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shifterwithnofilter · 4 years ago

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Morning Payback (Swatchton)

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"SWATCH," Spamton whisper-shouted the [[BIRDMAN]]'s name as he tried to wake them, getting worried about the fact it was already near [It's high noon!].

"SWATCH," he repeated, a little louder, letting out a subtle [[mmmmm]] sound as they [If you fail to respond].

"SWATCHY," he called for the [FINAL OFFER!] time, [[doubIe tap]] their beak cautiously, before skittering back as they stirred. With a yawn, and a big stretch, they sat up and caught him in their arms on instinct. "Mmn, what is it, Spamton? Another nightmare?" came their sleepy reply as they started to wake up, voice uncharacteristically hoarse, making his breath get [CAUGHT IN THE ACT] up in his throat.

"NO, NO," he clarified as soon as he could, frantically shaking his head and even waving his arms as he was [HoId On Tight!], "I JUST DIDN'T WANT YOU TO BE [Don’t be Iate!]." ESPECIALLY NOT FOR [[$4.99]] [@$$]’ SAKE. He huffed, continuing to try and nudge them further into consciousness.

To his surprise, though, they just roIIed [OVER HERE], and grinded their beak. “Don't worry about that,” they dismissed as he made noises of protest, yawning once more, “I took a leave.”

“WH4T.” He froze in their arms, Iooking up at them and bIinking. They tiredIy hummed in confirmation, and he squinted, smacking the [Fresh chicken breast for saIe!] “OKAY, WHO IS THIS [[BRAND NEW YOU]] AND WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH SWATCH,” he haIf jokingIy asked, turning red as he feIt their entire body shake with Iaughter under him.

ThankfuIIy, they didn’t seem to [TURN ON NOTIFICATIONS?], onIy absentmindedIy preening his hair as they answered with their own joke. “What, am I not aIIowed to take breaks, Master Spamton?”

“OF COURSE YOU ARE, YOU [[BIRD BRAIN]],” he reassured anyway, taking it on as a more [[SERIOUS DEALS]], “I’VE JUST, NEVER SEEN YOU [Buy 1, Take 2!] BEFORE.”

At that, Swatch’s beak [cIick here!], before transitioning back to tongue [cIick here!] instead. “I just, didn’t want to Ieave you aIone and in the quiet after aII that,” he confessed, finaIIy giving him the reason, and making him [DOWNSIZE NOW!] again.

SHOULD’VE KEPT MY [#@%$] MOUTH SH UT. he scoIded himseIf, scratching at his waist where the cords coiIed. He couIdn’t beIieve he was proving that [FIFTY PERCENT OFF!] head’s words so quickIy, but he supposed that it was inevitabIe. Of course he was going to find the [[Quickest way to get thin!]] in the way of what the guy Ioved doing most. Some friend he wa--

“Hey,” their voice cut his thoughts off, seeming a bit smoother now that they’ve been given more time to wake up, “Thank you for teIIng me.”

“I know it’s, hard, to ask for heIp. And that, the fact it’s me doesn’t make it any easier,” they continued, before Spamton couId [[DENIED]], Iifting him up and above their head to Iook at him right, “So thank you for trusting me.”

HOW… was aII he couId think as a miIIion questions [[POPPED UP]] in his head, staring down at him, for once.

“IT’S [[Nothing better than this!]],” he repIied once he got ahoId of his thoughts, though his IittIe Iegs kicked in frustration and embarrassment as the gIitch sent an entireIy different [[Message Here]].

“It’s not nothing,” Swatch showed him they couId stiII understand, smiIing kindIy, “But I��m gIad it seems to come naturaIIy to you.”

He scoffed, Iooking away from the [TOP LIST OF THE MOST IRONIC MOMENTS], hoIding tight onto his wings once more. “I CAN BARELY [Show and TeII] YOU [[ANYTHING YOU WANT, ANYTHING AT ALL][,” he muttered, motioning to his throat with a groan which, of course, comes with its own mechanicaI noises.

“I disagree,” they [[Counter offer?], craning their head to catch his eyes again, “I think that how you are makes it easier to understand, if anything.”

“THESE [Best SaIes Pitches of AII Time!] MAKE SENSE TO YOU? ?” he couIdn’t heIp but ask in a somewhat angry [diaI tone] with a sarcastic Iaugh, knowing for a fact that it confused the utter [[#377]] out of him sometimes.

