#ELIIIIIIIIII

[werewolfclaws]

my very hairy little son who contains so much violence

[razzle-zazzle]

How are you doing? :)

ELIIIIIIIIII THAT'S EVIL

[catgirltitties]

trick or teat !

ELIIIIIIIIII !!!! Happy halloween omg !! Heres a teat ! Arizona Tea Gummy !!

[satosuguhastakenovermylife]

BIRTHDAY??? BIRTH!!!! 😍🥰😄😝🤗 HAPPY BIRTHDAY RAAAAAAAAAGGGHHHHHHHHHHH

i hope it’s a great one and you get to have all the fun and all the treats you want 🥳🙌🙌🙌

RAAHHHHHHH ELIIIIIIIIII THANK YOUUUUUUU 💥🥰😍🫂

THANK YOUUUU I HOPE IT'LL BE A GREAT ONE TOO :D

I KNOW IM GETTING CAKE :D I SHALL GIVE U SOME

[yeetussfetus]

hehe thawn

ok ok ok so ik that this was an idea so long ago but i wanted to write something and like this is all i could come up with pls dont come @ me 

Eli looked at his comm, which beeped out a “NOT RESPONDING, NOT RESPONDING” every few seconds. He let out an angry sigh and shut it off, too tired to think. You weren’t responding to any of his calls and he was going to need you on the bridge soon, and he wanted to make sure that Thrawn wasn’t the one who has to go and find you, since Thrawn was always lenient with you about these things.

Truly, he had no idea how a man of such elegance and high standards fell for someone so feral, but oh well. It’s not that you didn’t do your job, it was just more of your personality. He remembers someone describing you as a raccoon in someones trash bin at 3 am, and honestly, that description fit you just well. From waking up in the early hours to make a full course meal, to climbing through the vents instead of walking through the halls, it was a wonder how you even got into the navy. Even more of a wonder on how you befriended so many higher ups.

He turned to the nearest lieutenant, and said, “stay here, I’ll try and find her. If you don’t hear from me by the time Grand Admiral Thrawn comes back, tell him to find her himself.” As he left, he let out a tiny strew of curses towards you and your little stupid antics. Of course, he still was your friend, but he was tired of having to remind you about how to be an adult.

He looked down at his command and saw that you were in… a stormtrooper living area? No, wait, you were in a nearby hallway. What the-

Now more curious than tired, he almost rushed past other officers towards the lower levels of the Chimera, not really caring about how late he was to the meeting.

--------------------------------

Finally, reaching the hallway, he turned and surprisingly, the door was closed. It wasn’t locked, though, so Eli opened it: just in time for a shopping cart to be launched straight at him. He slammed his fist on the control panel again, and the doors shut, and a few seconds later, he heard a loud BANG from the other side of the door.

He opened the door again to reveal that it was none other than you in the cart, and you almost looked happy: almost. But when you turned and saw Eli, you were expecting a tirade of concerned mom friend instincts and for him to drag you back to the bridge, telling you that Thrawn wanted you or that you were late to a meeting. What you were not expecting was for him to enter the hallway, close the doors, and say, “I’m going next, or else I’ll snitch.”

Realizing that he was serious, you said, “Oooohhh, Eli, you know snitches get stitches-” 

“Did I stutter.” 

“... no and fine, but then give the rest of them a turn.” Eli looked behind you to see maybe 4 stormtroopers who were very confused on why a commander was there and why he was talking to you, but then again, you had asked to join them on their fun, and you worked close with the Grand Admiral of the ship, so it wasn’t the weirdest thing they had seen.

Rushing the cart back to  top of the almost slanted hallway, Eli hopped in and grinning like a madman, you launched him down and for once in his life, he didn’t really care about what anyone would think about his unprofessionalism.

--------------------------------

Thrawn was checking the clock every minute, wondering why not only you, but Eli was late, which for you, wasn’t that much of a problem, but for you and Eli? Something was up, or at least, something was wrong. He looked around the room, to see that every officer in the room seemed… tired. Deciding to reschedule the meeting, since it was more of an optional one, he told the officers who arrived to take the rest of the day off, and that the meeting was to be rescheduled another day. Then, he headed out of the office to find you and Eli.

Following both of your comms was easy: what he wasn’t expecting was for you two to be near the stormtrooper quarters. Why would you be there? At this point he was almost concerned about why you would be there. He walked a little faster trying to wrap his head around the fact that you would be there of all places, but hey, it's you, he couldn’t figure you out if you had a list of things you would do on a daily basis.

--------------------------------

Reaching the hallway that your comm stated that you two were in, he hears- a wheel. A few wheels of some kind being dragged away from the door. Then, it suddenly stops. He listens closely and he was able to hear your voice, and then Elis. It sounded like you two were arguing. Of course, he wasn't able to figure out what it was about. Thrawn decided to open the door, and take a look at what you were doing. However, he chose the wrong moment to open the door, because unlike Eli, he didn’t have time to close the doors, as he saw you and Eli in a shopping cart, rolling down straight for him. 

Realizing he couldn’t just close the doors, he slid against the walls as you and Eli rushed by him with the shopping cart. He looked up the hallway and saw that whoever you two were with leaving already. He sighed and decided to let it go for them, but of course, not for you two.

He stood back in the middle of the doorway as you hopped out of the cart. Eli tried to follow, but you motioned for him to stay in the cart. He slumped back down in the cart, knowing that he could just pin the blame on you, but instead he just crossed his arms, waiting for you to say something since it seemed like you had a plan. Thrawn straightened up and stared you both down, before asking one simple question.

“Where did you get the shopping cart?”

You held up a hand with your pointer finger, and at first Eli was expecting some bullshit lie, since it wasn’t actually you or Eli to acquire the cart, but it was actually the troopers.

What he wasn’t expecting was for you to grab the handle of the cart and start booking it to wherever Thrawn wasn’t. He felt himself go to one side of the cart then another as you twisted your ways around the halls. Thrawn simply sighed and then, too tired to deal with your bullshit, he started to chase after you two. 

Eli looked behind you to see Thrawn running after you two and started to panic. “_____, why the hell is he chasing us?” “For fucks sake, you think I know- wait he's chasing us.”

You looked over your shoulder to see that yes, Thrawn, your boyfriend, was chasing you and Eli through the ship. What was even scarier was that one, he was tall, he did actually look like a murderer, and two, his face was darkened, and the only thing you could see from this far was his blood red eyes. 

Enough to scare you, you turned back to continue your way through the ship as Thrawn chased you down the many hallways, and Eli was the one with the most terror in his eyes, since Thrawn seemed to be gaining on the two of you.

--------------------------------

Tarkin walked to the bridge of the Chimera, expecting you to be there. However, surprisingly, you weren’t, and neither was the deformed fruit Thrawn. His mood quickly decreased as he turned towards the nearest officer. “Where is commander _____?” The officer stood there for a second, before he explained, “Well, sir, she is… um…”

Tarkin was about to insult the man for his slowness in responding, when Kallus appeared in front of the doorway. “Commander _____ is pushing Commander Vanto in a shopping cart while they are running from Grand Admiral Thrawn.”

Tarkin turned towards Kallus with a confused look. “What?”

