#findingyourself

[in-tenebris-et-in-solitudine]

I had lost myself trying to please others, but ever since I've started to put me first I've started to be more myself and my inner child is happier.

[caesarandthecity]

The Weight of Growing Up

Is this what growing up feels like? Letting go of the will to live?

I remember being a kid, dreaming of leaving home, of moving to the United States.

I grew up. I made it.

And then what?

What about the dreams I have now? The dreams I had as a child? Do I let them go?

Do I forget that once, I dared to dream big? That I reached for the sky, but couldn’t quite grasp it?

Do I have to kill the child I once was?

Do I have to crush his dreams, throw them away, even though I love reliving them in my mind?

I tried.

But dreams don’t just die.

Not like that.

Not the dreams of little César.

I have to let go of who I was to become who I’m meant to be.

My God… it hurts.

But I have to let go.

Goodbye.

[trendsnova]

When the Job Ends: Discovering the Self Beneath the Title

Who Are You When No One’s Watching?

Imagine walking into a room where no one knows your job title, achievements, or how you make a living. What would you say about yourself? What remains when your professional identity is stripped away?

For many, the answer is deeply uncomfortable. That discomfort points to a hidden truth: we’ve tied our sense of self so tightly to our work that without it, we feel lost. We aren’t just employees — we’ve become our jobs.

Psychologist Carl Jung spoke of “masks” we wear to function in society. One of the most dominant masks today is our career. And when that gets taken off — by choice or by circumstance — we’re left staring into a void. It’s not just unsettling. It’s an identity crisis.

Your Job Isn’t Just Work — It’s a Story You’ve Been Telling

The anxiety people feel after job loss isn’t just about finances or daily structure. It’s about the narrative they’ve lived by. Sociologist Erving Goffman called this “role engulfment” — the idea that one role becomes so central, it overtakes every other part of your identity.

Ask yourself:

How do you introduce yourself at a party?

How often does your productivity determine your self-worth?

When a role becomes your entire story, losing it feels like erasure. But maybe — just maybe — it’s your chance to write a better one.

You’ve Outsourced Your Purpose — Time to Bring It Home

There’s a silent lie most of us buy into: that purpose comes from titles, promotions, or applause. But as Viktor Frankl, Holocaust survivor and psychiatrist, famously said, meaning is something we create, not something assigned by job descriptions.

If your purpose ends with your paycheck, your foundation is fragile. The job was only ever a vehicle for something deeper. And if that vehicle breaks down? You can find another one that maybe takes you further.

No Title. No Problem. Now What’s Left?

This moment — the in-between space after loss and before rebuilding — is powerful. It’s where discomfort lives, and where self-discovery begins.

Instead of rushing to plug the gap with another job, try sitting still. Ask:

What excites me outside of my resume?

What would I pursue if no one were watching?

What values do I live by, even when no one pays me for them?

Clarity doesn’t come from running. It comes from reflection.

Find Your ‘Why’ Again — Without the Company Badge

Simon Sinek, in his influential book Start With Why, reminds us that true fulfillment starts not with what we do, but why we do it. If your job was your outlet for impact, that’s great. But it was never the only one.

Your why hasn’t disappeared — it just needs a new form. Volunteering, mentoring, building something from scratch, creating art, helping others — these are not hobbies. They’re pieces of your deeper purpose, waiting to be reclaimed.

Try. Fail. Repeat. Rediscover.

Philosopher Alain de Botton once said, “A good half of the art of living is resilience.” This is your cue to explore the roads you left unexplored. Not to prove anything, but to reconnect with curiosity.

Try a new craft.

Revisit an old passion.

Learn something that doesn’t come with a certificate.

Don’t wait to become perfect — just begin.

The Four-Phase Path to Rebuilding Identity

This isn’t just emotional work. It’s neurological. Neuroscientist Dr. Dan Siegel’s work on neuroplasticity proves our brains can rewire and reshape who we are, at any age.

Here’s your roadmap:

The Breakdown:

Let yourself feel the grief. Journal. Reflect. Talk. Don’t skip this step.

The Exploration:

Identify what makes you feel alive. Follow it without judgment. Curiosity is your new compass.

The Rebuild:

Turn insights into action. Take up small projects. Volunteer. Learn. Create — not to prove, but to grow.

The Integration:

This is the moment when you realize: you’re not the job you lost. You’re the person you’re becoming — wiser, deeper, and freer.

If You Don’t Reclaim Your Identity, Someone Else Will Define It

The tragedy isn’t losing a job. It’s letting that loss define the rest of your life.

Without inner clarity, you’ll drift from role to role, mistaking titles for meaning and wondering why life still feels hollow.

