#it's late so if anyone could warn us of spelling errors we would appreciate it

[dewdrop-collective]

I think a big part of the reason that I went from anti-endo to endo-safe was absolutely due to how starkly different the communities felt.

Anti-endo communities were hard to engage with. Sure, some of them would focus on their support for each other more than their hatred of endogenic systems. And that's great! However, when you are brought together by your dislike of a certain group, you can't help but feel the hate permiate into so much of it. It always happened eventually. Anti-endo communities had such a focus on systems who were "fake" that I couldn't help but worry I was one of them, no matter how much they told me it was "just endos" they were concerned about.

The endo community (at least the parts I've engaged with and were easy to find) were so kind and respected me as a system, no matter how I felt or my plurality presented. Simply knowing we could find joy in our plurality allowed us to strive for so much more than we had thought possible before.

As a traumagenic system, we've improved so much with our symptoms and communication as a result of the positivity and acceptance we recieved. When we joined communities where we could be authenticallly ourselves (no matter what), we came together and faced so much less conflict between each other. And the conficts we did have, we realized that we could solve them together rather than alone.

When you are constantly doubting if you are "actually a system", you start to push the others away, and that made our dissociation and amnesia so much worse. I understand being careful of self-misdiangnosis, it can put you on the wrong path for how you learn to manage your symptoms. At the same time, the sentiment I often heard from endogenic systems when I was struggling with doubt and denial was very simple: "So what if you're not a system?" In short, it was okay to be wrong.

And that was huge for me. I realized that, no matter if I was a system or not, the techniques I used to improve ourselves and communicate with one another beneficial to me. At the end of the day, even if I wasn't a system after all, the skills I had found we invaluble to my health and well-being. So when I fall into denial spirals, no matter what I think about myself, I now know that I don't need to deprive myself of what has helped me, even if it is a "system thing." I don't feel scared to use these skills anymore (even in denial spirals), beacuse the line between what systems and non-systems or singlets can/can't do suddenly wasn't a big deal or a battle of "who can do what."

Our plurality is no longer a burden or a scar to us. It is simply who we are. We've learned so much about each other and ourselves since we've been accepted in full, and since we've learned to accept others. Endogenic communities have helped us (a traumagenic system) probably more than they'll ever know, and we're forever grateful for that.

So thank you, endogenic systems.

[writtingfiction]

Golden deer Christmas party its a fun one my dudes (most competitive house they are having compeative Christmas parties)

it’s not two months late, it’s not two months late and filled with grammar errors.

pairing: None

words: 2k

Now, like usual, another event was coming up in the monastery that Byleth never truly experience. She doesn’t quite remember how the festivals were as a small child but over the past few years, she had been hired as extra security with her dad and company. Nevertheless, this year was different. She was a professor, with students that she taught. So, she wasn’t too surprised when the class approached her and asked about her experience with the Yule festivities.

“I’ve never truly participated in the festivities unless you count being on guard.” Byleth said. There were some gasps, and some students shaking their heads.

“No, no this won’t do.” Hilda said, and the rest of the golden deer nod their heads.

“Why don’t we throw you our own Golden Deer Party?” Claude said and there was unanimous agreement among the class, however, Byleth disagrees.

“No, you guys won’t be throwing anything, even if it is for my sake. The only celebration that I’ll be participating in is the ball. Am I understood?” Byleth said, giving her students her usual blank stare. There are some sighs but they nod their heads but this information doesn’t stop them.

—

It’s about a week and a half before the ball and she sees Claude and Hilda chatting, well, whispering like a pair of nobles. The hot gossip that’s being shared between them obviously important to catch their attention. For a moment she thinks to leave them be but Byleth remembers the reputation the house leader has and turns back around and walks back towards them. She could only get so close before they notice her.

“Professor!” Claude greets her happily, Hilda smiling right beside him. She gives the two of them a wary look.

“What are you planning?” Byleth asked, arms crossing. Claude feigns hurt, hand placed on his chest.

“Oh Teach, you would think your favourite student is doing something bad? Oh how you wound me.” Claude puts on the theatrics quite thick and it only makes it more obvious that he’s planning something.

“Yes, the theatrics aren’t for you.” Byleth’s narrowing gaze lands on Hilda. She looks cool and collected, however, she could press her and get something. “What about you Hilda, surely Claude can’t convince you to do anything physical.” The batting of eyelashes on confirms that the two of them are planning something.

“You’re right, Professor. Tried to get me to help him carry some oddly heavy boxes to his room.” Hilda said, shaking her head. “You should know better than to have a lady carry heavy things. Raphael would be a better option.” The look on Claude’s face though, tells Byleth that Hilda is telling some truth.

“Hilda, you said… ugh.” Claude straightens for a moment, sighing.

“So I was right, what are you planning?” Byleth pressured once more. Claude had a small frown on his face.

“Just some supplies for some concoctions I want to brew. I’m not going to create anything that will harm anyone, just some light experimentation.” Claude said. Byleth looks behind the two of them to see two large boxes. She gives Claude an unimpressed look. “I’m prone to not get it right the first time and occasionally break the tools. Come on, Teach, give me a break here.”

“I’ll let you go free this one time. If I see you trying to do this again I’m checking inside those boxes and confiscating what’s in them.” Byleth lets Claude off with a warning before she leaves them. The pair watches their teacher walk off towards the church, waiting till she’s out of sight before letting out a breath. A swift glare sent towards Claude and Hilda is ready to hit him.          

“We almost got caught!!” Hilda hissed.

“But we didn’t get caught! If it was anyone else, we would have been caught.” Claude said. “Now, are you going to help me carry these or not? Raphael is getting the rest.” There’s a heavy sigh that comes from Hilda’s lips.

“You owe me for this, and for saving your butt from the professor!” Hilda said.

— —

A couple of days pass, a week till the ball starts. The church has started to put up decorations for the ball. The morale was a mix among the students but for the most part, they were in high spirits. Especially the Golden Deer students, chatting with each other as if they’ve already celebrated. Marianne seemed to be more in the company of others as of late. Byleth was sure to notice, curiosity creeping in the more she noticed her students crowding together more and more.

She happens to catch Lysithea and Marianne together. Muttering to themselves as they muse over some magic books. However, she’s sure that isn’t the book they’re supposed to be learning from. It’s an odd white and red book compared to the rest of the pile of books that surround them. Byleth approaches them, however before she has the chance to get too close, Lysithea and Marianne turn around.

“Professor!” The two girls say in unison.

“Girls. What are you doing?” Byleth’s voice doesn’t portray anything firm, if not soft. Lysithea is the first to speak.

“We are looking into different spell books to help Marianne understand the concept for a spell.” Lysithea speaks with confidence, it’s nearly enough to convince the young professor.

“What spell?” Byleth said. Lysithea seems at a loss for words.

“Fimbultr.” Marianne’s quiet voice breaks the silence and Byleth nods.

“I’ll leave you to your studies. Take care to not overwork yourself.” Byleth said, leaving the girls to themselves in the library. When Byleth is gone, Lysithea deflates into her chair. Marianne turns back to the book and continues to silently read over the page.

“Thank you, Marianne, I think you saved us there.” Lysithea speaks up. Though she doesn’t see it, there’s a small smile that appears on Marianne’s lips, whispering a soft ‘you’re welcome’.

—— —— ——

Four days till the ball starts and only three days before the Golden Deer Yule mini party for their professor. Spirits higher than usual but not that the professor would notice. She thought that their excitement was for the ball. So when she came across Leonie and Ignatz arguing over something it caught her off guard.

“No no no, Ignatz. Why would you use those colours? It’s not— it doesn’t go with the theme.” Leonie said. The noise that came from Ignatz was something Byleth had never heard before.

“It—it does not go with the theme?” Ignatz said in disbelief. Byleth peered into the classroom. The two students were facing a table looking at ribbons of different colours. Their backs facing the entryway. “I’m sorry but you’re wrong Leonie. The way the colours compliment each other is much nicer if we go with this arrangement instead of this awful, eye-poking colour.”

“Just because you know the arts, doesn’t mean my arrangement isn’t totally an option!!” Leonie argued. Ignatz doesn’t usually get so fired up about things. Byleth decided to step in, she didn’t want Leonie tearing off Ignatz's arms off.

“Leonie, Ignatz, what seems to be the problem?” Byleth approaches tentatively, although her students don’t seem to notice. There’s a huff that comes from Leonie’s lungs and a relieved look on Ignatz’s face.

“Professor, I’m glad you’re here. We were discussing what arrangement of ribbons to put up for the…” Ignatz trails off, hesitant to say his next words. Before any suspicion can doubt Byleth’s thoughts, Leonie speaks up saving Ignatz.

“For the ball. This will be decorations we were told to set up in the classroom.” Leonie explains. Byleth nods and approaches the table to see a beautiful arrangement of red, green and white. There’s a second arrangement with a bold colour choice. Blue, green and orange, the ribbons were tangled together, not exactly a good combo.

“We would appreciate your opinion professor, settle this argument for us.” Ignatz said, regaining his voice. Byleth nods. She doesn’t let them sit in silence for long before she points to the ribbons Ignatz weaved together.

“This one would be better for the celebrations.” Leonie frowns deeper at her teachers' words while Ignatz’s pride grows. He does not show it but it shows in his eyes.