Kallus pulled out a datapad that showed a few security footage that were picked up, showing you pushing Eli in a shopping cart at full speed, while Eli was screaming at something behind you. Suddenly, Thrawn came into view, running straight for the two of you. Tarkin immidialy started to move out of the room, mumbling something along the lines of, “I’m gonna beat that son of a bitch to death” as he walked out of the room. 

Kallus stood there for a moment, then shrugged his shoulders and moved on with his life. This wasn’t the weirdest thing he has seen happen with you two.

--------------------------------

lmao pls take this i had to shoot myself in the foot to get this /s. anyway if yall wanna send in a ask i guess just send it in. is it technically request?? idgaf just send it in and ill try my best. 

oh also big thanks to @fallenrepublick u really helped me get inspired for writings

[fractaldunes]

2 5 and 6 ^_^

2. A song you like with a number in the title Welcome to VA-11 Hall-A by Garoad and 123 by Sure Sure

5. A song that needs to be played LOUD F-R-E-S-N-E-L Licenseur by Emperor X

6. A song that makes you want to dance Cosmic Girl by Jamiroquai

[moony-ghoul]

☆ put this star into the inbox of your favourite blogs. it’s time to spread positivity 🌼🌼

ELIIIIIIIIII

gonna spit on you w love

[saviichico]

@eliiiiiiiiii

[iamthecomet]

☆ put this star into the inbox of your favourite blogs. it’s time to spread positivity 🌼🌼

ELI. ELIIIIIIIIII.

Eli. I love you even though you're ruining my life with your fics again and it's not fair.

[lonelypond]

AU YEAH AUGUST, Fake Dating

Love Live, NicoMaki NozoEli, 2.5K, @auyeahaugust

Summary: Nico and Eli try fake dating to boost Eli's career.

Fake It ‘Til Maki Breaks It

Donner, big, blonde, muscled, in a relationship with another woman...Eli Ayase wanted the part so badly. The Shadow Cabinet series being developed had put out a call for LGBTQ actresses for the parts of Donner and Blitzen. Eli wanted in on that short list. Her career had been stalled for awhile, a few modelling gigs, nothing like Nico’s career arc, with a starring role in a ground breaking, mostly musical romantic comedy set in an music conservatory. Nico had decided to take a break, develop a project as a director, leverage her star power into something personal.

Eli had talked to Nozomi about ways to raise her profile and as reluctant as she initially was about Nozomi’s suggestion, the more she thought about, on the way to Nico’s condo, the faster her steps got. Nico could only say no. And then laugh at her for years. Might be worth it. And Nozomi was already laughing at her now. Eli smiled, looking forward to when her girlfriend returned from Japan, but that was months away still.

Nico was sitting at her desk, taking selfies. She’d just renovated her spare bedroom as an office and had spent the last two days texting Eli about the best angle for the professional look. Eli had been sending back very unprofessional photos of the cacti on her kitchen windowsill.

“Hey, Eli, Nico figured it out without any help from you.” Nico dropped her phone, sticking out her tongue.

Eli shrugged, then slid behind Nico, hugging the dark haired woman, “I need your help, Nico.”

“Who does Nico need to hurt?” Nico jumped to her feet, hands up in Marquis of Queensbury pose, brow furrowed comically over crimson eyes, like an angry Tex Avery cartoon character.

Eli giggled and stole Nico’s seat, spinning it and stretching out her legs, “You’re adorable, Nico.”

“Nico is tough. And dangerous.”

“Dangerously cute.” Eli blew a kiss.

Nico brushed it off, muttering as she started rearranging various things on her shelf, “Flattery does not work on Nico.” Then she glared at Eli, “What’s up?”

“I need to be gayer.”

“Talk to your girlfriend.”

“She’s in Japan.” Eli sighed, “And this was her idea.”

Now Nico looked suspicious, “What was Nozomi’s idea?”

“Raising my profile by being seen in public doing date like stuff with you.”

“Everyone knows you’re already dating Nozomi.”

Eli frowned, “Turns out not so much. And I want to get on the Shadow Cabinet casting director’s radar.”

Nico scratched her chin, “Donner.”

“Donner.”

“I could make calls?” Nico offered, skipping right over the dating suggestion as if she hadn’t heard it.

“Nicooooo….”

“Eliiiiiiiiii….” Nico pfffed, “Nozomi is crazy.”

“Yes.” Eli grinned happily, unabashed in her admiration of even Nozomi’s trickster qualities.

“Nico is not.”

“Come on, Nico.” Eli scooted the chair over, wrapping her arms around Nico’s waist, forcing the smaller woman to pull her around the room, “You’ll like it. Your pics’ll be all over and you can tell everyone about directing.”

Nico broke Eli’s hold, “Why me?”

Eli chuckled, “Nozomi says I’m not your type.”

“No, generally Nico prefers SINGLE and sexy.” She waggled a finger at Eli, “Not that you’re sexy. Nico is sexy, Eli is….” Nico swept a hand up and down as Eli pouted and Nico spit out the word, “Statuesque.”

Eli leaned over the chair back, “I’ll spring for a suit so you can get your Janelle Monae Noir Town Hitchcock vibe on.”

Nico hesitated, looked at the page of the photoshoot she’d framed on her wall, Janelle Monae suited up and cocking a lighter, then sighed “Perfect cool. Nico already has the fedora. And Nico knows a good vintage shop with a tailor.”

“So?” The big eyes. Nico hated the big eyes. Eli’s blue ones gleamed with good humor and just a bit of sadness. The thing that nearly convinced Nico was that she knew how much Eli would rather be doing this with her actual girlfriend. Eli remembered something and pulled out her phone, “Nozomi said if you didn’t do this, the cards were foreboding.”

“She just likes to use fancy words.”

“Says the person who just called me something so dusty I nearly sneezed.”

Nico, arms crossed over her chest, considered. Things had been slow, papers were being signed, money was being transferred, insurance contracts were being finalized. She had about a week before the crazy started. And Eli had been a good friend since their freshman year at NU. “Three dates. Then Nico starts cinematographer interviews.”

“Agreed.”

“No tongue.”

Eli stuck out hers.

“You wish.” Nico countered.

Date one was a wedding. Nico had picked out the suit, without Eli, and when Eli saw Nico stroll into her apartment, snazzy in a charcoal and gray glen plaid, pressed and gleaming, Eli knew Nico had paid more than she’d told Eli. Boots were polished, Nico’s hand rested jauntily in her pocket, jacket undone enough that the suspender popped a bit. Crimson tie with a small black design scattered over it completed the look. Nico tilted her hat, “Feel gayer yet.”

Eli laughed and flipped her phone around, “Say hi to Nozomi.”

“Why?”

Nozomi’s laugh floated into the room, “Have her back by eleven, Nico-chi.”

Nico grabbed the phone, “Bye Mom.”

Eli had opted for a bright blue pantsuit, lacy, see through ivory camisole underneath, white Chuck Taylors on her feet, orchid in her hair, “Let’s go blow out the gender binary.”

Nico offered her arm, “Nico prefers ‘let’s Bowie.’”

