#10/10 expression also. this diva

[samuelwilsonbarnes]

this was so

[wumutummy]

Hyun is so gorgeous.

[j0urneymercies]

what would i do without you?

pairing: idol!mark lee x personal assistant! reader (afab)

genre: fluff??? mutual pining. "co-workers" to lovers.

summary: mark lee works hard, but you, his assistant, works harder... and eventually fell harder. what could possibly go wrong?

word count: 4167

A/N: I'm back writing! I just need to get this out before I can't anymore! hopefully, i could get more of the fics i had in my silly little head. i hope you enjoy! feedbacks & requests are highly appreciated here.

everyone knows that mark works hard. his overlapping schedules, back and forth international flights, photoshoots, brand events, concerts, guest appearances, studio recordings, group practices. you name it, he's experienced a combination of these events in just a day in a span of months. the whole world doesn't know how he does it. how mark is able to keep up with these ridiculous schedules and meetings without burning out. but you do. as his personal assistant you tried your best to keep up with his incessant schedule, to always brief him of his daily tasks and engagements, be it with his work or personal matters, you always try to stay on top of the list. trailing along with him and his manager all through out the day. dealing with menial tasks like picking up coffee after his 1pm lunch, preparing his travel documents before he leaves the country for another international brand event, preparing the studio before he gets there so he can record the songs he's been writing. don't get it wrong - mark is not a diva. he doesn't request all of these things to be prepared, but you thought that since he has a lot going on, you'd rather have these "tasks" done so he can focus on what's important. today is no different than any other day, you were trailing behind mark and his manager when you were giving him a rundown of the things he needs to get done today, with a clipboard in hand and a pencil at the other.

"so priority 1, today at 10:30 am, you need to head on over to the mixing studio, I one of the producers needs to re-record a specific part of your song. i blocked out your 12 - 1pm for your lunch, but you need to head back right away to the conference room with the dreamies to finalize the line up for the upcoming music festival, I'll have your afternoon coffee by then, so don't worry. they also want to practice right away, but I know you have your family dinner at around 7pm, so I already scheduled that with the restaurant, I also had those flowers sent to your mom today. you have a big day tomorrow with that brand photoshoot at 7am, so we'll pick you up tomorrow at around 5:45 so your ass can be in that makeup chair before 6:30 am."

it felt like you were spitting a verse with the laundry list of mark's tasks.

"and my day barely began. it's barely 10 am." mark just sighed as he looked at his phone to check the time. "9:54, I just got back from a music show recording. you think I could get some sleep in the studio? there's a couch there i think." he looked at you with a smile but his eyes says he's extremely tired.

"you could, but the studio is still not set up. don't worry, i'll get it prepared, you can get 30 mins to yourself." you make a note in your clipboard to pick up his recording essentials.

"thanks y/n. i can't do all these things without you." mark tapped your shoulder as he dragged himself to the recording studio. thank goodness he turned back right away before he can see the blush creeping up your face. he never failed to express his gratitude to you even if it's literally in your job description to be available in his every beck and call. to say that he was nice was an understatement, it feels like it's just in his nature to be good. even after reciting his crazy schedule, where he could have thrown a fit, he still manages to say "thank you, y/n" everytime. you wonder, maybe it's how he's raised. how his parents reminded him to be humble and always give thanks - he lived those words like it was his lifeline.

your thoughts were interupted by a sudden ping from your smartwatch, a text from mark's manager to get them water and snacks back to the studio, he needed to leave for another meeting. you were already on your way back, a tinge of annoyance visible on your face but you know he means well. after all, you've learned a lot from him and how he manages the group - hiring an personal assistant just for mark would make his job a lot easier, especially with his schedules. you gently knocked on the studio door and immediately saw mark curled up on the love seat, with his mouth slightly agape, the blanket around his frame sliding down. you'd have to agree that he looks too cute at this moment, it took everything from you to snap a picture of him sleeping. "be professional" you thought to yourself. however, you find yourself adjusting the blanket around his body to cover mark better. "is this still professional?" your heart was definitely racing at this point, if mark wasn't knocked out, he'd definitely hear how your heart is practically bolting out of your ribcage. Once done, you immediately jumped to exit the studio and sat down on one of the waiting chairs in the hallway, still clutching your heart, you wanted to rid yourself of the thoughts you had when you were so close to mark. you immediately opened your laptop and worked on your emails just so you could distract yourself from what just happened.

before you know it, the producer & sound engineers were already on their way to meet up with mark. 5 minutes to spare, so you gently opened the door and tapped mark's shoulder gently to wake him up.

"they're on their way in 5 minutes. drink up." you handed him a bottle of water, his hands gently grazing yours. you could feel your cheeks heating up again. "be calm, he barely touched your hand" you had to mentally recite that in your brain to keep yourself grounded.

"it's barely 30 minutes. are you sure i can't snooze for another 10 minutes?" he looked up to you with those puppy eyes as if you could do anything to stop time. hell, if you could, you would have, just for him.

"if it was for me, i'd give you my extra hours just so you could rest, but you had all these commitments lined up. the sooner we get them started, the faster we'd get them done, champ."

"you're as busy as i am." mark sighed as he gulps down the water you handed to him. "y/n, i can't thank you enough for keeping up with me" he grabbed your shoulder like he wanted to pull you in for a hug, but stopped midway when he realized what he was about to do. you looked at him, shocked at the sudden skinship. "oh sorry" he immediately slinked his arm fast and looked away. as if on cue, the producer opened the studio doors and walked straight to mark, giving him a dap and a hug all at once. you stood up and shook his hand with a bow as a sign of respect. mark immediately went straight to business mode and discussed with the producer about the changes to his song. he walked straight to the recording booth and you could hear him say to the mic "the sooner we get this started, the faster we'd get it done" he said while he sport a beaming smile. you just shook your head and smiled as you opened your laptop to continue to do some work.

------------------------------

it honestly felt like the day couldn't get any longer. mark's recording session dragged an additional 15 minutes. you kept motioning at your watch to speed things up but mark barely catches the hint especially when he's in the zone. you just sighed and slumped on the couch in defeat. that's 15 minutes away from his lunch time and yours. on top of that, you still need to pick up his 1pm coffee and get him to his meeting with the dreamies. eventually, mark came out of the booth and shook hands with the sound engineer & producer. he looked at you with a sheepish green and scratched the back of his head. "sorry, y/n. i really wanted to get it done today." you got out of the studio and mark followed suit. "it's fine, mark. i just don't want us to run behind schedule. you still have i don't know less than 45 minutes for lunch and then there's the line up meeting. I'll get you your coffee once you're in the conference room. go get lunch now, if you need me, i'll be at the cafeteria, just shoot me a text, okay?" you gave him a thumbs up as if you were waiting for him to return the gesture.

"wait, i'm eating alone?" mark was now sulky, the idea of eating lunch by himself never really sat right with him, of course there were times that he did, but those are rare. he usually ate with his manager or his members for lunch, like it was his way decompressing after a stressful day. you just sighed and pressed the elevator button, "you want to tag along? are you even okay with eating regular degular cafeteria food?"

"uhmmm yeah, i am. all i ate was cafeteria food when i was a trainee. that and my mom prepared my lunch." his smug smile was visible, like he just won an argument.

"alright mister working class. just keep it quick, we don't want to be late for your meeting."

------------------------------

you never knew lunch with mark was enjoyable. there were rare occassions where you sat down and ate with him and the whole team but that was just after concerts, usually as a thank you to the whole production team. it was like talking to a friend, the whole mood was light and enjoyable. lame jokes and stories were exchanged, he was completely relatable. before you know it, your smart watched pinged again with a reminder to get mark in the conference room soon. you frowned a bit knowing that you could never get moments like this with him. like he's not some big kpop idol with dragging schedules.

"alright champ, let's get you in that conference room in 5 minutes. i'll be back with your coffee after that."

that was your nickname for him. champ. when you're not calling him by his name, you'd usally refer to him as the silly nickname you gave him. just because he's being a complete champion in your eyes for braving his demanding schedule and after achieving so much in such a young age. "it's obviously an appropriate nickname" you thought to yourself and besides he doesn't mind. if anything, it gives him the boost of confidence to take on his tasks.

"it's the 10th floor, conference room 1003 just a few doors away from the elevator on the right. i'll go get your coffee. hurry there now." you pressed the elevator and it immediately opened right infront of you and mark. he walked inside the elevator and pouted when he saw you on the other side, "you'll be there right? i kinda need you there." you can feel the butterflies in your stomach rioting. how could he say that when he looks to you with pleading eyes like he wanted to grab you to get inside the elevator. "i'll be there, promise" you manage to beam out a smile at him as the elevator door close between you and mark.

you didn't know if you were just delusional or was mark hinting something more than what he meant? of course he needed you there, after all you are his assistant. why else would he want you to be there? sure, you had your silly little crush for mark, he is the mark lee after all. but after working in such close proximity with him, you learned more and more about him. how you admired his work ethic, how dedicated he is to his passion, how he remained humble and level headed despite his fame and success, he barely complained about his schedule, he even talked you out of mentioning it to the top brass in the company in fears that you might get in trouble because of him - so thoughtful. You remembered the time where he sent you flowers and a new bag for your birthday - you never really asked for it, you barely had plans for your birthday and you just casually mentioned it one time when he asked, but you never really thought anything of it. so he's also generous and attentive.

