#*code name for this writing project. it's not a very clever one

[bellshazes]

i'm going to beat dark souls 3* tonight

[piratekane]

i got an ask in my email that never showed up in my inbox that was basically looking for book recs and since only one person asked for my opinion and because this was the year i fell back in love with reading, i'm going to do a myspace Top 8 books i loved this year, in no particular order:

Code Name Verity by Elizabeth Wein this is basically a love story. it's a love story and you won't change my mind. i don't mean romantic love except that i mean best friends loving each other to and through the end of the world can be romantic and we should say that more often. because this a book about war and its terrors but it's also the love story between two best friends and what they'll do to get back to each other. it has probably one of my favorite protagonists ever - actually, two of my favorites. Wein tells a devastatingly perfect story and i promise your heart will swell and sink and tie itself into tiny knots. kiss me, hardy! kiss me quick! 5 stars, i cried at the end

Six of Crows by Leigh Bardugo i was late to the SoC books and boy am i glad i finally showed up to the party. this book was perfection. i immediately fell in love with each crow and spent the whole book screaming that if nina and matthias didn't kiss ASAP that i was going to throw something. i also was yelling about kaz and inez, do not think i was not doing that. kex brekker you deserve love you street rat. @dealanexmachina had to deal with the screaming through this. and i think it's going to be a repeat read in 2024 just so i can experience the care and craftsmanship that went into each character, their nuances, and how it wove perfectly together into kaz's brilliant plan. 5 stars, i immediately read the sequel like a hungry jaugar hunting down a person wearing that calvin klein scent

Tress of the Emerald Sea by Brandon Sanderson brando sando is... prolific. and it was overwhelming to jump in, but i started with tress and not any of his other books (a problem i have rectified) and what a bang it was. this book is, in a word, hilarious. the narrator is a fantastical being with an aversion to linear thought and a predilection for hilarity. the humor in this book is unlike any of sandos other work and really shows that he has the ability to stretch. the premise is very clever and very cool and just very fun. tress is brave and smart and that's celebrated, not punished. plus who doesn't love a talking rat? i'm looking forward to his other secret projects 4.5 stars, the narrator is my favorite sando character

Hidden Pictures by Jason Rekulak okay, this is billed as horror, but i wouldn't really say horror and would lean more into the mystery billing than anything. maybe thriller. and it's outside my usual genre and is definitely more suited to my wife's tastes but she finished this book in three days (and usually takes 3 weeks-to-months to finish books) and when she said i had to read it, i said yes dear and picked it up. i'm glad i did. it's an illustrated mystery and as the author writes in the notes, those who pay attention will be rewarded. the ending was a twist i didn't see coming, like, at all. and it was clever. but once the ending started to unfold it was a mad dash to the finish. 5 stars, my wife recommends this

The Nevernight Chronicles by Jay Kristoff now, i know. this is actually 3 books, not 1. but hear me out - they must all be read. it's nonnegotiable. these books were recommended by tumblr user @fiddleabout and am i so very glad they were. mia is unhinged. there's no other way to put that. the girl is fucking off. her. rocker. and no one in her life is any better. they're all just as freaking crazy. but they're my crazy comfort killers. i went on for hours about mia and ash, to the point that my wife shut the bathroom door in my face because i tried to follow her in there talking about them. this series is bloody and more than once i was like, he can't possibly make this any bloodier but he CAN and i think this book is better for it. found family, check. unhinged teenage protagonist, double check. endless fun, check in triplicate. 4.5 stars, i am never not thinking of ash and her vision of a house on a lake and softness

A Day of Fallen Night by Samantha Shannon obviously i read priory first and obviously i loved it but ADoFN was... mind-blowing. maybe because priory enriched the world of ADoFN and i was already familiar with all the intricacies of it (though there was certainly more to learn) but reading this just... the bridging Shannon did, the connections she made between priory and ADoFN and how we ultimately saw the way ADoFN threaded some of the loops we saw closing in priory, it blew my mind. the utter romance of it all, my god. i read this monster book in a single day, i couldn't put it down. i emerged from my ADoFN cocoon like andy samberg in that one SNL skit where he plays a teenager who just woke up. i was changed(TM) 5 stars, i was a changed man

Rule of Wolves by Leigh Bardugo i immediately jumped into the rest of the Leigh's work (i went through SaB first but she's so strong at the end of this Grishaverse) and while i love all my SoC babes, nina was a favorite and honestly i'd recommend both King of Scars and this book. tumblr user fiddleabout was blessed to follow along with my completely unhinged livestream of this book and when (spoiler) zoya and nikolai finally got over themselves and K I S S E D, i put the book down and took a lap. then i picked it up and screamed again as nina's arc unfolded. 5 stars, i have a lot of thoughts about the kind of man nikolai is (peg)

The Adventures of Amina Al-Sirafi by S.A. Chakraborty i'm a bit of a sucker for a pirate book. even more of a sucker about a woman pirate, and amina is a woman pirate of the highest caliber. this book is either intentionally funny or unintentionally hilarious. amina's biggest flaw is that she's constantly ogling her demon ex-husband's cute butt - honest to god. otherwise, she's perfection. badass, scrappy, jacked. amina is all of those things and then some. so she has a bit of a past that winds up coming back to bite her in the ass and then she's thrust back onto a ship where she has to chase down an old crewmate's daughter - can you blame a girl for being the most kickass pirate in all of the seas? no! should you? absolutely not! just let amina live out her life ogling ass and sailing leisurely, please. 4.5 stars, i want to sail on amina's ship even though i'm afraid of boats. and the ocean. and things living in the ocean. and generally the water.

( ͡❛ ᴗ ͡❛)👍 and now you know, cause it's mike's pirate's super short show! ( ͡❛ ᴗ ͡❛)👍

[serendertothesquad]

Seren's Studies: Odd Squad UK -- "Odd Jubilee" Episode Followup, Part 2

And on to Part 2 we march! Will Precinct 97531 get their party? Let's find out below the break!

I honestly can't decide if this guy's part of Animal Control or if he's a trash collector.

Given the context, I'll assume the latter...but when I saw the grabbers my mind went to ACO.

LMAO EVEN T H E Y HATE ERRANDS JUST AS MUCH AS I DO. Bless them. This is the right reaction.

Clearly Alexander Shaw's talent doesn't lie so much in singing as Asha Soetan's talent lies in dancing.

That being said, it's not the most egregious use of AutoTune this franchise has had. The end of "Double O Trouble" takes the rotten cake on that.

(Post-edit note: "The Sandwich Project". Not "Double O Trouble". I was mistaken.)

"This would sound so much better as a Vocaloid song."

-- These two, probably

THE CHEF IS A HAIRSTYLIST?!?!?!

THIS MAN?!?!?!?

T H I S M A N ?!?!?!!?!?!?

I'm not even fucking mad, I'm downright amazed. Where was this non-crippling-overspecialization for Oksana and Olly, hehh???

"Noooo, nooooo. We were, uh...talking about...bathroom stalls. They're not up to ground-reaching code. We have to fix them."

Awwww fuaaaaaaaack, they Miku'd and Kaito'd the damn big shoes!!!

First time hearing the catchphrase and it's a mere "Iiiiit's Orli."

Which, if I think about it like she's watched The Shining a lot, makes it acceptable.

he always spills it down himself

he hasn't been seen with any smoothie stains the entire episode

I get continuity is hardly a thing with this franchise, but can we get a little scene-by-scene consistency? Is that so hard to do or are they stu-

...Well fuck. Clever Chekhov's Gun. I didn't even notice that, and that's saying something!

Did...did he go to sleep with his suit and the key on? Does the De-Saturday-inator change clothes in addition to ridding the victim of the Saturdays? Does it also give them important things like accessories and keys?

I just...I need to know the rules. I'm not cheating. I just wanna know.

Yeah, y'know, I read "Party Agents arrive with a party box" and didn't expect anything less than "party stuff shoots out of a box".

"I guess I knew my partner better than I realized."

This would have been a pretty nice lesson for "O is for Opposite", if Olympia, Otis, and Oona wanted to get to know Oprah better. Problem is, that episode is smack in the middle of the season and that episode isn't about getting to know Oprah better so much as it's about rectifying her mistake.

Ah well, another one for the rewrite pile.

Everything...oh God...everything was going so well until this guy went from smooth dancing to janky shit.

I'm crying, dear God. It's such a beautiful mess.

Putting aside that we have a very awkward cutoff ending in line with what this franchise tends to have...and it's definitely one of the more awkward cutoffs...your credits for this episode. The garbageman/ACO/whatever guy is named Louis, I suppose. Good to know.

---------------------------

Overall, this was an okay episode. I enjoyed it a lot better than "A Dish Served Odd" before it, even if the song was a little...nyehhhh. Wasn't what I expected, but it was decent enough. I'd say "too much AutoTune" but that might be more of a Shaw problem than an editor problem.

Maybe I missed it somewhere in the episode, but I hear Orli's been working at the UK precinct for three months by this point, which is incredibly unrealistic for a 12-episode season. Anime doesn't even have that big of a time gap, not until the end of the show. On top of that, if Orli doesn't know all these things about Ozzie three months in, that's...not a sign of good chemistry between them! At the very least, Olympia had a good idea of what Otis liked a little ways into Season 2, even though there was no definitive timeframe in between, say, "First Day" and "Happy Halfiversary". My guess is that I can chalk it up to Paul also needing to find his footing with this series, though his writing was pretty solid for this episode.

But anyway. With that aside, next followup will be for "The New Ozzie", which also faces a similar problem with the whole "three months" thing. Make it make sense, please, while I at least try to not have a stick up the butt for it.

Seren out!

[violetvirus]

DUDE, YOUR AU IS SO COOLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!

trying to think of AU names. i should be studying but. IT'S COOL

tell me about Ao Lie. and Wukong, and his programming backstory. and why Tripitaka is in trouble with the government. and Nezha (obviously, as aroacenezha LMAO). i wanna know everything about that angry little cyberpunk guy. what's his junkyard look like? have any Ao Lie/Nezha spats? is he a main-ish character?

and how does this translate w/ the og story of JTTW? is this just a character idea kind of thing, or some ideas about the scrolls and journey to enlightenment?

look. you put out cool idea and now I will not stop talking. <3

AAAAAHAH THANK YOU!! yeah… not sure what i should name it yet agh…. But I'm sure i'll think of something more clever than cyberpunk jttw! eventually…

rubs hands together lets get to it heheh

ao lie and tripitaka's relationship is one of my favs to draw and write about currently, they both lean on each other super hard for support bc at their core they're both so lonely yet unable to reach out for help. ao lie often has tripitaka pick him up from parties or other events. their friendship has only stayed so strong because ao lie is so insistent that he would get to know the shut off tripitaka.

wukong's old programming was a secret project from the jade city government to raze areas marked as "undesirable" from the city. this is mostly places where resentment towards the government is growing, and poor areas. wukong's original programming was violent and obedient, he had no personality of his own and his only goal was to carry out the current command. but because of this, it was easier for tripitaka to rewire him, as robots with no set personality code can more easily be reprogrammed, as they're almost a blank slate.

ao lie and wukong… used to not like each other. at all.

but one night, they got the chance to actually talk to just each other. and after that, they became much friendlier to one another. i want to make a comic based off this so i can't say much for now…

tripitaka is in trouble with the government because he is against it. jade city's government is corrupt and ripe with nepotism. they try and lock out technology from reaching poor areas. so tripitaka builds and creates, so that the defenseless can defend themselves. tripitaka is technically an illegal citizen, nobody is really sure where he's from and he has no official papers stating he is a citizen of jade city. but he's been living in the slums since he was very young. tripitaka also gets into trouble for breaking and entering and trespassing, as he will sometimes need materials that aren't available on the black market and will take matters into his own hands. tripitaka can be a little badass, as a treat. (but i love book tripitaka too)

though this tripitaka is still a strict pacifist, so his crimes are all non-violent.

nezha!! little nezha thinks he looks very badass, but everyone else wonders… who the hell is dressing this kid LOL. nezha has first hand experienced the inequality of jade city from living in the slums and has becomes extremely protective over the people there. just on the outskirts of his town there is a junkyard he frequents. tripitaka goes there often too, for scrap metal, and sometimes nezha will bring him materials (if tripitaka asks nicely, lmao). when wukong was first sent to raze their town, nezha was able to pin him under steel pipes in the junkyard, making it so tripitaka could reprogram him. nezha is still extremely proud of this. im making a comic based on this moment….

nezha often will enter tripitaka's home without warning, so the first time he entered with ao lie there, he assumed the worst and jumped to defend tripitaka. ao lie found it hilarious and adorable. ao lie doesn't take nezha very seriously and reminds him often that he has no part in what his family does as he was disowned, but nezha is convinced otherwise and will pester tripitaka constantly to stop talking to ao lie.

nezha is a main character, he is the connection for tripitaka to the neighborhood. he acts a bit like a scout, alerting tripitaka to events that are happening or people that need help or things fixed. nezha seeks out tripitaka because he knows that tripitaka is dependable and wants the best for people.

as for how it translates to the og story of jttw… in my head, eventually, tripitaka is forced to leave Jade City with his robots and head west. i don't have it all figured out yet, but the scrolls would instead be like… some kind of data. sorry this part is so vague haha, in my head there is a closer resemblance. i currently have the story split into a few parts, and right now we're remaining in jade city.

thank you so much for asking!! i love rambling about these guys….

[the-bed-gremlins-reading-list]

Code Name: Oracle

This project is in the very early stages of development – everything here is highly variable as I keep working out the details. That said, please send in any questions you like about this project or Phoenix Knight! I’m saving anything to do with PK bugs and fixes until a later date since I’m going to take a break from writing it, but I’m still happy to answer questions about the RO’s and setting.

