaning you can adapt to just about any situation. Counterintuitively, this actually means your dance bag is pretty sparse. Unlike other zodiac signs who feel the need to overprepare in case of disaster, you're comfortable in most situations, and your dance bag reflects it. You like the basics, nothing else.

Something most people might not know about you, though, is that you get cold easily. We're not sure why, but it's a Pisces staple. That's why if you keep anything in your dance bag, it's the coziest of warm-ups.

from Dance Spirit https://ift.tt/374Q0P7

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angrylizardjacket · 5 years ago

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nostalgia {Ben Hardy/Reader/Joe Mazzello}

Anon asked: i would love to see a little story or like some headcanons about a lazy day with joe/ben/reader. i feel like that would be really cute.

A/N: 1141 words. Just a fluffy little thing, I hope you like it! I’ve missed them v much.

They love you, and that’s what matters.

The days are long when they aren’t around, long and lonely and sometimes cold; it could be the middle of Summer, but there’s a chill in the air when they aren’t there.

Of course they’re busy, they’re talented and successful, and you’d never begrudge them that, but you... you just like having them around, and that’s not a crime. Sometimes you’re the busy one, and you quietly ache to be in the comfort of their embrace. But such is life, we all do things we don’t want to do, we all learn to go without the ones we love when we must.

Being spread to the far corners of the globe doesn’t feel fair, though. You’re at home, because you work from home, you can film your videos anywhere, but Ben’s on a cathedral roof in Italy judging by his most recent selfie, and Joe’s filming somewhere in the middle of America. There’s calls and video chats but it’s never the same.

Ben invests in some of those bracelets that let each of you feel when one is thinking about the others, a familiar pressure; I’m right here, no matter how far away. It helps.

Or one’s away, and you’re curled up with Ben in your living room and you don’t remember who suggested watching Jurassic Park, but now you just miss Joe more, and it’s four in the morning where he is, but he answers your video call, and sleepily chuckles when you explain what you’re watching. He asks to watch the last half hour, and so you obligingly turn the camera around so he can see the TV, and the phone is tucked neatly between where you’re tangled up with Ben, and something about the way seeing him fall asleep before he gets the chance to hang up is so damn endearing. He wants so badly to be with you both. You know he’s missing you just as much as you’re both missing him.

There’s endless selfies, and recordings that you send each other - Ben air drums when any Queen song comes on the radio, you do funny voices when washing up, making up a whole storyline for the cutlery, something about the mafia and needing to waterboard them for information - it’s kinda dark, but also funny, and it makes both Ben and Joe smile. Joe sends you guys a video of himself talking to a home made sock puppet, asking it if he should come home early, because he misses you both. The sock puppet reminds him that he’s under contract, and that it’s only for a few more weeks. The video still makes you cry.

When it’s you and Joe, there’s videos sent of the pair of you scouring the internet for Ben’s episodes of East Enders, and arguing about if the shady streaming site will give your laptop a virus. You kiss Joe to shut him up. Ben’s answering photo is of himself, on set, half blushing and covering his smile with his hand, captioned that there’s a USB in his desk drawer with a few episodes on it. He seems embarrassed but endeared. He also gets photos of you pouting with Cardboard Ben, ‘it’s just not the same’ you message, and he sends back ‘good, i don’t want him stealing you guys from me’.

“Is it hard always being away from your... your partners?” The interviewers always flounder when they talk to any of you about your relationship, but you’ve all learned to navigate it. Joe flushes and ducks his gaze, smiling a little.

“It’s always hard, but we’re all in the same industry so we all kind of understand; we’ve got this thing we do, we watch old stuff that the others have been in, when we’re away, like the other day, Y/N and Ben sent me a video of them watching Undrafted, it was really sweet actually,” he admits, and the interviewer coos at that, asking him what he’d watched recently, “well,” Joe starts with an embarrassed little smile, “don’t tell her I do this, but I go back and I watch The Boyfriend Tag video on Y/N’s youtube channel that we did; I dunno, it just makes me all warm and fuzzy,” he flusters a little.

