#and again. this is not even. the horror that is []. which is also very very evil.
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fullmetal alchemist fans should watch the 2003 show in its entirety and here's why
@hareofhrair replied:
You know I don’t think I ever actually watched the end of that series? I watched part of it as the dub came out in the US when I was young, then when I wanted to revisit it everyone pointed me at brotherhood. This makes me really want to go back and watch 03 again. I remember really enjoying what the early episodes set up, because I was so annoyed by how much Brotherhood rushes through them— which I get, they didn’t want to spend a lot of time retreading what the original already covered and wanted to skip to where the story really deviates— but it still makes me feel like the ideal watch order for Brotherhood is like, the first ten episodes of 03 and then skip the first 4 of Brotherhood lmao. (Thats a guess without looking up the actual episode numbers of course). Anyway, thanks for the reminder that this show was real damn good and I should go watch it again!
Hi, it’s been a while but I hope you don’t mind if I reply to this and make my reply to dispel some common myths I often see around fma 2003 by brotherhood and manga fans, and try to gently coax you into giving the full show a fair go in a relatively spoiler free way
(also forgive the autocorrect/capitalization, I am writing this on PC with no internet and then copy/pasting it)
So here’s the thing: you mention here how it’s better to watch the first few eps of 03 and skip to Brotherhood. There’s a common claim I’ve seen in the past few years about fma 03 being a better adaptation of the manga in its early chapters (put a pin in that) while Brotherhood brushes over these chapters bc it expects you to know that part already. Here is my big hot take: no, actually. I think it’s a huge mistake to encourage people to watch either show this way, and even as someone who isn’t a fan of brohood or the manga, I think this way of watching is a severe disservice to both adaptations AND the manga! Let me explain my reasoning, and then why I think it is absolutely worth watching fma 03 anyway
So first of all, while it’s true that brotherhood genuinely does a terrible job of adapting the manga’s early chapters (I give a lot of shit to the manga but imo one of its strongest elements is its pacing and slow trickle of flashback and information over time), I dont think that 03 is a good substitute. Why? Because from episode 1, it makes choices that don’t just diverge or do tangents (or “filler”) compared to the manga, but that DRASTICALLY reframe the characters and tone in ways that are simply incongruous with any version of the manga. Put simply, it is not possible to follow Ed and Al and Scar and co in 03 for a few episodes and then switch to Brotherhood’s version of them without noticing vast differences in their presentation and arcs.
And this is the case from the very first minute of 03, in which ed and al are about to do human transmutation! In the manga, that choice is framed as a decision the brothers make together enthusiastically and naively, trying to bring their mom back and unaware of the horrors they’re about to stumble onto. By contrast, the very first few lines of Ed and Al in 03 are ed reassuring a deeply concerned Al that this is the right choice and nothing bad is going to happen. The Elrics’s choice in the manga and brotherhood is a childish stumbling into the eldritch, which kickstarts their arc of self-knowledge/understanding. The Elrics’ choice in 03 is directly an act of hubris and wrongness, a genuine sin that haunts them from beginning to end and is framed (not just in this moment but in near all other flashbacks) as Ed wanting to spitefully prove he is better than his dad, while Al worries but follows him and fails to stop him or stand up to his brother. Their act has far more reaching consequences than it does in the manga/brotherhood too; it isn’t the catalyst for growth or maturity, it is a visceral trauma they struggle to cope with and that will never truly be fixed. Likewise, Scar’s first appearance in 03 isn’t his intimidating killing of Tucker and Nina; he first appears as a traumatized and troubled man searching for the meaning of his brother’s sacrifice, looking more vulnerable than he ever does in the source material. His arc takes a completely different path, but his framing is also different. This early choice means that even when scar eventually does attack the Elrics, he is already a lot more sympathetic: we see him think and understand in real time what his arm is and why he wishes to use it to put an end to state alchemists. His relationship to the Elrics differs significantly as well (again without going into spoiler territory), with the show directly and verbally reinforcing the parallels between the protagonists and Scar and his brother, and Al finding a lot more kinship with Scar than he ever does in the source material.
I’m using these early examples, to kinda show why then switching to brotherhood doesn’t work. It is very hard to follow the Elrics and Scar in early 03 and then switch to brotherhood and still have a coherent arc. For one the events differ significantly! But also I can imagine the sheer confusion of someone when suddenly, the Elrics find no real affinity to Scar, when Ed finds out the human transmutation created nothing but a shell, and hell, even in the switch between how emotional and traumatized Ed is in 2003 versus the much more self-assured version of Ed in mangahood (who I know has his own insecurities, but frankly the difference is night and day). I’ve mentioned it in another post, but to put it bluntly, while manga/brotherhood Ed is meant to be a fun shounen protagonist the audience grows with and enjoys seeing him maturing, 03 Ed is not that. He is from beginning to end a deeply flawed protagonist, the narrative pointing out the blind spots in his vision constantly. 03 Ed’s growth is not a straight curve up: he regresses, he stalls, he sometimes purposefully and stubbornly refuses to face realities staring him in the face, he makes choices that infuriate the audience and other characters not because he is a genius but because at heart, 03 portrays him as a traumatized child soldier who wants to believe in the same kind of upward learning curve and universal justice the manga believes in, but who is proven wrong at every turn before he finally has to swallow painful truths. He is deliberately not a shounen protagonist, because fma 03 is not actually a shounen.
I do not mean this as a disparagement to shounen or to gloat HES NOT BC SHOUNENS ARE BAD, I mean that fma 03 genuinely does not fit the narrative structure and genre conventions of shounen. There is far less action than in brotherhood (in part, let’s be honest, because the creators had very little budget): the fight scenes tend to be sparser and much faster and end in subterfuge or a quick, brutal end. There is a lot of talking, a lot of politicking and worldbuilding---but not in the same epic way as mangahood, a sprawling and exciting tale and unravelling conspiracy. Fma 03 is not interested in making this a world saving epic, quite the contrary. It’s a deeply personal tale about a cast of people whose main goal is not saving the world but learning to accept loss. That’s the core of 03. It isn’t about saving the world from Father or God, it isn’t about unravelling the main conspiracy (there is a conspiracy but it is very different in nature, more personal and banally evil, with a very different take on who is at the end responsible for the atrocities committed by and for Amestris)—it’s about learning the nature of the world and how small our part in it is, and yet how crucial it is to accomplish said part. There is no big masterful showdown to save the planet: all the showdowns are personal, bittersweet, deal with the structures of this world that the Elrics cannot just punch in the face.
Ok, you’re gonna say. So fma 03 is not an adaptation of the manga. It is unfaithful to it and doing its own thing. But I like the manga’s story, I love it! Why would I watch a story that takes the characters and ideas I like but does something entirely different with them that is incongruous with what I like about fma? Why didn’t the creators make their own original story instead of twisting Arakawa’s plot and characters?