The three of them talk for a short while afterwards before Byleth leaves them. She misses the way her students scramble to grab more of the appropriate ribbon and hurry to have someone watch the door this time. Too close again for the Golden Deer, caught almost again for the third time. They hoped they wouldn’t have any more incidents and luckily they didn’t.

— — — —

The day of the celebration of the Golden Deer Yule party for their professor was going to go off without a hitch. Claude had the perfect plan to lure the professor. Saying he needed her help with a recent subject, he made a point to fudge his scores a little on the last quiz so that way this would seem more believable. However, when classes were finished and everyone parted ways to get ready for tomorrow for the ball and to finish the last details on the classroom since the professor was gone; He had trouble finding his teacher.

He went to the training grounds to see if his professor was there, but she wasn’t there. Next was the mess hall, wasn’t there either. He checked the main hall, followed by the main gate and then the pond. Claude scratched his head, wondering where his professor was. His eyes landed on the greenhouse, realizing he hasn’t checked there. His feet take him there.

He pushes one of the large doors open to the greenhouse. At first, he doesn’t see anyone, but venturing further he manages to spot someone. A smile appears on his lips, it’s his teacher. Her hands are packing down dirt, she just finished planting some new seeds. He tries not to sneak up on her.

“Teach!” He calls out, making sure not too loudly. Byleth pauses, turning around and seeing Claude. She nods before standing, brushing the dirt from her hands.

“Claude, to what do I owe the pleasure?” Byleth said.

“You know how I got that low score about tactics on the last quiz? I was hoping to get your help.” Claude said, He receives nothing but a nod. “Perfect, I have my notes back in class.”

“I’ll follow.” Byleth said.

The two of them left the greenhouse. Claude talking about the examples from the book Byleth gave him last week. Byleth gives some pointers although she doesn’t feel like she has to. She knows Claude doesn’t need these pointers, he’s making an amateur mistake. What did he have up his sleeve? But then again, he could truly need help. Byleth takes the latter and decides to take his ask for help seriously. She’s about to ask what specifically he needs help with when they walk into the classroom.

The classroom is brightly lit, the golden deer students and some others from the other classes throw confetti and yell ‘Surprise!’. She can see the ribbons she chose strung all across the room. There are some snacks and a large bowl of juice. It’s a warm feeling and the scent of herbs brought Byleth back to when she was a young girl seeing all the folks in the tavern, laughing and dancing the night away in celebration. The clearest part of the memory when she tried to join the festivities but ended knocking over her father’s drink onto him. The momentary pause before the largest of grins and hearty laughter was a memory she cherished.

“Thank you.” It was a whisper from Byleth but Claude heard it. He turned his head from his peers to her, the softest look he’s seen from her. A small warm smile on her face as she looked at her students. A small blush appeared on his face at how warm and happy she looked to be with them.    

“For you, teach, any day.”

[minervahopebeyond]

Blood Petals.

Hello! I hope you like this one! Tell me what you thought in the comments✨

Ps. I’ve checked but sorry if you find any errors in this one (grammar or vocabulary)

Chapter 20: The curse.

He tried to warn Severus about Theodore. The man just said that he was fully aware about the situation but the boy was still at school, so he was starting to doubt that his godfather had informed the Headmaster at all. That’s how Draco found himself asking for a meeting with Dumbledore on Friday.

He spoke the password that professor McGonagall informed him and entered the office. When he got in, the old man was sitting on his desk, drinking a cup of tea.

Dumbledore looked more and more thin as the year went by, the blond boy thought that it was not a good look on him. He looked sick.

“Mr. Malfoy. How are you, boy?”

Draco wanted to cut directly to the point, formalities be damn.

“Good. Thank you, sir. I came here with information. I think that one of the Slytherins is-“ The man interrupted.

“If you are talking about your friend Theodore Nott, I’m aware of the situation. Severus told me.”

Draco felt like a weight had been lifted. He thought, for a second, that Severus was a lying bastard. He wasn’t ,though. Still a spy. Good.

“Then expel him, Headmaster. Before he does something that he’ll regret. I beg you.”

The old man looked at him with kind eyes and a soft smile. He fixed his glasses before talking.

“I don’t think that’s an option, Mr. Malfoy. My duty is to care about all the students, even the ones that make the wrong choices.” Draco was looking at him like he had lost his mind. Was this man senile?? “If I expel him, and he fails on his mission, he would, at the least, face torture; I don’t think that’s fair for a sixteen year old, don’t you agree?” Dumbledore said as he took another sip of his tea. “However, since you are close to him... let him know that we can provide shelter for him, that he has options. I would appreciate it very much.”

Draco only nodded before being dismissed by the Headmaster, telling him to get back to class. What the fuck?

It was ridiculous.

‘Yes, come to Hogwarts. It’s the safest place in the entire magical world. We only hired followers of the Dark Lord accidentally a couple of times, no biggie... And yes, we did also have a three hundred year old monster inside of a hidden secret chamber under the school, that also happened to kill the students ( no, nobody asked Salazar Slytherin why the fucking pipes were so ridiculously big). There was also that time when the dementors almost killed a student in a quidditch match... And let’s not forget about last year, when someone from the ministry used a blood quill as punishment. Which brings us to this moment; yes, we are aware that we currently have a sixteen year old Death Eater inside of the castle, thank you for asking.’

Draco was glad that he was going to die before having kids because, if he were a parent, he would most likely set the school on fire if they got to live even one of the things that Potter had to endure in the last six years of his life.

And now he was thinking about Potter again. Fuck. Draco sighed as he walked to class again.

He really wished that Theo would listen to him. Or Dumbledore. Or Severus. ANYONE.

————————

He wasn’t talking to Potter. Actually, he wasn’t talking to the Golden Trio in general because they refused to tell him the truth.

Draco looked worst everyday. Pansy and Blaise tried to make him talk to the three Gryffindors; saying that he didn’t need to fight with people right now, he needed friends. The blond boy ignored them. What he needed was to find a way of convincing Theodore of stopping whatever plan he had in mind.

Unfortunately, the boy was avoiding him. He sealed his curtains at night, to prevent Draco from climbing into the bed; and disappeared after classes. The blond boy couldn’t approach him like this.

He was so tired, it was almost Easter Holidays and everything was the same. Draco was alone, the coughs were getting worst... He felt the physical need to be close to Potter everywhere, every fiber of his being was begging him to fix this. He ignored the feeling daily.

The blond boy knew that he was pushing everyone away, but the bloody adults in charge of the fucking school were just letting things flow. It was his responsibility now. He just had to find a way of stopping this.

He had just finished Charms, when he decided to take the long way back to the dungeons, he wanted some quiet... at least for a while.

The hallway from the second floor was, almost always, desolated. Nobody went there because of Myrtle. That’s why he was surprised to hear the girl-ghost talking with someone that day.

“Do you want me to get help?” She asked in a low voice.

The water from the tap was running, Draco could hear it flowing the bathroom.

“No... I just need to be alone for a minute.”

Draco knew that voice. Theodore sounded strangled, like he had been crying. He quietly entered the bathroom.

The boy was sitting on the floor, robes all drenched. His hair was a mess, eyes red with his wand on his hand. Hazel eyes were looking at him, scare. ‘One bad move and this could all go to shit, this is your chance, Draco. Take it.’

He walked slowly to were the boy was and knelt in front of him, looking at him with kind eyes.

“This is what I was trying to tell you, Theo. You don’t want to do this.”

Tears were starting to course down the boy’s cheeks, as he looked away.

“It’s too late. I don’t have a choice.” His voice came out weak. Draco got a little closer to him, pushed the hair away from his face. He could swear that Theo leaned in to the touch for a moment.

“You do. Dumbledore knows.” The boy widened his eyes, alarmed. “He knows, and he is letting you try this because he fears that if he expels you right now, you could get hurt by them” Then, the blond boy looked at Theodore with determination. “He is offering you shelter, if you want it. Take it, Theo. I beg you.”

The brunette snorted, rolling up his sleeve.

“This will not go away with shelter, it’s a biding contract.”

“I knew it.”

Draco froze. That voice. Shit, not now! He was so close! He looked up and saw Potter looking at them. The green eyes shifted between hate and disappointment. The daffodils were starting to hurt him.

“You acted like I was crazy but you knew, didn’t you??” The dark-haired hissed at him.

“Yes. But Potter I’m trying to-“

“You are helping him! Look what he is.“ he said with a severe tone. Draco couldn’t contain the coughs anymore, petals were falling from his mouth.

Theo pointed his wand at the boy that stood in front of him.

“Back the hell off, Potter.”

The dark haired boy pointed his wand right back at him, and Draco wanted to just stop coughing so he could do something about this.

Theo fired the first spell, obviously. They were wrecking the bathroom. They weren’t listening to him. Draco felt so impotent as he saw everything happen.

“Cruc-“ Started to cast the hazel-eyed boy. Draco screamed as loud as he could.

“DON’T!”

And at the same time: Potter threw another spell at his opponent.

“Sectumsempra.”

Draco didn’t know what it was when he heard it, but he quickly discovered that the spell was actually a curse.

Theo fell to the ground so fast, his white shirt starting to turn red from the blood. He ran an threw himself on the floor next to the boy. The blond boy could hear Myrtle going to get help.

“Shh, Theo. It’s okay. Somebody is coming.” He kept saying as he held the boy. The hazel eyes looked at him, lost. He couldn’t contain the tears, the petals escaped between sobs. ‘How could he have done this? It’s Potter. He is a good person. Why would he hurt someone like this. I just-‘

“Malfoy... I-“ He glared at the boy, who was looking at him with fearful green eyes, holding his wand tightly.

