#foundation deviation
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I do love Ethan's smug "Mr. Lane, meet the IMF" at the end of Rogue Nation. Lane is alone when he traps Ethan at the start, but in springing a mirror of that trap Ethan doesn't wish he'd caught Lane on his own to prove himself equal. Quite the opposite—he's going "suck it Lane, I won because my friends are cool as fuck 😏" He's smug not in spite of having had help but because of it, and he's right to be!!!
#a brief deviation from the FR fixation#for the film at the foundation of it all To Me#mission: impossible#rogue nation#also he actively delegates key actions to benji#(turning on the gas#locking the box in the car trunk)#which i do love as small gestures of benji reclaiming agency#after lane tried to take it from him
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Shout out to the girls at Ulta who were so patient with my mom as you tried to explain to her that makeup and skincare are different from how they were 20 years ago (I’ve long been fighting that battle). You’re so welcome for telling her what you actually wanted to say to her, and your thoughts are valid, she’s just stubborn 💛
#Liz speaks#Liz’s personal tag#she hasn’t deviated from her routine in…yeah like twenty years#and I’ve been trying to get her to invest in actual skincare#she still hates makeup but knows she needs it from time to time or just in case#but she hates liquid foundation but wants the coverage#and I’m just standing there next to the consultant like…mama you need to make some decisions and or sacrifices.#and one of the other consultants passed me and whispered thank you#I was like it’s fine I’ll tell her what you actually want to say to her#you can too but I understand your hesitancy#we got her started though it’s fine
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if netflix makes Luo Ji non-chinese I'm going to throw myself off a fucking cliff
#*incoherent screaming*#if i have to see another “but netflix has to make the characters appeal to the bigger audience” comment im going to fucking lose it#i have a bar of deviation for adaptations. examples:#lotr: its all fine and dandy i love it#the hobbit: getting a little close to dangerous territory but i'll take it#dune: perfection#foundation: no wtf#rop: DO NOT FUCKING SPEAK TO ME OF THIS SHOW#i will still watch 3bd when it comes out#but I will be fucking PISSED if what i'm seeing about the characters is real#“give them personalities” ok yeah sure im fine with that#“the plot affects the entire population of the earth” ok sure but why are 75% of the cast non asian now.#“we need diversity! plus you need the audience to appeal to the audience” im going to fucking bite you. fuck off.#no hate to the actors i'm sure they did a great job its not their fault anyway#but seriously if they made luo ji non-chinese im actually going to fucking lose it#3 body problem#three body problem#remembrance of earth's past#netflix#actually if they made zhang beihai non-chinese as well then i'm just going to- *internal screaming*
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My little Menace to Society #1/Southern Thedas 💚
#Nadia Lavellan#le sketch tag#le OC tag#the first one is my favourite 💚💚#this girl is the foundation and blueprint for my art style and I love her forever for that#it’s also so funny to see how much I deviated from Inquisition’s in-game visuals for her (hair/clothes) to give her personality#vs how much I’m trying to stay in line for Amri in Veilguard 🤔#it was also nice to revisit her in my sketchbooks/dailies after like 6 years??? girl
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I used to always get mad at The Mountain Goats because they're like a Trojan horse to me. I see some banger lyrics on a tumblr post and go oh word 👀👌🏿 and then I go listen to the song and get slain by a Greek army, which in this case is my lack of interest in that musical genre
now imagine that Trojan horse is the latest Hozier album and maybe you can imagine how mad I am
#like of COURSE you had me at ''i carrion / icarian'' but then i went to listen to it 😭#listen i'm happy for him and for y'all but i think i knew this was gonna happen eventually#too many of his songs have lullaby vibes. like honkshoo type shit. i ofc listen to way more genres than just metal but#i think the visceral-feeling components that make metal what it is are indeed the foundation of my tastes.#like. i need my music to punch me in the soul in some way laksmfdlakjflkjg#it can't just be lyrically bc then that's just. that's just a poem. that's a different thing altogether#and yeah i CAN just read these lyrics as poems. which is what i'm doin. but they're NOT poems they're SONGS#anyway. it's too bad but at least the first album + would that i + sunlight will always exist#his accent cute tho i'll grant y'all that#(i also have only heard 3 songs so far and am assuming the rest of the album doesn't deviate that much. change my mind?)
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beg for me - ii

★ abstract: it’s ‘70s chicago and stack’s a single man on the prowl for his match. you’re about to give him more than he bargained for
content disclosure: smut, technical age gap, black!reader, fem!reader x stack, language, exposition chapter, canon deviation, ongoing series
author’s note: happy friday! part two is here! this part is longer than part one, but still what i would consider short. please let me know if longer is better, i'm open to keeping it this length or taking a little longer to write for longer chapters. in the words of pearline, let's see where the night takes us
word count: 1.7k
← previous part | next part →
Stack had been on the run for the last year or two, but not from trouble. From Mary (who more than qualified as trouble in her own right). Forty years deteriorated the foundation of their love, chipping away at all of the good and leaving behind a thick layer of resentment. They both knew it was over long before Stack had the courage to end it, putting them out of the misery of obligation. Everything unraveled when they were squatting in New York, and Stack had disappeared right into the Chicago air before things could get worse. He knew she was feeling it too, and yet she protested the break up so ardently that he almost recanted. He just couldn’t spend the rest of eternity with someone simply because he was bound to.
But trouble had its way of finding him, so much so that he should be used to it by now. Chicago was meant to be a pit stop on the way further out west until he met you. What was meant to be his last day in town, a celebratory send off, led him right to the bar you work at. It smelled of whiskey and sandalwood every time he walked in, and it took him a few times before realizing the sandalwood was wafting from you. Some oil he’d watch you reapply when you had a break from overbearing customers, once behind your ears and twice down your neck and chest. Cinnamon, the smoky spice of the sandalwood, and just enough rose to make it extra sweet. It made it hard for him to control himself around you— he already wanted to take a bite out of your neck, to taste the intoxicating flavor of your blood. Exposing himself to a bar full of people was a bit more trouble than he could chew, so he left you alone. Sort of.
Stack would’ve kept a respectable distance for as long as he lingered in Chicago until you made a move on him. He knew that you’d kept your eye on him every time he moseyed on into the bar, hat tilted and glasses obscuring the white film over his eyes. Without fail, he was dressed to the nines, suave and sexy with his signature touch of carmine. A cigarette or cigar wedged between his lips, smoke puffing out in circles around him. Stack knows how to command a room, and you were more than ready to give him your attention.
You were touchy with him, and that’s when he knew it wasn’t all in his head. Other customers had strictly professional interactions with you, and oftentimes you wouldn’t even bother looking at them; but with Stack, you came to life. Asking him questions about his life, playfully pushing at his arm if he cracked a joke, batting your doe eyes at him when handing him his drink (that you always made a little stronger than your boss would allow). The safe, respectable distance didn’t seem like something you wanted— and Stack always had a weakness for pretty women like you. Soft, sultry, and sanguine. Dark, thick hair pressed and flipped just like you saw Donna Summer do. It framed your face beautifully, the dark hue of your mane a breathtaking complement to your rich brown skin. A voice that he could loop on a record until his eardrums popped. Hips that he couldn’t help but imagine how they’d feel under his palms, how reactive you’d be to his touch. He could keep his mind running from dusk to dawn on the thought of you alone.
But Stack never ever considered falling for a human. For so long, he didn’t have to. Mary was meant to be his forever. The idea of starting fresh was mentally exhausting. His soul was nearly eighty-three years old, and he felt too old to go back to the drawing board. It was all too much, he thought, and a human was out of the question. Stack loves hard and falling in love with someone who’s still plagued by their biological clock was no different from self harm. He didn’t want to turn someone into a vampire with the intention of spending eternity together, because even he knew now that forever is fickle.
“Do it,” you moaned out, sensing his hesitation. “Bite me.”
The events of last night kept replaying as he sat in his living room, the low rumble of the radio heard from the next room over. Bite me? How had you figure it out? Had you been following him, had you seen him feed before? A chill ran through him at the perversion. Smoke was right; Stack had no idea how to watch his own back.
After your unexpected request, Stack kept fucking you like he hadn’t heard you. There was no way he could comply without investigating further. Up until then, you were a sexy stranger who he denied himself the pleasure of having. All of the gaps in his knowledge of you were empty, blank and waiting to be filled in. No one in his forty years of vampirism has ever sought him out, much less asking to be bitten. He didn’t even know what he wanted to ask you.
The bar you work at was opening soon, and he knew well enough that you’d be working. Probably wearing something to teasingly remind him of the position you were in just last night. A dress that was a bit too tight against your breasts, giving him the perfect view to admire. You were certainly gonna try to distract him tonight.
There was only one thing on your mind, and that was changing Stack’s. A brief look of bewilderment crossed his eyes when told him to bite you, but he pretended he heard no such demand since it was so outlandish. Who in their right mind would subscribe to such endless torment of bloodlust and bloodshed? If he had known…
“The usual?” You appear in front of him just as pretty as you wanna be. Powder blue shadow dusting your eyelids and a deep brown gloss to your lips. Your cheeks blushed with an orangish intensity that makes you look sun-kissed even indoors in the dim lighting. Simply put, you look absolutely stunning.
Stack gaps at you for a moment, stealing his eyes away from you to the row of liquor behind you the second he felt he was over doing it. He nods, “Ice cold beer.”
The beers were stored in the fridge right next to the bartop Stack was leaning over, effectively cutting your interaction time in half. Sigh. “I miss when you’d let me make you somethin’. Now, you’re running off with your drink before I can really talk to you.”
“And what would you need to really talk to me about?”
You popped the lid off the bottle, handing it over without pulling your hand away. “Maybe about how you’re acting like you didn’t hear me last night.”
His heart dropped to his stomach as you smirked at him, removing your hand from his embrace to grab his check to close his tab. Doing this so publicly, right in the open of the densely populated venue. Anyone could be listening, and you didn’t seem to care. You trusted the tranquil hum of your voice beneath the low chaos of the partygoers, and your eye contact coaxed the words from your lips to his ears. The molasses of your voice was dripping straight to his cock, and he already knew he was in dangerous territory.
If he wasn’t careful, he’d surrender to you entirely. His shoulders squared back as he found his confidence once more, taking the reins in his hands. “Alright, I’ll tell you what; if you still want this shit after I tell you everythin’ that come with it, I’ll turn you. But there’s a catch.”
You shrugged, wiping your hands on the tops of your thighs. “Figured as much.”
He pulled the toothpick out his mouth and fixed it between his fingers, leaning closer to you like his next words were a secret. “I’ll only give up the goods on dates, baby. You gon’ have to let me take you out on the town if you want me to talk.”
“Dates. You want… dates?”
“Classy. Romantic. Courtship,” He cleared his throat, looking away from you with a heavy sigh. “Or were you really just tryna fuck ‘n duck?”
A part of him couldn’t help but be insecure about his rustiness. Back in his day, he had game like no other. There was no doubt about it. But being in a committed relationship for nearly half a century had knocked his ego down more than a few notches. Sharing his body with someone hadn’t been something casual for him since before integration, and now that he was back at it, the game was different. He wanted to be crystal clear about his intentions.
You purse your lips, trying to read the poker face Stack puts on. Dating in exchange for the gift. It was messy, risking your heart in the hands of someone so indestructible. He could make you genuinely fall if you’re not careful, and love is too messy to get caught up in. Not now. As long as he keeps to his end of the bargain, you’ll be right on track according to schedule. “So when do we start?”
“There’s no turning back, you know.”
Whether he meant from his offer or from eternal life, you. weren’t sure. But either way, your answer was the same. “Good.” He was trying to scare you but it wouldn’t work. You’d heard plenty of stories, knew as much of the downsides as all of the good. Where others flinched with fear, your interest was piqued. The world you grew up in was too harsh to fear death. No one believed when you said there are fates worse than death, but you’d laid witness to it. So whatever Stack was trying to shield you from couldn’t be worse than what you’d already seen.
taglist: @rose-bliss @hrlzy @kinkythotsthoughts @browngirldominion
#sinners smut#sinners fanfiction#sinners#sinners movie#sinners 2025#sinners stack#black reader#elias stack moore#sinners spoilers#x black reader#x black!reader#black writer#bananafieldnotes#beg for me#fic: BFM
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I know people who don’t like alt fashion often think we are annoying or think we think too highly of ourselves/ are attention seeking. I don’t think they understand that more often than positive reactions people are genuinely cruel and sometimes violent about it. “Attention seeking”…The attention I get is getting harassed on the bus for the crime of wearing an outfit some stranger thinks is weird.
honestly. i was actually talking to some friends, several of whom are more visibly and openly queer than i am, at a party last month, and at ond point the topic turned to the struggle of choosing how to present yourself and weighing up the benefits of that against the potential risks of being identified as a queer person and hatecrimed for it - wearing a skirt outside the house when you're still in the early stages of transition, cutting your hair short, etc. and i expressed solidarity with them by pointing out that, although i wasn't trying to compare our experiences because theirs were undeniably more serious, i understood to an extent what they were going through because i've also experienced harassment for the way that i dress and my general outward physical appearance. which led to us discussing that, actually, although being free to express fundamental parts of your identity in a society where those aspects of you are marginalised and oppressed is without question more of a human rights issue than being able to explore alternative fashion styles, they're both rooted in the same foundational attitude - that being that any deviation from the norm is perceived as a threat by some people, who may decided to uphold that status quo with violence because they're confident that the majority will support them and blame the victim for inviting it upon themselves through their "lifestyle choices". there's a reason so many alt fashion styles have their origin in specific subcultures - they're a way of showing belonging, but also a way of openly demonstrating difference, and rejection of certain normative ideals. which is important to understand if you have a genuine interest in alt fashion - you will be perceived as making a provocative statement by some people, whether that's your intention or not. it's good knowledge to have if it's something you want to commit to.
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In the aftermath of my big post about censorship, multiple people have left comments that boil down to, "it's okay to show heavy topics in fiction as long as they're portrayed as bad."
Let's take a quick look at an excerpt from the full ext of the Hays Code, shall we?
No picture should lower the moral standards of those who see it. This is done: (a) When evil is made to appear attractive, and good is made to appear unattractive. (b) When the sympathy of the audience is thrown on the side of crime, wrong-doing, evil, sin.The same thing is true of a film that would throw sympathy against goodness, honor, innocence, purity, honesty. note: Sympathy with a person who sins, is not the same as sympathy with the sin or crime of which he is guilty. We may feel sorry for the plight of the murderer or even understand the circumstances which led him to his crime; we may not feel sympathy with the wrong which he has done. The presentation of evil is often essential for art, or fiction, or drama. This in itself is not wrong, provided: (a) That evil is not presented alluringly. Even if later on the evil is condemned or punished, it must not be allowed to appear so attractive that the emotions are drawn to desire or approve so strongly that later they forget the condemnation and remember only the apparent joy of the sin. (b) That thruout the presentation, evil and good are never confused and that evil is always recognized clearly as evil. (c) That in the end the audience feels that evil is wrong and good is right
This is the same Hays Code that supported Nazis. This is the same Hays Code that forced Jewish artists out of Hollywood. This is the same Hays Code that targeted artists of color, queer artists, female artists, any artist who deviated from the white American Catholic ideal. And it was explicitly Catholic, which I explained in further depth here.
The idea that art has to have a clear moral, which lines up with the dominant morals of white American Christianity, is foundational to the Hays Code. If you sound like the Hays Code, you need to re-evaluate.
Censorship and moral codes enforced on art are never used for anything other than oppression. The second you try to dictate what is and isn't allowable in art, you side with people who will enforce those rules on marginalized people with no mercy and no hesitation.
Censorship does not create healthy relationships with media, even the censorship you might be tempted to think of as "good censorship."
(And, as usual, being an independent censorship researcher does very little to pay my bills. Kick me a tip on Ko-Fi or pledge to me on Patreon if you want to support my work! <3)
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“'TILL WE SEE STARS”
zane phillips, nico greetham, drew starkey, taylor zakhar perez, tom holland, and oliver stark x male reader.