Well first of all, 03 IS an adaptation of the manga—in the same way Annihilation is an adaptation of the Southern Reach first book. 03 doesn’t ignore the manga, quite the contrary. In many ways it’s a reimagining of what the creators of the show thought was most interesting in the manga that Arakawa chose not to do much with. It does adapt some crucial moments. It recognizes Arakawa IS good at creating really powerful moments and images (Nina as a chimera, Ed digging up his mother’s grave, and more). But 03 chooses to recontextualize those in the context of its own themes and interests. The creators for example zero in on human transmutation and its meaning and consequences far more than Arakawa does; it is far more critical of the military structure at the hear of Amestris and, crucially, the everyday people who are a part of it and the results of their casual and thoughtless participation in fascist policies and dehumanization of those deemed “other” (including Ed himself!). It also focuses a lot more on grief and how it unites people and tears them apart; how people are willing to delude themselves and cause so much harm in pursuit of a person, a value, anything that they idealize and wish to have (again) even when that idealized thing is gone or never even existed. These aren’t things that didn’t exist in the base manga! 03 just chooses to focus on them far more sharply and critically. Often, it answers some of the manga’s ideas directly with refutation or nuance. So 03 is absolutely an adaptation, a transformative work that uses the bases Arakawa planted and takes them to their extreme logical conclusion. I think at the very least it might be interesting for you as a manga/brotherhood enjoyer to meet it where it’s at in that respect: not to see its changes as being “unfaithful” but as being their own creative take that’s worth exploring on its own.
FMA 03 to me, personally, is also just an excellent anime in its own right: it feels tonally and thematically unique even among other animes of the time, and it was recognized as such by people who’d never read the manga! Its exploration of military as a completely corrupt power structure that cannot be saved feels more relevant than ever, and so does its musings on grief and identity. It is a mature and thoughtful work, with such a strong clarity of vision that’s worth checking, despite being marred by terrible production and some stupid choices (including a transmisogynistic serial killer episode 8 that is genuinely sour and awful, and a later “joke episode” that likewise features some transmisogynistic tropes and should be skipped entirely).
Alright, you say, warily and squinting your eyes. But I thought it first adapted the manga, and then went bad in the second half, when they stopped being able to adapt the manga? Well, yes and no. The first half has some of the early manga moments, yes, as well as the Elrics’ backstory, but in a completely different order both narratively and chronologically. For example, the show decides to spend a lot more time with the Elrics passing their state alchemist exam as children, and features the meeting with Nina and Tucker MUCH earlier in their life (they are 12 and 11 as opposed to full on teenagers). The Elrics’ backstory is revealed in a single episode in episode 3. The train hostage situation takes place much earlier in their timeline too, and there are other changes to the timeline, as well as added “filler” episodes and moments (that frankly range from p good to dogshit) that unfortunately stand out. But apart from these “filler” moments/eps, the show’s adaptation of the Elrics’ past and the early parts of the manga are truly excellent both as stand-alone anime AND as adaptation, deepening a lot of the emotions and characters.
As for the second half… the truth is, the first half (that follows the manga still, albeit loosely) sets up everything the second half runs with. On a rewatch, you see early on the foundations that 03 later comes back to explore more thoroughly, the shape of certain character arcs, the chekhov’s guns and hints as to what’s to come. So why does the second half have such a bad reputation? Well for one, bc a lot of people didn’t bother to engage with what the first half says and just see a sudden drastic departure from the manga’s plot and go “this is bad and clearly filler since it’s not following the manga”. But also there’s a genuine truth in there: the second half of 03, as ambitious and interesting as it is, suffers hugely from its production restrictions—the number of episodes given to wrap up the story kept switching, with the team ending up getting one less season than planned and being ordered to simultaneously begin production on the sequel movie (whose script was written in v little time and had to be constantly cut) which was supposed to be a lot more shounen and action and fanservice in tone to attract fans in cinemas. The budget and time restrictions show; there are many times in the second half of 03 where characters get incredible scenes, but you can tell the creators didn’t bother much with connecting them logically besides “we need some random event to cause x and y characters to suddenly meet to have a Scene”. You end up with some very silly justifications as to why x is now on the other side of the country to coincidentally bump into y. the pacing is, frankly, an utter mess too. Due to the changes in plot and the production issues, a number of plotlines and arcs get…. Dropped, halfway through (no other way of putting it). Ok, so it’s bad, you tell me. No, it isn’t! it’s messy and flawed and kinda groanworthy but here’s the thing: what the team does manage to do is so GOOD. Even when the show is stumbling from scene to scene with poor logical connection, the thematic and character progression remains incredibly consistent nonetheless! The show’s vision is clear to the end, it stumbles on its broken legs but it never stops trying to reach for its clear end goals. If you are willing to meet it partway, it’s incredibly engaging and layered stuff.
You’ve probably heard about the ending, a lot of people joke about it absentmindedly or take it out of context to go ISNT IT WEIRD AND CRAZY. If you haven’t, I won’t spoil you. If you have, I’ll say that if you’ve actually followed the show’s meat and threads, what it does is sure… bold, to put it mildly, but imo it’s actually perfectly consistent with the show’s ideas and makes a fascinating point. The finale’s biggest issue that is simultaneously its greatest strength is that it suddenly throws dozens of fascinating revelations, some of which recontextualize the entire show, all in a runtime that doesn’t allow it to actually explore these ideas beyond DAMN THAT’S FUCKED. I think on a rewatch it works more strongly, bc these ideas don’t come out of nowhere and they are actually p cleverly foreshadowed and in line with the main themes. On a first watch, if you haven’t been really engaging with the show, it can be baffling and even hilarious, or infuriating. And like, I do think it’s fair to say “I do not like these final twists, bc with the lack of time and dropped plot/character threads, they just make the finale feel strange and unfinished.” That’s fair! I suggest you keep that in mind and still give it a try. You might hate the finale, or be as fascinated by its final ideas as I remain.
Finally, I think you as a fullmetal alchemist fan ought to watch fma 03 if only to appreciate its art direction and palette. I think brotherhood looks and feels incredibly flat and boring, it has a lot of budget for fights and cool animation but it just isn’t very visually interesting. 03 has far less budget and time, as said before; but I still think that visually it is the best the fma characters and world will ever look. The shapes of the faces/eyes and characters are really appealing and the animators do an incredible job at microexpressions and fleeting bits of emotion upon someone’s face to convey unspoken feelings and bitten back/buried pain. The colour palette is just…. Gorgeous, no other way of putting it; it’s darker in general, but the show absolutely loves to make use of sunsets/sunrises to showcase the characters in contrast and chiaroscuro, setting a distinctively bittersweet and melancholic mood. A lot of the choice of shots even in episodes with v little animation budget still give the show so much personality and helps you forget how stiff it can look. The audio too is worth a check: I’m not a dub afficionado but I’m told it is very very very good and I do really enjoy its script; the Japanese voices are incredible and Romi Park as Ed is stunning—her Ed feels like he ages and becomes more and more exhausted, losing his energy and stubbornness to become acceptant and jaded and wise. And more than anything, any fma fan worth their salt must MUST listen to its incredible soundtrack; Bratja is still one of the best themes composed for any anime and I stand by it. Brotherhood is genuinely much poorer an experience through the absence of Bratja.