“Get the hell out of my sight.” He hissed at him.

The boy had started to turn around when Severus entered the bathroom. Confused eyes on his face, looking between Potter and him.

He knelt next to the boy on the floor and began to cast the counter-curse.

Draco held Theo the whole time.

——————-

He was at the infirmary, lying in the bed next to Theodore. He had asked Severus to spend the night, and because he saw him really upset, his godfather allowed it.

The boy was still unconscious. Draco was looking at him, trying to fall sleep... But the scene from the bathroom kept repeating in his head. He shouldn’t have approached Theo, if he hadn’t, then maybe this wouldn’t have happened.

He heard soft sound of steps, when Draco turned around to look, he couldn’t hear them anymore.He narrowed his eyes.

“Potter.” He called. At first, nothing happened; then the boy appeared next to him, taking off his invisibility cloak.

“Hi.” The green-eyed said with a weak voice.

“What do you want? Are you going to actually kill him now?” He spoke with venom in his voice. The daffodils were burning him. Draco couldn’t even look at him.

“I just... I didn’t know what the spell did.” Potter said in a low voice.

Draco turned to look at him, furious. That was the great excuse? Really? He was suppose to believe that? He snorted.

“Get out.” The blond boy was so mad. He didn’t even cared when he started to have a coughing fit while Potter walked away.

—————————

“Draco, the Golden Trio is outside.”

He was sitting on the couch at the Slytherin common room, revising his notes from transfiguration. He didn’t even looked up at Pansy.

“Tell then to leave, they are going to miss the train.” He heard his best friend sighed before walking outside. She wasn’t gone for long.

“They are being extremely insistent.”

Draco pushed his books aside and started to walk towards the door. When he got outside, the Gryffindors were looking at him with hesitant eyes.

“What do you want?” Potter was the first to respond.

“We have to leave. Where is your luggage?” He asked with confused eyes. Draco crossed his arms.

“Next to my bed. I’m staying here.” He spoke with a flat voice. The fucking flowers started to move aggressively, hurting him.

He could see the Weasley and Granger looking at their best friend; worried. Potter was staring at him, hurt eyes on his face.

“You didn’t tell Dad or Padfoot. They are expecting you. Come on, just-” Draco just shrugged.

“I’ll send a Patronus. Anything else?”

Since they didn’t answer, the blond boy wished them a ‘Happy Easter’ and went back inside to his common room.

[cordonia-continued]

In The Shadows

Book: The Royal Romance 1 & 2. Bastien’s story.

Pairings: Bastien. Liam x MC (Riley Taylor)

Warnings: slight swearing, slight angst

A/N: I thought it would be nice to see things from Bastien’s POV. Any similarities to anything else out there is unintentional and is purely coincidental. I fell in love with the TRR series late and have only just got into it. I felt that some of the chapters just needed a bit more - it goes along with my previous fanfic where Riley went back to New York briefly after the coronation ball.

All characters belong to Pixelberry.

Apologies in advance for any typos, grammar or spelling errors.

Chapter 2

A few days after the masquerade ball there’s a knock at Bastien’s office door ‘Come in.’ He summons. The door slowly opens and Maxwell Beaumont stands on the other side his hands wringing themselves together nervously, his eyes darting from Bastien’s face to the back wall, his voice small and unsure ‘You asked for me?’

‘Ahh Lord Beaumont yes I did, come in.’ Bastien pulls out a leather computer chair from the desk next to him and places it a foot away directly in front of his own, as he sits down in his own leather desk chair he he motions for Maxwell to sit down. The poor young lad looks uncomfortable and nervous as hell as he sits on the edge of the chair. Bastien enjoys tormenting Maxwell too much, toying with him is just too easy he thinks to himself.

‘So, Lord Beaumont’

‘Please call me Maxwell all my friends do.’ Maxwell tries a smile at Bastien, he doesn’t know why the bodyguard makes him so nervous, well it’s probably got something to do with the silent but deadly looks he gives, that and the all the muscles that strain beneath the older mans suit. Oh, and the fact that he could snap him in half in an instant doesn’t help.

‘We’re not friends’ Bastien deadpans, the stern look on his face unmoving. Maxwell audibly gulps.

‘I need to know everything you know about Lady Riley Taylor.’

‘I’ve already told you everything I know about her.’ Maxwell looks at the bodyguard in confusion ’She was our waitress, we ordered whiskey and burgers, well Drake ordered whiskey and burgers, the rest of us actually wanted steak but you know how Drake is about these things, and she said the closest we’ve got to filet mignon is...’

‘Maxwell’ Bastien growls leaning forward.

‘Sorry’ Maxwell blushes, he knew he was babbling, he had a tendency to do so when he was nervous, he sat back in his chair, trying to put some distance between himself and the intimidating bodyguard.

‘She seemed to get on with Liam well- in fact I haven’t ever seen him so happy as he was when he was with her, so the next day me and Drake went back to her bar and waited for her. We asked her to come back with us and she did. That’s all there is to tell’

Bastien nods his head. ‘So you didn’t go back to her apartment with her?’

Maxwell shakes his head ‘No, we waited for her in the limo.’

‘And what about since then? She’s been living with you right? You must have learnt something about her.’

‘Oh yes!’ Maxwell exclaims, suddenly animated ‘She’s amazing, she knows all the best dance moves and has great taste in music, she puts all the other suitors in their place and yet still holds herself with grace and dignity, errr sometimes she swears but me and Bertrand are trying to drum that out of her, well Bertrand is, I think it’s kinda cute.’ Maxwell’s cheeks grow pink once again.

Oh great him as well, what the fuck has this girl got that’s got them all acting like dribbling idiots? Bastien wonders.

‘No, no, I mean what do you know about her, about her background where she’s come from, her past? Has she told you anything about her family? Her parents? What school she went to? Where she grew up? Anything like that?’

‘Oh um...’ Maxwell looks up to the ceiling tilting his head to the side thinking about the last few days with Riley ‘No, no she hasn’t. We don’t really talk about stuff like that to be honest, we’re too busy teaching her about the court and it’s many protocols.’

Shit. He knew it was a long shot asking the young Beaumont, as nice as the guy is, he’s not the brains of the family. Maybe he should have asked Bertrand he thinks, but the more astute of the two brothers would know that Bastien hasn’t been able to do his job properly, hasn’t been able to find out about the American’s past. He doesn’t want it to get out that he’s so far failed, he’s got enough on his plate with Constantine’s demands on him and arranging the security for the social season. Damn it.

‘Ok Beaumont you can go, and I’d appreciate it if you didn’t tell anyone about this meeting.’ He gives Maxwell his most menacing stare toying once again with the poor lad, chuckling to himself inside.

Maxwell’s up like a shot reaching for the door handle ‘oh yes of course, my lips are sealed’ he makes a key locking motion on his lips and hurries through the door.

Back to the drawing board Bastien thinks frustrated. He picks up the phone to give an old friend of his in the FBI a call, he needs help on this one, it is as matter of national security after all.

The weeks of the social season pass in a blur, Bastien is rushed off his feet organising the palace guards and personal security teams for the nobles and the Royal Family.

He gets a message that Constantine has summoned him to his chambers. He knocks on the Kings sitting room door and waits.

‘Enter’

Bastien opens the door to find the King standing at the large lead lined window

looking out over the lush green lawns of the palace grounds.

‘Ah Bastien there you are my fellow’

‘Your Majesty’ Bastien bows to the King and enters the sitting room closing the door behind him ‘You wanted to speak with me?’

That in itself wasn’t strange, they often discussed the palace security details outside of their morning briefing, especially when it involved leaving the security of the palace walls.

‘Come, have a drink with me.’ The King walks over to a drinks cart stocked full of decanters of spirits, without waiting for an answer he pours two glasses of amber liquid.

‘Your Majesty, I’m on duty’ Bastien’s not a big drinker at the best of times, preferring to keep a clear head in case he’s needed to respond to a threat at anytime.

‘Nonsense, you can indulge an old man this once.’ The King hands a glass to Bastien and knocks his own against it.

‘What are we drinking to?’ Bastien asks

‘Hmm’ The King pauses thoughtfully ‘to creating our own destiny’

Bastien raises an eyebrow and his glass to The King.

‘Ya mas’ he toasts before taking a sip of the fiery liquid. He remains silent waiting for The King to fill him in on the reason for this impromptu drinking session.

‘Bastien, I need you to do me a favour.’

‘Of course Your Majesty, anything.’

The King runs a hand along his cleanly shaven jaw thoughtfully. ‘It’s of a delicate nature, I need your discretion on this.’

‘Your Majesty I have served you faithfully for over twenty years now, you know my discretion is guaranteed’

‘Of course I realise that Bastien, it’s just, this is for The Prince, it’s in his best interests, only he might not see it that way.’ Lines crease the old mans forehead.

Bastien nods ‘Ok, go on.’

‘I need you to get rid of the American’

Bastien’s eyes widen and his voice falters ‘Ahh. Sir I understand, but Prince Liam is really quite taken with her, it wouldn’t be right to, um, get rid of her.’

The King lets out a deep throaty laugh ‘Good God Bastien what do you think of me! I don’t mean kill her!’ He laughs again and Bastien lets out a breath thank God for that he thinks. He’ll do a lot to serve his crown and country but murdering a suitor is way past his job description.