You have that interview downloaded and saved onto your phone.

It’s hard being away from each other, but it makes it all the sweeter being back together.

Ben and Joe surprise you at the airport after you get back from London Fashion Week, holding a sign with your name in big, block letters, and yeah it kind of attracts a crowd, but it’s the thought that counts. They’re peppering you with questions, asking you what your favourite outfit was, what your favourite moment was, if you stayed at a nice hotel.

“Can’t be better than our place,” Joe snorted, and he’s got his arm around your shoulders in the back of the Uber, and you smile, lean into him, press your nose to his cheek.

“Never.”

“Oi, don’t knock London, man,” Ben makes a point of seeming annoyed, but Joe rolls his eyes with a smile.

“Babe,” he tells Ben, “no hotel will ever compare to your flat either, okay? I’m saying that anywhere’s better when we’re together.” And Ben wears a little pleased grin, and presses a kiss to Joe’s knuckles, sitting on your other side.

And it’s warm, even though the air outside is cold, between them you are warm. Of course you are, wherever they are, you find comfort.

Together, you watch everything and nothing, and you read scripts to help each other learn lines, and record auditions, and they record videos with you, and this is the best feeling in the world. Laughter, bright and loud and warm, fills the halls of your home.

Ben joins in when you interrogate the dishes now, drying them, pretending to threaten their family, just because it makes Joe cackle with laughter.

Joe finally watched Jurassic Park with you both, providing dry commentary about the behind the scenes during the entire time, which has you and Ben in stitches half the time.

And you come home from a walk, only to find Ben and Joe trying to copy one of your makeup tutorials from when you’d first started YouTube. The sight warms your heart and almost moves you to tears, right before you hear your own voice from your youth, and you almost screech trying to shut the laptop, while the boys shout that they’re halfway through.

“You’re killing me,” you give a fondly exasperated smile, only wincing a little at the jarring jump cut in the video, and they both beam in response.

“But you love us,” Ben practically sings, and you roll your eyes, even though you can’t help but grin.

Yeah, you really do.

#ben hardy #joe mazzello #ben hardy imagine #joe mazzello imagine #joe mazzello x reader #ben hardy x reader #ben hardy x joe mazzello #ben hardy x joe mazzello x reader #ben x reader x joe #brj #the angry lizard writes #bohemian rhapsody #bohemian rhapsody cast

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yoyoplisetsky · 8 years ago

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I sort of kind of forgot to put this up last week, which is a shame, because I’ve been reading a lot (working through my “tabs of shame”), so this is this week and last week’s list. I want everyone to have lots of good fics to read, so I figured a few weeks ago I’d make a list to suggest the ones I liked. Have any suggestions for me or want to talk to me about them? Pls pls hit me up, I’m very friendly.

What I Read This Week (~6/3-6/17)

faking in secret (Ch. 1) - DefiantDreams - It gets kind of difficult when you’re simultaneously fake dating and dating in secret at the same time. Yuuri and Viktor make it work—until they don’t. (My review: Fake/secret dating au in which essa slays me again. love this!! can’t wait for more)

It’s a Sign - LittleLostStar - Five times Victor and Yuuri escalate the Silly Signs Held Up At Airport Arrival Terminals War, and one time Victor wins without using a sign at all. (My review: This is such a precious fic. Star always does the characters so well and they’re just... so cute. <3)

we’ll always have paris (Ch. 1-2) - spookyfoot - Or: the canon divergent au where Yuuri doesn't screw up Japanese Nationals, runs into Victor in the Paris airport on the way to Worlds in Sweden, and somehow embarasses himself into a relationship on the 18 hour train ride between Paris and Malmö. (My review: Wow, spooky, can you believe I finally read this? No, but, jokes aside, Paris is hilarious, and I’m so glad I’ve finally started it!!)

