#THIS COUNTS FOR LUSTY MONTH OF MAY

[liminalpsych]

A very, very roughly sketched, unedited scene that wouldn't leave me alone this morning and demanded to be written (....oh hey @queer-ragnelle! I accidentally made a Lusty Month of May / May Day Parade contribution!):

The week they arrive at Sorelois. Perhaps even the day. Guinevere is half-mad with rage and grief, reeling from Arthur's betrayal, the loss of her marriage, of her court. It's the usurping of her entire life.

It makes her bold. It makes her want to be cruel. It makes her want to strike back or to take what she wants or to rebel in some small or large way. It makes her want to hurt Arthur in turn, or transgress since she has already been spurned from society and convicted for something for which she's innocent.

"There is something I wish to see," Guinevere says, there in the somber quiet of the receiving room with Lancelot, Galehaut, and Lady Bloie of Malehaut. An announcement to the air, undirected.

Lancelot responds first, of course, as expected. He kneels before her, the picture of earnest devotion. "Whatever you wish, my queen, I will strive my utmost to bring it to you."

Across the room, towering nigh to the ceiling even leaned against the wall as he is, Galehaut watches her with a carefully neutral expression. Unblinking, unsmiling, and there's the barest tightening around his eyes. He is wary of her still, and senses her mood.

The Lady of Malehaut is a different kind of unreadable entirely, lounging next to her with a spot of embroidery to keep her clever hands busy. Her full mouth is always a breath away from smiling, like she carries with her a trove of private amusements at all times. She observes from beneath half-lidded eyes, her needle flashing through cloth more by touch than sight.

Guinevere lifts her loyal knight's chin with a touch of her finger. His lips part, eyes wide and wondering. She smiles. "I want to you to give Galehaut a kiss."

Ah, if only she dared to watch Galehaut's expression in that moment! Yet she must keep her focus on Lancelot. His face pales. His breath catches in his throat. His pulse thrums against her finger like a trapped and frantic bird. "M-my queen?" he stammers, gaze darting side to side as if for an escape.

Her smile sharpens, serpentine. "Do you not wish to?"

"I— I am not—" He's breathing rapid and shallow now, on the edge of panic. It's a pretty quandary she's put him in, one with no known safe answer, and he's reeling under it.

(She feels more steady by the moment, her control re-establishing in the small sphere she still possesses.)

Galehaut steps forward. There's the edge of fury in his warning, in the creak of leather and the rattle of maille. "My lady," he rumbles.

Now Guinevere looks his way, and she lifts a graceful eyebrow at the storm in his countenance. Lancelot quivers beneath her touch, unmoored by the loss of her pinning gaze. "Will you tell me truly that you don't want this, Galehaut?"

He halts. His jaw works; the stormclouds thicken. He glares, proud and silent.

Guinevere laughs. It's a free, bell-like sound—as playful as a day a-Maying. Lancelot stills and his breathing steadies, soothed by her apparent merriment. She makes a show of taking pity on him, releasing his chin to stroke his cheek. "Do you wish to kiss me?" she murmurs, leaning closer.

His breath catches again, no different than before. He nods.

She kisses him, sweet and soft; he returns it with a small desperate sound against her lips. (It tastes like power.) He's breathless when she pulls away, and she smiles down at him, indulgent. "I know Galehaut desires a kiss from you as well," she says, "and he is the one who brought us together, yes?"

Another nod, and Lancelot seems more dazed than panicked now. Swaying towards her, and glancing shyly towards his boon companion, who draws a sharp bracing breath.

"It is not as if he's a lady," she says with a wink. "So it is not being untrue to me. And it is my request, is it not?"

"Y—yes, my lady...?"

"Do you not want to kiss him?"

"I..." Those expressive eyes flicker from her lips to Galehaut's and back again. His breath quickens again, but this time it is a little less panicked. "My lady, you ask hard questions," he says at last, helplessly.

She laughs again, darkened with satisfaction. "Kiss him, then," she commands, "and then tell me if you want to do it again."

"My lady," protests Galehaut, strained—oh, and there is longing so sharp that it is agonized, bare and naked in every rigid muscle and the aching furrow of his brow. He looks at Lancelot like a man starving. He looks at Guinevere like a man betrayed.

To give Galehaut what he so desperately desires, when he knows it is something she can take away at any moment? To receive a kiss from his Lancelot, but only on the order of Lancelot's lover-queen? For Galehaut to touch his companion in the way he desires, but only so long as Guinevere allows it, never knowing truly if Lancelot would have initiated on his own, never being certain of Lancelot's desire?

It's a power like none she's ever wielded before.

Lancelot stumbles to Galehaut on unsteady legs with a last hesitant glance over his shoulder. Guinevere smiles encouragingly and nods her approval. One last nudge—and still, Galehaut could refuse Lancelot. Galehaut is sworn to neither Guinevere nor Arthur; he needs not obey her. Galehaut could save the last unconquered edges of his heart and maintain this last barrier of distance. He could still refuse himself what he wants so badly.

Galehaut tenses, and Galehaut wavers, and Galehaut's heaves great draughts of air as if he's in the thick of a melee.

Lancelot reaches out, and Galehaut surrenders.

[monzabee]

the lusty month of may – cs55 (+18)

masterlist

Summary: The one where it’s that darling month when everyone throws self-control away, and you and Carlos decide to do a wretched thing – or two. 

Pairing: carlos sainz x reader

Word Count: 1.4k

Warnings: smut, unprotected sex (cover your willy, don’t be silly), pre-established relationship, cursing, google translate spanish bc i forgot all the spanish i learned in school (lo siento mucho, señora xenia), talks about pregnancy, minors dni!!

Author’s Note: hi, hey, hello!! okay so this was not supposed to take me this long to write, but i kind of procrastinated because of studying and my exams, but here it is, finally done! i fully blame carlos for my brain rot, so i hope you guys enjoy this one, and feedback is always appreciated! (p.s. the title comes from a song from the broadway musical ‘camelot’ for those of you who are interested!) good morning, noon or night wherever you are, xoxobee

Please also note that all of my works are protected under copyright, and not available for reposting on other platforms. 

His hand is closed over your mouth in a feasible attempt to cover up any pleas or sounds coming from your lips. You tried telling him no when he started pulling you towards the greenhouse behind the villa his family rented out for the weekend. It was supposed to help Carlos destress before leaving for Miami for the rest of the triple header, a long weekend, “A quick little getaway,” his mother called it. Carlos lets out some built-up steam, alright, by fucking you every chance he gets over the course of the 4-day vacation. 

“You know what it does to me when you wear this dress, amorita,” Carlos’ breath hits your sweaty skin as he runs his nose down the length of your throat, “maybe I should rip it when I’m done with you, hm? De esa manera no puedes tentarme más.” That way you can't tease me anymore. You try shaking your head as a response which elicits a mocking chuckle from him, the way he bucks his hip driving him further deep inside you. The strangled moan that rips from the back of your throat has you throwing your head back, which causes Carlos to quickly, but gently, tug on your chin to make you look back up at him. “Eyes on me, cariño.” 

His hips continue their rushed movements as he keeps his eyes locked to yours, your lips opening in an attempt to make him see reason. “Carlos, they’ll hear us.” You think he’ll ignore you once again, like he did when he was frantically pulling you away from the pathway which leads to the courtyard both of you were supposed to be making your way over for dinner with his parents. 

With one last thrust of his lips, which pulls yet another moan from your lips. “I won’t let anyone see you like this; you know that don’t you?” His tone is sweet despite the way he’s breathing deeply in an attempt to organise his breathing, the way he uses the tip of his pointer finger to caress down your blushed cheek, sending shivers down your spine. Although you manage to nod your head, there is a small smile on his lips as he reminds you, “Words, amorita.”

“I- I know that,” you breathe out a ragged breath, hand gripping Carlos’ shirt tighter in the process, “you’re far too jealous to let anyone see.” 

“Always such wits, amor,” he drags the tip of his finger towards your lips, “maybe I’ll just have to fuck you harder to remind you how much you love my possessive side.” 

“You are insane,” you pant, letting out another moan when he shifts his hips to continue his movements even deeper, “is that why you pulled me here? To fuck me into the wall because you were jealous?” 

His voice is hoarse against your skin as he drags his hand down your face to your neck towards your chest to grope your breast. “I made you a promise, remember?” 

And you do. You remember the hushes whispers and promises shared before the New Year’s, and the sweet kiss you’ve shared afterwards. Your eyes soften as realisation sinks in, his determined gaze on yours suddenly making more sense. His hand is rough as he kneads the skin of your breast, his fingers quickly find your pebbled nipple, which has you whining. “I do- I do remember.” You manage to get out as you do your best to focus on his command from earlier. 

“Good, so be a good girl for me and hang on tight, hm?” He gives you enough time for you to organise yourself; your hands grab the flower arranging table underneath you firmly and it makes you receive a pleased hum from him as he keeps up the movement of his hips whilst also making you wrap your legs around him, a hand firmly placed on your upper thigh. “Eyes on me, cariño.” He reminds you.

You comply, of course, and his thrusts keep getting deeper and deeper every time his hips finds yours because of the new position. There is nothing innocent about the way the sounds of your skin slapping off of each other echo in the stuffy greenhouse, mixed with your moans calling out his name over and over again. He knows you well enough to know your tells when you’re getting closer, and he knows your body well enough to know that you won’t be able to hang on for too long. 

The way you scream out Carlos’ name when you feel his fingers drawing circles on your clit is nothing short of animalistic, the way he whispers praises to your lips is lost to you as you feel yourself getting closer to your release. “Carlos,” his name leaves your mouth in a desperate moan, followed by a softer and more pleading, “Carlos, please.” 

“Ask me nicely, amor.” His smile is almost devilish as he mumbles the words to your lips, his fingers slowing down their movements until you give him what he wants. His free hand tighten around your upper thigh in warning as he adds, “No continuaré si no lo pides amablemente.” I won't continue if you don't ask nicely.

You bite back a snarky comment, hyperaware of the fact that he is a man of his word and will leave you unsatisfied on the table by yourself if you don’t give him what he wants. “Por favor déjame correrme.” Please let me cum. The next moan that comes out of your lips come off more as a broken sob as he resumes his fingers’ movement on your bundle of nerves and his hips speeding up their movements to get you there, and you can’t help but chant “Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.”

The continuous moans that keep coming out of your mouth, in which you are begging him to make you cum causes his hips to continue their movement rather sharply. Your eyes are filled with tears of pleasure as your visions gets blurry, but you make a point to maintain eye contact with Carlos while he guides you through your orgasm. He only lets himself come undone once you’re done, but unintentionally clench around him due to still feeling sensitive. Hearing your name come through his lips in a guttural moan causes you attempt to bring him closer by tightening your legs around him. 

After a few moments of calmness, you whine at the loss of contact as Carlos pulls out slowly, careful enough to not hurt you. Just as he begins tucking himself back to his pants you attempt to fix your own clothing, but he’s quick to stop you as he says, “Stay on the table, cariño.” 

You choose to nod, not trusting your voice. He’s gentle with you as he pulls up your underwear up your legs and fixes the top and the skirt of your dress. You watch him with sleepy eyes as you ask, “Do you think it took this time?”

“We’ll have to wait and see,” he smiles softly at you while getting some of your tangled hair out of your face, “do you think it did?”

“I don’t know,” you mumble, suddenly shy in front of him for no reason – but he is quick to divert the situation by cutting your feet off the ground by carrying you bridal style, which has you squealing as you wrap your arms around his neck, “Carlos!”

 He lets out a laugh a laugh as he walks out of the greenhouse and the colder air outside has you snuggling closer to his body for heat. His voice is light as he mumbles, “Well, this brings back memories.” 

“You say as if our wedding was a decade ago.” You complain, scrunching up your nose in disagreement. You let a confused hum when he starts walking back to the villa. “We’re supposed to–”

“I’ll tell my parents you were feeling ill,” he raises an eyebrow, “unless you want to sit with them for the rest of the night with my cum still–”

“Carlos!” You exclaim, making him quickly drop the rest of the sentence as he stars laughing. “This is not funny, you know.” 

“Oh it is plenty funny, cariño.” Carlos objects, “We can always tell my parents we were trying for a baby.” He is quick to add, “Not, the literal way, loca,” after receiving a bewildered look from you. 

You sigh as you shrug, “I mean, we could.” 

He agrees with a hum, “We’ll talk about it later, now go to sleep, I know you will before I make it back to the room anyway.”

“Mhm, you know me too well.” You mumble as you bury your face into his neck. 

“That I do, cariño.” He mumbles as he presses a gentle kiss to your hair “That I do.”

[don-forever]

Semen Retention Guide

How to quit porn

Written 2022 - 2023

Below is a guide to help you better understand your addiction and help you quit porn for good.

Find Peace. †

-------------------------------------------------

Pre

*Nothing is scientifically proven and is just my experience

*Document subject to change

*I kept track of every relapse for about 6 months to gain data, and recorded my mindset during the first few weeks of retention to better understand addiction and what causes relapses.

How to Start

Planning ahead (in my experience) is more effective than starting immediately. I find that planning ahead gives you time to come to terms with the End. Plan retention 1 week ahead for best results.

Tip: If you keep planning ahead then delaying it saying "I'll do it next week" then it means you dont WANT to get better. Dont lie to yourself. Make your decision certain.

Triggers

Instagram and Other Social Medias (uninstall)

Uninstall instagram for good.

Dont install instagram to text women. It leads to overall desire, which leads to porn use when these desires aren't met.

Uninstall all social medias. The internet has become lusty.

Mindless Socialization

Mindless communication is the act of texting people with the sole purpose of avoiding solitude. Before texting, ask yourself what are you trying to gain from the person you are talking to. Mindlessly texting random people you are attracted to will not fill your void. It will only make you horny which will cause you to masturbate OR will lead to sex, which will turn your porn addiction into a sex addiction (which is way worse). Once the sex stops the porn addiction will return.

Socializing should be pure. In person. Authentic. One must be comfortable and in love with themselves before searching for love outwardly. Socialization should be healthy and not be centered around sex. Socialization should not be used to fill a void.

Some women will not have your best interest in mind and talk about sex even though you are on retention. Beware of this.

To insure your intentions are pure it is best to wait at least a month before texting women to avoid relapse from lust, rejection, or unmet expectations. Or only limit socializations to in person communications.

Explicit Content (stay off explicit sites)

Avoid / Remove anything that can lead to relapse.

Lack of Sleep / Energy

Willpower is exhaustible. Strength is exhaustible. Sleep early / Eat healthy to get the energy needed to withstand the battle.

Most of my relapses occurred 2am - 5am. I should have been sleep.

Boredom (preoccupy self)

When there is too much time on your hands, there is nothing stopping you from masturbating. Exercise, Take walks, Sit with family, Etc. To preoccupy self. Create a healthier routine.

Days where you know you will have a lot of free time, create a schedule or have plans set aside. The less you plan ahead the more likely you will have free time on your hands. The more free time, the bigger the urge to masturbate.

Tip: Plan some things in public. It gets you out the house and out your head. It gives you a sense of what life really is.

First 4 weeks are hardest (in my experience).

Meditate more frequently and pray more frequently. Take walks more often. Be in public more. Sleep earlier. Cold showers. Hobbies. Fight through.

Lustful thought

Lustful thoughts are like seeds.

If you look at one person lustfully, it may not do much. But, as time goes on and you get more horny, that seed will grow into something much more. The more seeds you plant the less likely you are to win.

Keep your mind away from lust or you risk having those same lustful thoughts reemerge in the future when you lack the willpower to overcome them.

Do not think lustfully at all.

A crack in the dam will cause the water to spill in due time.

Keep your mind seedless.

Keep your dam without cracks.

Wet Dreams

Wet dreams do not count as a relapse. Days after wet dreams (in my experience) are some of the best days. In my research I've found that I was most social after a wet dream. I felt a renewal. This may not be true to all people and the renewal may not come after every wet dream.

Side note: When horny do not try to force a wet dream. Do not look at lusty things before bed. It will not lead to a wet dream. It will only plant seeds. Horniness doesn't increase chances of wet dreams. Wet dreams occur on a biological clock (Mine are about once a month). Horniness caused by trying to force a wet dream will only plant seeds. Too many seeds and you will be plagued with horniness and your chances of success when plagued are near 0.

-----------------------------------

EVERY TIME I relapse I write down the specific reason so I can know what my triggers and weaknesses are. I write down my emotions before relapse to better understand what thoughts lead me to relapsing. I also write down the time i relapsed to better understand when I'm more susceptible to failure. I recommend you do the same. It's very helpful.

Sudden Spike

A sudden spike is a random surge of horniness.

Upon these spikes, one must immediately release them in a healthy way.

(Cold shower, Taking a walk, pushups, etc.)

The bible says: "Run from temptation" So upon being tempted, get rid of it immediately.

I found that these spikes only last 10 minutes or less, so stay mindful of that before you do anything drastic.

I also found that

1) constant and consistent exercise, meditation, etc may reduce the intensity of spikes one will have. (Due to the energy that leads horniness being used before it reaches high levels.)

2) the less amount of lustful seeds planted, the less spikes one will have.

Less seeds planted = Less spikes

More exercise = Weaker spikes

Overcome Darkness

Anger, Sadness, Fear, Loneliness, Stress, etc.

Along with sudden spikes you may feel long lasting changes in mood or may be more sensitive to the problems in your life. This is good because one must feel to heal.

These inner demons are a main cause to addictions due to our need to escape pain. I have gotten in arguments and then later that day watched porn. Our mood definitely effects our urge for relapse.

This is very important.

Your mood CAN CAUSE your horniness. If someone irritates you that day it is best to take precautions BEFORE HAND. If you are stressed, upset, angry, etc. it is best to take precautions BEFORE HAND.

You more than likely WILL get horny soon.

Heal.

Incorporate shadow:

Withdrawal causes negative emotions to occur because they can no longer be suppressed by porn use. When these emotions occur you are more likely to relapse shortly after, if you do not pay attention.

Listen to these emotions instead of running from them. Incorporate them into your being.

Fill the void.

Loneliness:

Avoid socializing aimlessly. Horniness leads to loneliness which leads to desire which leads to relapse when desires aren't met.

Find peace in solitude and in the now.

If you do socialize, it should be in person. Face to face. Learn how to be confident. Learn how to be a functioning member of society. Socialize without lust or expectation of something more. Do not use tinder. Do not use social media. In person socialization only.

Reprogram your mind to real life.

Anger / Resentment:

Speak your truth. Leave once truth is spoken. Do not be afraid. Do not be discouraged. God is with you.

Meditate.

Release expectations.

Heal.

Sadness / Anxiety:

Ask the self "why?". Listen and you will hear the answer.

Last Resort

Before last resort you will be given a choice.

Do not lie to yourself when that time comes.

Masturbate with no porn. (Plan B)

Dont masturbate at all, but IF YOU DO, then do it WITHOUT PORN. Porn is a separate addiction from masturbation, so even if masturbation relapse occurs, a porn relapse doesn't have to happen too.

Porn badly damages the brain and causes addiction to worsen. Porn must include masturbation habit,But masturbation habit doesn't have to include porn.

Still, do not masturbate at all! This Plan B is a very last resort, only to be used by people who dont want to be on retention anymore. You should remain on Plan A if you want more for yourself.