‘I mean get rid of her from the running, make it so she can’t stay as a suitor. Preferably before the coronation, it won’t give the right image to do it after he’s chosen her. And knowing my son as I do, he will choose her.’

‘Yes Your Majesty, I think he will. However surely it’s his choice to make. Are you sure that’s what you want? You must have noticed as well as I have how happy The Prince is when he’s with her. And the press seem to love her.’

Constantine straightens his posture and takes a sip of his scotch ‘It’s not really his choice to make. This whole ridiculous farce is just for show. He will marry the best choice for the country, not whoever he wants. That’s why I’m asking you. I’m not a fool Bastien, I’ve seen the looks he gives her, you’ve kept me updated on their antics, their romantic rendezvous. He’s just lucky he’s got you looking out for him, not letting him get carried away and caught in a compromising position by the press. It wouldn’t do for the crown to be dragged down in some gutter press scandal involving my youngest son. I don’t want Liam to be likened to his brother and the reputation he made for himself.’

Bastien clears his throat. ‘Your Majesty he’s been quite the gentleman so far.’ He feels bad that he’s required to report back to The King on Liam’s life, but that’s part of his job and he knows if The King found out something that Bastien hadn’t told him there would be hell to pay.

‘Exactly - so far. He’s a young man Bastien, and as old as I am I do remember what that’s like, he won’t be able to keep that up for much longer.’ He gives a rueful smile and turns his back to his bodyguard, moving to stare out of the window once again at the palace gardens beyond. He shakes his head.

‘Bastien I am quite sure. She needs to be gone. She can’t compete to be Queen. She’s not the right fit for Cordonia. She’s not a noble, she’s a mere commoner. Your dossier on her was...enlightening, it’s clear where she gets her stamina and veracity from, however it also made it clear that she was born beneath us, that she’s not fit for our world. As pleasant as she is she’s not good enough for my son or my country.’ He pauses thinking for a moment. His lips turn up at the thought of the pretty American woman ‘Hell, if I was a young prince I would chase after her too for some fun. But even Liam, as soft as he is, can surely see that’s all it can be, that she’s not worthy to wear the crown.’

‘Your Majesty...’ Bastien starts but is cut off.

‘And while you’re at it get rid of that damn Nevrakis woman too, she’s far too feisty and hot headed to be Queen. What with her family’s past I wouldn’t want him choosing her as some kind of consolation prize.’

‘Your Majesty, please I don’t think...’

‘I don’t pay you to think Bastien, I pay you to do. You have my orders. I don’t care how you do it I just want it done. Some kind of scandal should do the job, get it out all over the press, make sure she’s humiliated enough to leave immediately afterwards. Do you understand?’

‘Yes sir, but there has to be another way, please Sir, talk to The Prince...’

‘Bastien’ the King raises his voice an octave ‘Do not overstep the mark.’ Bastien closes his mouth and nods silently. He makes for the door.

‘And Bastien, not a word of this to anyone.’

Bastien places his barely touched drink on the antique sideboard. ‘Very well Your Majesty.’ He bows and leave the room.

Fuck, fuck, fuck. His mind is whirling, how the hell is he going to do this, Liam is never going to forgive him. He’s seen how much the young prince cares for Lady Riley. She’s done so well in her time here, even Bastien can now see what it is they all love about her, she’s got them all captured with her majestic beauty, her uncompromising strength, quick wit and dazzling personality. Even the stone cold Drake Walker has totally fallen for her, much to Bastien’s chagrin. That boy is gonna get his heart well and truly broken going after his best friends girl. Ever since Jackson Walker died in the line of duty Bastien has looked out for Drake and Savannah. Drake’s not going to forgive him for this either. He has no choice, he can’t go against the direct orders of The King.

Regretfully Bastien sets up a trap for Riley. He gets that idiot Tariq to try his luck with her, knowing that the fool couldn’t resist the thought of getting one up on The Crown Prince by getting his end away with the favourite suitor. It was easier than he thought it would be. The only thing he didn’t count on was that Drake would go piling in to save her. Still, they got the photos they needed. He sent them to the press anonymously. Constantine had orchestrated it so that it would happen at the Coronation Ball for maximum impact, Bastien was not in agreement to that, the public humiliation was a step too far in his opinion. But The King was ruthless and Bastien had no choice but to go along with it.

[the-outcast-in-the-back]

Perfectionist ( Brian May x Reader)

A/N: So I decided to write this little College Brian May fic because I had a very similar experience to this and also when I get back from Winter Break I have finals. So for anyone in the same perfectionist boat here is this.

Summary: The reader is really stressed out with one of her professors that doesn’t really do their job right. This leads to her wanting her paper to be perfect so that she can attempt to make a good grade on her final. Brian finds her frustrated and decides that she won’t take help willingly, so he comes up with a plan.

Warnings: Stress, swearing, mentions of testing anxiety, perfectionism, and Fluff!

~

You let out another groan of annoyance. You had been trying to write this paper for hours, but for some reason you couldn’t. Your english professor had given you a paper to write about Shakespeare’s work. It wasn’t anything too difficult, just some analysis work. But the part that annoyed you the most was that she never really read the papers. For some people that was okay with them, but for you it was the most annoying thing in the world. You’re a perfectionist, you always had been.

You thought that teachers would actually care and want there jobs once you were in college but here you are again with people who probably didn’t really want to be teachers. The worst part was that you loved Shakespeare and understood it fine, but there was nothing useful you got on your rough draft. You found many mistakes that were marked by the professor that you had gotten right originally. There was also a peer edit session and no offense to your class, but you didn’t trust a single one of them to look at your paper. A girl the other week asked what alliteration was. How they made it this far in life you had not idea. You wanted to earn your grade, but it’s hard to do that when no one cares. To add to your stress finals were approaching fast and this was a unit that would appear on the final.

So you just sat in your dorm reading and re-reading everything completely lost wondering what you should and shouldn’t do. You were snapped back into reality when you heard a knock at your door. When you got up to open it you saw that it was Brian and you calmed down a bit. Finally someone who doesn’t get on your nerves. “ Hey (Y/N), I was wondering if you would want to come see us perform next week? “Smile” just got a slot at this new bar and I thought you’d like to come.” He asked sweetly.

He then noticed the large pile of papers and eraser shavings that were scattered over your desk. “ Tough class?” He asked. “ Kind of. It’s really complicated and a long, long story...” He tilted his head to the side causing a lot of movement from his curls. “ I’m sorry, yes I would love to see you guys perform next week. Also would you like to come in Brian?” You asked shaking yourself out of the stressful thoughts that currently were going through your head.

You gestured for him to come in and he sat down in one of your extra chairs. “ Where’s your flat mate?” He asked looking around the dorm noticing a very studious mess of your side and a clean untouched side of your flat mates. “ No idea. She’s a partier, sucks for her better for me. “ you explained. He smiled and laughed at your bluntness. “ So are you going to tell me this long story or what?” You explained all of your frustrations about the class to him. He sat there and listened something that was greatly appreciated. “ At this point I want to say just fuck it! I’m a biochemistry major! I can’t do it! I can memorize the periodic table and most compounds in the world, but write a barley edited paper? Nope!” He then scooted his chair closer and took your paper.

“Bri, what are doing?” You asked a little worried about how quiet he was. “ Reading your paper, Miss Periodical.” He replied jokingly. The two of you had an odd relationship. Both of you would sarcastically tease and joke around with each other. It was mostly innocent which was great for both of you but it did at times get borderline flirty. Brian was always sweet about it and usually apologized afterwards, but it didn’t ever truly bother either of you.You both just sat there in silence for a very long time, you didn’t know if that was a good thing or a bad thing.

When he put your paper down he went over to your dresser asking “ When is this due?” Confused you replied “ In 2 days”. He started rummaging around the drawers which caused you to say “ You find anything interesting?” He then pulled out your pajamas and said “ Catch!” You caught the flying clothing and asked “ What the hell?” He only smiled and explained as he headed towards the door “ It’s late. You need to take a break. Get some sleep, actual sleep which means no reading.” He teased as you sarcastically scoffed.

“ Your going to need it, because tomorrow you and I are going to knock this out and get it done. How about eight o’clock in the morning?” You giggled a little and asked sarcastically “ Brian May, are you actually asking me out on a date?” As he left all he said was “ Maybe.” And closed the door. You were taken back and stood there eyes wide. There wasn’t that cute little Brian apology that usually followed. Which actually kinda scared you a little.

It was almost eight o’clock and you sat at your desk trying to organize it the best you could. You were already dressed and had makeup on, surprisingly you actually were able to get up and dressed. Usually you were the type of person who did not and could not get up really early. Finally as your watch went to eight you heard a knock on your door. Punctual like usual you say Brian in your door way holding a try of coffee in one hand and some bags in the other. “ Morning (Y/N), I’m impressed your actually up and completely looking like yourself this early.” You let him in saying “ Well, my finals, grades, and dignity hang in the balance so...” you trailed off and shrugged. Once he set his stuff down he held a coffee cup out to you saying “ Coffee, two for you, two for me and breakfast take away.” You giggles at his kind gesture “ Your a god Bri!” You said taking the coffee and a seat at your desk.

