#Exams is coming up and I'm leaving for a trip to relax before classes start again

[batolusa]

I don't think I ever shared the high Susan doodle or this Jophie. SO have them.

[thepreciouspoet]

the slap

Timeline: 2025 April 11th, Friday, late afternoon. Location: Her in-law's home in London. Mood: Happy, relaxed, focussed Attire: See this post. Nothing too fancy - but not an attire certain people might be happy about... With: Her university friends; Ayesha, Mark, and Liam

It was a pleasant afternoon at Zeynep's in-law's home. She and her friends, Ayesha, Mark, and Liam, had been at university for their classes since the early hours of the morning. They attended their lectures, gone to their classes, and had studied a little before grabbing a bite to eat. The university library had become like a second residence for the group, who had booked a study room every day to work on their assigned project - but with final exams coming up and more and more frazzled students desperately trying to get some last-minute studying in, the library had become too crowded. Getting their own study room was hard too, as they were constantly booked out. They decided they needed a more private location if they were going to work on their project.

Zeynep had offered her home. It was quiet and spacious, as well as close to the university, so travel wouldn't be a problem. Out of respect she had of course checked with her in-laws that it would be okay first, still somewhat a guest in their home despite the years she had been living there. They were happy with it, even telling Zeynep to let them know in advance when her friends would be over so that they could leave and give them privacy to work.

Currently, the four were finalising their project and adding in the finishing touches, well ahead of the due date next week. They were sitting on the carpeted floor of Zeynep's living room around the coffee table, focussed on their scribbled in textbooks and the presentation slides on their laptops. Zeynep had laid out a spread of snacks and had made Turkish coffee, contributing to her share of the project while laughing with her friends.

"Alright, we are done," Mark said happily, hitting the 'save' button on their shared presentation.

"Finally," Ayesha yawned, stretching her arms and letting out a happy sigh when the tension released from her back. "Now all we have to do is focus on exams."

"Argh, don't say that word," Liam groaned. "We just finished work and you want us to think about even more?"

Zeynep chuckled as she and her friends started packing away their things. "It's okay, we'll have semester break right after. Just a few more weeks of hard work, and then we can relax."

"That's right," Ayesha smiled. "And of course we'll get to meet up in the break, before Zeynep travels back to Turkiye."

"When are you going?" Mark asked, turning towards the girl.

"At the end of the month. I'm going to visit for my nephew's birthday, stay for about a week, and then come back." Zeynep told them. This had been the plan she had made with Nadim - she still had a year of studies to go and as per his wishes she'd be coming back to London and finishing them up. She still was unsure about what the future held after that.

"Sounds nice to see your family! I hope you have a good trip," Liam told her, getting up from the ground and grabbing his bag. "I've got to go. Football training. Anyone need a lift?"

The group chatted as they packed their items away, with Zeynep assuring her friends to leave all the dishes the way they were because she'd tidy up after. They thanked her for hosting them and started off towards the front door - Liam and Ayesha were a little ahead, bickering about the football teams they supported, while Mark and Zeynep followed behind, laughing quietly at their friend's never-ending rivalry.

"They should just date already," Mark whispered to Zeynep, whose lips curled into an amused smile.

"Give them time," Zeynep told him. The two were quite close, keeping their voices down so their friends didn't hear. "It'll happen naturally when the time is right."

"I suppose you're the expert since you're the only one of us in a relationship," Mark laughed. "How did it happen for you? You never told us."

Zeynep felt her heart clench. It was no secret to her friends that she was in a relationship, but she hadn't revealed the details about the nature of her marriage to them. They had always wanted to meet her "boyfriend", curious about him, asking to see photos - but she rarely shared anything with them other than his name and the fact that he was always "away" on business. "That's a story for another time," Zeynep told Mark, the smile on her face now slightly forced. "Promise."

"Ah, you always say that!" Mark joked as they exited the house, lightly bumping her arm. "So secretive! Is he a spy or something?"

"Hmm maybe," Zeynep teased back, letting him nudge her repeatedly until Liam called from up ahead.

"Hey Mark! We'll leave you behind if you're going to be that slow!"

"Coming!" Mark turned towards Zeynep, raising his hand to give the other a high-five. She smiled, returning the gesture, glad that Mark was respecting her boundaries of touching and hugging. "Thanks again for letting us come over! See you next week!"

"See you. Bye guys!" Zeynep waved to all of her friends, watching as they hopped into Liam's car. She turned, about to go up the steps back into her in-law's house, when someone shouted her name from the street.

"ZEYNEP!"