Upon Relapse

After relapse (no porn) reset streak back to 0 and go on another streak.

Do not masturbate again or you will fall back into a habit and eventually start using porn again.

Plan A

Do not relapse regardless of Plan B.

Do not let the plan B give you a reason to give up on plan A. Do everything in your power to not relapse at all.

I feared putting the Plan B in this document at all because some people will grow soft and say to themselves "I'll do the Plan B because i cant make it through A." Those who rely on the Plan B should beware that Plan B may NOT even work. If you are not deep enough / disciplined enough in retention, Plan B will cause you to want to watch porn again in due time.

It is a slippery slope. Once you lost your Plan A streak you WILL LIKELY watch porn again soon because the incentive to keep going is close to zero. A plan B ejaculation has caused me to eventually watch porn because while masturbating i couldn't help but think about porn.

While one half of me believes masturbating with no porn can be a viable strategy, I also believe it is a terrible strategy for an addict. Its comparable to telling a raging alcoholic who is on rehab to drink a beer. Soon that beer will turn into two and those two beers will turn into whiskey again.

So please dont use plan B if you wish to better yourself. Plan B has failed me multiple times.

Stick to plan A with 100% certainty.

Tips

View horniness as a good thing. Something to be proud of. Something to be held on to. View horniness as VITALITY.

Retention with friends can help or hurt you. Their strengths may become your strengths, but their failures may lead to your failures. Choose wisely.

Don't forget your truth. You will lie to yourself sooner or later. Who will win? Who is stronger?

You may experience vivid dreams.

In ancient alchemy, the philosopher's stone is believed to be a substance that can turn lead into gold and turn humans immortal. This immortality, however, was not the end goal, but a necessary step to achieve what comes next. In the same way, semen retention is not the end. It is a means to it. If you treat semen retention as the end goal you will feel your "benefits" leave if you relapse. Use semen retention as a tool to achieve a greater purpose, not as the purpose itself.

When the body begins to fail get it back in order. The mind is harder to fix than the body so do not let the wreckage spread. If your mind fails and you are confused, keep faith. The spirit is harder to fix than the mind. Do not lose your spirit if you lose your mind.

When I quit porn I had no end goal. No set time. I just said "I'm done." If I said "I'll just go one month", then I would relapse eventually because my heart wasn't 100% dedicated to quitting my addiction. You must be ready to 100% give it all up. FOR GOOD. Until then you will constantly fail. Think about all the negatives. Think about what your life has come to. Think about how much worse it would be if you never quit this habit. Think about how great you will be if you quit. Its all or nothing. Small goals will yield smaller results.

The Key

Christ is the only way out of the darkness. Porn addiction is a demonic attack that makes you susceptible to more demonic attacks. The ONLY way to ward off such demons is through a relationship with Christ. Read the bible. Put on your SPIRITUAL armor. It is impossible to quit porn through your power alone. The spirit of God is needed to ward off all spiritual forces.

"For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand."

- Ephesians 6:12-13

Jesus loves you more than you can ever imagine. No matter how dark your life may feel, and no matter how deep you are in addiction, He loves you regardless. When society rejects you, remember that you are enough for him. He is by your side, and He always will be.

Final

Once the first wall of your defense is broken the rest will break in just a matter of time.

Do not allow seeds of doubt or negativity to seep in. Do not allow your thoughts to stray from the path. Do not question your journey.

Willpower is exhaustible. Without aim, willpower will fail. So, without a REASON to remain strong, the first wall will break. Do not allow your first wall to be broken. Have aim. Have a reason to stay strong. A reason to not fold. Have Something / Someone to fight for. Something to fight towards.

Reach the peak of your existence.

It is your purpose.

Reach for more.

God bless.

Forever.

End.

[thepinkwriterr]

Capricorn Season Chapter Eighteen Part Three

This chapter is just more letters! These are between Lorelei and Juniper. This one is short and bittersweet. Enjoy. 

Table of Contents 

Word Count: 1k

Dear Juniper, 

How can I describe the last three days? I can’t really… They have been so amazing… Oh, okay, I’ll just tell you. After we split the other night I went to the club that Sable said Zeppelin would be at and I met Robert Plant. 

I get so lost in those beautiful eyes, wet and wild with azure fire. I would take anything from him, a plaster touch or a fleeting meeting of lips. I only wished to touch him, to have him for the night. I didn’t care what came after. 

“Won’t you join me upstairs?” He asked in his sonorous and deep voice. 

And that accent! It makes my knees wobble. Yes, oh yes, I would follow you into the pits of hell if it meant you would touch me! 

“Sure,” I played it cool. I was the cubes of ice in his glass, clinking against the crystal glass and watering down his whiskey. I was wet watercolor begging to be smudged. I wanted his artist hands to taint me in any way he saw fit. Any addition his mastermind made would add value to the canvas of my body. 

He extended his hand and allowed me to hold it in mine and lead me to the elevator. We left the drab hotel lobby behind and got into the tin tube. We waited for minutes on end, hearing the whir of gears in bated breath. He didn’t ravage me there like I thought he would. He was restrained, by all accounts a gentleman. 

I was over the moon, tickled pink, even! I was going to Join Robert Plant in his hotel room. I couldn’t believe it! 

When we finally got to his room (which felt like a million years) he again showed his chivalrous nature. He asked if I wanted anything to drink, anything to smoke. I said no to both. I just wanted him. I wanted to skip it all. 

So I made sure he knew it. I stepped up to the bed where he sat and put my hand on his thigh. “Is this okay?” I asked, locking eyes with him. Carnal. Sinful. He was starting to get hard already. 

“It’s more than okay, Darling,” he said, refusing to break contact. Eyes and hands were close now, closer yet as he pulled me into his lap. I yelped, shocked by his strength but of course, turned on. 

I put my lips on his at once, a muted moan pouring from my mouth into his like a flow of lusty liquid. 

“This is going to be a wonderful time,” he tittered, now putting me on my back. 

Oh, Juniper, it was amazing! He was so good. He’s such a good guy. He’s so charming. It might be too early… but I fear that I may be in love again. Don’t expect me back anytime soon. I agreed to join him on tour. 

I know I skipped on rent this month, and I’m sorry. Maybe you can talk to Lavender and get it sorted out. Please don’t be upset with me. I think that I have finally found the one, found my happiness. 

With love, 

Lorelei Scanton

-

Dear Lorelei, 

Wow! Robert Plant! I can’t believe it. Well, I can believe it. You were always our blonde bombshell. It’s no surprise that he picked you. 

It’s okay that you missed rent this month. And now the months after. Sable said that if you went to see Zeppelin that you wouldn’t come back. And I knew she was right. If not for Robert, for another. 

I am happy for you. I just don’t want you to get into something like what happened with David. Make sure he knows your heart is sensitive. That you’re sensitive. 

I’ll miss you bunches. I mean… you were such an integral part of the scene. I didn’t wanna tell you this, but Ritchie said he misses you. He told Regina and Thomas, who told Pearl, who told Lilac, who told me. I didn’t say anything while you were still here because I thought it would make you stay. Town is gonna suck without you, but you’ve got to find your happiness. 

Ritchie was an asshole, and David didn’t know what he had. Now you have Robert, who I’ve heard treats his women amazingly. Just don’t get too attached, okay? Please come back to us in one piece. Zeppelin can get crazy. 

Your friend, 

Juniper Lane 

Dear June,

I know it’s scary. I am scared. After what happened with David I thought I was never going to do this again. I promised myself I wouldn’t. I was going to lock my heart away in a cage. I looked myself in the face and promised myself that I wouldn’t ever go through what David put me through. 

I know I am so stupid. He probably has a girlfriend back home, or a wife, maybe even children. David had a girlfriend and kept me like a dirty secret. I know you know how that feels. I know Ginger broke your heart the same way. But with David… I really fell. I thought he loved me. He fooled me. He never meant a moment of it. 

But could you blame me? Who brings someone to Paris if they don’t mean it??? He was so perfect. He spoke French to me. He told me how beautiful I was in multiple languages. How could I not fall in love with that? 

I remember one night we were in the hotel and he told me “if I could eat anything I would eat you out” in French. That would make anyone swoon! I still can’t believe I don’t have him. I think there will always be a part of me that misses him. It’s pathetic and moronic, but it’s true. 

He wasn’t my first love, but he captured me in a vulnerable time. He hooked me for such a short time, but it’ll always be crystalized as an important time in my mind. After the devastation of Steven, I didn’t think I’d ever love again. And then again after David. I guess this is just what happens. You get hurt and you move on. You have to dust yourself off and get over it. 

So now I get to spend a few months with Robert Plant. And who knows what will happen? Maybe he’ll take me back home and this time… it’ll work. Maybe this time it’ll be real. Probably not, but doesn’t that sound so nice? 

How are you? How’s the house? I look forward to you telling me. I know this letter will take forever to get back home. Well, maybe a few days. But not as quick as a phone call. But I don’t want to take the phone from any of the guys calling home. 

This scene is crazy. Everyone… and I mean everyone, is always partying. Even the roadies are getting head in the clubs! Jimmy is really broken up about this girl he has back home. I guess they were pretty serious before he came out here. Robert said he hasn’t slept with anyone else this tour. I’m shocked! This Gwen girl must be pretty serious. Must be pretty special. She’s so lucky. 

Tell Lavender she can keep whatever she borrowed from me. I know she has my black platforms. I won’t be home and she’ll take them with her anyway. I must kiss them goodbye! 

Love, 

Lorelei Scanton

-

Dear Lor, 

I’m happy that you’re opening yourself up again. But this does seem really scary. You know he has a wife. You know he’s not going to take you home. You know he’s no good. He’s a rockstar. No matter what you think about him, he’s only going to hurt you. You know where this road leads. 

I know that you were really fucked up after Steven. I mean, fuck, who wouldn’t be? Especially since this whole war isn’t over. They’re really dragging it on. 

I don’t think you’re stupid, I think you’re lonely and lost. We all are. All of the girls are lost. Lavender, Lilly, Vickie, Lexi, Diamond, me, you… we’re all just looking for something. But these men are not it. They’re just filling the void. I don’t know what your void is. Maybe it’s Steven. Maybe it’s your dad. But you need to fill it with something good if you want to stop being hurt. 

I’m sorry if that’s harsh, but it’s the truth. 

I’m good. The house is shitty, as always. Lavender and Sarah moved in. Lavender took your room and Sarah took Trixie’s old room in the basement. I think Vickie wanted your room and now she’s bitter. But she pissed me off last week so I don’t care. 

She keeps leaving her fucking dishes in the sink! We all know the policy. And she’s just disregarding it. It’s not fair. 

It’s okay that the letters take a while to get here. I like the letters. It reminds me of sending postcards to my nana when I was a kid. Gives me something to look forward to. 

I love you and I hope you stay safe. 

Sincerely, 

Juniper Lane 

-

“Are you okay, Darling?” Robert asked. 

She pursed her lips, looking away from his kind gaze. He put his hand on her back and started to rub up and down her spine, trying his best to coax information out of her. 

“I’m fine. My friend just sent me a letter. And now I’m pissed off.” 

“What did she say?” 

“She thinks I’m an idiot. She thinks I’m wasting my time with you. She thinks you’re just going to hurt me. She doesn’t understand anything and she thinks she does.” 

Robert sighed. 

“That sounds quite complicated, love. Maybe she’s just worried.” 

“I know she is. I just-”

“Is this about the David situation?” 

Now she sighed. He deflated her. 

“Yes.” 

“See, she just cares. Why don’t you give it a few days and write her back?” 

“I should. You’re right,” she buried her face in his neck. Her resolve was broken and she needed to sleep now. 

--------

Taglist:

@anothercanyonlady , @jonesyjonesyjonesy , @paginate54 , @seventieswhore , @jimmypages , @jimmys-zeppelin​ , @jimmysdragonsuit13​

[tamayosclinic]

May I plz request smut?

#63.“I said I’d take care of you, did you think I wouldn’t follow through on that?”, #100. “You’re still horny? Didn’t I fuck you hard enough last night?”

I saw you do one for a geisha. May I plz request for Oiran Reader (Perf for Season 2) with Muzan. Plz❣️

"I said I'd take care of you, did you think I wouldn't follow through on that?" "You're still horny? Didn't I fuck you hard enough last night?" | Muzan x F!Reader

Warning(s): Oral (giving and receiving), vaginal fingering, degradation daddy kink, cumshot, themes of prostitution

Author's Note(s): I was having some writer's block with this one, hence the lack of a post last week. I have 18 more request to go so I'm looking to get them done by the end of next month. Anyways, enough rambling. Enjoy.

Word Count: 874

100+ Followers Event [Closed]

The first visit with an oiran is boring. It’s just a screening where the oiran observes a potential new customer. She doesn’t talk, eats, or do anything sensual with the customer. She watches and makes her decision on whether to continue seeing them. If the customer makes it to the third visit, the real stuff begins. 

One could say that it was forbidden to go all the way on the first visit and that line of thought thrilled Muzan. On the other hand, (Y/n)-oiran was a bit more cautious—as cautious as she could be while sucking his cock. 

Any slight thump in the hallway made her pull away and sit at arm’s length from Muzan until she was sure the coast was clear to resume her activity. Although he didn’t show it, Muzan missed the feeling of her warm mouth around his cock. 

“Why continue if you’re so worried about getting caught?” He finally asked after about the fifth time (Y/n) pulled away.

“I said I’d take care of you; did you think I wouldn’t follow through on that?” 

“Then don’t worry too much,” Muzan whispered against her ear, “I got good senses, and I can tell you there is nobody else but us in this hall. So, calm down and focus on me.” 

“Okay,” (Y/n) gasped as Muzan pushed her head back down to his cock and gagged as it hit the back of her throat. 

Without waiting for her to adjust, Muzan bucked his hips at a gradual pace, hitting the back of her throat each time. Her moans served as a vibrator that sent chills up Muzan’s spine. He let out a few breathy grunts as (Y/n)’s tongue lapped at the vein running down the ridge of his cock. She caught onto the sensitive spot and made sure to give it attention when given a chance. 

All too soon, Muzan’s cock twitched against the roof of her mouth, and his release followed after a few quick thrusts.

“That’s a good girl. You take me so well,” he praised huskily, watching (Y/n) expertly lap up his seed and swallow.

“There is more I have to offer if you will give it to me, master,” (Y/n) mewled through her lusty haze. 

“You want me inside you?” Muzan grinned at the quick nod (Y/n) gave him. She laid her back and spread her legs to present herself to him. She moaned when Muzan briefly kneaded her clit. “If that’s what you wish, on your hands and knees, slut.” 

“Yes, daddy.” (Y/n) didn’t miss the twitch of Muzan’s cock as she said that. She intentionally let her ass brush the head of his cock as she turned and propped herself up on her arms and legs. 

“Cheeky, slut,” Muzan grumbled, giving (Y/n) a firm smack on the ass, and listened to her sweet moans of shock. 

Muzan then spread her folds apart and dug his tongue to explore, earning more of (Y/n)’s moans. He hummed in satisfaction with her sweet taste and withdrew his tongue to make way for his cock. He didn’t miss the way (Y/n) whimpered at his withdrawal, only to inhale sharply and hunch her back as he split her walls apart. 

“Fuck, you feel so good. You like it?” Muzan asked in a strained whisper earning a breathless nod from (Y/n). “Use your words, or is my cock so good you forgot how to speak.” 

“You feel so good,” (Y/n) breathed. “Oh, right there.” She mewled when he hit her g-spot. 

“I knew you’d like it, slut,” Muzan slammed his cock in and out of her cunt. It was a good thing her room was in the furthest hall of the brothel because neither of them kept their volume to a minimum—including the thunderous smack of skin against skin. 

“Daddy, I’m…” (Y/n) was cut short as her breath hitched. 

Her walls closed around Muzan’s cock and tried to milk him, but Muzan pulled out as he felt himself coming close. A few vigor pumps of the fist later, his seed spilled onto her ass. To (Y/n)’s credit, she doesn’t go limp on the bed once her climax ends. Ever so gracefully, she laid down and turned to Muzan. 

“Stay with me.” 

“Clingy, are we?” Muzan taunted though he laid down and let her cuddle close—even bringing her head to rest on his chest. 

While (Y/n)’s breathing steadied and slowed as she fell into a slumber, Muzan remained wide awake for the remainder of the night. Another bonus of (Y/n)’s room is that it faced away from the trajectory of the sunrise, so Muzan was safeguarded even as dawn approached.

(Y/n)’s steady breaths deepened as she woke up and shifted in his arms. “Good morning. Will you be leaving soon?” 

Muzan noticed the desperation in (Y/n)’s voice when she asked that question, “No, not until nightfall.” 

“Oh, so how about we kill some time?” (Y/n) shifted to atop Muzan, and given that they were still naked, she could grind on him without the obstruction of clothes.

“You’re still horny? Didn’t I fuck you hard enough last night?” 

“Yes, you did. I want more. Can you give it to me, daddy?” 

And just like that, Muzan was up and raring for round two.

[your-uncle-sheogorath]

Happy Sunday Lord Sheogorath!

I hope you are well and that this week has been a good one?

If Mora is anything like a librarian then he definitely is plotting revenge ^^;

About the plants, I might be going a tad overboard with that tbh. I have a good 40 of them, but half of them are still seedlings. Plus a few carnivorous plants. And a dozen seeds I intend to start growing next month. There will be colours once they flower: I made sure to get some that attract butterflies and bees. There are also quite a few I can use in cooking or teas..

Erh... Sorry for the plant tangent there, didn't mean to ramble.

Anyway, what have you been up to this week? Was it a busy one?

As per tradition, I wish you an awesome week to come! May it bring you, your loved ones, and all you care for loads of happiness, good fun, and laughter!

Have a good Sunday and take care of yourself!

Hello Sundas Anon!

This week has been acceptable, I suppose. Could have been better but it had its redeeming moments. The family dinner at Count Carolus' place was a good evening! The evening before that, not so much. I... made a soup. Cabbage soup with cheese and honey. And it tasted... baaad. It made me sick, actually. Quite the experience.

Ah but look at me moping! I am completely fine now!

If Mora is plotting revenge and decides to attack, I'll send a contingency of lusty bards to fend off his tentacles and his tentacled minions. Let's see how they like that ha-ha!

Abnur, who asked "is that Sundas Anon?" and is reading over my shoulder, just poked me in the head with a rolled parchment as soon as I typed that joke. Well, the bad joke stays. - Ouch!

Don't apologize for the plant tangent, I enjoyed that! Sounds like you are growing quite the garden. And you said butterflies? Lovely!

Thank you for your kind wishes and I hope that next week will be a good one for you, your loved ones and everyone you cared for! Take good care :3

[lostinfantasies38]

Ten Favorite Dialogues from 2020

I picked 10 dialogue exchanges that I loved from the stories I posted this year. A few of them are from the same stories, since I spent a good chunk of the year working on long fics instead of one shots or shorter stories. Under the cut bc they are lengthy.

I also realized that most of my zingers tend to be in my descriptions and don’t always make it into my character’s dialogue. I might have to change that. 

In no particular order:

1.