"y/n, happy birthday. i hope you like it. thanks for everything. what would i do without you? :) always, mark."

that was written on the card attached to the birthday flowers he sent you. you melted right then and there. if he wasn't who he is, you'd definitely act upon these signals. but you had to brush it aside, he probably does this for every employee he wants to thank. you'd know because you're usually the one arranging the flowers and gifts on his behalf. keeping things professional, you obviously had to shove your feelings away. this is just mark being mark. he's an amazing guy, of course he'll do these amazing things just because. it's not like he'll reciprocate your feelings, you're a co-worker for god's sake, a personal assistant at that.

before you know it, you're standing infront of room 1003, mark's iced coffee in one hand and your clip board in the other. You gently pushed the door and made a beeline towards him and handed the beverage, careful not to interrupt the speaker while he explains the motif of the festival. you sat on the sidelines as you try to keep up with the meeting, making sure you catch the missed details while you were out on your coffee run. mark looked from his shoulders at you and saw you hunching over your laptop, brows knitted together while you take notes. a small smile forming on his lips as he noticed how cute you looked when you're focused, how your lips mouth the last sentence the speaker as you type down the words. clearly, his thoughts were not in the meeting. his head keeps on replaying the gestures you’d done over the years. he’s been always an observant, a silent one at least. he’d notice the way you fidget with your fingers whenever you’re nervous, like when the first time the two of you were formally introduced, you were shy and hid behind his manager for most of the time during your early days but then eventually eased up as the days go by. he remembered the day you walked up to the management office and demanded that they give him a more lenient schedule only for you to be scolded back by your seniors - where he saw you tear up and choke a sob, immediately apologizing to him and he swore he could have hugged you right then and there. Another moment where he saw you cry was right before he went on stage for his first solo album debut showcase - you were crying on the wings of the theater while he performs, obviously proud on how far he’d become. he glanced at you a bit and his expression softened for a short while, but you just assured him with two thumbs up and a smile. he had to come to terms with the fact that he did care for you more than a co-worker. he always looked forward for the cute reminders and the silly sticky notes you'd leave on top of his laptop, he kept those by the way. his day immediately brightens up once he knows that you will be tagging along his engagements, even 12 hour flights don’t seem too bad if he knows that you’ll be there. like he was looking for you wherever you go. when you cannot tag along for his engagements in australia, that really bummed him because you were so excited on his behalf and also the fact that you wanted to see a koala in real life - so when he came back, mark got you a souvenir plush keychain of a koala, which is now hanging on your bag at all times. he was never this invested in his previous assistants - but then again, he feels like you’re more than that.

”and that’s it. anymore questions? if not, i’ll send the important details to your managers. let’s close the meeting.” the speaker immediately left the conference room for yet another meeting. you said your hellos and made a quick bow to everyone, even the other dreamies were apologetic for hurrying out for their other engagements, you and mark were almost alone in the conference room, other employees minding their own business or hurrying off to another part of the building.

”oh hey, so you have another thing in like 15 minutes.” you hurriedly looked at your smartwatch to get a glimpse of mark’s demanding schedule. “15 minutes to spare, do you want me to get you some snacks or tea?” you looked at him and he just stared back at you like you were some puzzle he wants to solve. “mark?” he blinked, a couple of times before realizing that he did stare quite longer than expected. “oh no, uhmm tha-that’s okay. i’ll just catch up with the other guys. i’ll meet you on the practice room, yeah?” it was his turn to get all nervous and flustered. he haphazardly gathered his things and went straight out of the conference room and you just stood there utterly confused on what just happened.

------------------------------

you had texted mark to head on down the practice room now that you returned to your desk in the office. you could hang out in the practice rooms but with things being weird with mark, you thought that maybe a little distance will calm your senses down. not long after you sent out your text, mark replied

“are you not going to watch me practice” -mk

and you can’t deny it, your heart swelled. did he really wanted you there? where he can dance and suave his way into your heart further? it was honestly tempting but you had to stand on your ground. besides, these practices tend to run a lot longer than their intended time, you liked mark, but you also had a long day.

“ohh tempting, but i am really swamped with work, i need to get this done soon. next time tho 😉” -yn

a winky face? now you are treading dangerous waters. flirty banter with mark is probably one of your favorite things, you’ve always known that it was just nothing but pure silliness, but somehow, today feels different. no point deleting this message now, like you threw out a grenade and prayed that it doesn’t blow up in your face.

“i’d be more energized if i see you watching me. c’mon now it’s almost 6, just drop by?” -mk

“fine, i’ll just finish up this last email.” -yn

“alright then, see ya 😚” -mk

a kissy face? oh now it’s going to be really awkward or maybe it’s just the two of you being playful. no harm, no foul. just keeping things light and easy. your heart raced as you quickly pack your bags, do you really want to see him during practice after the series of texts you just exchanged? but you have to keep your word, you’ll be there, 5 minutes and then it’s time to go. you opened the practice room doors and you so mark dancing to one of his songs. he was glistening, his shirt clung to his body as he moved, his hair tousled with sweat - even in this situation he looked so god damned good. he saw you standing by the door and he gave you a quick smile and a wink and went back to serious mode as he faced the floor length mirror. You could hyperventilate then and there, but all you did was shift your legs and steady yourself, you obviously caught him wink at you, it wasn’t some sort of optical illusion. finally, the music stoped and the choreographer cued everyone to take five. Mark skipped towards your direction and you handed him a towel to wipe himself off, he was smiling from ear to ear.

“well you were amazing, no doubt about that.” you clapped your hands and smiled at mark. “just don’t forget to shower before you meet with your family, okay? that’s 7pm.” you went back to assistant mode, reminding him of his personal engagement.

“yeah, about that. i think i’m gonna bail on practice for today”

“WHAT?”

Before you know it, Mark walked over to the choreographer and whispered something in his ear, he immediately bolted towards you and grabbed your hand to the exit before you can say anything. The two of you immediately reached the elevator and he impatiently pressed the button. trying your best to catch your breath, you looked at mark like he was crazy, maybe he is, because he’s just smiling at you as he catches his breath.

“What the— what the hell, mark?” you said in between breaths, hands, grabbing your knees in exhaustion. “What’s going on?” Before you know it, mark dragged you inside the elevator and looked at you with the same smile and twinkle in his eyes. He’s not saying anything, just jagged breaths from the sprinting that you just did. When the elevator doors open, you realized that you’re in the basement parking lot, completely confused you hesitantly backed away from him, mark just gestured for you to follow him.

“mark, what’s going on?” you asked, with worry in your voice, your fingers fidgeting while you speak. mark saw this and immediately grabbed your hands and linked with his. your face still spells confusion but you immediately relaxed once he held your hands, pulling you closer to him and almost closing the distance between you.

“i’m tired of running away, y/n” his features soften as he scans your face “i feel like i can’t keep it in me anymore. i need to tell you or else i’m going to explode” his voice, softer that ever, like he was whispering a prayer.

“mark— i—“ the words just can’t get out of your system, like your body was going haywire all at once. you’re way too close to mark that you can smell him, his musk and cologne mixing just right to make you melt right then and there. his face way too close to yours and you paused on his lips before going straight back to his eyes.

“i like you.” he said it out low and sincere, that you barely heard it right when he said it. “i can’t get you out of my mind, y/n. every dream, every waking moment, you were there and i know it’s a longs hot and probably a complicated set of events but i just can’t get you out of my system.” mark’s confession shocked you, like you were hearing him talk in a foreign language.

“i like you too. i can’t help to feel butterflies whenever we’re alone, how my heart aches whenever i see you tired and stressed, how my heart flutters whenever i see you perform on stage.” you scrambled your brain for all the things you want to say to mark “how i felt seen and understood whenever we talk, how easy it is to confide to you whenever. mark, i think it’s safe to say that i love you.” the last part was almost a wisp. mark smiled and grabbed your face gently as he closes the gap between you with a soft lingering kiss. your foreheads touched as the two of you giggled at the sudden confession also after realizing where you were, this is probably the only place the two of you could get some privacy in the whole building.

“so you love me, huh?” mark teased as he walked over to his car, opening the passenger door so you can get in.

“shut up!!! but i do.” you can feel the adrenaline fading back as it is being replaced by embarrassment.

“i love you too so it’s a tie” mark leaned over to steal another kiss from you and he chuckled as he saw your blushing face. you buried your face in your hands as mark drives his car out of the basement parking lot. you heard a ping from your smartwatch which made you look up from your initial position

“mark! the family dinner at 7, you’ll be late.” you reminded him with worry in your eyes.

“don’t worry, babe, we’ll make it in time.” your eyes widened upon hearing what he just said, he just smiled and kissed your cheeks as he continued to drive away.

[mooncalf87]

Mastermind live watch ayy

Spoils under cut obv

Andr always calling Stella hot is so weird and off putting. Is that actually your sister or what. What is this.

ALL THE SINS IN ONE ROOM. IM LOSING MY SHIT. is that a note in lucis throne

OZZIE LOOKING AT ANDR WHEN HE CALLS STELLA HOT

VASAGGO I LOVE YOU ALREADY. im positive I spelt his name wrong but its okay

SPANISH BIRDIE YIPPIE

you can see Lucis throne behind Andr in this scene oh my god. It's just a note that says "brb" with a duck of himself and a bunch of spiderwebs I CANT

VASAGOS FULL OUTFIT. diva sighting I fear.

What does Vas watch over for thr family he. He is zesty and has a sexy voice and has a star magic platform. Yeah alright ru paul magic man

THEY DID NOT. BLITZ DID NOTHING

THE SCAR. HE GOT A SCAR. STRIKER GOT A SCAR. IM LOSING IT

Yeah okay fkr I swear. HAND NOTES WHAT.

Blitz ur digging your own gave here baby girl. Stfu

MOXXIE AKJAGSJAGJD

blitz shut up

YES BEE MY QUEEN. YES OZZIE YES DEFEND YOUR COUSINS WEIRD SEX DEAL MAN I love them so much

UGH MAMMON

Ozz and Bee raising their hands without a millisecond of thought. They barley even know blitz but they are standing their gound for him. Hey what if I just (bursts into flames)

Oh Vas is not gotta stand for this is he

Okay what is this weird thing between Levi and Mam. Are they not all siblings like I have been assuming for (checks watch) years

VEROSIKA AND FIZZ OUGH

Ough ought no my babys

This adorable "try some meditation 😩✋" guy. I love him

SATAN CREATED IMPS CANNON LETS FUCKING GOOOOOOOO

OH A HELLA NOVELA. THATS STOLASS TV ISNT IT. OH NO

USING LUCIS NAME YES THANK YOU ITS CANNON YES. I'm only 10 minutes in this post is gonna be really long isn't it

Oh stolas you better show up full demon form in thr most dramatic way. Please.

BLITZ JUST. ACCEPTING IT???? stolas pls bbg get your ass in here

YES. YES. YES. YES.

They way I am not okay and have to stop making this post. I will update this later I promise oh man

-

Alright. Okay. Alright.

Someone kill me.

SOOOOO stolas got stripped of his power for 100 years which means his immortality was also taken and his hair has already visibly gone a strip of gray so he will most likely die at the same time as blitz if they go of old age just gotta get that one out of the way

THEY STRIPPED HIM OF HIS POWER. HIS EYES DONT GLOW, HE HAS PUPILS. SOME OF HIS HAIR WENT WHITE. I'm so happy I can't even express this. I'm sad he isn't a powerful prince anymore but OH MAN.

OH. MAN.

them giving him white hair makes up for everything.

I need someone to talk to about this ep before I explode you guys don't understand im dming all my friends

[scotianostra]

Happy Birthday one of Scotland’s most gifted singers Ann “Annie” Lennox, born December 25th 1954.