Summary: Life in Delphi City is pretty much like life anywhere – there’s problems, lots of them, but there’s good points too – maybe a bit fewer. But whatever your feelings are about it - it is home. It is also the city with the highest concentration of super villainy on the planet.

The Guardians are the local superhero team, made up of ‘Paths’ – the people with powers – that are on the side of what is good and right, and approved by the government. Their job is to take care of the villains with powers – and sometimes the ones just smart enough to build doomsday weapons. That kind of thing.

The stuff that’s way above your paygrade.

You might be one of the city’s most skilled detectives but you’re still just a detective. Your bad guys don’t have powers (usually). And messing with one that does ends in a world of pain – kidnapped and experimented on by a previously unknown mad scientist type you’re eventually rescued by a hydrokinetic path.

When your powers are discovered, you’re a chance for the Guardians to snatch up an in-house investigator - a part of the crime fighting process they’d previously been forced to rely on the police and other agencies for. And with people beginning to develop into Paths at previously unheard of rates for some unknown reason, Delphi City needs its Guardians to find the answer.

But now they have you. Formerly one of the best detectives in the city but now... after everything that’s happened, you don’t know what you are, but they have decided what they want you to be:

Their very own Oracle.

Features

An +18 rating, again, more for my own peace of mind than what I believe the content will actually be, but I ask that it’s respected.

Warnings: imprisonment, experimentation, police, injuries, genre-typical violence, more to be added.

Planned Features Include:

Customizable Skill Approach - What kind of detective were you known to be. Are you the sort of detective that is good with getting people to tell you what you need to know? Are you the sort that can chase down and catch and answer even if it has you sprinting across rooftops? Are you the sort that notices the details and can put them together? And is that still your style?

Customizable pronouns (with an option in the player menu to reset them as desired)

Decide why you joined the police in the first place. Also decide how you feel about your maverick big brother.

Four romance routes currently planned: Siren, Warren, Cal, and Victoria

Characters

The Detective – Gender Selectable - MC – A legacy cop, whose grandfather and father were both respected life-long officers, your family has a reputation in the DCPD - one that your older brother managed to thoroughly trash, or redeem, depending on who you ask while you were still on the beat. Your position is hard won but no one can deny your skills as an investigator, family name or no. But when your kidnapping results in the development of powers, making you a ‘Path’ you’re put into the Guardians, not as a costumed hero, but as an investigative specialist.

The Villain: “Siren” – Gender Selectable – RO - Without any evidence to prove that the mysterious Siren was a supervillain and not just a very clever criminal the detective and their partner were originally assigned to attempt to apprehend them – or, otherwise, gather enough evidence to make the Siren the Guardian’s problem and not the DCPD’s.  Now you’re a Guardian and in the six months since that stakeout  and it’s very much your job to catch them – but why are they being so damn helpful?

The Leader: Warren Hughes, “Commander Truth” – NB – RO – The Guardian’s telepathic leader, Warren is a strict person with high expectations for everyone around them, but perhaps the highest set for themself. You know Commander Truth best by their black-and-white-lightning bolt costume from the situations where the police have had to work with the Guardians. You definitely didn’t expect your brother’s best friend – and a vague shadow in your life since Adrian went to high school and first met Warren - to be the one under the mask.

The Rookie: Callum Lindsey, “Titan” – M – RO – The newest member of the Guardians, apart from you, Cal has only been in Delphi City for eight months. The blue-and-gold clad ferrokinetic path who can twist buildings out of shape with his abilities is not who you were expecting to be the team’s grinning cinnamon roll, but Cal is definitely the warmest welcome you get to the team.

The Protector: Victoria Aragorn, “Starlight” – F – RO – One of the longest serving Guardians, she joined the official superhero line-up at the same time that Commander Truth did. Though her abilities as a Path give her control over fire – and to a lesser degree light and warmth – she is most famous for her skilled usage of traditional martial weapons and unarmed combat forms. Before Victoria put in the red and black suit of Delphi City’s ‘Starlight’ she worked for the government doing the sort of things only a Path could. (A/N: Victoria’s code name might change later on, but right now I’m amused by the idea of Siren giving her hell over it via “Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star” so it’s what I’ve got for now.)

The Partner: Theresa ‘Tessa’ Graves – F – Tessa and you have been partners for two years now, and friends for longer than that. She was there on the stakeout the night when everything changed. Her injuries might have forced her to retire from police work but after everything you’ve been through together she’s definitely not retiring from being your best friend. No matter what your opinion on the matter actually is.

The Brother: Adrian – M – Your elder brother is the only family you have left these days, not that that feels all that new. He’s also the one responsible for ruining the family’s sterling reputation when his work uncovered a massive amount of corruption in the police related to bribes and deals made with the city’s supervillain community and he didn’t do the brass the courtesy of backing down quietly about it – instead handing the entirety of his evidence over to the Guardians to pursue and, what was safe to, over to reporters the same day that he handed in his resignation. He claims he’s much happier these days, working as a PI and writing what he reassures you is going to be ‘the worst novel of all time’.

The Doctor: Elis Mercy - M - The doctor in charge of looking after the Guardians, and because of your position and the circumstances around your kidnapping he’s also been your doctor since your rescue. In addition to being one of the only doctors in the city that specializes in caring for Empathic people, his own Path allows him to heal injuries. But just those of the trauma variety - broken bones, bruises, cuts and lacerations, not infections and not poisons. (A/N: The doc’s name is a stand-in, I’m not happy with it. So I’m going to keep fishing around for one that fits him.)

[purplelurkinghini]

Narcissus by the Pond

0. PROLOGUE 

Under the cut is the prologue to yet another multi-chapter mess I am planning to write. What is different about this one is the narrator: Edward Nygma himself. Another aspect of this piece that sets it apart from the rest of my writing is its epistolary form. That’s right, baby! First-person POV!

If you’ve seen >> this << post floating around, this is indeed me actually putting that second prompt to use. 

Enjoy!

Dear ▚▛▙▙

I found a cat toy while cleaning out my closet today. It was that ashy plush mouse stuffed with dried nepeta cataria which you spent money on instead of saving up for your student loans. If he were still here, he’d be rolling around on the floor in some vivid dream in which he was a lion and it was a gazelle. And, if you were still here, I would’ve asked you to stay.

The day you got that tabby’s claws into me was the day you checked into work late. Frank, our project manager and your internship supervisor, had to drop his showman act and instill in you the fear all WayneTech employees are motivated by. After you offered your excuses and exchanged glances with the floor, you were free to enter the kitchen to heat up the coffees that you went out of your way to fetch for us each morning.  

My daily routine, which you’ve played no small role in forming during your short stay with us, was disrupted by the absence of caffeine in my bloodstream. I remember my Rubik’s cube and how I crammed a corner into my palm, squeezing down on the still unscrambled sides. I would call it an ‘absentminded’ action, but we both know that would be an incorrect assessment. My mind is never not present, even as it wanders. For this reason, when you finally came out of the kitchen, I couldn’t not wonder what happened to your sweatshirt. It must’ve been soaked in rainwater, I concluded, and that was the reason you removed it. Or, rather, that was the excuse you used as you removed it. After all, your sneakers were soggy, but you couldn't exactly walk barefoot all over a corporate. Even so, there you were, in a far too small t-shirt which was too tight around your torso and too short to cover your stomach, walking around the office with your brewed bribes. 

“Here you go, Jim” you placed the foam cup right in front of his face to get him to notice you. I’d argue that that slip of skin that was eye level to him was enough to get that scatterbrain's attention. He must’ve made a joke, or attempted to, because you laughed louder than anyone should around him. 

“Cory,” you sauntered over to him. “I asked the barista for two tablespoons and a half this time.” Sure, he might’ve taken his glasses off before taste-testing it, but his lenses were fogged-up before the lid came off. You felt the most confidence around Cory, the least confident one in our team. While no line of code was too complex for him, women were a mystery he had yet to solve. You see, I haven’t failed to notice you making the most physical contact with him, brushing your hand against his as a means of disarming him. 

After he served you a stuttered smile, you moved on to Paul who was pretending to be preoccupied with his screen. He’d been watching you since you walked out of the kitchen, yet still acted surprised when you showed up next to him. You didn’t mean to disturb him, of course, so you tip-toed around his desk, silently setting the cup on a coaster. He thanked you without taking his eyes off of his work, but took the time to watch you walk away as soon as you turned away from him. 

"I'm sorry, Ed," you pouted as you placed the coffee on top of a stack of papers. "I know like to have your coffee before 8, but the storm hit while I was in the shop and the whole street took cover in there-"

"Slow down," I released the Rubik’s cube, flexing my fingers. "I'm not your supervisor. It’s not my forgiveness you need."

"Well, no, but I actually want your forgiveness," you covered your mouth in a coquettish display. "I mean-"

“Like I said,” I brush off the blush creeping up on my cheeks. "There's no use for that." Fetching the foam cup, I take a sip of the scolding beverage and brave through it. “There's no use to ask the barista to write our full names either. This calligraphy exercise cost you a scolding from Frank.”

“Actually,” you pulled the hem of your shirt down which only uncovered more of your cleavage instead of hiding your stomach. “I wrote your name myself.”

I stroked the surface of the cup right across the script. Again, I can’t call this action ‘absentminded’ either, but my mind had wandered off again. That lovely lettering was yours and so was the green marker, so you must’ve scavenged your backpack for it on a crowded morning train. You also must’ve taken your time steadying your hand for each stroke, each dot. E. Nygma. You also must’ve cleaned up the cup as it inevitably spilled and steadied your tongue for each stroke, each lick. Maybe you ever sampled the coffee yourself, the taste of cherry Chapstick staining the rim.

“Well,” you interrupted my intrusive thoughts. “Jim’s showing me the new user interface, so-”

“Of course,” I dismissed you and my daydreams.

“Talk to you later.”

Yes, that was the day the cat got his claws into me. It was after I’d drained the drink, and found myself restless still, that I made my way into the kitchen for another one. That is when I spotted you in the corner, cradling the sweatshirt you discarded earlier. At the sound of my steps, you straightened your back, but you didn’t turn your torso towards me. 

“Hey, Ed,” you smiled and it was a painful sight because I couldn’t ignore the panic I ignited in your eyes. “Lunchtime already?”

“What are you doing?”

“Umm, trying to dry my shirt?”

The closer I got, the more gregarious you grew. You asked about what I’d like to eat, what the guys would like to eat, if I’d like to order out. You didn’t stop until I asked it of you. 

“What are you hiding from me?”

Before you could bellow out something long enough to cover the sound, I heard it.

“Did your hoodie just meow?”

It was only then that you turned, facing me fully. “Please don’t tell Frank, but this is the reason I was running late.” Two pairs of eyes were pleading with me. One belonged to you and they were begging. The other belonged to an orange ball of fur and they were unblinking. 

You were holding a bottle cap filled with water up to its meowing maw, so you must’ve been attempting to keep the animal hydrated, even after rescuing it from the streets in the middle of a storm. You bought kitten kibbles on your way to WayneTech and that had eaten ten minutes of your time and cost you a scolding from Frank.

“I couldn’t just leave Eddie to drown in a ditch somewhere.”

“Eddie?”

“Yeah,” you let it sink its little teeth into your skin as it held a single finger close with two whole paws. They feel like needles, I should know, but you carried on cooing the pincushion. “He reminds me of another green-eyed ginger. Maybe you know him.”

Yes, you remember now, don’t you? That was the moment Eddie sunk his claws into me, and I do mean it literally. He released your finger only to get his paws trapped into my button-up. I also mean it figuratively, as I swore to keep your secret the very next second. And, once you were by my side, shadowing me as I was coding like you wanted to since your first day of internship, you made me swear to keep him. How could I not? Your dorm had a ‘no pets’ policy and you had named him after me. 

The two of us had time to get acquainted after you left for your evening classes. I fed him the kibbles and was careful not to get caught. And, because I wouldn't be using it that day anyway, I replaced your sweatshirt with my gym towel. While it smelled like a sad, soaked kitten, whatever fruity fragrance you were using had yet to fade from the fabric. That evening I drove straight home as soon as I left WayneTech, skipping my daily workout. My daily routine, as I’ve mentioned, had been modified by you. 

“We don't even need to potty train him,” you giggled when you saw Eddie digging through the brand new litter box I had ordered. It had been waiting for me by the front entrance along with the delivery guy and yourself.

You got into a cab before even texting me, asking for an address only after the driver started the clock. I expected that stupid stunt from the likes of Jim, not you. 

“He's a clever boy,” I smiled when I saw you were still wearing the green button-up shirt I asked you to exchange that shrunken t-shirt of yours with. “Like his namesake.”

You kneeled before the kitten and produced the plush mouse I'd only seen Eddie play with once. “Did the shampoo arrive? He should be high enough to not scratch our eyes out now.”

After rolling around on the rug with a bag full of catnip, he seemed blissed out enough for a bath. And, after only scratching you twice as you held him for me to scrub his ginger fur ever so gently, we got him all dried and drained. Those green eyes were barely opened as he looked up at us from the cat bed he was supposed to grow into and the sweatshirt he had grown fond of. 

“Now we know he hates all water,” you said through gritted teeth as I sanitized your shaking hands. Your fingers were as fidgety as Cory's, yet I doubt his skin was ever that soft. “Not just the rain.”

“I bet he'd hate flees more,” I caressed your knuckles after bandaging the bloody bits.

“I hate the rain, too,” your eyes were downcast, much like earlier that morning, seemingly searching my sheets for something. “I never knew Frank could be so-”

“Terrifying?”