𝐒𝐌𝐔𝐓— fic [ 14.7k ] 〳 part one
𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒—male reader〳make sure to read part one!〳established relationship 〳 collage!au 〳jealous!zane 〳 sexual content: everyone is a top, bottom!reader, cum dumpster!reader, double penetration, gang bang, rough!sex, kissing, spitting, breeding, cumplay, bukkake, blowjobs, handjobs, praising, body worshipping, lots and lots of filthy sex!
You didn’t notice right away.
In your defense, Zane had always been exceptionally distracting, and that would only become harder to refute since you’d been something to him.
Rephrase that—someone.
Someone special, someone of importance, someone that meant something.
You’ve had doubts. Who wouldn’t when even your own friends looked at you with such bewilderment upon introducing him to the small group. Nerds and Jocks don’t mix; a childish verity you and your friends held with high regard since being hit in the face with a ball happened one too many times to brush those instances off as mere coincidences. That, and your snickering high school classmates would since provide you a whole new perspective on that matter.
But you went on to prove your friends wrong, prove that your doubts were meager tricks that only persisted to keep you from exploring out of your comfort zone—from living life to its fullest possibilities. The house that had once shielded you from all cruelties the world and its inhabitants brought with them began to crumble from its residence on a clifftop. Parts that made up the foundation sacrificed themselves in pursuit to bring you home. Wood, stone, red bricks; they catapulted into the ocean, swam on the surface, floated for air, and dived in the deep sea. Farther and farther, they searched for you, hopeful for any signs of life that signaled for your immediate rescue.
Instead, what they found was baffling.
It was you, but it wasn’t you at the same time. Something changed—this growing assurance in your disposition, holding onto a man, large and more than capable to protect, a threat to the house that had kept you safe since birth.
Betrayal, what happened to my son? My boy? My sweet boy?
You could hear the rage in their authoritative voice, but you’ve grown to realize their awful cadence had only been a tactic for you to come back—come back to them—to scare you into being the perfect boy they’ve raised you to be.
Every kiss from the man ignited a fire within you. He forged you with strength, with fortification, with affection—and you uttered a strong defiance, then watched the foundation disintegrate before your very eyes, piece by piece.
***
There was always so much care in Zane’s palms, yet he’d proven you to be exceptionally attentive when he was upset. Like he was trying to persuade you from deviating too far into his worries.
It was embarrassing to admit how long it took for you to piece it altogether—why he was often in a mood, or why he was adamant in making you stay the night at his apartment. You never pondered about it for too long as it never amounted to much. All it took was a night in his bed, watching his favorite shows, kissing and fondling to take his mind off of what was festering inside, and everything returned back to normal. A stressful day at work or practice, you’d reckon as you watched him sleep on your chest, his gentle snores beckoning you to your slumber.
But you began noticing a pattern. It happened every Thursday and Friday. You’d come to his place after tutoring, and he would greet you by the entrance with the most fulfilling kiss. Grappled by his arms around your waist, pulling you flush to his chest, and your lips raptured by his.
“Well, greetings to you too! I brought dinner.”
“That can wait… I missed you,” he would say before swooping you off your feet and fleeing with you into his bedroom.
At the least provocation, he’d proven all too willing to lick into your mouth and shove his greedy hands beneath your shirt. It was a growing tendency that you weren’t inclined to draw to a close because frankly—there was nothing to complain about, other than the cold takeout.
As observant as you usually were, you blamed yourself for not puzzling Zane’s growing possessiveness to your tutoring sooner.
Or maybe you were turning a blind eye, because you anticipated the magnificent nights he’d bestow on you. On those nights, Zane was especially keen to make you take all of him—every inch, every seed, every feeling.
“Swallow it all. I don’t want to see a drop left, baby.” “M-mmfngh—“
All in all, it was beginning to become clear that those days were bothering him. You could feel the tension in the air, the heaviness in your gut as Zane swelled inside of you for the second time of the night, two days in a row.
It was beyond the fact that you tutored—he was fine with that.
It was who you were tutoring.
On Thursdays, you could feel his delusional need to investigate who’d been in your mouth. Tom? Oliver? Taylor? He would suckle on your tongue until you reeled back for a breath, and even then, he wouldn’t stop licking into your mouth.
On Fridays, his hands wouldn’t leave your body. They covertly searched high and low, back to front, squeezing, pulling, roaming, pushing, for any marks, for any evidence of Nico’s presence, of Drew’s marks—but the only blemishes were Zane’s from the day before. A love bite to your neck, and another one to the left of your hip bone.
No one.
You both knew it was the truth—your loyalty to him, but Zane was a madman who was being fed with delusions beyond your control, and in turn, it gifted you the most passionate lover only you could’ve fantasized in novels.
“Oh, g-god. Right there. Don’t go faster, Zane. Don’t slow down. Just like that—“ “Yeah? You like my cock wrecking your pretty hole? Just. Like. That?”
***
“Would it make you feel better if you were with me?” you mentioned out of the blue, the show you two had been watching finally rolled the credits.
“Huh? What are you talking about?” Zane averted his gaze toward you, blindly reaching for the remote and switching the TV off. Then, he pulled you closer into his arms and pressed a kiss to the top of your head. His nose buzzed with delight at the scent of your shampoo.
“Well…” he watched you ponder—your gaze avoidant and wandering unlike the abrupt tension he felt in your body. He opened his arm out of concern, allowing you to properly gather yourself with the newfound space. You sat up and resumed explaining carefully, “I know you don’t like it when I’m… with your friends—alone. Embarrassingly enough, it just hit me—and… well, you seem off these days. And I think it’s because of that.”
It was like being caught in a lie. Not one of those major ones that Zane knew he would commit from beginning to end, but a white lie—a vaulted truth to spare your feelings, even if it meant that it was festering and poisoning him on the inside.
It was an unspoken promise. A natural response. A firm conviction that he should bear your troubles and worries in solitude.
After all, he was your boyfriend, your protector.
“What? Babe—no, what? Have I been acting different? I don’t know. I guess work’s gotten busier, so I guess that could explain…” He was teetering on the edge of revelation or secrecy, stammering until he was one step away from falling.
Zane was never a great liar.
“Come on. You can be honest. Is it because you don’t trust me? Because we study at the library and—“
“No, I absolutely trust you. Don’t say that.”
“I mean, it’s probably weird for me to be hanging out with them—in a way. It makes sense that you’d want to be there, so I get it if you feel hurt or disappointed or—“
“Babe, it’s not—“
“They’re your friends, not mine. I mean, I don’t think they see me as a friend anyway? I’m their tutor, and that’s how it should be…”
“(M/N), wait a second—“
Your hands were theatrical. Grandiose. If you had a symphony playing with you, they’d be performing with fervor, sweating until the grasp on their instruments had slipped at the nearing crescendo, and the audience would gasp altogether to fill the void of abrupt silence.
“I promise, Zane. All I do is give them assignments, like I did with you—well, not like I did with you. We were a little different, weren’t we… but with them? I-it’s like how I tutor everyone else and…!“
You suddenly stood up from the couch, clearly exasperated by the lack of words that could properly support your claims.
“Hey, hey…” he quelled you with a gentle tug to your hand, silently urging you back to his side with a consoling grin. You huffed, sucking in what he could presume to be more self-destructing words, and dramatically let the tension on your shoulders push your body onto his lap.
It wasn’t the right moment to notice, but would you kill him if he felt more inclined to annoy you in the future if this was how charming you always looked? The answer would probably be no. You had a tendency to forgive—a little too easily.
“Then what’s wrong? Is it my fault? Over-cooked your chicken? Ate your protein bar without asking? Got a stain on your hoodie, but I think I washed it out…?” Frowning, you stared back up at him through your eyelashes, chin sunken to your chest, and completely hopeless.
For a moment, he was speechless. It always took one glance from you for Zane to lose his train of thought. Even when you felt all kinds of emotions, there was still that glint in your eyes that never failed to make his heart feel like it was about to burst.
“Kinda is your fault. I mean, if you hadn’t been born with that handsome face of yours, or been blessed with brains and kindness, we wouldn’t be in this situation.”
“Be serious!” Zane felt your body tense up again. You were about to pull yourself off his lap before he rested a hand to your chest and gently pushed you back. “So, there is a problem…”
“It’s my problem, (M/N),” he began soothing your chest in small circles. The cotton soft in his palm before it was inevitably delighted with the firmness of your chest when he slipped a hand under your shirt, resuming his caress.
“I might not have a lot of experience in dating, but I’ve watched a lot of films to know that partners help each other when either one of them have a problem.”
Guilt was quickly catching up to him. Zane could feel its presence looming over his head. Like smog, heavy and thick, and even if it had waned into thin air—completely obliterated to the back of his mind—Zane was confident he would be suffering from the ramifications of it in the future.
“God… what am I going to do with you,” he dipped forward and buried his head into your body, using your shirt to muffle his conflicted groans.
It was those eyes of yours again. He couldn’t bear to face you with the secrets he’d been withholding, but he was already in this predicament. Ignoring it, even after being called out on his behavior, would just make things worse than if he would just tell you the truth.
He waited for seconds. Then seconds turned into minutes. Then those remaining minutes were spent sighing at the softest strokes you brushed through his hair, to occupy the silence, or to break the tension between you two. Either way, his heart felt heavier despite your comforting attempts.
With a mutter, Zane turned his head towards you and looked truthfully into your eyes, “Yeah, I’m jealous.”
You immediately perked up to join him at his side again, taking his hand into yours, “Zane, I promise—nothing happens…”
“No, I know, (M/N). I trust you. I mean, what can I say? I miss you. Our schedule isn’t aligning like I thought it would, and it feels like I’m seeing you less since you’ve taken Tom, Drew, Taylor… all of them for tutoring.”
“I can cut back? Maybe arrange the meetings to fit your schedule, and that way we can—“
“No, absolutely not. I’m not going to be that type of boyfriend.”
“Well, I can’t just sit here and watch you suffer.” Zane watched you play with his fingers, clamping your hand to his, then unclasping as his thoughts prolonged another silence.
“You have no idea, (M/N). I… God, it’s all fucked up.” He rubbed his face to comfort himself, groaning into his palms before taking your hands into his again.
Nothing calmed him more than simply holding you.
“What? It’s just about us not spending enough time together, right? Maybe I’m too optimistic, but that seems like something that can be easily resolved…”
“No—I mean, yes. That’s the problem, but it isn’t the main problem…”
“Then… what is?”
From the corner of his eye, he watched you physically brace yourself, straightening your posture like the suspense had been literally killing you and your insides. You took one deep exhale, preparing yourself for the worst while Zane fished for his phone, and scrolled through his messages.
He began explaining.
Taking tutoring lessons was the last thing on the team’s mind. For Zane and Nico, it was a simple affair. Their grades were dropping like flies, and their coach didn’t like the sight of that, or the consequences that would follow. If they didn’t take their grades seriously, how could Coach trust them to lead the team? How can they lead the team with discipline—if they severely lacked it themselves? Zane was warned of this predicament for multiple semesters, and it was only recently when he began taking it seriously.
He’d never received a letter from his coach before, and as laughably traditional as it was, he’ll forever remember the sinking feeling in his chest when he read the last paragraph of his coach’s handwriting:
Fix your grades by the end of the semester, or you’re out. No more second chances. You’re great, but not that great for me to put your future in jeopardy. Sorry, I should’ve been harder on you.
Without much arguing, he did as he was told. Week by week, month by month, Zane and Nico’s grades improved tremendously, and the threat of being kicked off the wrestling team was delayed for another semester. However, as much as the guys were impressed by their success, Zane couldn’t owe the credit to solely himself. You were a major part of his triumphant journey, and the team would since become greatly fond of you and your saving contributions to the group.
Maybe it was inspiring to watch Zane and Nico dig themselves out of a rut, an underdog story that everyone loved rooting for in the movies. Or maybe it was some kind of unspoken brotherhood, where if one was struggling, then the other would join them in their agony to establish some type of rapport. Because soon after, Zane’s teammates found themselves in an awfully similar situation to him and solicited your service.
But Zane knew his teammates.
Zane knew that this decision was completely out of left field. Taylor, Tom, Drew, Oliver; it was strange to see all of them suddenly feel the need to seek out a tutor—specifically you out of all the available people—to help them with their studies.
It was odd to listen to them complain that their grades had been dropping, apparently lower and lower with every passing week.
And again, Zane knew his teammates.
He spent every waking second with them since they’d met each other as freshmen; aligned every course with the guys so he’d come into class knowing at least one person; visited each other’s house on semester breaks because why the hell not—it was on the drive home. For god’s sake, all of their parents knew the team by government name, siblings if they had any, and even their own aspirations in life.
They were teammates, but they were also best friends.
So, Zane had every right to call this entire arrangement as bullshit.
They weren’t struggling with their grades. Tom and Taylor were honor students. Oliver was a teaching assistant. Drew was interning for a marketing firm that made Zane’s eyes hurt when he snooped through Drew’s emails, and looked at the qualifications for the rather imposing position.
Bullshit, bullshit, bullshit.
They were fucking with him.
Or to better clarify—trying to fuck with you.
Trying to fuck you.
It was Zane’s fault. He wasn’t clear that he was actually serious about his relationship with you, and that unlike his previous relations, there was no sharing with the team. All hands were off—should be off—and the only ones you’d be holding were Zane’s.
No.
That didn’t sound right.
It was their fault. It had to be their fault. They were the ones talking about you like they had never seen a pretty boy in their life, like they had never seen a man sharing this dreadful place we call Earth. A man with those pretty eyes, smiling with that pretty mouth, frowning with those pretty cheeks, typing with those pretty hands—the team would practically brand you as theirs with every session they’d return from studying with you, and they boasted about it all to Zane’s face.
Maybe it was his fault after all.
Zane loved bragging about you. It wasn’t something he often did with his previous partners, but something about you changed him. Zane loved showing your selfies off to his friends. One day he’d marvel how soft your lips were, the next he’d go on a tangent about what an incredibly kind person you were for finding someone’s lost dog. It was all arbitrary. As long as it was framed around you, the topics bounced from your looks to your body to your personality, and to his surprise, his friends would chime in too.
Increasingly more, as they would get to know you following every meeting.
The worst part was that Zane allowed it to happen and found himself encouraging this behavior he was scrutinizing. The group chat was complete evidence of his participation, and with every message, he could physically feel the jury slipping out of his favor.
Drew: I shouldn’t have doubted you, Zane. There’s something about your boy’s eyes…
Tom: Oh god. Does he always look at you like that, Zane? I don’t know how you can handle it. I have to physically hold my crotch to keep myself from coming in my pants.
Taylor: Can we talk about his lips, though? They’re so plump. I couldn’t help but stare at them. He does that cute thing where he chews on his lip when he’s grading.
Oliver: I wonder what he does when his mouth is filled. Zane? Care to give us a hint, please? Or shall we give him a visit and demo for ourselves…?
Zane: Hm, I’ll just say that… (M/N)’s learning very quickly on how to breathe through his nose and relax his throat. Though, that doesn’t stop the noises from coming out of his mouth.
Nico: Always had a thing for nerds… He suck you off with his glasses on or no?
Zane: On.
Drew: Oh, c’mon…
Taylor: Shit. I’m getting hard.
Tom: Fuck. Me too.
Nico: Lucky bastard… It should’ve been me!
Oliver: Never mind. This is so much better than what I could’ve imagined.
Zane laid it all out onto the table for you. His phone was a bar of gold in your hand as you scrolled and read through the messages pertaining you between him and his friends. The more recent the texts were, the more explicit and brazen.
Taylor talked about a dream that he had of you, where you allowed him to kiss you wherever he pleased if he got a question right. This was as innocent it would get. His hand would be shoved into your pants while he would kiss at your neck, licking into your whimpers.
Tom texted about the random hard-ons he’d sport when he was with you. Something as simple as watching you lick your lips was enough to get him off for the night.
Drew daydreamed about you giving him a hand job in the library. The rush of being nearly caught, and the flood of embarrassment blooming on your neck and face resulted him coming within your fist. You’d hover your free hand beneath his cock, to catch the flood of cum, because you were a kind person who didn’t want to make a public mess. And because you were such a kind person, you’d slurp his cum off your palm, right then and there, before Drew’s very eyes.
Nico was the most yearning. Perhaps it was because he always played second fiddle to Zane’s leadership, and that reflected onto his fantasies, but he missed hearing your praises. Praises that consisted of how good he was at solving this problem; how proud you were when he went out of his way to do more problems than what was assigned to him; how nice he felt when he pushed his warm cock inside of you for the first time. You’d overwhelm him with so many compliments, so many kind words, that it wouldn’t take much for him to come inside of you.