Brian then scooted his chair close to you so you were sitting side by side “ So when I was reading your paper last night-“ you interjected with “ Is it bad?” You were nervous you really don’t like other people reading unfinished work. “ No, not at all. There are just a few spelling and grammatical errors. Maybe you could reword a few things, but other than that it was really good.” He explained with a smile. He then continued with “ If anything we need to correct your professor. She really doesn’t know what she was reading. Did you see she said to capitalize a word that was already capitalized?” You laughed and exclaimed “ YES!” He then got out your food and then was ready to help you work.

“ Thank you.” You said as you started. He looked at you confused “ For what?” You took a deep breath and said “ Thank you for helping me with this. I don’t usually do my school work with other people. I usually dread it, and if I do share it it’s because I know it’s done and I know it’s exactly what the professor wants. I don’t like struggling, I don’t like showing people that from time to time I struggle.” You circled your finger around the rim of the cup embarrassed by what you were saying. Growing up you always did what everyone wanted exactly how they wanted it.

Brian then laid his hand on your forearm and rubbed his thumb slowly across it. “ (Y/N), (Y/N) look at me. It’s okay to need a little help and it’s okay to struggle. Do want to know something odd? I struggle with things too. Everyone does, it’s just easier for others to show it than it is for us. We’re perfectionist, you probably more so than I but that’s not bad. Being a perfectionist means that you have more determination to get things done and done right. You’re lucky because of it.” You smiled and teared up a bit at what he was saying. What did you do to get someone as smart and sweet as Brian? You both stared at each other for a while, but Brian spoke up after feeling like he was staring to long. He cleared his throat and said “ Alright let’s start with the introduction shall we?”

It was almost noon when the two of you finished your paper. It was in both of your opinions perfect and ready for when you needed to turn it in for class. Once you realized you finished you yell “ YES! It’s finally finished! Thank you so much Bri!” You then hugged each other and he replied “ No problem. “ As you hugged you realized things about Brian you never did before. How warm his body was, how comfortable it was to be wrapped in his arms, how good he smelt, things like that. When you two left the warm embrace you looked at your watched and noticed it was almost time for me to go to work. Brian looked at his watch as well and said “ Well, I have practice in a few minutes and you have work. We should both be going.” He grabbed his things to leave, but this weird thought in the back of your mind demanded you to ask “ Brian, can I ask you something?”

He turned around and gave you a nod indicating that you could. “ Last night during our usual banter, I asked you if this was a date and you answered maybe. Usually when we say flirty stuff like that one of us apologizes immediately, but you didn’t and just left. Why was that?” You felt awkward asking and he seemed uncomfortable and unsure how to answer. “ Tell you what, you turn in that paper and come see us perform. When you do you can come back stage and I’ll tell you why, deal?” You rolled your eyes and asked “ You’re going to make me wait that long?” He laughed and said “ Good things come to those who wait.” And then he left.

Today could not have gone any better you got an A on your paper and you knew that it was the real grade you earned, and “Smile” did an amazing job with this new location and crowd. You went back stage and immediately say Brian, his curly long hair is kinda hard to miss.

“ Brian!” You called out and you hurried over to him. “ I got an A on my paper! And now I’m confident that I’ll get an A on my final and you know me I’m not really confident about anything! So we did it!” You said excitedly. He then picked you up which was surprising. You never would’ve guessed he was really strong.

“ That’s amazing!” You guys turned in a circle before he put you down. “ I knew you could do it my little perfectionist!” Before you could do or say anything else he kissed you quickly. You were shocked and noticing this he said “ That’s your answer for the other night. I love you.” A small smile appeared on your lips, this was amazing that one of your best friends loved you and you loved him back. After the silence he was afraid he said something wrong and he started blushing. “ I’m sorry (Y/N) if I offended you but...” you then stopped him by saying “ You didn’t, I love you too.” He then asked “ You sure?” Then you decided to go back to teasing. “ Hmm, well come here.” You then both kissed again and you ran your hands through his soft, plush curly hair. He placed his hands on your back and drew you close. When you stopped and pressed your foreheads together you said “ Oh I’m sure.” The two of you laughed a little he then let out a happy sigh “ You’re perfect, without trying.”

[fanficcritiques]

‘My Inner Life’ - Fanfic Commentary Part 1

Sometime in the late 90′s, early 00′s, the internet was graced with a Legend of Zelda fanfic that would become the stuff of infamous legend. A fanfic largely serving the purpose of the author’s wish fulfillment indulgence, its reputation of having contained things like “tiger sex” and a possible watersports kink continue to precede it even to this day, some 20-odd years later. 

As with a lot of online fan media and history, this story has long captured my attention and imagination. It’s difficult to say why exactly, as I don’t believe there is anything in this story that makes it especially unique in today’s landscape of fics, nor is there anything I find especially outrageous (at least by modern day standards). I suspect it’s due to the fact that said fic actually has a lot of potential and, therefore, becomes a draw for inspiration in its own way. 

Recently I chose to revisit this fic, somewhat in the spirit of ‘MSTing’ (a sort of commentary style that endeavors to be mocking in the spirit of humor). However, I wanted to approach this commentary with a more balanced view, no derisiveness, and overall, as if I was leaving editor’s notes for how the story might be improved. I believe we’ve moved past the era of making fun of fan works and insulting their creators, and for good reason, but I don’t think that means we can’t continue to study and comment on them. 

Before I continue on with the commentary I wanted to make it clear that this story has a special place in my heart, that I have endeavored to show both respect and consideration for the work itself and the author behind it in the notes I’ve made along the way. I realize there are elements of the ridiculous about this fic, but my goal is to show respect in my constructive criticism and I would appreciate that anyone who comments along does the same.  

I want to also add that I haven’t focused too much on spelling, grammar, or general construction errors this time around. This commentary focuses more on the plot, characterization, dialogue, things of that nature. 

So, without further ado...My Inner Life Part 1, prologue and author’s notes. My commentary is in italics and parentheses.  

Author’s notes: Hello. Thanks for choosing to read my story. As you might know I have become a major Zelda fan in the last year. Ever since I played OoT I have grown a fond interest in Link. I started to notice that after I got really into it, I found that I have a strange gift. A gift to Lucid Dream. I started having dreams about Hyrule, and about Link. In a Lucid Dream you can control your dreams. The dreams became very real, kinda like a second life, and almost every night I would have another. Starting from where the last left off. Even to this day I still have them. I find that they help me get through life. I know this may sound queer, but for me the dreams sure help me out. I have shared this story with many other people and so far all has liked it. Now as you read this it is told from my perspective or first person view.

(Some people choose to criticize LinksQueen for not understanding what lucid dreaming is, but given my own research, I think she’s actually right; lucid dreaming is, simply, an awareness while dreaming that one is, in fact, dreaming, and may be able to gain some control over the events that take place. It’s entirely possible she could return to her subconscious every night and make up this story as she went along. However, my theory has always been that some measure of self awareness dictated she needed to have a scapegoat of sorts to explain away the weirdness of what happens in this story. With the blame of a ‘dream’ -albeit one she can control- being to blame for what goes on here, responsibility falls from her shoulders. No, it doesn’t particularly make sense, but I feel that’s probably where she was coming from)

You will find that it is very detailed since I remember it all very clearly to this day. The story takes place after OoT. Nothing after that ever happens. No Majora's Mask. No LttP, or even Oracle of Ages and Seasons. And there is no love relation between Link and Zelda, Link and Ruto, Link and Malon or Link and Saria. Because of my feelings about Link, the person that he gets involved with in this story is myself or actually is my persona. A persona is for those of you who need to know, a representation of ones personality, or in dictionary terms is, (Persona) n. In biology, same as person. So for all you future readers, this story is based on Jenna, a char that is a representation of my personality.

(Again, she’s gotten a lot of flack over the years for this note of choosing to ignore Link’s possible chemistry with the flanking female characters, but I don’t think this is worth criticizing her for. It’s her fanfic, she has the right to disregard, rewrite what she pleases. Why else does fanfic exist if not for that purpose? I also don’t think it’s worth coming after her for writing herself a self-insert, wish fulfillment fantasy character to live vicariously through. Fanfic exists for a reason. It’s more...how this placeholder is written that deserves some amount of further inspection, but we’ll get to that in a moment) 

But if you think this might be too queer then you shouldn't read this. THIS IS NOT THE TYPE OF STORY FOR THOSE OF YOU THAT DISLIKE, OR CANNOT HANDLE SUCH MATERAL AS THE CONTEXT OF THIS STORY. But if you seriously believe you can handle the content of this story, then read on. If your squeamish about sex, then you should not read this, since this story is a REAL LEMON and there is a lot of that, heavily detailed. (Between Link and I that is) Especially during the bonding ceremony. There is also some blood content and strong adult language. So if that’s too much then you should turn back now.

(Responsible and thoughtful of her to put warnings, though I do believe she should’ve also warned for the slight watersports kink that happens in said Bonding Ceremony. It might have saved her some trouble along the road, anyway, as it wouldn’t have come as an interesting surprise to the reader in later chapters. Maybe she didn’t want to spoil it? But anyway, I’m putting one now; urine drinking happens- and no, I’m not being intentionally judgmental about it, I know there are real, consenting adults out there who enjoy that sort of play and as long as one is being safe I don’t think it deserves any ridiculing, but it IS the sort of thing that I would consider ‘not everyone’s cup of tea’ and worth warning about in advance)  

Now I have not finished it as of yet. I have to catch up, since the last dream I had was just after Link and I had the blessing ceremony for our twins.(Our 3rd and 4th kids) Right now there is about 100-150 pgs worth. I'm expecting it to reach at least 300-350 probably even more. I will try to up date as often as possible. I hope that some of you like this. I do not mind sharing it. But please understand that this is very PRECIOUS to me, as well as Link. So like I said, if the content of this story sounds, too queer to you, TURN BACK NOW! But to all who wish to continue, happy reading. Thanks,

~*~ Link’s Queen ~*~

Rated R for strong adult language, sex, violence and blood content.