The girl's eyes widened. The voice Zeynep heard was not a happy one. it was one reminiscent of her childhood, filled with anger, that instantly filled her with a feeling she hadn't had in a long time - dread. Impending doom. When she expected that something unpleasant was about to happen, and there was nothing she could do to stop it.

Turning, Zeynep saw her parents storming down the street. A taxi had been parked at the kerb, but she hadn't thought much of it when saying goodbye to her friends, not expecting anyone to come over. She had no idea that inside the cab, her parents had been sitting there, having just arrived at the same moment Zeynep had been saying goodbye to her friends. As soon as Liam's car was gone, they exited, calling out to the girl who had had no idea that they were coming. Her parents had never visited her one since she arrived in London.

"Anne, Baba," Zeynep said with surprise, watching as her parents drew closer with unhappy looks over their faces. Why? What reason did they have to be so upset? This was the first time she had seen them in years, and even though they weren't very close shouldn't it be a happy family reunion-

SLAP!

Zeynep's head snapped to side when her father's hand collided hard with her cheek, making her cry out from the pain and stumble to the side, almost falling on the floor of the veranda. Tears instantly bloomed in her eyes from the contact, as her mother started shouting.

At her. Not at Zeynep's father, who had just laid a hand on her. She was shouting at Zeynep.

"What kind of wife are you!?" The woman screamed in Turkish, pointing at her daughter. "Wearing such revealing clothing and allowing strange men in your house you share with your husband and his family!"

"A-anne, no," Zeynep cried back, reaching up to cradle her stinging. "T-they're my friends, we were just studying! I promise!"

"Do you think we were born yesterday! You can study in a library, what was he doing in your home! Why do you let him touch you!? Does your husband know about this!?" Her father's booming voice caused Zeynep's heard to leap into her throat, her body trembling with fear from the accusations and the way his hand was reaching up for another hit.

"I never raised my daughters to be such sluts," Her mother lamented with a cry, holding the straps of her handbag and whacking Zeynep with it again and again. "Both of them! Both my daughters are sluts!"

"A-anne, baba, stop!" Zeynep pleaded.

"Get inside!" Her father shouted, grabbing Zeynep by the hair and shoving her into the doorway. She stumbled in, her parents following after her, where a whole other set of issues ensued. She had yet to tidy up the living room since her friends had only just left, so there were empty coffee glasses on the table and crumbs that needed to be swept up. Zeynep planned on cleaning straight after they left - but unfortunately, in her parent's eyes, this was just another example of how much of a failed daughter she was. They shouted at her again, her father lifting one of the glasses and throwing it onto the floor where it shattered into pieces at her feet, while her mother continued beating her with her handbag. The two ignored Zeynep's cries and pleas to stop, the shouting heard from outside by the concerned taxi driver and Nadim's family, who were arriving home...

[linseia]

Yes, I've been reading my old journals recently, going through my older posts, and letters I sent my friends when I was sad. Learning, relearning, analyzing my own behavior and reflecting has always been the toughest yet the most exciting phases of my life honestly, I'm embracing whatever life is giving me and seeing it as a learning opportunity to grow and show up as the highest version of myself.

Take cold showers, drink tea, watch informative YouTube videos, read, meet up with friends, FaceTime friends, keep up with extracurricular work, don't get unnecessarily stressed about the 'aesthetic' of your notes, reflect regularly, achieve constantly.

You have this one life. How do you wanna spend it? Apologizing? Regretting? Questioning? Hating yourself? Dieting? Running after people who don't see you? Be brave. Believe in yourself. Do what feels good. Take risks. You have this one life. Make yourself proud. 

Remember, inner peace begins the moment you take a deep breath and choose not to allow another person or event to control your thoughts. You are not what happened to you. You are what you choose, Let go, breathe, and begin again.  You're getting better. You're flourishing. You're leaving behind all that doesn't serve your highest good. You're getting rid of negative thought patterns, habits, and behaviors. Deep down you know you can do it. You know all the potential you have. Now is the time to step it up. You'll get to a point in your life when you realize it's been months, years, decades... and you forgot to live.

Life is not Instagram. Life is not Facebook. Life is not texting. Life is forgetting your phone at home, going on an adventure with people that mean the most to you, feeling, sensing, actually looking around at the world and its beauty instead of your screen, and coming home with a huge smile on your face and a story to tell. I'd challenge anyone to stop picking up his or her phone, stop walking around the city looking down at it and try to remember what you experienced when you were a child. The universe is so much more interesting than any Instagram or text will ever be.