Born in Summerfield Maternity hospital, Aberdeen, the daughter of Dorothy (née Ferguson) and Thomas Allison Lennox Annie showed talent from an early aged, she won a scholarship at the age of 17 for The Royal Academy of Music in London.

From a fortuitous chance encounter with Dave Stewart in the early seventies, the pair went on to form The Tourists, who ultimately achieved significant success in the UK, Europe and Australia.

It was not until the break up of the band in ’79 however, that Annie and Dave decided to form a duo, calling themselves “Eurythmics”.

They released their first album, “In the Garden” in 1981, but it was not until the worldwide success of their second album, (Sweet Dreams Are Made Of This) in 1983, that Eurythmics became the musical phenomenon we know today.

Eurythmics went on to sell over 75 million albums, and achieved over 20 international hits across the world.

In 1990, Annie released her debut solo album entitled “Diva”. Entering the charts at number 1 in the UK, the album sold around six million copies world wide, (including two and a half million in the USA). Diva included the Top 10 singles Why, Walking On Broken Glass and Little Bird

In 1995, her second album was released, entitled “Medusa”. An album of lovingly crafted reinterpretations of some of Lennox’s favourite songs. It also debuted at number one, and included the massive single No More I Love You’s, Medusa sold around 5 million copies.

Annie is an Ambassador for UNAIDS, Oxfam, Nelson Mandela’s 46664 Campaign, Amnesty International, The British Red Cross, London as well as supporting numerous other organisations.

In September 2008 Annie Lennox hosted the launch of the Amnesty Arts Fund. The Amnesty Arts Fund brings together people who believe passionately in freedom of expression and projects that inspire creative activism around the world. She has won many awards, for her music and for the work she does does for good causes and charity.

Annie Lennox and Dave Stewart performed as Eurythmics at the Microsoft Theater in Los Angeles, California performing "Would I Lie to You?", "Missionary Man" and "Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This)" as part of the 2022 Rock and Roll Hall of Fame induction ceremony. They were inducted by U2's the Edge.

Fans of the Annie will be glad to know that she will be playing a gig in London. Entitled Sisters: Annie Lennox And Friends, the one-off concert will support The Circle, raising funds to help women and girls facing violence and injustice worldwide.

There had been news of a Eurythmics reunion and 40th anniversary tour, but it has failed to materialise. Dave Stewart continues to tour as Dave Stewart Eurythmics.

[365sylviaplath]

Week of 7/21 - 7/27

astrology forecast + collective tarot card for the week

Card for this week: Knight of Wands - we’re inspired, motivated, ready for adventure this week! perfect for leo season! it’s time to take action on something bold, brave, new, ambitious. wildest dreams. bigger than your wildest dreams! nothing too grand.

Transits/Astro forecast: very sun focused week! you’re the star!! even with the recent chaos and the influx of retrogrades, you’re finding moments to shine. sometimes the celebration is most necessary when you haven’t been feeling particularly celebratory! we’re feeling brand new, reborn, ready for a new era of self. happy leo season, divas. it’s all about us. current retrogrades: mercury, saturn, neptune and pluto.

tuesday 7/22 - sun enters leo, sun sextile uranus, mars conjunct south node - welcome leo season! combining the celebration of self today with an embrace of the new and unusual. you’re finding it quite natural to step outside of the status quo and test out new, eccentric ways of seeing yourself. mars conjunct the south node (first time since 10/5/23) presents us with a potent outlet for releasing old baggage/habits we can no longer take with us. being authentically yourself will challenge you to let go of the burdens you’ve been carrying for others (sometimes without even realizing!).

wednesday 7/23 - venus square mars (and venus squaring the north/south node) - some overlap from yesterday with mars conjunct south node (keeping us focused on releasing old baggage), but venus squaring that conjunction is bringing up conflicts and tensions in relationships and self expression. there may be some lingering conflict around “what feels good” and what actually serves you on your path, or you may find yourself torn between keeping the peace and speaking your mind. lean into understanding your needs and where they come from/how they formed and try not to judge yourself for them! 

thursday 7/24 - new moon in leo, sun trine saturn rx, sun trine neptune rx, sun opposite pluto  - lots going on today!! the sun extremely present in all transits - calling us to recommit to ourselves in various ways. are we upholding our boundaries? are we seeing ourselves clearly while still permitting ourselves to dream big? challenging ourselves to share who we are with the world? sun was last opposite pluto on 7/23/24, so you might be circling back to events from that timeframe. you seek self-expression, but you might feel self-conscious or like you’re not ready to be seen yet for who you are. see what happens when you step into the spotlight today!

potential journal prompts:

~bringing back and remixing some from the full moon in leo back in february~

is shame holding you back from truly expressing love as you'd like to? How would you express love if it was entirely up to you? 

has anyone made you feel guilty about pursuing what you would love, to the point where you stopped pursuing it?

if you had no fear of being seen as conceited or vain, how might you actually view yourself? What would self love look like if no one were around to witness you?

what qualities or characteristics do you value in a partner? are these qualities/characteristics you also need to recognize in yourself? 

which boundaries could you maintain that would help you feel like you could fully show up as yourself?

[vocaloid-preservation]

🧿SONG APPRECIATION🧿

“Psi” “プシ” “Pushi”

r-906 ft Hatsune Miku

This is an official upload!

-more under the cut-

Original upload date: December 22, 2022

Original video description:

"Tsumiki's "Culture" sang more than enough about the future of 39ch, so as second up I wrote with the intent to "shock" with the song itself... Saying that is just me showing off, but essentially this is my usual fare. I have dug deep into what makes me and my Hatsune Miku's expressions unique, and with the power of the wonderful illustration and video, I believe this has become a piece like none other on the Hatsune Miku Official YouTube Channel so far. I won't say anything specific about the song here. I freely did my own thing, so I hope everyone sees, listens, and feels freely. Just one thing though: don't touch Miku's right hand." -r-906

Interesting info: this song was written for the official Hatsune Miku YouTube channels revival. An effort to get that channel moving again after the western audience grew. It has now also been performed live with its own model at the Hatsune Miku: BLOOMING show.

Which is really interesting, as not many songs get custom models unless they are a flagship song for the show or have a project diva model to reuse. Not even Mesmerizer got this treatment. The likely reason is because Psi is already a commissioned song, so they can do what they want with it.

Also a cool detail I want to mention about the live is that the eyes on her dress begin to glow after “You have just touched my right hand!”

The original PV, drawn by Hakyu and edited by Aise Manami, has many neat details. The stillness of the video coincides with the theming of the song. “Mass media consumption”. The PV starts off with a still image of Miku, smugly smiling at the listener. It stays this way until the second verse, with only occasional facial changes. The long instrumental intro pushing a brain rotted listener to want to “skip ahead to the best part”… But Miku is there reminding you to “don’t touch my right hand.”… Aka, skipping ahead 10 seconds.

My thoughts: I LOVE VOCALOID MUSIC ABOUT MEDIA CONSUMPTION!! Everyone’s been hitting so good lately. Psi specifically works really well in that it is NOT trying to hide it behind flashy colors like say.. Mesmerizer… it’s DIRECT. And the PV forces you to at least pay attention to the first verse and chorus because there’s nothing else going on, unlike Mesmerizer where everyone missed the dang point cus they were entranced by the PV. R-906 knocked it out of the park with this.

Don’t touch Miku’s right hand.

[rockermybuddie]

Protecting whats mine

Tw: mentions alcohol

Tommy x Evan “Buck”

Summary: Tommy and Buck are going to a bar with the 118. When Buck leave to grab more drinks for the table the bartender is getting a little too flirty with him. Tommy notices and gets a little protective over Buck.

A/n: Im going to write this in third person because it would switch too much between Buck and Tommy. So forgive me if i forget and use first person.

•Also if someone could tell me how to do the word count thing i see on other stories ? It might be a different app but i just write on tumblr lol, is that weird?

————

Tommy say on the couch waiting for his little diva to get ready. “Come on Evan, we are going to be late.” He says leaning back on the couch cushion, hes been ready for 20 minutes while Evans been doing his hair for 30. Hes not even dressed yet and they are supposed to leave in 5 minutes.

“Which top will look better with my pants?” Evan asks holding up a navy blue button up and a dark green t-shirt. Tommy looks over at his shirtless boyfriend and just admires him before answering.

“Either one will look fine Evan, you are wearing black jeans.” Tommy answers. “Thats not the point. Will the navy look too dark with my pants? I’m just going to wear the green.” Evan huffs going back into the bedroom. “Then why did you ask me?!” Tommy lets out a soft laugh at his adorable love leaning back against the couch.

Finally after another 10 minutes Evan is finally ready to go, he ended up wearing a white t-shirt and a blue-plaid flannel.

——-

When Tommy and Evan enter the bar they look for where the rest of the 118 were. They spotted them in the back corner.

“Hey guys whats up?!” Evan says waving at everyone with a big smile. “You all are late.” Hen says looking at the time. “You can blame the diva here, he couldn’t decide on what to wear.” Tommy says watching Evans cheeks turn red.

Everyone sat around and talked about the most recent calls or what their kids are into now. Everyone is just tipsy, not drunk enough for karaoke yet.

“Buck how about you go get us more drinks.” Chimney says. “Meeee?!” He exclaims. “Yeah since you were late.” Chimney reminds. Buck scrunched his nose and pushed up off the table to get more drinks.

“Are you a firefighter?” The young bartender asks. “Yeah i am.” Evan says, Evan notices her looking at his muscles as he leans on the counter with his arms crossed. But he doesn’t think much about it. “Can you pick up people?” She asks with a bright smile. Evan furrows his brows together saying a shaky yes. He just wants the drinks so he can go back to the table.

“Need help with the drinks babe?” A deep voice asks, Evan feels a familiar arm wrap around his waist. Evan looks to his right and sees Tommy now standing next to him, he smiles. They both notice the bright friendly expression on the young bartenders face was now filled with shock and maybe a little embarrassment.

She quickly got their drinks to them and walked away fast to another guy at the end of the bar.

“That was pretty hot.” Evan says as they walk back to the table. “She was giving you too much googly eyes. I didnt like it.” Tommy says shivering his shoulders. “Well you announced yourself pretty loud i think the whole bar knows now.” Evan jokes.

“Good. They know whats mine now.” Tommy tells him. That made Evans stomach get butterflies and now all he wants to do is go home and have sex with him.

——

A/n: I hope you liked it lol. I know its really short but i personally like writing just short and simple stories. And honestly my brain can only handle short and simple, i get too side tracked and off topic when its gets too long.

[joesalw]

You really can't write this shit lmao...