As Viktor Frankl warned, when we lose meaning, we seek distraction — often in shallow pleasures or chronic busyness.

You deserve more than that.

This Isn’t an Ending — It’s a Rewrite

So ask yourself:

What part of me have I ignored in the name of being “useful”?

What matters to me is that no paycheck ever reflected?

Who am I becoming — not as a worker, but as a human?

Because in the end, your job was never who you were. It was just one sentence in the story.

Now, it’s time to write the rest.

[whispersfromaquietheart]

https://thoughtsbetweenstars.wordpress.com/2025/05/21/torn-between-healing-and-dating-my-struggle-to-stay-single/

[juhnkit]

Chill n'Fill Episode 17

Seek and You Shall Find, Darkness Falls, and Worried Masterpieces   I arrived for my Wednesday shift at Chill n’Fill to find Bob wrestling with our one-eyed polar bear sign again. This time, he was carefully attaching what appeared to be a tiny telescope to the bear’s remaining good eye. The sombrero had been removed… “seasonal branding,” Bob had explained via text… and replaced with what looked…

[timeacoaching]

🌿 Discover Your True Self

🧠 Read the full reflection: 👉 Discover Your True Self

Who are you, beyond the roles you play and the expectations placed on you? This piece explores the journey of self-discovery, letting go of external labels, and embracing the authentic you beneath it all.

[artcarablue]

Precious us. - Chapter 2 : Unexpected plans (on Wattpad) https://www.wattpad.com/1529500823-precious-us-chapter-2-unexpected-plans?utm_source=web&utm_medium=tumblr&utm_content=share_reading&wp_uname=carablue932 And just when I stopped expecting, love came in 5'11" and said, "hi." ~ New chapter dropping every Saturday

[sajiyasagufta]

[in-tenebris-et-in-solitudine]

I’ve been realizing a lot lately.

[allanrufus]

🎵 24/7 Personal Growth Positive Music: The Journey With-In; It's where it Begins (Soul Searching)

This positive soul-searching song, The Journey Within: Embracing Life as an Adventure, is about self-discovery, growth, and the courage to take the first step toward inner transformation. It reminds us that life is not just about reaching a destination but about the lessons, experiences, and emotions we embrace along the way.The Journey Within is an anthem for those seeking purpose, healing, and…

[travelersmile]

When the ego dies, the soul awakens

[aethergem]

Tongue tied?🙊 

Communication is everything, whether it’s in friendships, relationships, or even how you express yourself creatively. Lapis Lazuli is here to help you level up your communication and self-expression. 

Need a little extra clarity to dish out some solid advice?  

Or maybe you're looking to speak from the heart with confidence?  

Lapis supports boosting creativity, tapping into your inner wisdom, and keeping negative vibes at bay. 

🌊 Water signs, this one’s made for you. Wear Lapis to speak your truth, stay confident, and protect your energy from negativity. 

[rizalllmochamad]

Merindukan Kamu yang Jauh di Sana

Malam terasa semakin panjang saat jarak memisahkan kita. Ada rindu yang menggantung di udara, menyelimuti hati setiap kali bayanganmu terlintas. Jarak ini, sejauh apapun, tak mampu menghapus kenangan indah tentang senyummu, tawa yang pernah menghangatkan hari-hariku, dan semua obrolan yang dulu terasa begitu dekat.

Ada banyak hal yang ingin kuceritakan, banyak cerita yang ingin kubagi, namun hanya sunyi yang menemani setiap kali ingin kusampaikan kata "Aku rindu." Rasanya seperti menunggu hujan di tengah gurun, berharap bisa merasakan kehadiranmu meski hanya sekejap.

Terkadang, aku bertanya pada angin, apakah ia bisa menyampaikan rinduku padamu? Atau pada bintang, apakah ia bisa melihatmu di sana dan membisikkan namaku? Karena setiap malam, hanya doa yang bisa kupanjatkan, berharap kamu merasakan hangatnya pelukan ini meski dari kejauhan.

Aku tahu, jarak bukanlah akhir dari cerita kita. Rindu ini, meski menyiksa, adalah bukti bahwa kamu berarti, bahwa setiap detik tanpamu adalah ujian kesabaran. Dan hingga saat kita bertemu lagi, biarkan rindu ini menjadi pengikat hati yang menjaga cinta kita tetap hangat, meski kamu jauh di sana.

[worldwatcher3072]

They're eating our spaghetti!

[in-tenebris-et-in-solitudine]

Make sure you find happiness within yourself so you don’t have to depend on anyone to give you it. Cause people come and go.

[travelersmile]

What we achieve inwardly will change outer reality.