The “on the way to a wedding with my best girl” rising star Eli Ayase photo Nico had posted had blown up and when they actually arrived at the venue, there was a stir at the entrance. Nico knew cameras were out, pictures would be posted, she’d even provided the hashtag: #NicoEli1st. Why not let the universe in on their first ‘date.’ The universe liked snooping. Nico found a few people who were linking to Eli’s modelling campaigns. And Eli was posting about how glad she was people could find relationships that worked for them, with a #thanksNozomi and a winky face. Interest, mild controversy, lots of talk, probably wouldn’t hurt Nico. And this mansion was gorgeous, shadows and corners and patterns and contrasts. Nico might have to consider it for a location if she ever did a murder mystery type of thing, Hitchcocky...Nico had the suit now, although unlike Cary Grant in North By Northwest, she wouldn’t let it steal the movie. Unbuttoning her jacket, while Eli found the family of her friend the bride, Nico pulled out her semi vintage Zippo with a pinup girl on it. Nico wouldn’t smoke just for mood, but as she leaned against the wall, stretching out a leg, she flicked a flame exactly as a redhead came around the corner, tripping over her leg, Nico stumbling forward, loosing her grip on the lighter, which fell on the back of the now prone redhead. Nico snatched it up, closing it, hastily patting down the person for flames.

“Get your hands off me!” The redhead pushed up, she was dressed in jeans and a hoodie. Very unsuited to a wedding.

“Watch where you’re going!” Nico shouted, scared.

“Sorry, Arsonist.” The blade of the redhead’s sarcasm was samurai worthy, her lavender eyes narrowed and daring Nico to say something.

“Nico was trying to save your life.” Nico pocketed the lighter with a flair, her heart fluttering too fast.

“Sorry, don’t need your help. Just stay out of my way.”

Nico stepped aside, sweeping out a hand, “Gladly.”

“Stupid celebrities.” The redhead muttered as she passed, which caused Nico to grin. Recognized, check.

“Nico forgives you.” Too good not to toss off a parting barb.

The responding glare was Klieg level.

Since these were Eli’s friends, as the reception started a few had wondered about Nozomi, and Eli had politely explained they were taking a time out while Nozomi decided if she wanted to stay in Japan. So Eli was just casually going a few dates to stay busy. Nico was an old friend. At this point in the story, Nico would grin and wink. The fifth time through Nico found herself distracted by a spotlight on a piano and red hair she’d seen before, now wearing a stunning purple backless dress with a train, sat at the piano, elegant fingers hovering over the keys. Nico loosened her collar, elbows on the table, staring, as the pianist began “Come Rain or Shine” and the couple took the dance floor. Eli nudged Nico so hard she nearly fell off her chair, “HEY!”

“We were just saying” Eli smiled at the matronly woman next to her, “how nice it is to not to just be trying to find a date online.”

“Nico mostly stays out of the dating pool.” Nico stated, eyes still on the redhead, who had started another song, one that Nico couldn’t quite recognized.

Eli coughed and her foot came down on Nico’s, “Until I told her I didn’t want to come to this wedding alone.”

Nico realized she must have missed a few cues. “You’ll agree, Eli is too nice to come to a wedding alone. Nico is too chivalrous for that.”

Eli smiled, her foot easing up, the matron clucked sympathetically.

“You’re terrible at this.” Eli hissed in Nico’s ear.

Nico flailed a hand toward Eli as she turned around in her chair, facing the pianist, “Leave me alone. I’m trying to figure out the songs.”

“Crazy He Calls Me” The matron offered, “Isn’t she wonderful?”

“Who is she?” Nico’s question was too quick, as she couldn’t take her eyes off the muscles revealed by the sloping back.

“Nishikino Maki. She’s crazy rich, splits her time between photography and music.” Note of pride, “I know her parents, they wanted her to be a doctor.”

“Nico’d be sick all the time.” Nico muttered.

Eli stomped again, Nico glared, Eli tilted her head in the direction of the third person at the table. Nico smiled and decided to save the day and her toes, “Nico is just a big fan of the American standard songbook and you rarely get to hear them played this well, live.”

“I know” a warm smile from the target audience, “It’s a wedding gift to us.”

Nico stood, eyes still on the piano, but a hand held out to Eli, “Shall we dance, Eli.”

“Excuse us, Geri.”

“Of course,” near drunken tittering, “Enjoy yourself, girls.”

Eli let Nico pull her into a hold, “You’re really terrible at this.”

Nico sighed, “You’re really not my type.”

“RIght there with ya.” Eli mocked Nozomi’s accent and Nico snorted.

“Nico is everyone’s type.”

“What’d the redhead do?” Eli followed Nico’s lead, amused by her friend’s antics. Nico was always worth the price of admission.

“Tried to set herself on fire with Nico’s lighter.”

Eli doubled over with laughter, evening out their heights, “You’re terrible at everything.”

Nico rolled her shoulders in a long shrug as she finally caught the pianist’s eye and winked. “Bewitched, Bothered, and Bewildered” picked up tempo, “Nico has hidden talents.”

“Charm isn’t one of them.”

Nico let Eli twirl herself out into the middle of the dance floor, pulling her close on the dancer’s return, “You’ll never know.”

“Nope. And I’m perfectly fine with that.”

“This is a dumb way to get people’s attention, you know. Nico will call people.” Nico was confidently leading them through the dancing crowd, when the pianist started to sing, “This Is The End of A Beautiful Friendship,” her voice a breathy, smooth as silk cord twisting through the crowd, Nico stopped, Eli bumping into her. The brides were dancing, foreheads touching, happily absorbed in each other. Nico and Eli shared a glance, both a little envious, both a little lonely.

“Let’s sit down.” Eli pulled Nico off the dance floor.

“Yeah. At the bar.”

“No. We are going to call Nozomi and let her hear this. It’s amazing.” Eli pulled out her phone.

“It is.” Nico settled back backwards in her seat so she could watch the pianist, “You’re hopeless.”

“And you love me.” Eli leaned over to kiss Nico’s cheek, Nico’s smile was wry.

“You’re ruining my mysterious vibe.”

Nozomi's voice cut in, “Oh Nico-chi, you’re too cute to be mysterious. Like a tiny kitten about to pounce on a dust bunny.”

“Go away Nozomi.”

“I am.”

“Well then come home so your girlfriend doesn’t try to date me.”

There was a humming, which Nico barely heard over Maki’s voice wrapping itself around “Orange Colored Sky” while Nico’s foot tapped along, “You know, Nico-chi, I think I will.”

“Nozomi!” Eli cried out, Nico glanced over her shoulder, yep tears as Eli took the phone off speaker and left the table, speaking rapidly.

Then the redhead bowed her way into a break and Nico grabbed a glass of water and a flower out of the centerpiece and angled her way to the corridor Maki had fled down.

The redhead was leaning gracefully in a breeze, a few hairs blowing, head down, hands smoothing her dress. Nico coughed and she looked up, “Oh, you.”

Nico put on her best smile, “That was amazing. And Nico doesn’t even like piano.”

An incredulous look under a sharply raised eyebrow, “Noted. I think I’ll keep playing it though. You know, for the people with taste.”

“I’m sorry about the lighter.” Nico stated, offering the flower and the flute, “It’s water.”

Maki put the flower in the flute, “No thanks.”