feel like a quote out of context (Ch. 1-3) - seventhstar - In which Yuuri accidentally insults Viktor Nikiforov in front of a crowd of reporters, only to discover that apparently being called a 'talentless hack' is what turns Viktor on. This is not how Yuuri envisioned meeting Viktor going, but hey. He'll take it. (My review: another tab of shame fic oops. Nuriiiiiii, I am so glad that I’m finally reading soft rivals, i totally understand why you love it)

Night is Young and the Music’s High - opalish - "Best press conference ever," the Japanese Nationals silver medalist says when asked. “Ten out of ten, would medal again.” "I would die for Katsuki-kun," Minami declares, with terrifying sincerity. (My review: Someone recced me this fic and I laughed the whole time I was reading it. It’s great)

God Save Yuuri Katsuki (Ch. 1-2) - belovedyuuri (casinthongs) - Let it be known that accepting the babysitting gig is definitely not the best decision in Yuuri's life. At first, at least. (My review: Ahhh, basia, i don’t know if i’ve read anything by you before, but this is great. i love yuri as a child, he’s going to kill those poor adults. i love them)

Double Vicked - Phayte - The new Fan Art came out --- Two Victor's in it! Well... Here is Yuuri being Double Dicked (Vicked) - Victor has a younger brother that looks identical to him, when he was younger --- Yuuri cannot stop lusting after him. (I put incest warning on this, but they Nikiforov brother's DON'T TOUCH each other) (My review: so, i was looking for viktor/yuuri/viktor, but i got this. it’s very well written, and close enough to that trope that i loved it.)

Midnight Salchow - Mhalachai - Yuuri is convinced he has hidden his shameful past as a writer of Viktor Nikiforov RPF. Yuuri is mistaken. (My review: i love social media fics and mistaken identities, so this thing was right up my alley, i cried laughing.)

Green - MemeKonYOI (MemeKonYA) - Yuuri has no ex partners, but he has Yuuko and Phichit, and people he describes to him as ‘lovers, I guess?’ with a sheepish expression over dinners and drinks and in hotel rooms where they’re staying together. He has kids like Minami and Yurio, with huge crushes, wanting to skate on the same ice as him, to be his equals. (My review: ahhh, another fic someone recced to me, and I adored it. It was precious, and I love oblivious heartbreaker Yuuri. Love him)

Talk To Me - Wivania - “So… You didn’t buy the Yurio needs a new phone excuse and I shouldn’t consider a career in acting after all?” or Yuuri speaks more Russian than Viktor expected. (My review: ahh, i’ve had this in my marked for later for a while now, and i loved it!!! such a cute fic of misunderstanding)

get me through the night - FullmetalChords - Victor has learned to sleep in strange places, on benches at Yubileyny, on sticky floors at the Olympic Village. He cannot, however, sleep through an endless swarm of angry hornets, not when he is sharing a bed with it. Five annoying sleep habits Yuuri and Victor have, and one time they couldn't get to sleep without it. (My review: Meggggg, this fic is also super precious oh my god I died laughing Viktor and Yuuri are so extra and they’re 100% like this thank you)

The great debate ends.. - aim7art - Viktor launches the pineapple pizza fiasco, & Yuuri's finally had enough of it~ (My review: Man, the one time i’m not on Viktor’s side for something - I love pineapple on pizza. But this was hilarious - I loved the taps to social media in it, too)

(Don’t) Ring the Wedding Bells (Ch. 1) - cuttlemefish - As (loosely) inspired by real life, this is the wedding reception AU (you didn’t ask for, but will get) in which Yuuri Katsuki catches the bride’s bouquet and (shortly after) gets smashed at a wedding reception, then dirty dances with his best friend, (sort of) seduces a (hot) platinum-haired trust-fund baby named Viktor, and ends up being hounded for his identity (by said trust-fund baby and his friends and family) on social media. (My review: tabs of shame! tabs of shame! Z, this is super cute, and I can’t wait to continue. I hear there’s a moose in store? ;))

drunk in love - spookyfoot - Victor runs a bar, Yuuri is his favorite customer. (My review: spooky, back at it again with these super cute hilarious aus. a+ spooky, a+)