So here’s my plea: if you’re an fma fan who’s heard of 03, either as “it’s bad don’t watch it” or “it’s really good but you should stop it at x episode and then just switch to brotherhood”, I beg of you to give the full show a chance on its own, wrinkles and all. Its lows are low, its quality isnt as consistent as brotherhood and its pacing is wonky! But the highs are so high, so consistent and so unique that if you’re fine with flawed, interesting little works of media you will be fully sated. Hell, even as an fma fan I think you might appreciate how smart some of the recontextualization of classic moments are, and how maybe we should let more adaptations get a chance at doing their own thing and be genuinely transformative rather than copy paste the panels 1:1.
(ps dm me if you struggle to find where to stream the show or download it! it currently isnt legally available in most regions)
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PSA about elegantkittyballoon’s PSA about dreamerdrop

elegantkittyballoon is the two-days-old throwaway account of the creepy anon (or group of anons?) who has been harassing and stalking dreamerdrop for like a month. They probably made it when they got sick of all their anon asks being ignored/debunked. Every round of anon callout posts that this troll sends out dramatically increases the severity of the claims against dreamerdrop (while continuing to provide no proof whatsoever of actual wrongdoing), seemingly because they didn’t get the kneejerk outrage that they wanted from the fandom in the previous round (well done, fandom, for not falling for their shit!). I'm putting this post in some of the same tags as their callout post was put in.
For some more context, here are some posts where actual hero @a-most-beloved-fool debunks all of anon’s initial concerns from the first round of anon ask callouts one-by-one: post 1 and post 2.
Their callout post (which I am hesitant to even link to because the accusations they make are so upsetting and so inaccurate) is counting on you not clicking any of the links to “receipts” btw, so please click through and decide for yourself whether you think OP’s description of what is going on in them is deliberately misleading or not. …In fact, I will reinclude them here bc they are such nonissues. You will find (in the same order as seen in elegantkittyballoon’s callout post, unless they edit it) posts where dreamerdrop has done such irredeemable (<-sarcasm) things as: dared to include Sisko in the ds9 polycule; listened considerately and openly to someone pointing out blindspots she might have about the Tom Paris/B’Elanna Torres dynamic; was a horror/whump fan who enjoyed a blorbo’s makeup; wrote dubcon Garashir (well-tagged, so you don’t have to read it if you’re not interested in that); and wrote fic about Julian Bashir being a CSA survivor (also well-tagged, so again, no one is being forced to read it, and the CSA is def portrayed as a bad and traumatic thing in the fic).
So. Let’s review. dreamerdrop writes fiction about dark topics (though in a much more thoughtful way than the callout post claims, but that’s beside the point tbh). She also likes the magical girl genre of anime (this squicks out OP). She ships some Star Trek ships (still really unbelievably funny to me that OP picked canon ships to call her out about specifically. OP, I hope you aren't reading this, but if you are, then please consider why you aren't trying to cancel the star trek creators over their ships that they actually wrote, instead of one random person who hasn't even written any Garak/Ziyal or Paris/Torres fics lol, and also genuinely I think you should go join a fandom where you will be having fun, instead of being so distressed by the source material that you lash out at someone for even acknowledging it/engaging with it). That’s it. She is not a predator or dangerous or racist, she is in fact very kind and very open to examining her own biases. This stalkerish account is making shit up to hurt her and isolate her from the fandom community. She doesn’t deserve any of this, and it makes me so sad and angry that she’s being harassed like this.
Anyway, please continue to use your critical thinking skills, let your friends know the context if you see people accidentally repeating these damaging accusations, and maybe keep an eye on your new followers for suspicious behavior, bc this creep says they like to follow all accounts that interact with dreamerdrop’s posts, and they will likely make more throwaways and send more asks spreading damaging rumors and misinformation.
#I’m not gonna put this in ALL the tags that they did#I think I’ll just stick to my corner of the fandom#okay I untagged this from the fandom tags bc OP deleted#but I’m leaving it up for posterity
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I know this is a horror blog but I just had to talk about this because I love The Incredibles but…
I know Headcanons are a thing but people on TikTok genuinely think Syndrome instantly started killing the Supers? Like… instantly? At the ripe age of 12-14? The very next day even? Like… Dude…
There is no way in hell he became a billionaire overnight, bought an island, built the first version of the Omnidroid, hired Mirage and started luring Supers to that island even within the first year or so. I know he was salty af but not to that extent.
And people who are saying stuff like “Oh, Gazerbeam didn’t answer the phone in Incredibles 2 because he was already dead on that island” NO! They say in the movie that he didn’t pick up the phone, nor did Fironic, because Supers had JUST been made illegal. Supers were made illegal probably a few months after the Mr Incredible incidents and again, there is no way Syndrome had already started his evil plan. Maybe he’d started planning it already but he could not have already had the island and the tech and the Omnidroid.
And we don’t know exactly how long it took for Syndrome to go through all the Supers before Bob. Gazerbeam wasn’t the last Super he killed before contacting Bob, there was about 4 more afterwards, and Gazerbeam is only shown to be missing a few months before the movie, which probably means Syndrome was actually going through the Supers way quicker than it might seem. Like he probably contacted one at least once a month, so his murders probably only started a year or two before the main events of the film.
Which makes sense to me, because again, that island, all those workers and his enormous wealth would’ve taken years to build even if he was incredibly gifted, and a few of those years would’ve gone to planning and THEN he would’ve started contacting the Supers to start killing them for his Omnidroid.
Also even if Syndrome did start killing Supers instantly (which there is no way he did) then for that theory that Gazerbeam didn’t answer the phone in Incredibles 2 to make sense, it would mean Syndrome went through like ten Supers in one night, because again, Gazerbeam was one of the last Supers killed. This dude was NOT contacting ten Supers and killing them all in one night.
#the incredibles#Gazerbeam#syndrome#buddy pine#mr incredible#gamma Jack#the Incredibles 2#simon j paladino#nsa files#the nsa files
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*clasps your shoulders gently and looks you straight in the eye*
Keferon. Please read Ninth by Kyn on AO3. I think you would love it very much. It has a large chapter count, but don't be intimidated, it's very easy to get into. It is currently unfinished, but is being updated regularly.
You are the seventh person that recommended this fic to me so ahahahaha yeah
I’m doing great Help I hate some parts of it but I love the other parts I’m spinning in the blender
…..I made the moodboard….