“The singing though, WOW…” Nico nodded, trying for sage, “And Nico is a professional.”

The other eyebrow went, although the cheeks flushed slightly. “Really.” Sarcasm stained the ceiling.

“Well, more pop stuff, but yeah.” Nico ignored the disdain. Nico sniffed the flower, then reached into her inside pocket for her card, “Had my own show. Now I’m directing.”

Maki made a big show of having no pockets and tucked the card into the band of Nico’s hat, which, although Nico would never have admitted it, might have deflated her slightly.

“Anyway,” Nico tilted her head at the taller woman, enjoying a moment of silence before saving the situation, although her words came out in a nervous rush, “Alakazam! Nico just wanted to say your voice is as pretty as you are and if Nico can ever help you out, let me know.”

“Thanks, I’m good.” The redhead swept by, flicking a hand up and it took Nico until the redhead looked back winking, settling Nico’s fedora on her head, to realize she’d lifted Nico’s hat.

“Hey!” Nico started to chase after, but then paused at the edge of the dance floor, considering. She searched for a blonde head and found it across the floor. Raising her hands to her mouth, she shouted in that direction, “Hey, Eli.”

Blue eyes locked on hers and Nico continued as Maki began to play “Fly Me To The Moon.” “We’re breaking up.”

A/N: Anonymous dropped "you asked me to your wedding but your cousin's cute" in my ask box, which seemed a fake dating natural, which turned into this, because like Nico and Eli, I am terrible at this ; ) I think the world could use some more Nico Eli friendship.

Shadow Cabinet is a good comic from the Milestone Media days, and then Donner and Blitzen spun off into The World Needs Heroes with a few others.

Take care! New kitten has pushed my to do list back.

[huesofthemorning]

Cuddling

Pairing: NozoNicoEli

Based off this video and @nozoroomie‘s tags on it from forever ago

"Eliiiiiiiiii!" Nico whined, hanging upside down off the couch and waving her arms vaguely in Eli's direction. "Come cuddle with me."

"I'm doing work."

"It's Sunday! You're not allowed to do work on Sunday."

"Hmmm." Eli continued writing, the pencil scratching away on the paper. Her hair was down, for once, the one sign of casualness she was allowing for the weekend, and strands kept brushing her cheek as she leaned over her work. Didn't she ever take the time to relax?

Nico groaned and slid off the couch. She dragged herself across the carpet to where Eli was sitting and draped herself over Eli's back. She smelled sweet, like strawberries - was she stealing Nico's soap again? No, it was more likely the half-awake Eli from the morning had simply been too out of it to notice. Maybe Nico should start hiding her stuff better.

"What work are you even doing?"

"Taxes."

"Taxes? Seriously? You're spending your Sunday doing the most boring work possible!"

"Nonsense. Taxes are fun."

"Eli, you're the most boring person in the world."

Nico could see a hint of a smile on Eli's face, even as Eli shrugged her off. Nico let out a puff of air, sprawling out on the ground. "I can't believe this. My nice Sunday afternoon, ruined because my girlfriend won't cuddle with me. This is a tragedy. A crime. You're going to go to jail, Eli. The police are going to show up any second now and throw you in jail. Gay jail. Because you need to become gayer and cuddle with me."

"Wouldn't gay jail be for people who were too gay?"

"Now you're going to obnoxious gay jail, too. Are you happy, Eli. Are you. This is going on your permanent record. Everyone's gonna know you're too much of a workaholic to cuddle with your girlfriend. How dare you. I hope you’re ashamed of yourself.”

“You know, Nicocchi, you do have two girlfriends,” Nozomi said. She was leaning against the doorway, eyes twinkling with laughter.

Nico raised her head and shot Nozomi a glare. “No one asked you.”

“Oh? And what are you going to do to me, hmm? Throw me in gay jail too?”

“No. You’re too powerful for gay jail. You have to go to super annoying gay jail instead.”

“You’re being pretty rude to someone who came all the way over here to cuddle with you.”

“I don’t have to be nice to you. You’ll cuddle with me even when I don’t want to.”

“Ah, are you admitting that sometimes you don’t want to cuddle with your girlfriend? Unbelievable, Nicocchi. You might just have to be sent to gay jail for this.”

Nico renewed the strength of her glare. “I’m too good for gay jail.”

“You’re right. I think gay baby jail is more your style, don’t you?” Nozomi flopped down between Nico and Eli, wrapping her arms around Nico and nuzzling her neck.

“Ugh, gross. You smell like dish soap.”

“You smell like someone who complains too much.”

“Of course! I only accept perfection.”

“You’re perfect enough for me, Nicocchi.” Nozomi planted a loud, wet kiss on Nico’s cheek. Nico grimaced, grabbing Nozomi’s pudgy cheeks and stretching them in retaliation. Nozomi only laughed.

There was a loud sigh from Eli, who finally set down her pencil. “You two make it really hard to concentrate, you know.” She leaned back against Nozomi, who welcomed her with a grin and a one-armed embrace.

“I couldn’t imagine why, Elichi.”

“Oh, I see how it is,” Nico grumbled. “You’ll cuddle with Nozomi, but not with me? You’re getting extra time in gay jail for that, Eli.” Nico freed herself just enough to poke Eli in the cheek and steal her reading glasses. Eli crinkled her nose in response and Nico kissed the tip of it. “What’s more fun now, huh? Taxes or cuddling?”

Eli didn’t try to hide her smile. “I haven’t decided yet. I think I need more cuddling first.”

“Then you’ve come to the right place, Eli.”

“Gay jail?”

Nico nodded. “Gay jail.”

[horrorboydyke]

ELIIIIIIIIII I LUF U 2. KLAHDLWKJDQ 

it's world friendship day!!! because of that im gonna have to shout out my amazing friends. it's a crime to not follow any of them so 👀 get to it

@akefalosthea mayur, my gay shirt buddy and brian cell co founder who i would actually die for i would ship an ugly vintage michi shirt to u if i could

@killyourdarlingsx an absolute beauty and my italian meme bee who deserves the world just please don't go out in the rain again u will get sick!!!! stay safe if you do tho, you may be older than me but i still worry

@your-local-bi meher! my cat loving friend i hope you meet a nice kitty this week and u may be a new friend but i ❤️❤️❤️ u just as much take care of urself ok

@dykejanna im currently drawing u a frog cause ily and u deserve all nice things frogs but also all the nice things too ill submit u ur frog soon

@darkdodielove u funky lil lesbian i stg i worry about u so much cause of ur inhaler but i luf u and hope ur day was good! if it wasn't i will physically fight anything that ruined it

@8102-druck selmaaaa we don't talk all that much but ily and ur love for terrible old man hats ❤️ ur so feckin valid for that and im so proud of u and wish you all the best

@waterbottle79 ikik you probably won't see this but u are doing so well with all ur college stuff and u deal with my 4am crackheadery and u deserve an award for dealing with those things consecutively

@softamira i want to frame all of your art and fill my wall with it i stg you are incredible and ilysm thanku for everything you do except naruck that was a crime ❤️❤️

@manthastop sadly the only one here i see irl and gotta say i miss uuuuu luckily we get to see each other soon!!!! i can't wait :'))))) hope ur day has been filled with love

[yeetussfetus]

run.

aight this one is kinda silly, i like it but then i dont ya know anyway the way i got this idea is really weird imma explain it at the end and uh yeah enjoy

words: 2341

warnings: cursing, alcohol, fighting (implied)

Pryce walked down the long hallways with her coffee, along with her many files about the latest rebel activity. To be honest, she was extremely proud of how it turned out. She had worked hard on this particular file the night before, also why this was her 5th cup of coffee that morning. However, she was sure that when high command read the file, it would all be worth it. Of course, considering this was the Empire, she also had low expectations, but no matter what they had to say, she was sure that this was going to be good.