Oliver was a brazen man. He spoke without thought, without a filter, and if it came to Zane’s decision, he would want to publish a book full of Oliver’s lewd fantasies about you. He wanted to fuck you. Point blank period. It wasn’t up for debate. He would make you take him in the car if he could. Bent over the backseat, while he pounded into you out in the parking lot, or maybe in the woods if you preferred seclusion. And when he was done with you, he’d leave you there dripping, inhaling another smoke to work up another appetite, as if the image of his cum leaking out of you and down your legs hadn’t strung up his cock like a puppet with every passing second.
“It’s a lot, I know,” Zane’s voice broke you from the spell that was his friends’ fantasies. You blinked rapidly to ward off the explicit images festering. He was reading them with you, the illusions silently feeding you and him simultaneously. “Listen, if you want to call it quits, I understand. But I just—I love… seeing them talk about you like that. It makes me… so proud. Powerful—knowing that they can’t ever lay their hands on you, as long as I’m in the picture.”
“But… you said you were jealous? I don’t understand—” You fidgeted uncomfortably against him. Zane took no mind to it, especially since you seem to be taking the information better than he’d thought, but your constant squirming was beginning to be a cause of concern. He blindly opened his arm for you, allowing you to snuggle into his side.
“Yeah, well… I guess riling your friends up and feeding into their fantasies has some consequences. I like it when they talk about you to me, but… I don’t know, I guess I imagine what they would do to you if you were alone with them and it makes me worried, yet aroused? It’s… confusing, I know. I don’t get it either—Babe, are you okay? You keep moving.“
“No, continue—it’s just—“ you groaned, pressing closer to his side and crossing your legs. “Is that why you’ve been extra affectionate? I mean, you always have been, but I swear, I think we have sex almost every day—or is that normal? Not that I don’t love it. I don’t want you to get tired of me or something.”
“First off, never going to happen. I could never get tired of you. And… it might be normal depending on who you’re asking… Might be our new normal, if I’m being honest. I can’t help that you’re so irresistible—okay, what’s going on—” For a couple more seconds, Zane endured you fiddling with the blanket on your lap before suddenly tugging it off and freeing you of your agony, or whatever was the reason of your constant writhing.
He glanced down at your lap, and your reflex was quick to hide it—whatever was near your pelvis. It was hard seeing you in the dark with the TV and his phone switched off. The moonlight filtered through the blinds on his windows, but it was only enough to highlight parts of your face, not enough to illuminate the entire living room.
Without a warning, Zane reached in between your thighs and frisked whatever that had come into contact with his palm. He raised an eyebrow at the sudden hitch of your breath, feeling nothing but the leather of the couch in his palm—until he moved it higher, toward your lack of an attempt at shielding, and pushed your hand aside.
“Oh,” it didn’t take long to guess what was in the palm of his hand. He could trace the shape of it in his sleep if he was asked to. Write the exact measurements as he recalled numerous nights with you if he was quizzed on it, even if majority of his calculations relied on his grip.
Zane knew you very well, and he especially knew what he was squeezing—gently kneading until those familiar sounds poured out of you like freshly squeezed orange juice.
Ah, there it was.
It was his boy’s cock.
“Don’t get mad—“ you warned, pausing Zane’s kneads with a gentle grasp, but he persisted, only challenging the tightness in your shorts in the end.
“Why would I be mad? You’re not mad?” his voice traveled ticklishly to your ear. He’d pulled you closer, whispering while his hand was all synonyms of tantalizing.
“Is it wrong to say that I’m not? Is this was what you felt like…? I’m confused and horny, and it’s all a mess, Zane…” you groaned when his hand into the leg opening, eagerly reaching for your stiff arousal.
“God, sorry—let’s just… talk about this later. Fuck, come on.”
“Y-yeah, good idea.”
***
“They never heard yours.”
It was cool and lulling—the baby wipe Zane was cleaning you down with. Just when you thought Zane couldn’t have gotten more attractive, the concentrated look on his face while he wiped the sweat and sticky residue off your torso made your flaccid cock twitch, his biceps bulging like they were still strenuous from holding you against the wall a few minutes prior.
Zane raised a curious brow at your vagueness and your renewed arousal altogether before chucking the wipes in a bin and tucking himself to your side. “What do you mean?”
At the advance of his arms around your waist, you turned in your position to face him, pulling him close by the hips. “Your fantasy. They all told you about theirs, but you never did. Just makes me curious… on what yours is?”
Zane pondered, his thumb pondering with him as it chased after an internal beat, a rhythm over your lower back. In the meantime, you surveyed his face, like you always did post-sex. His moles were attractive, his eyebrows and lips deliciously full, and his eyes—beautiful windows to his beautiful soul.
You were the luckiest man on earth.
“You can’t judge me, all right?”
He jolted you back from your studying, an uncertain air emanating from his disposition.
You took his cheek in your hand and squeezed him with assertion. “I would never!”
Your constant kneading made him loosen up. He exhaled deep, looking dubious, but compiled trust into your eyes in the end—because it was just a fantasy, right?
One.
BIg.
Fucking.
Dream.
Finally, Zane confessed.
“Gangbang…”
“Oh…!”
***
Zane didn’t know what to expect. He had to admit that you looked uneasy when he brought up the topic of having a safe word. As basic as it was, the traffic light system was ideal as vanilla as it was, especially for something as daunting as someone’s first gangbang.
Plus, you were getting a little too creative with the safe words.
“What about… peanut butter cup..?” “Eh… think that’s a little too long, babe.” “Ghost!” “You might freak Tom out. He apparently had an ‘apparition’ back at his grandma’s house.” “Sheep?” “Sounds like ‘shit,’ which can be misconstrued as “shit, keep fucking me!"” “Hm… pickle?” “Gross! You know I hate pickles!” “You don’t eat words, Zane!”
As hopeful and convincing Zane could be, the last thing he would’ve thought was you agreeing to this—without much hesitation too, might he add.
“Can you move okay?” Zane stepped aside for you to walk from one end of his bedroom to the other. It wasn’t much distance, but it wasn’t like you needed an ample amount of space to begin with.
You took the open floor to demonstrate your ability to walk. It seemed simple enough. You did it every day. One foot after the other, step by step, leisurely and calmly and—
“Oh—“ you stiffened after the first step and froze in place. One leg methodically moved back and forth to gauge the restrictive mobility. “It feels a little… tight?”
“We can go a size smaller, but it should be a little uncomfortable. Plus, you’re not going to be walking much? Hopefully…” Zane calmly reasoned, maneuvering you like a mannequin. His hand was searching high and low for any physical indications that a butt plug was lodged inside of you—pressing when the flange toy protruded a centimeter more than he had liked.
Your breath hitched and then you shook your head, deciding the size was adequate adequate enough, and resumed walking normally. One couldn’t have noticed any oddities, as long as they ignored the rigidness of your posture.
The feeling came out of the blue—you wanted to impress them. After all, you were the star of the night. Zane’s confession had been simmering in your thoughts for a few days, especially one comment when he described how powerful he felt knowing his friends wanted you, but couldn’t have you.
You wanted to make Zane proud. If the humblest of all brags turned his friends into complete brutes, you couldn’t imagine how they would act when they all have had a turn to explore your body inside and out, and never again. Dogs. Monsters. Yet they’d worship every sovereign step that Zane would take like they were indebted to his graciousness, like they were his men of labor, all for one more night with you again.
You wanted more than to make Zane proud. You wanted to make him feel like a king.
Three knocks at the door, and the long-awaited fantasy was a door away from becoming a reality. You tailed stiffly after Zane, the kiss he quickly granted you before jogging to the entrance like a spell to your pursuit—like a hex to the tension Zane knew all-so-well.
Zane looked back once more, a nod of assurance padded by a bright smile, and you exhaled out the tightness in your chest.
Let the party begin.
***
“Let’s make it… easier for you, babe. Warm you up instead of abruptly starting?”
“Yeah—that sounds fine to me.”
“You’ll spin the bottle, and whoever it lands on can initiate the first step. No more than a minute. Then, you’ll spin the bottle again—second person goes, so-on and so-on. Sound good? More organized that way, right? And you can get a feel of everyone’s… vibes without it being overwhelming. Fellas? Any objections?”
“Sounds good to me, Zane.”
“Uh-huh.”
“Yeap.”
“Mm-hm.”
“No complaints here.”
The slower the bottle spun, the faster your heart beat. Your eyes moved from one man to the next, as if you were the empty beer bottle itself. The group formed a circle in the middle of the living room, small but enough to accommodate for seven men: You, Zane, Taylor, Oliver, Nico, Tom, and Drew; in that order of the circumference. Other than the guys catching up with you—small talk about your tutoring, their assignments, dinner, new dogs, and whatnot—conversations were kept to a minimum.
All seven of you knew why you were here altogether, and they weren’t keen on drawing it out for any longer.
“You guys just came back from the gym?” Zane asked after taking a sip of his beer. You reached for his bottle, feeling parched, and he passed it to you with a composing grin, lingering to watch your expression sour as the bubbles tickled your throat.
“Yeah—was going to hit the showers, but then we would’ve been late,” Taylor explained, and the rest of the guys nodded in between sips of their beers, comically attentive to the slowing bottle. You took a silent whiff of the heavy musk radiating off of the five men; your dick twitched.
“Oh shit, who’s it gonna be?! First stud of the night!” Tom bowed his body forward and began drumming the floor in faux suspense. You laughed and joined in on the increasing drum rolls, the others including yourself finding his anticipation infectious as laughter spread amongst the group like a virus—the seven pairs of hands drumming on the floor altogether being part of the symptom.
There was nothing to be worried about, was there?
This was going to be fun.
A blast.
A bang.
The bottle slowed, passing pairs of bare feet in its rotation. Multiple postures straightened as if they could compel gravity to direct the bottle towards them, but then Drew’s slumped when it passed him, then Taylor’s, and a domino effect of lost hope was rippled—all except for one.
A chorus of oohs broke out when it stopped on Nico—Zane’s right-hand man. It must’ve been an inside joke between all six of them because Oliver made a comment about how Nico was finally having his moment, and they all erupted into another fit of laughter, cutting the tension in the air one chuckle at a time.
“You’re up!” Zane beckoned with a nod. You took another glance at him, nothing of concern, but rather to alleviate his own worries by the way he suddenly gathered his hold on your hand, and then pecked him on the lips and cheek. He smiled, returning the peck onto your lips before whispering into your ear, “Show ‘em what a lucky man I am.”
“Whew, all right..!” Nico propped himself up with a hop.
Nico made his way towards you and pulled you to the middle of the circle. Even knowing that you read his messages, he still carried that dashing smile like it was a weapon. One that regularly caused destruction on many hearts, one that charged your own like it was a battery—you just now discovered how disruptive dimples could be.
He was a sly man. Two-faced even, and you anticipated to discover this other side of him that he’d been reluctant to show.
“Hi—again,” Nico whispered through a smile. You found it charming how he couldn’t contain his glee. Dimple to dimple, they were like two separate smiles of their own, bracketing the salient beam from widening any further.
You wanted to peek over at Zane when Nico pressed his nose to yours, taunting himself—taunting you with the suspense of his soft-looking lips. But Nico’s hand on your nape was absolute and refusing, holding you like you were a weakening star—his dying wish, and made you fix his eyes on him, as he had done for you all this time. “Sorry you had to find out this way, but… I have a crush on you.”
“No—it’s fine. It’s why we’re here, right?” You braced one hand over Nico’s lap and the other on his broad chest. Sturdy, well-defined muscles graced your palm with every caress.
“Yeah… what a way to reciprocate my feelings…”
Slowly, you felt Nico’s breath warm your lips before they were taken hostage by his pair of reds, mirroring the close of his eyes upon noticing. The room fell to a silence, watching like hawks, closing in between the two bodies for front seating of the kiss.
He started gentle; soft lips moving against softer lips, careful to avoid hitting your glasses, your gasps and his groans filling your mouth with fulfillment. One hand of Nico’s maintained on your nape while the other rested on the small of your back, to pull you closer, to feel the skin hidden beneath polycotton. His hand was warm as he roamed; big as he held at nothing but something all at once; inquisitive as his fingers would occasionally dip into the waistband of your shorts.
The longer it goes on, the harder the kiss was. Nico’s mouth was illusive, now hard and abrasive to train your mouth open, and then stay open as he licked into your mouth and explored with his curious tongue. Your ears perked at an envious comment from one of the guys, but it was quickly hushed following the sound of your moans. Nico wrapped his mouth around your tongue and sucked with ardency, mining any possible sounds out of you like they were Earth’s greatest treasure. Your tongue reeled back in growing desire to tick a kink off of Nico’s bucket list, smooching a few more times on the lips, holding his cheek, and then whispering into his warm mouth with a bated breath as his hand halted its lone venture up the opening of your shorts.
“You’re a great kisser, Nico…”
“Time!”
A timer sang from your side, and a web of spit tailed your lips as you pulled away, letting your gaze linger to catch Nico’s heightened arousal in his eyes before returning to your seat.
“Fuck..,” chuckles spread from man to man when Nico returned, exhaling and shaking all sorts of trembles out of his body. Oliver and Tom aided with hard smacks to Nico’s back, sharing the thrill of the kiss simultaneously.
“Was that okay?” You whispered to Zane, fixing your glasses while the rest of the guys debriefed on Nico’s fulfillment. A collection of comments such as, “I’m fucking jealous…”, “Did you see the way he looked at you? Fucking sexy…”, “God, I hope it’s me next,” made you squirm in your seat.
Your mission from all of this was to make Zane proud, but it wouldn’t hurt if you gifted yourself a slight ego-boost in the meantime, right?
“You did… fucking perfect. I think you’re riling them up—riling me up too, actually,” he muttered, briefly maneuvering your hand to demo the boner in his shorts before returning back to his duties as the host. “Okay, settle down! Babe? Next spin, please? Think the team’s getting a little antsy.”
You surveyed the room again. Nico was subtly pushing down on his crotch while Drew, Tom, and Oliver were casual about it, openly massaging themselves through their shorts, their eyes wandering towards you with repose. If you hadn’t had the decency to look away, you could’ve indulged in their thick prints for a little longer.
But duty called. You reached for the bottle and spun it, bating the men with the suspense of who was going to be next in line in warming you up.
The crown of the bottle stopped parallel to Taylor, who was slouched on his elbows like he’d been expecting it—rigged it with his mind if telekinesis was more than hypothetical. He greeted you with provocation, flashing his brows and a smug smile all at once, then a wink, before joining you in the middle. You always found him intimidating. It was probably those eyelashes of his. They were always fluttering, even when you would go over his notes—he would blink and stare once knowing it was effective enough to render you speechless. As naive as it sounded—it felt like Taylor was adept to anything and everything, including whatever he was about to do to you.
And you were absolutely correct in that hypothesis—because Taylor immediately began stripping you down. It was inevitable, but you didn’t expect all of you to be bared within the second spin.
“Seems like Taylor’s on a mission.” Oliver laughed, catching your briefs and taking a whiff at it before passing it to the group. One by one, you watched each person press their nose to the center of your briefs, and inhale. Comments on the smell of your arousal made your dick twitch again. Harder, when Drew and Oliver engrossed themselves in the fine stain of pre-cum and took multiple lingering whiffs in hounding the sweet musk again. You’d think you laced them with some kind of potion—an elixir that amplified their excitement through every vein in their body, from hands to cock.
From head to toe, your clothes came off and were tossed aside, and you let Taylor’s spirit of inquiry explored as he pleased. Sprawling your arms and legs out like he was frisking you, smacking the back of your thighs like he was a butcher examining the quality of fresh meat. You groaned when he loitered at your naked body, noticing the constellation of goosebumps on your chest to the dimples on your backside—all with a glaze of his hand. Taylor’s fingers followed every contour of your body—from spine to muscle—studying you and the smallest reactions you’d spare him with pleased eyes as he smacked, kissed, smoothed, and licked the canvas that was made of skin and bone. You were a sculpture carved by the Renaissance, and Taylor was a curator, assessing your value through the warmth of his mouth, the slick of his tongue, and the kneads of his hands.