What I Wrote This Week (~6/3-6/17)

off the cliff - Right before Finals, Yuuri Katsuki breaks up with Viktor, because he needs to "go home". But then Viktor catches Yuuri riding toward a dangerous cliff, where no one would dare go for recreational purposes. But Yuuri wasn't lying, he was going home. (Or: Crack was requested and I gave an angsty mermaid au)

i will go down with this ship! (Ch. 2) - Yuuri and Viktor co-star in the fantasy drama History Makers, a show where their characters Mamoru and Dimitry are shipped by all the fans, which of course leads to the fact that fans also ship Yuuri and Viktor. And write fic about it. Yuuri reads RPF by only one author, therealviknik, and leaves a comment on every single one with his account, katsukiforov. Some fans pick up on the conversations and begin to ship therealviknik with katsukiforov as well. Phichit ships it all. (Or: Fandom fic where Yuuri reads fanfiction about him and Viktor that Viktor writes but neither of them know and I’m really invested in like 3 ships and they’re all the same people)

the one i'll slay; the other slayeth me - When he moves to America, Yuuri auditions to be part of an on-ice production of Midsummer Night's Dream. He finds out that the show stars Viktor Nikiforov, and is shocked, excited and scared by that, because Viktor is his long time crush and idol. It doesn't just end there, though, because it seems the magic isn't just within the show, and there isn't just one Viktor. (Or: D O U B L E VI K TO R VYV do i need to say more?)

#yoi fic rec #yuri on ice #yoi fic #fic rec #yuri on ice fic rec #thishasbeencary #my fic

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possessed-by-wincest · 8 years ago

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Ballet Boy- Unrelated Wincest Fanfiction