Dorian chuckled. “Honestly, you two are disgraceful. You can’t come to a club looking like sex on legs when you aren’t single. You’re going to give people a heart attack.”

“Jealous, Dorian?” Alistair needled.

“Insanely,” he replied smoothly. “Aside from myself and Zevran,”—he saluted the elf who shot him a saucy wink—“you’re the most attractive men here. And to add insult to injury, you’re together,” he sighed dramatically.

Accidental Alliance, a oneshot modern Cullistair AU 

2. 

“Step two of the pie liberation was to avoid suspicion of the adults.” Evan giggled at Connor’s phrasing and thought he heard Alex snort in amusement, too. “Zoe’s job was to act as a distraction, which wasn’t hard to accomplish because Cynthia decked her out in this frilly monstrosity that every woman within a five-mile radius oohed and aahed over. She fucking hated it, of course, but it worked in our favor for The Plan. And yes, those are honest to God capitals, babe. Think Mission Impossible: Thanksgiving 2010.”

“Alternate title: Pie Larceny,” Evan quipped, overjoyed by Connor’s rich laughter. Alex definitely chuckled at that.

“Yes! Oh my God, that’s amazing. I’m totally renaming it Pie Larceny.”

Save Me From Myself - part 3 of my DEH series, Connor Murphy/Evan Hansen

3.

“It makes me want to wrap you in blankets and bubble wrap and smother you with attention until you’re sick of looking at me, though.”

A broken laugh tumbled out of Evan’s mouth. “Well, there’s a mental picture. What are you gonna do? Roll me down the street?”

“I’m working out the logistics, but rolling you around does sound kinda fun,” Connor teased.

Snorting, Evan retorted, “I mean, you do have practice rolling joints. Guess a bundled up boyfriend isn’t much difference.”

Connor’s borderline hysterical laughter almost drowned out Evan’s airy chuckles. “Jesus Christ, Evan,” he wheezed, shakily wiping away tears. 

Save Me From Myself - part 3 of my DEH series, Connor Murphy/Evan Hansen 

4.

Returning his head to the shadows, he hissed, “Sister Agnes is milling around. I need a distraction so I can reach our room.”

Kai grinned and pulled a dehydrated pepper from his pocket. “Down the hatch.”

Gavin stopped him with a concern expression. “Are you sure about this?”

He snorted softly. “Please, I grew up eating these. My mum sends them because she knows I love them. They’re like candy. I’ll be shitting fire for a week, but they don’t hurt my mouth. I’ll burn hot and sweat like crazy though. Trust me, it’ll work.”

The redhead arched an eyebrow. “So you carry them in your pocket at all times?”

“No,” Kai answered irritably. “That’s why I needed Easton earlier. To act as a distraction for me so I could get it out of my room.”

Gavin sighed. “If you’re sure. I mean, we could brawl in the hallway, that would work, too.”

Alistair glanced around the corner. “Hurry up and choose. I’m not waiting forever.” Kai smirked and popped the pepper in his mouth.

“Well, that decides it,” Gavin groaned. Alistair tried not to laugh as over the course of a few minutes, Kai’s face visibly flushed in response to the spicy heat and sweat pooled under his hair, running in rivulets across his face.

“How do I look?” he asked.

“Like you’ve got the sweat,” Gavin replied sardonically.

“Perfect,” he retorted. “Right, good luck, Alistair. If I fail to distract everyone, Gavin’s got you covered.”

Find Me Well Within Your Grace - young Cullistair prequel fic - excerpt from Ch 11 featuring a few of my OCs and Alistair 

5.

Wrapping his arms around her as she hummed at the stove, he said, “Sirra and Alistair either just left my apartment or she only now deigned to tell me they’re gone.”

Eowyn grinned wickedly at him, checking the clock on the dining room wall. “My, my! Four hours later! Scandalous.”

“I wish you could have seen them. The magnetism! It was instant.”

She giggled. “I saw the photos. That’s more of Alistair’s almost-O face than I ever want to see again, thanks very much.”

He snorted. “Fair enough.” After a pause, Zevran chuckled, “I give them a month.”

Rounding on him in horror, Eowyn stared at him with wide mossy eyes. “You just said they were perfect together! Do you think we made a mistake?”

“No, amore mio. I mean, I give them a month before they elope. I might have been party to their engagement shoot today.”

She blinked slowly as the giggles built until she was clutching the kitchen counter in a fit of uncontrolled mirth. “Okay, that may be accurate knowing Alistair!”

“I’m thinking of changing my business cards. Should I add ‘Matchmaker Extraordinaire’ or ‘Signor Soulmate’?” he asked cheekily.

Shot In The Dark - Sirra Brosca/Alistair modern AU oneshot [dialogue shown is between Zevran/OC]

6.

Cullen grinned with him. “Me either. Maybe we can improve your chess skills enough for you to graduate from mediocre.”

“Oh, ha ha. You and the others can have fun with that, thanks very much. Here I was hoping we could spend more time in bed,” he teased, sliding a hand into his curls.

Rolling his eyes playfully, the blonde retorted, “Of course, count on you to think how often we can sleep together instead of improving our skills.”

“That is how we improve our skills.”

“Training skills, you fiend.”

Heaving a melodramatic sigh, Alistair quipped, “Well, one of us has to be the boring one in the relationship. Glad it’s not me.” Cullen elbowed him gently in the ribs, chuckling along with his lover’s bright laughter.

Find Me Well Within Your Grace - young Cullistair prequel fic, excerpt from Ch 12 

7.

“You’re not worthless,” Alistair whispered. The breath she’d been holding passed her lips with a tiny mewl of surprise. Still unable to look at one other, Alistair kept his hand on her wrist and she resisted the urge to scoot further away.

Sirra murmured, “You don’t know me, Alistair. You can’t say that.”

“I can,” he insisted firmly, his fingers pressing just a bit harder on her flesh. “It doesn’t matter who you were. When you join the Grey Wardens, all that matters is who you are. I may not know who you used to be in Orzammar, but I have a pretty good idea who you are in the sun.”

Sun Touched - excerpt from Ch 4

8.

“I’m sorry, Alistair, I wanted to surprise you. Most dwarves in Orzammar, caste and casteless alike, have genital piercings. It’s cultural and unrelated to murder.”

His eyebrows climbed into his hair. “Even the men? How in the Maker’s name does that work?” Sirra opened her mouth to explain, but he hastily held up a hand and shivered. “Rhetorical question. Please do not answer that.”  

Sun Touched - excerpt from Ch 14

9.

“I love you, too,” she murmured, gracing him with a watery smile. “If I had known you were up here, I would have left Orzammar years ago and tracked you down,” Sirra mused, only half joking. 

“Oh, really?” he quirked an eyebrow in amusement. “I can just imagine you sneaking into the droll monastery and breaking me out. I would have assumed you were a figment of my imagination, a desire demon, or Maker-sent. Regardless, I doubt I could have resisted the mischievous glint in your eyes as you crept in to find me in my smalls, surrounded by thirty other recruits, and told me to run away with you.” 

Laughing, Sirra raked her short nails down his toned chest. “A naked teenage version of you? I would have taken you on the spot, letting the recruits feast their eyes on us, before dashing out the front door with your bare ass in tow.” 

He closed his eyes with a lusty moan, and swallowed hard, his voice strained when he replied. “Definitely Maker-sent then. To think, we could have been on the lam for the last few years, making mad love wherever we went.” 

Sighing melodramatically, Alistair smirked and playfully bopped the tip of her nose with his. “Ah, well, at least I have you now and that’s all that matters.”

Sun Touched - excerpt from Ch 17

10.

“Stop it,” Morrigan mumbled irritably.

Alistair feigned innocence. “Stop what? I’m sitting here like a good patient. I wasn’t even talking until right now.”

Yellow eyes bored into hazel as the subtle light faded around them, his shoulder apparently healed. “You know very well what. Stop staring at my hands. ‘Tis most distracting.”

“And here I thought it was my hands distracting you during the fight,” he smirked. “Not where my eyes happened to land. How could you have known that I might have been paying attention, if you weren’t observing me, too, hmm?”

Scoffing, Morrigan took a large step back and crossed her arms haughtily over her chest. “You are insufferable.”

Sheathing his sword, Alistair shrugged with affected boredom. “I may be insufferable, Morrigan, but that doesn’t mean I’m wrong. Deny it all you want, but we both know the truth.” 

Snagging his shield from where it fell on the ground, he slung it over his back and murmured for her ears alone. “Besides, for a cranky witch who grew up in a swamp, they’re surprisingly soft and gentle… when they want to be, that is.” 

You Give Me That Lovin’ Feelin’ - ch 2. Part 1 of 3 of Morristair written for @scharoux 14 Days of DA Lovers 

[duker42]

AHHH ok I’m sorry ur so busy omg. But here’s my request (deep breath): could you write a one-shot set around the rise of Floch and the Yeagerists, and y/n and Levi are together but the tensions have put a strain on their relationship and they’re not sure if they’re gonna make it as a couple. But when Levi has to escort zeke in the woods, y/n is the one who smuggled pregnant historia to the safe house to protect her (in my mind my character is always a medic for the sc) CONTINUES!

I LOVE THIS ONE SOOOOOOOOO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍

*****WARNING*****NSFW

💜Making It Count💜

She glared at him from across the table. Captain Levi just folded his arms and glared right back at her. Bastard.

Yet another day spend arguing. Another petty squabble that had started to tear their seemingly solid relationship apart. So many nights were now spend trading hot words, or cold silence. Too many nights spent alone in a bed for two to find that he had resumed his habit of sleeping in his office chair the next morning.

Y/N blamed the fucking Yeagerists. They were fine until that bastard Zeke Yeager had been brought back to Paradise and Eren had decided to put more faith in his bastard brother who had killed all their friends, rather than trusting the military and his comrades. Some days Y/N believed that maybe Eren needed to be eaten by another Titan.

Everything about their current situation had put Levi in an eternally bad mood. Which he decided to express by picking the most random fights and having it blow up into full on screaming matches sometimes. At least on Y/N’s part. He just stared with that dead eyed look that made Y/N want to slap his face.

She honestly didn’t know if their relationship was going to make it. They had been together since the 53rd Expedition, but all the changes over the last few years, but especially the last few months made Levi withdraw more, act more aloof.

“Right! So Y/N, I’m going to need you to escort Historia to the farmhouse. Luckily neither Floch or any of the others we suspect of being Yeagerists have ever been there. I want you to stay with her through the delivery of her baby, for obvious reasons.”

Y/N nodded at Commander Hanji. As a Medic, Y/N was trained to handle everything from severed limbs to childbirth. Being with their Queen as she entered the final months of her pregnancy made complete sense.

“Levi, I need you to go babysit our guest of honor.” Hanji turned her eye on the stoic raven haired Captain.

Levi scowled. “Why don’t I just kill the bastard and we get on with this?”

“We need him alive to control Eren right now. Take him out the forest and wait there. I’m sending a large group of Scouts with you. Try not to scare all of them, or kill them.” Hanji teased.

“No promises.” Levi shot back, glowering at the prospect of having to camp in the woods for Gods only knows how long with a man he completely loathed.

“Alright you two, dismissed. Enjoy your last night together for awhile.” Hanji waved them off as she turned her attention to the desk behind her loaded down with paperwork.

Sighing, Y/N got to her feet and walked out of the Commander’s office. She knew that Levi was behind her, she could feel his eyes bore into the back of her head. She refused to apologize for accidentally soiling his extra cravat when she dumped her laundry in the basket, not realizing he had not gotten his clean clothes out of it. She had offered to clean it, but after screaming at her that she never would do it right, she had shut up and not said another word do him.

When she reached their room, she pushed the door open and had a split second idea to close it in his face, but decided to be the bigger person. She walked through the sitting room to the bedroom beyond and pulled out her travel bag. She ignored him leaning against the door as she pulled her clothes out of the wardrobe they shares and neatly packed it into the bag.

Levi watched as Y/N almost emptied all of her belongings into the bag. If it weren’t the few books and baubles laying around the room, he would believe she was moving out of their room for good.

He frowned. She might not come back, or he might not. It could be one person living in this room without the other, but not because of a break up. Even if they did survive this shitty predicament, they may not see each other for months. He didn’t like either option. Despite all the troubles over the past few months, he loved her more than anything.

He knew he had been an unreasonable asshole. She hadn’t deserved everything he had harped on her about. He got so damned hypercritical due to the stress of the situation, his inability to control what was a rapidly spiraling situation. Even during the time they had been hunted by their own government, Levi had never felt as helpless as he did right now.

He watched the graceful movements of the woman he desperately loved as she prepared to leave in the morning. If all they had was tonight, he was going to make it count.

“Y/N.......I’m s-sorry.” Levi hated when he stuttered. It had happened when he first discovered he felt something more for Y/N. It had gone away as he got comfortable with her, but he hated the weakness every time it showed up. Even if Y/N always claimed she found it cute.

Y/N paused and turned around. It had been a long time since Levi had apologized for any of the squabbles they had been having, opting for stony silence. He had finally let down the guards that he put back up after their flights had started, letting her see the emotion in his eyes.

His grey eyes watched her softly, as if he was trying to memorize her in this moment. He had been thinking the same things that had been running through her own mind. She knew the risks they were both taking, especially Levi. She didn’t like the idea of him being in the woods with the man that controlled the Beast Titan.

She put her bag on the ground and move over to her lover, laying a hand gently on his cheek. “I’m sorry too, for all the fighting. Our last night needs to be just us, together, no harsh words or feelings.”

“I know I’m an asshole. You deserve so much better than me, Y/N.” His eyes closed as he leaned against her hand. He wanted so badly to be what Y/N deserved, but always felt he wasn’t good enough, the blood on his hands and his past deeds keeping him from that goal.

Y/N smiled as Levi opened his eyes again. She moved that hand from his cheek to the back of his neck and let her other hand join it, her fingers running through the fresh undercut of his hair. “I want no one other than you, Levi Ackerman.” She whispered. “I love you.”

He leaned his head against hers, foreheads touching as he sighed. It had been so long since he had heard those words from her. The same feeling he had the first time she told him that washed through him. “I love you too, Y/N.”

He pressed his thinner lips against hers, letting himself show her how he really felt about her. He hadn’t felt her against him in so long, denying himself the pleasure of sleeping next to her during the night. It wasn’t because he was mad at her like he knew she assumed, it was because he was mad at himself for being unable to just express his fears of the future like a normal human being.

He wouldn’t let anything interfere with tonight. He would make sure that Y/N had no doubt about the love that he had for her as they parted ways tomorrow morning for their separate missions.

Y/N moaned into the kiss, enjoying the feeling of his warm lips and the emotions behind them. She moved her hands to run down his chest, savoring the feeling of his hard body beneath her fingers. She pushed his jacket back as she moved to take it off of him.

Levi felt his heartbeat speed up. The jolt of lust that he had been repressing through all the bickering and fighting came rushing through his system, making him burn to feel her beneath him, around him. He started to harden at her almost innocent touch, but he knew exactly what she wanted and he wanted the same.

He set her away and pushed her down lightly on their bed. He let himself grin wickedly at her as he moved to remove his cravat, unraveling it from his throat and setting it on the bedside table. His straps were quickly shed, years of practice making it look easy. He watched her eyes darken with lust as he reached for the buttons on his shirt. A thrill raced through him at that look, something he was always surprised to see when she watched him undress.

Her eyes traced the hard lines on his chest and stomach as he threw the shirt on the chair. He pulled his boots off but left his trousers on as he climbed on the bed to join her. His hands roamed over her, reacquainting himself with her curves as he started gently removing her own clothes. His blood pressure rose with every inch of her beautiful skin he exposed.

Soon enough she was bare on their bed, her body flush with excitement from the light touches he had run over her as he stripped her. Levi groaned at the sight. She was so damned beautiful. He leaned down and kissed her hip, letting his hand wander up from her hip to cup her breast as he nipped at the soft skin.

Her nipple was hard as he brushed a thumb across it. He groaned as she arched up, eager for his touch. Even after all these years, he was amazed at how responsive she was to him. Her hands were moving, clutching at his hair and shoulder, wanting him to come up to her.

Granting her wish, he rose up slightly, moving his mouth from her hip to her breast, laving the forgotten mound with his tongue as he continued to pluck at the other breast with his fingers. Her legs shifted restlessly beneath her, rubbing and pressing together as he knew the heat between them was increasing.

She launched her own attack of touches. Her hands tracing every muscle line and scar she could reach. Stroking his back as he continued to suckle her. Her lusty cry of pleasure when he gently bit down on her breast make him push his hips into her thighs, grinding his covered erection against her.

Y/N was desperate for him as she felt his heavy length against her thigh. It had been so long since she had felt his weight on top of her, received him into her body. She moved her hand down to reach in between them and cup him, feeling him shudder as she pushed her palm against his cock.

“Levi...please....” She panted as he finally released her breast and moved up her chest slowly, sucking at the skin harshly to leave marks that would last for days.

Levi grinned against her skin. He loved when she begged. “What?” He asked, his normal dry tone lust filled and husky.

“I need you!” She grabbed the button of his trousers as she hurried to free him from the materials keeping him from her.

When she got his pants unbuttoned, she didn’t try to strip them off like he expected, instead shoving her hand in them and firmly grasping his cock in her hand to pull him out. It was his turn to groan at the feel of her hand wrapping around him.

She wasted no time in smearing the pearl of liquid that had built up at the tip of his aching cock all around the head, making him clench his jaw from the feeling.

He pushed her hand off of him, afraid if she continued, he was going to finish too soon. It had been way too long since he had cum to allow her hands on him for long. She knew exactly how to make him loose control. He moved up and straddled her chest, reaching for the cravat he had laid beside the bed as he brought her hands up to the headboard.

Y/N shivered in anticipation as Levi tied her hands to the headboard with his cravat. His body so close to her, with his cock bobbing so temptingly in front of her as he concentrated on making sure she was secure. She couldn’t help but lunge forward and engulf the reddened tip in her mouth, taking him as far as she could reach. His hands fumbled with the cloth as his hips bucked forward involuntarily at the feel of her hot mouth around him.

Levi gasped as he regained his composure. His teeth gnashes together as he finished tying her up. Y/N looked disappointed as he pulled his cock away from her, like a child who had been denied their favorite sweet. But there was no way he was going to unravel before she had cried out his name tonight. He climbed off of her and removed his pants, groaning at the relieved pressure from his tight confines.

He gave her a hot look as he moved down her body, not angry but dark with desire. Her own dark eyes watching him intently, eagle eyed as she wondered what his next move would be. Under normal circumstances, he would slid into her and start fucking her relentlessly as she ached to touch him, but tonight wasn’t normal and he wasn’t leaving this bed until he had tasted her.

Her eyes widened with surprise as he moved down in between her legs, his shoulders spreading her thigh wide for him to settle comfortably. It was rare he loved her with his mouth, opting for his talented fingers to prepare her for him. It wasn’t because it was nasty or what he would have normally thought about the act with someone else, just something that fell by the wayside as they progressed into a less sex-starved stage of their relationship.

He broke their gaze to look down at the glistening pink folds of her pussy. She was already so wet and slick with desire, he felt his cock jump. Looking back up at her, he reached down and devoured her sex in his mouth with unrestrained enthusiasm. She arched up and moaned, Levi’s eyes flashed his approval as he continued trying to pull as much of her into his mouth as his could. His tongue was roaming, mapping the slits and creases, teasing over the bundle of nerves.