“Oh, what do we have here?” His mouth was on your stomach, closely tending to the warm skin with kisses, while his hand was on your rump, prodding at the plug that had been confined in you for the entirety of the day. “Guys, jackpot. (M/N) came with a surprise.”
“I-it wasn’t my idea—“ Heat rose high to your neck when Taylor turned you around and showed your ass off to the ogling group of men. While he was at it, he mind as well brand you with a price tag—right on your ass cheeks, where Taylor smacked each side once, massaging them with a firm knead, and spread you open.
“Holy shit…” Tom muttered while he stood on his knees, taking in the sight of your plugged hole. You impulsively squeezed your thighs together, covering your growing erection at the marveling shared between the six men. There was a wonder in Zane’s expression, resembling the first time he undressed you before his very eyes.
“You like teasing us, don’t you?” Drew said when your glutes tensed, and the room hummed with the soft susurrus of agreement. “Pretty thick ass too, jesus—“
“Time,” Zane stopped the alarm after a ring, sighing in between kneads to his bulge.
Five of the guys collectively groaned from the cliff-hanger while Taylor gave your hard ass a smack in midst of returning to his seat. “See how considerate I can be? You’re welcome, fellas!”
You jolted, gulping at the budding sting. It was becoming a habit to seek for Zane’s approval after every turn, and fortunately you did—because unbeknownst to Taylor, Zane was staring him down, a furious and annoyed look on his face that quickly simmered when he caught your gaze.
“Spin, please.”
The next stop was Tom—Eager Tom. He’d been making comments on your body since he stepped foot inside the apartment, so it was expected that his turn would be based on personal whims. Although, you reckoned that the plug inside of you turned the tides.
Making you kneel on all fours, Tom slowly twisted the plug in and out of you while the group gathered from behind and intimately watched. You clenched at the base, stifling your groans into the back of your hand upon the group’s growing fascination with the sight of your swelling pucker.
“Fuck, look at that pretty rim…” Oliver mumbled, and Tom took it as a hint to trace the border of your hole with his finger, lone yet devious.
“If it looks that appetizing, imagine how it tastes,” Drew covertly suggested.
Tom hummed in thought while toying thoughtlessly with your hole—into your hole. “Not much of an ass-eater, maybe I should hand that task off to someone more capable… What do you think, (M/N)?”
“P-please… anyone is fine—”
As the tip neared its exit, you desperately held onto the last bit of latex that kept you from baring it all—thighs vibrating from the difficulty, toes curling as Tom screwed—but your muscles were as weak as Tom’s patience, and you naturally gave into his tortuous wrenching, clamming up him when he suddenly plunged the plug back into you, then completely bloomed—when Tom finished you off with a tyrannical yank.
“O-oh, god!” You yelped loud as you bared yourself for the group. Deep waves of heat trampled over your body and swam into every course of vein as one person after the other, from Tom to Drew to Nico to Oliver to Taylor to Zane, moaned in chorus at the sight of your budding insides.
Your chest laid flat on the floor, your glasses tossed and forgotten, your hips and ass raised high, your cock throbbed towards the floor—you suddenly buckled your hips when you felt a wad of spit launched directly at your blinking hole.
Then another, and another, and then three consecutive more, until your hole felt completely, and utterly drenched—one from every man you presumed as you laid there, writhing and dripping.
“Fuck, so pretty when it’s glistening like that,” Tom groaned. You could hear fabrics moving, see clothes coming off when you peeked from your position, and your cock throbbed at the smallest glimpse of Tom’s naked body, followed by Oliver’s, and then so on.
“Time,” Zane said again, then a second later rescinded his announcement, rubbing an affectionate hand over your back for you to look up. “Actually, fuck this—baby, you’re okay with us starting now? I don’t think we can handle it anymore… yeah?”
“Y-yeah, no—I can’t wait any longer—oh!” Suddenly, you felt something wet breach your hole. Unrelenting in its expedition as it flicked and wiggled the group’s load of spit inside of you, sliming you up from inside and out.
“Sorry, (M/N). Drew hasn’t had dinner yet—come on, up and at ‘em,” Oliver steered you back on all fours with a rough pull to your shoulders, and knelt himself before you. He pushed your hair back once, admiring the sweat beading over your hairline, the increasingly dismayed look on your face when someone—Taylor—spread and smacked your ass apart for Drew to lick and devour inside you completely. “And neither have you. Open.” You couldn’t even hesitate as Oliver worked at lighting pace. He hooked his thumb into your mouth, pulled it open, spat a thick load of spit where your tongue deftly caught it, and pushed his thick cock into your mouth—all in one neck-braking motion.
“Fuck…” Oliver moaned at the warmth of your mouth. His eyes rolled, but the sight of your lips wrapped around his veiny dick was holier than the overhead lights spotlighting you from above, so he did his best to maintain his composure, working your mouth open with the girth of his cock—slow and steady.
At least Oliver was generous enough to not shove himself down the back of your throat, but still—your throat spasmed nonetheless when he shoved himself deeper with a tug to your nape. Upon the hit to your throat, you abruptly pushed him out with your tongue and a gag, launching into a coughing fit.
“Loosen up on him, will you? He bruises easily,” Zane muttered, noticing Oliver’s fingers turning eggshell-white upon taking your name in his hand. Although, that didn’t stop Zane’s hand from fisting his cock. If anything, it pulsed merrily at the sound of your throat resisting.
“He’ll use his safe words, right? You’re fine? Tell me if you need a break,” As much as Oliver was large and imposing, his body a thick and study mass akin to Zane’s, his eyes were made of sugar. An uncanny color for those soluble carbohydrates, but it was fitting, considering your body melted from the way he looked fondly at you and petted at your cheek. “Pretty.”
“I-I’m fine…” You said with a bated breath and nodded to Oliver with assurance. Then again, when Zane’s hand pushed your hair back and remained on the crown of your head. “I’m fine. Promise.”
“I know. I trust you.” He bent down to soothe the swell of your lips with a lingering kiss before delivering a smack to your ass and pulling away with a renewed disposition. “Suck his cock like how you suck mine. Properly, this time.”
“Fuck—“ Your body propelled forward from the never-ending feast on your puckering hole. Out of curiosity, you peered over your shoulder and instantly found yourself regretting it. It was unavoidable. Your cock leaking in agony, watching Nico, Taylor, and Drew take turns at licking stripes over your hole. Hungry animals.
On Drew’s turn, he caught your gaze in midst of his licks and came to a sudden halt. He then widened his tongue over your crack and with a leaden pace, laved his tongue over your crease like he was cleaning the last bit of crumbs off his plate, smug and teasing in his scheme to make you break.
“No more distractions, yeah? That’s not the way you treat your boyfriend’s friends.” A grappling hook to your nape tore your eyes back to your front, and your mouth was instantly filled again with the heavy weight of Oliver’s musky cock. Your hands were braced on the floor, clutching at nothing but the installed security of wood panels, as Oliver rocked into your mouth. Your cheeks hallowed progressively, adapting to the stretch of your mouth when he tested the depth of your throat numerous times before finally committing and sinking his cock into the back of your mouth, into your throat, with one gratified push.
“Good boy. Hold it, hold it, don’t move. Just relax…” Zane heartened by your right side, reaching in between your legs and fondling with your cock as he’d been doing with his own. Upon the welling of tears, you clamped your eyes shut for comfort, and nearly choked back on your own spit, impulsively squeezing around Oliver’s cock.
“Oh, shit… holy fuck, guys.” Tom was marveling at your left. You peeked your eyes open and caught a glimpse of his hand spit-shining his long, veiny cock, twisting deliciously eager over his plump glans near your temple, the sticky sound of his spit loud and clear in your ear. “Jesus, Zane wasn’t lying when he said you could take dick like no other.”
Oliver’s balls were pressed flush to your chin, your mouth was stuffed into the unshaven hairs of his pubic area, your nostrils was flared from arousal at the salty scent of the dried sweat within vicinity, and your throat was plugged with a glorious amount of thick and heavy cock.
“There we go, that’s it. Good,” Oliver moaned, tenderly massaging your nape while cutting off the supply of oxygen at the same time. “You’re a good boy, aren’t you? Doing everything we want, huh?”
“Mmfgh!” Your moans muffled in the cramming of his swollen cock as Oliver began patting and squeezing your cheeks, tightening the suction of your mouth by curling his body overhead, and simply pushing deeper.
Swelling harder, throbbing, the longer you endured. You’d learned how to breathe through your nose when it came down to this, but you still had difficulties relaxing your tongue. It wasn’t surprising when ample amounts of saliva began leaking out of your mouth. More spilled out when Oliver pulled you back a centimeter, only for the course of action to halt with another plunge of his cock, somehow sinking deeper down your throat.
“Think he can fit another one?” Nico halfheartedly joked, the last one to crawl over and join the group in their sight-seeing. His cock was hard, veins bulging in a way that made you delirious because Oliver alone was enough to make you overwhelmed in the best way possible.
You couldn’t possibly imagine another cock lodged in.
“Don’t knock it until you’ve tried it, right, babe?” Zane tugged on your cock harder. He pulled at your balls, thumbed the piss-slit, and stroked your shaft with the pre-cum that had been dripping in solitude. “So wet, you’re so fucking wet from being used like this.”
Finally, you were graced with the precious taste of air. Oliver slowly pulled his dick from the depth of your throat, and the group moaned at the sight of your throat simultaneously deflating from its bulge.
Your throat was sore, but it was worth it. Moving your eyes from one man to another, it was finally registering what a dream this was. All of them were exceptionally fit with sweat proudly highlighting their training. All of them sported deliciously thick erections with multiple sights of pre-cum dripping like molasses to taunt you. What was more important was that all of their eyes were on you—something as minuscular as a blink would set them off, and they’d restart the non-existent staring battle between you and the group again.
They were as breathless as you were, and your heart was pumping with the sickening volume of their cocks being cordially stroked, their pecs and biceps brawny and bouncing from the exhilaration you’d been supplying them.
It was fucking worth it.
Under Zane’s conducting, the team flipped you onto your back, cushioning your body with multiple throw pillows, and surrounded themselves around you again, where you could properly watch them pleasure their cocks with the lube Zane had distributed as they kneeled over you. Then, Taylor made the decision for himself to slot his body beneath you, embracing you from behind and using his arms around you to hold your legs and hips back, positioning his freshly lubed cock near your hole.
“You smell good,” Taylor commented at the scent of your cologne, kissing madly into your neck as he found the source. You gulped, feeling him staring again through those eyelashes of his. With one hand, he turned your cheek to face him, his lips nearing and over yours, but never meeting. Lingering, breathing, gazing, indulging—you both surveyed each other’s features. Watching your soft but swollen lips, watching his sharp but pleading eyes. He pushed himself in without as much of a warning—and then watched the enlightened expression on his face, the immense rapturing of yours. For a moment, you swore you could’ve seen something other than lust in Taylor’s eyes, but he punctuated the delusions straight out of you with an unbearable thrust, and you never looked back. You gasped at the girth of his cock stretching you out, and his breath hitched at the spontaneous clenching your tight hole was bestowing him. “Fuck…”
You breathed out a whimper, and your parted mouth was immediately seized with the taste of Tom’s thick cock as he kneeled over your body and thrusted himself selfishly down your throat. Deeper, when Tom found your gags to be indecently enticing and feeding into his cock veins.
To make everything all the more dizzying, your hands were taken and wrapped around a pair of throbbing cocks; Zane and Nico’s in your left, Drew and Oliver in your right. Every contact point on your body, from Taylor’s dick pressing deep inside of you, to Tom’s succulent cock bulging your cheek, to Zane, Nico, Oliver, and Drew rubbing against their respective partner and fucking into your closed fist, burned.
“You love being full of cock, don’t you? Look at you… pleasuring the six of us at once. Come on, use your mouth. Suck Tom off, you can do it,” Taylor mouthed at your shoulder, the warmth of his breath tickling you, and then a complimentary bite to your shoulder—making your pulse run high. His grasp on the back of your raised thighs was warring as he used his core to beat his thick cock inside of you and pummel you open.
You cried around Tom’s cock, Taylor’s balls slapping your taint with every exhilarating thrust and feeding into your indulgence. Tom was noble. You already had enough on your plate; stroking two thick cocks per hand and enduring Taylor’s aggressive fucks. The intricate position you were in made it more difficult for you to suck him off, so Tom took matters into his own hands, and used your mouth as he pleased. His hands were behind his head as if they could stabilize the swimming lewd thoughts. You peeked at the utter state of bliss he was in, and your cock throbbed at the sight of his body. His chest full, his pits trimmed, his built expertly trimmed with fine and intricate muscles, especially so whenever he sunk in his stomach and flexed from the heat of your throat. You were salivating not only because the taste of Tom’s cock was so delightfully salty, but also because you were surrounded by such gorgeous men—a heaven of greek gods.
You felt reborn.
The kiss is all-consuming when Tom pulled himself out to press his lips against yours, making you sit up on Taylor’s lap. When his tongue pried your mouth open effortlessly, electricity shot down your spine, only for it to sear back up with the vicious pounding Taylor was giving you. “You taste like my dick, you like that?” Tom inhaled every ounce of breath you dispelled into his mouth. Broken sounds of whimpers and moans, a confusing yet compatible elixir that Tom drank up, and poured it back down your throat when he licked deeper into your mouth. He licked and nipped at your lips, tangled your tongue with his, and stole your breath with the eagerness of his mouth on yours that hadn’t seem to be faltering.
Heat flushed through your veins when each person took a turn to your mouth. The straddling position allowed the group to enclose themselves around you, the air thickening and weighing heavier than the swing of their cocks. Five heavy dicks surrounded your face while Taylor’s continued to swell beneath you, turning you inside and out as his hands on your hips hardened. It was an insoluble dilemma of your sexual appetite. You were starving for something to fill your mouth, but who—was the dilemma you were faced with.
“So big, fuck—“ You caught yourself drooling at the sight of their cocks dripping for you.
You behaved like a wanton, catching Oliver’s pre-cum with your tongue before sucking hard on Zane’s cock, then simultaneously stroking Drew and Nico over your shoulders ardently. The smell of Tom’s and Oliver’s salty cocks rubbing over your face made you vigilant and heightened your arousal to a crescendo. Eagerly, you replaced Zane’s cock with the two men, and moaned when the uncomfortable stretch they had provided made you stiffen around Taylor’s shaft.
“Shit, I’m going to—“ Taylor warned, his large hand splayed on your sweaty lower back while he wallowed in the confines of your walls, squeezing and clamping around his bristling cock.
Your mouth was stretched, saliva dripping from either corners of your lips, the crown of their dicks thick enough to shut your trap without so much as touching your throat. The wonderful sounds of their moans made the strain on your jaw well-worth the ache you were surely going to feel the effects from tomorrow onwards.
“Taking two cocks at once—never seen that before, Christ…” There was a vacant space in the middle of your mouth. Tilting your chin up, Oliver pushed a wad of spit into the opening—smug as he watched it fall into the void, somewhere in the back of your throat.
“He’s a horny little thing, isn’t he?” Tom followed in Oliver’s steps, spitting inside of your mouth. Two people were enough to set off a chain reaction as the rest of the group quickly joined. Nico, Drew, and Zane added their own shipment to the pooling spit haul, and they all watched in awe when you relaxed your tongue and let it drain into the back of your throat as one load.
The dehumanizing exploitation of your body turned sweat into goosebumps, and you were eager to be covered in welts by the time you were done.
Your entire body lit up at the attention the men were giving you. Taylor fucked you harder, his hands bruising on your body. Nico and Drew occupied the sloppy void that was your mouth when Tom pulled out to join Zane in kissing your flushed neck, and Oliver tended to your abandoned cock with his hand, stroking and twisting your knob. You choked on the two cocks as they attempted to fuck your mouth. It was a constant collision on your tongue and cheeks, where loads of spit pooled and dripped for a messy bustle, and you wouldn’t let them out of your mouth until Taylor delivered one strong thrust, and emptied himself inside of you. The sudden launch of his cum erupting inside made you pull away with a bated breath and moan, your body writhing as he flooded your insides.