#chapter 37#of 120 or something#I must be like 90k words in haha#large word count is not an intimidation. It’s an invitation haha#I love the fics that I can’t read in just one hour:)#I gotta say I don’t enjoy the concept of making robots into organic life#it’s just my preference#seeing them as humans or animals or whatever feels so fucking wrong#the concept itself drives me off#like. Strongly#But at the same time. This fic isn’t about them being ‘haha cute organics’#it’s ‘oh god. I was turned into something I’m not’#instead of teeheee they’re fluffy#it’s please free me from this fucking nightmare. please let me be myself again.#idk how to explain. I resonate I guess#it often feels very disturbing but the characters are also disturbed#So now I’m kind of stuck reading this fic because I just can’t stop lol#just politely skipping the parts that make me too uncomfortable#also#the body horror is….damn. Impressive. I didn’t expect to read about grotesque fleshy creature turning itself inside out#it’s not even aesthetic or symbolic#it literally looks like a fucking nightmare. Which is impressive also.#the flesh is g r o s s#the beginning got me struggling and skipping#but the intermission is currently ruining my sleep schedule#oh fuck….I usually send my posts to the authors of the fics I read…..but I feel like I might offend the author of Ninth if do this……..#there’s a tiny chance they’re following me….if it’s true then I wanna tell I’m sorry pls don’t take this seriously#your fic got me waay out of my comfort zone#huge points for writing Ratchet. Drift in this fic is…the grossest fucking thing I could probably imagine but Ratchet doesn’t even hesitate#he helps him and he cares for him. Which is…..imma be real my first instinct would be to set Drift on fire to end his misery
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hi! bit new here so sorry if it's been answered, but did you happen to read DC's knight terrors: robin? if so i'd love to hear your thoughts on jason and tim in that comic!
hi! i don't think i've talked in depth about my opinions on KT: Robin, no! i've definitely mentioned it in passing, bc my opinions on it overall are that it's very... lackluster, to be nice. i read the entire Knight Terrors event when it came out so i view it both as a weak entry on Jason and Tim's character, and a weak entry of the overall event. it's nowhere near the worst, i rated it a 5/10 when i read it, but it pales compared to -in my opinion- the writing in the better stories like KT: Detective Comics or KT: Poison Ivy.
i'm largely underwhelmed by Jason and Tim's relationship in the Rebirth era in general. it didn't hold onto the closeness the New-52 gave them, which is a valid choice when re-canonizing Post-Crisis, but it also doesn't have them as antagonistic as they are Post-Crisis. it's this strange, waffling middle ground where they can't seem to decide if they like or dislike each other. they snark at each other, but then are the best of brothers by the end of it. and Knight Terrors really highlights on this. Jason and Tim are snarky- particularly Jason, who rlly seems to dislike Tim. Jason has some interesting lines at the beginning, i think my favorite part of the comic is when Jason says Tim is too far up Batman's ass. they're just very... tropeified? Tim is the smart one who immediately figures out what's going on, which is a critique i have of Knight Terrors overall. i felt like in too many of the stories, the characters immediately knew they were dreaming and thus didn't take their fears as seriously. when the whole point of this event was the horror of it, seeing everyone react to their deepest fears. i had the most fun with the stories where the character truly thought it was real and they were truly petrified. and KT:R didn't play into that, bc it wanted you to see Tim as uber smart.
i'm not entirely against the "worst fears" given to both Tim and Jason. while i will vehemently die on the hill that Tim's worst fear is becoming Batman and what being Batman would do to him (esp post-A Lonely Place of Living) i do like the idea of his worst fear being not being fast enough to save his father. and Jason's worst fear being his own death and not saving his mother is fine. it's the easy choice, but it isn't a terrible one. i'm rather annoyed by how the comic goes overboard with the villain monologuing. i suppose it makes it more dramatic, but i think it makes for poor writing if you need the villain to slam the reader of the head with a monologue rather than assume they'll just get it. i don't need to be told the fear Tim is facing by the Evil Robin, the same goes for Jason. the fears speak for themselves, and i think the horror element would've come across stronger if we were just allowed to watch the nightmares play out and see Jason/Tim react to them rather than be quite obviously told why this is so horrifying for them.
the second issue is where all my issues really lie, though. issue one is... fine, it's just not particularly strong. but at least Jason and Tim feel vaguely like the characters they're supposed to be. Jason's snarky and violent and whatever, Tim's trying to logic his way out. it's very Rebirth-y, but the point gets across. and then the second issue dives into them trying to comfort each other and it just... falls apart.
not only do i haaate the thought of Jason and Tim comforting each other through their nightmares -or at least, managing to do it well- i think so many things both of them say are outright wrong. this comic sort of perpetuates the idea Jason is pushing people away, which... historically, he's really *not*. especially not the Batfamily. i don't think him hanging up on Oracle so he can do a mission alone counts as pushing people away. and as nice a line as "Batman failed you [Jason]" is, i don't see it coming from Tim Drake, of all people. who -as this comic even acknowledges- can be a Batman apologist. (they're both massive Batman apologists in Rebirth but that's neither here nor there) i think having Jason get very "woe is me" blaming himself for his death is flattening to his feelings on his death. it makes sense for Tim to blame himself for his father's death, but there's still that over-the-top "woe is me" factor. and i just hate it's repeated narrative that Tim "demanded" to be Robin (literally not what happened in ALPOD i feel like this fandom gaslights me sometimes) and this has him convinced that he's somehow unwanted. and again, having Jason be the one to soothe Tim and insist he's cool and badass for choosing this is such a slap in the face to Jason's issues with Robin, and how Jason has historically felt about teenage sidekicks. it's a cliche sort of scene, and it *really* doesn't work for Jason and Tim, bc we haven't earned this relationship we're being shown, where i can believe either of these characters like each other enough to be soothed by the other. it's lazy writing, and just... doesn't work for these two. i always felt it was such an odd choice to pair Jason and Tim together, even just ignoring how underexplained the mechanics are of them sharing a nightmare. other characters who share nightmares tended to do so with people they had deep connection with (the Shazamily, for example) but these two don't fit together and it just feels rather stilted.
the final narrative of Jason not being alone and Tim being stronger than he thinks is why i think the fears fall apart when dissected. i don't think Jason fears being alone, and i don't think Tim fears not being strong enough. it's a challenge of writing an event like this, giving a character a "worst" fear that feels thematically satisfactory (bc obviously it's pretty boring if Batman's worst fear is just a stereotypical phobia like. escalators. or bees. most phobias irl are phobias bc they're illogical and humans don't need justification for fear but. that makes for a far less interesting story, so.) but even then, i don't think the challenge was tackled *well*. it's cliche and doesn't dig into either of these characters. this comic takes the easiest way out with both Jason and Tim. it takes the easy plot, with the easy tropes, and has an easy ending. it also just logically caves in on itself. if we establish this nightmare realm doesn't follow physics or logic, then why did both Tim and Jason's nightmares just sit and not bother them while they had their deep conversayiong hyping each other up? that felt rather silly i won't lie. the final hurrah fight scene is just. tiring. like i said, it's all cliches and says nothing about either character. if anything, it just serves to further flatten them and mischaracterize them.