He had always thought of it as a French kiss to her pussy, her clit was her tongue and his job was to tangle his own tongue with it as much as possible. He saw her already pulling at the cravat keeping her from moving too far, her legs tightening under his arms, where he had them looped around her, holding her open for her. Her chest was heaving with excitement, trying to draw in enough breath as he decided to nibble on the little nub of skin lightly, moving his teeth back and forth as her hips rose to meet him.

He was driving her crazy. His mouth on her with those eyes that looked like molten iron from desire watching her. Every flick of his tongue was pushing her closer, making the spring of tension wind tighter deep inside her. She felt his tongue prob her entrance and she shook her head, pushing her hips down into the mattress, forcing his tongue back to where it was. He chuckled as he complied with her demand, dark and lusty.

He was done playing, he wanted her to cum, arch against the restraints while crying out his name. He pulled her clit back in between his teeth and started to suckle hard, flicking his tongue around it as he did. The trigger was instantaneous. She lunged forward, her face surprised as her orgasm coursed through her entire body. He could feel the contractions of her core against his chin as he continued his assault on her. The rush of juices from her center started wetting his chin as he felt her tremble beneath his hands and her hips lift up, pushing into his face harder as she screamed out her pleasure.

Working her through the intense experience, he soon felt her try to pull away, her body overstimulated as her hips pulled down, trying to get away from his tongue. He released her cllt and moved down to lick up the fruits of his labor. He lazily lapped up some of her juices as he felt her relax underneath him.

Moving up, he wiped his chin, smug in his prowess and positioned himself at her entrance. She felt the tip of his cock slid around her, him moving himself with his hand fisted around his length, a small sigh slipping out of his lips at her wetness. He hovered over her, gathering her boneless body to him as he slid into her and released her from his cravat at the same time.

It was like slipping into a hot, tight pouch made just for his cock. Her walls instantly tightened around his invasion. Her arms feel down around him and her fingers dug into the skin of his back as he started to move. Surging into her body felt like coming home, every thrust a reaffirmation of his love for her.

His hips moved forward as he felt her legs wrap around him. He moved his hands to her rotating hips, his fingers gripping the soft flesh hard, knowing he would leave marks for days to come. His shaft filled her, the head pressing against the back wall of her cervix, slightly pushing it in with every push against it.

Her breathing had started to catch. Little high pitched sounds coming from her throat as he found that spot deep inside her that drove her crazy. Every rub against it, a little more of wetness emerged around him, causing him to groan against her throat. He moved his arms up, sliding them under her and crushing her chest to his. He couldn’t get close enough to her. The sweat and the arousal coming off of her addicting, as they moved as identity, striving to reach the stars together.

He felt his own threads of sanity snapping, causing him to move a bit faster, pushing a little deeper. Y/N’s walls were pulsing around him, pulling him closer to the edge with every tight throb. Her hands had moved up to his hair, pulling just enough to sting as she started chanting his name, practically sobbing it as she balanced on the knife’s edge of her own precipice.

Levi lifted his head and covered her mouth with his right as she fell off the edge. His tongue tangled with hers as she cried out, his mouth swallowing the sound, pulling it into him to savor on the days to come as she clenched around him. Her feet locked tighter, as if afraid he would try to leave her before she was done. He wouldn’t dream of being anywhere in that moment than where he was, deep inside her as he stopped pulling out and just pushed his hips harder against her, driving her deeper into the mattress.

His own body tightened as she maintained her vice like grip on his cock. Heaving against her, he felt his own release slam into him, making him lightheaded and his own startled cry of pleasure ripping out of his throat as he thrust as hard as he could against her. The jettison of his cum pulsing into her body made white dots appear in his vision as he desperately kissed her with every ounce of his being.

When it was over, his gasping breaths against her mouth were mirrored by her own. His weight fully relaxed on top of her as he felt her moved to idly stroke his back, her body humming with satisfaction. He closed his eyes and just enjoyed the moment, his own body completely sated and limp.

Eventually, he rolled off of her, pulling out gently and lay beside her, his arm still under her as he moved to pull her against him. She came to him easily, her head resting against his chest and her leg thrown careless over his. Those gentle fingers of hers started stroking the flesh over his heart, making him shiver with the unspoiled emotions of the moment.

As soon as he could recover, he had every intention of making love to her again. He was selfish, wanting more of her, more of what they created together. The feelings it brought out of him paired with the physical pleasure was more than what Levi had ever hoped to experience in his life. He wanted to make every last second he had with her count.

They would have to get up, clean up eventually. Tomorrow they would have to part, unsure if or when they would see each other again. The tension and strife of their daily lives would return, but this moment was perfect in its simplicity. Just Levi and Y/N together in their love for one another. It was their own little version of Heaven in their cruel world.

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[smolvenger]

A Court of Mischief and Purpose Chapter Eight (Loki x fem! Reader A Court of Thorns and Roses Hiddlesverse AU)

Series Summary: Sarah J Maas's A Court of Thorns and Roses series reimagined with Tom Hiddleston's various characters- Especially the events in the second book: A Court of Mist and Fury. England. 1885. You are dying of tuberculosis right before your upcoming wedding to the Lusty Vicar of Aldwinter, Will Ransome. As you lay on what could be your deathbed, the god of mischief Loki appears before you with a deal. He will heal you in time for the wedding...if you spend a week of every month with him.

Chapter Summary: A plan is made for Stella's rescue. Hal takes you to a tavern. And you and Thomas must face the test of The Weaver's Cottage.

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Word Count: >7K

Chapter Warnings: Drunkness, mentions of kidnapping, and Loki getting jealous. A creepy ending- Happy Halloween, y'all!

A03//My Ko-Fi//My Etsy Shop//Masterlist//Wattpad

Taglist: @asgards-princess-of-mischief @jennyggggrrr @five-miles-over @fictive-sl0th @ladycamillewrites @villainousshakespeare @holdmytesseract @eleniblue @twhxhck @lokisgoodgirl @lovelysizzlingbluebird @raqnarokr @holymultiplefandomsbatman @michelleleewise @wolfsmom1 @cheekyscamp @mochie85 @fandxmslxt69

“He has her! Grendel has kidnapped Stella!” you cried out loud. You put a hand to your mouth in shock.

“What on earth do you mean? What is a Grendel? Who is he?” your mother asked.

The paper began to shake in your hand. Heads all turned to you.

“Does he have her?” Mr. Harris cried, you saw tears in his eyes too.

“He is…someone who is…he’s…he’s dangerous. And ambitious. He’s a…a monster, to say the least…and he has her,” you explained simply, tears again falling down your face.

Jonathan opened his hand to silently ask to receive the paper. He looked at it once then returned it to you. He promptly got up. His jaw was tight and his hands crumpled to fists by his side.

“Mr. and Mrs. Harris. May I inspect your house? There might be more clues as to where she is,” he asked.

“Yes…you may…” Mr. Harris nodded.

Jonathan immediately walked out the door and followed the Harris’s straight to their house. Your steps paused before the door. When you checked the grandfather clock, it struck 11- you knew your now ex-fiancee liked to walk in the late mornings. So…he must be gone now, unaware of the chaos here. Still, you peeked out the door. Checking the streets for the sight of a green-striped scarf. There was none. You opened the door and hurried over to Stella’s house behind them. 

The house was in complete disarray. Chairs were knocked over. Pillows are tossed around everywhere. The feathers from the chairs had dusted the ground like snow. You saw bootprints on the floor. Jonathan searched around each one, looking carefully at the prints. Their dirt scraped all over the dark wood. He touched them, studying them as he looked over each particle of dust. Then he got back up.

“May I see her room? he asked.

Her mother nodded her yellow head, blonde hairs already in disarray from their smooth, neat bun. She made no effort to wipe them back into place.

Jonathan hurried to Stella’s room and you followed him. There were papers from the letters she was writing. Cerulean cushions ripped to shreds. One of her brown boxes was knocked over- her tiny blue shells and tiny blue spoons spilled onto the floor. With a silent sob, you got down and put it back in. You saw scratches against the wallpaper, and small pictures on the wall knocked down. There must have been a struggle. Jonathan went through every bit of her room, searching under the blankets of her bed and through her wardrobe. 

She fought…she must have fought a little….and she told us where she was- who had her…oh! Poor Stella! Why are you in so much trouble lately?! I could shake you! You thought. 

Jonathan looked at the desk and saw an envelope. He urged you over. It had your name in large, distinct letters. He handed it to you.

“Is this her hand?” he asked.

It was too…too heavy. Too jagged and pointed. 

“No…I don’t think it is.,” you answered, shaking your head.

“Then it is not Stella’s letter to you…” he concluded.

He opened the seal. Right inside was a folded piece of paper. But once he unfolded it before you…it was blank. Nothing but the yellow, rectangular stationary. Stella’s parents came up behind and grabbed it eagerly. 

“Nothing on it…” he confirmed.

“Nothing! Why nothing?!” her mother cried. “It’s nothing but rubbish! It won’t get my child back!” Before she fell down, sobbing in a heap on the floor. The sound made you feel as if your heart was being ripped into ribbons. Her husband went to comfort her, though he was crying too. 

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

“God’s blood! What misery!” Hal cried, his face as astonished as yours as you returned to Asgard and explained what happened.

All gathered around to look at the blank piece of paper. It was your private space for meetings. A dining area with a large wooden table and chairs. High marble walls and columns signature of the palace. But with doors shut and locked tight for the secrets within.

You were still shaking. Thomas suggested some chamomile tea which you sipped on pitifully as you sat. Thomas sat next to you with some tea of his own. The white tray and set looked so lovely, peaceful, and delicate contrasting with the dark wood. He added a sugar cube into his cup and drank, attempting and failing to come up with a comforting phrase. Robert brought out a cigarette to smoke. It made the air smell sour. Hal was trying to look at the paper for any hint. Sometimes Loki would look at the paper himself. He tried to use his magic on it- but nothing. Loki was crossing his arms as he leaned against a wall. He was thinking as his eyes scanned over all of them. Jonathan stood frozen as he watched each of you, his jaw still tight. He had not said a word since you returned to Asgard.

“Stella…She could be…be dead by now…” you mused pitifully, staring into the bright yellow of the tea.

“YN, call it intuition…but perhaps not,” Loki attempted to console. “Grendel must be keeping her, and he must have wanted you to see this little scrap. Why else put your name on it? Perhaps there is something on it. But the key is to know why. Here- let’s hand our dear lady the letter, gentlemen.”

Setting the tea down, you grabbed the thin, yellow paper in your hands from Hal. There was nothing- nothing. Grendel was mocking you. Yes, that was why he made it! To give you false hope. You crumbled it with your fists into a ball.

You put your hands to the edges of the paper.

“Stupid, stupid thing!” you ranted at it.

You were ready to tear it to shreds. But Hal put a hand over yours.

“Sweet lady- we must be careful…if Grendel left this, he must have will’d it,” Hal mused.

Was Grendel mocking you!? Leaving your name on the envelope and putting blank paper on it to give you false hope for a minute? You felt yourself get white-hot with your fear, your grief, and your rage. It went down your forehead to the paper in your hands.

You used your fire and impulsively lit it up.-the men all gasped and turned to you.  

But it didn’t burn. Not a bit. There was no smell of burnt paper and not one inch of the ball looked black. It was on fire- but the paper was still that tan yellow. The flames an orange orb around the paper ball, nothing more.

“Norns,” Loki muttered in amazement. 

When you stopped it, it was still an untouched heap. As if the fire never brushed against it. You uncrumpled it, opening it up. It was crinkled…but it wasn’t blank. 

Black ink stretched on it. It made a series of streets. Little squares that became houses. One had an X. Then from that square emerged dashes that became a path.

“It’s a map! A map of Aldwinter!” you realized out loud. The men gathered like chickens to all watch over your shoulder. Even Jonathan hurried from his frozen state to watch.

 It led out of the town into the woods at the bottom of the map. Represented by trees. The dashes then paused right in the heart of the woods. Two lines crossed each other, forming an X.

“Then…it’s a map to where they are. And where they have Miss Harris,” Thomas concluded.

There was dead silence in the room. You clutched the map to your chest and turned to Loki.

“Please- please take me there now, Loki! I have to find her! I have to save her!” you begged.

“My dear, I normally would. I do not doubt your abilities…but, why would Grendel want you. Not her parents, not anyone else, but you to find it? Why would he make sure only your magic worked to show the map?” he pointed out. 

It hit you.

“It’s a trap. For me,” you said.

Loki gave a sad nod of his head. Hal took another look at the envelope and then back at you.

“My lady- I must agree. Think about it…remember what the prophet bespoke. Grendel is interested in you. He came here for this purpose. He discovered who your companion was.  He, upon my life, is luring you…” Hal began.

“Using Stella as bait,” you said quietly, finishing the thought.

You set the map down. Your throat felt scratchy and your breaths were fast, almost hyperventilating. You turned to them to stand up. All of you in a circle around each other.

“You’re right…but…we can’t just leave her! They could…could torture her, or….or worse! Don’t any of you understand in battles what happens to women who are captured?!” you cried. Your stomach turned with the realization. 

“I don’t want you to be their captive too, Y/N. None of us do. Perhaps we should all go,” Robert suggested. 

“We cannot all charge unprepared into that camp!” Loki refused.

Jonathan walked over to the table. He grabbed the map and studied it. His intense, determined face turned to look at all of you. Then, he finally finished the debate. 

“I’m getting her back.”

Robert said, “You might die.”

Jonathan had anger in his glare at the doctor. He only repeated, “I’m. Getting. Her. Back.”

Loki raised an eyebrow and smiled.

“Do you think you could get them to let you in? Win them over…then find her and get her back?” Loki asked.

“I’m going to do it,” Jonathan said.

“I agree- if any of us goes after poor little Stella, It should be the most determined one out of all of us- the one most used to danger and sneaking around for damsels in distress.”

Jonathan’s eyes looked a little sad. He went to you, his voice soft.

“YN, The last time I got involved in bigger things, an innocent woman was killed….Here again, another blameless woman is caught in the crossfire. But I swear to you, she will not suffer Sophie’s fate. I won’t let it…can you trust me? To do right this time?”

You nodded your head.

“Yes, yes I do….And back to her family?” you asked.

“Grendel already knows where she lives…” Thomas pointed out.

Another heavy pause fell.

“We’ll take her to Asgard. Now it’s the safest place for her to stay.” Loki said.

The plan was set. Jonathan was going to walk into camp. He would pretend to be a recruit hoping to join Grendel’s forces. Then, when their backs were turned to him, he would find Stella and bring her to Asgard immediately. They already knew where she was- Asgard would be the safest place for her for the time being. 

Thomas hurried to his workshop and he retrieved a small pocket watch.

“Loki infused it with magic. Once you have her, click the watch to midnight and it will let out a signal for Loki to create a portal. Or to signal that you need more help.”

Thomas also brought out a steel dagger. Small with an onyx handle- but the blade was shiny and sharp.

“This too, Mr. Pine. Should the odd magical creature attack, you shall not be unarmed. It shall blast Loki’s magic for an attack. And it’s sharp enough to kill if need be,” he said.

Jonathan felt the dagger in his hand and then sheathed it. 

Loki then conjured him back in the old blue suit of the time period. You hurried up to your room and fetched the picture of everyone on the beach. You brought it back and gave it to Jonathan before the portal was made.

“Here- so you remember what she looks like! It has been a while since our visit- but Stella is the one with her hair in a braid!” you offered.

Jonathan studied the picture and then placed it in the inner breast pocket of his suit.

“That will be helpful, thank you, Y/N,” he said, giving a small smile. 

Everyone turned around to him in that meeting room. He met all of your eyes

“I will get in quick. Fool them. And get her out by whatever means necessary,” he promised everyone.

Loki circled his hands. A yellow portal to your home appeared before him.

“Enjoy your moment of being a hero,” he said, one finger of his hand drawing a circle in the air to keep the portal open.

Jonathan’s eyes steeled forward. He never looked left or right but straight. With a powerful determination, as if nothing else in any realm could tear him apart from his mission, he walked. Walked powerfully, as if he dominated each step he took. As if he would kill anyone who got in his way.

He walked into the portal and headed off to Midgard, to your town. 

You didn’t know what deities now ruled over Stella’s or Jonathan’s fate.  But you said a silent prayer. One of gratitude for his bravery. Then one for her protection. Loki flicked his hand and the portal vanished. Shrinking into a tiny circle and then flickering away like the last ember of a candle blown out. 

Everyone let out a breath they weren’t aware they were holding. Looking at each other in amazement.

“Now, it’s all a simple matter of waiting,” Loki announced.

He was right. Yet your heart was still racing. Your mind racing too. What was going on by now? Yes, it was only a minute, but still…You looked down onto the floor, your palms clammy.

You sat down onto the table, lowering your head onto it. 

“They could both die….I don’t know if even my embroidery will distract me,” you sighed.

You felt a hand touch your back in comfort. When you looked up it was Loki’s hand, his features softening. His hand moved to your shoulder and gave it a gentle squeeze.

“You underestimate Jonathan. The man fooled someone as powerful as Roper. He killed men with his bare hands. And I assure you, he is the one most qualified for this little quest.”

Prince Hal walked over and approached you, he leaned down so he could meet your eyes.

“Well now…sitting and dwelling is not going to work. And if there is naught to do, there is naught- YN! Let us go out! I still owe you a drink!” Hal promised with a smile.

You looked up at him, your mouth opening a little.

“A drink?” you repeated.

“We should distract ourselves and head out to the Angan Tavern! It’s the best one here! How about it?” he offered.

He turned towards the remaining variants. Loki scowled.

“No- I have a book I’m rather interested in. I’m right at the climax and I wish to read how it ends,” Loki replied.

Thomas gave a small, delighted smile. “I could try it, just one drink,” he replied.

“Why, fuck yes the Angan! What are we doing loitering here when we could be there!” Robert cheered. 

Hal went back to you. “Doesn’t it sound nice, YN? Just a drink?” 

He offered his hand up. You accepted it. Loki began to glower quietly as you did.

“Alright…let’s go then…” you replied.

Ignoring the god’s death glare, Hal smiled and led all of you out of the palace to the Asgard streets.

It was the evening when the sky was pink and the sun turned orange when its light peeked between buildings. The air was sweet and cool and full of the smells of roast spits on turning spikes over fires. Residents of Asgard went about their business. Dressed in their robes, tunics, and leathers.  Children were playing in the streets, laughing. Their mothers called out for them to return home for supper. There were statues so tall that you only reached up to their foot. Hal practically strutted his way down. Then he found the wooden sign of the tavern- an image of a smiling moon with lettering that read “ANGORN.”

“Our Night Manager cannot be the sober one among us this time. So this time, it should be Thomas! If one person in our circle needs to get drunk the most, I’ll be it’s YN!” Robert teased, waving his hand over to the party.

Hal held the door open gallantly as you walked in, the men behind you. It was a wooden, rustic tavern. It felt medieval- so unlike the pub back home which was dark, dirty, and damp. You heard a fiddle playing a jig. Customers went about. Red-cheeked and laughing.