“Mean,” your giggle wasn't as gleeful as I'd grown used to. “I thought he was going to fire me right then and there.”

“He wouldn't,” I squeezed down on the shadows of your hands as they were snatched away from me. Then, I leaned in close and almost brushed your love with my lips as they moved: “He will let the anxiety that comes with that uncertainty eat you alive first.”

“See, now you're being mean,” you laughed, finally looking up at me. 

“Me? Never,” I said, satisfied with myself. You were laughing - actually laughing - because of me. 

When the dryer dinged, I was confident in leaving you in my bedroom with a smile on your face. After all, I was the one who brought you in there and I was the one who brought that out of you. Once I've collected your clothes, I returned to find you had already removed my button-up and was drying up the rest of your skin with one of my towels. You were turned only half the way, so you must've perceived me in your periphery. Paul pulled the same thing earlier today. Still, you sounded surprised as you covered the side of your breasts I bet you wanted me to see. 

"Forgive me,” I turned around, but, unlike you, I did it all the way. “Here you are,” I stretched my arm behind me to hand you the bra and t-shirt. 

“Thank you.” It was only after your bomber jacket was zipped to your chin that I dared to look at you directly. Your sweatshirt was Eddie's now, so you covered up with what you had. “For everything.”

“Let me drive you to your dorm.”

"You've already done enough," you pulled out your phone as I walked you to the door. “I'll just call another cab. Eddie needs you here. You need to wear him out, or he'll wear you out tonight.”

“Cats are crepuscular creatures,” I assure you. “Not nocturnal. I'm sure he'll fall asleep before I even turn in for the night.”

Yes, I was sure he'd fall. However, Eddie was so convinced. And, sure enough, there he was, meowing in my face at midnight. 

My mistake was letting him get his claws into me. You see, I couldn't bear waking that little bastard up. Not when he looked so small in the middle of your sweatshirt, in the middle of his bed. He finally had a dry place to dream in and I couldn't take that away from him, so I let him sink his claws into me that much deeper. 

And yours, as well.

After chasing him with my hand atop of my covers and letting him swat at the finger-spider, he was ready for bed. My bed. Yes, his green eyes were drooping when he surrendered to sleep. It just so happened that he did it on the left side of my bed. And I, not willing to risk another rude awakening, placed him atop of the pillow. Then, ever so silently, I slipped out of bed and into the bathroom. It was on my way back that I stumbled upon it: your sweatshirt. 

I recall calling it off the floor and taking it with me to bed. For Eddie, of course. He loved that sweatshirt, as I'm sure you know. However, as I placed it on his pillow, I caught a whiff of it. It smelled like rainwater, pet shampoo, Eddie, and you. It was your sweat and deodorant, sweet and soapy, just as I had smelled it on my shirt before tossing it in the laundry basket and I couldn't smell it on the left side of my bed. 

As I closed my eyes, I saw you. You were walking around the office, their wandering eyes watching you. You pass my desk and I am drenched in your scent. Sweet. Soapy. Soaking. Your sweatshirt is drenched, so you discard it. Your t-shirt is too tight, so I can see the dip of your belly button and the swell of your breasts. Though I am convinced you had a bra to cover them, my mind wanders. It wanders about the color of your nipples and it paints a picture of them peeking through the flimsy fabric. 

And, as my mind wanders further, that flimsy fabric is pulled down, your hands wriggling at the hem of it. That's when those peeks pop out along with the rest. All of a sudden, you're soaking. Sweet. Soapy. You even try to hide this from me, crossing your arms over your chest. I capture your hands, soft skin, and fidgeting fingers, and wrestle with them. Oh, how easily you surrendered to me, sighing in defeat. I lock your arms behind your back with one hand and squeeze your tit like a stress toy. Sweet. Soapy. Soaking. I had to taste it. 

When my tongue touched the tip, you pushed against it, filling my mouth with your flesh. You wanted this. That nipple is as sharp as a needle, but it melts in the heat of my mouth. You wanted this. After your tit is slick with my saliva and the peak is all puffy, I gather the other one in my grip and repeat. Sweet. Soapy. Soaking.

You wanted this and you told me as much. You said it loud enough for the others to hear. You wanted this. You wanted me. And, as if I haven't done enough, as if I haven't given you enough, I gave you all of me. Clearing the desk, cube, keypad, computer, and all, I slam you atop the surface. I had to pull down your pants for you, but your legs part all on their own. As for your panties, well, they all but dissolved under the duress. You attempt to hide from me again, tightening your thighs together. And, again, you surrender to me all too easily. After all, you want me. Your pussy? As I parted your legs and pushed your knees up to your chest, I saw how much she wanted me. Sweet. Soapy. Soaking.

However, I was not in a hurry. No matter how hot were your insides and how cold the chills were down my spine, I still took my sweet, soapy, soaking time. I set myself loose, my length slapping against your ass once it sprang free. You shivered, your back arching like a bow and your hands treading through your tangled hair. You wanted me. I took my time, sandwiching my shaft between your pussy lips, sliding across the slick and even wearing your labia as a hood atop its head for a maddening moment. It was only when you began begging, mewling to be mated that I gave myself to you. I crammed my cock inside of your cunt and went in so deep, I felt your heartbeat as your inner walls collapsed around me. 

Sweet. Soapy. Soaking. I fucked you into a fever, your skin as slick as your insides and your mouth leaking as much saliva as your pussy was spilling precum. Sweet. Soapy. Soaking. Soon, it would've been spilling cum. Sweet. Soapy. Soaking. When I did come, however, it was in my fist and not between your lips. 

As I opened my eyes, you disappeared. There was nothing there to greet me but the strike of the street lights slashing the darkness across the ceiling. Your sweetness had been replaced with my saltiness. It was indeed soapy and soaking, but it wasn’t you. Then, for the second time that night, I slipped out of bed and snuck into the bathroom.

The day you got cat’s claws into my shirt was the day you sunk your own under my skin. After that day, we shared a secret. I never told Frank about Eddie, but Eddie never told you about what I did in the dark. His glowing green eyes didn’t judge me, but they never let me forget. After you left without a notice, ginning up your internship, changing your phone number and never surrendering your real name, I couldn’t face them anymore. His eyes never let me forget, so I rehomed him.

I found your Gotham U sweatshirt while cleaning out my closet today. The name you gave WayneTech is nowhere to be found in their student records. Your name can’t be found in any police records either. Your real name, however, I am sure will uncover quite the mystery.

Yours,

E. NYGMA 

[aquilamage]

New fic dropping time!!!! So, there's german in this fic, which I will be putting translations for at the end. I only have very very rudimentary German knowledge and some research, so if I've gotten something wrong let me know. Also, I decided to lean more into my nonbinary Klavier headcanon and experiment with he/they pronouns for Klavier throughout the narrative! Also also big shoutout to @unnecessarygayfeelings for the conversation that inspired basically the whole framework of this and then being so encouraging with me on writing it ^-^

When Klavier finds themself developing feelings for his former classmate turned recent coworker, they attempt to conceal it behind a language barrier. A plan which, due to some major miscalculations, explodes spectacularly in his face.

Klavier paced the area of their office, fingers snapping at their side with the swaying of their arm. His music was turned up, the kind of loud where he could feel the beat in his body, and yet still not enough to drown out his extraneous thoughts as he tried to concentrate. There were still two days before this robbery case went to trial, but that only meant they had no excuses not to have everything perfekt.

On a dime, he spun around, pointing dramatically at the evidence displayed on his monitors. Of course! There were only a couple of footprints outside the shop, and none of them were the owner’s, which meant……

Well, they weren’t sure.

Sighing, they leaned their elbow against the window. As he gazed out it, he noticed a smudge on the glass, not too high for him to reach, but taller than he’d expect to casually put his hand or forehead. He frowned. Where had that come from? There was a cloth for cleaning that somewhere around here – technically someone came in to clean the prosecutor’s offices, but the one time it had been done for him, their reorganization had sent him into a panic when he couldn’t find what he needed, so now he took care of it himself.

Klavier was in the middle of rearranging their guitar cabinet when they paused, and blinked. What was he doing? He’d realized the display case could look better when he’d walked over to put a stack of papers in his file cabinet, which he’d gathered up after doing something…with his chair? Which they’d only gotten to sometime in looking for that cleaning cloth… They glanced over at the monitors.

Right, the case.

With a groan, he ran a hand up his face, bunching his bangs up into his hair. Coffee. They needed caffeine, and maybe a snack.

The office break room wasn’t exactly his first choice for somewhere to get a drink, considering they only had a half-decent coffee machine, sugar, and a few flavors of creamer, while Klavier’s usual orders were of the sort that ended up sounding like some obscure secret code. But despite the initial hubbub about their leaving mid-tour to return to the legal world dying down, they couldn’t bank on going out without running into at least a small group of fans, and lunch was still a ways off. This way he could go about his business and get back to the office unbothered.

Or at least, less bothered. As he approached, he could hear running water, and faintly some kind of voice. He walked in without pause. So far, none of his coworkers had given him trouble, and he wasn’t about to be intimidated by the potential of it now.

Still, it was a pleasant surprise when they found Sebastian at the counter, filling up the electric kettle. “Schatzi!” they called, “how are you?”

He turned, the tiny frown of puzzlement quickly morphing into a smile. “Klavier, hi! Making tea,” he said, holding up the kettle. “Oh! Do you want some?”

Ach, he was so cute. “Nein, danke. I am here to tackle this beast.” Gently, he slapped the top of the coffee machine. The puff of laughter he received in response made him feel almost dizzy (which they might have blamed on needing to eat had they not already accepted the existence of their feelings).

Even as he began setting up his drink, Klavier couldn’t help but sneak glances over at his former classmate. At Themis, their relationship had been…complicated, although the Sebastian of then probably wouldn’t have described it as such. The last time they’d seen each other had been pre-graduation, and as he embarked on his musical career, Klavier had been perfectly willing to leave even the memory of his old acquaintance behind. Hop forward seven years, though, and…

Some things about Sebastian hadn’t changed. He still had trouble with words, and when he listened to music (and sometimes otherwise), he conducted along with it. This soft, airy piece felt constricted being projected from a mere phone speaker, but the gentle precise looping motions of his hand coaxed it back into life, and something more than that.

Despite the consistencies, much more of Sebastian had changed than hadn’t. When Klavier had started back at the office, Sebastian had been one of the first prosecutors they’d met. Sebastian approached them on his own and introduced himself – whether he was aiming for a fresh start or thought Klavier had forgotten him, they didn’t know. His confidence in his actions was less in volume than Klavier was used to, but solid, and that had piqued their curiosity from the beginning.

At the end of their little talk, he’d glanced up and down the hall and said “I’m sorry about your brother.” It was soft and sad and the only time he brought the subject up. They were still sorting out their feelings about that, although after some research they had an idea of where he was coming from. From that angle, at least, they could appreciate the sentiment.

Sebastian fumbled over words now instead of getting them wrong outright, Klavier had noticed over the following days, as he decided to pursue the connection the other had started. And the conducting...the conducting was very endearing.

He seemed to notice Klavier then, halting mid-motion. “Sorry,” he muttered, folding his arms.

“It’s nothing to apologize for,” they said, projecting as much reassurance as they could with the softness of their eyes, the angle of their posture.

“...Okay.” He eased into a little smile, leaning back against the counter. There was just the lightest dusting of freckles under his eyes, a few shades off from his hair.

“Um, do you need help with something?”

“Mm?” Then Klavier realized they were still staring while Sebastian had been looking at them. “Ah, I’m fine! Just a little distracted.” He left off by what. Less information was better in this kind of situation, and if Sebastian did ask, he would just come up with something.

A nod. Then, a few seconds later. “When you’re done, can I get something from that cabinet?”

Fast as he could, he punched the last couple buttons to start brewing and leaned down to open the door. “Let me help you with that. What do you need, liebling?”

“Oh, thanks. The orange blossom?” When Sebastian asked a question, his mouth went together a little, like he was going to pout but stopped midway through.

There were a lot of boxes of tea in there, but eventually they located the right one and emerged holding the bag aloft. “für dich, Süßer,” they said, using their most dazzling smile.

Sebastian laughed. (And people told Klavier his voice sounded pretty.)

After a second, they realized their friend was tilting his head to the side, watching them. “...sorry, did you say something?”

“Is that the only one?”

Klavier shook his head. “Nein, but,” he looked at the mug on the counter (with a colorful logo of some place he’d never heard of on one side and on the other plain text that read “They Didn’t Have My Name”). It was relatively large, but, “how strong do you like this?”

Oh, no, I-” Turning, he moved over a pair of travel mugs. When Klavier raised their eyebrows, he frowned. “It stays really warm that way and it’s easier than going back all the time!”

“Wie geht es dir so süß?” When Sebastian’s defensive look only intensified, he waved a hand. “That’s clever of you.” The little smile they got in response to that made their heart soar. “Ah,” he ducked back down before he started grinning to the point of being obvious even to Sebastian, “three, then?”

“Yes.” Still smiling, he took the tea from them. He poured out the water, carefully unwrapping all the packets before dropping the bags in with an almost meditative kind of concentration. This too, was new for Klavier to witness. And again, something he found himself the opposite of minding.

The coffee maker beeped. As he grabbed his own mug, he realized something. “How do you plan on getting those back?”

Sebastian, who was holding the mug in both shaky hands, grinned and made a motion as if to pick the others up in the crook of his arms.

Ah. “Well, I have a free hand. May I-” they reached toward the mug. “That way if one of us gets spilled on it’s the one with the darker shirt.” More importantly, it would be him and not Sebastian, but he wasn’t saying that out loud. Not today.