AGAIN AS A FINAL WARNING: THIS STORY CONTAINS HEAVY SEX, ABULT LANGUAGE AND TALKS ABOUT MY PERSONAL ENCOUNTER WITH LINK. THIS STORY IS BASED ON DREAMS, DREAMS ABOUT MY LIFE WITH HIM. IF YOU FIND THE CONTENT OF THIS STORY TO BE OFFENSEVE, QUEER, OR PLAIN OUT OFF THE WALL, THEN DO NOT READ ON!!!!!!! I HAVE GOTTEN WAY TO MANY FLAMES ABOUT THE CONTENT OF THIS STORY WHEN I HAVE PLACED SEVERAL WARNINGS!!!! I WILL NOT ACCECPT ANY MORE FLAMES, RAMBLINGS, CUSSING OR EXCESSIVE LASHING OUT ABOUT THE CHAR JENNA, OR REVIEWS ABOUT THE CONTENT OF THIS STORY, EXCESSIVE LASHING OUT, VICIOUS ATTACKS AGAINST MY PERSONALITY, OR NON-MATURE CONSTRUCTIVE CRITISIM!!! ANY REVIEWS SUBMITTED THAT DO NOT FOLLOW THE ABOUVE GUIDLINES, WILL BE DELETED IMMEDIATELY! THESE WARNINGS ARE NOT THERE TO LOOK PRETTY, THE AUTHORS PLACE WARNINGS FOR A REASON!!! IT IS TO TELL YOU WHAT THE CONTENT OF THE STORY IS SO THAT IF THE READER FINDS THE CONTENT OF THE STORY OFFENSIVE, THEY WILL NOT READ ON!!! MANY AUTHORS HAVE BEEN COMPLAINING ABOUT UNWANTED, EXCESSIVE, VIOLENT AND JUST PLAIN NASTY REVIEWS THAT HAVE BEEN SUBMITTED BY READERS ABOUT THEIR STORIES, CAUSING FANFICTION TO GRANT AUTHORS THE ABILITY TO DELETE UNWANTED REVIEWS AND BLOCK CERTAIN READERS!! I WILL SAY THIS FOR MYSELF AND FOR ALL AUTHORS ON FANFICTION. NO AUTHOR TWISTS YOUR ARM OR HOLDS YOU AT GUN POINT OR FORCES YOU IN ANY WAY SHAPE OR FORM TO READ THEIR STORIES!! ALL READERS HAVE THE RIGHT NOT TO READ A CERTAIN STORY!!! IT IS YOUR RESOPONSIBILITY TO READ THE WARNINGS AND DECIDE FOR YOUSELF IF THE CONTENT OF THE STORY IS OFFENSIVE TO YOU, AND TO MAKE THE CHOICE TO READ ON OR NOT!!! AND IT ALSO IS THE READERS RESPONSIBILITY TO TAKE RESPONSIBILITY ON HOW THEY HANDLE THENSELVES WHEN LEAVING A REVIEW FOR AN AUTHOR!! LEAVING A REVIEW THAT IS VIOLENT IN NATURE ONLY MAKES YOU THE READER LOOK BAD, AND IS VERY IMMATURE. IF  ALL US HERE ARE SUPPOSED TO BE ADULTS, WELL THEN, LETS CONDUCTIVE OURSELVES LIKE ADULTS AND NOT LIKE LITTLE KIDS! I ONLY EXPECT THE VIOLENT LASHING OUT AND VICIOUS ATTACKS TO COME FROM TEENANGERS, NOT ADULTS! IF YOU PEOPLE REALLY ARE ADULTS THAT ARE CONDUCTING YOURSELVES IN THE MANORS I DECRIBED ABOVE, YOU PEOPLE REALLY ARE SCARING ME!

IT’S A DAMN SHAME TO KNOW THAT THERE ARE ADULTS OUT THERE WHO CANNOT CONDUCTIVE THEMSELVES IN THE SIMPLEST MANORS THEIR PARENTS HAVE TAUGHT THEM! ALSO LEAVING MALICIOUS REVIEWS IS ALSO A SIGN OF LOW SELF-ESTEEM. IF ALL YOU PEOPLE KNOW HOW DO IS ATTACK SOMEONE VICIOUSLY, IT’S A SIGN OF SELFISHNESS AND NO RESPECT FOR ONES-SELF! I SUGGEST TO ALL READERS WHO ARE THINKING ABOUT LEAVING A MALICIOUS REVIEW FOR ME, PLEASE GET A HOBBY AND LEARN TO CONTROL YOUR ANGER, BECAUSE YOUR ONLY HURTING YOURSELF, NOT ME! ALSO LEAVING A NASTY REVIEW ONLY MAKES YOU LOOK STUPID, NOT ME!

I FIND IT VERY RIDICULOUS THAT I HAD TO LEAVE A WARNING THIS LONG, BUT IT IS BECAUSE OF THE VERY IMMATURE READERS THAT HAVE SUBMITTED NASTY CHILDISH REVIEWS!

AGAIN, PLEASE READ THE ABOVE CONTEXT BEFORE READING ON!!!!

(It’s at this point that Link’s Queen obviously reached the end of her patience with scathing reviews and felt her only line of defense was putting yet another note about the content of the story, albeit a rather didactic one...entirely in caps lock. But I get it, I do, and I think she does have a good point in that the plot and themes of the story are made clear from the outset -apart from the watersports, mind, but I already addressed that- and that there is nothing about this particular fanfic that warrants cruelty in the comments. Of course, this was published during a less conscientious time for the internet, a time when I also was in the infancy of my writing and received reviews of similar ilk lmao. It still doesn’t make it okay, nor does it make any of the threats or insults that came after okay either, but that’s kind of why I’m writing this commentary now)  

Furthermore, I have realized that this story needs some heavy grammar corrections, and that the plot needs some work. Also under the advisement of my friend who had just recently completed two literature classes, has stated the reasons why people had classified Jenna as a “Mary Sue” char and labeled her as “flat”. She has come to the conclusion that most people do not know or understand Jenna’s history, so she has advised me to create an origin story to explain about her history before she met Link. That way she will become more rounded and give people a reason to care about her. It was never in my intentions to create Jenna as a “Mary Sue” char or to make her conceited, because I’m not really like that. Jenna is a persona char, one that resembles my personality while this story is being told from her perspective. This story is not something that I pulled out of my head like my drawings, it came from my dreams. So I understand that revising this story is going to be hard work and will take time. Since this story is being told in the exact, or close to exact order it happened in the dreams, changing how fast Link and Jenna marry isn’t going to be easy. Even changing how fast they have sex and revising the Lemon parts also won’t be so easy to do. But I’m currently in the process of revising this story, also I have received a college grammar book from my friend and I will be investing in a Beta-Reader. I’m also considering taking to literature classes at JC to help boost my writing skills. But now I say this, if you people, the reviewers really have the intentions to help me, them please do it positively and like a mature adult. I’m telling you that it is a proven fact that negative motivation NEVER motivates someone to change. It never has and it never will. I’m pretty sure your parents have taught you that people only respond to positive motivation and not negative.

(We’ll start with the beginning of this paragraph. I don’t think the issue with Jenna, as a character, was ever that she was conceited. In fact, she might have been more well-rounded and interesting if she had been conceited; moreover, I think the weakness in her as an OC is that she doesn’t really have much of a personality to speak of at all. Jenna is defined by her relationship with Link, some attributes that are thrown out as afterthoughts within the dialogue and have no real bearing on the plot (at some point she is characterized as “spiritual” though we are never given any evidence, before or after, that correlates to her being a particularly spiritual person at all). She is a traveling merchant when the story begins, though that fails to carry over anything worth noting. She’s an orphan and has been without her parents for a good bit of her childhood- again, this fails to provide any character attributes, issues or consequences at all, much less anything that affects the story in any real way apart from giving her some sympathy from the King and leading him to more or less adopt her, at least when she’s in Hyrule. A backstory means very little if it has no effect on the development of the plot or character.

She also mentions the dreams here again, cementing my aforementioned theory in the line “this story is not something that I pulled out of my head like my drawings, it came from my dreams” as dreams, here, are being used as an excuse for why the story is the way it is and why it cannot, apparently, be easily changed. But again, I would assert that the main issue is not really in how fast Link and Jenna have sex and get married, but rather in the lack of character Jenna has, the lack of insight given to the reader about why Link and Jenna like each other, why that lead to them falling in love. I understand that this story is wish fulfillment first and foremost and in such a fantasy story it’s a given that the placeholder character will win the heart of their affections, but not providing any real relationship growth or insight can leave readers feeling out in the cold, so to speak. We don’t know Jenna as a character, we don’t know why she and Link should fall in love so completely. We need to see it. 

But anyway, good on her at the time for wanting to better herself with further education, I hope she was able to achieve that.) 