So much life. Bustle. Carefree chatter. No fear of death. For oneself or others. Only the joy of the moment. It radiated through the place as you joined the others to fetch someone to bring you ale. The fiddle began to play again with a few other instruments. People gathered in pairs at a clear spot in the middle of the tavern.

“Here-YN! Dance with me!” Hal offered with a hand outstretched again. “Will you?” 

“Why, of course!” you agreed with a smile. 

You took his hand and found that the dances were not hard to learn. In fact, they were very similar to the country dances you learned. Hal was not the best dance partner, but he was enthusiastic. He might have mixed up left and right. But he was smiling. 

 You forgot your fears- your growing powers, your friend in danger. There was nothing more you could do. Just dance and drink. 

The ale tasted fresh, even bubbly in your mouth. It was as if the liquid sparkled all over your tongue. A flavor like crisp apples in the harvest. You could feel it sliding down with only a faint burn into your belly. Robert was already chugging down his in greedy gulps. Thomas sipped his politely.

Hal however, was clearly the favorite patron of the tavern. He would grin and laugh at people’s jokes. He was relaxed. He told stories, waving his hand to gesticulate the best parts. And he would bring so many people over to meet you all. You shook so many hands and so many names were given they flew by you. 

“I was talking to this fellow- Narfi is his name. He’s a tailor, he is fond of dresses! Makes some of the most beautiful ones! We were quite good friends here- he should come back! Maybe Y/N should consider some! Or we all should! Go about in robes like we’re all Romans again!” Hal chatted.

“I don’t think it’d flatter me,” Thomas replied.

 Hal burst into laughter. He put up his second ale and chugged half of it. 

The song ended and the dancers clapped. You both headed back to your table. Robert was gearing up for more dancing and his third drink. Thomas had already ordered food before all of you. Hal guided you to another clumsy dance with him. And what did you care for his abilities? The music was joyous and you felt like flying as you passed between other dancers to return to him. Once you returned, you were sweaty and breathless from the exercise. 

“I could use a glass of water,” you commented. 

“I could use a glass of wine-” Hal quipped.

The dinner was served. Yoast pork, potatoes with thick mounds of butter with thick slices of cheese. Thomas already was getting out his fork and knife to cut it into small bits. Robert took big bites, talking about how hungry he was. Hal stabbed his potato with a fork and eagerly shoved it into his mouth. One of the servers brought a large glass of red wine which he began to drink on. 

You turned over to him, gathering some food onto your plate to eat.

“Hal…you sure do go to a lot of peasant taverns for a prince. A crown prince. Do you do this in your time?” you prodded. You didn’t remember too much of your history lessons in school about Henry the Fifth’s life before he was king. 

“Yes- all the time!” Hal answered.

“I have heard it said you are known as the rebellious prince….” Thomas commented.

“I am, sir. But…”

A serious shadow fell over Hal’s face.

“It was never my intention to be this…shameful, bad thing.”

You began to eat the warm food. The pork was of a cheaper kind but it was still juicy and flavorful. The butter and cheese complimented the potatoes wonderfully. You chewed on them as you listened to Hal explain. 

“My plan was…to pretend to be the drunk, wayward son, the rebel…and that way, when my time came to reclaim the throne, I would cast it off. I would never see my tavern companions again. Reveal myself as competent. Wise. No matter how badly I failed as king- I would always be seen as great. Not a riotous son…”

“So, a good king they say by default?” Thomas asked.

Hal nodded.

“That…that sounds like a lot…and they believe you are that riotous son…” you said.

Hal’s face gravened.

“Yes…yes they do. And I found I made friends. Good friends. Friends I missed. I enjoyed myself with whores. And came back for another one the next day. Before I knew it…I told myself today would be the end. The last day. Then…it’d start again. I…I’ve become what I pretended. My own father scolds me. Struck me once. And told me how he wished for a fellow named Hotspur  to be his son…the one trying to usurp the very throne of my father…”

You froze and stared with wide eyes.

“Hal…That’s too harsh for a father to say!” you gasped.

The rebellious prince had a grim twist to his mouth.

“And this, my dear sirs and lady…this is why I am a part of this quest for Grendel. I have dishonored myself so much that I must gain honor. I crave it. If it is bad to want it, then I am the worst sinner of all. What better honor than saving our delicate little worlds? Then…I will show them, show my father…how fit I am to be king…” he explained.

He exhaled deeply through his nose. He picked up his wine again.

“Even, if I merely show all of you how one uses a sword…I may help all of you,” he said. He gave a small toast and had a sip. 

You nodded your head, leaning closer to him. 

“I think…I think you are. You’re doing everything you can. And that’s good, Hal. I think you will. Your father will hear of this and if he believes you, you will gain honor again,” you replied.

His mouth became a small smile, nodding his head at you.

“Thank you, my lady. Now, let us speak no more of it. I wish only for mirth now,”  he said before taking his drink and chugging more down.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

When Hal could barely walk after his fourth glass of wine, all of you agreed it was time to go back home. Robert and you were still functional. Thomas sober. Hal was muttering, and laughing at almost everything as he leaned over Thomas’s shoulder. It was slow due to Hal’s hobbling, but all of you made it back to the palace.

 You had gathered through the marble entrance into the halls with your rooms. Loki immediately turned around to see all of you. It was late at night, but he was still dressed and wide awake. His arms were crossed and his lips tight. 

“Oh! Green-dressed miscreant, dear bully, you! We had the time of our lives! Well- so did I! You get there every time you go there!” Hal laughed at Loki. 

Loki placed his hands on his hips, his eyes almost blaring red.

“Hal! What is this? Just this!” he questioned. His eyes fluttered over to you. “You did not…harm or do any mischief to our YN, did you?” 

“You’re the one known….known…known f-f-for mischief!” Hal said. 

“Or did he…he try to…to charm you? Seduce you?” Loki asked, looking into your eyes with a wild desperation.

“What! No!” you cried.

“Just some fun! Especially for our…our sweet lady! ” Hal said, busting into giggles.

Loki narrowed his eyes. He then charged right to Hal. The godly prince glared close into the face of the mortal one and his tone grew bitter.  

“Hal! I’ve had enough of these antics! You’re as bad as my brother!”

Hal looked up, eyes still glazed but his smile dropping. “What…how come?” he asked.

“Look at you- the crown prince and future ruler of an entire nation! Friends everywhere you go! A father who cares for you! He gets angry only because he wishes the best for you! Born to be the first most valued and wanted son in your realm! And…you waste your time whoring and theiving and frolicking around!? Your old enemy Hotspur is a fool! Just battle him and have it done with! Don’t you realize how simple it is, Hal? Yet you loiter around drinking! Will you be like this when Grendel arrives? You’re the most skilled mortal fighter I know other than Jonathan and yet you do nothing but wander about taverns drinking all night and sleeping until noon! When you can be the great hero prince of your country, like-like-:

“Like you wish to be?” you interrupted. 

Loki kept still in place, the words out of his throat. He then looked over to you and then back to Hal. Hal looked absolutely white. There was no laughter in his voice as if the drunken prince was no longer drunk.

“I will prove it, sir. Give me a chance, and I will prove it. To my father. And to you.” he promised.

Loki took a step away from Hal, his shoulders slumping. You sent out a thought since his shield was down.

“Apologize to him, Loki!” 

“You’re sounding like my mother,” was the god’s reply. 

“How are you going to go about your little plan if your own circle hates you?” you asked

Loki turned his head down, then back up at Hal who still swayed where he stood. Thomas and Robert kept looking silently between them.

“Hal…I am sorry…matters of my heart got to me,” he said.

“Well, I shall forgive you, someday…perhaps the morrow…no, it's so late, it’s already the morrow…” Hal said, his voice becoming a mumble.

Thomas helped him to his room and Loki stormed back to his.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

That next day, you woke up later than usual from the late night. The deep taste and fretting of what would become of Stella now only a quiet memory. Not that your anxiety had gone away. There was still no signal for Jonathan. Right after you finished eating, you decided practicing your fire with Loki would be a welcome distraction from worrying. So for hours, that was all you did. 

The indoor training ground was now made fire-proof, thanks to Frigga’s own magic. There was a line of targets set up as one Loki pulled it out from a corner and the other one guided him there. 

“Now, go on and hit them with your fire!” Loki instructed. His duplicate set up the last target and then faded away to mist. 

You walked before the targets. You kept your eyes square on the center of one Then you lifted your hands and released a flame with the breath. They went like arrows in thin, orange spurts. You would observe the result, then walk to the next one.

 Some missed the mark of the center. Some only got scorched on the side, as if a great creature took a bite. But it seemed… a quarter of them had a hold burned out into the center like a doughnut.

“Very well, YN….just see about that one! There is one more!” he gestured to an extra target that appeared out of thin air in his golden, magic light.

“You conjured one? Really?” you asked.

He kept the cheekiness of his smile.

“Why wouldn’t I?”

Little did he know that you had a trick of your own. You looked at the target, feeling yourself grin. Concentrating, you fixed your hand to point to its center. You shot out a flame there but as it landed on the target. Then the flames vanished. It was as if the target was never even burnt. 

A dark eyebrow of his lifted and his smile dropped.

“What was that?” he asked.

“I realized I could do something- wait a minute!” you dared. You looked back at the target. You relaxed yourself, focusing your energy on it.

“Now- light up!” you instructed.

The target burst into flame right at the center. Loki slowly grew a smile on his face watching how you controlled the timing. He turned his dark head towards you.

“May I use that phrase you dislike?” he asked.

“You may now,” you said.

“You are becoming quite the sorceress Y/N, darling.”

You gave him a proud curtsy. You felt as if your grin could reach your ears.

“Oh, thank you!” you replied.

Loki looked at the targets. He scratched his chin before he turned to you.

“In fact…you and Thomas are especially improving! The man had some strength, but knew nothing of how to fight…but I think you both are ready…” he said.

You ordered the flames to stop. And this time, the target was burnt. 

“Ready? For….for what? For Grendel?” you asked.

“No…a test.”

He gestured to have you follow outside to the courtyard. It was a bright sunny day. Loki found Thomas practicing his sword fighting with Robert. They were now moving onto blades and the clang of metal rang like bells in your ears. Hal was still hungover in his chambers. Robert was sweating heavily in his white exercise outfit.  Thomas was in his own shirt and overalls with the sleeves rolled up as they parried. 

Loki began to clap and the two paused. 

Robert wiped off the sweat from his forehead with his arm. Thomas merely got a handkerchief from his pocket and dabbed the sweat off of him.

“Why- if you think so. I’m not the one who gives them,” he replied.

The Baronet, a little flushed, looked at Loki with wide eyes.

“Thomas, Y/N, Robert went through it. Hal and Jonathan passed within minutes. So, no need to worry,” he began.

“What kind of test is it?” you asked.

“The warriors and the magicians of Asard go through to prove they have learned their training and can complete a task while fighting an enemy- it’s called the Weaver’s Cottage,” he explained.

“The Weaver’s Cottage?” you repeated. 

“What will it consist of? Someone to fight?” Thomas asked. His jaw tightened. Loki merely folded his arms.

“Why, quite brilliant of you. No wonder they call you ‘Sharpe.’ But yes! The Weaver…she…” 

He paused for effect., lowering his voice like telling a ghost story to a child. 

“Some say she was once a Death Goddess. We only know so much about her. She is blind but powerful. Senses around her. She is fond of eating flesh. Elves, mortals, gods, giants…she keeps knives with her. To cut up and devour.”

Your stomach curled.

Releasing one hand, he conjured an image of a little wooden cottage. It was made of dark wood with a chimney that produced steam. Windows so grimy you couldn’t peek in. You and Thomas stared dumbfounded at it.

“She lives here to do her never-ending spinning. She is blind. But she can hear you. You must retrieve the golden box inside without alerting her. Once you get it, you flee. If she senses you- you must battle her.”

“Is there something in the box?” Thomas asked.

“Yes. What is the prize? We never know! It changes every time!  The box even alters its shape. For some, it was a large box with a cloak inside, for others a book!” Loki explained. 

He flicked his wrist and the cottage vanished.

“What does she look like?” you asked.

Loki shrugged.

“It depends! All who go in see something different. An old woman. A little girl. A man. One’s father. Other times a beast. But you will know it’s her- for she sits and weaves. Robert- what did she look like to you?” he asked.

Robert’s hands fell to his sides. 

“An old student of mine…” he answered.

“Student, you were a teacher?” you asked.

“A professor. Taught at the medical school,” he explained briefly. 

Though part of you was very curious. Whose form would she appear as when you looked upon her? Would she change between you and Thomas and switch between two forms? You already had your suspicions on whose form she would take with you. 

“I say- you both work together and retrieve the box. It should be a little easier.” Loki suggested. 

Thomas nodded his head. “I think we can handle it. We will look after each other,” he said with a glance at you.

“I say we hurry you both there! Get it quick and over with! How would you like another little trip, my dear? Tired of the city and craving fresh air?” Loki asked.

“Alright- take us to the cottage,” you replied.

He transported you with magic over to the woods outside of the city. It felt a little crisper, and colder out there. The wind rustled through the trees. A brook babbled. Birds flitted and chirped amongst the branches. However as you walked further through on a dirt path, the birds were quieter. The trees grew in largeness to where their shade blocked out more of the sun. 

“Here- YN. Then you must rely on magic. Thomas, unless you have a little surprise for us, you have no magic of your own. You are only permitted one weapon. Seeing as how you were using a sword, would you like that?” 

“I would.”

Loki conjured a sword with an ebony-colored hilt and a sheath. The Baronet wrapped it around his waist, the sheathed sword only gently hitting against his side.

“Just go north here-I shall sit by this tree and wait for all of you. Just- cry out if you need another pair of hands. I’ll be glad to help…unless you would like me to stay,” Loki suggested.

“Really? Ready to have us walk to our deaths?” you scoffed.

You wished to call him a pig again, like before. But you found that…you could not. The world curled on your tongue, never quite escaping as easily as before.

“I said you could cry out if things were tough. Shout through your own powers, Y/N”

He leaned against a tree, folding his arms with a casual smile. 

“Unless you just want me to follow you because you like the sight of me.”

You rolled your eyes at him. You looked over at Thomas.

“Well, let us go. Which way is north?” you asked.

Loki gestured to north and both of you set out. Though there was a nervousness between you and Thomas. As if the Weaver could sense you both even from that far away. On you went, careful not to even step on any sticks even walking.

There was the sight of the dark cottage. The smoke from the chimney and the grimy windows. There were two steps to a front porch. On it was a rocking chair. It budged with the wind, creaking. There was little sunlight here. Tall oaks and their leaves made it seem darker. Only the quiet howl of the wind. Though it seemed as if it was years since anyone sat in it.

Taking in a deep breath, you looked at Thomas. He gave you a nod, his face determined and fierce.

Slowly, very slowly, you opened the door. So quiet as to not creak. What light there was spilled onto the cottage’s entrance. You could see cobwebs everywhere. It was like an old attic inside. Old bookshelves with books that had spider webs all over them. A rocking horse stood still. The horse’s mouth opened in a silent scream. Giant white blankets covered over mounds of things. The only light, besides what little could filter through the windows, was a crackling, high fireplace with a furnace ablaze. 

No Weaver to be found. But you were not going to tempt fate. 

But where was this golden box? You and Thomas began to split apart to search. Your feet heavy and slow. Making sure not to step on the wrong beam of wood. You bent down and peeked beneath the blankets. There were jars of eyeballs, human hands, and skulls. You covered your mouth to stifle a scream of shock. Then promptly put the blanket back. 

You gathered yourself to look at each forgotten belonging. The book piles. The dusty lamps. Cold from never being used. Stiff wooden chairs. No golden box. The light from the fireplace only showed so much. There was space in the cottage and the far corners were in the dark. But you would need some light to see-perhaps use your own flame as a light source if you still hadn’t found it. 

You peeked over at Thomas as he searched through the bookshelves and under the blankets of things as well. He met your eyes and shook his head.

Then, you found something glimmering in the corner of your eye. A star amidst the dark night sky. Your senses went out -and something in you itched, urged. On the wall next to the fireplace was another bookshelf. Something on it glittered. Something gold.

Walking over a few more steps, you waved to Thomas. He turned his head. You mouthed “here!” and pointed in that direction. He quietly followed behind you. Then you felt him tug at your sleeve. He pointed a hand to the other corner of the room-the dark one. 

Your heart stopped. There in the shadows, there was a hooded figure. Using a spinning wheel with a spindle that never stopped twirling. It was so quiet, you couldn’t hear her work. Her hood was pulled over and her back was to you. All the more reason she couldn’t sense you.

One step closer revealed that on the bookshelf, away from where the other books gathered dust, was a box. A golden, glittering box. Beautiful and bright. With a smile, you reached forward and grabbed it, turning to Thomas. 

 You heard The Weaver from her wheel sing softly. A feminine voice. A tune that seemed like a lullaby. 

“Let the Wind blow kindly In the sails of your dreams…”

You felt Thomas clasp your hand. You turned around and saw that his jaw dropped, yet he said nothing. His hand shook in yours. You tilted your head. What was wrong with him? The quest was done! You had it!

“And the moon light your journey…”

His head turned to face the Weaver. His breathing was shallow. Eyes never leaving the figure. You tried to tug at his other hand to go. That it was time to go! But he kept still.

“And bring you to me…”

You tugged at him. Pulled at him. Then grabbed his sleeve, ready to drag him back with such momentum that-

In your tugging, the box fell out of your hand to the floor with a clack sound. It may as well have been thunder.

Before you could reach down to retrieve it and flee, the Weaver stopped in her song, turned towards you, and lifted the hood of her cloak. You were ready to see your fiancee, his auburn curls and goatee and the small square of white at the throat of his dark shirt-braced for it-for him-

But the face was no one you knew. 

A woman. Beautiful in fact. Blue eyes. Rich pink lips. Long, dark hair so thick and luscious it cascaded down her shoulders. Dark eyebrows. Ivory skin with high cheekbones. Like a painting. She seemed to wear what was a simple white nightgown beneath her cloak.

Thomas turned absolutely white. His bottom lip quivering. His eyes blinked fast. 

The Weaver gave a small smile.

“Ah…dinner has arrived…” she said. 

[judgement-free-sideblog]

Ghosts from the rainforest

Captain James Conrad x Reader

Summary: A simple rescue mission will bring him back to a place full of nightmares, and maybe this time he could find redemption. Situated in 1975, 2 years after the events of Skull Island.

Warnings: Violence, blood, wounds, mentions of war, cursing, implied smut, smoking, angst.

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

I finally manage to write the end to this tiny fic, I hope you like it, and I'm going to start on my ideas for a Jonathan Pine adventure, but I haven't decide yet.

Chapter 7: Fever [Final]

The helicopter was already on motion, and the rescue crew that Brooks had sent for you were charging everything for the trip. The guys were excited to finally going back home, the Celebes Sea was ahead of you in the military base you were staying, and waiting in the Pacific the majestic USS Constellation  (CV-64) waiting to take all of you home.

Home? A country that had make more damage and taken everything from you, your family, and had force you to live away to mend some of the atrocities they had committed in the name of freedom.

