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conceptuma · 11 days ago

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I think what people who criticize diets don't get is that the "my skin is so clear I feel so good eating (seemingly depressing diet)!" isn't just performative. most of the time it's real, I think? I'm just speaking from my own experience. and there has to be a distinction between dieting for aesthetics and dieting for actual health reasons (and you can also do both ofc)

I think people project their own fear of a depressing dietary restriction onto people who it actually works for... they genuinely believe deep down, even if only subconsciously, that people who are enthusiastic about their diet are secretly suffering.

this actually applies to sexual abstinence too hahah. any kind of abstinence. everyone is different and maybe people do it out of guilt, or aren't quite comfortable with it yet and are still aspiring to get there, but I'm pretty sure someone does something because they actually want to, or they sincerely believe that they will learn and gain something from it. I do think the narrative of breaking guilty abstinence is cool because it's sex positive but I also think abstinence, when done right, is underrated.

anyway thats a tangent which doesnt really apply to me but

dietary speaking. yeah its the other way around. NOT dieting is the hellish world actually. finding a diet that works for you feels like salvation from that hell. this i can speak from experience

edit for clarification: im not yapping about EDs btw thats a serious societal and mental issue. i dont know much about it so im not talking about it. this is more like a thought about when northernlion lightheartedly criticizes average diet fans

#yapping #my dad got prescribed keto diet and he has very similar symptoms to me and to my surprise the keto diet is the only thing that doesnt make #me overstimulated and in pain and uncomfortable and tired and sick 24/7 #the main issue i have rn is just not having enough money to afford the right foods all the time. i often have to borrow or share other food #that arent befitting to my own diet :( which causes problems obviously. sigh #anyway i thought of making this post bc i started to crave buttered bread but i dont do well w whitebread which is what my fam got #and then that reminded me of when i heard abt a relative who went keto and ate WHOLE STICKS OF BUTTER #and i was like hmmmm... and then i ate 1/4 a stick of butter...#which should make me nauseous sure i did put it with a little bit of bread just incase it did #but it actually felt good to eat a lot of butter. like i really needwd that #i think it relates to fat and not having enough fats when ur on keto? i get nauseous from fatty meats unfortunayely so #idk im still figuring this stuff out #like recently i found toppoki rice doesnt give me issues that most rice does... i need to learn more about grains

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anon-apple · 10 months ago

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Hot Soup and Soft Bread 13

Table of Contents and Synopsis <- Chapter 12 Read on WordPress

Chapter 13: Soymilk and Fried Dough I

T/N: New chapter title! One of my favorite breakfast combos~[1]

The next morning, Zhou Cunqu woke up before Zhong Qiuyan. He dug himself out of Qiuyan’s arms and took a deep breath. With one finger, he grazed Qiuyan’s face, then he rubbed his ear, and then he leaned in and planted a kiss on his lips. Qiuyan, still half-asleep, laughed and said: “Some people act like a pervert first thing in the morning.”

Cunqu said: “The alarm’s about to go off.”

Qiuyan opened his eyes, looked at the clock, and sat up. Then he lay back down, drew Cunqu into his arms, and started messily kissing him. The alarm then really went off.

Qiuyan got up once again. He stood amid the piles of books and stretched. Cunqu suddenly stretched out his leg and lightly pressed his foot against his underwear. Qiuyan almost fell on top of the books. Cunqu started chuckling.

Recently, Da Yu did actually go to study hairdressing at a trade school. He spent the money to buy a fake head; he heard that from long hair to short hair you could cut it 300 different times. When he was on break, he went to find Qiuyan at the bus station to get lunch together. Qiuyan sat under the shade of a tree deep in thought. Da Yu hit him and asked: “What are you thinking about?”

Qiuyan bluntly replied, “About things that happen in a bed.” He asked if Da Yu had any experience. The latter rebuked, “How could I have experience on what it’s like between two men.”

Qiuyan grumbled, “I knew I couldn’t depend on you.”

After a bit, Da Yu cleared his throat and asked a bit awkwardly: “How far have you two gotten?”