TS's friend group consists of Miss 'idc about genocide and continue to employ a bloodthirsty zionist CEO for my makeup brand' and Cara D who's great grandfather created the Black and Tans which is a terrorist organisation that killed Irish people during the Irish War of Independence. A group that also sent their people to kill Palestinians in favor of establishing the state of Israel. Last night these 3 went to Ramy Youssef's (who Taylor probably met at the "Poor Things" premiere) comedy show in NYC and 100% of the proceeds would go to the Gaza relief fund. The thing is, Selena and Taylor are getting all the credit and praise for Ramy's activism. I've been a fan of her work for the past 10 years and her recent activities have turned me off of her completely. The turning point was that pathetic TIME interview.

I've always thought of her as this well-read individual who can masterfully express herself whether it would be public speaking or writing but I couldn't help but cringe while reading that article. She tries too hard to appeal to gen z and younger millennial crowd when she herself is practically pushing 40 atp. I feel like all of her 'intelligence' came from being around Joe Alwyn who's a notorious bookworm. The fact that she describes her Rep era as 'goth-punk' was the first strike, the 2016 hate train as a ' career death' was the 2nd and the whole patriarchy delusion she went into just hit the final nail in the coffin and I was like 'nope, not doing this shit anymore'.

I know that swifties have been comparing her to Beyonce lately saying things like 'well, Taylor writes her songs' or 'Beyonce can't read' and talking about how she doesn't give interviews so people don't know that she's dumb. And as a comparison I've found her Harper's Bazaar interview that she gave when she turned 40. And good God, I've slept on this woman for way too long. In the interview she talks about building her work ethic from an early age. The dedication of her life's decades (First decade was dedicated to dreaming, the teens were about the grind, the 20s were about building a strong foundation for her career and establishing her legacy, the 30s were about starting her family and prioritizing her own life over her career). She started her own management company at 27, in 2013 she started her charity foundation in which she helps hurricane relief, education, supporting minorities businesses, families with housing needs, water crises, pediatric health care and pandemic relief. She talks about expanding her business ventures beyond music industry, talks about setting boundaries in the world of celebrity culture, about her friends being a group of strong independent women, about the importance of mental health. She also says that she's most inspired by her parents ("My mother has always been my Queen and still is. She has always been so strong and is filled with humanity", "No matter how tired she was, she was always professional, loving, and nurturing."; "My father constantly encouraged me to write my own songs and create my own vision. He is the reason I wrote and produced at such a young age."). That woman is so well-spoken and genuine you can't help but feel warm while reading it and she doesn't feel the need of throwing unnecessary 'smart people' words to seem that way.

Reading Taylor's "Person of the Year" profile and Beyonce's 'Entering 40s' interview were completely different experiences. And as a result, one of them lost a fan and the other gained one. I wish Tree Paine would stop Taylor from giving these interviews because everytime she does, she comes across as tone-deaf, out of touch, mentally stuck overgrown teenager, try-hard bratty diva who can't stand being not the only one praised.

Anyway, I'd recommend to read the full interview and watching her new film. I've watched it yesterday and got the urge of turning my life around. That lady is truly such a light.

Taylor's friend list also includes 'Mr. and Mrs. plantation with slave cabins on the property wedding', 'a sex offender and a SA apologist as the newest addition', 'Ms. "I assaulted my own sister", ' an insecure and whiny music producer who likes to stir drama on Taylor's behalf'. And not to mention that she's dated a nazi this year and her newest flavour of the month is a fatphobic jock with a double digit iq, her father is also an avid republican voter. I think the people she surrounds herself with tell about her more than she does herself.

And concluding with two cents about Joe Alwyn. I'm glad she's out of his life. While I was a swiftie I've watched his interviews and he always came across as a very gentle, calm, well-spoken and a bit introverted man. And she's... well, her. I also think that she'd held him back in her job in regards of producers and directors not wanting their work to be overshadowed by 'Taylor's BF is in this' articles. I'm hoping he does more projects in the future or maybe dips his toes in writing and directing something because clearly he's a talented writer.

Sorry for the long rant, had to get it out of my system <3

I love reading your rants, keep it coming. they are so on point.

[sammysstolenbirks]

silver storm

chapter II

I'm really enjoying writing this so far so i might just speed run it atp 💀 also there might be some typos, I've been righting bits and peices at like 3am but I'm trying

WARNINGS

angst, swearing, mention and uses of drugs and alcohol, mentions of mental health issues, death, smut (eventually)

JOSH POV

i wake up to the sound of my alarm blasting in my ear. i quickly shut the annoying sound off and check the time. 6:30. perfect. i get up and stretch before heading to the bathroom. unsurprisingly sam is already in there, no doubt styling his hair. and they call me a diva. i bang on the door "Cmon sam other people live here too"

Sam yells through the door "i got here first, you can't wait 10 minutes?"

"We both know your gonna spend an hour in there. Hurry your ass up."

I hear Sam yell something else but its too late for me to hear as i walk back to my room to check my phone. I smile as I see a text from y/n.

𝐲/𝐧 ☀

𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐬𝐨𝐫𝐫𝐲 𝐢 𝐝𝐢𝐝𝐧'𝐭 𝐭𝐞𝐱𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐢 𝐟𝐞𝐥𝐥 𝐚𝐬𝐥𝐞𝐞𝐩 𝐚𝐬 𝐬𝐨𝐨𝐧 𝐚𝐬 𝐢 𝐡𝐢𝐭 𝐦𝐲 𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐥𝐨𝐥. 𝐖𝐚𝐧𝐧𝐚 𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐜𝐨𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐬𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐥?

𝐉𝐨𝐬𝐡

𝐇𝐞𝐲 𝐧𝐨 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬. 𝐀𝐧𝐝 𝐲𝐞𝐚𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐬𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐠𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭. 𝐍𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐡 𝐏𝐞𝐫𝐤?

𝐲/𝐧 ☀

𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐟𝐞𝐜𝐭 :)

i smile at my phone before hearing Sam finally getting out of the bathroom. I run to it before he has a chance to change his mind and take another 40 minutes. I finish up my morning routine which consists of showering, personal hygiene things, getting dressed and grabbing all of my stuff before walking downstairs. Im just about ready to leave when I hear Sam behind me.

"Hey Josh? Can I catch a ride to school? Jake took my car to see valerie again and he's not back yet, surprise surprise.

I consider telling him no, as I'm sure he doesn't want to see y/n this early, but that thought is quickly replaced with the possibility of them getting along.

"Yeah sure Sam let's go"

Y/n would never come if she knew Sam was invited, and Sam would try to find another ride if he knew where I was going. So I decided not to tell either of them. Maybe they could put their differences aside for one morning, and maybe that could turn into a couple mornings, and before I know it I'll be an uncle. Okay maybe I'm getting ahead of myself, but it would be nice for them to be friends at least.

Sam and I get into the car and drive. I see his confusion through my peripheral vision as were not driving on the road we normally go to school on.

"Uh Josh? Where are we going?"

"Oh did I not tell you? Were getting coffee this morning... With y/n." I try to fight off the grin creeping onto my face, but just let it take over. Sam looks at me like I just shit in his Cheerios. He scoffs writhes in his seat like a toddler. Typical sammy

"Are you kidding Josh? Yeah I think you forgot to mention that. Asshole."

I chuckle "youll thank me one day"

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean"

I simply shrug my shoulders and smile. as we pull into the parking lot I see y/n through the window of the tiny shop on her phone. i smile at the sight, while I'm sure Sam had a completely opposite expression. I park and have to bribe sam with a free coffee to get him to go inside with me. We make it inside and make our way to y/n, whos jaw clenches as she sees sam dragging his feet behind me. I say a silent prayer that this won't go nuclear, But knowing them, this will be world war three.

Y/N POV

As I see Josh come around the corner, i smile widely. but as he closes the gap between us, i see the raven haired boy strolling behind him. There goes my hope for a good morning. i get up to greet Josh, pulling him in a hug, also preparing to reprimand him for bringing Satan himself.

"Hey kid" Josh says, searching my face for a reaction.

"Hey" i lean up into his ear to whisper, "why is he here?"

"He needed a ride since jake still has his car, seeing you know who"

I nod and feel my eye twitch "can he stay in the car"

Josh chuckles "itll be fine y/n, who knows, maybe you'll enjoy it"

I roll my eyes and chuckle. We sit down and a waitress comes to take our order with a smile

"good morning guys, what can I get y'all?"

Josh answers first, reading the lady's name tag, "good morning to you too, 𝘚𝘢𝘣𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘢, Could I get a chai tea latte please?"

"Of course," she says smiling at him, clearly charmed by him already. Josh always had that affect on people. "And how about you guys?"

"Matcha latte" "Matcha latte, please" Sam and I say at nearly the same time. We look at each other, both of our muscles tensing, making a cloud of tension overcome the quiet little corner of the shop. we stay like this until he clears his throat, "actually just a coffee. Black" he says as he fixes his gaze onto his interlaced hands resting on the table. Sabrina nods, clearly confused. She smiles and says "yeah I'll be right back with those" Josh sends her an apologetic look which she smiles at and walks away to the counter.

Josh chooses to ignore what just happened, turning to me and starting up a conversation. Every so often I would catch myself looking at Sam from the corner of my eye, finding him in the same position as before. I think about why he decided to change his order. he was probably just being childish, not wanting to have anything in common with me. I laughed internally at it, but a part of me was slightly hurt, and I didn't understand why.

Sabrina eventually came by with our drinks, and from the corner of my eye, I swore I saw Josh pass her a napkin, but when I gave him a confused look, he only offered a shrug and a smile.

When it was time to go, we cleaned up the table the best we could and made our way to our cars.

"See you in a bit kid" Josh says as he smiles at me with a wave

"See you" you return his smile and we all drive to school.

The morning classes went pretty normally as most do, apart from the lingering thoughts of this morning swirling in your head. Why did it upset me? Sam is just an asshole, i should expect these types of things from him. Whatever.

Lunch finally rolls around as i sit at my table with my friends, well, acquaintances, making sure to keep an open seat for Josh like I promised. I finally see Josh roll in, about 10 minutes late (shocker) and he makes his way over to me. he reaches the table and smiles and sighs as he sits down.

"Who knew being an assistant could be so stressful?" He chuckles

"Well you know who our director is, shes crazy. shes going to drive you crazy too."

"Yeah.. I guess I shouldve known, Mrs. Vanderbilt is.... yeah"

"I bet you're doing great though. What are you doing for the play so far?"