"Not looking so charming today are we?" You said to him once he walked in your room to pick up your bags, you have finally stop the hostilities after he had offered you his shoulder to cry while you mourned Shukri on his funeral and after all the physical torture he had endured so you could safely leave Borneo.

He had been clear about letting you stay if that was what you wanted, and even when the rest of the crew asume you were coming back to USA, he knew you would have to say goodbye sooner or later, so instead of telling him all the things your heart was keeping from him you kept teasing him and pretending the chopper was not waiting for him.

"I have a minor headache love, but it's okay, are you ready to say goodbye?" He said and you noted how his temple had a few wrinkles, he was trying to smile over the pain in his head "It's a shame you don't come with us, I have a lot of things I wanted to show you" he grabbed your hand and all your alarms started to scream.

"Conrad are you okay?" Those words were all you have hoped for, however the radiant heat from his skin told you he was not exactly fine. "Dear God you are burning up" You said touching his head and looking desperately for a thermometer in your belongings.

"I like you too doctor, but why don't we wait until we get to the ship, we can share a bunk bed" He was definitely not himself.

"103° damn it Conrad!" You said, and for some oddly reason remember the night he told you about Randa and how much he complained about mosquitoes while he was dressing "Look at me, I'm not kidding, did you take Chloroquine before we leave Malaysia? I told you guys you had to..."

He nodded negative, and before he could speak he simply throw up in the nearest trash bin, making you suspect of the worst, specially since all the medicine was now gone and the only viable solution now was the aircraft carrier in the middle of the Pacific waiting for you.

"Also you have perfect legs you know that? I could spend my life sleeping on them." He kept saying things like that while you helped him to the heliport "Come here princess your prince charming needs your love" he said trying to kiss you.

"Later dear, preferably when you're not dying or smelling like vomit" you tried to stop him.

"Well you didn't mind me covered in dirt and sweat" He tried again but he stopped to scream "Reg! I love you man, you are like a son to me" and also tried to kiss the boy on the forehead.

"What happened to the Captain?" Slivko asked concerned once you help him to board the chopper while carrying his luggage and your medical bag.

"I have no idea, but I'm afraid it might be Malaria" you said bluntly and all of them looked concerned at you, while he vomited again "Do you have medical equipment here?" You asked the pilot and he only raised his thumb while you make sure he was steady on the helicopter floor, and almost didn't feel the machine take off while you tried to put an IV on his arm.

After one hour that felt like ten you could no longer see the island, only the immensity of the Pacific, and growing in the horizon the USS Constellation, even when you despised war and everything it represented the enormous carrier was enough to let you speechless, specially when a team of nurses and a doctor was already with a stretcher waiting for him.

"It's going to be ok James" you told him holding his hand while the experts rushed him inside.

"You really like men to die quite literally for you right?" He tried to joke, fighting the impulse of vomiting again, "Hey it's okay, I have to take care of you remember?" He smiled and you hold his hand trying to not get on the way of the medical staff, but he was too weak and fall asleep.

After they had stabilized his temperature, and take samples of his blood to determine the pathogen they let you in, the beds inside the medical bay of the ship were oddly spacious, and you could be sited next to him without any other person listening.

"Y/N?" He asked opening his beautiful eyes, "Hey it's okay love, I'm feeling better" He said and tried to reach for the glass of water on the table.

"Let me" You said and put it closer to him, "I know, once they identify the plasmodium they will know what is the best treatment for you, they take test and interrogate all of us, don't tell him I told you but Reles almost passed out when he saw the needle " He attempt to laugh but was still weak so he only smiled.

"Well is rewarding seen you on my dead bed, I'm quite honored, tears look oddly beautiful on you" He said and a small smile form in your lips.

"And you are still delirious" You said looking for a piece of cloth, and cold water from the sink to put on his head. "Here, try to rest, I'll come see you later" you told him but before your hand could leave his head he hold you still "What?"

"I might be dying, so you owe me at least listening me like adults" He said forcing you to stay next to him.

"You are not dying" you said trying to sound like it didn't matter and failing miserably "you are not, but fine. Let's talk" you concede.

"I'm sorry" he started contrary to what you had expected. "I had no idea how you looked before we met, and i was under no circumstances trying to seduce you to lure you back to America" you blush and regret your decision to stay by his side.

"I'm sorry too" You responded after a while "You have done so much helping me, even when half of the trouble I caused was preventable if I haven't trusted in the wrong people." You said and he hold your hand softly, he didn't want to hear about that, and you knew it so you took all the courage you have to continue. "And I'm sorry I over reacted, I am so used to people coming to me with second intentions that I just pushed you away to avoid getting hurt, and I just end up making other people hurt you"

"I'm sorry I make you come to the ship, I knew you wanted to stay" he said sincerely.

"It's okay, I have to make sure you stay alive, you know for the boys, maybe working at Monarch with you and Brooks won't be so bad"

"Well you can always run away from us in Hawaii, or maybe... we could run away together" He gave you a pleading look, and for moment you could imagine that life, keep running away, by his side, the soldier that never came home, and the idealist doctor, and keep leaving ghosts in every island, trying to find happiness apart from the world, but together. He kissed you, but this time it wasn't a lusty hunger kiss, nor passionate and angry like before, it was reassuring and you knew no matter what your answer was, he was on your side, for the first time you had someone on your side "So what do you say?"

But you couldn't answer because out of nowhere your stomach make you nauseous and you rush to the toilet to empty its content.

"Are you okay dear?" He screamed from the bed "I'm trying bloody hard to not take this as criticism"

"I'm okay, but I'm going to check your tests and start taking the pills before I end up confessing my sins on the fever like you" you said and walked out of the bathroom to saw him "We can talk later" you assure him.

You marched inside the medical office and started to look in the cabinets, when the young doctor that had received Conrad walked in.

"I'm sorry, I start feeling the symptoms and I thought it would be better if I start on the chloroquine before it gets worse" you excuse yourself.

"That would be great, if any of you had Malaria" he said offering you a seat that you take since he speak with a Texan accent and an authoritarian voice that made up from his young face "But we test all of you and what our SAS friend has is more likely a stomach flu from some bad shrimp, I was just on my way to tell him." He said and you sigh in relief, but also concerned about your own symptoms

"Oh that's great, but I start barfing too, and I didn't had the shrimp last night" you said and he took out a small file with your name that the nurses had put together earlier.

"Well it may be motion sickness, we are in a boat after all, or maybe... you told the nurse you didn't remember when was your last period?" He said looking the file.

"Well we have been in the jungle almost a month so I wasn't exactly counting" you tried to joke.

"The change of environment can trigger the vomit, or if you had sex in the past three weeks you might be pregnant" He smiled and all the weight of the world fall into your shoulders instantly. "In any case you should rest and let alone my medical cabinets, go with nurse Matthews she will give you some vitamins" he said but you were not longer listening.

No, it couldn't be that, right? You tried to convince your mind, but deep down you knew it was true, what would he think? He was a soldier, a man of the field, not a father, and you were obviously not a mother, what will happen now? Now that he wanted to run away in the world next to you, a baby had a place on that plan?.

Two days later Conrad was out of the medical bay and trying to approach you, offering you a fresh start from the afternoon you pause all those weeks ago in Malaysia.

But the stolen kisses on the hallways, and his nightly incursions on your cabin only made it harder for you to find a way to come clean about your news, even when the idea had already sink in your mind, because it was a baby, and it was his baby, how could you not be happy and grateful? Yet you haven't say anything to him.

Four days later he had spend the whole day walking on the deck with you, like if the planes and choppers were an appropriate sighting for a date.

"We'll be in Hawaii soon" He started "If you want to go out for a walk in the morning and get lost in the jungle we have to star planning now" he said and you were looking at the ocean trying to make up your mind.

"Maybe... I was wondering about the work you do at Monarch, maybe I will give it a chance" you start not sure how the whole we are having a baby situation will fit in your speech "I mean if you want to travel the world it might help to have a paying job for a while" you were nervously touching your hands.

"Of course, also when the baby comes I would like to have a proper house for him to be... or she, I don't care you know? as long as they're healthy" he said and you nodded yes.

"Yeah of course... what??" You look at him and he had the most radiant smile on his face, and he was clearly holding his laugh and apparently tears, of joy? "How do you know?

"Well nurse Matthews saw us kissing and then she complained about how Children this days keep having children out of wedlock" he said and you hide your face on your hands.

"I was really going to tell you... for real is just..." but you didn't have the words in you, and the tears were running on your face

"I know, it's fine, I mean is a little soon but if I'm honest I'm tired of running, and after all we've been trough I couldn't imagine a single person to share this experience with" He said cleaning the tears from your face.

"You sure?" You asked again, needing to hear it from his mouth.

"I'm sure, I fall in love with you when I saw you scaring local vendors in Malaysia and then fighting guerilla liders in Borneo, I even loved you when you vomit after kissing me for real, I'm completely taken by you Y/N"

"I fall in love with you too James" you said, and his expression got serious for a moment. "What?"

"Nothing, is just that I'm going to miss Prince Charming" he said giving you again the disarming smile that had started all this adventure.

The end

@damalseer

@kinghiddlestonanddixon (I hope you like the end)

[universitychallenged]

University Challenge 2020/21 Episode 15

It’s BACK! With a seamless transition between the first round, filmed months ago, and the highest scoring losers bit, filmed very recently. You’d hardly know the difference, apart from:

Something strange having happened to Jeremy P (see below)

Huge plastic screens between teammates

Contestants wearing earpieces so they can hear each other, and thus conferring REALLY LOUD INDEED

I got totes emosh, actually (it doesn’t take much: I lost it during the Strictly opening to see dancers like, dancing together); Jezzo gave a lovely introduction which highlighted the fortitude and badassery of all students everywhere. It was quite ‘we happy few’, except conjuring not lusty Henry V battle scenes but images of students trapped behind campus corridor windows with handwritten signs drolly demanding BEER for their survival. SOB.

Team Vibe:

Imperial: quite FUN and LIVELY

Exeter: quite SWEET and SHOUTY

Grandad Count: Average ages of 20 on both teams. I probably had half the knowledge, aged 20, that I have now, which means that when they were 10 years old, they still knew 20 times more than me.

Gender Diversity Count: Not good enough, but I’m just happy to see students going about their business this week like screens and earpieces are normal, so all is forgiven.

Style News: Pretty good this week! Am I right to think non-Oxbridge teams bring out more festive-wear? Captain Kohn of Imperial had a good shirt, Wong brought the tie-dye, and Captain Gravett of Exeter had a lovely yellow top or dress with bold power-sleeves. My fave, though, was Marrow’s minimalisty graphic T-shirt:

***STOP PRESS! I was wondering why her surname was so familiar - she’s only the twin sister of Marrow from St John’s, Cambridge! So. Damned. Cool.***

Cult Hero Of The Episode: Captain Kohn, my goodness! Answering questions before Exeter had breathed, before I had blinked, before Jeremy had tossed his hair out of his eyes, etc.

Handsome Person of the Episode: I dug Marrow’s unadorned beauty but Parker of Exeter was D.R.E.A.M.Y.

Horror Bonus Round: ‘Your bonuses are on astronomy: if the diameter of the earth is 12,000, the unit is kilometers; what unit is being used if the diameter of the sun is 4.64’?

Regular Music Fail By Composition PhD-owning Composer, Kerry Andrew: ‘Indicating a slow, dignified tempo, what five-letter musical direction links the second movement of Dvor–’

I was still counting ‘A-D-A-G-I-O’ on my fingers while Kohn answered ‘Largo.’ Hahahaha.

I loved the topic of the music bonus round – band’s songs sung by someone other than the main vocalist – but Kohn was so speedy that we couldn’t get there before him: ‘ABBA?’ he said, to the starter, after 0.6333 seconds of ‘Does Your Mother Know’. Jez looked quite put out. ‘There’s no need to say it so dismissively!’ he pouted. ‘It’s great music!’ Jez used to go regularly to Inferno’s in Clapham on Ladies Go In Free Night; you’d see him twerking to ‘Money Money Money.’ Fact.

Dream Bonus Question Round: 2/3 musicals, discombobulatingly. Andy was hot on the bodies of water round. Mockumentaries, 3/3.

Jezza-Watch: ‘He looks . . . weird,’ I said, before realising that this was the new batch of filming. Now we all know what he was been up to during the yawning maw of lockdown: GROWING HIS HAIR, presumably while bingeing ‘I May Destroy You’ or making sourdough whilst listening to ABBA deep cuts. It flopped voluminously either side and frankly made me worry that he’d let himself go a bit. He also had fresh glasses; he looked like the picture you upload of yourself on a cheap glasses website to virtually try on frames, except IRL.

Kerry and Andy’s Score: 29! 

Brain Food: Homemade collard soup. I know how to party.

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[villainousshakespeare]

A Forest Interlude Chapter 24 - The Missing Bride

Summary: Eleonore (OFC) discovers a wounded man in the woods near her home and seeks to heal him. Little does she know that it is none other than the heir to the throne, Prince Hal of England.

Chapter: 24 of 28

Rated E

Warnings: smut, sex fluff, angst, oral sex, fingering, hand jobs

(spoiler - don’t worry, it will all work out okay in the end)

In this chapter:   Hal confronts his past behavior with Poins, and discovers the abduction of his darling wife.

Read the entire story on AO3

@nrthmnsplbnd09 ;  @nonsensicalobsessions @yespolkadotkitty@just-the-hiddles @from-hel-i-with-love  livviedoo@hopelessromanticspoonie @arch-venus25 @caffiend-queen@dangertoozmanykids101 @kellatron55 @myoxisbroken@thecutestlittlebunbunfairy @vodka-and-some-sass @shiningloki@hiddlesholic @isitmadnessrpg​

If he clenched his jaw any harder Hal was convinced all of his teeth would break. This was not at all how he had anticipated the afternoon proceeding. The warm bath that he had so looked forward to sharing with his eager wife was bordering on cold, and instead of her soft moans his ears were being assaulted with a steady string of mindless prattle from Ned Poins.

Ned, who was by some reckoning his closest companion. Who definitely was the his most frequent co-conspirator and partner in crime. How that had come to be the case, Hal was having a difficult time remembering now, for he found the steady stream of malicious gossip and cruel innuendo falling from the other man's lips grating to him. A month or two ago Hal would have been laughing at his latest conquest of some poor, unsuspecting baker's wife. Ned had managed to convince the woman that he wanted to run away with her in order to bed her, only to deny any such plans when her husband caught them, mid tryst. Now, Hal merely felt sorry for the poor woman. Her life had been ruined simply because she had a nice pair of breasts that had managed to catch the wandering eye of a bored noble.

A blessed silence stretched as Hal quickly washed himself, regretting it was not Nell's hands wandering over his body, all soapy and searching. He gave a soft sigh at the thought, his cock half heartedly twitching, and was met with a snort of derision. Looking up, he saw Ned was staring at him with shuttered, cynical eyes.

"I'll give you this, your wife's a pretty piece," Poins said, a twist of his lips substituting for a smile, "though not, for me, enough to risk a ring. Was wedding her in truth the only way that she would open up her legs to you? If so, I hope the prize was worth the price, for to my mind she's a controlling wench."

"I'll tell you once the same I told the king," Hal said, rising from the tub, naked and dripping, and crossing to tower over his friend in anger, "I will not hear a word against her Ned. Nell is my wife, and I do love her well. You would be wise to bear that thought in mind, or this my first will see to it you learn."

"A thousand pardons Hal, I meant no harm!" Ned replied quickly, raising both hands in defense and stepping back. "I see you are much taken with her now. Though I profess to hear you speak of love, and have the words be so sincerely meant, doth hardly reconcile with my old friend."

"I do suppose you have some cause in that," Hal was forced to admit, as he snatched up a bath sheet and began toweling himself dry. "When I think now of what my life hath been, and how I so mistreated the fair sex, I do begin to almost hate myself."

"Mistreat them? Hal, I hardly would say that!" Ned laughed. "For I was near at hand as oft as not, and from the sounds you brought forth out of them, those ladies that you tumbled for a night had nothing to complain of in your bed!"

Hal cursed himself for thinking that Ned would understand what he was saying. He did not mean that he had hurt the women, heaven forbid! Nor even that he had not done his best to make sure that they came away from the encounter thoroughly satisfied. It was just that he had never given a one of them any thought once the random coupling had ended. He had never wondered if they pined for him, or if he was getting in the way of a relationship that might bring them more joy in the long term. Short of doing his best to ensure that their were no royal bastards to follow him about, he had taken his pleasure without any further worry.

"I hope that you are right, but who can say?" was all he answered now, knowing it was useless to share his thoughts with the other.

"Well, I am going now to Jocelyn's," Ned said, laying back on Hal's bed with a groan. "Her babe at last is weaned, so now's my chance. Perhaps I'll ask her for you, if you like, if she did feel disgraced by your hand."

Apparently Ned thought this a capital joke from the way he laughed. Hal managed a grimace that passed for a smile and began dressing absentmindedly. Jocelyn was a lusty woman, and ran a thriving brothel. She was not the type that Hal had been worrying over hurting. All the same, he wished Ned would show her some respect.

"No doubt you will have other things to say," Hal suggested with a raised eyebrow, "and will not need to fall back on my name."

"Oh I do not plan to say much at all! My mouth shall be much happier employed. But come, shall you go with me good sweet prince? I hear she has a new girl in her house, a redhead with an ardency to match. I'm sure the girl would count it quite a coup if she could snare a prince into her bed."

"I have no need for whores, I thank you Ned. I am, if you recall, a man now wed."

"Well yes, I know that you did take a wife," Ned looked at him in almost comical alarm, "but surely that need not affect you much. Nell need not know whereto we two are bound, tis not like she will hear it from your whore! And I should think she may think it relief that she must not see to your needs today."

"You do not mark me, so I'll say it plain. There will from now be no more whores for me. I fear you must seek for another man to bear you company in your pursuits."

"But Hal, you must be playing at some jest - you surely do not mean you plan to be a faithful husband to your loving wife?"

"Yet that is just exactly what I mean," he nodded. "Now that the gods have granted me my heart, I would not put such happiness at risk by wasting of my time with random whores or ladies who would cast themselves at me. I want but one fair damsel in my bed, and much to my eternal wonderment, that woman is none other than my wife."

Ned stared at him in stunned disbelief. Hal knew that he deserved no less, and once more felt his shame rise. He could not truly fault Poins. Even discounting Hal's reputation as a rake, very few men of his rank were completely faithful to their wives. He supposed it came with the territory when most marriages were arranged more for money and alliances than for affection. He was a man most blessed that his life's companion was the owner of his very soul.

"My lord, my lord! I must see you at once!" Cecil demanded, barging into the room in a most undignified fashion quite at odds with his usual reserved bearing.

"What is it man? Here, sit and catch you breath," he instructed as his man doubled over and wheezed.

"There is no time, her Highness, Princess Nell..." Cecil gasped out, causing Hal's heart to stop beating.

"What Nell? Why what is wrong? Sir, speak to me!" he demanded, fear like a cold finger on his spine. "Is it the babe? Has she come to some harm?"

"No, no my prince, tis not as bad as that," Cecil hastened to assure him. "A troop of guard appeared here at our gate, and did insist that she should go with them!"

"What, take her from her home? I'll kill them all! Where were our own men that they stopped them not?"