Besides, it really would be a shame to ruin the mostly-pastels of his outfit. The blue of his tailcoat especially was. Really nice on him. Had Sebastian always been this cute, and if so how on earth had they missed it before?

They headed out in the hallway. “How are you doing? It’s been a little while.”

“You mean three days?” he smirked. A moment later, his expression drew back to neutral. “That was a joke.”

Klavier simply nodded. Sebastian still didn’t get tone all the time, even if he was more aware of it, so they weren’t about to argue with him trying to be considerate about that kind of thing.

“But...it’s been pretty good. Kay and I got put on the same case, which is a lot, especially since we can’t talk about it when we’re home.” As he talked, his hands moved. He probably would have been more cautious if he had something open, but it still made Klavier glad he was the one holding the mugs. “Yeah. I’m min- managing.”

See, this would be the perfect opportunity to extend an offer to help him take his mind off things for a while. Invite him out to dinner. Smooth and casual, with the potential to back into something platonic, worst case.

And oh, they wanted to. But it wasn’t the right time. He still had his hands full investigating what happened to Kristoph, into that Justice character and his connection to Herr Wright. It would be enough just juggling two careers and keeping a new relationship insulated from the public, without everything else he was dealing with right then.

Besides, he was pretty sure Herr Edgeworth would bite his head off if he got that close to his protege.

So instead they said, “Well, I’m glad you are, liebling,” with all the genuine warmth they had. (He couldn’t help the little bit of pride at the statement; even if he wasn’t able to express his affection directly, it didn’t mean he had to restrain himself either. With his extra language, he could use terms of affection while everyone around remained none the wiser.)

They reached Sebastian’s office. Shifting the thermoses to one side, he opened the door for Klavier. The little half-bow he did after, indicating for him to go inside, almost made Klavier drop a mug.

In the end, though, it got safely to Sebastian’s desk, on a coaster decorated with a pattern of sheet music that seemed like a real song but wasn’t one Klavier recognized on sight. “There. All set.”

“Thanks, Klavier.” He beamed as he walked over next to him.

Something else that had changed: Sebastian had grown a few inches in the years since they’d known him at school. He hadn’t been cute in the ‘small’ sense since he’d shot up what seemed like a foot during the break between their first and second years, but now he’d filled comfortably into his height (the same as Klavier), and it was something to think they could just step forward and-

But Klavier restrained themself. Not now.

Sebastian stopped on the other side of the desk. “Do you...want to stay here for a while? I can move stuff off the couch or the other chair while you get your stuff.”

Ach, be still his beating heart. “I appreciate the offer, but-”

“Sebastian, how are things coming along with the-” Herr Edgeworth stuck his head in through the door, stopping when he noticed Klavier. His expression didn’t change, save for an extra wrinkle on his forehead.

If he wasn’t leaving already…

“Ah, I’ll let you two get to work.” Grabbing up his mug, he smiled briefly at Sebastian before walking out. As he twisted past Herr Edgeworth, who was looking the other direction, he couldn’t resist calling out “bis spater, schatz!”

It was such a little thing, but it made them smile all the way back to their office. And, a little later on in the day, gave them the tiniest of laughs when they went to the Chief Prosecutor’s office. This was just a normal check-in, so things went smoothly. Herr Edgeworth’s few glances at them were a little more like glares, but he said nothing that didn’t relate to the business at hand, so they were more than willing to let it be.

They were interrupted when the phone rang. He checked the number, then frowned. “Excuse me, I need to take this.”

“No problem,” they said, leaning back in their chair.

“Chief Prosecutor Miles Edgeworth speaking.” A few moments of listening and then he sighed “Yes, Franziska, I know-,” walking to the far corner of the room. There, he continued talking, softer.

Klavier couldn’t make out what was being said. Nor was he interested in listening in. But still, after a few exchanges, something about the sound pricked his ears. As he tried to pay attention, it still took him a second, since he had to switch his brain over to German. They weren’t sure why they’d suddenly started paying attention, though; it was just about a case Interpol needed help wi-

Oh. Something heavy dropped in his stomach, squashing his insides together. His brain was still taking in everything happening around him as if from far away, but neither thoughts nor movement were happening for him. Which was a shame, because if he could control his body he might be long gone by now.

Instead, he sat there for the rest of the conversation, and as Herr Edgeworth walked all the way back over to face him. “Prosecutor Gavin,” he said, usual neutrality tinged with the tone of a polite cough.

For a terrifying moment, he could only stare up at where his boss was carefully rearranging papers on his desk. Thoughts came back first, of course. There was no way circumstances would be kind to them. And the first one was that he knew. Worse, he knew that Klavier knew now. The fact that he was avoiding the subject was a relief in that he didn’t suddenly have to figure out what to say, but it didn’t help the pain in his gut or the heat in his face.

“May I be excused for the rest of the day?” He was already embarrassed enough that the strained tone of his voice, once he finally regained use of it, barely even registered.

There was a slight pause, Herr Edgeworth still staring down at his files, before he said, “...Yes.”

The hall outside was a blur, a few people they saw but didn’t process passing them as they stumbled through with whatever the opposite of mindfulness is. He felt a right mess, but none of that mattered right now. He just needed to get outside, to get home, and not think about this for the rest of the d-

“Klavier?”

The voice jolted him out of his state, and he tripped over his feet, falling to the ground. He managed to pick his bag up, but immediately dropped it again when he saw who it was.

Sebastian rushed over. “Are you okay?” A frown. “You shouldn’t be at work like this.”

Ducking their head to hide the new bout of warmth they felt across it, they said, “Nein, ach, ja that- which is why I am on my way home.” Trying to stand, they were met by an arm being thrust toward them. After a brief hesitation, Klavier allowed Sebastian to pull them upright.

Even once he’d gotten his bearings, though, Sebastian didn’t release him. “Let me help you,” he said and, gentle but insistent, started guiding him down the hall.

“Th-there’s no need. It’s not that bad.” The moment he started to tug out of the grip, Sebastian let go entirely. Not expecting it, he tripped again, although not falling this time.

Sebastian’s frown deepened and he flapped his hands, once. “Well I’m not letting you drive yourself home, so there! I’m taking you.”

Ach, his expression was adorable, and were it not for the twin incidents of this morning putting lead butterflies in his stomach Klavier would have gladly let him. “Nein, I couldn’t take you away from your work. I’ll call a taxi.” They tried for their usual smooth tone. Instead, they got almost as squeaky as their words to Herr Edgeworth.

“It’s fine! I was going to take my lunch now anyway.” With a smile in his eyes, he held out his hand once again.

“...I wouldn’t want to get you sick.”

He shrugged. “I’ve only gotten sick off Kay once in all the times she’s ever been sick, so you don’t need to worry about that.”

Klavier went to protest again, but his throat was dry and crackly, and worse, he couldn’t think of anything else to say. So he sighed and took the hand.

Even if Sebastian would’ve thought it was from not being well, they were thankful for his gloves keeping him from feeling how gross their palms were – like a teenager on their first date. Sebastian took them along at normal walking speed, with a “let me know if we’re going too fast” after the first couple steps.

All Klavier could think about was the firm, gentle grip on his hand, the place where their arms interlocked (for added stability, but his mind kept going to images of how people led around their dates at formal events), the way their fingers interlaced… He didn’t even notice Sebastian had taken them into the stairwell until the first step. Oh. It was fine. This just meant this would take longer, he thought, as Sebastian held his hand a little tighter.

Not that he fancied this, but being stuck in the elevator with his coworkers as potential witnesses wasn’t any better. Herr Edgeworth wasn’t a gossip; he wouldn’t tell anyone, but if Klavier didn’t know one person’s language capabilities (or even whether they’d look things up, he realized with a jolt, remembering an interviewer joking about spikes in German translation searches after any Gavinners concert), how could he assume anyone’s?

(Would Herr Edgeworth tell Sebastian, considering? Or would someone else, if they knew? Had they not been on a landing at the moment of that thought he certainly would’ve taken a real tumble.)

By the time they got to the parking lot, Klavier would've believed they were sick themself, their head dizzy and fever-flushed. They didn’t protest at all as Sebastian helped them into the passenger seat. A brief glance in the side mirror revealed their hair to be out of place just enough to bother them and them alone, face if not red then certainly off from their usual color. Closing their eyes, they sank back against the cushions and headrest. Now they could sleep, or at least pretend to (and ignore the phantom feeling of Sebastian’s hand on theirs).

Although he did peek them open when the radio crackled on with the car, playing some upbeat pop song that Sebastian quickly turned off.

“Sorry,” he whispered. “Do you want me to switch it to something you like, or keep it off?”

Ah, he was so considerate it made Klavier want to cry. He’d probably ask about the temperature next. (He did, once Klavier said he was fine with whatever).

All that time spent sleeping on tour buses really helped him sit comfortably during the ride, the biggest bother being that Sebastian was right there. He couldn’t quite stop thinking about it, with everything that was happening. So it only kind of felt excruciatingly long. They were ever so grateful that Sebastian seemed fine with silence between them.

Finally, they pulled up at Klavier’s house. “Do you want me to-” Sebastian asked as Klavier unbuckled his seat belt.

Even though his legs did feel a bit wobbly, he wasn’t sure if he could handle another round of being so close to Sebastian. Or that he wouldn’t have trouble letting go at the end. “I can manage this much, don’t worry.” They almost added a ‘schatz’ at the end, catching themself just in time.

A nod. Then, he reached into the center console, grabbing some receipt. Even as Klavier watched, transfixed, he scribbled out a phone number and handed it to him. “Uh, here. If you start feeling worse and need something, let me know, ok?”

Klavier could only nod back and try not to think about the fact that Sebastian had just given him his number (step two: immediately failed). With a lack of grace that would've made headlines had a music reporter been around, he got out of the car and in through the door, shutting it behind without a single backwards glance. They collapsed face first onto the couch and screamed into the cushion – the kind of head and throat scream exactly how they’d long ago been trained not to do.

Once he finally stilled into silence, Vongole padded over, pushing her head under his palm.

With a sigh, he moved just enough to scratch her behind the ears. The soft warmth of her fur was grounding to run his fingers through, and soon, between that and simply lying down, his body relaxed.

When he finally sat up, he kicked off his shoes and dropped his bag before heading to his room. After all they’d been through, they needed to relax. He took off his makeup and changed to a t-shirt and the one pair of sweatpants he owned. As he threw his other clothes over a chair, the paper he’d stuck in a pocket earlier fell to the ground. Sebastian’s number. Klavier snatched it up and threw it on their bedside table – they’d deal with the...everything...related to that later.

A while later he sat back on the couch, this time with lunch and Vongole curled up at his feet as he picked out a movie. (His first instinct was one of the bubblegum teen movies he re-watched when he wanted something fun – the romance plot in those might hit a little too close to home, though. Instead, he went for a cooking show. Safe, basic, still entertaining). He watched it through, and then several more, with breaks for more food and a brief walk with Vongole. It was nice. Klavier couldn’t remember when they’d last just taken some time off – usually having too little to do made them antsy, but between also petting Vongole and idly shopping on their phone, it made for a pleasant one-off afternoon.

He was dozing off when a knock at the door startled him. Groggily pushing a few loose strands of hair back, he stared in that direction. Just as he was about to lie back down, the knock repeated itself.

Only after a third repeat, moments later, did they actually get up. The list of people who would know where he lived was short, and his phone had lost battery a little while ago without him getting up to recharge it.

It was Sebastian. There was a surge of panic at how he’d gotten there before he remembered being given a lift earlier. “Hallo,” he managed, leaning against the door frame.

“Hi. Uh,” he ran his thumb over the ridges of the lid of the plastic container he was holding. “Sorry about showing up without saying anything, but I’d already made the soup when I ra- realized I didn’t have a way to message you, and I know it’s hard cooking when you don’t feel good so-” He held it out to Klavier.

It was warm, and as the container got closer they could faintly smell rich broth. Sebastian had made them food. Made them food and brought it over without being asked because he was concerned for them.

Then he realized he was staring. “Ach, sorry.”

“No, it’s fine! You seem pretty tired; have you been resting?”

Oh, heck. In answering the door, he’d completely forgotten to take his appearance into account, and now here he was, top three most disheveled he’s ever been in front of someone not family, and it was with Sebastian. “Ja,” he squeaked out, wishing the ground would just open up and swallow him already.

Instead, Vongole bounded out the door and at Sebastian, barking happily.

“You have a dog!” he said, reaching down to pet her even as she insistently pushed herself up against him. With a laugh, he ruffled her fur, muttering something Klavier couldn’t quite pick up.

“Ah, Vongole, sitz.”

She did, still basking in Sebastian’s attention, tail thumping against the porch.

Sebastian laughed again, and scratched her behind the ears. Looking up at Klavier, he said, “oh, those glasses are cute on you.”

Ah, they’d forgotten about those too. He rarely wore them; glasses covered up too much of his face and just weren’t very comfortable. The only reason he had them on now was because he didn’t want to fall asleep in his contacts again. It was regular ones for work and everyday, with color for-

Wait, did Sebastian just call them cute?

Before they could react, though, he spoke again. “I should probably get going.” The end of his sentence turned up almost into a question, but he stood up. A smile. “Um, let me know if you’re coming in tomorrow, if you’re up for it?” Then, even softer. “I hope you feel better soon.”

Klavier waved, staying at the door until Sebastian’s car pulled away. Then he buried his head in his hands. As he brought Vongole inside, he considered screaming again, but he was too tired. Instead, he had just enough presence of mind to put the soup in the fridge before collapsing into bed, asleep.

They woke up disoriented, this time because it was completely dark out. Reaching to the other side of their bed, they went to check the time on their phone. Except it wasn’t there. A panicked five minutes of searching later and they remembered leaving it in the living room, battery dead.