"Well right now shes focused on making sure we have plans for the set, doesnt want to make the same mistake as last year"

Josh laughs as he refers to last year's play, where in the middle of the most heart wrenching scene, a wall fell down, making everyone break character and it was a mess.

I laugh and nod and I continue listening to him tall about his new duties. As he finishes up, he adds a comment that makes me jaw clench.

"So have you thought at all about your audition?"

"Not really.. Ive never really done plays before, well aside from little kid ones. But never ones like this. I don't even know what I should prepare, what I should wear.. " i feel my mind start to spiral, but Josh quickly puts a stop to it.

"Well consider yourself lucky, you have a man on the inside who knows exactly what she's looking for" Josh says as he smiles widely at me, "besides I can always bribe her too, she's weirdly obsessed with subway" Josh says with a wink.

I smile and try to listen to his advice. Maybe I really could get the lead. And maybe this would just be the beginning. The push I need to finally put myself out there. Maybe.

JOSH POV

After helping y/n with her audition, I finish up the rest of my assistant duties and head home for the day. I see jake sitting on the couch as I walk in the front door.

"Hey Jake, finally home I see"

He rolls his eyes at me and smiles "Valerie wanted to hang out longer, I couldn't say no"

I sigh and laugh "yeah I get that, but next time, get your car fixed and don't take Sam's. I had to take him to get coffee with me and y/n this morning."

"Oh man, how was that?"

"Wasnt as bad as I thought it was going to be actually. Who knows, maybe they'll finally get along soon"

"We can only hope" Jake says with a laugh. I nod and laugh as well before heading upstairs to my room

The rest of my afternoon is filled with editing some lyrics to show to the boys later. This song has been in the making for many, many years, y/n being the muse. I wrote this so when we eventually have to leave each other to go to college, or in my case travel the world, hopefully, she can always come back to it and it would remind her she's never alone, no matter how it may seem. This song also helps remind me that home is where ever the people you love are, and I hope she interperates it the same.

as I'm finishing up, I hear the front door open. 3:13.

I hear shuffling up the stairs and I open my door to investigate. I see sam basically dragging himself up the stairs. He notices my presence and looks up at me. On his face I see a purple tinted bruise protruding around his eye. He looks pissed.

"Hey what's up, you look like hell"

"Dont fucking talk to me right now."

I stop him with my arm before he has a chance to walk by me

"Hey, im here for you, you know that right? Talk to me. What's going on?"

He sighs, accepting defeat, "I got in a fight."

"Yeah I gathered that" I laugh "why? What happened?"

"Just some kid I had to put in his place"

"Okay, did they call mom"

"Yeah, she said they made an arrangement so I wouldnt get suspended or something like that. I dont know. She said she was gonna call me tonight and let me know what they thought"

"Okay, that's good. It doesn't sound like it'll be too bad" I sigh with relief and put my hand on his shoulder, "if I can help you out with it, I will okay?"

He looks at me and offers me a small smile, "Yeah, thanks josh"

"No worries, little brother" I say as I ruffle his hair. He laughs a little before pushing me away softly and going to his room and shutting the door.

I continue on with writing before I see the time and decide I should make some food.

I go down stairs and start on my signature dish, chicken alfredo. As im draining my noodles, I see my phone light up, its y/n

𝐲/𝐧 ☀

𝐡𝐞𝐲, 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐝 𝐦𝐞 𝐚 𝐦𝐨𝐧𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐞 𝐨𝐫 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐲 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐦𝐲 𝐚𝐮𝐝𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧?

𝐉𝐨𝐬𝐡

𝐘𝐞𝐚𝐡 𝐈 𝐠𝐨𝐭 𝐢𝐭.

I exit messages and google Romeo and Juliet. I scroll for a bit before finding the perfect one. Mrs. Vanderbilt's favourite scene.

𝐋𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐚𝐭 𝐚𝐜𝐭 𝟒 𝐬𝐜𝐞𝐧𝐞 𝟑. 𝐉𝐮𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐭'𝐬 𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐞𝐜𝐡 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐛𝐞 𝐠𝐨𝐨𝐝. 𝐌𝐫𝐬. 𝐕 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐬 𝐢𝐭 𝐭𝐨𝐨 😉

𝐲/𝐧 ☀

𝐨𝐤𝐚𝐲 𝐠𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐤𝐬 𝐣𝐨𝐬𝐡 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐮

𝐉𝐨𝐬𝐡

𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐭𝐨𝐨 𝐤𝐢𝐝

I smile as I shut my phone off and finish up my dinner. I yell at everyone in the house that its ready, and my twin and sister come barreling down the stairs.

Jake is the first to say anything "hey thanks, 𝘮𝘰𝘮"

"Yeah whatever asshole, you wouldn't be eating this good if I wasn't here so shut up and grab a plate" I laugh at Jake and see Ronnie comming up to me

"Thanks J, im starving"

"Yeah of course, wheres Sam?"

"He should be comming? Im sure he heard you, how could he not, you probably scared the whole neighborhood" she says as I lightly shove her head away on my way upstairs.

I reach Sam's door and lightly knock, "hey dude I made dinner, you hungry?"

"Hey no, but could you come in here for a minute"

I walk in to see Sam sitting at his desk with his head in his hands

"Hey what's up? Are you okay?"

He sighs before looking at me "mom called."

"Yeah? What, is it bad? Theyre not sending you to boarding school are they?" I laugh, trying to cheer him up

"No, worse."

"Tell me already Sam, what?"

"Theyre making me do the fucking play."

My jaw drops as I fight a smile from creeping onto my face

"Oh. Well, i mean that's definitely not the worse thing that could happen. Why are they having you do that though? That doesn't seem like a punishment"

"Well yeah to you it wouldn't."

"That's fair. What are they having you do? Stage crew or something?"

"No. I have to be fucking Romeo. This is all your fault. She said that no other guys fit the role and they thought since im your brother I 𝘮𝘶𝘴𝘵 be as 𝘢𝘮𝘢𝘻𝘪𝘯𝘨 as you. Do you have any idea how embarrassing this is? My friends will have a fucking field day with this."

"Sam it'll be okay, Ill help you out, im helping y/n too. Maybe you guys could work together?" I regret the words as soon as they come out of my mouth. That'll just make this worse right now. My thoughts are proven to be correct as he speaks again "just get out. I need to sleep or something"

"Okay, are you sure you dont want any good? Its alfredo."

"I said no, just get the fuck out dude okay?"

I sigh and nod as I walk out and shut the door behind me. I walk downstairs and give a look at Jake, who immediately understands to not say anything to me right now. He strikes up a conversation with Ronnie to get the attention off me as I take my plate and head up to my room. I eat and think about my interaction with Sam. This can't be that bad, hes just being dramatic. Who knows? He might end up enjoying it or getting something out of it. Same with y/n. I know they both can really benefit from this. I just have to show them.

My thoughts are interrupted by my phone lighting up, I smile as soon as I see the notification.

☕️

𝐇𝐢, 𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐣𝐨𝐬𝐡?

A WEEK LATER

AUDITION DAY

Y/N POV

Ive been dreading this all day. What if im not good enough? What if all this staying up late, memorizing a huge monologue was all for nothing? No. Josh said it would be fine. It'll all work out. I step into the auditorium, immediately searching for josh, who I see on stage giving pointers to some helpless freshman who looks absolutely petrified. That's gonna be what I look like up there. I make my way down to the seats, taking an aisle one about 5 rows away from the stage. There's a good amount of people in the room, some doing vocal warmups, some doing last minute read throughs just to make sure they have everything memorized. Every one except one person. a boy, slumped into his chair, hood up, sitting on his phone. I studied him for a minute, wondering who it was before my curiosity was satisfied. The boy sits up in his seat, looking around the room to see everyone who showed up, before his eyes stopped on me. I see Sam in an auditorium. No, that can't be right, I do a double take before realizing that it is, in fact, Sam.

He notices my double take before smugly smiling at me and returning to his phone. I roll my eyes and revert my focus back to Josh, he sees me and basically jumps off the stage and runs to me

"Hey kid, are you excited?" He says with the biggest smile

"Trying to be" I say, forcing a smile which he notices

"Hey, it'll be great. I know how much you practiced and Mrs. V would be an idiot to not cast you. Maybe don't tell her I said that.. I don't want to end up dead by tomorrow." He laughs and hugs me "I have to go but I'll see you up there! Remember, you can do anything you set your mind to" he says with a wink

I smile back and repeat his advice over and over in my head. I can do this. Josh will be here and even if I don't get cast, I can say I tried. More than I could've said 5 years ago.

As the time grows closer for my audition, I feel my hands get sweaty and my breathing increasing. Why is this so hard? It's just reciting a paragraph and moving my arms as I speak. It shouldn't be this nerve wracking. My mind continues to spin and I barely notice the presence stepping up behind me

"Y'know I can hear you breathing from across the room right?"

I turn around to see Sam, once again

"Well sorry if my breathing annoys you sam. Not my fault I need to to live."

He rolls his eyes "your just being dramatic about this. It'll be fine."

"Shut up I didn't ask you for advice. What are you even doing here"

He starts to speak before he is interrupted by my name being shouted across the room. I turn around to see Josh and Mrs V waving me over. It's time. I take a deep breath and wipe my hands on the front of my jeans before making my way onto the stage. I am immediately blinded by the big lights, making this experience feel more real and terrifying.

"Whenever youre ready y/n" Mrs V says with a smile. I look over to josh, sitting next to her, for one final boost of confidence. He smiles at me and blows me a kiss. I smile and take one more breath before starting

"God knows when we shall meet again. I have a faint cold fear thrills through my veins, That almost freezes up the heat of life.... "

I go through the motions of what I imagine Juliet to look like, giving looks of desperation, throwing my hands up in defeat, stumbling to my knees. I start to get a little emotional as I finish up my last line

"Romeo! I come! This do I drink to thee"

I bow my head, signifying her death, as I wait to be excused from the stage. Instead I am met with silence. I dare to look up and see Josh, his jaw slightly dropped, and Mrs. V with tears in her eyes.

"My stars, Y/n. Who is this new person? That was absolutely beautiful. Thank you so much dear." She says, smiling wide.

I blink in disbelief. I did it. And they seemed to like it. I sigh with content and make my way to the seats. I trip over my own feet coming down the stairs and try to protect my head from the impact of the floor. But to my surprise, it never comes. Instead, I am met with the feeling of something holding me up, maybe my guardian angel, probably Josh. I open my eyes to see Sam looking down at me, his face softened. I look back at him and blush a little bit before straightening myself back up and looking to the floor before my attention is drawn back to the front row, where Mrs V and Josh are sat. I hear her say "So you've met our Romeo I see". My head whips to Sam, who has a sour expression on his face, obviously not happy about it either. I chuckle involuntarily, and it only grows as he gives me a dirty look, rolling his eyes.