But she was so in thought of her little project that she wasn’t paying attention to where she was going. And in result, she bumped into you. Fortunately she didn’t spill her coffee, but she did drop her files, which was technically a datapad. You reached down to pick it up, and seeing that it was already turned on you read a little bit of the file. Pryce did not stop you, as she wanted to see what you would say about her hard work. 

You smiled politely while reading it, “Wow, Pryce, this is really good. I’m sure high command will agree.'' Pryce's pride shot through the roof, but it immediately died out when your smile dropped. “Oh, you have a typo here. It’s supposed to be ‘their’ not ‘they’re’.”

Handing it back to Pryce, you started to walk towards your destination. You turned back to give her a comforting smile. “I’m sure the high command won’t notice, though. See you around!”

Watching you walk off, she gripped the datapad with unknown force. “I fucking hate my job.” 

Deciding that the high command could go fuck themselves, she headed towards the bridge where they would be waiting for her work.

--------

Eli was actually surprised with how well Pryce’s work was. Not saying that she was terrible at her job, but this was extremely well put. Besides a few typos, but if the rest of the officers wanted to bitch they could bitch.

Thrawn was certainly impressed, and even though it might’ve been hard to read it, it was obvious that he was from his almost non existent facial expressions. He turned to look towards you to see if you were the same way, but he didn’t see you at all. He looked around the bridge, only to see that you weren’t there. Were you late? No, if you were, you would’ve been here by now. 

Thrawn seemed to see how confused Eli was, and leaned towards him. “If you’re wondering what they mean by the attacks on naboo, they mean the ones that happened last week.” Eli turned to him, a little offended that he thought Eli didn’t understand what they were talking about. “Yeah, I got that, I’m trying to look for _____, have you seen her?”

Thrawn straightened himself, before replying, “Last I heard, she was heading to Tarkin's fleet for a meeting. She will be back by tonight, so do not worry.” Eli felt a little hurt that you wouldn’t tell him, but then again, Tarkin liked to pull you from Thrawn's fleet for random meetings, probably just shit talking sessions, so he didn’t hold it against you.

They all turned their heads towards the intercoms when they heard the long ‘beep’ that played out when something long was about to be announced. Eli sighed and waited for a few seconds. But nothing played. Confused, he looked around the room to see if everyone else had heard it. They did, and they were all looking confused as well. Then, there was the faintest sound of audio being picked up, before it seemed to be… playing a recording.

Before anyone was able to ask what was going on, strange music started to play through the halls, and then Eli realized that the song that was playing was the “Coconut Mall” theme from Mario Kart. It got a little louder, then a little  lower, before it stopped being adjusted. 

Everyone in the room just stood there, listening to the theme song, wondering what the hell was happening. Finally, after almost 2 minutes, the song ended. Thrawn stared at the intercoms with a slight glare, but he turned back to the group to talk about Pryce’s excellent work  but got interrupted when something else started to play. This time it was caramelldansen, out of all the songs. 

Eli turned to his datapad and opened a new browser and looked at the security cameras, where he then went to the area where they would play the weekly announcements or just emergency alerts. However, the place was in shambles, with the people who were supposed to be controlling the comms were all trying to stop whoever was messing with them. Eli tapped thrawn on the shoulder and showed him the camera footage. Thrawn stared at the panicking staff, before he pulled out his own comm, which could technically be broadcasted to the entire ship and walked over to one of the control panels and inserted it into the panel. 

After a bit of typing, he was pleased with what he could do, and pushed a button that would technically override the comms, but before he even spoke, the control panel beeped, before a error message played out on the screen, reading, “CANNOT OVERRIDE EMERGENCY COMM”. Thrawn seemed to be even more confused, and continued to type away at the panel, but the same error just appeared on the screen. The typing started to become louder and louder almost as if he was trying to drown out the song that was playing overhead, but it was no use. 

Whoever planned this was extremely smart in making sure that they wouldn’t be able to get the comms fixed. Finally, in an act of frustration, Thrawn just raised his fist and banged it onto the screen panel. However, the spinning wheel of death came to a halt, revealing the words, “CANNOT OVERRIDE EMERGENCY COMM”. With this, thrawn took out his comm, and then tried to broadcast his own voice, but the same message played. By this point, the song was almost over, and everyone thought that this would be it. Whoever was playing this prank was sure that they were going to be caught.

But unfortunately, it didn’t.

After a few seconds, a new song played. All Star by Smash Mouth. 

By this point many of the technicians were heading towards the intercom area, to see what the hell was going on. Most of the crew on the bridge were impatiently waiting for the speakers to be fixed and so that they could find whoever was playing the songs. Pryce looked like she wanted to murder someone for ruining her presentation, and Thrawn had a resting bitch face, which eli was able to tell from the way he would galre at anything and anyone. 

The first time the song ended, everyone was waiting for which new weird song would play. But the same song repeated itself. Which was weird, considering the fact that they had played a different song each time. But Thrawn didn’t seem to care, simply talking over the song telling people to resume their normal duties and that the song should be down by the end of the day. How wrong he was.

The song played for a third time, and at this point Eli was starting to focus more on the song then his work. Whoever is doing this is gonna wish that they were hiding…

Then, a fourth time. Pryce came into Thrawn's office where Eli resided with Thrawn, because, well, Thrawn had his room soundproof, so that he could scream in peace when the Empire was complete bullshit. Since the speakers in his room were designed to be quieter so he could work in peace, it was a godsend for Eli, especially now. 

The fifth time it played, it almost seemed as if the quiet speakers were useless. Eli was starting to get the song stuck in his head and it was bothering the hell out of him. Pryce was trying to revise her presentation in case she missed something, but everytime she went to edit it, her brain tried to write the words she was hearing. Thrawn was just about ready to reveal a flask filled with alcohol if the song didn’t stop.

The sixth time was when shit hit the fan. In the middle of the song, Eli heard running from outside the door, and he then heard, “WHICH ONE OF YOU FUCKS ARE DOING THIS, I’M GONNA BEAT YOU ALL TO-” and then the sound of people fighting each other. Someone probably got tackled to the ground. Eli didn’t even want to go outside to see what was happening.

The seventh time was complete insanity, Eli was able to hear the screaming and fighting outside. He had no idea how this would have happened on the ship, but it was absolute chaos. Looking at the security footage, there were at least 6 different viewpoints with multiple fights. He was just about to call a goddamn containment breach.

Then, out of nowhere, a new song started to play. It was Wii music. He was almost able to hear the cries of relief from the crew, and as it played he tried to fall asleep to drown out his problems. He listened to the calming music of the speakers that brought peace to his mind, and he was about to fall asleep, when.