Summary: Sam has been doing ballet since the age of 3 but he hasn't told his boyfriend yet in fear of how he'd react. However, Dean finds out on his own. --- He tied the ribbons of his pointe shoes easily, the familiar feeling of the material snaking up his ankles reminding him that this is where he belonged. The baby pink satin shone against the bright lights in the studio as he flexed his feet and began stretching. His toes clicked slightly, reminding him that he shouldn't wait so long between sessions. He'd been dancing since he was 3 years old and, despite peer pressure and bullying throughout his whole teenage life, he had never given up. He just felt right when he had his shoes on and could move his body in ways that most people couldn't dream of. It was stress relief, it was a hobby, it was his whole life. He rose, gracefully; the beautiful pointe shoes somehow changing him from a clumsy puppy to a poised eagle. By the barre he practiced a few of his basic moves, his Pliés and Elevés. It just returned him back to the ballet mindset where every move had a purpose and he could carry it out with precision. He hopped up en pointe and stretched his arm down in a sweeping motion as the music flowed through his lean and muscular body. Whoever labelled ballet a wussy's activity was 100% wrong. Did they not know how much strength and flexibility goes into every move and besides, who else can take their whole body weight on a single toe? He sighed to himself. Despite everything he still hadn't been able to buck up the courage to tell his boyfriend about his favorite hobby. Dean was kind of super masculine and shied away from anything that would damage his male reputation. Finding out that Sam did ballet at a top level several times a week was not going to go down well... or so he assumed. He'd never even mentioned ballet around the other man in the fear something would slip out. "Focus." He whispered to himself, it echoed around the studio. He tried to shake his mind off the topic but recently his thoughts during training had revolved around Dean Winchester. He'd have to tell the man eventually as he'd been considering auditioning for the New York Ballet Company or maybe even going across seas for Paris Opera Ballet or the Royal Ballet in England. He'd inevitably have to inform Dean if it got that far. His current instructor was one of the best in the US and she believed he had a chance at getting accepted. Even the thought if it thrilled him. He focused on his footing as he crossed the room, moving like the wind. He dipped down, feeling the slight pull on his thigh muscles. Sam stretched up high in time with the music. This had always been his favorite piece to warm up to even when his skill level exceeded what it could provide. He ran and leapt. Legs stretched far apart, breeze ruffling his hair, muscles poised and tight. He landed with the softest of thumps for years of practice. He couldn't stop the grin that was forming across his lips. Maybe if he pushed himself to his limit then his mind would leave Dean behind and instead get entangled with the performance and perfection of the art. He breathed heavily as he did pirouette after pirouette, spotting to keep his head always in the same direction. His body was liquid, moving to the vibration of music. He had no mental control; it was all physical. --- The studio door clicked behind him but the noise was largely masked by the loud classical music drifting from the huge speakers. Then he saw Sam. His boyfriend was in a leotard, tights and pink ballet shoes. This had to be a joke... Dean had followed behind his boyfriend for a while when he noticed Sam had left his keys on the table. He hung back however when the taller male slipped into some random dance school that Dean had never noticed before. He waited a while for Sam to come out and continue heading towards the gym but he didn't. Why was Sam there? Was he cheating on Dean with a dancer? It seemed unlikely but he'd leant never to rule out the impossible. He entered the school a few minutes later and headed along the corridors, checking in each window for Sam, eventually finding him. His partner was so entranced in the music that Dean stood there for a few minutes merely watching until Sam jumped, hand over his heart. "Dean! Christ, you scared me!" He chuckled slightly as the tension released from his muscles. "What is this?" Dean demanded, ignoring Sam's comment to instead gesture at his pink shoes and tight leotard. "... Ballet." The taller man offered uncertainly. "I can see that." He rubbed a hand over his face, "Why didn't you tell me about it?" Sam carded his fingers through his hair anxiously, "I didn't want you to get embarrassed and leave." Honesty. "Embarrassed? Sam, why would I get embarrassed?" His green eyes met Sam's hazel. There was a beat of silence between them but the classical music surrounding the two men was reaching its very climax. Sam needed time to organize his thoughts in a way that wouldn't offend his boyfriend. "Ballet, it's... not seen as the most masculine thing to do and I know you are conscious of how people look at us anyway for being together." Tears began to slip down his cheeks, "I wanted to tell you but I didn't want to have to choose between you or it." Dean looked heartbroken that he'd put Sam though such turmoil, "Sam, I love you and I can tell this means so much to you. I could never make you choose! Yes, I'm aware of what people say about us but why would sacrificing this and making you miserable make that any better? I'd prefer you happy and with me than anything else. And besides, you're absolutely incredible!" Sam blushed at the compliment but fell into his partner's arms when he was pulled into a tight embrace. "I love you, Sammy." Dean whispered against his hair. "I love you too, Dean." The elder separated them slightly so he could peer into the hopeful face, "Now, why don't you show me what you can do. The amount you sneak off to practice must mean you're good!" Sam grinned and stepped back. --- Moments later, Dean is leaning against the barre as he watches Sam leap and twirl around the room with utmost skill and dexterity. His talent and dedication bleeding through in each move, highlighting the time Sam had invested into his art. Dean was happy. He could make out the smile plastered across his partner's lips too and knew that this reveal was just the start of something amazing for them.

#wincest #wincest fanfic #fanfiction #supernatural #spn #unrelated wincest #ballet sam #ballet #dancer Sam #my story #dean winchester #sam winchester

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douglassmiith · 5 years ago

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Google Adds New Features to Bolster Local Businesses Covid-19 Recovery

Last week, Google announced it was releasing a whole host of new or updated features in an effort to support local businesses’ recovery after Covid-19.