"Wow... Acting? I could never imagine you doing that"

"Yeah well I couldn't imagine me doing it either, but here we are. Actually, I could never imagine you doing this either. Thought for sure you'd choke up there and go running back into the arms of your precious little Josh. Oh well, it's not too late. Maybe it'll happen on opening night" he says with a fake smile, obviously trying to upset me. I glare at him, trying to speak, but nothing is comming out. "What's wrong? Nothing to say?"

I sigh with frustration and start, "listen, asshole. Unlike you, I actually tried to get a role instead of just sitting back and it falling into my lap."

"Yeah well this wasn't my first choice, believe me."

"Oh of course. Sam Kiszka always has more important things going on. Thank you so much for gracing us with your presence. Y'know I feel bad for whoever Juliet will be, they'll have to put up with you all the time"

He glares at me before leaning towards me, making me walk back and hit my back on the ledge of the stage, "Oh yeah? Luckily for both of us, you'll never be Juliet."

That stung a little. But it's Sam, he has no idea what he's talking about

"Fuck off"

I say as I storm past him, shedding off the burden of our conversation in my trail. I decide to just head home. I'll see Josh in the morning and we can talk about everything then

Right now I need a break.

SAM POV

I don't know why I'm forced to sit in this godforsaken auditorium watching all these girls audition for a part they're most likely never going to get, except for the 𝘭𝘶𝘤𝘬𝘺 girl who does. She'll get so excited over something so miniscule as a couple lines in a mediocre high school production of a Shakespeare play.

They're all so desperate.

I think back to my conversation, well, argument, with Y/n. I don't know how Josh ever got her to do this. Her audition wasn't even that good, yet Josh and Mrs V seemed to be eating it up. I mean, sure, she spoke clearly... and slowly... beautifully- I shake my head before my thoughts go too far. Its only beautiful because Shakespeare is beautiful, Not a compliment to y/n. She probably won't even get the part anyway, so this was just a waste of time for her. She's lucky not to be given a part. This is going to be torture.

Hours and hours of rehearsals, my friends inevitably calling me names in the hallway, trying to create chemistry with whoever my love interest is..

This is my own personal hell

And it could've all been so easily avoided.

That fight was ridiculous. Why did I care so much what he said? It's not like it's anything I haven't said before. My mind starts re-enacting the scene in my head,

"𝘺𝘦𝘢𝘩 𝘥𝘶𝘥𝘦, 𝘺/𝘯'𝘴 𝘴𝘶𝘤𝘩 𝘢𝘯 𝘢𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘸𝘩𝘰𝘳𝘦, 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘭𝘺 𝘴𝘪𝘵𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘦, 𝘲𝘶𝘪𝘦𝘵, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘵𝘶𝘤𝘬𝘦𝘥 𝘢𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘑𝘰𝘴𝘩 𝘬𝘪𝘥. 𝘞𝘦𝘪𝘳𝘥. 𝘋𝘰𝘦𝘴 𝘴𝘩𝘦 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘺 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘴 𝘰𝘳 𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨? 𝘗𝘢𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘵𝘪𝘤."

𝘔𝘺 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘥 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘱𝘴 𝘢𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘥 𝘢𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘥 𝘰𝘧 𝘺/𝘯'𝘴 𝘯𝘢𝘮𝘦. 𝘐 𝘴𝘦𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘬𝘪𝘥 𝘸𝘩𝘰 𝘪𝘴 𝘺𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘰 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘴, 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘢𝘨𝘳𝘦𝘦𝘪𝘯𝘨. 𝘐 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 𝘢 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘵 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘳𝘪𝘴𝘦 𝘪𝘯 𝘮𝘺 𝘤𝘩𝘦𝘴𝘵, 𝘮𝘺 𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘴 𝘤𝘭𝘶𝘵𝘤𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘰 𝘧𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘴, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘮𝘺 𝘣𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘪𝘯𝘤𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘦. 𝘉𝘦𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘐 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘪𝘵, 𝘐'𝘮 𝘸𝘢𝘭𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘰 𝘩𝘪𝘮 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘱𝘶𝘯𝘤𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘩𝘪𝘮 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘢𝘤𝘦, 𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘩𝘪𝘮 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘨𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘥. 𝘞𝘦 𝘨𝘰 𝘢𝘵 𝘪𝘵 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘢 𝘧𝘦𝘸 𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘶𝘵𝘦𝘴 𝘣𝘦𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘐'𝘮 𝘣𝘦𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘱𝘶𝘭𝘭𝘦𝘥 𝘢𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘣𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘤𝘪𝘱𝘢𝘭, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘤𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘵𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘩𝘦𝘳.

I bring my mind back to reality and shake my head. It's all 𝘩𝘦𝘳 fault. Why does she constantly plague me and my thoughts even though I resent her?

Still,

Why do I care about her?

Taglist! (Idk if I'm doing this right)

@fleetingjake

[suzannenighstands]

Hey divas! I'm a little nervous since this is the first time I'm posting one of my stories here (⁠｡⁠ŏ⁠﹏⁠ŏ⁠) I'd like to clarify that English is not my first language, so please excuse any spelling mistakes!

I would also like to clarify that this story is not intended to bother or upset real people, it is my way of showing admiration and expressing my creativity (⁠｡⁠•́⁠︿⁠•̀⁠｡⁠)

Please, be kind 🌸

Content: boys love (Halfdán x Marko, I know it sounds weird but hear me out!), Maybe too cheesy for some people(⁠ꏿ⁠﹏⁠ꏿ⁠;⁠)

Read the story Here: https://www.wattpad.com/story/394891684?utm_source=android&utm_medium=link&utm_content=share_writing&wp_page=create&wp_uname=Suzettenighstands

Or under the cut!

Marko opened his eyes, running his hands through his hair as he sighed. He looked at the clock, 2:46 AM, and went to bed at 10:00 PM.

It wasn't something he wasn't used to; since he was little, he had trouble falling asleep, but with the stress of everything that was happening in his life lately, it had gotten worse.

He stood up, heading to the bathroom to wash his face and look at himself in the mirror. Large dark circles under his eyes, he couldn't help but sigh at how pathetic he looked.

He headed to the kitchen, trying to be as quiet as possible as he started heating the water. A cup of tea always helps people sleep, or at least that's what he'd heard and seen on the TV series.

A few minutes later he was already drinking the infusion while quietly playing with his kitten; at least he wasn't the only one awake.

Once he finished the infusion, he returned to his room, lying down with his cat by his side.

He closed his eyes; maybe this time he'd get a good night's sleep.

•••

—Marko!— The brown-haired boy almost jumped from the fright the other boy gave him.

A few moments later, he felt someone hug him from behind and place kisses on his cheek. Marko smiled shyly as he felt his cheeks heat up.

—Good morning, Hálfdán.— Marko said lazily as he hugged the blue-eyed boy.

—Ow, did you sleep badly again?— He asked while putting his arm around the brunette's waist.

Marko just let out a small groan in confirmation. Hálfdán offered to go to his house several times to sleep with him or at least keep him company while he's awake, but Marko knew perfectly well how important sleeping is for his boyfriend.

—Baby.— The blond stood in front of the other boy while gently grabbing his face. —Come sleep with me, maybe I'll help you.— Hálfdán smiled at him while gently stroking his boyfriend's hair.

—I'm just going to bother you.— Marko said with a slight frown.— I know that without sleeping your 8 hours you won't survive.— He said while letting out a small laugh remembering how Hálfdán spent an entire day angry when they went camping because He couldn't get enough sleep.

— I'll survive if I'm with you.— Marko looked at him as he felt his face turn completely red.—Look at that rizz, babyboy.— Both boys laughed as they started walking again.—But I'm serious.— He said as He wrapped his arms around the brunette's waist again. —Matthías will be at his girlfriend's house, and my parents don't mind. In fact, they want you to go! They really like you!—

Marko let out a groan as he thought about his answer. He let out a sigh and smiled down at his boyfriend, giving him a kiss on the lips.

—Fine.— The brown-haired boy said while smiling. — But I don't want you to stay up all night just for me.—

—Okey, pookie.— The blond said smiling.

Marko laugh at the nickname and put his arm around Hálfdán shoulders.

•••

Marko had just finished his skincare routine while Hálfdán was already in bed getting everything ready. The blond had asked his parents to make dinner for him and Marko earlier than usual so that the brown-haired boy would have more time to go to sleep at a decent hour.

—I'm ready.— Marko said as he sat down on the bed. —Are your sheets  Minecraft theme?— He asked, raising his eyebrow.

Hálfdán let out a proud laugh as he hugged Marko once they were both in bed.

—I put them just for you.— The blue eye left a kiss on the other boy's lips.—I'm rizzing you.— Marko smiled and rested his head on his boyfriend's chest.

—I doubt that word exists.— He smiled when he felt the blond begin to gently stroke his hair. —You really didn't have to do this, I don't want to upset you.—

Hálfdán let out a dramatic gasp as he brought his hand to his chest. Marko looked at him slightly scared and confused.

—How dare you say you're annoying?!— The blond said while leaving kisses all over the other boy's face.—You never bother, if I do this it's because I want you to sleep well.— Hálfdán left another kiss on Marko's lips.—+10000 aura points as a boyfriend.—

Marko laughed and walked over to kiss the other boy on the cheek. He smiled in thanks and placed his head back on the blond's chest.

— Good night.—

—Good night.— Hálfdán smiled.— Sleep well.—

°°°

Marko was still awake, and it was already 11:50 p.m. He couldn't tell if Hálfdán was also sleeping or just had his eyes closed.

The brunette let out a sigh as he carefully got out of bed. As he was about to get up he felt a hand grab his, he looked behind him and saw Hálfdán looking at him with a tired face.

— I'm sorry, Did I wake you up?— Marko asked worriedly.

The blue-eyed boy shook his head as he hugged the other boy from behind.

—How long have you been awake?—

Marko remained silent for a few seconds as he looked at the ground.

—Didn’t you sleep at all?— Hálfdán asked worriedly. —Why didn’t you tell me anything?—

—I didn't mean to bother you. You looked like you were sleeping well.— The blond sighed and rested his head on his boyfriend's neck.

— I told you, you never bother me. — Hálfdán left a kiss on his neck. — Come on, come.—

Marko lay down next to the other boy, feeling his arms wrap around him. He closed his eyes again as he felt the other boy's soft caresses and kisses.

— Relax. I'm with you.— Said the blond, feeling the brunette's heart beating strongly against his chest. — Right now it's just you and me. — He left another kiss on his forehead.