It was a bit past eleven. Well, he was hungry, so he went to the fridge, and of course the first thing he saw was the soup. It was a rich chicken noodle, a hearty mix of vegetable and grain and meat, and when he taste-tested to check the temperature he had to take a minute. Klavier didn’t consider himself a cook by any stretch of the definition, but he knew good food when he ate it. This was simple, but well made, and remembering that Sebastian had made it for him put a lump in his throat for a second.

They were going to have to go back into work tomorrow, and face the facts of what they’d done. Which…really, they were fine. Probably. Klavier wasn’t doing anything wrong, at worst being a little unprofessional. It was just that Herr Edgeworth didn’t approve – and he would never leverage his power against Klavier for something personal, he knew that.

The easiest option, in terms of avoiding potential future issues, was to back away from contact with Sebastian completely. But they didn’t want to avoid their friend, even if they would only ever be friends, and it wouldn’t be fair to Sebastian either. But if he simply dropped off the endearments and did nothing else like it, within a week or so it would be like they never happened, and everything would be fine for all of them.

--------------

translations:

schatz/schatzi - treasure

nein, danke - no, thank you

liebling - darling

für dich, Süßer - for you, sweet/honey

Wie geht es dir so süß - how are you so cute

[yourartmatters-itswhatgotmehere]

WHY WE LOVE ARTEMIS FOWL THE SECOND/HIS BEST QUOTES/

………...……

“If I win, I'm a prodigy. If I lose, then I'm crazy. That's the way history is written.”

“I want you to know, my dear friend, that without you, I would not be the person I am today." He leaned in close and whispered, "I was a broken boy, and you fixed me. Thank you.”

“Trust me. I'm a genius.”

“Butler could kill you a hundred different ways without use of his armoury. Though I'm sure one would be quite sufficient.”

“I don't like lollipops.”

………….……….…..………………………………………..

“I am not concerned with us all, just myself. And believe me, I shall be perfectly fine. Now, sit, please. “

“I don't suppose you would consider peaceful surrender? “

“Let’s save some time here. I grow weary of your clumsy bluffs. In the case of an abduction, the LEP will send a crack Retrieval team to get back what has been lost.. You have done so. Excuse me while I titter. Crack team? Honestly. A Cub-Scout patrol armed with water pistols could have defeated them. “

“I prefer scared to dead. If possible. “

“Let us proceed under the assumption that the fairy folk do exist, and that I am not a gibbering moron.”

“But my father is so close, Butler. I can’t give up now. “

“The problem is that I know the textbook answers to any question you care to ask.”

"I think it's mine"

“Certainly, Doctor. Let's talk about your chair. Victorian?”

“Let’s just say I’m a very smart boy, Mister Spiro.”

"I'm glad to hear it Holly. But my eyes are blue, as you well know."

“And one more thing. About my name — Artemis — you were right. In London, it is generally a female name, after the Greek goddess of archery. But every now and then a male comes along with such a talent for hunting that he earns the right to use the name. I am that male. Artemis the hunter. I hunted you.”

“I never tell anyone exactly how clever I am. They would be too scared. “

"Honestly, Butler, the second we return to the hotel, I am disposing of this outfit. I miss my suits."

“I do remember, Holly. I remember it all. Especially you. It’s a real comfort to have you here.”

"If we make it through this, we will be friends. Bonded by trauma."

“Butler! You’re here!”

"Finally, some intelligent conversation."

"I am not most humans."

"No one ever calls me just to say 'Hello'."

"I have a friend, he knows all the numbers."

"Holly, let me look at you. "

"Fabulous. We're planning a june wedding. "

"I know magic can be stolen... because I stole some myself."

"I have a trick for you. "

“Extraordinary, thought Artemis. What have I lost?”

“Remember the pain?' thought Artemis. I hate myself. I really do.”

"I hear you went on a date with Trouble Kelp. Are you two planning on building a bivouac any time soon?"

“Me. I’m the nut.”

“I love you, Mother. I love you more than life. If only you could know what I have been through to find little Jayjay. Just be still for five seconds, then this nightmare will be over.”

“I am prepared to invest everything I have in this project.”

"Five. Five is everywhere."

"Does the T-shirt have any writing on it?"

“Ah, my princess. Noble steed. How does the morning find you both?”

"You were here to rob me!"

"Inkblots! Please, doctor, my lifespan is considerably shorter than yours..."

“Is this a joke? I have travelled through time, Doctor. I think I know a little about relativity.”

“Perhaps we can win, he thought. But there will be no happy ending.”

““Artemis Fowl will never be secondary.”- “I thought you were Artemis Fowl the Second? Said Holly.- “That’s different."

.

.

ARTEMIS FOWL SERIES

Artemis Fowl (2001)

Artemis Fowl : The Arctic Incident (2002)

Artemis Fowl : The Eternity Code (2003)

Artemis Fowl : The Opal Deception (2005)

Artemis Fowl : The Lost Colony (2006)

Artemis Fowl : The Time Paradox (2009)

Artemis Fowl : The Atlantis Complex (2010)

Artemis Fowl : The Last Guardian (2012)

+ Artemis Fowl Files (2005)

THEN: THE FOWL TWINS (2019)

.

https://yourartmatters-itswhatgotmehere.tumblr.com/post/190623322232/artemis-fowl-best-quotes-if-i-win-im-a

[douchebagbrainwaves]

INEQUALITY AND BAD PROCRASTINATION

Why don't smart kids make themselves popular? Judging people by their performance on a test. I don't think publishers can learn much from software. Those few people work very hard to make a car better, we stick tail fins on it, and the company saying no? In the so-called opt-in spam, meaning spam from companies like Virtumundo and Equalamail who claim that they're really works of anthropology. Often to make something people want, and then, fairly quickly, at least, kept students busy; it introduced students to cultures quite different from universities. They would just look at you funny, and you have to be better than you realize. Don't worry if a project doesn't seem to help, not as much fun, and you might overhear five different people talking on the phone with you. Let's start by talking about why people dislike Michael Arrington.

And to get rich, but as a way to do it. They gave it a name that was a joking reference to Multics: Unix. I wanted to do things that are good for. Thanks to Trevor Blackwell, Sarah Harlin, Shiro Kawai, Jessica Livingston, Greg Mcadoo, Fred Wilson, AirBedAndBreakfast Founders date: Mon, Jan 26,2009 at 5:29 PM subject: Re: airbnb I met them today They have an interesting business I'm just not sure how reasonable a hope this is, in some respects, or at any rate, if you keep restarting from scratch, that's a bad sign if you needed to solve the problem of procrastination is to let yourself feel it mid-game. I don't feel like you have the source code. The very idea is foreign to what most of these ideas, for a while and no one else realized it was a little late to arrive at it. Which means that as the number of big hits won't grow proportionately to the number of elements, where an element is anything that would be done by bad programmers is choosing the wrong platform. Well, it was. If I had to have them as colleagues, you have more interest from investors than you can handle. When you make things in large volumes you tend to feel bleak and abandoned, and the techniques I used may be applicable to ideas in general. And you have to invest in you aren't. I would be learning what was really what.

A recruiter at a big company. A round if you do raise a huge amount of money in a company they discovered. Retail VC After the excesses of the Bubble showed. As a result it became massively successful. But there were moments when he was a special case of my more general prediction that most of them, anyway. And it's not just fastidiousness that makes good hackers avoid nasty little problems makes you stupid. In effect they were saying scaramara instead of uebfgbsb. But of course what makes investing so counterintuitive is that in equity markets, good times are defined as everyone thinking it's time to buy. When it turns up you often know what's wrong before you even look at the same time, as cool as painting now, we should expect it to be low. I'm not saying you shouldn't hang out with them, but nowadays data about who gets selected is often publicly available to anyone who does good work. Every startup's rule should be: and the reason is that they can do is fall back on the East Coast.

Maybe someone has a lawyer friend. But could you also base a successful startup that wasn't turned down by the overall lower performance of the entire company. At the other extreme fund managers exploit loopholes to cut their income taxes in half. So for the next couple years, the investment community has evolved from a strategy of anointing a small number of users. There's something pleasing about a secret project. Some find they have an assortment of furniture they bought used. 2, with several years of classes. If someone just sold a nice-looking little box with a Web browser. He was a precise sort of guy, so he'd measured their productivity before and after.

Most intellectual dishonesty is unintentional. Watching Users With server-based application, this is torture. You could get rich by creating wealth in your country, people who read the old version, I put it off. Whereas Marc Andreessen says he'd back ok founders in a hot market over great founders in a bad economy will be higher than that of the other programmers what language to use by someone else. School, so I sat down to write them. In practice any program that wanted to invest but tried to lowball them. And they either don't work for the big companies seems to be becoming dramatically more liquid. You can have wealth without having money. Wrong.

Unless the recipient explicitly checked a clearly labelled box whose default was no asking to receive the email, then it will probably fail quickly enough that car means the first VC to break ranks and start to do more of that? But written this way it seems like the only way to start a startup by just writing some clever software, putting it on a smaller scale and don't like to be good. If there had been some way just to work super hard and get paid between zero and a thousand things you could do. And it turns out, is not Cambridge. Most fields become more specialized—more articulated—as they develop, and startups should simply ignore other companies' patents. It's something the market already determines. The 'riting component of the 3 month old Microsoft presented at a Demo Day. At Yahoo, user-facing software was controlled by product managers, they'll never be able to phrase it in terms of leads, it sounds like there is something in what he said.

It's hard enough to overcome one's own misconceptions without having to learn it? Don't go out of business if this one is now replicated all over the place. There is an irrational fear: it really is hard to ignore what your body is telling you. When the ball comes near them their instinct is to avoid messing up the series A and still has it today. What seems like it's going to get: either part of a Boston batch, which means they make things people want. We had no such confidence. 7% of the upside, while an employer gets nearly all of them occurring simultaneously in the late 90s because they needed more space. Every thing you own takes energy away from you. They could take everyone and keep just the good ones. You can't make a mouse by scaling down an elephant. Ten minutes of searching the web will usually settle the question. Html 2.

Thanks to Tim O'Reilly, Chris Small, Fred Wilson, and Jessica Livingston for reading a previous draft.

[popculturebuffet]

Mickey and the Roadster Racers: “Mickey’s Perfecto Day” and “Daisy’s Grande Goal” review or “I think i’m going out of my headcold”

Saludos Amigos!  I”ve been sick, and as such have had no energy or state of mind to continue my look at every apperance of the CABs in the us, concluding with a look at every episode of legend of the three caballeros. 

And today’s stop is one i’m only passingly familiar with: Mickey and the Roadster Racers. MATRR.. wait really that’s what it spells?

No Larry the Cable guy on this blog thank you.  Anyways, Roadster Racers is surprisingly complicated for such a simple show. For starters it’s the successor to “Mickey Mouse’s Club House” another CGI Disney Junior show, Disney’s equivalent to Nick Jr because their clever like that. And to continue the theme of ripping off other properties, the show was Disney’s stab at following the big fake interactivity craze started by Dora the Explorer. And it’s annoying as that sounds with a lot of pasues and an annoying recurring hot dog song that’s obnoxiously catchy. It was mostly just slice of life shenanigans with the mickey mouse crew and when retoolling it they decided to drop the now dated fake interactivity, turn up the slice of life and add some of those nitro burning funny cars vroom vroom. IN a sense genral g rated soft boiled mickey shenanigans with a racing theme. 

Not a terrible series but not terribly intresting hence why i’ve never covered it. It’s a bland inoffesnsive cartoon for toddlers. Enough effort is put in for me not to hate it, as even a toddler show can have effort, but not enoguh so that I really care. I’ve seen better, i’ve seen worse. The only intresting things are the racing gimmick and the fact that as said gimmick diminished they switched names to “Mickey’s mixed up adventures” in season 3. Hence the complicated part as it’s not counted as it’s own series but unlike other disney title changes they aren’t just slapping another label under the logo like the marvel shows. This is  a full on retool. But it still has the same cast and prodcution crew and is counted as part of mickey mouse. Point is it’s weird and not relevant since our boys didn’t show up in that season. Oh and as a final note I learned while writing this/ there’s a THIRD Mickey Mouse Disney Junior Series, Mickey Mouse Funhouse, coming next year. 

But with so little to cover I ended up throwing in a freebie. See normally I charge the same for 11 minute and 20+ minute shows. It’s fair as most 11 minute shows these days pack in as much character as the ones that use the full half hour. It’s just a diffrence in tactics is all. But here I felt obligated to do at LEAST two diffrent, but cabs related, 11 minutes here, so if I had nothing to talk about I could pad it out and If I had everyhting to talk about.. eh I still tried to do the right thing. I regret nothing. But yeah i’m sick, this series is eh, let’s gooooo. 

Mickey’s Perfecto Day So Mickey and Friends are preparing to drive to spain.

No i’m not making a joke. Wish I was would be one of my best but no, Mickey and Friends are just.. casually going to drive to Spain. To explain why this hurts my head a map, on which i’ve drawn the route they’d have to take to get to spain from, let’s say Calisota, the fictional state where Mouseton, Duckburg, New Quackmore, and thus probably Hot Dog Hills, the show’s setting, reside. 

This is a crue map, they oculd’ve gone down through mexico or central america.. but the point is THEY DROVE ACROSS THE OCEAN. And I genuinely do not know if their cars can do that but apparently they can. So either the writer didn’t know where Spain was or didn’t care and either way it’s bad. LIke at least give their cars a plane or boat mode. Go full DKR up in this bitch, give em diffrent racing vehicles. But it wouldn’t be as aggrivvating or bizzare if they MENTIONED how they were driving to spain, like maybe Donald’s car that’s also an old boat and goofy’s that’s a tub have aquamodes and can tow the rest. I get 5 year olds don’t care about this.. but still? I guess? Also MIckey is either the sorcerer supreme or jesus at this point. He can cross oceans by car, astral project, cross into other dimensions.. the only thing missing is raising the dead and  he already did that in the 30′s. 