This shouldn’t come as too much of a surprise, given how reactive Google My Business has been throughout the entire Covid-19 pandemic — including the temporary restriction of features such as reviews and Q&A, providing new attributes like ‘curbside delivery’, and incorporating integrations with sites like GoFundMe.

Arguably though, this is Google’s biggest response to the real-world consequences on local brick-and-mortar stores presented by Covid-19 yet.

On Wednesday, June 17, Google released its ‘Helping businesses and nonprofits recover’ resources. So, what were the main headlines?

International Small Business Week

First and foremost it looks like we ought to wish you a very happy Small Business Week!

Along with the introduction of new features, Google also announced it was declaring the week of June 22nd to June 27th as International Small Business Week:

Helping businesses and organizations recover is the first topic we’ll explore. Today we’re sharing updates for small businesses ahead of a Google-wide initiative, International Small Business Week, taking place June 22-27. This is a week dedicated to celebrating small businesses when we’ll share tips, trainings and products to help them get back on their feet.

Google didn’t go into a huge amount of detail about what this week might entail, but it looks like you ought to keep your eyes peeled for unique tips and tricks from the search engine giants.

This may not be the most exciting news for our US-based readers, as National Small Business Week already exists in the States.

Nonetheless, this week provides an opportunity to celebrate the small, local businesses that are cornerstones of communities and economies across the world.

After a pretty turbulent past few months, let’s take this moment to say a big old “thank you” to the businesses that have persevered, adapted, and pivoted to continue to serve us and those most in need.

It may be some time before all local businesses are able to return to (relative) normality and for those unable to adapt to the recent restrictions, this will have been an even tougher time.

It wasn’t easy, but we’re grateful, and we’re ready to support you while you get back on your feet.

New features and tools

The long and short of Google’s announcement is that it’s helping local businesses largely in regards to ads.

These newly announced features are designed to support local businesses as they begin to reopen and return to “business as usual” — whatever that may look like.

Book directly in the SERPs -> Google is now making it easier to book local services directly in Google Search on mobile in the U.S.

Also, the Shopping tab will show local store info starting today (for all countries where the tab is available): https://t.co/q6s5HrD0ke pic.twitter.com/w2QdwBwvPI

— Glenn Gabe (@glenngabe) June 17, 2020

Although Google has packaged these features up into one handy “for local businesses” announcement, it looks like some of the capabilities have been in play for a few weeks, if not longer.

Regardless, below we’ve compiled the list of “new” features that local businesses will be able to make use of from now on:

Changes to Google’s Shopping tab

The shopping tab will feature local store information from Google My Business, such as product availability, locations, and other options like dine-in or curbside pickup.

New processes and capabilities for Local Service Ads

Google also took a look back at its recent change to Local Service Ads on mobile.

As of May, users can also now book appointments directly from clicking on a Local Service Ad — this expands on the previous functionality of sending messages to hot leads.

To enable direct bookings, businesses will need to liaise with one of Google’s many booking partners. Businesses will also need to have been approved by Google’s guarantee consumer protection program.

Smart campaigns reach more countries

Google’s Smart campaigns have long been a way for less technically savvy or under-resourced businesses to set up ad campaigns with a clear goal in mind, such as wanting more phone calls, website clicks, or bookings.

Now, Google is expanding its ‘Smart campaigns’ to 150 countries.

It will also be more accessible than ever, as Google allows users to quickly set up campaigns through its Ads app.

Free promoted pins

In addition to expanding Smart campaigns to more countries, businesses that use Smart campaigns will now benefit from promoted pins on Google Maps for free.

Source: Google

Promoted pins provide businesses with more visibility. Usually, advertisers would be charged for each click on a promoted pin (just like your classic PPC campaigns), but if a business has a Smart campaign running, there will be no cost per click.