i like the art well enough, but it does sort of feel like the story was shaped around the cool designs for Nightmare Red Hood and Nightmare Robin, and it's being carried by how cool they look rather than just telling an authentic story about their fears.
and as a dirty JayTim shipper, personally i feel like this does nothing for me. it doesn't tap into what i find intriguing about their dynamic. even the New-52 felt more interesting in the JayTim dynamic it built- this is just a pale copy of it. if you're going to reheat the N52's nachos and make them comfort each other, you gotta at least keep the smooth dynamic they have where they click together and know each other better than anyone. but this isn't using that framework, so it wants you to believe they're less amicable, while also having them get along far too easily, and be far too cheerful. in a way it almost feels like they don't actually *know* each other at all, and are just speaking to each other's legacies more than their personhood. maybe everything Jason and Tim say about each other is true in the comic, but it's a surface-level read. there's no bite to it, and whenever i'm analyizing Jason and Tim's Rebirth relationship, i regularly forget this comic even *exists*. like most big DC events, it has the pitfalls of lacking emotional follow-through once the event finished so we can make room for The Next Big Thing, which means the "lessons" this comic is trying to teach Tim and Jason feel immediately forgotten. maybe this comic could be more interesting if Jason and Tim really did work together more afterward, and Jason reached out to Tim for help more. in that aspect, i'm almost inspired by it for fan-content, but i'm so frustrated by all the little details being off that i don't ever engage with it. which is sad, bc the pitched idea of "Jason and Tim are trapped in a nightmare realm together" sounds SO up my alley. i even saved this comic for last when i read all of Knight Terrors bc i had the highest hopes.
it's strange bc the writer seems newer to DC, and i actually loved the one other thing i read by him, Superboy: Man of Tomorrow. i just don't think his strengths lie in either of these characters, or the horror genre. that said, i have JayTim shipper friends who loved this comic and it deepened their love for JayTim, and they quite enjoyed reading the comic with shipper googles on. so mileage certainly varies, and i am just hypercritical of most Rebirth era comics. to the point i almost think i'm meaner to Rebirth than i am N52... Rebirth is utterly directionless. and even if the direction was usually Bad, the N52 actually had a direction most of the time. it was shockingly consistent with Jason and Tim. but Rebirth lacks that consistency and doesn't seem to know what to do with JayTim. i'll always vastly, vastly prefer Post-Crisis JayTim. my heart goes out to the weird little dynamic they had there. and this comic just. doesn't rlly add up to either era. i think my rating now would probably drop to more of a 3/10 or 4/10 upon rereading it to answer this, but i might just be jaded, lol. ty for the ask, though! i love yapping about them and this was a great excuse to collect all my thoughts on this comic bc boy, i clearly had a lot kjhgjhkj
#necrotic answerings#necrotic festerings#knight terrors: robin#jaytim#I had a lot to say and I think this was a ramble. it might be incoherent sorry anon </3#yk as I was rereading the comic to give you a proper review of it#I thought 'actually this isn't *that* bad why did I rate it so low'#then I got to issue two and I was like nevermind!!! I remember why now.#the climax truly had me staring speechless at my screen#and I REALLY do believe that this comic cared only about the cool designs of the nightmares#and the actual storyline? an utter afterthought.#I could go on and on nitpicking every line of dialogue but that felt mean#also it was odd to me that Babs was on comms with Tim like 'you're overworking yourself :('#(which first of all why is she motherhenning grown adults it makes it feel so fanon-y but I digress)#and then on comms with Jason she's like 'i can send Tim to help' which seems. to undermine what she said to Tim lmao#wild comic.#i'm too enemies to lovers pilled to like when characters tell each other how cool they are to help each others fears#it's so boring to me. very YA-ish.#and for what was supposed to be this big horror event? boooooo. tomato tomato.#let me believe these characters are strong enough to get through their fears on their own if you're gonna make them aware it's a nightmare.#but that's less heartwarming. I guess.#seriously WHY was it even trying to BE heartwarming. again horror event.#should've made them fight and be pitted against each other by the nightmares if you ask me. but nooooo. that goes against the happy batfam.#also the blurb for this comic calls them bat-brothers. I gagged over it.#begone forced nuclear family. begone I say#god this is so long i'm so sorry.
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this nemesis ambition started out a little slow but I am getting closer to finding that bastard who killed my wife, and I’ll not rest a minute now that im far closer to on his trail
sorry got in character for a second
Anyways fun ambition so far very fucked up though
congratulations on joining the murder club anon!!!! depending on who you ask the name refers to either people who have murdered or people who have witnessed murder. usually both. actually extremely often both. it's a swell time you'll feel right at home (don't mind our collective skyglass knife collection in the back)
#im still not far into nemesis personally but im very much enjoying it#honestly in a weird way it feels like it's moving faster than HD did. which. is funny bc nemesis is like The gated behind item grinds quest#idk. HD was a fun slowburn where we adventured around gathering our rogues gallery before the action kicked in#nemesis on the other hand feels like im picking up halfway through a batman serial#fallen london#ask#it's WAY more fucked up right off the bat than HD was. honestly ive thought abt red honey for ages. that's so fucked up#and we LEAD with that?? Okay#definitely a horrors-filled ambition befitting caeru (the guy who's constantly going through horrors)#it really encourages you to get fucked up and freaky and in ur character's headspace at basically every step along the way#i only have HD to compare it too but HD was like. a lot more interpretative in comparison? at least to me. that's what it felt like#and i adore HD for that dont get me wrong here#HD just also waited until like. halfway through before it asked what the scoundrel actually Wanted out of its heart's desire#nemesis in comparison is right off the bat who died? who are you mourning? anguish. justice. there must be vengeance.#it's a delightfully different vibe!! i like it!!!#oh god sorry anon im doing the classic yin talking way too much in the tags thing again#i havent had much excuse to talk abt nemesis and what i think of it so far and of course its rp effects on caeru#but i do have a handful of thoughts on it#it's good. im liking it so far. it's starting very strong if nothing else. and i have no spoiler knowledge of what happens in the future#beyond the choice between rewards at the very end#and im SO curious how we'll get to that point. what horrors will we adventure through next? off we go to find out!#it's biggest glaring weakness so far is how horrendously grindy it is. and like. ive been warned and done my research ahead of time#im doing it on the same account im seeking. i knew what i was getting into. but also gots damn.#in comparison HD's 5-card lodgings and dreamgate feel like footnotes#anyway while im already way too deep into rambling did you know the honey trip gives you fate?? insane. why does it do that. hilarious even
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bunter sending peter off to the club like a mother dressing her child to go to school in the morning and making sure he's brought his packed lunch and his homework and his extra pair of socks and all his silly detective gear. that's all. it's just very important to me
"You are quite sure this suit is alright, Bunter?" said Lord Peter, anxiously. . . . "I want to look approachable," he went on, "but on no account loud. I can't help wondering whether that stripe of invisible green wouldn't have looked better if it had been a remote purple."