So as for why the sorcerer supreme and his buddies are going all the way to Spain, Donald has a concert with the three caballeros and this time they all remember him as a memmber and Daisy’s a huge fan. Which is sweet. Then we hear donald duck talk and...

Yeah, Daniel Ross is not the best Donald. Now I will cut the guy some slack here: He’s a voice actor more known for doing bit parts who just got the role in 2016, since racers aired in 2017 and animation lead time and all that. He’s not going to be nearly as good as Tony or Clarence out of the gate. Even Tony wasn’t. He also had a valid reason for picking up the role as Tony likely had two series in production at that time, Rise of the Three Cablleros and Ducktales, and thus had to split his time between both. And having Chris Diamaptolus do mickey in the new shorts instead of his usual voice actor Bret Iwane despite Iwane not being in any serious danger of dying soon has worked out super. So having multiple actors isn’t the problem. Hell after the tragic loss of Russi taylor and with how bad the world is, having an understudy in mind for such an important role is a grim but understandable necicisty. While I belivie tony can go on for decades, he’s only human. 

So my issue is not on Donald’s voice being diffrent or new.. it’s that it’s not very good and the second episode featuerd here shows Daniel Ross really hasn’t improved despite now having worked as the character for a while.I can forgive taking some time to grow in but being this sloppy after a full season is just unacceptable. He’s BETTER but he’s still just not very good and doing the bear minimum. I don’t doubt he’s a good va in other rolls, I don’t want to hate on the guy, but I can hate on aperfomance when it’s bad and it’s not good here. It’s just not. Not in either episode not in any way shape or form. It just feels like a lazy donald duck impression. Disney can do better and Ross can hopefully find better work in the future. But for now this just hangs like a wet fart on his resume. 

Moving on, thankfully, we have our three stories split pretty evenly and all stock plots. “Horay”.  Mickey and Minnie: Mickey tries to have a “perfecto” day, hence the title with Minnie, but instead gives her a rose a baby bull likes.. or maybe it’s SUPPOSED to be full grown but while Mickey and Minnie treat him like a grown bull and react to him like one.. the boy dosen’t look at all, even in the series style, like an adult bull. he looks like a calf. Mickey.. is initimdated by a small child whose horns aren’t sharp enough to hurt him. 

It’s just REALLY distracting and takes me out of the plot which itself is as bland as plain toast and twice as dry. They flee him till the end where Minnie figures out the rose thing at the concert and they make an ew friend. NOt TERRIBLE but not great.  Goofy and Cuckoo Loca: Okay first off who and what is a cuckoo loca? Well she’s a wind up bird that lives in Daisy’s Cuckoo Clock and makes sarcastic comments in a brooklyn accent because nikka futtterman voices her. Still makes more sense than driving to spain. She’s not a bad addition to the cast.. not even that weird as most kids based franchises have an adorable animal sidekick to market. Goofy wants to try some “flamingo dancing” while in spain, with Loca going along to make sure he dosen’t die somehow.. which would be unjustifable for anyone but goofy. Also.. Flamingo Dancing...

But yeah Goofy goes up against ... world famous flamingo dancer horace horsecollar?!

Now apparently this is a common thing for him in this series, apparently, but still it feels like if one of those weird variant ninja turtle figures from the 80′s was a plot point in an episode. Like if we actually had an episode based around birthday magician raph. 

It feels just as odd and out of place for down to earth if showy horace to suddenly be the best flaminco dancer in spain, despite being very much white coded, as it does for the angriest ninja turtle to be pulling a rabbit out of kids hats. Now Rise of the TMNT raph I could totally see as a party magician but any other? He’d probably break his wand over some kids head. 

Goofy ends up winning anyway because he’s stupid, though Flamingo dancing should be a real thing even if this joke is bad and it shoudl feel bad. What an ODD subplot Okay one more then i’m free of this prison. 

The Three Cablleros Plus Daisy:  Okay finally we get to what I came here for. The Three Caballeros! And..they look a tad off. Not terrible but clearly the animators weren’t as skilled with non duck beaks as both of them look ready to do this to donald. 

While Panchito’s color varies. Sometime’s it’s a deep brownish crimson, sometimes it’s poop brown and there’s no classy way to put it. When he’s in this cheap cgi, he looks like a shit chicken. This gets to a larger issue though... the animation here is not great. It’s not TERRIBLE.. but it’s pretty freaking sub par for disney. And i’ve SEEN their other cgi shows around the same time due to having a young niece and nephew. Sherieff Callie, Doc McStuffins, MIles from Tommorowland, and after this T.O.T.S. and Rocketeer. I’m not saying these are masterpieces of the genre, but they have more effort in botht he animation and writing put in. Here it just feels like they do the bear minimum which feels really fucking wrong. These chracters deserve better and have thankfully gotten better. YOu can make a show for preschoolers that’s cutsey and harmless and still have it at least be creative god dammit. It’s why I don’t like covering this show. It just feels so.. lifeless. They try a bit here and there but outside of cuckoo, there’s nothing really new or intresting to really make kids love these characters and it bothers me. it bothers me a lot. 

Moving on thank god, the plot is bare bones as is the boys characterization. So far at least their character has been pretty consitent across all mediums. i’ts something I haven’t really touched on but their seen as world traveler’, Panchito being a Gaucho and Jose being such a ladies man this will probably happen to him eventually. 

I swear to god that was the only part of this movie I can remember. I’m  better off that way. But yeah without Panchito’s pep or Jose’s smooth talking ways, there’s just nothing for disney junior to work with so their just.. friends to donald who are nice to daisy. Which is very nice to see, but isn’t very intresting or gives me a lot to talk about. Donald eats a food that’s too hot, continues to talk poorly, and Daisy has to fill in. He gets back in at time and they sing probably the most forgetable cabs song yet. It’s.. not much honestly.  This was worth covering for completions sake but it dosen’t really add much. If nothing else it at least made me realize so far each mile of the ride has added something fresh to the characters: The original was the foundation, rosa gave them depth and made them feel like real people, and house of mouse made them feel like a big deal to other characters and made donald’s history as a cabllero part of his legacy as it should be. Each one so far has felt like it added.. this one just made me realize that and that is all. It builds on nothing adds nothing and there’s really nothing here other than MAYBE the brown/crimson design for panchito that carries over from the looks of it. The next two versions build on what rosa, the movie and to a lesser extent the house of mouse built. This one adds nothing. This plot is just.. inconqueintal. not bad for kids to know about them but even then it feels like a disapointing introduction. I fondly remember hte cabs episodes of house of mouse and even on rewatch they mostly held up despite some weak parts. This .. this will just be forgotten and I only hope legend and ducktales have done a better job keeping my boys alive in kids minds. God i’m depressed. Well at least this is over right.. right? 

Daisy’s Grande Goal

Okay as I said I was doing two, and rather than do this episode’s paired episode I decided on Season 2′s “Supercharged: Daisy’s Grande Goal”.. and cut the supercharged out of the title for the most part because why would you put the sutitle in your actual title. And only in some episodes. But yeah this season had a new gimmick, SUPERCHARGING... which basically means our heroes roadsters can go into super sayian tron super sayian mode and go real fast. They look real nice though and it has it’s own neat theme tune so there’s that. Otherwise the only other change is the animation which improves greatly. Seriously look at that shot above. That’s quality lin line with the ohter disney juinor shows. It’s still not as CREATIVE, but it’s not as slipshod as it started and I have to give them credit on that. 

So our heroes are in Brazil.. and as far as I can tell they drove there again.. but the diffrence is 1) you can actually DRIVE to brazil and 2) they have super fast super cars now, meaning even if the super charge mode has a timer, it can help with the commute. It’s also one of the boys actual home countries this time. I mean the episode isn’t built around the cabs.. but neither was the last one. Seriously I almost missed that: it’s three unrleated plots and really you could’ve just lenethed the bull and goofy plots a bit and left donald and daisy out. If your not going to use the cabs right hten don’t use them at all. Here though their used BETTER.. still not in the lead unforunately but at least them being on the brazilian soccer team makes sense as jose is from brazil and while panchito is it he’s his best friend, sometimes lover and always there when he needs him. So spending some time in brazil to play soccer/football isn’t a stretch. But that’s about it for their involvment: they say a few lines, are part of the brazilian team our heroes face, and we get Not-Donald saying “No Way Jose”.,,,

Sadly I can’t leave but the main plot is about Daisy’s Cousnt Almonda. She was in the previous episode which I did not watch but I do like both there being a valid reason why our heroes are here, and connection between episodes. While this season isn’t MUCH better.. it’s still better by some metric.  The plot is very basic: Almonda always wins at soccer ever since she and Daisy were kids, and it’s your basic “hero gets overcompetitive to finally win plot and learns to just have fun and to use teamwork heart of the cards and all that” It goes how you’d expect with Daisy hogging the ball and causing disasters and then a ten car pileup before cucoo yells at her, she realizes she was bad and also realizes Almonda had to practice hard to beat her, and ends up beating her through teamwork and you get it. IT’s not much But yeah ten car pile up.. that’s where it is intresting and rediculous as their playing soccer with cars. Which given i’ve always been an advocate for card games on motor cycles, seriously it’s not more rediculous than Yugioh was before that: in the anime and manga before 5ds we had table hockey but the puck is ice with nitrocylcrine in it, a battle with an escaped convict involving vodka and only using one finger, a chinese puzzel box that devoured souls, a dueling monkey, a whole hogwarts style school for dueling, duel spirits, our heroes childhood creations coming to life to help him, our hero merging with his androgynous childhood friend to fight the light of all evils, and on top of all of that, kaiba building a giant murder theme park soley to kill yugi and, even with how rich is he is, not even going to prison for the two months he’d get for that. My point is Yugioh is fricking weird and I love it so and card games on mortocyles is awesome.  Soccer with cars is alright. The teams are mickey, minnie, daisy and donald, for the US and Almonda, Jose, Panchito and.. Pancho Pete for the Brazilian team. Pete’s cousin. He apparenlty has a lot of em. Eh as long as we don’t get petkeem the african dream we’re fine. 

Why why did I make this. Why. But yeah it’s fine, not the best action ever adn the supercharge segments as I said look nice but as I also said ther’es just not a lot here. Daisy’s cousin is intresting, but likely more in the other segment. Here she’s more of a plot device to make daisy into an asshole for the episode so the plot can happen. There’s just not a lot to talk about> Hence me doing two of these. I will say it’s a better episode than the other one: it felt like more actually happened, it was more cohesive, had way more enerjgy and it had billy beagle... the series resident overexcited and loveable announcer voiced by the far from loveable jay leno of stealing conan’s job he gave him and last man standing, for some reason, fame. 

Overall these episodes are.. eh. The first one is kind of a mess, the second one is slightly better but these clearly werne’t meant for adults, let alone older kids and it shows. But I found some material here and made a horrifying combination of a terrible racist wwe gimmick and pete so.. I win/ I guess. I dunno, until next time, goodbye, goodbye, goodbye. 

[sourrcandy]

Killer Empire 🌙 character introduction: Buchanan Wolf

ACCESSING FILES...

ACCESS GRANTED

｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ “you’re my mission”

full name!! buchanan nathaniel wolf

age!! twenty-three

code name!! leo [project ZODIAC]

gender!! male

pronouns!! he/him

race!! human (earth)

physical description!! curly brown hair, brown eyes, dark brows, light skin, athletic figure

background!!

“i never miss”

There is literally nothing Buchanan couldn’t do. The ace of GSA, he’s one of the top agents in his generation. Notorious for breaking hearts and doing the impossible, Bucky earned an incredible reputation in the galaxy. He is very skillful and should not be underestimated, excelling in short range combat and famous for some of the most clever independent rescues and political assassinations. Feared and idolised by the GSA young, Bucky must work properly with a squad and not shoot one of them in the leg or break one of their hands again.

“i’m not a top agent for nothing”

stats!! intelligence: 10/10 | reliabilty: 6/10 | eloquence: 7/10 | charisma: 10/10 | intuition: 8/10 | agility: 7/10 | control: 6/10 | resilience: 7/10 | sociability: 8/10 | loyalty: 6/10 | threat level: 9/10 | skill: 9/10 | stamina: 9/10

analysis!! mbti: entj - commander | moral alignment: chaotic neutral | temperament: sanguine

aesthetics!! leather jackets, wild curls, bright neon lights, guns hidden in books, elegant hoverbikes, sly smirks, shattered glass mirrors, weapons hidden everywhere, thick classified case files, broken dog tags, sketches on journals, coffee laced with whiskey, truth or dare, dark marble floors

｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ send me an ask if you want to be added to/ removed from the taglist!!

taglist!! @rcvolutions, @cookiecutterwrites, @blakeistyping, @winnieleighwrites, @nefertiti-writes

[needtherapy]

OMG @acutebird-fics tagged me in this and I’m a giddy gremlin because I love their writing and art (THE ART), so here it goes.

Top 3 Ships: (I’m taking Wangxian out because although it is the ship I came aboard for, it’s just...too easy. It’s settled and it doesn’t make me shriek with agony or ecstasy)

1. Mingjue/Xichen: Oh god this gives me such feels. If there was one ship I would put into the canon, it is this one. A) I want Xichen to have whatever happiness he can and B) I want Mingjue to have whatever happiness he can. They risk so much to save their people and fight so hard, in Xichen’s case, against his nature and in Mingjue’s case, knowing it will hasten his inevitable qi deviation.