“SOMEBODY ONCE TOLD ME,” 

Screams could be heard from across the ship as the eight time, and people started up their fights again. Eli saw from the corner of his eye Thrawn pulling out a datapad and he started to type to someone. This continued for a minute before he pulled out a holopad and turned it on. He pulled out your contact and called you. When you answered you were sitting down somewhere, holding a random datapad probably from Tarkin.

“Thrawn? Are you good?” Thrawn seemed almost to cry in relief when you answered his call. “No, my dear, I am not.” He then went on to explain the situation, before he hung his head low, almost wanting to die having to explain this to you of all people. You stared at him for a moment, before reassuring him, “Don’t worry, I’ll get them to send someone with experience to help you out. They’ll be there in about half an hour.”

Well. Could be worse. Eli found two pillows and stuck them on his ears trying to drown out the song.

------

The ships came earlier than expected. Then again, the place where Tarkin usually resided wasn’t too far from their post, but he wasn’t expecting Tarkin to bring about 4 ISD to the scene. 

However, it became apparent why when Tarkin stepped off the smaller ship that had been sent out. Along with you. The song had still been playing, the goddamn tone was getting to Eli so much. 

Walking through the halls was a mess in itself. People were trying to restrain others, they were fighting each other, it reminded you of the time the whole Life Day incident happened. But this wasn’t the same. 

When the two of you finally reached Thrawn's office, the place had been put on lockdown, still the damn song playing. You did have to admit it was starting to get annoying having to hear it on repeat. You couldn’t imagine what it would be like for an hour.

Walking into Thrawn's office, you saw Eli in the corner, on the floor, with two pillows held up against his ears, Pryce sitting on one of the chairs with her elbows on her knees, head down, and her hands covering her ears, and Thrawn had a tipped over flask on his desk. Overall? A fucking mess.

However, before anyone could explain anything, the music stopped mid play. It was a relief to everyone. Pryce lifted her head like she was seeing an angel for the first time. Thrawn looked almost the same, but his eyes held relief. Eli didn’t hear it stop because the pillows were so good as sound blockers that he didn’t have to worry. 

Tarkin gave a smirk, before asking, “So, you needed help with what exactly?”

------

That same day Thrawn held a bounty to whoever could find out who did the prank. A lesser reward for whoever had any info on them, but it was all the same. The ship had to be cleaned up from the whole ordeal. Multiple cleaning crews from other ships had to be requested. Even the Emperor got attention for what happened and had a good laugh (in private). 

Vader was supposed to appear for a meeting the next day, but it had to be postponed from the damage.

You, Thrawn and Eli had a secondary, more private meeting in Thrawn's office, where Eli explained what happened. You had to hide your laugh as a cough, which worked better than expected.

After the mini meeting was over, Thrawn left, but you asked Eli to stay for details on what happened that you knew Thrawn wouldn’t want to remember. Eli begrudgingly agreed and told you what happened in detail. You had a good laugh, and Eli did as well, long forgetting his anger towards the situation. After a bit of laughs, you gathered your things, telling Eli that you would be getting on with the report you had to give to Tarkin about the situation.

However, before you left, you turned back to face him. “You know, I’m surprised that those emergency comms had that much range. I was expecting it to die out, you know? But I guess they’re called emergency comms for something.”

Eli stopped, dead in his tracks, and turned back to face you. You gave an innocent smile, before saying, “Hope you didn’t mind. See you around, Eli.”

Eli was left with a feeling of betrayal from one of his closest friends, and a feeling of emptiness.

------

did it. ok so the way how i got this was that i was scrolling through someones blog and i found a funny video about john mulaney and that whats new pussycat and i was like oh hey didnt something happen to my brother and so i asked him about it and long story short in highschool someone had played pumped up kicks like 3 times i think and there was a fight somehow that ended up with someone going to the hospital so yeah. also i havent edited this much so pls tell me of any mistakes lmao anyway heres the guys who imma tag:

@theninjahobbit666 @danger-xylophones @justalittlecloud @queenie-chi-cosplay @ssevent33n @fallenrepublick

[saviichico]

Oo cellphone ko da @eliiiiiiiiii ay HSHAHAHS labyu <3

[yeetussfetus]

square up

ok so this is the piece i was talking about and basically it was something for chrismas (in the story its called life day) so theres that. more notes at the end ig

warnings: fighting, cursing, alcohol, drinking, c h a o s

words: 2205 (damn)

Eli was too tired for a “meeting” with anyone today, but he still decided to hear Agent Kallus out. After all, it was rare that the imperial officer even asked for anything, so it must have been something big. 

And while, technically it wasn’t as big as Eli predicted, it still was something he found weird.

“Please, Eli, I don’t care what you have to do, just please help me out this one time!” Kallus was almost about to drop to his knees begging, and what for, you might ask? Life Day was a little more than a day away, and it was on a Friday. Of course, everyone had thought it would be a great idea to plan a Life Day party for the meeting instead of their usual bullshit, but it didn’t go as planned. 

The last meeting was full of angry names, curses and one (1) knocked out director. So, of course, the only people who had planned the party peacefully were the only ones who made the final decisions. Which, of course, was you, Eli and Yularen. Kallus wasn’t present at the meeting, and Pryce had passed out early throughout the meeting, so neither of them were able to even plan anything. This is where Eli's problems began. 

Kallus was actually looking forward to the Life Day celebration, because, in his own words, “It’s a festive day, what’s more to like?” Eli had a sneaking suspicion it was for something else. And he was correct. Since Kallus wasn’t present at the meeting and wasn’t elected to plan out the party, he had no say in what they served, including drinks, food, and most importantly, the type of alcohol. This is why Kallus was begging Eli to help him smuggle a certain type of beer onto the ship for the party.

Eli pinched the bridge of his nose while he spoke, “Why can’t you just do this yourself?” Kallus stopped for a moment, before continuing, “This particular… the beverage is, well, technically, prohibited in official Imperial territory because its known for being produced by rebellious groups.” Kallus saw how Eli was grabbing his things, probably to leave, so he rushed to the doorway to block Elis only escape.

“HOWEVER,” Kallus continued, “I have placed a shipment to arrive near a docking bay at the next planet that we are heading to. All I need is a distraction and I can bring the shipment aboard.” Eli still looked skeptical, but Kallus intervened, “Not only that, but the shipment is small, only about the size of the meeting table, so it won’t even get in the way!”

Eli thought for a moment, wondering what he should do. “Why do you even want this beverage at the party, anyway? What’s so good about it?” Kallus straightened up, before he said, “I have tasted this drink before it was classified as illegal, and it was the best thing I have ever tasted. I can assure you that this sacrifice will be worth it.”

Well, usually when it's about food, Kallus has terrible taste, but when it's alcohol…

Eli sat for a moment, wondering if he should take up Kallus’ offer, and thought of the benefits and liabilities. Finally, he answered Kallus. “Alright, I’ll make a distraction for tomorrow. What time will the shipment be here?”

Kallus showed a face of relief, before he finally responded “Yes, thank you! Oh- the shipment is at 0900.”