This suggestion seemed to disconcert Bunter. There was a pause while he visualized a remote purple stripe. At length, however, the palpitating balance of his mind seemed to settle definitely down.
"No, my Lord," he said firmly. "I do not think purple would be an improvement. Interesting, yes, but -- if I may so express myself -- decidedly less affable."
"Thank goodness!" said His Lordship. "I'm sure you're right. You always are. And it would have been a bore to get it changed now. You are sure you've removed all the newness, eh? Hate new clothes."
"Positive, my Lord. I assure Your Lordship that the garments have every appearance of being several months old."
. . .
"And where's my lens?"
"Here, my Lord." Bunter produced an innocent-looking monocle, which was, in reality, a powerful magnifier. "And the fingerprint powder is in Your Lordship's right hand coat pocket."
"Thank you, Bunter."
a) the wodehouseian shoutout of it all. what is bunter but jeeves with the machiavellian streak tuned down and no need to create a certain sublimated frisson with his pet little guy over sartorial disagreements b/c it's truly and genuinely not Like That, b) I cannot get over the mental image of bunter sitting around doing the equivalent of cutting off all the labels and fixing up any annoying seams and washing everything to get the new clothes stiffness out (peter's clothes are obviously all tailored so he doesn't have to deal with those pedestrian sensory horrors in the first place but these are the vibes. 'you've removed all the newness?' is soooo. it's all so much. I love them)
#bunter contemplating the purple stripe with gentle horror. sayers wrote that for me#unnatural death is a very interesting book that I did not like very much even though I'm glad I read it#(if I had to describe it I'd probably go 'kept me braced for micro and macroaggressions I wasn't sure hadn't already happened' lol)#and it did have a near-critical shortage of bunter which i think is partly emblematic of why I didn't enjoy it as much#a solid mystery plot and much to think about but it felt like something was missing from how alive peter's home/personal life feels#in the other books. and it made me appreciate all over again just how central bunter is in that.#bellona club off to a promising start so far in that regard let's see where we're headed!#emotional security is stored in the mervyn bunter#lord peter wimsey#mervyn bunter#(I actually have some deeper thoughts about why unnatural death is such a disconcerting/uncomfortable read#in ways both arguably fruitful to consider and inarguably problematic -- both aspects interesting to contemplate#on an intellectual level! a rich text etc. even though it didn't appeal to me emotionally as much#and for me personally it also boils down to '...where's bunter. I miss bunter. I wonder what bunter is up to')#though we DO get the incredibly hilarious image of bunter in the backseat while parker and wimsey bicker and threaten each other with murde#to be a fly on that particular car interior window fhdasskj. peter effortlessly and probably correctly assuming bunter#would help him bury a body no questions asked#he gets so little *interiority* in that one tho he's just. there sometimes. which I think is also true of the murderer in that case#and that's a really interesting thing to contemplate because it really puts into perspective how well and skillfully sayers does that#in other places. what does it mean when someone falls outside of that whether deliberately or by writerly oversight/unexamined bias#many thoughts head full
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i would love to know the name of the mediocre horror movie so that i too may have thoughts
Unfortunately for all of us, it was Abigail (2024). There's something about a horror movie that's mostly blood and screaming...but with a tantalizing mention of a complex, cracked-mirror world slightly offscreen. It drives me nutty.
#not even going to put this in my movie tag or horror tag. it doesn't deserve it.#I mean it was a perfectly competent horror movie! I have no objections.#but you expect me to care even a little about the people suffering and dying onscreen#when you mention that [redacted redacted redacted]???#you expect me to watch that final girl limp away and think ''ah yes. what a satisfying conclusion.''#and not ''WELL WHAT HAPPENED NEXT''#''I KNOW IT DOESN'T END THERE''#very disappointed in myself. but also a little pleased. I really did think this part of me was gone.#nice to have it slink back again#even if it still has terrible taste.#(edited to add - it looks like this movie shares some dna with ready or not which makes sense; that movie did the same thing)
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You’re gonna die if you keep that up (Patreon)
#Doodles#SCII#Damned#ZEX#Kayako#And Teisel's there technically#*Die again - he's sticking with his track record lol at least he's consistent#Ghost/Curse GF arc!! I enjoy seeing ZEX happy but I am Concerned for him lol#ZEX be attracted to something/one that won't brutally murder him challenge - difficulty impossible#His affection for the grotesque and monstrous - I mean while it's admirable he does regularly put himself in dangerous situations!#Runs solely on the Suspension Bridge Effect lol - attraction and fear so conflated in his mind <3#I keep thinking of his human instincts as specifically Max's instincts since it's his body - Max's self-preservation and fear and hunger#Which ZEX dutifully ignores lol Max's body tells him to bolt and privately replies like ''Yes yes in a moment'' haha#His fascination wins out! To his own detriment haha#Although I say all that as though I don't relate in my own way - I have maybe just a few too many notes relating to ZEX lol#It's always been hard for me to get into horror in the way it's intended to spook and scare because I tend to get sad :')#So many monsters and ghosts and creatures are victims of circumstance! Like Kayako! As she is here she's not even malicious just dangerous#I've never seen the Grudge so it's only speculation but it seems very sad that she was tethered as a Curse rather than a malignant spirit#Like a battery moreso than an individual - what a terrible after-existence! It makes me sad to consider!#ZEX reaching out to her in his own way is very sweet <3 He's so biased towards his darlings hehe#In a way being human does suit him - we'll packbond with anything that Might have even the slightest inclination to not maim us lol#And the way he personifies her! (VUXonifies her?) Reading intention or emotion into her actions with no proof and no understanding!#The way he ''tries to read her face'' as if he hasn't been struggling with that this entire time - with other humans who can tell him so ♪#His pride is so delicious <3 He is so easily blinded to his own shortcomings in the face of pleasure and the potential for connection!#It's no wonder DAX worries about him so much hehe ♥#It also always makes me so happy to have something fit together so perfectly like those last two hehe <3#That vine didn't exist when this happened! But there it is!! I love newer memes on older media hehehe ♪♫
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Yknow with how many posts you make about characters named Chris, I feel like you should get into Resident Evil for like a week just to add another to the roster
it's so funny that you say this actually cuz i did have a mini resident evil phase for a while! i say mini though cuz it wasn't really a full, all-encompassing hyperfixation where it consumed my soul lol, but i did really enjoy markiplier's re7+8 and re2 remake playthroughs and i latched onto them for a bit. ^^ i was more into the mithan/ethan winters of it all than the more classic resident evil characters admittedly but i have been interested in going back and playing some of the older games at some point! or at least watching someone else play them, lmao. i'm not really a survival horror guy when it comes to actually playing games, but maybe if easy mode is kind enough on a novice like me it could be fun to actually pick up a controller for once glksadjfkl ^^;