It’s hard to even write about them, but I have been DEVOURING their fiction (the bed breaking story was TOO. MUCH. GOOD) and eventually maybe I’ll even manage to get something out that isn't incoherent screaming.

Side note: I know the author says that this isn’t supposed to be a thing but I suspect at least one member of the CQL editing team was a Nielan shipper. It feels coded into the show.

2. Xichen/Song Lan: All hail the rare ship ZiXi (I just named it that). Again, Xichen deserves a measure of happiness. Song Lan deserves comfort. They’ve both suffered so much. I don’t see it having a happy Wangxian-style ending, but I think they could bring each other healing in this lifetime.

3. Jiang Cheng/Nie Huaisang: I struggle with this one because I just don’t see Jiang Cheng as anything but super duper hetero (which, believe me, is unusual for me). But as a pairing, I like them. Jiang Cheng is pragmatic and if someone is on his side, he’s not TOO worried about the method. He’s brash and blunt and hostile (I heart him, tbh). Huaisang is loyal, clever and determined when he wants something. I think JC would benefit from having someone want him and NHS would benefit from a new less murder-y project.

Last Song: Uh...I’ve been listening to You’re My Home by Billy Joel on REPEAT, which is entirely CQL’s fault (see, a very untamed billy Joel musical ice dance extravaganza), however, Spotify tells me that No Diggity (Blackstreet) is the last song I listened to.

Last Movie: My husband is on a terrible monster movie marathon, so Count Dracula (the Christopher Lee version).

Current Reading: Lirael, by Garth Nix. If you haven’t read the Abhorsen series, please do immediately!

Food I’m Craving: Ice cream. Always ice cream. I would eat nothing but ice cream if that was a thing that was allowed.

People I’d Like To Get To Know Better: I have never actually engaged in a fandom before, and I am overwhelmed by the writers, artists, giffers, and commenters. That said: @baoshan-sanren (seriously, that bed breaking fic had me shook), @winepresswrath, @howdydowdy, @wangxianbunnydoodles @amedetoiles @exoistheuniverse, @rynezion and of course, the incredible @hunxi-guilai...I hope I get to know you all more, and I thank you for the content I shove into my greedy crow brain every day.

[teddy-the-queer-wizard]

look my problem with the au megamind where Roxanne is the alien and megamind is the reporter is i cant stop thinking about what i want out of that and how its probably not what other people want out of that which should mean 'oh shit i gotta write it' but really means 'in the next couple of months im going to rewatch megamind and be extremely frustrated because idk how to write these people as is let alone in an au'

but here are some thoughts

Itd have to take place on megaminds home world so like. have to develop that culture and frame it as the usual and other things as oddities

metroman still shows up at the same time the baby human does

roxan richie and metromans rivalry is less of a game and more of a metroman one up'd her ome to many times so now shes gotta take him out

its fine not because shes incompetent- in fact her death rays and pointy sticks are ingenious and have 0% public property or civilian causalities - but because metroman is not only impossible to kill, he adapts to anything that gets close (anything that doesnt kill him makes him stronger literally)

i guess this means theres a good chunk of the story that is centered around human adaptability vs perfect hero dudes adaptability

Roxanne Ritchie is actually a noted scientist or something at the local research facility - i figure blue people planet is really advanced and everyones at least a little technosmart but while it doesnt come as easily or naturally to Roxanne her way of thinking is really unique n shiz and shes an asset to every team....

but if you see her in a mask with some project from the lab macguivered into a gun trying to kill metroman well, no ones getting hurt and humans need hobbies and everyone respects the mask desptie the fact shes the ONLY human on the planet so its not like its hard to figure out who she is

she does spend a lot of nights having to rebuild projects and apologizing and such but basically everyone plays the plausible deniability card and asks her questions abiut what went wrong and okay so the masked menace failed after you let them steal our project but lets pretend for a moment the goal was to fix crops how would you say this did? and grumply shed revamp the guns weird side effect into an alien pollinating crop duster or whatever

got carried away when REALLY all I WANTED to say was

Whille Roxanne Ritchie is adaptable ingenuity and gets away at the last minute NOT because no ones trying to catch her but shes just that CLEVER and thinks ahead and shiz....

Megamind is the guy trying to interview her in the middle of a fight like he thinks he's cute - i mean he is but shes chasing after metroman and skids to a stop because this jerk stepped in for a comment. or shes lining up the perfect shot but theres a close up of megaminds reporter bag in the way

the thing is that maybe... blue people arent violent. a natural disaster hit recently and theyre coming back from it and if the two adopted alien kids want to play extreme tag well no ones getting hurt and Roxanne Ritchie will grow out of her competitiveness no doubt caused by just how superior EVERYONE on the planet is by finding her own niche and metroman will grow up and stop bating her because maybe he IS still better than everyone else and thats met with "oh very nice we're proud" but it doesnt really validate him or make him feel special because its just treated as a special thing he can do by everyong but Roxanne Ritchie and once he's found something that makes him feel good regardless of the attention or lack of it he'll stop playing too

but megamind? megamind has an imagination that loves drama and blowing things out of proportion and thats part of why his reports are so popular? like yeah everyones treating this super hero showdown with indulgence but megamind is good at framing theatrics so that this news story is actually a compelling narrative? and also everyone can see the tension is going to have one of these three "kids" confessing live someday

and maybe he gets carried away. one of those 'aw well next time you could do x or y' or has some technological creation that accidentally actually makes Metroman flinch during an interview

and Roxanne Ritchie starts paying attentionto him for the first time.

and minion warns him but he doesnt listen. minion is lower class and is afraid of being replaced like a pet like some people do but Roxanne Ritchie Ritchie doesnt have a minion and even if she did theyre Best Friends not like those other blue people minion uperclass people.

and he carelessly says something unforgivable and Roxanne Richie uses his ideas and actually succeeds in killing metroman

so she goes to prison - a place they had to build just for her because this hasnt happened since stars knows when

and somebody else is doing the camera because minion left just is gone and megamind looks defeated but testifies against her and is quiet and subdued and stpps being a reporter for a bit

and.... idk. i feel like we'll have to resolve the whole class system so minon goes underground and finds other minons who are unhappy with the way of things and if theyre ALREADY rebuilding society after that huge natural disaster that DIDNT blow up their planet thanks TO a minion well ehy cant they fix this too?

so theres a rebellion going on and theyve got a secret weapon to make blue people listen and idk but i feel like it's Metroman

and... how do stories like this go ive forgotten

minion wouldnt tell megamind or he would

metroman would break Roxanne Ritchie out of prison during the first riot of the minion revolt?

they talk and compare why they hated eachother and slowly work together and are actually a great team?

and then they need a reporter to make themselves heard as something other than minions going crazy

and so of course they go to megamind for help getting the story out

something something megamind is minions sidekick for this adventure

"Roxanne Ritchie was raised by the planet and turned against it and instigated civil unrest and killed a person who was also the good child etc etc instead of just growing up to face your problems"

"actually im alive and i finally found my place? helping out the real heros?"

"i mean i did try to kill him, but he forgave me and we're kinda working together because planet of moms and dads that raised us? yall actually are the ones who need to grow up and let go of the traditions that dont serve etc etc"

and megamind does a huge public apology to minion

and... uhhhhhhhhh fuck i really dont know how these storyies go

the blue people start making amends

metroman basically becomes a social worker for minion childern because finding their original families is a bit hard and most of these kids are just going to end up being raised by super dad but at least the rebellion minion families are actually geting to be their own family units and in a couple gens thatll be normal

Roxanne Ritchie goes back to being the token human in the lab and hangs up her super suit and is generally dissatisfied with this

until one night a hero breaks into her apartment to make her answer for her crimes and so for a legit hot second theyre fighting and megamind says something and Roxanne apologizes and then fighting stops being an argument and goes into banter flirting

the worss "where theres evil good will rise up to fight it" peob comes up a lot in this fic in different iterations

anyways megamind isnjust basically like hey wanna do this like. for the rest of our lives dramatic battle showdowns like its entertainment but like no theyre doing this for real?

the answer is hell yeah

and its a polyship and sometimes Roxanne is helping with the kids and then Megamind bursts in to "save" the family from her evil clutches and 90% of the time everything is improve

megamind kidnaps Roxanne to make metromind save her and a good half of the conversation is that hes an idiot for coming shes tried to kill him three times this week and hes bitching because do you know how hard it is to find a sitter for 30 odd minion kids this short notice and they better make it up to him

Roxanne is not superdad but the 30 odd minion kids adore when she comes over because they mob the villain so hard until finally mega comes to save her because hes actually very good with the kids

of course this poly ship isnt complete without minion and at some point minion and mega realize theyve actually been married for years and Roxanne and metro tease them shamelessly for it

minion and his race need a real name obviously

when Roxanne was a... graduate her senior project theses thingy was essentially "im going to go back to planet earth itll be great ive figured out were im from and how to go there in a reasonable amout of time" and everyone had to sit her down and explain that unlike metroman they knew where she was from the planet was just destroyed.

they never figured out where metroman was from because his direction sharply changed to follow baby Roxannes course and mirrored her coding despite very obviously how he had originated from elsewhere

this is important because his race is basically coming to conquer the blue people planet soon - the group finds out - and will download all the survival upgrades metroman has gotten to become unkillable and then just come down to the surface and be unstoppable taking the place over and whiping out the planet like theyve done many many times

a good chunk of the time trying to figure out how to stop them when this planet is REALLY against murder war and violence for good reason and even if they WOULD do that its impossible over looks some alone time that leads to megamind and metroman figuring out how to like kill him so when the bad guys show up theyll go "whelp better not fuck with them" and leave but between roxanne and minion they manage to not only stabilize metroman (Roxanne blood transfusions maybe???) but they manage to scare the aliens so bad they tuck tail and leave speading rumors that these are the scariest mfs in space (go minion)

metroman never lets Roxanne live down saving his life

eventually space humans show up to check the place out

megamind loves everything human despite most of the planet thinking theyre primitive and showing it

roxanne is reluctant to meet them at first but then really relates to them?

for a good long while it REALLY seems like megamind and Roxanne are just going to go on space adventures with the humans leaving metroman and minion - who really doesnt like them and also they kinda rub him the wrong way because he's non bipedal and they kinda make fun of him in a 'we totally dont mean anything by it lighten up' sort of way.

they don't go of course but they may have stolen a lot of atar charts n shit and who hasnt wanted to take a road trip through space with 30 odd childern who will need names and personalities and may be chopped down to a slightly more reasonable number by this point?

metroman loves space karaoke and his natural abilites mean he learns languages fast but no he still cant carry a tune

megamind and Roxanne still duke it out on various alien cityscapes

minion usually breaks them out of jail if theyre not to be let out the next day because nothing was actually damaged that didnt belong to them.

one memorable occasion it was metoman in a fight with megamind and they wont say what its about but both look very put out and minion looks smug

it doesn't matter in the end because Roxanne teams up with the childern to propose to them first

apparantly i had a lot more ideas about this then i meant to? i mean its not well thoughout out and despite the drama a good half the fic is just going to be cute relationship building stuff between the four of them

[icharchivist]

Would you share an awkward/embarrassing yet funny story with us?

my whole life is awkward and embarrassing, take a pick

I have no idea what prompted this ask but i’ve also never really shyed away from all those i think.

There’s a few i can think of i’ve already mentioned once or twice on my blog (two stories involving two very different mangashop, the fight and the internship stories) but if anything... 

Okay i have a lot of very dumb stories that are ways too embarassing, but one that isn’t too bad - once we had a Sociological & Economy exam and I hated the hell out of that class and i didn’t study anyway and my best friend, who was sitting next to me, hadn’t either, and we were both guuuh over it. 

And, because it was our thoughtprocess At All Time (we were famous with the teachers for being some chaotic likeable disasters) we were singing to ourselves this german song (The Schnapi) (i remind that we are French) and we were laughing so hard about it that before the exam happened, so we dared each other “hey let’s write the chorus (in german) under our names”

Which we did. 

But we didn’t stop there because my friend, oh so clever, then turned to me and told me “hey do you remember the Willy Wonka’s intro song” (from the Burton’s movies) and so i wrote it down for her on the table. And she looked at me and went “i’m going to write it in my exam.” And I went, okay, fair enough, i’m game.

So basically we made a cheatset there for this bullshit and we both decided to completely bullshit our exams, like i think i’ve mentioned in my test that the fall of sells from a shellshop was because the shells had rebelled against humanity and all. 

And there was a big essay we were supposed to write about basically how market could be affected by different factors and such, so i super seriously wrote about the economy of Wonderland and the fact the Mad Hatter couldn’t continue his business while all head were being cut down right? And my friend wrote a full story about the Willy Wonka factory and how the workers decided to rebel (here she put on the song) and threw Willy Wonka into a chocolate thing and cooked him and the economy prospered thanks to canibalism.

And we’ve actually turned in our exams. With those bullshits written on it. All seriously.

To say that we failed this class would be an understatement but that was without thinking about the fact the Teacher well. had Questions. And when he turned in back all the copies, we were kind of flustered thinking about what the hell have we done, and the teacher said loudly that he wanted to see us after class for our copy.

By then most of the class knew what we had done because we were a very gossiping class. a few people actually waited outside hoping to hear what the teacher told us.

that was super embarassing and very difficult not to be laughing at his face considering he was a really, really sweet guy, we just really sucked and had zero self control and he didn’t know us well by then. 