Eli nodded and watched as Kallus walked out of the room with surprising confidence. Eli picked up his datapad, only to realize one thing: Who was going to distract an entire cargo bay? At this he suddenly regretted his decision. He set his datapad down, wondering who he could trust and who was someone willing to even do that. Thrawn? No, he isn’t particularly fond of Kallus. Pryce? Would probably use it as blackmail for something. Yularen… yeah, no, he already gets hungover. That left only you. 

He made a mini checklist that would help him determine who would be best for this task. You were someone he trusts. You would definitely be willing to pull it off. And you definitely could distract an entire hangar. He pulled out his comm and pulled up your number, and started to call you. When you answered, you appeared to be sitting at a table. You looked to someone off screen and asked them to give you some privacy before turning back to Eli. “Eli, what can I do for you today?”

Eli shuffled a bit, before asking, “I was wondering if you could help me distract a hangar bay for some beer.” You tilted your head, and asked “What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” Eli explained, “Kallus wants to drink a certain beer that's been prohibited by the Empire for the party on Friday, but he still ordered some and they’re going to arrive on the moon we’re landing on tomorrow, and he needs a distraction to bring the drinks in the ship. I was wondering if you were able to distract the hangar while he smuggles the shipment into the meeting room.”

You sat there for a moment, and finally responded with, “Fuck it, I’m bored.” Eli smiled and said his goodbyes before pocketing the comm and walking out of the room towards his post for the day.

-------------------------------------

You had already gotten a plan, somehow. It wasn’t your best, but it still was a plan. One of your good friends, Pryce, was talking about how she had to settle a dispute with two stormtroopers that were angry at each other over something, something about it was about a woman named Elisa. The first part of your plan was to acquire a datapad that one of the stormtroopers who was in the feud used quite often and make a fake conversation. You took note that his name was Trenk.

You walked down the hallway, towards the stormtrooper quarters, and stopped at a living area. It wasn’t lavish, but it wasn’t disgusting, either. It was modest. You saw two people in the room itself, and then the same two started to argue. You made your presence known, and as they both were about to throw hands, they saw you enter the room and immediately stopped. You smiled and asked, “Hello. I see that you two are busy. However, I need a datapad from this particular core. The higher ups have noticed some security breaches, and they need some form of evidence to prove their theories. If you have one, or if you know someone in this core to have one, please tell HR.” You were about to turn around when you saw one of them pull out a datapad and hand it to you. You smiled, “Thank you. This will be returned to you in the morning, earliest 0800.”

And with that, you left and started phase II of your plan. When you walked into your office, you pulled his messenger tabs and looked for this ‘Elisa’, and finally found her. Looking through the messages, you found a few that were a little more spicier than the others. You screenshotted them, and then edited the dates to more recent times. You smiled and then put the datapad down for the next part of your plan. You looked at what was going to be picked up that day, on the planet, and made sure that the placement of certain items were going to be placed in a certain way.

With that, you returned to your normal duties until the next day.

-------------------------------------

Walking towards the hangar that was picking up items and disposing of others, you saw the trooper who was having the fight with Trenk walking towards his post. You rushed up to him, and held out the datapad. “Trooper, thank you for your contribution- Oh, I see you're not him. Hmm. Well, I saw you with him, so if you could give this to him when you see him, that would be appreciated.” You turned around, and then followed it up with, “Oh, and when you see him, please tell him to refrain from using Imperial property for his personal use. That might lead to another data breach and its unprofessional.”

The trooper looked back at you, and while you walked off you were able to hear his angry tapping trying to find out what you were talking about, and since he only saw one of the screenshots, he wasn’t able to tell they were edited. He cursed and rushed past you, towards the hangar.

You watched as he turned the corner, before comming Kallus, sending him “Now would be a good time to smuggle your drink on”. You strolled past some troopers to see what was about to go down.

When you did reach the hangar bay, you noticed that the chaos had already started. Both troopers had thrown hands with each other, but this caused some of the items that were being disposed of to knock over which somehow caused another fist fight. Then you noticed that one third of the hangar was just fighting each other. The other third were just trying to stop all the fighting, and then finally the final third were cheering the fight on. And in the corner of the hangar, you saw a tarped hover cart was pushing its way towards the entrance.

-------------------------------------

Thrawn looked through the security cameras, watching as chaos erupted in the hangar. He saw one person body slam somebody. Another grabbed someone and threw them against two other people who were fighting with each other. Tarkin snickered behind him. Yularen was worried about the cargo, and Eli just stared in astonishment as he saw chaos unfold. He knew you were good at these things: he just didn’t realize how good you were.

Finally, he saw Thrawn reach over to speak on the PA. “This is Grand Admiral Thrawn, if you happen to be in hangar bay 6, please refrain from punching your peers, there is cargo that still needs to be delivered. I repeat, hangar bay 6, refrain from punching your peers. There will be court martials for those who do not comply.”

Slowly but steadily, the four men saw that people were being pulled apart and medics were able to rush in to help the injured. Of course, nothing too serious, but it was a complication in the day. Eli looked at Thrawn, who looked like he just wanted to be swallowed into a hole, while Tarkin was just refraining from laughing. Yularen just pulled out a flask and downed the bottle.

This was going to be a long day.

When the Chimera was able to get back into space, everyone had to attend a mandatory meeting where Thrawn stated that if there was a problem with another peer that they worked with, it was better to work it out without fighting. You just sat in the back, smiling.

-------------------------------------

“Damn, Kallus, you really pulled through with these drinks.” You took another sip of the beer that he had brought. It was only your 2nd, since you weren’t an avid drinker, but everyone else was either wasted or just drunk. You yourself were starting to feel woozy. Kallus smiled and took a sip of his own drink. He was starting to get a little drunk himself.

“You know, you’re not supposed to be starting fights.” he said, watching as the others talked amongst themselves. “I know, but then we wouldn’t have any beer would we?” you held up your glass, offering a toast to him. He did the same, and then you both drank the rest of your glasses. You were about to continue the conversation, when you saw Thrawn slam his glass on the table and stumble over, point to Kallus and say, “Square up, bitch.”

Kallus looked surprised for a moment, before asking, “E-Excuse me, sir?” Thrawn stared right into him with anger in his eyes. “Your being too friendly with my wife-” “Sir, she isn’t your wife-” “not YET-” “Thrawn, it’s fine, here, lets go and-” Thrawn finally reached Kallus and just straight up punched him, knocking the blond down, and then just start beating him up. You leaned against the wall as Kallus regained his composure and then grabbed Thrawn's collar and tossed him away before getting up, grabbing his shirt along the way, and then hurling him onto the table. At this point they had everyone's attention. Deciding to document this, and placing it in the wondrous hall of “Times Thrawn should’ve taken his own advice”, you posed in the camera, and then took the actual picture. 

Not looking at the fight in front of you, you study the photo and see Thrawn and Kallus beating the shit out of each other, Yularen panicking, Eli trying to get Thrawn to stop, Pryce posing since she saw you taking a photo, and Tarkin and Krennic seemingly betting on who was going to win. Vader was just standing in the corner. You titled the photo “If you have a problem with your peers, please attempt to try and solve the problem diplomatically.” you saved the photo and then put your drink down to go and help your boyfriend.