— Thank you.— Marko smiled and placed a kiss on Hálfdán's lips. — You're the best.—  The brunette smiled when he saw his boyfriend's face turn red at that comment.— I'm just telling the truth.—

— I love you, you know?— This time was Marko the one who blushed .

—I love you too.— The brown-haired boy smiled as he closed his eyes.

°°°

-Good morning.— Marko said as he placed a kiss on Hálfdán's lips. —Did you sleep well?— He asked while stroking the other boy's hair.

—Good morning.— He mumbled as he buried his head in the pillow.

Marko let out a laugh as his next response was a bunch of grunts muffled by the pillow.

— I'm going to go now.— At that moment Hálfdán quickly raised his head and abruptly got out of bed, almost falling.— Calm down, you'll hurt yourself.— He said as he put his hands on the other boy's shoulders. — I slept very well thanks to you.— He said, leaving a kiss on the blond's cheek.

— No, stay.— The other complained while hugging Marko.— At least have breakfast with me.—

Marko laughed and hugged Hálfdán back.

—Okey.—

•••

THANKS FOR READING🌸🌸.

I have to admit this is a lot longer than I expected, but I ended up liking it!!I'm so sorry if there are some poorly translated parts! I hope that doesn't ruin the reading experience.⁠·⁠´⁠¯⁠'⁠(⁠>⁠▂⁠<⁠)⁠´⁠¯⁠'⁠·⁠.

I actually came up with this idea because they're both my favorites, and in my other  story as a joke I made them have one of those friendship relationships where they joke about being a couple, and I ended up liking the idea...

LOVE YOUUU 🌸🌸

[jules-has-notes]

Headless Horseman — Geoff Castellucci music video

It's no secret that Geoff enjoys mid-20th century Disney tunes and story songs. Nor that he's a fan of iconic bass singer Thurl Ravenscroft. So when he was contemplating what song to record for his first solo Halloween video, he dipped into all of those pools and came up with this spirited musical retelling of Washington Irving's classic ghost story. Take a few minutes and enjoy the ride.

Details:

title: The Headless Horseman (bass singer cover)

original performers: Bing Crosby & Jud Conlon's Rhythmaires for The Adventures of Ichabod and Mr. Toad (1949); heavily inspired by the Thurl Ravenscroft version from "The Legend of Sleepy Hollow / Rip Van Winkle" single release (1963)

written by: Don Raye & Gene de Paul

arranged by: Geoff Castellucci

release date: 10 October 2020

My favorite bits:

kicking things off with a classic villain laugh 😈

the jaunty shuffle of the instrumentation

that fantasticly spooky singspiel narration through the first verse

the jumpscare of his first teleportation straight toward the camera

lead Geoff's unsettled expression when the noggins start singing the chorus

the meta humor of the decapitated trio only singing in their head register because they have no chests

the contrast of the trio's high harmonies on the end of the second chorus and lead Geoff's deep ♫ ⇘ "beee-waaare" ⇘ ♫

the middle head's gleeful anticipation in the build-up to the ending

that final subharmonic drop, guh

Trivia:

This video was filmed at Geoff's parents' house using decorations from their garage. Clearly, a love of Halloween runs in the family.

He joked in the YouTube premiere chat that there were only three partial clones instead of the four that had appeared in his previous videos because "Joff didn't make it, sadly. The horse ate him." and that "The backup Geoff's were such divas to work with!"

He also quipped in the YouTube comments that the heads looked so happy while singing about their own decapitations due to "Hypoxia." (What a nerd. (affectionate))

This rendition received a nice bit of praise in the YT comments from a fellow deep-voiced theme park alumnus who had played Brom Bones and narrated the Sleepy Hollow seasonal attraction at Disney World's Fort Wilderness resort.

Geoff would lose his head again a couple years later in VoicePlay's "Golden Hour" video, and once more in his Halloween 2023 video for "Jack's Lament" from The Nightmare Before Christmas.

He posted this video on TikTok three years after its initial release on YouTube and Facebook as part of his Halloween offerings.

Fellow singer Brian Hull recorded his own version of this song, closer to the original Crosby arrangement, five years later. The two both had cameos in Peter Hollens's "Epic Christmas Movie Medley" music video later in 2020.

[silken-threads-bah]

Hello!! We saw ur jackalope headmate pack and loved it, we were wondering if you could do a headmate that's a harpy? Thats one of our favorite mythical creatures!!

I made two, one based on the mythological harpies that we have read about and another one based sort of off of me because I am similar to a harpy species-wise. If you want me to change anything, you may send another ask in and I will do it :> Also, you did not specify whicu template to use but I went with the longer one for both. - Raphael

Name: aello, ocypete, Robin, Wren

Age: ageless

Pronouns: she/it (could also use: wing/wings, claw/claws, ae/aer, avi/aves)

Gender: fem agender, she does not identify or conform to human standards of gender

Orientation: lesbian

Source: n/a

Roles: persecutor, anger holder

Personality: spiteful, holds grudges over small things for a long time, if she starts to hate you it is very difficult to get back on her good side, a bit of a diva at times, tries to get what she wants by being dramatic, tries to hurt other before they can hurt it

Likes/interests: flying, watching the clouds move, watching nature documentaries (she finds peaceful ones boring and prefers to watch the ones where everyone dies in the end)

Dislikes: peace and quiet, annoying people, basically anyone talking to her unless they are being incredibly respectful, having to apologize or be nice

Kins: harpy eagle

Other/extra info: very tall, over 8 feet. Has very piercing eyes and tends to stare into people's eyes to try to intimidate them.

Species: harpy. Do not refer to her as a person or a human, it does not like that

Faceclaim:

Name: Gabriel, Michael, Raphael

Age: adult, does not identify with an age

Pronouns: it/he - only its friends can use he/him for it. (could also use: bone/bones, ichor/ichors, claw/claws, fang/fangs, tear/tears)

Gender: masc agender

Orientation: homoromantic asexual

Source: n/a

Roles: anxiety absorber

Personality: very curious, loves to observe things, intimidating at first because it doesn't use human expressions to communicate, very kind to people it likes, takes the anxiety away from others because it does not feel anxious, very protective and possessive over those it has claimed as its own.

Likes/interests: flying, the sky, clouds and cloudless days, the moon and the sun, small animals, studying people, psychology (especially developmental psych), learning how things work they way they do

Dislikes: crowds, extremely personal questions from people it doesn't know, molting, being embarrassed

Kins: bird, angel

Other/extra info: over 10 feet tall and has to crawl when in buildings or it will not fit. Has piercings eyes and does not realize others may feel uncomfortable looking into them

Species: harpy, it prefers to be referred to as a bird instead of a person, human, or any gendered term.

Faceclaim:

[castlebyersafterdark]

I think with mbb, like a lot of celeb gossip (not all of it), there is truth to it which at times gets exaggerated. The fandom has a tendency to turn her into a diva which I think is unfair and sexist. It was likely a combination of: - not understanding the show and ending up being surprised by the ending as a result - having people around her (her family and fans) who tell her she's a big star and setting her apart from the other kids - being tired of being on the show for most of her life and just wanting to move on (several cast members have expressed this. It's fair they want this.) I think child stars have it so hard so I try to be empathetic about that. It makes a big difference if they have a strong support system in their personal lives and I think this is why I always got the vibe that mbb wasn't always adjusting well compared to the other kids. It seems like her parents just use her to make money which is why she has tons of business and endorsement deals (an absurd amount imo, it truly looks like she is a cash cow for the people around her. there is no direction or focus with any of her interests.) It also rubbed me the wrong way that she gets paid more than anyone even people like Winona. I wonder if this caused tension? I remember during the Friends reunion a few years back that the cast was applauding David Schwimmer for making sure they all got paid equally even though in the beginning he got the most attention from fans. It put them all on even ground. This would be especially frustrating if she has little screen time this season, which it seems is likely. If she gets paid the most and isn't there much of her it's unfair. Her team clearly doesn't care about this. I don't think she is better in terms of talent than her cast mates but it seems like her family and team believe this is true and she is struggling to navigate this. There was a story a while back about her father demanding an insane amount of money from her first acting job and she has let slip some concerning things about her family always arguing about money growing up. She mentions that she got called "mature for her age" a lot which is always what kids say when their parents don't act mature enough and they have to pick up the slack. I think it's why she feels adult enough to be married so young even though it doesn't seem like she's emotionally mature enough. I always thought she was the more immature one out of the cast. This plus she always talks about how she always found it hard to make friends. I feel bad for her but I also think she is probably hard to deal with sometimes and it's probably the people around her to blame and she needs to work through it. ST was always an ensemble cast and I think the main reason she got more attention was because she shaved her head and not because of her superior acting talent. It made her stick out. My worst fear is that she will act out during promo not realizing that a gay love story is going to need the full support of the cast or her behavior is going to distract from that. Curious to see how much promo she ends up doing and with who -I suspect mostly with David or on her own and probably the bare minimum. (but also, are we placing bets that she announces a pregnancy during the promo tour so that ends up being the discussion lol. It's either that or a divorce I'm sorry.)

I know this is mainly a foah blog but they aren't doing much right now lol. I think the reason this cast gets gossiped about a lot is because there isn't any real credible drama with proof. Which on a show this big with everyone in the world watching their every move is very impressive. They either truly have no drama (or very minimal) or they have a very talented person covering it up. We will know in about 10 years I guess lol.