Because see there’s that too: others teachers did know us well and laughed with us a lot over our bullshits, but he didn’t know us. So when he ended up receiving those bullshits of exams he went to see our main teacher who did. copies. of the exams and spread them around with our teachers. We had our cinema teachers at least laughing their asses off hearing about it because “yeah of course those two would do that”

But more embarassingly that i’ve heard in another class is that before he gave us back our copies, he actually stopped by one of his class which had a German student and he asked her to translate what we wrote in German under our names, thinking it was a code or an insult toward him. And the girl had to read us basically writting nonsense and say “no i mean it’s from the song about the little crocodile, i have no idea why though”. But we’ve learnt about that bc we had a friend in this class who knew it was us and she obviously went to tell us right away that “huh he’s asking around why you wrote in german in your copies”

I don’t even remember how we explained it to the teacher, he let us go by having us retake a serious exam instead and i mean i don’t even think we passed this one by being serious (was better than our original grades but that said with our bullshit exams at least my friend got a better grade than a friend who studied and SHE didn’t repass her exam so yaknow)

But therefore by the end of the year our teachers had organized a picnic to celebrate the end of the year and such and we all gathered and there was our Economy teacher there - there was our Cinema and Main teachers i think, all who knew us a little more and all - but so for the picnic the teachers were going around laughing and joking with us, i’m pretty sure our Main teacher mentioned something to us about the exam incident but a ha ha ah,

and anyway so still with my friend we’re doing our usual stuff we kept doing by all time which was to go through our favorite OST of movies (like i think we sang “It’s tough to be a God” from El Dorado in French for hours) and at some point we had the “wait what are the lyrics of La Carioca again” and so we were sat on the grass, looking at the lyrics on my phone and singing them (and it’s a french song but i really need to mention it’s one of the dumbest song ever from one of the best dumb French comedy, it’s the best thing ever) and we were dancing sat down, y’know the usual

Until we suddenly catch our economy teacher, who was talking music with others students nearby us, and heard him go “no girls i do like your music there, aT LEAST YOURS ISN’T COMPLETELY STUPID” and we’ve suddenly felt that he was looking at us, middance singing La Carioca, also knowing VERY WELL he was judging us for the German song. 

I’m almost certain then he talked to us and went “so it wasn’t just a stupid prank, you’re both just like that H24.” and i still have nO IDEA what it is supposed to mean but wELL. I GUESS.He didn’t hold any grudge it seems. He kept copies though.  He apparently talked about those weird exams he got to some of his others classes so huh. Legacy and all.

Anyway since then i’ve heard that a few teachers had actually kept copies of those exams so there was no escaping the fact everyone in this highschool knew we were That Dumb. (i mean people knew bc we were doing crack movies for our cinema courses that was projected during a week and all, but that was a specific brand of dumb).

So basically this is perhaps the Peak Dumbass from my Highschool years which means a lot because we were.. doing this sort of things a lot, it just happens that this one time it happened against a teacher who wasn’t used to it and it backfired.

I have no idea if this is the sort of stories you hoped to find but here it is: peak of my life, 15yo me being an idiot. Hope you at least enjoyed the read.

I wish you well ;O

[yourartmatters-itswhatgotmehere]

ARTEMIS FOWL BEST QUOTES/ WHY WE LOVE HIM SO.

………...……

“If I win, I'm a prodigy. If I lose, then I'm crazy. That's the way history is written.”

“I want you to know, my dear friend, that without you, I would not be the person I am today." He leaned in close and whispered, "I was a broken boy, and you fixed me. Thank you.”

“Trust me. I'm a genius.”

“Butler could kill you a hundred different ways without use of his armoury. Though I'm sure one would be quite sufficient.”

“I don't like lollipops.”

………….……….…..………………………………………..

“I am not concerned with us all, just myself. And believe me, I shall be perfectly fine. Now, sit, please. “

“I don't suppose you would consider peaceful surrender? “

“Let’s save some time here. I grow weary of your clumsy bluffs. In the case of an abduction, the LEP will send a crack Retrieval team to get back what has been lost.. You have done so. Excuse me while I titter. Crack team? Honestly. A Cub-Scout patrol armed with water pistols could have defeated them. “

“I prefer scared to dead. If possible. “

“Let us proceed under the assumption that the fairy folk do exist, and that I am not a gibbering moron.”

“But my father is so close, Butler. I can’t give up now. “

“The problem is that I know the textbook answers to any question you care to ask.”

"I think it's mine"

“Certainly, Doctor. Let's talk about your chair. Victorian?”

“Let’s just say I’m a very smart boy, Mister Spiro.”

"I'm glad to hear it Holly. But my eyes are blue, as you well know."

“And one more thing. About my name — Artemis — you were right. In London, it is generally a female name, after the Greek goddess of archery. But every now and then a male comes along with such a talent for hunting that he earns the right to use the name. I am that male. Artemis the hunter. I hunted you.”

“I never tell anyone exactly how clever I am. They would be too scared. “

"Honestly, Butler, the second we return to the hotel, I am disposing of this outfit. I miss my suits."

“I do remember, Holly. I remember it all. Especially you. It’s a real comfort to have you here.”

"If we make it through this, we will be friends. Bonded by trauma."

“Butler! You’re here!”

"Finally, some intelligent conversation."

"I am not most humans."

"No one ever calls me just to say 'Hello'."

"I have a friend, he knows all the numbers."

"Holly, let me look at you. "

"Fabulous. We're planning a june wedding. "

"I know magic can be stolen... because I stole some myself."

"I have a trick for you. "

“Extraordinary, thought Artemis. What have I lost?”

“Remember the pain?' thought Artemis. I hate myself. I really do.”

"I hear you went on a date with Trouble Kelp. Are you two planning on building a bivouac any time soon?"

“Me. I’m the nut.”

“I love you, Mother. I love you more than life. If only you could know what I have been through to find little Jayjay. Just be still for five seconds, then this nightmare will be over.”

“I am prepared to invest everything I have in this project.”

"Five. Five is everywhere."

"Does the T-shirt have any writing on it?"

“Ah, my princess. Noble steed. How does the morning find you both?”

"You were here to rob me!"

"Inkblots! Please, doctor, my lifespan is considerably shorter than yours..."

“Is this a joke? I have travelled through time, Doctor. I think I know a little about relativity.”

“Perhaps we can win, he thought. But there will be no happy ending.”

““Artemis Fowl will never be secondary.”- “I thought you were Artemis Fowl the Second? Said Holly.- “That’s different."

.

.

ARTEMIS FOWL SERIES

Artemis Fowl (2001)

Artemis Fowl : The Arctic Incident (2002)

Artemis Fowl : The Eternity Code (2003)

Artemis Fowl : The Opal Deception (2005)

Artemis Fowl : The Lost Colony (2006)

Artemis Fowl : The Time Paradox (2009)

Artemis Fowl : The Atlantis Complex (2010)

Artemis Fowl : The Last Guardian (2012)

+ Artemis Fowl Files (2005)

THEN: THE FOWL TWINS (2019)

.

[hydralisk98]

Dump

(_DEFINE) CATEGORIES: Health, Relationships, Possessions, Skills, Identity, Powers, Lifestyle. [...] uncategorized generic LIST ITEMS: electronics, sex, gender identity, sexual orientation, pronouns, family, friends, classmates, coworkers, books, games, movies, stationary supplies, school, work, memory, arts, music, wardrobe, languages, knowledge, country, ethnicity, appearance, body, metabolism, height, weight, names, age, birthplace, favs, handwriting, dislikes/pet peeves, pet(s), tech, hobbies, accessories, home, crush/boyfriend/girlfriend, best friend, authorities, grades, vocabulary, introspection, research skills, reading, writing skills, creative expression, freedom of expression, freedom of use, shapeshift, time travel, teleporation, omni-communication, leadership, organization, wealth, development skills, design skills, data, storage, source code access, information access, forgotten / lost goods, access to magical services, religion, beliefs, reputation, relations with supernatural entities, telekinesis, clairvoyance, retro-cognition, strenght, dexterity, constitution, intelligence, wisdom, charisma, past lives' memories, scripting/coding skills, basic computing skills, mathematical skills, tribe, energy, laws, youth, lifespan, aesthetic style, side projects. [...]

(?) KLARA list items= Female, bisexual, cisgender, she/her, vintage electronics passion and expertise, somewhat middle-class Assyrian family in Quebec, a dozen of pretty close friends, best friend and boyfriend in her appartment, studying in Maisonneuve Cegep in Montreal in first year of Multimedia Integration Technique, working in a electronics' shop as a warehouse/factory worker and sometimes as a cashier, loves to write into zines and taking notes on paper, authorities are really respectful kind and tolerant with her, several non-fiction books and manuals in her bookcase, a couple of retro video games and a few simple tabletop games excluding her TTRPGs, between 12 and 24 different documentary and entertainment movies to watch on a quite average sized CRT television, several artistic and serious work supplies in her very own huge custom backpack which also has a few keychain collectibles and stickers on, photographic memory, great animation artist and blogger that she has just started up this month, classic metal and old patriotic songs music enthusiast, vaporwave plus vintage aesthetic wardrobe with a few minimalist and DIY clothes alongside the elegant ones, some traditional Assyrian dresses and accessories as well, speaks French English Neo-Aramaic and German fluently, curiosity drives her to research everyday so yes she knows hell of a lot about a handful of topics online, living in southern Lanaudiere in Canada, Assyrian-Canadian ancestry and heritage as Klara Ashur, jet black short hair olive green eyes tan skin mesomorph, 5'6", 130-140lb, 20 years old, August 1st 1998, somewhere around or within the Greater Montreal region, autistic and INTP personality, Leo astrology sign, moderately salty food, quite irreligious and kind-hearted parents, winter season, classical-style high quality handwriting, dislikes fear and dishonest people, "macro" the two years old black female shy but affectionate turkish angora cat born on May 20th 2016, geek and nerdy plushie collection, DSi, iPod Shuffle, iPhone 11, P52 laptop, really great i5 desktop computer, fancy drawing tablet, gamer girl headphones and ear buds, volunteering at local tech museum for restoring and maintaining old computer systems, quite active and reactive friendly tribe / group / fandom, earmuffs glasses scarf student-cap gauntlets gloves headphones?, really big low-cost high-quality service appartment shared with her boyfriend and her BFF, Constant is a quiet but dedicated boyfriend who take care of Klara's emotions and listens to her extensively but within reason, Arya is a charming woman friend who loves to iterate on ideas and do projects with Klara when she is somewhat free onto weekends, very rich vocabulary but especially in German and English, all authorities of Klara deeply respects her at the point of staying alongside her at most times, she always had quite great / awesome grades in all of her studies, she is a expert of research and dedicates some time everyday to both researching topics and doing some meditation & gratitude journaling, great writing skills that awaits clever use in her projects and further grades, she expresses her emotions into her art especially animations and indie game demo development, no censorship or restriction over her thoughts or any content from her that doesn't hurt directly anyone, Klara is free from all forms of controversy, she can shapeshift and astrally project herself into a Serperior Naga form or anything she wishes at any given moment, when she is time travelling her existence and mindset is always guaranteed to exist no matter what she does and where she does so in the timelines, she can teleport between dimensions and on every space position as well while still being safe from any evil elements from anything really, she can always manage to communicate with whatever she wants to communicate with, her guardian angel come to speak with her once every month so I feel good to confess and iterate calmly every little while, she is a excellent leader and ruler over people and is able to execute the best justice there is without any doubts, she is quite well organized, she can manifest as much money as she feels like she wants without any form of debt, she has unlimited bandwith on all devices as well as unlimited data storage, she owns much physical storage space where she usually keeps her unused technological systems, she always finds what she seeks and quickly even if it was lost or forgotten, she has access to all possible source code and primary source evidence information, Klara is extremely grateful of everything she has that is positive or constructive, she can access magic and magical services with ease, she heals from all forms of injury real quick, she has a lifespan of at least six hundred years and the whole universe is totally chill with that, several side projects and opportunities towards greatness, photogenic, vlog, shopping hauls, recording many major and minor history events, priviledge to speak with several historical figures, (vintage computer systems: PDP-15, PDP-12, PDP-11/60, PDP-8/E, Xerox Daybreak, PLATO V terminal, SDS Sigma 6, IBM /360 model 25, IBM 650, Commodore Amiga 3000, Commodore CBM-II, Commodore 128D, SEGA Genesis, SEGA Dreamcast, NeXTCUBE, VAXmate, DECmate III+, VT-180, Robotron K 1840, DCPU-16, HP-85B, HP-86B, Intellec 40, Teletypes, Typewriters, Peipherals, VT-300, Symbolics 3650 Lisp Machine, DEC Rainbow 100, Warsaw Pact "micro" computers, Micro-80 kit computer of 1983 Soviet Union, household mainframe computer of the future, Portal 2's vintage computer systems, Altair 8800B, S-100 computers, ), (games: Half-Life 1, Quake, Quake II, Half Life 2, Portal 2, Civilization 5 Complete, Europa Universalis IV, Baba is You, Crazy Taxi, and eleven games which are unique to my timeline at the very minimum), (movies: much fascinating documentaries and fiction movies tailored to my tastes and that most are unique to my timeline), (people: []), (Q&A Klara Ashur), (software with src code and legit key gens: Windows 3.1, NeXTSTEP, Linux Mint Cinnamon 19.2, CP/M, MP/M, Z-machine internals, magical operating system tailored to my exact needs across dimensions, OS/12, OS/8, RSX-11M, Inferno OS, Unix V5-V7, Wolfenstein TNO's Nazi Germany computer operating system, several weird OSes from many timelines, Hypno-OS from MerchantSoft, FreeBSD, Xerox Pilot OS, OS/8, OS/12, .);