#Use your words

[catgirlwheels]

Send some of them!

Heart full of unsent messages

[the-medieval-husbands]

Arthur wants merlins attention but refuses to directly ask for it.

Merlin: Arthur......

Arthur: yes merlin?

Merlin: Would you please stop trying to light my head on fire with your mind and use your words? I can feel you staring at me.

[functioning-minne-holic]

"What does a girl have to do to...?"

Use your words.

[milkhund]

Selectively mute sub 🤝 "Use your words" dom

[lady-stardust1972]

the only thing reading marauders fanfiction has taught me is that teenage boys are fucking dramatic oh my god

[fairestbeard]

Does Richie even know he struck gold here?

"Just crush the ever living shit out of this motherf_cker!"

[aestariiwilderness]

Crosshair, every season: *providing critical information or context waaaaaaay past when it would have made a difference in the game* This is a hilarious facet of his personality. Utterly aggravating. I love it. Hunter: "CrossHAIR!" Crosshair: "what" Hunter: "THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN GOOD TO KNOW LAST YEAR" Crosshair: "You didn't ask" Hunter, voice pitching up into glass-shattering levels of utter indignation: YES I DID. YOU WERE THERE CROSSHAIR. TECH HAS IT ON VIDEO CROSSHAIR If anybody had taught Crosshair to use his words at any point in his development...canon would have gone a lot differently. Just sayin'. P.S. This means him and Tech are absolutely two sides of the same coin, except Tech genuinely doesn't get -- like a lot of smart people -- when to assume people have the background information they need and when to assume he needs to explain things. Crosshair's just a drama queen who hates having to justify his bat-crap crazy decisions to anyone :D :D Either way and either brother...Hunter can never win :D.

Tech: I thought it was obvious Crosshair: You didn't ask Hunter: I hate you both

[beccawise7]

[acurtist]

It's not glasses,

It's spectacles. 🤓

Double-take. 🥲🫣

[dangerouslyinlust]

I love telling sweet girls to just use their words as they struggle.

-JustSpeak

[norriszn]

>:(

[no-goodbyes-no-regrets]

i get the feeling Ryan's contract is this

[gingergofastboatsmojito]

His avoidance

I read this quote a few days ago and it reminded me of these two:

Source: Marriage.com YES! MARRIAGE DOT COM LOLOLOL!

So since I already went over her avoidant behavior 🔗 that might have as well cost us SYDCARMY this season:

Now I am gonna be fair because Carmy is avoidant too but differently. They are like "50 shades of I DON'T WANNA DEAL WITH MY FEELINGS, I RATHER COOK".

And in the bonus track, I will focus on the only great part of being a master avoidant.

So, Carmy... His avoidant behavior is a different shade of avoidance because while also being a defense mechanism, it is rooted in his C-PTSD, which he described in the AA meeting S1 monologue pretty well. He grew up in a totally different environment than Syd 🔗 but he also felt lonely and that scared him emotionally.

Avoidance resulted from that emotional scaring process that affects him even to this day. C-PTSD and PTSD are not the same, so it's important not to misdiagnose the two. Also, C-PTSD can cause autobiographical memory gaps but it only affects functional memory.

That being said, Carmy is extremely self-aware because he is an introvert. My theory also includes his AUADHD type, but I will not dive into that neurodivergency in this post, I will focus on his introverted type and avoidant behavior. That self-awareness is what differentiates him the most from Sydney who is an ambivert (extra-introvert). She defaults to denial, and he defaults to sublimation.

I went over his sublimation several times:

Here 🔗

Here 🔗

And here 🔗

Yeah... I gave it some thought ok?

Carmy doesn't avoid feeling, he avoids acknowledging, but he's not in full-on denial, he just dances around an idea, a concept he's fully aware of, and then decides to disregard it thinking that by doing so it will disappear. It doesn't and then it becomes ART.

It becomes ANGER.

It becomes INSOMNIA.

Just like in Syd's case, it becomes PANIC/ANXIETY.

It becomes ADDICTION.

It becomes silence that feels like something crashing his chest and not letting him say the words he wants to say OR cry. It becomes PARALISYS.

And he runs away from it by cooking or sketching, smoking, etc. Instead of facing it even if it hurts, elaborating on it and letting it out verbally, crying his heart out if necessary, and eventually healing.

I am positive that ended in 03x10 when he was strong enough to confront his nemesis and then have a good cry, finally!!! I was sooo happy for him, it broke my heart, but I was happy. He's finally on the mend.

Carmy will continue avoiding feelings he doesn't feel ready to cope with, deflecting and diverting to other stuff to fool himself, sure!

But this will not traumatize him anymore.

He will go about it differently now that he can let out certain things that were stuck in him for far too long. This will also enable other "un-stuck" processes, such as finally leaving C behind after having an adult conversation / giving that relationship the closure it deserves, which he has been avoiding since last season.

But for that, he will have to quit avoiding the reason why he stalled it in the first place, which I explained → here 🔗

I am sure S4 will be all about that because that's exactly where he ended last season, so it's the logical progression:

I bet everything on his success.

Avoidants are masters of the unspoken communication

Bonus track: Both Carmy and Syd are masters of unspoken communication, that's also why they end up overdoing it, they end up abusing that skill they have and it turns counterproductive. But it is a skill nonetheless. THOSE LOOKS, THOSE SILENCES, THAT UNSPOKEN LOVE, THEY CAN SAY IT ALL WITHOUT PRONOUNCING A SINGLE WORD OR BETWEEN THE LINES OF THE FEW WORDS THEY SAY. THEIR TRADE MARK. THEY MASTER SILENCES AND INFLECTIONS LIKE NO OTHERS. THEY CAN SAY IT ALL "DIFFERENTLY".

They got this. Let's give them more time. S4 is gonna be all about them learning to use their words "properly" after they stop avoiding the conversation they owe each other.

Remember to follow my tag #Gingerpovs 💋

[lover-of-mine]

It's like I said, Buck never entertained the possibility of Eddie loving him and Eddie doesn't think he deserves more from Buck and all could be solved if they just fucking talked to each other.

[bowlingforgerbils]

I finished reading Moby Dick!

Today was the final post from Whale Weekly, which has been sending me emails from my friend Ishmael for the past two years. It was an enjoyable experience. I'm sad that it's over, but proud that I finished it.

Considering how often stories are created bringing together fictional characters from different works (e.g. League of Extraordinary Gentleman), I wonder if Ishmael has been tossed into any of them.