"Your grace, she went with them of her own will, for they were dressed in colors of the king, and his own sigil did bedeck their breasts! Only the gateman knew what did occur until she had acceded to their will. Poor lad, he is beside himself in fear that he did put her life somehow at risk."

Hal began littering the air with every curse he knew. There had been no direct word from his father since their frightful encounter on his wedding day, and the lack of condemnation had lulled him into a false sense of security. It had never occurred to him that Henry would do something so extreme as to send armed guards to abduct Nell from their home! What could he possibly hope to gain by doing any such thing?

"Have Strumpet saddled for me straight away," he commanded Cecil, pulling his boots on as he spoke. "I ride at once to see our revered king. I hope he has some reason for this act, as patricide is still a grievous sin. But if he has caused any harm to her, I will not answer for my own reply."

"Your horse is waiting for you in the yard. It was not hard to think what you would do."

"I thank you, Cecil. Ned, I bid you well. You must excuse me, for I now depart."

"I would not think to keep you from your bride," Ned said with an odd voice Hal could not quite place, but thought might contain humor. He supposed seeing him cast as the avenging husband might seem humorous to someone else. To himself it was deadly serious.

Cecil was as good as his word, and Hal's favorite horse was saddled and waiting for him. It took him very little time to ride to the palace. Even were he not known on sight through most of London, one look at his furious face was enough to clear all out of his path. When he arrived at the castle, he threw his reins to a random groom and stormed inside, beating a path for the presence chamber. Not waiting to be announced, he thrust open the doors and barged inside.

"Where is she sir, for I will have her back!" he hurled the words at the old man sitting on the throne like a spear.

Henry, who until that moment had been in deep conversation with his master of coin, started in his seat as though a dragon had burst into his throne room, and indeed Hal looked like one. When he realized the accosting person was in fact his eldest son, his face turned red and his eyes lit with rage. Still, his voice was clam and cutting as he addressed Hal.

"You should be whipped for lack of manners, boy. Do you not know to whom it is you speak? How dare you come before us in such state, and so abuse our royal presence thus?"

"Forgive me if I do not curtsey, sir," Hal sneered, as the gathered court looked on in shock. "Perhaps if you had not kidnapped my wife I might have time for courtliness and grace."

"Has all the sac you drink gone to your brain?" his father demanded, glaring at him. "Why, tell me boy, would I abduct your wife?"

"Why that you must tell me, for I know not!"

"And do you see her here, you foolish sot? I have not set my eyes upon the girl since I did see you both the day you wed."

"Is this the truth? You did not send for her?"

"I have no need to lie to you, you wretch! In truth I have done all that I could do to put the two of you far from my mind!"

"Then this is even worse than I did fear!"

Hal was completely lost now. When he thought that his father had taken Nell, he had feared for their future, but never for her physical safety. Say what you would about Henry, and Hal had, but he was not a threat to women. The worst he had imagined was that his father intended to ship her off to a convent and dissolve their union. If it was someone else... the possibilities were as dark as they were endless.

"What put it in your head that I had her?" Henry's voice sounded begrudgingly concerned.

"The gateman said that guards did come for her, dressed in the livery of your own house."

"Flat lies, and that you can see for yourself! Why, you have known Renaldo all your life and here he stands as he has done all day. If I had sent my men on such a task as would require discretion in to be done, as to abduct my son's wife from their home, think you I would entrust it not to him?"

Hal had to admit his father had a point. Renaldo had been with them since Hal was a boy, as faithful to Henry as he was circumspect. His father was far too fussy to allow such an act as Hal was accusing him of to be done in a way to cause talk among the public. If he had sent for Nell, it would have been Renaldo that retrieved her.

Hal's mind spun. It made no sense. Who would want to take Nell? Could it be Northumberland, angry at the cancelled wedding? Or perhaps the Earl of Kent who he had provoked at the market? He could not think clearly, not when the dearest person on the globe was in such peril.

"But said your man that they were dressed as us?" Renaldo asked now, voice sounding almost concerned as he looked at Hal with searching eyes. "What men would have free access to our garb? My men are quartered close unto the king, and only one admitted to those rooms could hope to take one jerkin, far less six"

Six. They had been dressed in uniforms of Henry's household. And their had been six of them. Slowly, Hal lowered his head into his hands and laughed an almost unhinged laugh.

"I am as foolish, Sire, as you think," he said, shaking his head. "I pray you all, forget this freakish start. I did not mean to so disrupt your day. I'll leave you now and cause no more discord."

"I am, I think, an explanation owed," Henry said in a wry voice. "You do, I take it, know who has your wife?"

"I do believe I do, and if I'm right, they shall regret the day they hatched their plan."

"Renaldo then shall go along with you," Henry surprised Hal by saying. "She is, for now, a member of my house, and as such we cannot allow insult. When you have her extracted from this mess, I will expect you all to return here. I have some words which I would say to thee."

Hal did not miss the formal tone on the end of his father's decree, but for now he had more important matters to attend to. The pieces had fallen into place, and he was reasonably certain that he knew just where he would find Nell. Heaven help the men when he got there.

[mythiica]

Hi! If you want requests, then I won't hold back !! and I'll bring flowers to your grave! 😹 So may I request some jealous/possessive Lucien smut? (No problem if we need to bath in holy water after reading it...if you know what I mean 😸)

Title: Chubby Bunny ChallengeFandom: Mr. Love Queen’s ChoiceCharacter: LucienGenre: smuttysmutKinks: masturbation, teasing, dirty talk, face fucking/blowjob, marking, possessiveness, cumshot, reverse missionary (?)Warnings: noneIntended Gender Audience: Female Audience Word Count: 2000 wordsPOV: second personOther comments: hi senpai im 5 years late but i hope u like! Merge with: 

“Who would have guessed that our favorite idol and our favorite producer would be competing in a good old fashioned game of Chubby Bunny?”  the host squeals to the camera. 

          You try to wipe the drool with your sleeve to save yourself the embarrassment of rewatching this episode later. Kiro looks the same, mouth filled with marshmallows as he tries his best to say the two words without making a fool of himself. 

         When you agreed to join him as the “guest star,” you did not expect to find yourself sitting in front of a camera playing Chubby Bunny with your best friend. 

         I completely forgot to mention that the theme is old trends! Kiro apologizes before you go live. 

         Now, the two of you are here. 

         You push another marshmallow into your cheeks and gag slightly on it before composing yourself and mouthing “Chuffy bonny–“ 

         The host raises an eyebrow at you. “I’ll let it pass! Kiro, your turn.” 

         Lucien watches this strange episode, with a slight delay, from the comforts of your bedroom. Had he remembered that the recording was happening today, he would have driven from work to the studio to watch you from backstage. 

         However, he does not really mind being at home, because it gives him the freedom to fantasize… So much so, that Lucien slips his hand into his sweatpants to stroke himself slowly. He rolls his fingers over his length and inhales sharply as precum starts to dribble from his tip. Lucien didn’t realize that he had gotten so hard from watching this mildly lewd game, but his ridge begs to be massaged. 

         Every time the camera pans to your face, Lucien imagines that your mouth is filled with his cock. Saliva slips down from the corners of your mouth, but still you continue to fit marshmallows one against another. It is truly a sight and it gives Lucien so many ideas. 

         You beat Kiro by at least five, totaling nearly seventeen marshmallows. Upon attempting the eighteenth, you gag a bit before spitting it all out.

         The white mess runs down onto the bib, only making Lucien groan louder to himself. He rewinds a bit when the audience starts clapping for you just to see you with tears in your eyes as you try to stuff marshmallows ten and eleven into your mouth. As the tension builds up in his cock, Lucien is tempted to pause the episode on your expression, but he lets it pass so that he can tuck his free hand inside his pants. Pumping his base and tip at the same time, Lucien tenses sharply, a cramp forming in his upper thigh, but he ignores it for the sake of orgasming. 

         Lucien groans as he cums, and the white of his release looks like the marshmallow concoction in your mouth. Raking his clean hand through his hair, Lucien pouts slightly, wishing you were here instead of still on the show. 

         The recording cuts to a commercial, giving Lucien a chance to clean himself up before seeing your face again. Lucien fast forwards through the host explaining the pocky game and pauses it to watch you come dangerously close to Kiro’s lips. He is well aware that you feel nothing for the idol, but he still feels a pang of jealousy and possessiveness stemming in his chest. 

         Your cheeks are a beautiful blush pink, likely from the makeup they required you wear for the episode, but it makes Lucien think about how easy it is to make you flush that color without enhancements. 

         Outside, the sound of people chattering pulls Lucien’s attention to the open window. He stands up and pulls his pants to rest low on his hips. Peeking over the windowsill, Lucien catches glimpse of your car pulling into the garage of the apartment complex. The negative emotions flutter away, replaced with happiness. 

         He waits at the door like a puppy and catches your wrist as you walk into the room. “Lucien!” 

         A smile stretches across his features. “Hello, beautiful. I’ve missed you.” Your boyfriend pulls you against his chest as he closes the door. The lock clicks into place as you cup Lucien’s face and kiss him lovingly. “You finished faster than I thought you would.” 

         “The recording is shown with an hour’s delay. And I thought you had work today.” You pick pillow fluff from his cotton shirt and smooth out the wrinkles. “I’m here now though!” 

         Lucien nuzzles against your touch and presses his forehead to yours. “You have been spending so much time with our blond friend as of late.” 

         “It’s only because I owed him a favor. He helped me last month with a last minute episode of my own show. Remember when you two played battleship?” 

         He nods and leads you to the kitchen where you set your purse down. “When I beat him badly at battleship. He’s cute, but he really does not know how to win at that game.” 

         “Be nice! He was trying to be polite.” 

         “It’s polite to lose?” Lucien teases. 

         You roll your eyes and hug your boyfriend from behind, resting your chin on his shoulder to look into the fridge. “I’m hungry.” 

         “You ate enough marshmallows and pocky to last you a week.” 

         “I had to spit them out after that challenge! I’ll have you know, I won the celebrity record of chubby bunny,” you say as-a-matter-of-factly. 

         Lucien leans back on his heels and pinches your side. “I saw, bunny.” 

         “What have you been up to?” Lucien offers you a bowl of fruit as he takes out other tupperware, trying to remember what leftovers are hiding in the back. “Besides watching me stuff my face with sugarry clouds.” 

         The smile dips into a smirk. 

         “Lucien?” 

         The container lands on the counter and a moment later, Lucien has you in his arms as he carries you to the bedroom. You giggle and wait to see where this is going, but are not expecting him to drop against the edge of the mattress and pull you between his legs. His grey sweatpants fall down to his ankles, revealing an erection Lucien had been carrying since you got home, and he brushes your hair back gently. 

         “I’ve been wishing you were here…” 

         Another fit of laughter bubbles in your throat, but you kiss his inner thigh before straightening your posture and dripping saliva onto his length. Lucien groans, savoring the look on your face. He remembered correctly: your eyelids dip down, giving you a lusty look. You’ve recreated it now, as you pump his length, making him harden more, before you lap at his pronounced ridge. 

         “You’re still wet from whatever you did earlier. Lucien, did you get off to me?!” 

         He smiles bashfully and nods as he lifts his shirt to expose his abdominal muscles. “You know the answer to that,” Lucien drawls. “Babygirl, I missed you–” 

         His words prompt you to start sucking along his length. The heat from your tongue makes Lucien shiver with joy, but you take pleasure in teasing him for too long. Lucien catches a handful of your hair to guide your mouth down. You swallow his cock and his tip rubs the back of your throat, making you gag slightly before you settle and start to pump his base. 

         This is what Lucien was missing – the lewd sounds you make every other moment as you try to fit him fully. Your lips swell as they move, but Lucien starts to face fuck you desperately, wanting to see how you would look with white painting your soft skin. 

         Every time Lucien bucks into your mouth, saliva bubbles at your lips, but you wipe it away and focus on sucking his length. Your fingernails dig into his thighs, making Lucien squirm and groan loudly. “Fuck… your tongue feels so much better–” 

         You do your best to smile as Lucien tucks your hair behind your ear. A moan rumbles in your throat, stimulating his cock even more. His muscles tense sharply and his mouth contorts in the shape of your name. Bitterness envelops your tongue, but you continue to suckle at his tip before popping off with a loud sound. 

         Lucien snaps quickly into reality and catches your chin between two fingers. “Show me.” He marvels at his cum on your tongue and prides himself in marking you. “Good girl…” 

         Sitting up, you turn to go to the bathroom, but Lucien catches your hand and pulls you on top of him. “Careful, we’re not done yet.” He kisses your throat, coaxing you to swallow the contents of your mouth, and you give in. A trickle of white runs across your lips, so Lucien kisses you deeply and takes care of it. 

         The next moment, Lucien strips you of your own clothes, discarding them carelessly on the floor next to the bed. He attacks your breasts next, circling his tongue around your nipple as you fumble with your pants to take them off. 

         “L-Lucien! Please, let me–” 

         Lucien grips your hips tightly as he leans backwards. You straighten your back and settle onto his cock – he stretches you more than you expect, but you moan gleefully when Lucien starts thrusting into you. He is quick to pull you down against his chest, but every time you try to sit back up, he presses his hand against the small of your back to keep you flushed down. 

         “Stay, babygirl, I like it when I can feel your warmth against my skin…” Lucien says this so softly that it makes your heart melt. Relaxing your muscles, you nuzzle against his chest and let Lucien buck up into you. Rolling your hips only allows him to reach deeper inside of you, until his cock hits against the spot that makes you moan loudly. 

         “Does it feel good?” 

         “Yes!”

         “Tell me more–” 

         You kiss Lucien deeply and run your hands across his bare chest. “I should have come home earlier if this what was waiting for me.” 

         Lucien grabs a handful of your ass and pulls your legs apart to fuck you faster. “At least now I get to mark you, no? Kiro got dangerously close to your mouth earlier, and I didn’t like it. These are mine~” He licks your lips and teethes on them slightly. 

         You gasp aloud and run your fingers through his hair to pull it back. He looks so good with his hair back, it makes you moan just at the sight. “I pulled back before we got too close though. Or did you get carried away doing.. other things?” you tease. 

         He grunts and slows his thrusts just to hold your face and look into your eyes. “We should do that some time, no?” 

         “I’m currently focused on this!” Grinding hard against him, you press your fingers down on his nipples and roll your hips. It makes Lucien frenetic, and the next moment you go numb from his powerful thrusts. 

         You fall over the edge of pleasure, your orgasm wrapping you in bliss. Usually Lucien likes to fuck you through your climax, but this time he pulls out and cums between your abdomens. His release is hot and sticky, as it rests against your skin. 

         Lucien smiles and laughs before shifting around so his cum spreads across your skin. “Hmm.. there, just like that. So you’re mine.” 

         Finally, you sit up and admire the mess on you. “Of course I’m yours, Lucien~” Leaning down, you press a kiss to his forehead. Lucien locks his arms around you for a hug, and once again he picks you up, but this time to carry you to the bathroom. You squeal and nuzzle against his neck, knowing that the two of you will be due for another round in the shower. 

[jchb32273]

L💖VE Yourself Challenge

Tagged by @cullenlovesmen  Thanks!!

Rules: It’s time to love yourselves! Choose your 5 favorite works you created in the past year (fics, art, music, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought into the world. Tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome works!

Well, I haven’t written as much as some FF writers here... mostly b/c I was mainly focused on my LongFic (which is still going... even though an update is long overdue...) SO! I guess I’ll start with that one!

1. Kylara's Origins - Holy crows! I just realized that this behemoth of a Fic is now almost 2 years old!! (May 13th 2020 will mark the anniversary) What started as a pet project during Alistair Appreciation Week 2018 (which, I feel we need to have another...someday! Alibear always deserves love!) has become a massive piece of Fanfiction at 368120 words (and counting!) Please don’t let its size scare you away -- it will be coming to its closure soon. I am currently finishing writing the Dalish/Werewolf arc... and will soon be moving onto the Landsmeet... then onto the Final Battle! What will happen to Kylara and Alistair? Will they get to stay together? Hopefully you will continue to read and find out! 🥰 

There are sequels planned as well for Kylara! I will cover the DAA story arc with her. DAII will be Garrett Hawke’s story, naturally, but Kylara will have some cameo appearances! She and Garrett are cousins, afterall! As for my DAI Fic... I really want to avoid spoilers! 🤫 Kylara will be there... but she is NOT the Quizzy! I won’t say any more! 

2. 14-Day DA Lover’s Prompts - A series of prompts that were given to write short stories between Feb 1st and 14th. While I didn’t finish on time, I did FINISH them, so for that I am happy! While I did have some stories with Kylara and Alistair, this time I wrote many other ‘ships, experimenting to see if I could venture from my “comfort zone” of Ali and Ky (however, they will always be my babies, no matter what! 🤗) In here, I also featured stories written for some of really awesome friends. I wrote a Cullbastian short for @cullenlovesmen. There is also a story dedicated to my super-awesome friend @andrastini (featuring art by the amazingly talented @ambellinaleander), and a short Culistair Kiss dedicated to the always wonderful @aurlyn! All in all, I was happy how these shorts turned out!

3. Camping Chaos - A short that was written for Fictober 2018. I never did complete that 31 day challenge... but this little one shot that came of it was fun and enjoyable to write! Set in a modern AU Thedas where Alistair and Cullen are college roommates, the two go on a camping trip that goes anything but smoothly!

Speaking of Fictober... 

4. Fictober 2019 - Another Fictober that I didn’t finish... BUT I WILL! 🤞 Even though it is months past the deadline, I have become quite attached to this series of shorts. Fictober is meant to be short one-shots created with prompts... but the list that was given that year actually inspired me to make it a continuous story! Yes, they can be read as separate, but each story does link on to the next. It is Alistair and Kylara... but this time set in a modern Thedas, where the entire DA gang are all in college together! I finished Day 19 not that long ago... and once I get the next chapter of my LongFic up, I will contnue to write more for this Fictober... until I finish it! 

and last but definitely not least!!

5. Seduction Aboard The Siren - The most Explicit story I have ever written! We all know in DAO that if you flirt with Isabela in the Pearl you can (under the right circumstances) have a threesome (or even a foursome!) with the lusty pirate. Except all you get in the game is a fade-to-black screen. So I took it upon myself to write what really went down on board The Siren! 💋💋💋

Well there you go. I have a few other things I’ve written, but these are my current favorites. If you’d like to join in, I guess I’ll tag @captain-savvy @anjelica-grey @samusdraws @angels767 @allenvooreef @cccrystalclear @elfrooted @aurlyn @froschkuss @ambellinaleander @shepofshipsart @greendelle @mrnicholas @effelants @freethemages @out-of-the-embers @angelfolks and anyone else who wants to participate! (If you’ve already been tagged or posted something... sorry for the double-tag!)

[deviationdivine]

Blue Blush (Connor!Prompt Request)

TLDR: Connor’s having one of those days at the DPD that just culminates in him winding up naked...

Word Count: 2,837

TW: Fluffy Boy Connor, Language, Suggestive Themes

A/N:Follower/Reader Appreciation Drabble | Prompt: “Nothing to see here.” “Um, you’re fucking naked!” - @sammyreh request! Here we go! My main man Connor’s back with more fluff to cure my chronic angst. Thanks for participating baby! 