#i'm sure they're on pc right. at the very least piratable on pc?#idk i'll have to look into it lol#but yeah my mini resident evil phase holds a special place in my heart because it helped me transition out of my tma hyperfixation :')#which as i've complained about too much on here i know lmao but god that fandom was so bad for me so i was so relieved to have a lifeboat#in the form of campy fun survival horror game and pathetic but determined mold dad <3#admittedly chris redfield didn't get on my radar very much so i don't know if he's really *my* type of character#my uh. undefinable 'know it when i see it' marshy vibes type of character lmao#but i also didn't really get into his character very much because i didn't really get into the games that he has more of a role in lol#so who's to say!#even if he doesn't become a Fave fave i do know a bit about the protective big brother vibes with claire from the re2 remake#and that always gets me in some capacity even if it doesn't always a blorbo make#but yeah resident evil. man. thank you for reminding me i've been distracted by other things i forgot i wanted to get back to that gklsdjfk#i make no promises about it happening any time soon but i am thinking about it again. 👀#marshy gets asks#fukindork
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big question of the day is which wip to work on to avoid the new ideas sneaking up on me
#because that is NOT HAPPENING#as much as i want to i REALLY need to stop starting new things#my poor shelved wips. you were so loved. until i got bored and forgot and likely won't pick you up again </3#today's choices i'm debating are the gunhan i've mostly been working on or the horror one#OR picking up the one i can't post on here. which i'm kinda leaning towards#very funny it's another jungji. why do they keep getting the Terrible ones#i mean it's actually rewritten from a minwon i started as retaliation but that joke is dead (i hope)#it is quite angsty for me too. debating if it's too similar to rotten apples but eh find something you're good at i guess#even if i probably shouldn't be good at writing it. oh well#but it's also like. do i want to get something actually finished relatively soon. because that would be the gunhan#guess i could post that for gunil's birthday. we'll see#why do i do this to myself#writer problems#chewy ramblings
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having an issue where the more i discover games/books/movies that completely nail what i like, the pickier i become with stuff that doesn't reach those heights. starting to feel like i have to dig extremely deep to find the "good stuff" and my tolerance for things i find "meh" is practically nonexistent :(
(mostly with books actually. movies i've always been picky about so nothing's changed there, and video games keep hitting home runs for me.)
#mind you my preference is gothic/lovecraftian horror and it's not like there's a LACK of those books out there#but aughh... my standards are too high#i tried reading What Moves the Dead by T Kingfisher bc it gets tons of praise online and i had to DNF it like 1/3 of the way through#god it was awful... quirky millenial ass writing. YA ass dialogue#interrupting the narrative to do worldbuilding for your fictional european nation and fictional language???????#also weird amounts of bitching about the american character??#which normally idc about (i don't like my country either </3) but you're adapting a classic american author's work so it just felt weird#like i'll just go reread the original Fall of the House of Usher thanks#ANYWAY point being internet book recs are suspicious to me. some of you have very bad taste#thank you horrorlit subreddit for showing me The Fisherman by John Langan tho that was a winner <333#i know i sound pretentious. i don't like it either. but idk if i'm even able to force myself to lower my standards again lol
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So I finished mazinkaiser awhile ago after months of procrastination on it and for one reason or another I’m not gonna give my solid thoughts on it but there is one specific thing I wanna point out, not as a critique but more so a confusion. That being: I find it weird how Mazinkaiser isn’t the turning point for Mazinger where they finally go “hey the robot is sentient” because it’s not yet near the end literally EVERYONE talks to Venus A as if shes actually a person:




I’m not saying this as a criticism for the reason of my already biased to vaguely sentient robots-because as much as I prefer this angle with mecha, I understand not every and all mecha can approach this because sometimes the robot is JUST a narrative tool and not a character, which is fine-however I’m confused with Mazinger of all things didn’t take this approach when there’s already so much emphasis on Mazinger being tied to gods. I mean, apart from the fact the robots are based off Greek Mythology and there is a constant message of “will it become God or Devil” which feels like it warrants this enough, it would start to make sense if the robot grew sentient because Mazinkaiser is treated as the ULTIMATE Mazinger. (And where have we heard a case where the “ultimate” form of a robot starts to be the one that displays more self awareness *cough* GETTAH🗿)
Especially also within this ova- it seems to do stuff on its own accord to PROTECT Koji, like going on auto pilot as he’s knocked out and somehow keeping him safe from being burned alive in magma, but I cannot tell if this IS a indicator Mazinkaiser is actually sentient or if it’s just all auto pilot. Oh and it’s a more minor thing but also just- the human poses Kaiser and Venus take during the beach episode… I cannot tell if that’s something they wanted or if their pilots just posed them comfortably because lines seem to blur with the robots just being treated as the extensive of the pilots. (Venus is literally based off of Sayakas appearance after all)
It’s just weird Nagai never went this route and just stuck to metaphorical stuff, when it feels like SOMETHING he would do given the nature of his stories and yet the only fully sentient Mazinger media I know is Zero. Of course I still have such a limited window on Mazinger so if this is me actually being wrong please feel free to correct me, but I still will never not find it weird Mazinkaiser lacks this aspect asides from maybe vague allusions to it that may or may not be implying it. Maybe if I ever rewatch it or find more Mazinkaiser content specifically I’ll be able to piece things together a bit more.
#meg text#mazinkaiser#mecha rambles#also before any asks I have also seen SKL and let me tell ya despite how off the rails it already is it makes Kaiser even WEIRDER#SKL!Kaiser is like- supposed to metaphorically be fucking satan and your telling me that robot ISN’T sentient?#the manga straight up implies it drives its pilots INSANE which just proves Kaido and Magami are that off their rockers to handle it#oh and just the fact Kaiser pops out the ground for them whenever… that’s either a very specific auto pilot or its sentient#granted the fact I know mazinkaiser originated from SRW from it being “born from getter rays” does not make my ordeal any less conflicting#obviously they retcon that out but like-#your gonna have a mazinger be born from a getter- SHIN GETTER no less and NOT be sentient?#and again I’m not even mad it’s not the getter approach bc not all mecha’s need to become cosmic horrors (even if it be sexy ngl I mean)#but it’s weird go fucking nagai never once considered in his crazy ass mecha already to make his robot LITERALLY sentient#and there being consequences for that on top of all the dangers Koji has to face being in this damn robot#again maybe I’m just a idiot and some of this is true bc I’m not the most knowledgeable on mazinger aside from the basics and it’s impact#but sure as hell never seen anyone mention this and I doubt it’s just a factor of “it’s niche” when it’s fucking mazinger
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Me right now: "The Smitten is just like me for real."