“Fuck!” He shouted from behind you, clawing into your inner thighs while your ass was pumped with the warmth of his thick cum. Warm spurts continued to paint you from the inside as Taylor resumed his hips for a few more seconds, dumping every seed that he could push out deep inside of your violated hole, until his sack was emptied.
“Don’t let it leak out,” Drew hoisted you off of Taylor’s limp and recovering body, and pushed you back onto all fours, your head in between Taylor’s legs. “—and clean him up. Not a drop wasted, got it?”
“M-mm, yeah—fuck!” When you began licking at the underside of Taylor’s softening cock, your hole was back to being occupied again with the hung curve that was Drew’s dick. He didn’t waste a single second in making you squirm. With both hands tucked into your pelvis, Drew used your body as leverage while fucking madly into you.
“Fuck—look at you, you’re creaming all over my dick,” the sounds were delectable. Soft and creamy with every thrust Drew delivered to your ass—you felt some cum splatter onto your back from how hard he was fucking into you. As much as your asscheeks stung from the way his thighs clapped against your flesh, you were relishing every second of it with Taylor’s cock in your mouth, languidly swiveling your tongue and lapping up remnants of his seed until he was pristine.
The rough spanking marked you as Drew’s in the moment. You felt guilty for thinking it, but it was placed in good faith. HIs palm seared your stinging ass, reminding you to tend to the others. You do, your vision blurry and hazy, but you took whatever cock wanted to enter your mouth. Tom’s, Oliver’s, Nico’s, then Zane’s—they all tasted incredible and if you were allowed to, you could see yourself coming right then and there—simply from sucking cock—cocks.
You thrived in rough hands. Drew’s, Zane’s—anyone’s. Your skin throbbed when Zane and Nico slapped your cheeks with their cocks, and your asshole spasmed when Drew sealed himself within you, pushing every drop of seed until he slumped over the curve of your back, toppling you onto the ground with his weight. Even then, he pushed into your squirms, his cock buried deep into your ass, refusing to pull himself away from the sickening pleasure.
“Up and at ‘em, (M/N). Not done yet,” Oliver smiled and pulled you onto your feet, positioning himself behind you.
“Fuck—Zane…” You called out to him, bracing yourself on the arm of his couch as your muscles were still stirring awake from their sleep.
He approached you, quick in his steps, immediately tending to your non-existent wounds. His fingers through your hair, his hand over your cheeks. “What—you’re okay? What do you need? Too much? Fuck—Drew, I told you to go easy on—”
“N-no, no! I’m okay—fuck, I—I love this… so much… So much cum inside of me, god—” You were in a dreamlike state, drunk on the lights overhead you were mistaking for stars. Reality blurred even more when you felt Oliver take your wrists with one strong hold, holding them over your back, and pushed himself inside of you with one strong thrust. “Fuck!”
“Loosen up, dude. Your boy’s enjoying it—see? Taking our cocks like it’s a fucking olympic sport,” Oliver cruelly laughed, ignoring the twisting of Zane’s face as he focused on the absolute bliss on your face, holding you parallel to his body, to the sharp thrusts he catapulted upwards into your sloppy hole. “All the cocks that’s been inside of you, but you’re still so fucking tight. You going to loosen anytime soon? Hm? Too much of a slut to let that happen, right? I know you feel me in your guts, (M/N). You look fucking beautiful taking my dick so effortlessly.”
Drips of cum were leaking out of you. You could feel it trailing from your creamy hole, then down to the back of your slick tensed thighs as Oliver fucked you while standing.
Unlike Drew, Oliver didn’t need to brand you with hard spanks to your body. His hammering cock was enough, hollowing you with ease, the crown assaulting your sweet spot with ease—everything Oliver did was with ease, and it was further aided as you let yourself go limp. He fucked you bent over the arm of the couch, then when he had enough, you were back to being fucked standing. His arms looped around your pits, then interlocked behind your neck in support of his thrusts. His cock was ruthless in your ass, spearing and ruining your hole for anyone else to come after him. Your tender hole was brutally stretched around his swelling cock, your body burning up from the hold he was restraining your body with. Oliver whispered praises for your endurance, kisses you on the neck, then the shell of your ear for providing him a pleasure that would be the blueprint for the rest of his hook-ups. He straightened his knees, pushing himself balls deep into you, and in one long groan from his gut, spilled deep inside of you.
“Bet you feel so full, don’t you? Fuck…” Oliver grabbed his dick at the base and squeezed the remaining spurts inside of you before pulling out, flicking any remnants of cum over your bruised ass cheeks.
You moaned for him. The third load in your ass, and your heart was aching because you were another man closer to concluding the night.
It was open, dripping in cum, and then immediately seized when Nico pulled you onto his lap to join him on the couch. You felt like a rag doll—pulled, tossed, and thrown however one was pleased to treat you. As long as your hole was still functioning and remained at their disposal, neither of the men had any complaints about marking your body with a few scuffs.
Nico faced you to the group, your back planted against him. You whimpered when your tired limbs were hoisted once again as he hooked his arms under your knees, and then raised your legs up to position your dripping hole over his cock. Your hole had become a luscious swell of gape. The group marveled at the sight of your puffy rim, beautifully creamed by the pleasure of Taylor, Drew, and Oliver respectively.
“Holy shit, he’s fucking hollowed out…” Tom muttered, stroking himself to the sight of your insides blooming for everyone to see.
“Shit’s getting me horny again,” Taylor laughed, tugging on his flaccid cock, his body still recovering from the high he had inflicted upon himself moments prior.
Supporting your body with his arms, Nico raised your legs higher, bending them back until your knees hovered near your temples, and then locked his hand around your neck to hold you in place. Your mouth fell agape at the stretch of your muscles, and heat spread throughout your body as the group watched Nico’s cock breach your opening with a slow shove, pushing the leak of cum back inside of your guts.
Your hands trembled as you guarded your position on the couch upon Nico folding you back and feasting on your insides with his length. You felt Nico’s thighs tense, pushing up into you with all his might while your gaze locked with Zane’s. He gulped at the unholy sight of your hole being raptured—hungrily being excavated with Nico’s throbbing tool. Nico’s cock was covered in the recent load stuffed inside of you, an increasing sheen the more he fell into a rhythm, and rutted into you aimlessly, chasing after his fill. He slid in and out of you easily, the ample amount of cum replacing any need for to renew his dick with lube.
You and Nico panted in union. His heavy cock stretched you open, and Nico apologized with a blistering kiss to your shoulder, as if fucking you couldn’t be the apology itself. When you alternated your gaze to Tom, he looked almost predatory. Eager like he had always been, but something internal was running thin—Tom’s patience. He scooted closer, watching you take Nico’s fat cock with scalding envy. While your hole took the screwing, Tom caressed the rim of your asshole. You were loose enough for what he wanted to do to you. Carefully, Tom pressed one finger against the underside of Nico’’s cock, and you choked back on your moans, throwing your head back at the sudden tightness as Tom slipped a finger inside of you. Nico continued rocking, occasionally slowing to accommodate Tom as he worked three fingers inside of you.
“T-Tom, that’s too much—“
“But it feels good though, right? You seem to like it when it’s too much.”
Spitting on his own cock, Tom massaged the layer of lube in before lining himself with your occupied opening. Your eyes widened in stupefied anticipation—in arousing fear—yet you brought your hands over to spread your ass cheeks for him, for Tom to force his cock into your body alongside Nico’s length, and you cried with the double breach.
“M-mmfgh! Fuck…!” You cried out, your eyes rolled in the sockets, leaving only the whites of your eyeballs visible as Nico and Peter began moving in opposite rhythms.
“Fuck, Tom—your dick feels so good against mine, holy crap—“
With an animalistic groan, you pushed your ass out, greedily taking the two cocks into your gut despite the uncomfortable stretch signaling for you to stop and rethink about this decision unfolding before your very eyes.
Not long after, Nico and Tom pumped their hips in harmony, filling you over and over. Cum would trickle out from Tom joining, but he was quick to pull himself back out and scoop it back inside of you with a deep plunge that made the three of you reduce yourselves to nothing but guttural moans. You felt Nico’s body tense beneath you, coercing your own to tighten at the core.
Holding your thighs, Tom pushed into you to the hilt while Nico followed suit. They shuddered with ecstasy, growling like wild beasts from the natural impulse to clamp your sloppy hole around them. Their cocks were rubbing against one another, harder, faster, as they fucked themselves inside of you, opening you more than you had thought was imaginable at a relentless pace. You mewled, collapsing back onto Nico’s hold as your body rocked from the powerful thrusts as if you were caught in a tide.
You felt your own cock throb at this, balls tightening and stroking your cock to the sound of Nico in your ear and Tom at your lips, panting into your mouth in between messy kisses. You were wrecked, completely and utterly ruined as they rocked their shafts into you in opposite strides now. One would hit your sweet spot while the other pulled himself out to renew that fresh stretch of your rim again as they pushed with conviction. Between labored breaths, you searched for Zane over Tom’s shoulder, your heart beating faster and faster as he seemed to be mesmerized by the display of your sheer dedication in following in on your promise to make him feel like the luckiest man on Earth.
Faster. Harder. Deeper. In a matter of seconds, you all came together. Your body spasmed and writhed between their own twitching, your hole clenched around the erupting cocks, your own dick throbbed and spurted out creamy ropes onto your body. Their hips were unrelenting, frothing the thick cum sent deep into your crevices with writhing and swollen flesh, and you slumped, Nico’s released hold relieving your muscles as your body shifted back and forth from the two cocks milking themselves until their shafts softened.
At the thought of Zane—the last man that you would be taking—your position came to you unbidden. Scrolled over the arm of the couch again, you felt comforted by the ample leg room, stretching your muscles for the final act while Zane prepared himself behind you, laving his cock over your crevice, submerging himself in the wetness that your raw hole was dripping out. You were depraved of touch—Zane’s touch—you barely spent a minute with him in between stationing yourself with every men. All except him.
“They did a real number on you…” Zane muttered in your ear. His left hand caressed the tense muscles in your back before joining his right in steering you by the shoulders, his grip clutching a bruising shade into your skin. “Suddenly I don’t matter anymore, hm? You only call me over to show yourself off—showing off that dripping hole of yours.” Unsolicited moans drew out of you with the push of Zane’s hips, fitting his cum-covered cock over your crevice, as a way to soothe the swelling of your puffy rim, but also to ridicule your newfound addiction. “Showing off what was mine—that has now been ruined by five other fucking men. Fuck, I saw the way you were looking at them. All of them. You reek of them too, fucking slut.” He deliberately pressed his swollen cockhead to your ring of muscle, swirling and tracing the circumference, only to move back a centimeter and slide himself right by, pressing his shaft against you instead.
You whimpered, circling your hips back for more of Zane, to apologize to him with the warmth of your hole, to make up for your lack of attention towards him by letting him milk himself inside of you—like you’d done for the others. “I-I’m sorry—Zane, please—“ Your breath hitched when Zane wrapped a hand around your throat and pulled you against his imposing chest, arching you forward.
“So, you want my cock now? Five dicks weren’t enough? You need mine to feel satisfied? Face the group. Tell them how much you love my cock,” squeezing your cheek, he forced your head to turn to his friends. They stirred in their seats, their hands back to fisting their erections again.
“I-I love Zane’s cock… I love the way he fucks me—no—the way he makes love to my hole, the way he fills me up to the brim with his thick cum, the way he milks himself and breeds me. I love that he takes his time with me, s-shows me that I’m more than just a doll for fucking,” With the way you were looking; panting from the amount of dick you had taken for the past hour, sweating from the thickened sex in the air, dripping from the loads that marked their battle claim on you; you evoked a fever that spread from one end of the circle to the other. One by one, they gathered closer, inhaling the scent of your arousal—their sex, their seed deeply embedded into your body like you had no other choice but to use them as cologne.
“I-I love that he fucks me—like he loves me,” you peeked over your shoulder to look back at him with groveling gratitude. Was it a mistake to admit this for the first time? In this moment? Where it was confessed to the public, rather than solely to Zane? Your heart raced, and Zane was well-aware as he pacified you with doting affection on your chest, roaming his free hand over the plane, tweezing your perky nipples while his other hand at your throat maintained. You brought a hand up to hold his nape, to hold you close to you because—you’d been separated from your boyfriend for far too long. You were malfunctioning, throwing yourself to every man who wanted to please you and that swollen hole of yours, and you needed Zane to ground you back to him.
And ground you he did—Zane humbled you in the process, evidently satisfied with your short monologue as the kiss he honored you with was deep and enthralling. He poured all sorts of emotion in your mouth, explored it with his tongue in midst of tucking his feelings inside of you, muttered incoherent words of affection while he was drunk on your breath feeding his lungs with life.
“I love you,” he tucked the confession into the shell of your ear and punctuated his returning feelings with one sharp charge of his thrust. The previous loads within you permeated—saturated deep into your flesh—as Zane congested your guts with his large cock, making you wail on his slow, but bellicose hips. “I. Love. You.” Zane repeated in your ear, following up with every one of his thrusts. His cock was methodical inside of you. Screwing what was loose, tightening your walls like his cock was a hammer to secure you around his girth. You felt yourself tip-toeing the floor, the thrusts catapulting your body from Zane’s strength, but there was not a second where you didn’t feel safe. His hold on you—driving into you with his cock, restricting your limbs while he showered you with the most heart-fluttering compliments—he was your sanctuary, the holiest of all places, and you felt revived.
He had his hand over your throat, vaulting your moans with a clamp, pushing you back onto your heel, but as soon as he came up again and delivered those rapturing thrusts, you returned to your natural stance on your tip-toes. You struggled to make sounds—loud mewls and whimpers that proved how absolutely fulfilling you felt in the moment. Your throat was sore and dry, and your body was exhausted and could only endure Zane for so long. You fell limp in Zane’s arms, tensing at the right moments where he penetrated your prostate. It was the unsolicited answer to your body malfunctioning.
The roll of your eyes, the spasming of your asshole, the gape of your mouth as silent moans thickened the air—you and Zane bonded as one. Your ass pushed back to meet his thrusts, creating an electrifying wave of thunderous sounds of sweaty and sticky skin clapping against each other. You felt your body ripple from Zane’s power, from his devotion to forge your hole to the shape of his cock, from his desperate need to tell you that he loved you with more than just his words. You felt every inch of him through your gut. Bent over the arm of the couch, your sweat dripped onto the leather while he fucked you against it, your skin chafing abrasively. Your knees constantly collided with the furniture, but you were too far gone, completely lost in a cycle of Zane’s affection that you didn’t realize your chin was being held up by Drew, jerking his cock over your face.
You blinked rapidly to ward off exhaustion and before you could comprehend the line forming behind him, your face was propelled with thick flying ropes of cum. Drew spilled all over you with a moan, aiming wherever, but mostly at the center. He shot at you hard, feeling himself splatter from your lips, then to your hair.
It happened rapidly, Zane’s hips seemingly quickening to sync with the group’s thunder-paced wrists. Taylor was the next person in line, pumping his hairy cock to the sight of Drew’s cum dripping off of your nose from the vigor force Zane was pummeling you from behind. With a deep grunt and a push of his hips, Taylor emptied his heavy sack, adding onto the layers of cum on your face.
You’ve seen it in the videos you’d watched. It was no good letting their hard-work go to waste. You tipped your head back and Tom helped, resting his hand at your hairline while he stroked his cock over the stains on your face. Again, he was another man to blow another thick load onto your face. Before he left, he made sure to wipe himself clean on your neck, embellishing you with his gratitude.
Then came Nico; the massive amount of loads on your face pooled as you patiently waited for his second high. Your vision was screwed, trying to peer through the cum dripping down your eyelids, but eventually you had to settle on shutting your eyes and anticipate blindly. Within seconds, you heard Nico grunt and moan, followed by another spillage onto your face. He aimed directly at your mouth, where you missed the first unforeseen shot, but quickly adapted and opened your mouth to hold his seed. The salty taste on your tongue bloomed, and whoever’s cum was trailing from the bridge of your nose, past your philtrum and into your open mouth was even saltier, making you writhe as the shudders were uncontrollable when you swallowed.
