#I think refusing to hate anything is just dishonest and enabling

[timreyals-blog]

Does Psychology Bring Happiness?

Does psychology bring me happiness? No, it doesn’t. While most other people try to buy their happiness, devote their lives to external (mystical) purposes or get involved in communities, or whatever else they do to achieve their sense of happiness, psychology can’t be taken away from me because it's in my head. This makes it stable.

Material possessions can be either lost or stolen-They therefore require security/protection (which causes both stress and additional costs-Unnecessary costs because security doesn't solve problems and protection is only ever necessary when a threat exists). External purposes can be proven false or to not exist, causing it to require willful ignorance and cognitive dissonance; Communities can easily shun people for whatever reason, because they’re irrational. Therefore, none of these are stable sources of happiness.

So, psychology is untouchable, yet, it doesn’t provide me happiness? That’s only because there are problems that can’t be solved because other people are refusing to make necessary social and economic changes, and no matter how loud I yell, or how many times I repeat myself-They still won’t budge. They will only resort to tactics or various fallacies in defense of their positions. I know to question people, but: 1. I'm the only one who does, and 2. They will only make excuses for themselves and walk away.

I am obligated to deal with problems caused by these people; Many don't even see them as problems.

What is happiness? There are a few components that I think happiness depends on: 1. Knowing who you are and being happy with it. This is the only possible happiness because only the person can lose self-esteem. This world being as hateful as it is, the skill to just either question or ignore insults [change if the insult is actually (unintentionally) accurate], is the security. 2. Having abundant access to life’s needs and indulging in the natural aspects of our being (relationships, education, experience, etc.).

Relationships are a grey area, for psychological reasons: Many adults are forced to either end a relationship or suffer it, because the partner is mentally ill. This means happiness can't exist within a relationship for many, because they're unable to find somebody who is rational; Somebody who is rational not under influence (their actual self). This doesn't mean relationships are not part of the equation of happiness, it only means human psychology prevents many from finding a healthy one.

If true love does exist, many people are indoctrinated, and are therefore not their true self; Which means such people would actually be somebody’s “soul mate”, but the indoctrination prevents such a relationship from either happening, or causes the relationship to break up.

I've heard that some people refuse to end the relationship for some reason, because their spouse is mentally ill and they either don’t want to be single or they got married and have kids. These people are only enabling their spouse, therefore, ending the relationship becomes their responsibility for this reason. If these people got married, well, the price they end up paying is the price for their error of getting married.

This world restricts and limits in the manner that we are all obligated to earn life’s needs. You’re criminal if you take without paying, you can only have what you can afford and you can’t have anything without money, or at least having worked for it. Relationships are no different, they can still exist, but, they aren't much fun without an income.

While psychology is how and why people think and behave, skilled people can help others achieve mental stability, if the problem is only an error in thinking. Psychology can’t be the source of happiness if they aren’t the ones who caused a particular problem and also can’t correct or change something to solve it-If they’re forced to deal with those problems while having no control over things.

Psychology needs to be in effect on a global scale, for it to enable and maintain a state of mental well being. It’s not about anybody in particular, but everybody. Jobs are the problem that I’m facing, something that holds me back from fully experiencing life without having one, the same goes with most other people. Ironically, having a job is also what holds most of us back from fully experiencing life. Jobs are therefore, a paradox.

To have a job is to sacrifice that percentage of the day, which can't be spent doing other things we want to do. To not have one, means to not have the money to do anything. This is the paradox.

I see employment as the problem, but most others don't, so, they think I have the problem and I'm the one who needs to change. Many others will complain, but, that's just a part of life to them.

In this world, with the social backwardness, which causes violence, hate, corruption, etc. a world of order, not balance, I need psychology for protection against all negatives-Those who are inept and seek to bring others down with them, or simply feel sorry for themselves but don’t seek self improvement. People who will only perpetuate the social decline, due to psychological weakness. Even positives-Those who are unrealistically optimistic about their own lives and future, while self-projecting their own views onto others.

These people preach their false contentment onto others. Completely and irresponsibly disregarding any issue(s) others are facing, telling them to cheer up, be happy and don’t worry, simply because they are happy. Or at least try to convince themselves and think they are. This world is not the way it is because people communicate and solve problems.

What I mean by “psychology against all negatives” is, I need to question everything and everybody who tries to bring me down or convince me to adhere to their antisocial and fascist worldview. I also need to understand why people have the mentalities they do. Many will give their side of the story about a problem in their lives, not realizing whomever they’re confiding in, doesn’t have everybody else’s side, so, they can’t know what’s actually going on-Many people are dishonest or are simply wrong.

I agree that worrying is useless because it doesn’t solve problems. However, I can look past that because other people cause many problems and believe in many falsehoods (jobs, the legal system, etc.) which everybody else is obligated to comply with and conform to, while nobody solves problems. They instead delegate such responsibilities onto other people and higher causes.

“It wasn’t meant to be”:

This is nonsense. If any opportunities are lost or relationships don't happen, it's because some obstacle prevented them. No greater cause is responsible, only conditions that we've created against ourselves and others, like jobs.

Given that the economy actually causes a strong interference with everybody’s life (I can’t say it dictates our life because people are able to interact), it does hold a lot back from people. People are denied relationships and opportunities because of financial complications, so, to tell anybody “it wasn’t meant to be.” when something either doesn’t happen or fails, is nonsense. The purpose of the economy is to produce for our own survival, not social management. The worship of money is a neurosis because it's purpose is only to purchase, it's never supposed to be valued over life.