Wake up early. Drink coffee. Work hard. Be ambitious. Keep your priorities straight, your mind right, and your head up. Do well, live well, and dress really well. Do what you love, love what you do. It is time to start living. write letters and notes to yourself make little promises to yourself.

A big part of being happy is being excited. be excited for everything - making a cup of tea, decorating your future apartment, seeing a friend again, falling in love unexpectedly, the next episode of a show you like, finishing something stressful, buying something you've been saving up for, a new album, sunsets, traveling, road trips, and the feeling of going to bed after a long day. think of something to be excited about and daydream about it often when you're sad.

Retype your class notes. Add in info from other sources. Make summary folders out of the info. Run through them, keep a tally. When studying for an exam, print out those typed notes and highlight and annotate the shit out of them to link everything and structure the notes properly. Rewrite this structured format. Use those summary foldable to memorize the content. Do your homework the day you get it. Pack your bag the night before no matter how tired you are. Honestly, you need to drag your ass out of bed at the time you told yourself you would wake up. Relax when you're commuting. Whether that means listening to music, reading, or even sleeping, please use that time to relax. If you want, you can create that day's to-do list to get yourself a little motivated for the afternoon ahead. Take structured cornel notes in class. When studying, use those corners to create fake tests. Take those fake tests, uncover the holes in your knowledge/argument. Fill those holes. Keep up with your drama logbook and homework. Learn how to research efficiently.

LET'S DO OUR BEST! WE GOT THIS! WE'VE DONE THIS BEFORE, WE CAN DO IT AGAIN!!

sometimes you fall down in life and it sucks!!!!!! like it’s actually terrible but… hey. u gotta get back up champ bc u r a STAR. in other words, i have fallen down recently and this is how i plan on getting back up. bc i am a star.

starting easy

clean your room bc outer peace brings inner peace

clean yourself bc outer peace brings inner peace and this means removing your makeup washing your face brushing your teeth combing your hair wearing nice-smelling clothes

drink a glass of water because hydration. important.

play a happy song like rlly whatever u want that makes u happy and want to dance

i know this might sound hard but like u got this i believe in u

moving on

ok this is hard part but u still got this love

think about everything that is wrong literally like EVERYTHING but maybe not everything bc maybe it will stress you out but maybe writing it will be cathartic whatever works for u

find solutions for those problems

i know i make it sound super easy and i know it’s actually really hard but usually u know what the solution is just something is holding u back

so rlly decide that that is the solution

tell urself, “this is how i am going to fix this”

to make this very hard and difficult step, please be nice to yourself by listening to cool tunes and rocking eyeliner

it rlly helps

organising your thoughts is also useful bc organisation

i have heard a bullet journal is rlly gr8 for this because like u get to plan ur days but also write random crap that’s not actually random crap but instead very good crap like “how to cheer up when sad” it’s all there in one notebook !!! radical eh

the step where you get back up

set urself up for success by sleeping early and waking up early bc sleep is like soooOo important u have no idea

exercise bc endorphins and all that good stuff and drink water and eat yo vegetables

do the shit that u planned to do in the previous step even if it’s hard i know it’s hard life is hard but u r hardier u r a star

stay on track

k so a lot of ppl r like “discipline > motivation” which i 100% agree but like motivation is also nice

have someone believe in u/someone u can talk to and be ur ray of sunshine like this is rlly helpful

find a purpose for whatever u want to do like what is ur reason for going through the shitty path of life and choosing this hard decision

typical motivational quotes like idk about u but i fall for those every single time

pep talk urself and fake enthusiasm even if u don’t want to like isn’t it radical how the only person holding u back is u

forgive yourself

ur life will go on track and then back off again!!! bc u r a human and humans make mistakes

don’t u get all mopey on urself and be like “i have ruined my life” like stop being so dramatic tough love ik but like U R ALIVE AND THAT MEANS U GTA KEEP KICKIN AT SMTHING

u can mope for a bit and when u do mope mope ur heart out like cry and use tissues and whatever u need but like limit ur moping period bc u need to move on

bad things will happen to u bc life and no matter how much ppl want to help u only u can rlly help urself

ur life ur decisions. forgive urself and start over again (refer to beginning of this post)

fun little reminders

u have the most beautiful smile

my inbox is always open if u need a pep talk and i will always fight ur negativity with my jaw-dropping, amazing, radiant positivity

u! r! a! star!!!!11!11!!1111!!!!!!!!3

cake makes everything better

leonardo dicaprio is still single

i love u unless ur mean don’t be mean plS

<3