With this in mind, Smart campaigns may sound like the ideal fit for local businesses, but some experts have been critical of their appearance:

I think the square does the business more harm than good, visually. To me the square makes it feel like it’s representing something that is not a business, because it’s different from all the other businesses. pic.twitter.com/2ToJX1UX8c

— Colan Nielsen (@ColanNielsen) June 19, 2020

Increased functionality from ‘Grow My Store’

Google’s ‘Grow My Store’ website has been updated to help businesses boost their success rates online and in-store, depending on the business’s specific industry.

Once you’ve entered all your relevant business information and signed up for a profile, Google will provide you with a full report complete with industry benchmarks, such as how many users have used a Google Product and more.

The report can take up to a few hours to run, but I was pleasantly surprised that mine took around thirty minutes or so.

In this next section, we’ll take a look at exactly what the ‘Grow My Store’ report gives you.

What’s in the ‘Grow My Store’ report?

While most of the features listed above are fairly self-explanatory, one thing you may want to know more about is the ‘Grow My Store’ report. ‘Grow My Store’ has been available to users in most of Europe since last year but is brand-new to US users.

Here, we’ll take a look at what’s included, using an example of a local Brighton (UK) restaurant.

The first thing you’ll see in your report is a website score, pictured below.

Next, Google provides a breakdown of the results across six main categories: product information, store details, personalization, customer service, security, and mobile.

The product information section unpacks product details, product reviews/ratings, product search, and product prices.

Unfortunately, while you do get a more detailed score at the top of the report, these sections simply show a tick or a cross.

So if you have product ratings/reviews, even if they’re not well optimized or executed well, you will receive a tick. If you don’t have any, for whatever reason, you will receive a cross. It’s no indication of how successfully you’re performing the task.

Next, the store details section shows how clearly you’ve presented information about your store, including opening hours, directions, and geolocation.

Looking at the personalization section shows if your site enables users to create personalized accounts and wishlists or favorites.

Customer service is also factored in, showing the success of elements like contact phone, live chat, returns policy, and social media.

The security section is fairly basic, and simply gives a tick or cross depending on whether or not your site is HTTPS secure.

Then finally, the report reflects mobile support, including mobile speed and mobile-friendliness.

You can check how friendly your site is on mobile with Google’s mobile-friendly test tool, and compare your mobile site speed with ‘Test My Site’ to benefit from further suggestions.

Though this report is certainly helpful and provides local businesses with some simple steps to improve their online presence, it could be argued that it limits the initial role of agencies in pitching to SMB clients.

Even though it’s a fairly basic report and very Google-focussed, the ‘Grow My Store’ tool does replace a very basic site audit, meaning agencies wouldn’t need to provide this service at a cost.

That said, in times like these, providing under-resourced local businesses with free tools to increase their visibility can hardly be a bad thing.

What does the industry think?

Whenever some big news update occurs in the world of local SEO Company, we like to take a look at how the industry has reacted. So, what do local SEO Companys think of Google’s new features?

Well, interestingly, the local SEO Company community has been very quiet on the matter, and conversation across social media and local SEO forums seemed to be lacking.

Most likely, this could be attributed to the fact that local SEO Companys have been aware of these feature updates coming out in dribs and drabs, and simply reacted at the time — so Google’s “announcement”, as it were, wouldn’t have caused quite such a stir.

What do these updates mean for local businesses?

For local businesses, it’s certainly worth bearing these new features and updates in mind. But if you’re not planning to invest in Google Ads any time soon, then these may not be of much consequence.

That said, I would recommend running a ‘Grow My Store’ report — it’s always worth checking out whether or not you could be taking simple steps to improve your online presence, especially when the tool is free.

What do you think of Google’s latest changes? Will they help local businesses recover in a post-Covid-19 world? Does ‘Grow My Store’ pose a threat to agencies? Let us know your thoughts in the comments below!

The post Google Adds New Features to Bolster Local Businesses Covid-19 Recovery appeared first on BrightLocal.

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riichardwilson · 5 years ago