Again, given that relationships are essentially maintained by money, maybe I don’t want one, maybe I'm wrong to want one (in economic terms, which is what relationships are actually based on). If I do ever meet somebody, great. If I never do, so be it. I was born into this monetary economy with no options [other than to starve (which others would fallaciously call an option) if I don’t want to work for a living], I can’t change it either, which means it’s a problem I didn’t cause, but, I also can’t solve.

I say that's fallacious because if nobody would ever choose to starve, they're only calling it an option to defend money/capitalism against others who challenge it.

Yes, relationships often end, and usually for the stupidest of reasons. Most relationships are marriages, which makes them difficult to end because certain third parties (divorce lawyers) have their hand in it. This unnecessarily adds hardship to the break-up process, which also intensifies the emotional aspect of it. Does this mean relationships are unstable? Not really. If adults were mature and responsible, they would discuss matters and be able to decide whether or not to end it, which would then be on good terms, if they do end it.

Confusing pleasure with happiness

I’ve already explained that material possessions are unstable because they can be either lost or stolen, they are also unstable because people tend to get bored with them, the pleasure isn’t always lifelong. That’s also it though, pleasure isn’t happiness, it’s sensual gratification. Happiness is mental well-being. Sex is the most pleasurable human experience known to us, and it’s completely natural. Sex isn’t happiness though, because that would mean people can never stop making love. The physical touch is obviously also pleasurable, not just the orgasm, but sex is only a factor, in the equation of a relationship. Relationships alone aren’t even a form of happiness, it’s only a factor of it.

The big picture:

I would say happiness consists of the true self, people who think for themselves because they agree with everything they do, for their own reasons and not what others have convinced them of. Possessing the critical thinking skills to debunk false information and bad opinions down. People who live how they want to, not try to fit in. Those who a psychologically strong enough to ignore peer pressure.

This doesn’t mean people are bad if they’re unable to. Many have the misfortunes of an insufficient upbringing (severe in many cases), which means their environment decides their fate. Many don’t have a chance, and they end up in the point of no return. Meaning, they’re mentally beyond any reasoning, so, it’s best to just wait until they’re gone.

This occurs because those who claim to be “skeptical freethinkers”, are anything but. Everybody who disagrees with anybody else-Who resorts to name calling, insults, ridicule and hate when those with bad ideologies ignore any kind of facts, are no better. Everybody should be questioning them instead. The solution really is the problem underneath.

I think many people are living the wrong idea of happiness-They've merely accepted the way the world is (the way things are), and are erroneously calling that happiness. It isn't so, because they're only accepting what little they have as they're being denied the rest in life.

[blackboard-monitor]

Drarry for all the ship questions (or those you want to answer to) Also your new blog background & header look nice! :D

thanks! i can always count on you to enable my shenanigans :D took out the ones i didn’t particularly wanna answer :)

who throws things in a fight?i mean, both of them, if their interactions in hogwarts are anything to go by :D

who goes to their parent’s house for a weekend when things get bad?well, Harry doesn’t have any parents and Draco can’t stand his for any extended period of time (personal headcanon), so there’s not much of a chance for that :D in my mind none of their fights last long enough anyway

who wants to have children? who doesn’t? if both do, how do their goals differentiate?both are hesitant about having kids because they don’t exactly have the best life experiences, and Draco especially doesn’t think he could be a good parent. but once their (Harry’s) friends start having kids they may revisit the subject. and there’s always Teddy Lupin to look after :D 

who is more adverse to physical contact?i feel like Draco is Super Paranoid™ about any public displays of affection whatsoever because What Will People Think??

who hates/dislikes their neighbors the most?Draco isn’t used to having neighbours, so everything they do is Super Annoying and Obnoxious in his opinion. he has an ongoing feud with the lady across the street because he doesn’t like the flowers in her garden. he claims it’s really because he heard her say something homophobic once but no one buys it

who hates/dislikes their significant other’s family?let’s be honest, Harry hates Lucius and at best has mixed feelings about Narcissa. Draco doesn’t blame him

who is most likely to leave when things get rough?Harry will storm out and/or go hang out with Hermione and Ron for a while, but he’s never gone longer than a couple of hours. Draco will just lock himself in a room and refuse to communicate.

who thinks their partner turned out a different person than they thought?they both do. Draco discovers that Saint Potter has weaknesses, fears and insecurities, and Harry realises that Draco’s tendency to be cocky and nasty doesn’t stem from cruelty, but from desperately trying to hide the fact that he doesn’t think he’s good enough

who hates/dislikes their significant other’s friends?Draco doesn’t have a lot of friends going into the relationship, because all his friends were kids of Death Eaters. he learns to get along with Harry’s friends, but he doesn’t particularly like all of them

who wants to go to social gatherings the most?Harry drags Draco to parties and get-togethers with his many friends, while Draco forces Harry to go to fancy Ministry balls and banquets that he inevitably gets invited to

who is most likely to be dishonest?Harry ‘Roonil Wazlib is my nickname’ Potter is a shit liar, so he rarely even tries. Draco, on the other hand, is full of secrets, mostly because he hates to show weakness or vulnerability

who is more emotionally closed off and how does this affect their partner?they both tend to pretend everything is fine when it’s not and to downplay their problems, which are manyfold after everything they went through in the war. they get pretty good at calling out each other’s bullshit, though

who is the dessert person?“Draco, i’m an adult, i can have ice cream for dinner if i want to”Draco rolls his eyes but lets Harry do it anyway, because he knows that Harry certainly didn’t get enough ice cream as a kid

who is more conservative?Draco, obviously. although he’s renounced anything deatheater-y, he still worries a lot about what’s Proper™. Harry couldn’t be conservative if he wanted to, because he didn’t grow up in the wizarding world and certainly not in the Old Money part of it like Draco did

that was fun, thanks :D