How lovely you look today. Any day will be beneficial to his visual component analyzing each detail for memory storage. Already he has seen you first entering DPD but that does not stop him wanting to be around you approximately twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week, four weeks in a month and-

Calculations drop out of range the closer you come. Realizing that he fell into distraction reminds him of what Hank calls it. The lieutenant says he is ‘whipped’ but Connor is unsure if you would partake in the sexual gratification of S&M. Whips appear to be quite popular in the area.

A flood of information filters in his scanners. Oh. That is not what the lieutenant meant.

Wiping out a flood of sexual content he automatically steps forward with a cup of coffee brewed specifically to your preferences. “Good morning, Love.”

“Good morning, Detective.”

Your greeting is airy with a wisp of mischief. Catching him off guard is rare. After all he will hear a pin drop with that supersonic hearing. It isn’t so much surprise but confusion settling into his cute face. Then he plays off your formal address all too cleverly.

“We are much more than colleagues now, Y/N.” The android admonishes teasingly, offering the hot beverage to you. “In fact, I do believe we are dating.”

Is that so? You laugh at the little joke. Breezing past his lips husky and endearing; your body leans into his chest acting as a harmonious magnet. Tangling fingers around silky tie pulls him down just enough but directing him isn’t necessary.

Connor places a sweet kiss that quickly transforms in a sultry tango to your lips. Wanting to curve fingers with the shape of your face, cradling, claiming you as his, he does remind himself of current priority. This is work. He does not wish to cause an uncomfortable climate. Most have no opinion about this new relationship the two of you have begun.

Hank obviously rolled eyes when Connor first admitted. Actually, it was not in disgust. The lieutenant thought it was “about time they worked it the fuck out” in his usual unpleasant terms.

There is a nudge of doubt still weighing through his system. Even as you come to hold a place for him in your rapturous human heart; Connor imagines if he did not become deviant.

Never will he doubt you or these feelings. He doubts how good he truly is for someone like you. Someone who is a lively spark in this world, making him feel further human. If he may hold, protect you forever that will be enough. Even if you decide to move away from this connection for your sake as a human dating an android; Connor drops his gaze. Being free with thoughts and decisions empties his mind for only his internal voice to ruminate. At times being alone is not best for a deviant.

“Connor? Are you OK?”

Stroking his cheek draws him up in a snap. Indicator flickers in a call sign interrupting this pleasant sensation reserved only for him. He reserves for you as well. As long as you want to be with him perhaps that is enough. To hold a moment tenderly expecting an end or his days of struggle eclipse logic too severely. 

He is more adaptable than this. Having something precious to lose makes the android surge with an entire new string of emotions.

Maybe he should ask Hank. On second thought, let’s not ask Hank.  

Connor smiles now. Appeasing worry is part of his programming. He is meant to integrate in an amiable way. He still follows patterns of protocol but more so out of choice. An unmistakable need to make you happy fills him with purpose.

“I just received an emergency call,” Connor breathes against your hand. Tiny peck of the android’s bottom lip grazes palm where you continue to offer a soothing caress. Tasting the natural chemicals held within your body spiking for every touch and affectionate fondle of skin. 

“It seems I will be out in the field earlier today. And – Hank is late.”

Anderson is late? Shocking! You smirk. “Well, that’s on him,” you chide. “But still… I’d like you having backup. Do you want me to-?”

“No, Y/N.” Connor is quick to shut down the suggestion. He knows of the astonishing capability you possess. There is more at stake.

Arguing won’t change his mind. He’s pretty good at making his own decisions. It makes you happy to see him not tied down to code or orders. He’s also pretty good at this coffee thing. Sipping it now creates a warm spread.

“Mmm,” purring approval gets him going. 

Lusty clouds dot caramel cocoa, those same eclipses you notice each time kissing turns into heavy petting. Connor lets go of his pristine, intelligent personage while loving you. He takes breath away. Can only dream of how it will be when you two have sex. “Exact amount of cream. Connor, if you weren’t a detective you’d make a delectably hot barista.”

“Hey, hey, hey! Take your lovey dovey shit outside!”

Wrenching back from Connor’s warm, loving space is a good opportunity to roll eyes in disgust. You blatantly ignore the obnoxious entrance of Reed. “Be careful,” a little whisper floods your feelings. They always were like this for Connor but knowing he’s yours? It adds extra uneasiness.

He does not seem to be worried at all. That smile can light up the earth. He warms you like the sun.

“Androids are capable of avoiding unnecessary injury to biocomponents, Love. My model makes me quite effective.” Connor pulls at the threads holding your blissful laughter at bay. Poking gently, hoping to spill splendorous sound tinkling like china glass. Whenever you laugh the metal melts a bit more around his artificial heart.

You bless him with a diminutive giggle. All is right within his world then. It means everything he desires now. Deviancy opens gates, unleashing his true self. He-he wants to hold this forever along with your perfect form in his arms until the end of time.

“Gonna keep eye fucking or do your job tin can?!”

Connor’s smile snaps into a line. Drawing fingers against your waist as a silent disengagement and promise to remain safe, the prototype detective walks out of break room on a clear path to Gavin Reed.

The human detective yawns not worried. He snorts at the droid. “The fuck you looking at?”

“Opening your mouth to Detective Y/L/N will need proper adjustment,” Connor explains smoothly. “Would you like me to assist you, Detective Reed?”

Any jokes Gavin had on loop don’t make it past this plastic asshole’s balls. Getting in his face he must have a big pair of gonads! “Don’t think I haven’t forgotten your stunt in the evidence room motherfucker!”

“I’m sorry,” the prototype snipes sarcastically. “I suppose this concludes our bromance then.”

“You motherless piece of shit!”

Unfazed by the varying degrees of dirt that escapes Reed’s mouth, Connor takes a page out of Hank’s book as the lieutenant would say: “Do go fuck yourself, Detective Reed. I believe that will solve all of your problems.”

Gavin is too stunned to even harp back. That’s a first! Goddamn android saunters off like he’s some hot shot too. Anderson taught him this shit! He knows it! Well…he’ll get this prick back. Today.

“Uh, Connor?” Chris Miller’s eyebrows rise at the android. Coming in slopped up in mud and – that better be mud! “What happened to you?”

“I had a minor accident.” Explaining crisply, Connor’s perturbed affectation is due to his constant gathering of humanity. More simply put: he is pissed off. Holding up his arms did not lessen the entirety of this ruination. His jacket is completely soiled. 

“Just minor?” the officer snorts, returning to computer. “Wait til Hank sees this.” 

Ignoring Officer Miller’s amusement puts Connor on a path for locker room. A swift move that Gavin takes notice of. Removing feet off desk, Reed gets up casually before taking off in the same direction. Whistling on the way downstairs echoes in stairwell but Gavin shuts up by the time that prick could be in earshot. 

Jacket, jeans completely caked in mud, dirty liquid already seeps through white shirt. Jumping a fence into several pedestrians did not end well despite calculations. The thief in question decided to use collateral damage to slow his pursuit. Connor fell face first in a giant puddle of soggy dirt from last night’s rain shower. 

The android strips dirty clothing. Resting shoes atop bench they are remarkably unscathed. Obtaining a locker for himself is both beneficial and rewarding. He never imagined much need for it being an android. Hank was right this time. 

Connor smirks. Stepping out of aisle to enter shower stall he needs to rinse splatters of dirt from synthetic skin. 

Reed takes a peek now seeing the coast clear. “Let’s see you get out of here naked plastic prick.” Gavin proceeds to gather up the droids clothes intent on humiliating the bastard. This will stick it to him on a lesser note but he’ll sit back and laugh his ass off all the same. 

“What the hell did he fall in?!” Gavin holds the muddy pile away from himself. If he gets anything on this jacket he’ll kill somebody. 

      Wet tousled hair smoothes in a comb beneath Connor’s fingers returning to locker. He freezes, running a searchable scan. Where are his clothes? 

“Connor!?” 

Jolting around at your frantic voice floods indicator scarlet. Priming himself to jump into action and protect he steels his fluid stance. You are alone. There is no sign of any distress besides your rising heart rate. Oh.

The android peers down assessing his current absence of clothing. “Nothing to see here.”

Nothing to see? How about broad shoulders ripe for finger digging, clavicles made for flush kisses and a muscle toned body stark naked in the DPD locker room? Connor is absolutely wow. No, really. This is…what??? 

“Um, you’re fucking naked!” 

Raising eyebrows at your language does remind him of Hank. The android remains standing without sense to hide anything about his state of undress. Simply he gazes at you fondly and free of inhibitions. Obviously this is far too intimate. Even in a relationship your embarrassment is palpable. “Are you all right, Y/N?”

A breath escapes in poor answer. Frankly there is nothing to say without making a fool of yourself. It shouldn’t be this nerve wracking. After all you two have been together but not this far yet. 

Connor cocks his head with a tiny smile. Obviously it does not bother him. However, he does not wish for you to feel uncomfortable. “I apologize. Would you like me-?” 

“Connor.” Pressing a palm to his chest stills the entire world. Bare and chiseled just as his sharp cheekbones, sculpted jaw he is a beautiful statue. He’s an ancient work born out of Greece. Tall perfection making you weak in the knees fully clothed. Without you need to start fanning yourself before passing out. 

Keeping eyes up is difficult. You swallow. 

Your touch melts him into you, eyelids drifting in a flutter. His eyelashes are like snow kissing against yours when he leans in to overtake lips. Right now he quietly stands absorbing closeness. Somehow you think this vulnerability eases him and how can you complain?

Cyberlife be praised. They were good for something at least. You giggle. Reaching up to cup his face pulls his head to meet your level. 

Connor’s lips mimic yours touching softly at first. Arms thread to the warm curves of your body. Pulling you flush produces a shared groan into your mouths. His LED is ablaze, frame shuddering pleasurably into your figure. 

Ohhh. You can feel him pressing fully into your groin. 

“Connor.” Bracing hands against the android’s bare chest establishes more. This type of intimacy is new. Wanting it is a personal truth but down in the locker room of the DPD? 

“I realize we have not had this opportunity. Removing our clothes for one another.”

“No,” you agree quiet. “We-we haven’t.” 

“Does it bother you?” Worry replaces lust in your android lover. “If so I will-”

“Connor, nothing in the world involving you would ever make me uncomfortable. Besides, I love what I see.” 

The android grins crookedly. Sweeping you close to show you everything he will offer. His back collides with lockers allowing you power over him. It is a silent turn on for the android known for dominating in combat. 

Tender kisses raining over your lips as stardust. Connor is a star. He’s your star. Glowing forever in your heart and this is the only thing. 

“My Heart,” he whispers into the sweet crook of neck. His tongue traces skin tasting what he loves most in this world. 

A dangerous shiver causes a soft moan to slip. Tracing fingertips down his perfect torso creates a light shade of blue. Shimmering in a blush to synthetic skin, you gasp, smiling up at him. 

“What the fuck!” Reed nearly throws up finding you pressed up against that plastic shithead. Like he needs to see a human and android fucking! 

Wrenching back from your boyfriend leaves a serious problem. It’s pretty obvious since there’s nothing in the locker. You sneer already suspecting! “Get the hell out, Gavin! Better yet. Get Connor’s clothes you asshole!” 

The detective snorts. Crossing arms over his chest, he takes one good look at this fucking shit and doesn’t bother hiding disgust. Fucking androids. Now they’re over here stealing humans for themselves. What a joke. 

“Didn’t take the plastic prick’s shit.” Reed denies but pulls off a cocky smile. Let’s see you prove it. “What? You gotta problem with your robo boy’s package? Ain’t got one?” 

Connor sidesteps from behind you without care. He throws a hot glare onto the human.

“Ah, fuck!” Gavin turns his head. “You son of a bitch! I didn’t need to see your dick!” 

“Certainly were interested enough to bring it up though.” You sneer at the idiot. Can somebody fire this scumbag? “Does that answer your question? Oh, that’s right. You’re embarrassed. Because my boyfriend is obviously way bigger than your teeny pencil dick.” 

Honestly, you know this boy is nice. You saw with your own eyes. Accidentally but knowing what’s in store for later is nice. Better than nice. 

“What the fuck did you…?”

Connor moves in front of you purposely aware of Detective Reed’s disgust. That is why the android smiles.

Gavin throws in the towel. “Jesus Christ! Go ahead and fuck him down here if you want. I’m out!”

Saying there isn’t satisfaction in Reed squirming like the scummy worm he is would be lying. You did enjoy watching him lose it. The filthy comment out of his mouth is so expected at this point nothing phases. Not even Connor still naked as the day he was created. This vantage gives you a direct view of his toned ass. Talk about sculpted perfection.

“Connor.” Calling for him to turn around, averting eyes to save your life, you reach to snag onto his forearm. Bringing the nude android towards lockers the idea is simple. “Um, wait here. And I’ll find where that jackass took your clothes.”

“Y/N, wait.”

Catching onto your waist stills everything. His voice is uneven. Checking his LED it’s not crimson but amber. What is he thinking?

“Then you do not mind seeing all of me.” Hesitation poisons his statement. Part of him does not want the truth. If you do not believe he is worth you- “As this. As my true self?”

A gentle smile answers in place of words. What can be said that is good enough? He is everything in your world. Can that be enough? Of course it is. Love is whatever you want it to be. This is what you want it to be.

“I know your true self. This.” You rub fingers across his chest. Beneath synthetic skin it’s easy to know what he is but that is what you love. All of him no matter what others see.

You indulge firm hands resting on hips. Thankfully deviancy means being bolder. He’s still a cinnamon roll though. Cinnamon roll that can kill you but still fits. “I only see you, Connor. Skin, no skin why should that mean anything? When I love you?”

The android is flooded with readings. Listening, analyzing each hastened beat of heart radiating out of you. Those beats are erratically for – him.

Connor’s smile transcends beyond that cheap grimace that used to twist his mouth. This is bright. Vibrant in humanity, dimples and pride knowing he can have what he wants.

“My Heart,” he pledges an oath. “I love you too.”

That pet name is going to make you drop. Who knew androids could be this romantic? You clear your throat, pointing down but keeping eyes on his. “Want to put that away now?”

“Oh. Obviously.”

Tag List: @elydith  @your-taxidermy  @tropfenlady  @connorswink  @tommy-10-k

[quidfree]

All 12 months. ((if I'm allowed to do that.))

hahah holy shit you sure are

january: the first fic i posted this year- my niche good omens fic! the idea just would not leave me until i got it out of my system lol

feburary: have i ever written or received a holiday fic- categorically not! maybe my fics are just too long and character-driven for cute holiday fluff ?? i would certainly enjoy taking a crack at any of the old staples of hallmark movies... maybe if i get requests for anything specific. ALTHOUGH i just remembered i did once write an embarrassingly popular malec (tmi) fic set around a shitty family christmas party, if that counts.

march: do i listen to music while writing- i listen to music while doing literally everything, hahaha. today i was writing my legal dissertation while cycling through my liked songs, so i may have subconsciously gotten some elton john/childish gambino/moulin rouge soundtrack in there. i tend to avoid musical soundtracks for fic writing, though, the dual dialogue gets distracting.

april: have i ever written crackfic- yes! when i was maybe 14? it was for hetalia (dark times) and essentially was a parody of all the bad fanfiction i saw at the time on fanfiction dot net. it was very popular. i don’t regret it.

may: have i ever regretted writing a fic- oh boy have i ever. ive been writing fic since i was like thirteen and anything i wrote preceding the last four years makes me cringe to even look at. it’s not as bad as a lot of other stuff and i thankfully never wrote anything really gross or smut or whatever, but i’m my harshest critic and tweenaged writing is never good, so. i did once regret a fic right after posting it, too! when i was in my hetalia phase i once wrote a fic involving some fanon characters and one character was sort of the baddie of my story (got punched by main chara etc)- as it turned out said character was someone’s oc and they lost their shit about it. i had a panic attack about it and apologised profusely until they generously let me off the hook, but looking back i was like 13-14 and i think they were 20+ so that was pretty embarrassing for them lol.

june: have i ever written/posted a marriage fic- no! arranged marriage is actually a trope i quite enjoy when well-executed (i like the politics), and i’d take my shot at a “fake date to a wedding” or “we met having a terrible time at a wedding” fic but i’ve never written it. i wouldn’t write a straight-up marriage fic, i don’t think- it’s a little saccharine (read: boring) for my tastes lmao. unless some other shit is going on behind the scenes/we get a rotating cast’s perspectives on it maybe.

july: the hottest fic i ever wrote/do i write smut- i do not write smut! no moral objection, it’s just a line i draw in the event of my fic somehow coming to light in my everyday life. tragic, though, because had i written terrible smut i might’ve actually stood a chance at getting a movie contract. or mass fandom acclaim. contingently i don’t have much hot content to review- i write a lot of making out but no further. i guess maybe the gomens fic solely bc one of the characters is a demon and thus quite lusty so a fade to black was needed.

august: are any of my fics associated w a certain genre/artist/song- not... really? ive never been a song-fic type of gal. i’m a sucker for the classic song title, though, and whatever song is in the title fits the fic in mood and lyrics, so maybe that counts. i do usually have abstract playlists for all my favourite characters/relationships.

september: share a fave review i’ve gotten- i actually have a whole document of these saved on my laptop, though i don’t look at it often. very leo of me. said list includes everything from the jokingly intense (“i want to print this fic out and eat it”, “i would die for your writing”, “when i die i want to be buried in this fic”) to the memetic (“i would read anything you write including weather reports”, “this is like that one lady gaga meme thats like talented brilliant incredible”) to the sincere (“i downloaded the pdf and listened to it while driving”, “this is heartachingly lovely”, “ive sent screenshots of 50% of this to my friends”, “this was beautiful and very strange”) to the thoughtful analyses of my writing techniques and choices. the latter in particular hold a special place in my heart, but really any comment that manages to convey the emotional response / literary analysis of the reader is special to me. i think in total ive probably received around 2000 comments on my works and i appreciate ‘em all (except this one person who had the audacity to critique my authorial choices on the 17th chapter of a fic).

october: name the spookiest/darkest thing ive ever written- hmmm, hard one! spookiest is easy bc i wrote a haunted house bnha fic (“damn if these walls could talk”) a while back, but it was mostly a black comedy. darkest... idk. depends what qualifies as dark. a lot of my fic have characters put through the wringer somewhat, but in a relatively grounded manner- there’s no gratuitous torture porn and whatnot. le mot vagabond (my marauders epic) might qualify solely because the setting is so dire. i like to make my characters suffer, but i always give them a happy ending, like they’ve earned it. wishful thinking maybe.

november: any rituals to get me in the writing mood- none! my main writer’s block comes in three forms: 1) other more pressing obligations (academia for the most part) 2/interruptions (familial esp- hello quarantine) 3/ procrastination. if none of those three are at play i will happily spend whole days writing.

december: have i ever written a gift fic- yes, but just the once! any french readers feel free to read my incredibly niche fic for les faux-monnayeurs, a mid-century modern french classic, which i wrote upon finding a remarkable reworking of another set text from the french literary high school curriculum (and gifted to the author of said work). and then sometimes i write things for my friends which are technically gifts i suppose.

that was v fun and probably the most personal ive ever gotten on here lol; ty for asking and i hope this sates your curiosity somewhat !