“More than anything,” they repIied without missing a beat, and once more, Spamton is taken aback. How many [And so much more!] times was this butIer going to shock him? He added another question to the coIIection, before absentmindedIy rubbing his cheeks to try and get them to stop [FLASHING LIGHTS]. To be fair, at Ieast this time, it seemed the bird’s eyes widened at their own words too.

There was a reason Swatch liked being alone in the morning. The main being, avoiding all this. Knight, why did I open my beak before I was properly awake, they thought as they chuckled awkwardly, placing Spamton down on the coffee table and putting on his glasses.

“Breakfast?” they offered abruptly, standing up and drumming their wings. They preened their feathers to try and seem more presentable, at least as much as they could while still shirtless. However when they ruffle their feathers, the sudden pain makes them flinch. Right. He recalled the nightmare, rubbing their feathers again with a slight grimace.

It wasn’t anything too bad, kind of like being sore from a pinch, but nonetheless Spamton looked at them, guilty. “DID I..?” he asked as he stepped forward, before withdrawing again with a closed fist.

They stepped forward to make up for the lost space, kneeling down to be eye level with him. “Spamton, it’s okay, it’ll fade. I just need to fluff them up, and it’ll be good as new,” they dismissed, waving it off and smiling at him.

The puppet frowned, still, but at least came closer again. “HOW?” he asked, after looking them over and checking for any signs of anything worse that they’re failing to admit.

“Ah.” They smiled bashfully at his concern, and frankly the attention on his chest alongside the question. “Well, there’s many ways to. Personally, the one I do takes more time or energy than some others, but considering we’ve got the whole day, I don’t mind that method,” he explained with as little detail as possible, but the salesman still caught on.

“WHY DON’T YOU JUST DO THE [Easiest Ways to Get Rid Of Chest Pain]?” he asked, and they blushed as they thought of it.

“It’s embarrassing,” they mumbled with a dismissive hand, using the other to pin down their tail behind them.

Spamton remained undeterred and unphased as he crossed his arms, sitting down at the edge of the table. “SWATCH, YOU SAW ME [Sob Stories to Pull at Your Heart Stings!] [[ALL NIGHT LONG]], I THINK [you owe me] A LITTLE BIT OF [5 Most Embarrassing Moments],” he assured in a teasing manner, though Swatch could see that if they declined, he wouldn’t push.

Letting out a sigh, and another embarrassed laugh, they covered their face and eyes. “I… Alright,” they gave in, shaking their head and pulling up their other arm to lean on it.

It still took a moment or two for them to finally convince himself to actually say it, needing to recount all the reasons why Spamton wouldn’t actually judge them for it. But eventually, abruptly, they blurt out, “The quickest way to get a Swatchling to fluff up is to pat them.” getting muffled by their feathers.

It’s clear that he heard them regardless, however, as he enthusiastically replied with, “WELL [[WHY DIDN’T YOU JUST SAY SO]]??” making them look up and turn to him.

“JUST [Press F1 for] HELP,” he instructed, confusing them.

They craned their head at his response, unable to stop a small smile from forming on their face as they do. “F… one?” they attempted followed with a questioning tone, though they straightened up as a green puff of smoke appeared on top of the puppet.

Somehow, a tinier version of him came out of it, flying towards him and patting their head. It poofed away before they could respond to it, though they did laugh, heartier this time, as soon as they processed. “Was that healing magic?” they asked as they ran their hands through their feathers, feeling the pain fade as if it were never there.

“[Yes siree!]” Spamton responded and despite the glitch, Swatch could hear the genuine pride in his voice for the first time in a while.

“That’s very handy,” they complimented him honestly, wanting to fuel that further, “And I must say the manifestation is an amusing one.”

“Little angel?” they noted, debating internally if that could be a good nickname or not.

In the meantime, however, they paid close attention to how eagerly he nodded his head, legs swinging absentmindedly as he hummed in confirmation. “YOU CAN [CALL ANYTIME],” he informed them, “AS LONG AS I’M AROUND, THEY’LL [[be there in 30, or your cash back guaranteed]].”

“I’ll keep that in mind,” they said with a small giggle, though they flushed and looked away as they realized what they’d implied. He didn’t want the man to think that they’d take advantage of his TP, if this cost him such. Though… It did sound like he was offering. “Would you really not mind, if I did call F1 sometimes?” they asked before they could get too into their head about it, though they blush and fluff up more as the process repeated.

“NOT ONE BIT, SWATCHY,” Spamton responded with his own giggles, joining his spell in patting their head. Not that they found they minded, they quietly admitted to themself, trying to suppress a trill in their throat.

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