Finally, Oliver stepped up and amused himself to the heavy decoration weighing down on your face. Stroking his cock, he also played with the cum, dipping the crown of his cock into someone else’s load, scooping a white thread was dangling off your jaw and into your mouth, wiping your eyelids clean with his glans—because he wanted you to see this. He wanted you to watch him come on you with immense pride, to watch him pump the study veins in his thick cock as he indulged at the sight of your pretty eyes surrounded by the four prior men’s fulfillment. With gritted teeth, Oliver groaned from the depth of his gut and released his seed all over you. The group saved the largest load for last. Your eyes immediately clenched following one thick splatter to your lid, then the other, blurring your vision and stinging your eyes once again as Oliver targeted painting you from all corners of the face, including the ones he had helped wipe clean. He squeeze the last remaining seed, and flicked it onto your lips, groaning from the sudden sensitivity in his cock.
“Shit… you look so—” Zane groaned from behind you. He couldn’t stop marveling at it; the unholy sight of your face snowed under an ample amount of cum. The scent of the group’s sex drifted in the almost still air, and Zane ached inside of you.
You can feel the warmth emanating from his study body when he pushed his weight onto you, fucking into you harder and igniting the burn in your thighs. Peeking from one eye, your head was turned to where Zane claimed his rightful place on your lips again. His eyes flashed with hunger at the taste of someone’s cum dripping into your mouth, so he kissed harder, molding your hole to his cock and hammering into you at a breath-taking pace. There were multiple passageways the various pool of mixed semen were taking on your face. A web dangled off your cheek, a trail dripped in pursuit of the kiss, a wet clump was smushed between Zane’s nose and yours; you and Zane were a sloppy mess, and you both were baptized by the scent, the taste, and the feeling of it all.
You were gorgeous, your delicate state only adding to your appeal. One more look at you, and Zane grunted low. He reached between your thighs with his hands, so hard it hurt, and he was wild and strong, fucking into you madly while knocking your breath into a state of stasis. His hips smacked against your ass, faster and faster, and your body was up in flames. Every thrust felt punishing, like he wanted to condemn you for seducing him—for loving him—but if this was punishment, you needed to find more ways to anger him, to love him.
You whimpered into his growls, his firm hands pulled you impossibly closer by the thighs, clutching and fucking you back onto his cock, as he raptured himself into you. He stroked the inside of your mouth, his tongue feeling fat and warm, savoring the taste of salty seed on your tongue, and he groaned into you once more. He grunted and growled like an animal, powered by the group watching in awe, the ravenous noise reverberating through your guts, and you feel the eruption of cum dousing your flesh, deep in your guts, his large cock pulsating in you.
The pleasure hit you like a lightning bolt. Your thighs shook, your hole spasmed, and you rut against his swelling cock, pleasured and soothed by the warmth and thickness of his steaming cum. His release had him quivering against your back, his face tucked inside the crook of your neck while he rocked slowly, breeding you.
“So good, you’re so fucking good…” Zane muttered weakly, panting and mouthing against the back of your ear.
“So full—“ you groaned at the heavy weight of dick in you, then hissed when Zane bucked his hips once more, kissing the crown of his cock to the mouth of your prostate, as if it was a reminder for you that he owned you.
Obscene noises came from his cock plunging your ass with cum—more cum, as you struggled to contain another load, and felt it drip down to your ankles. You sighed, taking it all in—taking Zane in—and slumped over the arm of the couch, heaving a euphoric sigh of relief, relishing in the high-yielding pleasure that was Zane’s cock, dazzling by the lights above you—the stars.
“You guys okay?” laughing at the group’s sudden exhaustion, Zane refused to pull away from you. His hands curled around your hips, then carefully maneuvered himself to lie on the couch with him, still buried to the root of your hole.
“Better than a smoke,” Drew yawned, rubbing his large hand over your ankle by virtue of exceeding his expectations. Nico petted at your head, the spent look on your face charming when you turned towards him and weakly smiled. Tom and Oliver were quiet, still recovering from their orgasm. When you caught their gaze, they held up their thumb once before plummeting back onto the floor.
“Fuck, man—you were great,” Taylor slumped against the foot of the couch, limbs sprawled from the exhaust of muscles, but he joined in on the caressing of your leg, squeezing at your calf, nearly rendering you to sleep.
One by one, the group fell to a silence, a gentle slumber despite the hardwood floors forewarning a few of them of a back ache the next morning. You watched peacefully, the caressing of your body slowly coming to a halt, and then looked back at Zane, collapsed onto your back, drifting into sleep with the gentle snores near your ear.
Hopefully by morning—Zane would tell you that you fulfilled on your promise.
He was the luckiest man alive.
nouearth. please do not repost, plagiarize, or translate my works. and if you like this story, please reblog and leave a like!
#zane phillips x male reader#tom holland x male reader#drew starkey x male reader#oliver stark x male reader#nico greetham x male reader#taylor zakhar perez x male reader#zane phillips x reader#tom holland x reader#drew starkey x reader#nico greetham x reader#oliver stark x reader#taylor zakhar perez x reader#nou.fics
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The Perfect Formula

BARTENDER SPENCER
word count: 1265
warnings: drunk reader
The BAU’s bullpen had been transformed for the night, a rare occasion where work was on pause, and celebration took center stage. Strings of lights sparkled around the desks, and a large Bluetooth speaker on Derek’s desk blasted Garcia’s eclectic mix of holiday classics and ‘80s pop. The mood was relaxed, the team scattered around the room with glasses in hand, laughing and unwinding. A makeshift bar had been set up on the break room counter, cluttered with liquor bottles, mixers, and fresh fruit.
You leaned against the counter, watching as Spencer Reid stood at the center of it all, sleeves rolled up to his elbows, meticulously measuring liquids into a shaker. His tongue poked out slightly as he concentrated, and his cheeks were flushed a light pink, either from the heat of the room or the attention he was drawing from the team.
He’d taken charge of the cocktails after Morgan joked that Reid’s genius might finally be put to use for something other than criminal profiling. What had started as a tease quickly turned into a spectacle, as Spencer muttered to himself about ratios, volumes, and chemical balances while precisely measuring ingredients.
“Spence, you could just eyeball it, most people just pour and pray,” you teased, resting your chin on your hand as you watched. “It’s a party, not a chemistry experiment.”
His eyes flicked to yours, wide and flustered. “Eyeballing it would risk an imbalance in flavor profile, which could ruin the entire drink. It introduces too many variables. Cocktails, especially something as classic as a Daiquiri, require precision. The ideal ratio is two parts rum, one part lime juice, and one part syrup. Deviate from that, and you throw the balance off entirely.”
“Sounds pretty straightforward,” you said with a shrug, obviously joking, but of course he didn’t understand that.
“It’s deceptively simple,” he countered. “The ratio is easy to remember, but the variables compound quickly. For example, the dilution from the ice adds approximately twenty percent water to the final mixture, so you have to account for that when calculating the initial ingredient volumes. And then there's the acid-to-sugar ratio in the lime juice and syrup, which needs to fall between 1.2:1 and 1.6:1 for optimal flavor.”
You stared at him, blinking. “Did you just…math a cocktail?”
Spencer smiled faintly as he reached for a lime. “Of course. Math is the foundation of mixology.”
He began squeezing the lime, pausing briefly to weigh the juice on a small scale he’d brought over from the lab. “The average lime produces about 30 milliliters of juice, but that can vary depending on the ripeness and size. Too much acidity and the drink becomes harsh. Too little, and it tastes flat. This lime gave me 28 milliliters, so I'll adjust the syrup accordingly to maintain balance… for the record, this isn’t just a cocktail. It’s a daiquiri. The original recipe was created by Jennings Cox in the last 1800’s, and its simplicity makes it particularly vulnerable to imprecision.”
You couldn’t suppress a laugh. “You really are a genius, you know that?”
Spencer glanced at you, his face flushing deeper. “I’m just applying basic principles of chemistry and physics,” he said, his tone modest but his expression pleased.
“You’re applying science to make a party drink,” you teased.
“And doing it perfectly,” he replied, with a rare bit of sass, pouring the lime juice into the shaker.
You watched as he added the rum with his standard precision, using a jigger to measure out 60 milliliters before pouring it in. Then came the syrup, which he poured slowly, his eyes narrowing as he calculated the exact amount to offset the slight deficit in lime juice. Finally, he added ice, giving the shaker a firm tap before picking it up and shaking with a smooth, practiced rhythm.
The clink of ice against metal filled the room as his arms moved fluidly, the muscles in his forearms flexing, exposed from where he’d rolled up the sleeves of his shirt. You tilted your head a little, unable to look away as he focused entirely on his task.
“Spencer-” you started, your tone teasing.
“Not yet,” he interrupted, holding up a finger without breaking his rhythm. “If I stop shaking too soon the drink won’t chill properly, and the dilution will be uneven.”
You smirked, waiting until he finally strained the drink into a glass. He slid it across the counter to you, looking up with a mix of anticipation and nervousness.
“Here,” he said, his voice soft. “Let me know what you think.”
You took a sip, letting the tartness of the lime and the smoothness of the rum wash over your palate. It was perfect- bright, balanced, and refreshing.
“Spence, this is amazing,” you said, meeting his gaze.
His lips quirked up into a small, bashful smile. “Really?”
“Really,” you confirmed, raising the glass in a mock toast. “To Spencer Reid, cocktail extraordinaire.”
He chuckled softly, his blush deepening and he turned to prepare another drink.
--------------------------------------------
Hours later, the party was in full swing, but you found yourself repeatedly drawn back to Spencer’s bar. Each time he made you something different- a Margarita, a Negroni, an espresso martini- explaining the history and chemistry behind each one as he worked. You found it endearing, and hot, even as your head began to feel pleasantly fuzzy from the alcohol.
“Another, please,” you smiled, sliding your empty glass across the counter.
Spencer raised an eyebrow, his hands hesitating over the bottles. “That’s your fourth drink,” he said cautiously.
“And every single one has been delicious,” you replied, leaning on the countertop.
“Maybe you should slow down,” he suggested, his tone gentle but firm.
“Come on, Spencer,” you sighed, pouting dramatically. “You’re the barkeep here. Don’t leave me hanging.”
He sighed, relenting as he began preparing another cocktail. “You know, alcohol inhibits your prefrontal cortex, which is responsible for decision-making and impulse control.”
“Yeah, yeah, science boy,” you said, waving him off. “Just make the drink.”
By the time you finished that one, the world felt slightly tilted, and your laugh had become louder, less contained. You stumbled against the counter, giggling as Spencer reached out instinctively to steady you.
“Okay,” he said firmly, taking your glass from your hand. “That’s it. You’re done.”
“What?” you protested, looking up at him with puppy dog eyes. “No way, I’m fine!”
“You’re drunk,” he replied, his voice soft but unwavering.
“I am not drunk.”
“You just called me a wizard and asked if we could open a bar together,” he pointed out. “No more drinks for you. You need water.”
“But Spence,” you whined, swaying slightly.
“Water,” he repeated adamantly, guiding you to a nearby chair and handing you a glass of water. “Drink this. You’ll thank me in the morning.”
You took the glass with a dramatic sigh, slumping into the chair. “You’re no fun.”
He crouched down in front of you, his elbows resting on his thighs, his eyes warm and concerned. “I’d rather be no fun than let you drink yourself into a black-out.”
“Fine,” you grumbled, sipping the water. After a moment, you added, “But you’re still cute when you’re bossy.”
Spencer froze, his eyes widening as his face turned a deep shade of red. “I-uh-”
“Relax, genius wizard,” you said with a lazy smile. “It’s a compliment.”
He stood quickly, muttering something about getting a snack. As he moved behind the counter again, you couldn’t help but grin. Even in your inebriated state, it was fun watching the famed Dr. Spencer Reid unravel.
#criminal minds#criminal minds fanfic#dr spencer reid#spencer reid#spencer reid criminal minds#spencer reid fanfiction#spencer reid fic#spencer reid one shot#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x you#spencer reid angst#reid#matthew gray gubler#bau#mgg#doctor spencer reid#derek morgan#penelope garcia#bau team#david rossi
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Merchant! Please, rant to us about the mythological inspirations of the BurningCheese!
The fact that I came home and sat down and wrote out a detailed post for this ask... The fact that I did research into Hindu mythology for BurningCheese inspo in the first place... (sidenote: Hinduism is legitimately interesting, I had genuine fun learning about it even outside of cringe shipping bs)
THE FACT THAT THERE'S ACTUAL SHIT TO WORK WITH...
Buckle up, buckaroos lol (I'll put it under a cut in case it turns out really long)
Do note that I am not a religious scholar nor a follower of Hinduism, and I didn't do a suuuuuuuper deep dive. I spent a few hours reading different articles/sources and looking at some paintings and the like. Whatever I say is what I derived from my own personal understanding (and my old notes), which may well be flawed!
Let's start with the obvious.
Burning Spice is directly inspired by Shiva, Hindu god of destruction. Important note: in the actual religion, Shiva is not malevolent; the destruction he brings is considered a necessary part of life and the foundation of cosmic balance. He can be temperamental and violent, yes, but he is by and large a pretty decent guy and performs his duty in the cycle of life and death without complaint (obviously, this is where Spice deviates lol)
His hair is a fucking pitch black jungle. Matted af. Just like Burning Spice's. I just felt like saying that lmao (they both look like shit, Shiva wears animal skins and dead people's ashes and doesn't brush his damn hair. HE WENT TO HIS OWN WEDDING LOOKING LIKE THAT! (Until Parvati told him to please freshen up and he went "yes dear, anything for you <3" and manifested fancy groom attire))
Now let's poke our heads into the rabbit hole.
Parvati is Shiva's wife, whom he adores and is wholly devoted to (and vice versa).
She is revered as a life-giver. A goddess of creation, love, devotion, and... ABUNDANCE.
Parvati has many forms. Her original form is that of a beautiful woman wearing a red sari, with a GOLDEN HEADDRESS/HEADBAND and LOTS OF GOLD JEWELRY AND PRECIOUS STONES, WHICH SHE LOVES.
She's very beloved by pretty much everyone. She's elegant, vivacious, and revered as a doting wife and mother
I'm not finished.
One of Parvati's forms is that of a fierce warrior woman called Durga. She is powerful, confident, and no less beautiful than her original self
She has many arms, and a sacred weapon in each one. One of which is a GOLDEN SPEAR.
Durga is regarded as a goddess of protection, war and destruction - but not the malevolent sort. She fights and destroys the forces of evil, for the sake of others'; the destruction she brings is in the name of protecting and liberating innocents, and empowering creation
One of her epithets is Mahamoha, which means "great delusion" - and in this context, the delusion/ignorance derives from intense desire and attachment
Now, with all of that said, I'm gonna tell you guys a story.
Shiva's first wife was Sati, daughter of Daksha. Though they were madly in love, Daksha despised him and never approved of their relationship
The blood between them was so bad that Daksha declined to invite either of them to the yajna (VERY important ritual sacrifice) he was hosting. Against both social norms and Shiva's advice, Sati showed up anyway, which led to her father cruelly insulting her, her marriage and basically her whole fucking life in front of everybody
In protest of everyone's derision of her and the life she chose to live, she throws herself on the sacrificial fire and thus kills herself (extreme and unnecessary, I know lol). Shiva finds out and LOSES. HIS. SHIT. Shows up, goes on a rampage, hurts a bunch of people, beheads Daksha (whom he revives and pardons eventually)
In his grief, Shiva basically decides to retire from everything and seclude himself in the mountains, denouncing the world and everything in it and refusing to interact with anyone or anything
Sati ends up reincarnating as Parvati. She remembers exactly who she is/was, and made it her mission to return to Shiva's side and rekindle their relationship
Shiva doesn't buy that that's his beloved and rebuffs her. She doesn't give up. She tries over and over again to convince him and win his affection. She endures harsh weather without appropriate clothes, starvation, the faces of her own fears and doubts, endlessly; all while continuously performing acts of religious penance/piety. So unwavering is she in her strength and devotion that Shiva eventually, finally realizes that that really is the woman he loved and lost
They reunite and remarry quickly (and it was a big blowout event, too! Very important, there are even several sculptures depicting it!) and they live happily ever after
And a short summary of their union:
Shiva and Parvati are considered complementary forces; one without the other does not make sense and simply cannot be. Parvati is the warm, life-affirming, creative force that balances Shiva's cold, world-denying, destructive one. She's portrayed as having lured Shiva away from his lonely, ascetic lifestyle and showed him the value of life, love and marriage. They're almost always depicted together in artworks, as they're admired/adored not only for their loving partnership, but for the way they uphold cosmic order together. They are life and death. Attachment and detachment. ABUNDANCE AND DESTRUCTION.
