#i'm so sleepy i posted without checking for typos

[littleladymab]

Gen-uary Jubilee - Week 4: A Thing

Despite him being our King Arthur, we don't really know a lot about Atlas! Gotta fix that!!!

Written for @genuaryjubilee as part of @ficwip's server events!

Week 4 - A Thing (and also a Person if 'one's relationship with one's past life counts LMAO) Character: Atlas Koning Project: Knight Lite Words: 560

And finally, as always, to @bottlingsound!

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Excalibur is a heavy weight in his hand, and Atlas wonders how the fates conspired to give him the sword. 

He had lived for years before it knowing that, in some past life, he was Arthur. Whatever that meant in this day and age — it never did him much good in the day to day. He had greater things to worry about than what some ancient, mythological British king would think about his actions. 

But then Imogen had given him the sword. 

Or the sword had always been there, tied to him, waiting for its opportunity to be wielded against the forces of darkness again, and the Lady of the Lake had merely given him the thread with which to unravel the distance between myth and reality. 

And what use did he have for a sword? 

It wasn’t going to help him weigh court cases, or solve systemic injustice. It made him feel worse, even more helpless than he did before. 

All this power, and he couldn’t use it to help anyone. 

It’s fucking Excalibur, and he couldn’t even tell Liliya about it. Not that he told her about the whole King Arthur thing, because, well, who would believe that. He wouldn’t have believed it until suddenly: he did. 

And he met others who did. Who could do things like magic and summon swords to prove that it wasn’t just a bunch of adults thinking they were reincarnated knights. 

Atlas never had an overactive imagination. He considers himself a deeply logical person. It took a very long time to be logical about being able to summon a sword into his hand with just a thought. 

He once asked, “Aren’t I supposed to pull it from a stone to make it valid?” and Imogen had snorted so hard coffee came out of her nose. 

“That’s not a question King Arthur would ask,” Siobhan said while the other woman recovered. “You already know the answer to that.” 

After he thought about it for a moment, he did. It was an incredibly disconcerting feeling to have knowledge he knows he didn’t know previously. 

Caliburn is from the stone, back in ye olde Arthurian days. It belonged to his brother Kay. To Arthur’s brother; Atlas doesn’t have a brother. 

Excalibur is from the Lady of the Lake, who sat across from him at a little cafe, mopping up the last of her spilled latte with a napkin. 

So he never told Liliya all through their marriage — though she had met Imogen, Siobhan, and Robert. 

The sword remained a heavy weight on his heart, a useless instrument in his fight for good, a burden of a crown that would not do him any good. 

Eventually he learns how to wield the sword. Eventually he gets more knights — young kids who look up to him for guidance in more than just what it means to be born again defenders of a kingdom that doesn’t exist. 

And, always, he wondered just why Excalibur chose him. 

“Excalibur does not choose,” Alonso told him once. “This has always been you. Think of it as your dedication to your people, your duty to your community, that made you remember that Excalibur has always been yours.” 

Atlas grips the hilt, hefts the sword, and feels the weight of responsibility across his shoulders, and wonders if this is how Arthur ever felt. 

[thecirculararchive]

One of your posts pissed a question from me, and I swear this is genuine, Tumblr has decided not to put me on the Endo side of syscourse.

What things are the Endo community doing that makes people hate them so much? And why are a lot of people saying that endogenic systems aren't valid? I'm genuinely confused.

Also, sidenote. If it's a long post to answer this, I am very sick, and can't focus long enough to read long posts. If you could, please answer this in like a week if it's a long post, or maybe @ me in the comments/reblog and @ me so I can read it when I'm feeling better.

This is all genuine, I swear.

I'm stuck and I also didn't check for typos, so I do apologize in advance if this is hard to read.

Hey, I waited for a bit to answer this. @bruno-madrigals-child-vivienne, here you go.

Preface: I'm an endo-supporter I guess, and I also am not the brightest and do make mistakes, so have patience with me.

Endogenic Systems are systems that claim to have formed without trauma. There's a lot more nuance there, but that's the general summary version. Many people say endogenic systems are not valid because they say systems cannot form without trauma. The proof that is stated for this is the DSM and the fact that studies on DID/OSDD/DDNOS/Etc systems have been done that show how trauma has changed the brain, which Endogenics claim not to have. Numerous Endogenics shoot back that lack of proof is not the same thing as proof.

The Endo community is hated for a few reasons, but here's some off the top of my head:

* Ableism. There are a lot of ableist endogenic systems that are very vocal. I'm of the theory that they're not INTENDING to be ableist, but due to the society we live in, it happens very naturally. Things like the heavy focus of "I'm endogenic because I don't feel distress over my alters" due to the DSM thing where it says you need to have dysfunction to be a system? Which. Isn't really the full picture.

* "Sysmed" and "Traumascum". These are two words coined by Endogenics to be used against anti-endos. They're based on LGBT+ terms (particiularly from the transgender community) and refer to "system medicalists" (systems who believe you can't be a system without trauma). The usage of these terms caused many people to immediately lose their shit, because of a lot of reasons. These reasons include: It's offensive to trans people/systems, it's calling traumatized people scum, it's stolen from LGBT+ communites, and it's ableist to insult traumatized people.

* Coining New Terms. It's a big thing in the endogenic community to make new terms up to explain system and alter origins. These origins very often overlap with trauma system origins, and frequently cause anger in traumagen communities.

* Misinformation. This is, by far, the biggest imo. Endogenics do spread misinformation frequently about DID/OSDD/DDNOS/Etc. Many people online are greatly confused by these disorders, and sometimes, endogenics (who are not traumagenic systems and have never experienced being a traumagenic system) speak up when they probably shouldn't. They explain their situations and life, when it's really a traumagenic who should be speaking.

This is a really really brief, sleepy overview. It's probs inaccurate in places and could be better worded. But that's the fast, quick, and dirty version. Hope this helps.