Qiuyan also cleared his throat. He replied with a red face, “Not telling.”

A couple of days ago, when Qiuyan stayed over, he and Cunqu were kissing against his bed. And he got hard from the kissing. Cunqu laughed as he said, “Really impressive.”

Ever since they started dating, Qiuyan had only gone as far as feeling around underneath Cunqu’s pajamas. That day he pressed Cunqu beneath him, bit the side of his neck, and grinded against him. Cunqu slid his hand under his underwear. Qiuyan immediately stopped moving; he didn’t even dare to breathe. Cunqu stroked him, his head pressed against Qiuyan’s chest. Qiuyan couldn’t last for long. Cunqu pressed his lips against his ear and said: “Little virgin.”

Reminiscing to this point, he suddenly said to Da Yu: “It was oddly exciting.”

Da Yu yelled: “Who asked!”

After meeting up with Zhou Pianyan, Qiuyan asked Cunqu if they wanted to move the time of their walk to earlier and try to go outside when it’s still day. Liu Xiaoying had a calligraphy class at the school for the elderly in the afternoons twice a week. One of those days was coincidentally Qiuyan’s day off from work. They had lunch together. Xiaoying went back to her room for a midday nap and then headed out right after. Qiuyan had recently bought two new outfits for Cunqu that fit better. He hugged Cunqu’s waist and said, “Our family's kid needs to eat more. And be less picky. Or he’ll get beat.”

Cunqu laughed. Nowadays even if he didn’t have an appetite he would force himself to eat something.

Qiuyan tugged Cunqu’s hand and said: “It’s really hot outside in the afternoon. Just listen to those cicadas.” He stuck a small fan in Cunqu’s hand. And so Cunqu held that pink mini fan and walked slowly downstairs with Qiuyan. The new resident on the fourth floor was a family of three. The child was a chubby little kid around four or five years old who was attending a kindergarten nearby.

That day, teacher Zhuang’s place on the third floor had its door open. A few people were talking inside. Cunqu was a little nervous. Qiuyan squeezed his hand and said, “Look at me, don’t look over there.”

They walked down to the first floor. Perhaps because it was too hot out, the Go table of the “Double Yolk Egg” grandpas was there, but they were not. Qiuyan and Cunqu sat down at their chairs. They didn’t speak for a while, and instead blankly stared at the garden in front of them. A few dragonflies flew by in the garden. It was an incredibly ordinary scene, but Cunqu suddenly felt like he was in a dream. A dream where he didn't shut himself up for two years. A dream where this was just any other summer day of the 29th year of his life.

Qiuyan spoke up from the side, telling him that the city’s art museum had a large glass lotus pond. These few days were the last days of their flowering season, and a bunch of people were there to take photos. He asked Cunqu if he wanted to take a look.

Cunqu was still watching the dragonfly in front of him. He lightly said, “That was designed by our team.” Qiuyan turned to look at him. He leaned against his chair and said with his head lowered, “It was designed by me…”

Teacher Zhuang passed away. When one did the math, she was even younger than Liu Xiaoying by two years. Xiaoying went to attend her funeral at noon. Cunqu sat at the dining table eating a set meal that Qiuyan had ordered for him. When Qiuyan called him, a lot of noise and bustle came from the other end of the call. He asked, “Are you eating?”

Cunqu replied: “I’m eating right now.”

It sounded like Qiuyan ran to somewhere more quiet, and he continued to ask: “Does it suit your taste?”

Cunqu said: “It’s not bad.” He made an effort to finish the majority of his bowl of rice. Right now, he didn’t just want to persist for Xiaoying’s birthday celebration. He also wanted to try his best to become a lover worthy of Zhong Qiuyan.

After Qiuyan heard Cunqu say that, he suddenly flicked Cunqu’s forehead, saying: “‘Obsessive try-hard disorder’, get away from my ge’s body. Ge is already the most perfect person in this world.”

Cunqu held his forehead and laughed.