It's commonly stated that Parvati is the outright source of Shiva's power. His shakti (not super sure how to explain what this is, it's not very simple. It's... ultimate cosmic energy, basically). She encourages and energizes him. Without her, he is incomplete
They have two kids :P two sons, Ganesha and Kartikeya. (I DID NOT KNOW THIS when I first made up the fankids, I just happened to guess the correct number of kids to give them lol. I thus decided to partially base Pepper Jack on Ganesha and Matar Paneer on Kartikeya, enjoy those links where I explain properly haha (and you can look through their tags to see more abt them if you want))
They also jointly represent harmony between sexes. Shiva is the male aspect, Parvati is the female
They also jointly symbolize love, devotion and sexuality and are said to have a lot of sex (and are also often depicted having sex)
Let me walk you guys through it all one more time. A god who, in his endless rage and grief, chose to forsake the world and all within it, for he believed he had nothing left to value from it...




Who is temperamental, violent, and is not above lashing out at others when he feels wronged... who can and will destroy everything in his path... (You don't need screenshot evidence of this but whatever lol)

Who will lash out at others if they dare to lay their hands on his counterpart, or otherwise keep him away from her...



... And his counterpart, a beautiful, vibrant, benevolent goddess who can take many different forms, including that of an elegant queen adorned with gold and gems, and a great, fearless warrior... (You notice how there's some red in her Soul Jam now? There's that bit of Destruction, used to defend others...)


Who's known and loved for the boundless love and warmth and charity she bestows upon one and all...


Who's known as a creator, a life-giver; who so cherishes the world and what she makes that she allows herself to descend into madness in pursuit of preserving it all... Whose desire and attachment led to ignorance and delusion...








Who, in stubborn defiance of the cruelties she faced, chose to remove herself from them and from the world itself for a time, only to eventually return with her identity and life's purpose still intact, and livelier than ever...




Who takes the form of a hero, a protector of the innocent, a warrior who battles against evil and seeks to vanquish oppression and tyranny...




And together, she and he make up the foundation of the world. The threads with which the great tapestry of the universe is woven. Life and death. Attachment and love for the world, and detachment from and contempt for it. A woman dressed in the finest garments and jewelry, and a man who embodies the unforgiving wilderness in which he sequesters himself.
Abundance and Destruction.

In conclusion: Burning Spice and Golden Cheese are literally Shiva and Parvati, they are husband and wife, they NEED each other and are meant to be together, together they create and maintain the balance of life and the universe, we must all band together and demand that Devsisters release the cutscene that shows their wedding, they are the bride and the ugly ass groom fr fr
#BURNINGCHEESE WAS FORETOLD IN THE SACRED TEXTS!!! I am not crazy I swear#also how do I look in this tinfoil hat? handsome? dashing? alluring?#does it accurately display my 300 IQ? does the sight of it compel you to buy me chocolate ice cream? Or Japanese Kit Kats?#i feel like such a lunatic for making this post lmao put me back in the padded cell I'm a fucking menace#cookie run kingdom#burning spice cookie#golden cheese cookie#burningcheese#goldenspice#burning spice crk#golden cheese crk
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I was sleeping and right before my alarm went off I dreamt of a scene where some hotshot demonic cultivator sends a message to Cang Qiong asking to spar and speak with the sects “resident expert on demonic cultivation” with the implication that it’s a peak lord and the peak lord meeting has them asking who tf that could be and tossing around various ideas while YQY and SQQ avoid each others gazes
(Unnamed shidi 1-adopted but raised with demonic ancestry; SQH-trades in demonic realm and has a secret demon lover he sneaks into the sect [HOW DO YOU ALL KNOW THAT?!]; LQG-expert on fighting demonic anything; MQF-regularly treats demonic afflictions and as such is the most researched on how it works)
In the dream I was so sure SQQ would reveal himself/declare he’d be the one to deal with it but awake I’m convinced he’d keep silent, so everyone has to go and meet the DC cuz they aren’t letting anyone go alone who knows what he plans to do
Anywho post dream territory but the day comes and SQQ is half convinced he’s about to be thrown out of the sect
DC: I’m looking for WYZ’s successor, Xiao Jiu
Everyone slowly turns to look at SQQ cuz by now everyone’s heard the sect leader call him that (insert theory that the Shen in his name was picked up soon after WYZ was killed. Like, on the way to meet the previous peak lords kinda soon and possibly stolen from one of the dead disciples)
SQQ steps forward with everyone’s gazes on him, seething (how dare he use that name) and keyed up from the last month of spiraling, deciding to out with a bang: successor! What fucking successor? To be such would imply the bastard taught me anything and even worse to suggest that I continued using it
DC: then how’d you know all his newly developed techniques? Like, you’ve definitely been seen using them when he trained you
SQQ: he didn’t train me in shit I was his lab rat he used to see if something would kill him before trying himself
Anywho, I have a lot of points that I wanna fit into this but idk where they’d go
Righteous cultivation is the growing of internal energy usually by advancing yourself in some way (physically, spiritually, mentally) and at points letting environmental energy pass around you, whereas Demonic cultivation is from siphoning of energy external to yourself, much faster but much more draining to your environment and others. Usually incompatible with human cultivation bases due to a lack of central, inborn demonic core causing most demonic cultivators to end up going insane from the patchwork of energies with no central focus.
Because of this any who stay somewhat sane gain a lot of power and recognition
WYZ theorized that if you were to steal a demonic core and consume it, you could solve the issue of energy focus. He used SJ to test this theory and found that it created a pseudo demon. The more SJ cultivated demonically, the more demonic features he presented.
SQQ has mysteriously never once gone to Qian Cao Peak. Not during his discipleship and definitely not during his tenure as peak lord. MQF hasn’t realized this cuz SQQ keeps sneaking in and fudging the papers.
His Shizun believed SJ was part demon and brought him into the sect as part test and part curiosity. They may or may not have also mildly experimented on him, but at least they helped him avoid qian cao
Eventually his Shizun came to the conclusion that he’s the only one on the peak with common sense and any strategic ability, so he became head disciple
SQQ is aware that his qi deviations are mostly due to having a demonic foundation and spending years trying to feed it with traditional cultivation. Not sure if this means he has a really tiny golden core or a really poorly fed demonic one or both at once like a half demon. I’m leaning towards both cuz of QJ Shizun experimentation
SQQ has retractable claws (he keeps them retracted and hidden under thick gloves), sharp teeth he must file down (they fall out after a year and the next set grow back sharper, during this time he almost always has his face covered by a fan), a deep-set craving for meat (and QJ serves only vegetarian food), and his ears have a slight point and rest slightly higher on his head than with human faces (he’s pretty sure they keep moving slightly higher each year to become like fox ears, like the fox core he consumed. He hates how it still affects him even without active demonic cultivation. He hides the ears with elaborate hairstyles and mourns his old body)
The other peak lords see his fan as him hiding his intentions from them and not showing his face as hiding dishonesty. The gloves are a testament to his refusal to touch what’s below him. His insistence on eating meat based foods at PL meetings emphasize his delicate constitution. His increasingly elaborate hairstyles display his arrogance for all to see. Listen they already think he’s a spoiled young lord the increased distance caused by his weird cultivation doesn’t help
SQQ wins the spar with the demonic cultivator with ease even when using only demonic cultivation techniques 15 years out of practice.
PLs are surprised to see the other DC fights exactly like SJ did when he first entered the sect (ruthless no holds barred street fighting. Daggers and concealed weapons of any kind other than spiritual swords. Plucking leaves flying flowers is used and now clearly seen as a demonic technique. SQQs fan blades are sharpened. Dust is thrown in eyes and joints are snapped and male parts are targeted.) They can easily see where SQQ must have learned it if that’s how all demonic cultivators fought (like demons). Even if they despise the lack of honor in this fight, at least it’s mutual
At some point during the fight SQQs more demonic traits are revealed (his hair coming undone to reveal his ears, sharp teeth on display, claws having long since torn through his gloves
Most demonic cultivators are self taught through trial and error and rarely have the privilege of learning to fight from masters. Additionally, due to their tendency to go insane, it’s common for most interactions between DCs to turn deadly at any point, so experienced DCs have no room for error or leniency. Fights are determined when one is trapped and begging for their life, and the other decides whether to spare them.
DC was not expecting the QJ PL to be this good, WYZs disciple or no
SQQ states that he was not WYZs disciple and reminds DC that he was the one who killed WYZ
DC asks why and SQQ explains that the three reasons he stayed with WYZ were a)blackmail, b)fear for his life, and c)to find his brothers remains and put him to rest. Imagine his surprise when he finds his brother doing perfectly well in a cultivation sect and WYZ about to kill him. Suddenly points b and c are irrelevant and point a is only removed upon WYZs death so it wasn’t a hard choice
The two walk to a nearby pavilion to discuss techniques and trade stories, with equal parts sarcasm, insults, and laughter
DCs are usually quite willing to trade less personal techniques outside of battle due to the “self taught” aspect of their cultivation
Somehow they end up talking about how brothels are safe spaces for DCs as they are great sources of information and less likely to call the Xianxia cops than inns
PLs are in the background shocked the two could go from a death match to the friendliest conversation they’ve ever seen SQQ display. YQY is salty and guilty in equal parts. LQG somehow comes to the conclusion that all of his and SQQs early interactions were actually SQQ trying to be friendly. SHQ sees this revelation play out in real time and points out that the murder attempt was a misunderstanding. QQQ is begrudgingly impressed to see prissy SQQ so willing to get down and dirty. MQF has been quietly having a crisis at the quality of his work to never realize this and comes to the realization that he’s never personally examined SQQ
MQF comes over and insists on checking over SQQ, who basically goes “fuck it. Sure” and all of my initial bullet points come to light
Everyone loses their shit finding out that SQQ is apparently famous among the DC community due to being the mad lad ex slave who not only convinced WYZ to take on a disciple, but also the one to kill that bastard.
End conclusion SQQ gains a DC friend and the other PLs agree to that as enrichment and stress relief for SQQ.
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THEY ARE DELIBERATELY STARVING GAZA, AND THERE IS NO INTERNET.
Scenes like as we see at GHF - run aid points in Gaza have "never been witnessed" before, a former UN aid chief Martin Griffiths told Al Jazeera.
"In my long experience, unique experience of the fact that food has become an opportunity for killing. I've never heard of such a thing in the past. I mean it's quite, quite, quite extraordinary, and it's deeply, deeply more then flawed it's just simply wrong."
Israel killed atleast 13 Palestinians seeking aid near a Gaza Humanitarian Foundation distribution point on Thursday morning. It's the latest in a string of deadly Israeli attacks on aid seekers in recent weeks. Authorities said 57 people were killed attempting to access aid on Wednesday. The Israeli military has admitted to shooting at Palestinians seeking aid. They say troops open fire when "suspects" deviate from the set routes. "
It's inadequate. That it's militarised. That clearly the IDF which has a camp near many of these sites deliberately are there to crush out the crowds. And that is also contrary to humanitarian experiences and it breeds distrust and it breeds dislike and it breeds more vengeance. It's not good for Israel's security or for the people of Palestine."
The UN has criticised the GHF, labelling it as a distraction from the ongoing atrocities and a waste of resources. Israel called its aid system a "dramatic success" despite mass killings. It has banned other experienced aid agencies from operating in Gaza. The UN refuses to supply aid via GHF due to it breaching humanitarian standards.
"The fact that the killing is added on is just a horrific extra. Aid is supposed to be a need for people who need it from the world and its not supposed to be transactional. This looks alot like that."
Palestinians are starving as a punishing months long blockade continues. The interest community has repeatedly called for an immediate ceasefire and for aid operated by experienced agencies to be let in.
I am sharing this to highlight the atrocities being committed by the Israeli army, even when the Internet in on, and all cameras are pointing at them, and while the world is watching...
But have you ever wondered what they would do if there was no Internet I'm Gaza?

PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE - I BEG YOU TO KEEP SHARING. WE CANNOT STOP SHARING. THEY NEED OUR VOICES, AND FOR US TO AMPLIFY THEIR VOICES AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE, MORE THAN EVER RIGHT NOW.
HERE IS A POST WITH A LONG LIST OF FUNDRAISERS, THERE FAMILIES MAY BE DISCONNCTED FROM THE WORLD RIGHT NOW, AND THEY NEED ALL THE DONATIONS AND SUPPORT THEY CAN GET, PLEASE DONATE IF YOU CAN AND SHARE THEIR FUNDRAISERS.
PLEASE, IF YOU CAN, DONATE AN ESIM HERE, ESIMS ARE THE ONLY WAY THOSE FROM GAZA CAN CONNECT TO THE WORLD RIGHT NOW, ESIMS ARE THE ONLY WAY PEOPLE FROM GAZA CAN COMMUNICATE WOTH THE WORLD RIGHT NOW. PLEASE, I'M BEGGING YOU, ANY AMOUNT WILL HELP AND CAN LITTERALLY SAVE A LIFE.
DONATE AN ESIM HERE AND HERE.
tagging for reach:
@thejasontoddarchives @anarchafemme @sweet-honey-bunnies @lesbiansforglados @dxppercxdxver @sheepory @elb4ckfl1po @millenniumidol @heart-forge @infectiouspiss @baweiii @butchfeygela @fox-guardian @oars @wolfythewitch @technofeudalism @pizzat-i @theomenroom @unearthprisonpanopticon @sealsdaily @ashwantsafreepalestine @ubernegro @bugmatics @kingoftheironcity @checkadii @wolf-tail @thi4f @mt-travaii @redbuddi @plasticduck @risoria @mollysunder @sister-lucifer @punkeropercyjackson @immediatebreakfast @khizuo @nevert-the-guy @ahaura @chanafehs @yourpersonaltimebomb @wolstinien @neechees @ankle-beez @webdings4 @silicacid @schroedingers-mooneater @lonniemachin @dykesbat @charlott2n @watermotif @yeetsintovoid @momorikoz @determinate-negation @girlinafairytale @yugiohz @rebel-girl-queen-of-my-world @painfully-unoriginal
#tumblr fyp#fypage#fypシ#fyp#gaza strip#gaza genocide#algorithm#foryopage#free gaza#awareness post#gaza solidarity#the gaza strip#gaza gofundme#free palestine#gaza fundraiser#gaza under attack#palestine#gaza under siege#palestina#palestin#palestinia#color pallet#palestinian cinema#save palestine#i stand with palestine#tagging for the algorithm:#cat#kpop#fashion#y2k
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on the topic of “homosexism” / “text is so misogynistic it [supposedly] becomes gay”
I want people to examine why they feel comfortable ascribing queerness to narratives so viciously misogynistic that even casual readers can’t really discuss the Accidental Gayness without ruefully nodding to the misogyny. it boggles the mind a bit that large chunks of a show like supernatural’s audience can possibly earnestly describe it as “a gay show” when it has always been and will always be a show with a conservative-white-american ethos primarily centered on “preserving the family” (what kind of family specifically?) and “protecting the country” (again you should ask: from who?)
granted this was also a show that was constantly updating itself based on the whims of its loudest fans, and given e.g. the frequent misogynistic fan backlash to any serious attempts to deviate from The Basic Formular (show spotlighting conventionally attractive shippable white men where women are only ever nonthreatening props at best and permissibly violated Demon Bitches at worst) it grew more rather than less conservative as the years went on and kowtowing to audience pressures became more and more of a necessity to extend the show’s lifespan. you will frequently see claims to the contrary from normie fans - notably, the very same D/C shippers who made it so that female love interests for dean became a complete nonstarter in the later years - who see the show’s eventual superficial attempts to incorporate more underdeveloped female characters, or even queer side characters that the fandom at large ironically barely notices (s12’s max banes might have been appreciated more for his atypical role if he wasn’t portrayed by a black man) - and insist that the show successfully Evolved With The Times. I couldn’t disagree more. rowena is one of the show’s most prominent female characters overall, and look at the key features of her characterization. look at mary’s. look at why charlie was a fandom-favorite female character compared to how fans received jo or ruby 1.0 or anna or amelia or amara.
my main point here is that the text is not “so misogynistic it becomes gay” - from the very beginning it valued relationships between male characters over relationships between men and women. those are the superior relationships because it is the men who represent the Ideal Hunter/Soldier/Protector, and the women they might become romantically entangled with are just that: romanceable distractions from the mission. “weak spots.” or they are innocent little girls who need to be taught not to distract from the mission. or they are evil seductresses and tramps who need to turn good or die. there is no change occurring here, unless you’re referring to safely-ambiguous fanservice scenes included to sate the shippers, who as the years went on became more of a demographic worth catering to for the sake of the numbers.