Like???? I hope not??????
#lile god i hope he isn't??? i hope I'm not like that???#...ok i do be like that to a degree i can't lie#like haha i understand your intense need to die a great death for someone you love and your preoccupation with the chase but not the result#and your immense disregard for yourself as a person which leads you to or perhaps is the consequence of transforming into a tool#a role and an object but it's never enough is it and you'll never be enough will you? and the clock on the wall it keeps on ticking#and you repeat 'this is how it's supposed to be'. and if you look inside yourself you will see that there is no yourself to look in.#if you look inside yourself you will find a shadow in the body of someone else#like ah boy just like me you subscribe to the Folk story but there is no curtain to roll when the dragon is slain#you get the girl and what then? if you don't die then what then? maybe if you destroy yourself enough you will achieve something#maybe if you tear your chest open the curtains will fall. otherwise the only thing left is 'what am i supposed to do?'#the one thing that I pray we don't have in common is his tendency to make caricatures of people in his head#like uuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhh i hope i don't do that.#which reminds me kinda funny how people were giving him way more slack when just Dam//sel existed. like i disliked him more back then#because The Da//msel is VISCERALLY horrifying to me. cannot stress how physically nauseous the chapter makes me#which might sound ironic considering I'm the biggest pioneer of 'boooo if anyone ever gets to know the real me I'm packing my bags#and leaving. nobody is allowed to interpret me the correct way. if you know me you don't. i hope you misunderstand every word i say.'#but i see a very thick line between not understanding me and between making up an idealised smooth harmless caricature of me#that you attempt to shove me into. like. the song The Projectionist by Aurelio Voltaire is what I'm referring to#and that's horrifying to me. like ah no not again please. a few times in my life was enough.#I'd say that simply 'not understanding' is Spec//tre and TPA//TD. And those routes are depressing#but not horrifying. they're like 'haha oh god that's me. don't mind my tears.' but Dam//sel is like...genuine horror. to me.#and HA//E actually made my opinion of Smi//tten better because like no no I get him. I also get H//AE Prin//cess. like haha that's me. ow.#Like haha girl the way you are incapable of saying the words 'i want' and cannot bear to say what you feel or think because you aren't#supposed to; it isn't what you should do; you should cave in and make others happy; don't you WANT to make others happy and who#gave you the right to even want something anyway; well it reminds me of the mirror in my house
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i try to avoid my acc being Just vntposting . in this world. but man is it going
#vwoop.noises#rest of tags is a lil heavy one#I am just so like. baseline unhappy with my life#and i can't be distracted all the time because like A) I have to be a person and B) World Cannot Revolve Around Me#and even a bit of those distractions have been Also caked in misery bc i am. difficult#so like what even is the point#And then. school .#did not go to my exams. my parents are mad and sayign i can't take a semester off because this was my write off and its like. NO. NOT REALL#they do not care how much of a mental breakdown i have visibly because they do not believe anything I have Not had any sort of rest .#and also like. they have their own problems. but one of these problems is telling me i wouldn't Really act like this#bc. and i really do like. wish that ppl would get help but we've tried but. over the last couple years my mom has believed that things#have been replaced / altered. and constantly brings up like. Oh yr dad NEVER ate pizza before :/ / you would've never said that / etc#Which like. it's such a genuine mental health thing like I deeply fully understand but I've been the only one taking it on and I am like.#21yo and very useless. And Also She's Mean 2 Me Now. I don't know what to do /shrug#And that's my storey . Kind of why it's been a constant stream of negativity we are doing :heart: Bad#like a year and a half ago: haha it's okay i'll just lock in next semester#the horrors: Hello. You are never doing an assignment again#sorry for the lore drop . thx if youve read this far idc if not. it's nice to get off my chest for real.#i gotta. make something soon idk#i can pretend that it will fix me :D#i am doing okay for the record uhhh we persist or whatever. if u are concerned of my absence my other blogs r in my pinned :]#I am still chronically online believe this. this is just my original posts blog. n mncrft sometimes still#after typing this out i left it on my puter to go search for food#and i had a huge rant sesh with my brother and this did kinda fix me ngl . Still posting tho.
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Why am I so both of them (Patreon)
Upon first watch, I immediately started by relating to Angel, in no small part because of their intro
Doodle on yellow sheet from 2019 came to mind, as well as bunnies being a motif, angels generally, being a fan of wearing stripes of course, hoodies - all on an ADHD enby artist whose favourite colour is bluple lol, no wonder I love them!
I also relate to Lee tho! Wait that sounds bad lol - more specifically in the dark clothes, body type, being a gifted kid, taking some things very seriously - even jokes by accident; so many of his little details, I kept being like “Oh, me” about. They’re both so well-written ♥ The realism evoked, their easy back and forths - the writing is very strong in my opinion :D
#My art#Man it's so fun to do pixel stuff with vectors huah#I considered going with any of my blue hoodies - I have several after all!#But where would Lee's fashion come in then?#I think what's especially funny is that the stripes are still a more recent addition to my wardrobe#I fully did the all-black-wardrobe from juniour high onward#Just like Lee....#Those yellowpage doodles were concept art to a comic about gender too...Huh#/And/ about being protected.....including from family.............. Hm :T#Stop being me please it's freaking me out /pos#Sign of a good realistic horror - hey wait stop that's too real haha#The realism can be very upsetting weh :'0 But again that just means it's well-made!#Honestly their chat in the car was something I related to so much - which was doubly interesting to me since they differ so strongly!#Angel says they don't relate at all and yet I'm over here like ''Oh yeah you've just described me'' to Lee's story#And then they share their side and I'm like ''No yeah that's also me....'' lol#There's a few little diametrically opposed moments like that which stand out to me in fact ♪#Like Lee's explanation of a water system through the brain - it didn't occur to me until after I'd shared that scene with the Reds#One sided with Angel and the other with Lee! (I sided with Angel as well for the record lol) But the fact that it's written Just So#That no matter which side you end up on the writing accounts for it just by how it is - not even an option to pick a choice to make just!#Just how it is..... Just how it's written...... Ah... Awesome....#It's really something :D Something to study something to admire ♪#It makes me a stronger reader!!!!!!! I love being a stronger reader it means I can return to the things I already love and love them more#I feel more prepared having experienced these two's journey to return to others I've enjoyed - I feel more ready to appreciate them :)#I love that kind of feeling <3 I love being challenged by a work and coming out the other side more myself hehe#And apparently more them as well lol - recognition of self in the other /slight concern /deep respect#Clinical Trial
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