When Xiaoying returned back home, she was visibly fatigued. She sat down on the couch and massaged her own leg. Qiuyan eagerly ran over and helped her massage her shoulders. Xiaoying rambled on about her and Teacher Zhuang’s revolutionary friendship. The two of them both started off as teachers in a small rural town. Then they were transferred to the city’s First Elementary School. After that, the school was renamed Experimental Elementary School. One became the academic administration director, the other the vice principal, all the way until retirement.

Teacher Zhuang had a loud voice. She was very serious and didn’t date until pretty late. Her husband was the younger cousin of Qi Wenxian, Xiaoying’s husband. The two men passed away one after the other. Teacher Zhuang and Xiaoying had joked that they had “returned to the single life.”

The first year that Cunqu isolated himself, Xiaoying headed over to Teacher Zhuang’s place to cry every time she felt down, then she would return to her place and make food for Cunqu with a smile. When Teacher Zhuang was diagnosed with dementia and was sent to a care facility, Xiaoying stood outside the building and watched her old friend get taken away by the facility’s vehicle. In mental confusion, Teacher Zhuang kept crying. She reached out a hand towards Xiaoying and asked through her tears: “Didn’t mom say it was time for dinner? Where are they taking me? Go tell my mom that I’m being taken away.”

Xiaoying had held her hand with red-rimmed eyes.

Xiaoying came back to her senses after losing herself for a bit in the memories and suddenly said to Qiuyan: “After people get old, they turn into useless baggage.”

Qiuyan said: “Who said that? Liu Xiaoying you are a very useful, very extraordinary lady.”

Xiaoying started laughing and placed her hands on her hips: “Of course.”

She turned her head and saw Cunqu standing at the door watching her. She smiled and said: “Grandma is fine.” She stood up and slowly walked to Cunqu and hugged him, repeating: “Grandma is fine.”

-> Chapter 14

Footnotes

[1] There is no agreed-upon translation for 油条 (Yóutiáo) (wikipedia). I’ve seen “fried dough”, “fried dough stick”, “oil stick,” “fried chinese donut”. Essentially, it’s a large stick of airy dough that’s deep fried. It’s oily, crispy on the outside, chewy on the inside from the gluten. It’s an extremely common and popular breakfast food especially in combination with (and dipped into) soy milk or congee. [2] Qiuyan jokingly referring to Cunqu as the “kid” here. Qiuyan has this habit of tacking on “our family’s” (我们家) when he’s talking about Cunqu. Rather than its literal meaning, it’s an affectionate descriptor which conveys a little bit of possessiveness too. And it’s not odd to address in third-person someone you are directly talking to in Chinese. [3] Cicadas are louder when it’s hotter. Not sure why or if it’s actually scientifically true, just something people including me have observed lol

T/N: Is grandma fine though...is grandma fine?? Reading this, I cried. Translating this, I think I cried again. Editing this, I'm about to cry the third time! Something about the thought that Teacher Zhuang and Xiaoying had been friends ever since they were girls, young women, working together in the same place for decades, marrying men who were cousins, settling down and living just one floor away from each other, being close friends, confidantes, practically sisters...and then Xiaoying having to watch her lose herself to the inevitability of dementia, brought away because she couldn't take care of herself, and then eventually passing away. Like, just, fuck. Maybe that's just something that people get used to at this age, but just as a reader I feel so much pain, but also so much fear, because it's not just that you're losing someone so near and dear to you, you're also seeing a version of how you might end up in a few years, a few months.

#chinese novel #translation #chinese bl #hot soup and soft bread #danmei #chinese webnovel #novel update #yapped in the post again #but anyways #other than all that i really love love love youtiao #maybe I should just write it as “youtiao” rather than trying to translate it??#ok anyways but it's so simple it's literally just an oily dough stick it doesn't even taste like much other than oil #why is it so good #not even about the crisp either because i love soaking it in congee or soymilk #why is soggy oily fried dough so good #also lol QIuyan being a mega virgin randomly asking Da Yu about bed affairs is so on brand for him

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