“becomes gay” is something you can say about how certain groups of fans engage with stories like this, but in terms of the source material the misogyny is a much much more foundational ingredient than any debatable element of queerness that arose specifically in response to fan interest. you can see this, by the way, in how supernatural jokingly insults both sides of its own slash fic community throughout the years. the misogyny is a crucial component of the show’s world and touches all of its characters in some way. the “gayness” is a punchline.
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pac: the person you are becoming in a year (TIMELESS) -`♡´-
hi everyone! im back again for a 2nd pac for you all <3 the response from my 1st pac was so amazing so thank you all for supporting me. i no longer feel motivated to do readings for celebrities but i won't be entirely opposed to doing them, i'll just be more selective on who i'm reading and what i'm reading about. any requests for pac topics will be much appreciated! thank you everyone :3
disclaimer: all for entertainment purposes only, free will exists and energies are subject to change. if it doesn't resonate then it might not be the pile or reading for you. remember that this is a general reading, so i'm channelling the energy of the majority, not a specific individual.
(italicised is the card on the bottom of the tarot deck which is meant to represent the subconscious/blind spot of the situation + rx means reversed)
photo cr: pinterest | dividers | personal readings | tips
PILE 1 -> PILE 2
PILE 3 -> PILE 4
pile 1 ~ 4 of cups, 3 of swords, 9 of wands rx, the moon
okay so i want to reiterate that you have free will and i am just the messenger, so you don't have to claim this if this doesn't resonate. i feel a sense of rigidity with your energy cause i keep seeing an image of someone trying to bend steel and clearly failing. you may be running away or avoiding a certain situation due to it not aligning with your life plan. some of you might have virgo placements as well, cause i keep hearing that you "have an image to upkeep" and deviating from your plan will cause you a lot of anxiety. you may struggle with being okay with the unknown, which leads you to constantly seek reassurance from others or tangible things (e.g achievements). The main message I'm getting from this is to surrender, which is easier said than done but once you let go of certain expectations you will be reborn and no longer feel the dread of past situations that haunt you. you might be unhappy with your progress over the year, but remember that consistency matters most and you can't keep moving forward on a foundation that is easily shaken. i keep hearing longevity, which makes sense why you might feel frustrated about not moving at the pace you hope for because whatever skill or resource you are building will follow you throughout your life. i also get reminded of chappell roan, as many people are referring to her journey with the phrase "sometimes it takes 10 years to become an overnight success". i do think that this next year, you will be focusing on your healing and learning to let go of anxieties regarding your self-perception. now, the moon on the bottom of the spread tells me that the person you are becoming in a year is still hidden, mainly due to the choice that you have when it comes to your growth. there will be a lot of truths regarding yourself and the people around you that will help you elevate into the best version of yourselves. spirit's encouraging you to embrace the unknown, and be aware of the power that you hold within yourself. you have autonomy and are the deciding factor on the outcome of your future, the universe is here to encourage and support you into the person you want to become.
i know the tarot was a bit gloomy, but the oracles actually show lots of success and strength that you will find within yourself. the valley card depicts a situation where whatever the universe throws at you, your resilience perseveres as you have more resilience than you give yourself credit for. i love the panther card, as it encourages you to explore the unknown and to not limit yourself on the preconceived outcomes that you may envision for yourself. this card is encouraging you to embrace fluidity and limit the need to control on how it will unfold. a situation that you may perceive to be a failure today could be what leads you to unfathomable success in the future. the unicorn card also encourages you to embrace the unknown, you are destined for great things and it's important to learn to trust the universe. believe that things are unravelling for you behind the scenes and that you don't always need tangible things to measure your growth/success. it's important to remember that your path should not be compared to anyone else's and placing certain beliefs limits the outcomes of the person you want to be.
oracle cards ~ valley: deep personal strength and peace that assure success. 22 panther: no expectations. unicorn.
channelled song ~ one step at a time by jordin sparks
pile 2 ~ 8 of swords, 9 of swords, page of pentacles rx, judgement rx
this spread tells me that this year will teach you how to stand on your own, and uproot beliefs that no longer serve you. you might be someone who experiences a lot of racing thoughts, and you might struggle to manage them. i feel that within a year, you will learn to manage those thoughts and learn to trust your intuition more than your anxieties. you will learn to separate those two patterns for you to have a guide on what/who to trust. i'm sensing you might be someone who often sees past the surface and your innate gift is the gift of knowing, but it often frustrates you when you don't see movement in your physical reality or when it doesn't align with your vision. spirit's reminding you that you are so powerful, but you need to learn to let go of those feelings of always needing to know, we as humans living in this reality aren't meant to know everything as life is meant to be experienced and lived rather than entirely orchestrated. i'm hearing that in a year you will learn to embrace the unknown and make decisions based on how you feel rather than what you think. i think you could be extremely sensitive to energies (twin!) and you're being taught to really practice trusting yourself and your gut even if you see it isn't logical. you have so much inner knowing or guidance but oftentimes need someone else or physical evidence to validate your intuition, and the universe is saying it doesn't always work like that. the universe is asking you to look within and build a stronger connection with your inner guidance system and believe that you truly know best. the universe is reminding you to operate from a place of gratitude and trusting even in things that you don't believe other people will understand. this is a never-ending journey and within a year it'll be only the beginning of you living your most authentic life.
the boat card details the possibility of receiving a gift or monetary help through your environment. you could be enrolling in a competition in which you succeeded at or experiencing your luck through help from another individual. the eagle describes someone who is meant to be the light-bringer in the darkness of life. while it's important to say that this is not your sole identity, it aims to help you acknowledge your unique vision and honour your inner knowing to help embrace its unique energy. you might have been struggling to "fit in", but the spirit's saying that that's not your path and you are meant to stand out to inspire others. while everyone brings a unique trait to the table, your trait is to understand your light and not dim it for anyone's sake. honour your gift by embracing beliefs that resonate with your authentic self and bringing them to the world to show that not everything needs to be full of doom and gloom. crow energy is incredibly potent, and it is often a symbol of the occult as crows often embody a meaning when it shows up in people's lives. while this meaning is often deemed as negative, people misunderstand the crow as crow energy can only be understood with a clear mind. this reiterates the point of trusting your inner guidance, and also listening to your body when it comes to different experiences (eating a new food, making a new friend, etc.). crows are often misunderstood, but the universe is reminding you to have faith in your vision and that you are your greatest ally.
oracle cards ~ boat: money or property through an inheritance, winning or windfall. 30 eagle: you are more. crow.
channelled song ~ talk to me nicely by blxst
pile 3 ~ the fool, the hierophant, strength rx, 8 of cups
a new version of yourself will emerge in a year, representing stability and authority. you will have a new beginning, whether in your career, love life, or personal life. spirit wants to remind you to embrace your wisdom and share your gift of communication, as i feel that in a year people will feel called to ask for your guidance more. i also noticed that your spread has the colours orange, red and yellow so they might be important colours. since this will be a new experience, you might feel uncomfortable/unsure of your capabilities, but spirit's encouraging you to find a silver lining as this will test your resilience and self-assurance. by next year you will release a lot of the restrictions that you have placed on yourself, and feel that you will find a newfound level of strength when it comes to your resilience/willpower. i do think that initially, it will feel difficult for you to accept that you've grown cause i see resistance, but you'll eventually shed those feelings of tension and wholeheartedly accept the new change coming in. this spread could also indicate that if you are in a relationship, in a year the relationship may be elevated commitment-wise. within a year you will be someone who will be looked at with a lot of wisdom, and how people will look at you with amazement as you feel like you are trudging your own path. i feel that there will be a new sense of yourself that will emerge that puts you in a position of influence, wether that'd be in your personal or professional life. i see you as a really humble individual, and that you are sometimes even unaware of the strength that you possess. while humility is one of your greatest traits, it's also encouraging you to be more comfortable with being acknowledged and given your flowers. learning how to be confident authentically in yourself and your abilities is something that you could be experiencing. spirit's also hoping to bring your attention to a "lack" mindset that you might operate on. i don't see this as a bad thing though, as this lack seems to stem from the hunger and desire to always do better and be the best. your determination is what makes you special, but it's also encouraging you to sometimes stop and smell the flowers as you can sometimes feel that once you achieve something it's time to set your sights on achieving the next. spirit's encouraging you to pat yourself on the back and practice gratitude, as oftentimes your feelings of lack can sometimes disrupt your ability to be present in reality. overall, the experiences you will have within a year will shape you greatly with 3 major arcanas coming out, and spirit's saying that you are so deserving but to also remember to celebrate yourself and your achievements.
again the tulip card touches on the romantic aspect as it signifies great passion. so within a year, you might feel a new sense of passion reignited with another person, if that doesn't resonate, it could be a new passion for your creations or hobbies or even work. the antelope is encouraging you to be more mindful of your intention through movement to release any pent-up emotions you might have. on days when you feel it's difficult, it's encouraging you to move by not letting your circumstances fully dictate your worth. you are smarter than you give credit for, and you inherently know how to bounce back from difficulties. it's reminding you to move and trust yourself/your body to help you get through difficult periods. the first thing i notice from the eagle card is how eagles fly alone and at high altitudes, and that in a year you will embody the bravery of the eagle by learning and accepting your true self and trusting the path that you're on. you might lose some people along the way, but you've learned to be good on your own. i see for those of you who are manifesting a relationship as well, this frequency will help you attract a stable/secure relationship.
oracle cards ~ tulip: great passion. 27 antelope: shake, release, heal, move on. eagle.
channelled song ~ priorities by tyla
pile 4 ~ 10 of wands, temperance rx, 6 of pentacles, queen of swords rx
my pile 4's, you seem to be the provider group. you might have many burdens due to your self-perception/upbringing/environment. people look to you to provide whether that'd be financially, emotionally, with your time, etc. (this could also be cause you're financing yourself). i see that you might be the type of person to keep to yourself when going through hardship, that could be because your environment is difficult and it's encouraged you to develop a mentality of "trudging it out". i'm seeing someone who has a wound on their back/the back of their head and is unaware of how big the wound is because you need to keep the show going. everyone around you is asking you "are you ok?" and your response is always "i'm fine, keep going" and while your resilience is admirable, it's worrying to them given that they're able to see how clear the wound is. spirit's encouraging you to not keep to yourself and share the burden, as i can see that there is a lack of vulnerability you share with others. one of my favourite sayings i learned recently is that "shared sorrow is half a sorrow, and shared joy is a double joy", and i feel that this saying could be relevant to what you're currently going through. i'm hearing that in a year, you will learn to shed those beliefs of thinking that you're a burden and that you will learn to incorporate more balance in your life. these experiences will help you cultivate the skill of expressing your feelings and emotions coherently, also improving your mind/body connection. i feel that you have a lot to give to others, whether that'd be time, wisdom, or even loyalty but you might feel that since it's not tangible or physical you don't have much to contribute. for that i say, those around you who get to experience the most vulnerable parts of you see you as an even stronger person, because you also inspire them to undergo the same transformation.
you could meet a person within a year that helps you undergo this transformation, or be the catalyst of that change. it could come out of the blue and take you by surprise, but their energy seems so delightful that i feel like over time your friendship or relationship with them will flourish. the phoenix card tells the story of a transformation and reminds you that your current reality does not define what you will experience ahead. i see you shedding beliefs that ultimately don't serve you, and truly help you become the person you see as your best. i'm feeling a need for control with this group, so the buffalo also reminds that setbacks are an opportunity for upliftment. although it is natural to want to grieve and feel your emotions, it's reminding you to not sit in that energy for too long because of your resilience. you have gone through your hardest days and will continue to do so as you will experience days filled with happiness and fulfilment that reflect on the work you put in yourself.
oracle cards ~ handshake: a meeting with a stranger could be important. 42 phoenix: transformation. buffalo.
channelled song ~ the fighter - gym class heroes ft ryan tedder
so that’s it for the reading! let me know if it resonated and if you have any feedback, questions or requests! my ask box is always open for a chat as well <3 sending you love and light always :) hope you enjoyed it!
#tarotblr#tarot reading#pac tarot#pac#pac reading#pick a card reading#pick a card tarot#pick a card tarot reading#pick a pile#pick a card#tarot readings#tarot cards#free tarot#free tarot reading#free tarot game#tarot#tarotcommunity#daily tarot#divination#oracle cards#oracle card#oracle#oracle card reading#oracle card readings#headers by fairytopea
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It would be great if we stopped treating cis men and trans men as if they’re 1:1 comparable with each other as a reason to diminish our oppressions, mostly because it’s completely ignorant of how trans men are placed within a cisgendered society. For example, when trans men talk about the high suicide rates amongst us, it is not the same as when MRAs talk about the high suicide rate amongst cis men, which I’ve seen people try to imply (while calling us TMRAs) in an attempt to blame us for our own problems.
For starters, the reasons behind those statistics are completely different. The high suicide rate amongst cis men is due to the patriarchal system that they have created, which still works on the misogynistic belief that men are stronger and more capable than women, and therefore leads to men being forcefully enlisted (or encouraged) into military service, or forced to suppress their emotions and mental health struggles. Yes, these are still important issues in and of themselves, but cis men are the ones who have the responsibility of dismantling the systems that created these issues in the first place. MRAs attempt to blame women for their problems instead of acknowledging that dismantling the patriarchy (which they don’t want to do) is on their shoulders.
Trans men, on the other hand, are living under that patriarchy. We did not create it, and we are not responsible for dismantling it. Our high suicide rates do come from a patriarchal system, but not one that we implemented. The patriarchy depends on people remaining within their assigned boxes, and any deviation from that is a threat that must be eradicated. I have seen people claim that masculinity is inherently rewarded underneath a patriarchal system, but this is a grave misunderstanding of what the patriarchy actually is. Masculinity is rewarded in cisgendered men (and only white cisgendered men at that, considering the hypermasculinisation of Black men that leads to high rates of police brutality and incarceration). It is not rewarded in trans men. Deviating from our expected womanhood is a threat to a system that depends on (cis) women conforming to being baby making machines and stay-at-home moms. If a woman tries to break away from that, or worse, transition into a man, they are perceived as broken. A defect in the system. A defect that needs to be destroyed before it begins to “infect” others. I really shouldn’t have to keep reminding people of the very real and very vocal paranoia of young girls “mutilating” themselves, because I don’t know how anyone can look at books like Irreversible Damage and laws targeting gender affirming care for trans youth (on the basis of “protecting vulnerable girls from transitioning”) and think that trans men are in any way rewarded for being masculine.
The patriarchy hates trans people. It hates trans men, women and anyone else who falls outside of the cisgender binary. It wants all of us wiped from its system so that the inherent nature of our beings doesn’t threaten its very foundation.
Trans men experience high rates of suicide because of this obsession with forcefully detransitioning us back into womanhood, which is fucking traumatic, because this can include sexual assaults, rapes and forced pregnancy in order to “fix” us. Not only that, but we are then excluded from conversations about reproductive health that still affects the majority of us on the basis of us being men (conveniently forgetting that we are not cis men) to the point of being rejected by gynaecologists or turned away from so-called “trans friendly” domestic abuse shelters, and I don’t need to emphasise how fucking dangerous that can be.
And I really want to reiterate that a lot of these consequences can affect all trans people (transphobia under a patriarchal system affects all of us, and no trans person has it inherently worse or better than another), whether in different ways or not, such as being excluded from DV shelters, but I’ve found that being a trans man specifically means a huge loss of community. Our identity as men means that we are barred from many resources that we desperately need, including queer-friendly spaces or access to any reproductive rights. This isolates trans men in a way that is not the same as how cis men feel isolated, because again: cis men created the patriarchy that hurts them. Trans men did not.
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