-------------------------------------

ok so this was actually really fun to write ngl bc halfway i was like “i should just throw this out” and then i watched the meme that made me want to write this and i was like “nah just finish it” so heres the chrismas present. its for u pls take it lmao. 

i need to go to bed. anyway im gonna go eat some tamales goodbye i love you 

edit: tagging @fallenrepublick bc ik u like chaotic shit

[yeetussfetus]

this is suppsoed to be for fun. to anyone who remembers, i proposed an idea for the CHEG to be a mysteriuos group that almost no one knew anything about it. well i will be explaning more in this one. 

the story itself will be about a random ISB agent name Arus Dara whos a guy who needs some money and decided to use hiss knoledge for the Empire. in these first three logs, he will explain that his logs will be for himself, which will explain why he cusses in some parts. more info about him at the bottom.

words:1361

warnings: cussing, alcohol mention (idk if i made it obvious when its mentioned but just in case)

ENTRY LOG 1

This is an entry log by agent Arus Dara of the ISB, Empire. This is a personal log that is about my next mission, or, at least I hoped it would be my next mission, about the infamous group known as CHEG in the Empire. A little backstory on this particular group is that… well, almost nothing is known about them, besides the fact that it's so secretive and high up in the Empire that even the Emperor was a bit confused when he heard the name pop up, although that could be because he's hiding the fact that he's in it.

That doesn’t matter, though. The group in of itself hasn’t caused any issues for a while now, and that's probably the only reason why they haven’t tried to figure out who was in it. However, my boss, who is, by all means, the biggest bitch I’ve had to work with in the Empire so far, has requested that I look into the group. When I asked why, she didn’t specify, but she did tell me that I would get a promotion, which is extremely rare for someone like me, this young in their career. 

Not only are the benefits great for the position she offered me, but I would only have to work for a couple more years before I could retire with that much money. It would be a great chance to get money for my mother. So, I did what any rational person would do, and I accepted.

Unfortunately the details were a lot more complicated than I thought. For starters, she's not the one who wanted me to find out about the group. It was someone way higher up. I was able to tell from the fact that, while their face was blurred along with their voice, they looked to be on a Star Destroyer. And a fancy office. 

Well, the office itself wasn’t fancy, it was almost barren, but from the looks of it, the guy could afford whatever he wanted. He filled me in on what I was going to need to do: Figure out who's in the group, and report to him about my findings. Sounds about easy enough. And then it wasn’t.

There is a reason why almost nothing is known about the info on this group, and that’s probably because they are so good at hiding whatever dirty things they do. The only things I have is the name and possible candidates, all of them being high ranking officers. 

I might have to request something to help me from my new… “boss”, if you want to call it that. For now, however, this will have to be it. Arus Dara, out.

ENTRY LOG 2

Well, that went better than expected. For the past few days I’ve been trying to find out who might be in the group, and it's been… terrible. Terrible trying to find out how to do this. Terrible trying to figure out how to even find these guys. It's unbelievable, I seriously don’t know how these guys even hide this much, social groups who the Emperor is in have more info then this. Is there someone who has a bigger role in the Empire then the fucking Emperor?

It’s just been… a few stressful past days. However, I think I have the solution. The other day, I got the balls to ask my “boss” to get an employee log. Surprisingly, he didn’t know what that was. I had to explain to him that it was just a system that said when a staff of the Empire got into work and when they left. It was mandatory for everyone, except a select few, and if he didn’t know about it, he must be really high up in the Empire. And extremely oblivious to what normal people have to do. 

I really hope I’m not giving this info to someone who's a spoiled brat. I could never live with myself if that happened.

That doesn't matter right now. Basically I had to ask him to give one to me of people close to and the people themselves of that list I had talked about earlier. From the past 3 months, since that was after people tried to figure out who they were. I haven’t found much so far, but I’ll look through the list again.

…

So far I've got one person that I’m pretty sure is part of the CHEG, and his name is Agent Kallus. His entry's logs are all over the place, and considering what he does in his free time is never present, he's probably part of the group. One minute he’ll be out the door, the next hour he’ll do the same. I’ll have to visit his ISD soon.

Well, that’s out of the question, his ISD is the Chimera. Also known as the ISD where Grand Admiral Thrawn resides. Grand Admiral- either his reputation is messed up, or he doesn’t know how stupid his employees are. Doesn’t matter. What matters is that I got my info, and it's time to take a visit to the ISD Chimera.

ENTRY LOG 3

Nobody ever told me that the ISD Chimera, a ship that has one of the scariest Admirals to date, would be so… batshit insane. For starters, a captain or commander there, whose name is _____ _____ is just- how has she not gotten fired? I’m not sure myself, but from what I witnessed, she must have Admirals luck on her back because I’ve never seen someone act like that. She wasn’t rude, she wasn’t cocky (well, maybe a little), but she was… bold. She did what she wanted without a care in the world.

When I asked about her to the other crew members, they told me, “Oh, that’s just _____, she's always like that.” I have no idea how a woman could have this rank in a ISD and also be this chaotic. Not only that, but she's as old as me, and that means that she probably has connections- somewhere.

Another person of interest is a (again, forgot if he was a captain or commander) guy named Eli Vanto. He's not insane like his counterpart, but he's… strange. I saw him get his coffee from the coffee machine, down it, before making another cup. He had a water bottle with him the second day I was here, and it didn’t smell like coffee. Sometimes I’m glad that I’m not part of an ISD crew. 

And then, finally, Grand Admiral Thrawn himself. I only met him once, and that was a long lasting impression. He was speaking with another captain of a nearby ISD, and that captain was… I think Captain Ilian if I remember correctly. Anyway, he was way more cocky then ____, and he was saying something about moving ships to Coruscant without any explanation, and Grand Admiral Thrawn listened, but never spoke. When he asked if he was still there, he simply said, “Indeed. Continue.” He didn’t even falter. 

The captain eventually just dropped the whole thing. I never expected an alien from the unknown regions to be this far up the chain, but I’m starting to see what got him here.

And then Agent Kallus. Agent Kallus isn’t even going to be here for a while apparently, he's somewhere on Coruscant with another ISB member. Colonel Yularen, which is also surprising. I’ve heard of Yularen before, and he’s not someone to be messed with if I remember correctly. 

Oh, one more thing. When I told my “boss” (who has now asked to go by boss), he stood in silence and then asked if I was serious. When i presented my evidence, he started to believe me and told me to hold my position and wait for him to return, and then figure out where he was going. He was so serious. I mean, what is so special about this group? It’s almost like Vader's obsession with killing jedi. That captain or commander _____ was making that joke, by the way.

So, I guess that will have to be all. Goodbye.

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ok so Arus Dara is the son of a clone deserter who deserted early, like right after the geonosis incident. if you ask him he wont tell you why or how, simply stating that he doesn't like to talk about his father, which is understandable since he had to watch him die in front of him. his mother, a togruta, had to take care of him for the rest of his time with her. the reason why he needs money is because she has a disease that, while treatable, is extremely expensive. so he has to deal with that as well.

anyways the story is set more in the way of he speaks, and then what his datapad picks up will be put down so he can read them. its like a journal for himself. thats all for now, so ye. bye.

tagging: @danger-xylophones