I’m not close-minded, I NEVER have been. I have always been open to other people’s thoughts and opinions, its when its done in an inappropriate manner that I turn my nose at it and look away. People have to understand that when you’re an adult, you need to conduct yourself like one and learn how to address other people like one. You cannot just act childish when you come across something that you DO NOT approve of, you’re only making yourself look bad and that can affect you later on in life. Acting childish and ranting and raving is something I’d expect a little kid would do when he doesn’t get his way. When an adult acts childish over stupid things, that’s looked down upon, and considered to be unhealthy. I have seen far too many reviews left for me where the reviewers are just ranting and raving like little kids over this story because they do not like it. It is only making them look stupid and is very unhealthy. I fear that these people have some serious emotional problems if they get that upset over a story. People in control of their emotions and have also obtained some sort of common sense, NEVER let little things get them all riled up. It is very sad when one that is supposed to be an adult, cannot handle them like one. I was NEVER angry with the reviewers not liking the story, it’s how they handled themselves when leaving me the reviews. Getting riled up, ranting and raving, screaming and spitting nails over this story is what has caused me to get upset, not the fact that they didn’t like it.

Also as a side note, I NEVER physically hurt ANYONE with this story. I got one reviewer that said. “Oh God please stop writing, your hurting everyone.” Now I want to know where I physically touched that person. I want to know how I’m twisting anyone’s arms to read this. I have never done anything of the sort in any way, shape or form and I DO NOT appreciate being accused of that! If you’re emotionally hurt over this, its your fault not mine. I’m sorry if it did, but I have placed several warnings describing the content of this story and if you know what it contains and you do not like this type of material, then why are you reading it? I do not appreciate getting accused for other people’s actions. It is your choice as the reader to read the content of this story and it is not my fault if it upsets you when you knew from the gecko what it contained. So please DO NOT flame me about it.

I also feel like a schoolteacher teaching a bunch of little kids. And I find that this really wasn’t necessary and shouldn’t have had to come to this, but it is very hard when your reviewers have forgotten how to conduct themselves like adults.

If you honestly think that being malicious is a good thing and that you’re not wrong in doing so, well then your blinded by your own selfish pride. People with common sense learn how to take responsibility for themselves and are able to admit when their wrong. I have found that many of the reviewers that have left me malicious reviews honestly believe that its appropriate behavior for an adult. When it really is that they are too self-absorbed in themselves to admit their wrong. Again that results from selfish pride. One to scared to admit in front of others that they just might be wrong. Also, how can any of you hold any right to call Jenna conceited when in reality, your contradicting yourself by being conceited as well? Being conceited is again selfish pride and being self-absorbed. And yes, it is and always will be a fact that most of the reviewers have been conceited and very contradictive. Please DO NOT leave me a review that only contradicts what you are trying to preach. You should in reality, take your own advice.

Again I find it very ridiculous that this had to be as long as it is, but it is due to the fact that people not conducting themselves appropriately. Also if I do receive any more malicious reviews, with screaming, spitting nails or ranting and raving over this story because you do not like it then are to self-absorbed to admit that acting like that is wrong, well then you have proven my point! All of this is very self-explanatory!

 Now PLEASE DO NOT READ ON if you DO NOT plan on leaving me a review appropriately!

(She more or less repeats points she already made here, but again, I agree. The summary and numerous warnings should have clued people in to the fact that this was going to be a fantasy, wish fulfillment, placeholder type story and to expect the kind of thing that goes on therein. It also shouldn’t have given anyone free reign to be cruel or leave threatening reviews, etc)

Prologue

    Dreams come in many forms. Some good, some bad, some very realistic, even ones that feels very real. A dream may come to us from happy events, or even stem from bad events in our lives. Some come to us as a pleasure dream and some come as nightmares. Some become vague memories after time, while some stay very rich in our minds. This is a story about a dream that I had. A dream that became more dreams. A dream that would end one night then resumes the next. It became like a second life. Ever since I became a Zelda fan, I grew an interest in Link. I thought of him as the perfect man. One that you could not find of this world. I thought of him as a man that should have been. The more that he attracted my attention the more I became more attracted to him.  I felt like there was a connection between him and me. Then he became a part of me, and after that I fell deeply in love with him.

     I know that may sound queer to you but love is a mysterious thing and should not be taken lightly. Love is a very strong emotion, an emotion that should be treasured. Love comes from the heart, but when it takes hold, it’s got you. I quite don't understand it myself, but I do know that when I first laid my eyes upon Link I fell in love with him. My heart just told me it was right. Told me he was the one, the one I had been searching for. Ever since then I have felt that it was destiny that has brought me to him. Even in my mind it feels the same. I don't consider myself any different from anyone else. Though I have love for someone that is not really there, he will always remain very real to me inside my heart and in my mind. Even to this day I still love him. He has kept me very happy. He has made me happy when I was sad. He has made me feel stronger about myself. He has even taken care of me in ways that no one else can. Even though I have feelings for him, I'm not any different from the rest of you. I will always hold him close to me in my heart. He is still on my mind and I still have dreams. The connection stills remains strong, and the dreams very real.

     I lived an entire life with Link in Hyrule. All stemming from a series of dreams. Dreams that I want to have. Dreams that I make happen. From the first day I met him, to the birth of our first child, to even the days when Link and I prepared our family in the event that Gannon should return. This book is based on my inner life. A second life lived in a far away land in another time line in another dimension. A tale of love, passion, despair and hope. I enjoyed my inner life. I looked forward to going to sleep to it every night. And I look forward to ones that will come, because LOVE WILL NEVER DIE.

(Again, this is one of the points of the story that the writer gets a lot of flack for, but I think it’s pretty harmless to project on a fictional character and use their likeness to fill a sense of loneliness. Nothing wrong with it, and I’m not here to judge. I think we all probably did something similar at a point in our lives- I used to privately pretend Legolas was my boyfriend when I was like 10 or 11, so yknow, glass houses!!!) 

[arazialotis]

Back of A Cop Car

Word Count: Around 4500 

Pairing: Dean x Reader

Summary: The reader meets Sam in her last year of high school and is head over heels for his older brother Dean. When they finally get a moment alone, it is short lived and they both end up in more trouble than they signed up for.

I can’t credit for originality on this one. Heavily based on/ inspired by the song Cop Car (Keith Urban/Sam Hunt take your pick) and I apologize if other writers have done the same, but I wanted to share my take on it. And if y’all like it, I may continue it where the reader leaves off, so let me know your thoughts.

Warnings: Language

This is purely for a hobby and my enjoyment. Maybe some of you will enjoy it too. I am by no means a writer so I apologize in advance for any mistakes or grammatical/spelling errors. I appreciate any feedback or suggestions!

Art by the fabulous @atc74 Thank you so much darling for putting this together. You continue to amaze me with all you do!

@misguidedconqueress also deserves a big shout out for always double checking stories before posting! Thanks so much hun!!!!

You has just turned 18 when the Winchesters first came to town. Sam and you had an instant connection in your AP American Literature class. He was so shy, it was completely adorable. You invited him to a study group at the library after class. Of course, you forgot to mention the group only consisted of you. Regardless, you hit it off right away. Studying everyday after school for weeks. In hindsight, you realized his subtle hints of not being around for long.

With Sam, conversation was so easy. You could talk about anything; politics, philosophy, theology. You worked on college applications together. You applied for a local university, but Sam sent in applications everywhere. He was initially on the fence for Stanford and Yale, just applying mainly for state colleges, but you encouraged him to do it. After all, there is no harm in trying. And if anyone in this small white-picket fence town could make it, it would surely be him.

Sam’s brother, on the other hand, was not so easy to talk to. He was too old for school but you saw him every day when you and Sam left school together. Dean was his name, and every afternoon he’d be leaning against that classic Chevrolet. You’d part ways with Sam, always looking his brother up and down until he would glance your way. Every day, you’d pull your books in closer, quicken your pace, and pray to God he didn’t realize you were staring. You loved Sam but you were infatuated with Dean. On your walk home, you would feel the engine rumble past as you imagined driving off in it with him.

Sam and you trotted down the steps of the school. Today Dean was wearing his leather jacket. The sun brought out his freckles and you swore you could pick out gold flecks in the jade eyes. You unconsciously licked your lower lip.

“So, I’ll see you tonight?” Sam asked.

“Yeah, my mom usually has dinner ready around 6:30, if you want to come around then.” You confirmed. “Don’t forget your copy of Catcher in the Rye.” You reminded him.

“Homework on a Friday?” Dean scoffed.

“We have a joint report due Monday.” Sam came to your defense.

“All I’m saying, these are the prime years of your life… Live a little.” Dean advised as he looked you up and down. “Isn’t there a party or something happening?”

You looked at Sam and chuckled. “Nerds like us don’t get invited.”

“A girl like you doesn’t need an invitation…” Dean flirted.

“Oh really? In that case I’ll be ready at 10.” You emphasized the sarcasm by rolling your eyes. “See you later Sam.” You began walking off.

“Hey sweetheart.” Dean called after you. “You want a ride?”

You turned around, seeing a mischievous smirk on his face that was driving you wild. “No thanks, I’m just a few blocks down.” You pointed near the direction of your house.

“I wasn’t talking about the car, babe.” He winked.

You instantly turned around and picked up the pace, faster than usual, embarrassed because you couldn’t deny desiring his offer.

Sam shoved Dean on the shoulder. “Fuck off man, leave her alone.”