☀️💫☀️💫☀️💫☀️💫☀️💫☀️💫☀️💫

[angstics]

this post about lesbian divas rlly delighted me. it's fun to see this niche topic talked about and expanded on with lots of examples. soooo i compiled all the responses as of 21/09/23 10:30pm EST and put them in a spreadsheet. then ranked them by how much of a diva i consider them lol

first off, the general list. i found 152 unique responses in the replies, tags, and comments. some were only first names so i didnt bother researching into who the poster was talking about. images for ease of viewing:

second... what is a diva?? clarifying where im coming from is important to understand my upcoming opinions. i should make clear that im talking about DIVAS as in DIVA WORSHIP as in LIZA MINNELLI-BARBRA STREISAND-BETTE DAVIS-LADY GAGA etcetera. dykes can see these female celebs as divas as well, but what the original post touches on is the male diva.

this rthko ask explains the diva well. you should also take a look at scholarly articles and books -- divas have been a part of recorded gay culture and esp gay male culture and drag queen culture forever -- the term isnt concrete. rthko says that "there's no real formula" but lists these typical features of a diva:

larger than life -- glam, humor, charisma? would a drag queen impersonate them?

theatrical / proximity to theatre

sexy / horny -- rthko notes here that these arent requirements, citing liza's lack of sexual overtness

strength

niche -- can be popular but not a general crowd-pleaser

gay rights supporter -- before it was cool

now rthko is talking about female divas, even noting the blind spot for bi/lesbian fans and artists. i say you can apply the same features to male celebrities to identify the male divas dykes idolize. i should note that some of the ppl on the list are women or genderqueer. so the list is not entirely male.

another note: im putting so much emphasis on DIVAHOOD because it's SUCH a specific term. not all icons, "weird little guys", "blorbos" are divas. one thing rthko doesn't touch on is how a diva often has a strong sense of self that the devotee can identify and want to emulate -- at the xtreme, leads to drag art. if they dont inspire and amaze, then are they a diva?

lets get into part 3: which of these 152 people / concepts / groups are honest to god divas? you can argue they're all Icons to some extent (the bare minimum being having a lesbian fanbase) but do they have what rthko and i (and gay culture researchers) consider to be the features of a diva?

first thing i did identify those i both recognized and "saw divahood within". ended up with 44:

then i shrunk down the list even further to 18 (again, pure opinion):

then i ranked the 44 more methodically by mapping out the 7 features of the diva:

several important notes:

this ranking is not definite -- though i tried to be fair, considering the limits to what i know, it is subjective

i dont know the histories of some of these people, so i may be missing some things. an inverse example: i know far too much about gerard way, so i had a good idea of how he fit into each feature

some of these i couldnt decide whether i should check or not. al pacino i was esp worried about... couldnt justify checking those boxes the way i can for other people

either way, my findings yielded interesting results! 3 of the most commonly talked about singer-songwriters (bruce, bob, johnny) ranked low. this may indicate that there's other features to the male diva that arent specified or dont apply to females divas / gay male devotees. perhaps defined gender expression, or “voice for lesbians”, or something else.

all of the people with a score of 4 or more can be emulated. "sex" (meaning overt sexuality) is the least common feature, after "theatrical".

though anyone can be a diva to anyone, there's a certain "canon" of who is a diva in gay circles. liza barbra bette gaga. this messy qualitative approach is an attempt to figure that out for dyke divas. i would love to talk about it more.

[elysium-the-true-faceofsalvation]

Reika's first trial MV- "Candle Queen" (Ghost and pals)

The video starts in a place that looks like a movie theater. All of the seats are filled with a white mannequin. The camera cuts to a room with a movie projector in it. A person walks over to that projector and turns it on. The camera slowly moves up to reveal that that person was Reika. She’s a formal outfit with a suit and a tie and glasses. As the projector turns on, it starts projecting a movie down at the screen of the movie theater. A countdown starts at the big screen, 3… 2… 1… And…

Ever since she was a child She always knew how to get her way Just act a little bit wild And someone will surely come to play

A movie with an animation style that was usually found in the early 1900s starts playing, also being completely in black and white. The only thing that can be seen on the screen is a lit candle in some kind of black void. A hand slowly starts to fade in as what is holding the candle. Soon enough, the black void starts to fade, revealing that the hand belonged to some kind of cartoonish version of Reika. She has a lot of over-exaggerated features, including two horns on both ends of her head, reptile eyes, a snake tongue, a black dress covered with spikes and spiked boots. The scenario seems to be the interiors of a castle. Reika takes the candle on both hands and starts to walk through a hallway, a sign can be seen pointing down to the hallway she’s walking through, it reads:

“Rooms of the royalty.”

It's a truth she took to heart But humility and patience didn't come with age She's born to play this part A diva's always center stage

As she walks, she passes through two rooms, both of them having signs on its doors that read:

“Prince’s room.”

“King and Queen’s room.”

But, the second sign has the “King and Queen” crossed off with a red marker.

As Reika continues down the hallway, she reaches another room. One that has a sign that reads:

“Princess’ room. Queen’s room.”

The “Princess” is crossed off with a red marker as well, and the “Queen” is written in a red marker. The camera changes to Reika’s face, she smirks as she looks at the door. She grabs the handle and opens it.

Toddler's cries that grow louder and louder Relishing in untestable power

As she enters the room, a throne can be seen right in the middle of it. The room is covered with hanging flame lights. Next to the throne, there’s four pedestals with candle holders on top of them, 2 of the pedestals are shorter than the others. Only 3 of the holders have candles on them, the other is empty. The candles on the shorter pedestals are out, but the candle on one of the taller ones is lit. 

Glowing red in a black and white scene The one and only candle queen

Reika walks up to the throne. She looks over to the pedestal that doesn’t have a candle on them and puts the candle she was holding on it.

Stoking the flames that burn higher and higher Royalty with a crown of fire Setting ablaze an extravagant scene

Reika then looks over to the only candle that is lit, she starts looking to the side, but her expression is unreadable. She knocks over the candle to the floor.

The one and only candle queen

The camera cuts to Reika’s back as she turns to sit down on the throne. Reika crosses her legs and rests her head on her hands and looks directly at the camera. A smile starts to slowly creep into her face. As it became a full grin, an image appears on the screen that reads as follows:

Character Introduction: The Villain.

And after it, an intro card that would usually be found in an old cartoon appears from the top of the screen. It reads:

The burning of the evil Witch Episode 10: “Getting what you deserve.”

Addicted to adrenaline And always looking for attention

The screen briefly shows the candle Reika put on the pedestal melting before the lyrics are sung. It quickly changes to Reika walking out of the castle she was in and into a path that leads to a forest. All of the cartoonish animals that were there start to run away as soon as they see her. Every step she takes, fire appears behind her.

Thought to be so genuine When she's suddenly met with apprehension

As she walks into the forest, the trees start burning because of the fire that keeps appearing behind her. As she looks back and sees the fire, her expression changes to a completely neutral one. She snaps her fingers, and the fire grows. After she does that, a small smile creeps onto her face, but it quickly fades away.

The fighting has begun And she'd do anything to get ahead

As she gets deeper into the forest, she’s suddenly met with a white mannequin standing in the middle of the path she was taking. The white mannequin was laying on the ground, blood dripping from its chest. Reika’s expression becomes one of pure terror when she sees the mannequin. She starts to sweat, not knowing what to do.

Like using people as ladder rungs And sweeping eggshells under the bed

The mannequin reaches out to her, and an image appears to illustrate dialogue:

Help! Help! Help!

Reika starts looking from left to right in a state of panic. After some time, she starts running through the path while ignoring the mannequin, moving her legs in the air for some time before dashing as fast as a bullet, leaving dust behind.

Toddler's cries that grow louder and louder Relishing in untestable power

As Reika quickly reaches the end of the path, she arrives in what looks to be a small town. There was a big sign on the entrance that read:

“Bonumvile”

Reika smirked as she looked at the sign, and then she stepped inside the town.

Glowing red in a black and white scene The one and only candle queen

The town was full of living white mannequins like the one she saw before. Reika lifted her hand, and pointed at one of the houses in the town, and it lit up in flames. All of the mannequins started running around in panic. Reika looked up at the sky and started laughing until she spotted something at the back of her eye. It supposedly was one of the townspeople, but it wasn’t a mannequin, it was a blond boy. An image appeared on the screen as the boy came into view:

Character introduction: The Victim.

When Reika saw the boy, she started grinning from ear to ear. She slowly made her way to the boy that was hunched down. He seemed to be in pain.

Stoking the flames that burn higher and higher Royalty with a crown of fire

But when Reika finally made her way to the boy, a black haired man appeared out of nowhere. He quickly stood in front of the boy, water bucket in his hands. An image appeared on screen as soon as his full body came into frame:

Character Introduction: The Hero.

The man quickly used his water bucket to throw it at Reika, dousing her in water. The water did so much damage to Reika to the point that it incapacitated her completely. She quickly pulled out a white flag as little birds started flying around her head.

Setting ablaze an extravagant scene The one and only candle queen

The townspeople quickly came running to the man and started throwing him in the air to show gratitude. Reika slowly made her way out of the town in the back, defeated. As the scene faded to black, the candle that Reika put on the pedestal from the castle came into frame. It melted all the way to its half. Quickly, the scene faded to black.

Episode END Credits Director: Reika Esaki Cast: The Villain: Reika Esaki The Victim: Riku Esaki The Hero: Yuri Ikari

The “episode” seemed to come to an end. But, the screen started glitching, and for a brief moment, it changed to real life footage. Reika was walking down the road. She stopped when she reached a house, she got keys from her purse and opened the door. Inside, there was a blond teenage boy. When he came into frame, the screen started glitching and the scene cut back to being animation usually found in the early 1900s.

Ah, but there's hope for you still Before it all comes unfurled Ah, you just need to chill It's not the end of the world

Reika is seen walking back into the castle from before after being defeated. She followed the path and reached the gate. As she reached out her arm to open it, the scene cuts.

She just can't help but be this way She lost her true self long ago Now all her friends have been pushed away Because a caricature is all they know

The candle from before is now almost completely melted. As the seconds passed, it started to reach its last straw. And soon enough, the candle melted completely and the fire went out.

Toddler's cries that grow louder and louder Everyone rushing to disavow her

The scene quickly changed to Reika entering the castle. The castle started to collapse and the music started to quicken. Reika’s eyes widened as she started to sweat. In a state of pure panic, she started to run up the stairs as fast as she could.

All alone in a black and white scene The one and only candle queen

The video started to change from animation to real life briefly. The first time it happened, it showed Reika running up a fleet of stairs. The second time, it showed her closing a window on a messy room. And the third and last time, it showed her sitting on the corner of the room in a fetal position as flames creep closer and closer to her.

Hurt by the flames that burn higher and higher Clutching a broken crown of fire All alone in the final scene

The video changed back to full animation. Reika entered the “Princess, Queen” room as fast as she could. She saw the candle she put on the pedestal earlier. It had completely melted. But, the one she knocked over was completely intact and still lit. She grabbed the candle on the floor. The camera changed to focus on her face as tears started to run down from her eyes. She looked at the candle one more time, and then ran to the window and threw the candle out of it. As she did that, she looked up to the ceiling, and as she did, it collapsed on her.

The one and only candle queen

The camera changed to show the whole castle collapsing. After some time, it cut to the candle Reika threw out of the window. It was still lit.

The camera started to slowly back off to reveal that it was playing on the screen of the movie theater from the beginning. As more of the theater came into frame, it showed that the moving theater was on fire and the seats were all empty now.

The camera now changed to the room that suited Reika was in. The room was ablaze too, but Reika could be seen in the middle of it. She was laying down on the floor.

What a pity, that candle queen