Dean raised his hands defensively. “Hey, if you want dibs go for it but uh.. She’s definitely into me.” “You don’t know…” Sam looked at him confused.

“You can tell she’s thinking about it right now…” Dean’s gaze wandered to you. “She wants it so badly, considering giving into her darkest urges. She’s not just holding her books, she holding herself. Insecure, never being that open to anyone but the way she swings that ass tells you she may just be confident enough to follow through.”

“You are repulsive.” Sam spat.

“Oh, we have a hair flip.” He called Sam’s attention back to you. “Now the secretive glance back… wait for it…” You completed Dean’s prediction, looking back over your shoulder. “Oh! And finally the tugging at the shirt.” You followed his words again. “She definitely wants it.” He smiled with glee. “Damn, I miss high school.”

“You don’t know her. Trust me you’re not her type.” Sam argued.

“Sam, I know all girls and she’s a dead giveaway.” He smirked before jumping into the Impala.

Sam patted the hood of the car and sighed joining Dean in the car. Just one more year of this, and then he’d be off on his own.

Dean reached over and shook his hand through Sam’s hair trying to lighten the mood. “What’s with the hair Rapunzel?”

---

“So, you got the car tonight?” You greeted Sam at the door.

“Yeah, it was like pulling teeth, but I got it.” He spun the keys in his hand.

“Well, come meet the family… if you dare…” You teased with a wink.

“Hey. Y/N…” He stopped you before entering. “I just want to apologize for my brother…” “Sam, you don’t need to apologize. You are not your brother.” You assured him as you played with your necklace.

“I know. He can just be a real dick sometimes.” He vented.

“Seriously, it’s okay.” You promised. “Come on, dinner’s ready..”

By the time dinner was over, Sam was wrapped around your father’s finger. You were actually surprised he didn’t offer a dowry. The two of you studied in the living room. Your book was filled to the brim with post-its. You compared notes and worked on typing your joint report, occasionally checking Sparknotes to make sure you were on the right path.

Sighing as you laid on the couch, you put the book over your face. “I can’t take anymore of Salinger.” You complained. You flipped over facing Sam. “You want to watch a movie or something?”

Sam set his book down, stretching and looking at his watch. “Shit. I forgot, I have to help my dad out with a project tonight.” He quickly started gathering his things.

“You can’t just help him out tomorrow?” You asked.

“Nah, he needs it first thing in the morning… for his work.” Sam explained.

“Okay.” You understood, but didn’t hide your disappointment.

“Hey, but we’re still on for tomorrow, yeah?” He questioned.

“Yeah, I’ll be there around 3. We can finish this lame project up.”

“Sweet. See ya Y/N.” Sam left in a hurry.

Your father entered the living room. “What’d you do to scare him off so quick?” You rolled your eyes. “Nothing, he just has some family stuff going on tonight.”

“You know, your mother and I were talking… We think he should come around more often.” He suggested.

“We’re just friends, Dad.” You refuted.

“Well, he’s a nice boy.” He stated as you turned to go to your room.

“Wait til you meet his brother.” You muttered under your breath.

An hour or two had gone by as you passed the time listening to music and doing your nails. You immediately stopped singing along the moment you heard tapping on your window. Your heartbeat accelerated and you started taking shallow breaths while wondering if you should go get your parents. After another set of taps, you built up the courage to pull back your curtain only to find that handsome devil with the green eyes.

“You gonna let me in?” He asked, his voice muffled through the glass.

You unfroze, unlocking the window and pushing it up.

“Jesus, I’m glad I guessed the right room. It might have been a whole different conversation.” He commented as you undid the screen.

“Shh.” You scolded as he stumbled in. “What the hell are you doing here Dean?!” You whispered.

“Well, I know I’m a little late, but we had a date for 10 if I recall…” He slyly smirked.

“You can’t be serious.” You called him out.

He raised his eyebrows. “Deadly.”

“So a party then?” You suspiciously asked.

Dean sat down at the edge of your bed. “For two.”

“We can’t stay here…” You warned.

“I’m still new to town, got any ideas?” He questioned.

“A couple…” You thought. “Let me get changed first.” You started looking through your closet. “Do you mind?”

Surprisingly, he respectfully turned around. You sauntered out of pajama bottoms replacing them with jeans and throwing on a white tank top. You quickly glanced in the mirror, smoothing out your hair.

“How old are you again, Y/N?” He asked.

“18.” You confirmed, slightly annoyed behind his hidden reasoning. Turning off the radio and lights, you straddled your window. “Ya coming?”

“Hell yeah.” Dean exclaimed, stunned by your eagerness.

He followed you down the trellis and onto the street. “Where’s your car Winchester?” You teased.

He twirled a set of keys in his hand. “I got stuck with Sam’s beater tonight…”

You scoffed. “Sam does not have a car.”

He opened the passenger’s door to a 1983 Ford Fiesta. “He does, he just doesn’t want anyone to see it…”

You chuckled and hopped in.

“Piece of crap…” Dean muttered as the gears grinded together. He finally was able to get it started. “There we go… So where you taking me?”

You directed him to the old quarry that had since been filled with water. “Pull over here.” You instructed. “We’ll walk the rest of the way.”

Crickets chirped, as you rustled through an informal trail, used by you and other kids. Dean analyzed you, trying to figure you out, believing his preconceived notions had been wrong. A cross around your neck continued to throw him off. The path led to a chain link fence with a clear ‘No trespassing’ sign. You pulled away part of the fence as Dean hesitated.

“Chicken?” You teased him, tongue peeking out. You knew that the property had been abandoned for years, there was no reason to worry.

“Yeah right.” He waved off and followed you through.

You continued to lead the way around the quarry to an old, rusted structure. It overlooked the lake and was the best view of the city. Even though it was only three stories, it managed to capture your little world. Most of the lights in the city were off, aside from the street lights, giving the atmosphere a dullish glow.

“Wow.” Dean whispered when he made it to the top.

“Now’s your one and only chance for a Leo reference.” You giggled.

Dean didn’t hold anything back. “I’m King of the world!” He yelled with outstretched arms.

You hollered along, causing you both to buckle over laughing.

“So, welcome to the party.” You said as you sat down on the ledge.

“Some party.” Dean sat down next to you.

“Well, you’ve only just arrived… we’ve got games.. Truth or dare, would you rather…” You continued when Dean didn’t jump on those. “We have music, dancing if you're lucky.” His eyebrow raised as his intrigue grew. “We’re clean out of food and drinks, we’d have to make a run if you are interested in that. And we have a pool.” You stretched your hand out to the quarry. “Although, I would advise against swimming… It’s haunted.” You warned in a hushed tone.

“Oh really?” Dean asked skeptically.

“Oh yes.” You assured. “Where do I even begin… the drownings… or the miners even before that.”

“That doesn’t make it haunted.” Dean debated.

“It starts with the faint whisper in your ear, the shiver down your spine, to alert your senses of something you can’t see. Then the sound of wet footsteps or perhaps a smell of smoldering metal. That’s your signal to start running.” You improvised.

“No such things as ghosts.” Dean denied, knowing fully well you were just playing with him.

“My friend actually saw an apparition once… said it was reaching out to her, asking her to come join it in the water…” You gritted your teeth and looked around. “Okay, enough, I’m creeping myself out.” You snuggled up closer to Dean as he chuckled.

“So uh, back to party games… you don’t happen to know 7 minutes, do you?” He questioned, swallowing thickly.

“Only 7? We play it much longer around here.” You nipped your lip as your focus darted between his luminescent green eyes and his lips that were growing ever closer.

Both your attention was cut off by the flashing blue and red across the quarry. Dean’s desire had flushed replaced with concern.

“Oh, there’s a road over that way,” You pointed in a general direction. “They’re just making a shortcut.” Except the lights become brighter and another car entered the quarry.

“We gotta go.” Dean stood up.

“There’s no way they can see us up here…” You rationalized. “Beside, we’re young, they’ll let us off with a warning.” You turned around but Dean was already halfway down the ladder.

You sighed but followed suit. Once you reached the bottom, he grabbed your hand and guided you through the brush. You could have sworn he discarded something along the way but the world was going by in a blur, you didn’t get the chance to see what it was.

Your heart was pounding out of your chest and you were struggling to keep your breath. But soon you heard sirens closing in.

“Shit!” Dean yelled, quickly before halting to a stop to avoid crashing into a fence.

He immediately hopped up to realize the top was covered with barbed wire, he could suffer through it but didn’t want to leave you alone. He let go, and grabbed you to crouch down covered by the shrubbery. He placed his fingers to his lips. You nodded your head and tried to hold your breath. Soon, the sirens stopped wailing even though to could still see the lingering blue and red. You eventually heard voices and flashlights started scanning the area. One of Dean’s hands held onto yours as the other rubbed his brow. Sighing out of guilt, you squeezed Dean’s hand reassuringly. He glanced up to find you contagiously smirking, and he couldn’t help but smile back.

You nodded to the police car. “We’re going to get caught either way.” You mouthed.

“Okay.” Dean agreed.

With one pair of hands still interlocked, you slowly started to stand up with your hands raised above your head. Flashlights focused onto you, with police yelling in the distance. One officer, shone his light in your eye. Instinctually you blocked the light with your free hand.

“On the ground, now!” A voice ordered.

You rolled your eyes. “We were just on the ground…” You muttered under your breath.

But both of you cautiously got onto your knees and then laid flat, placing your arms for compliance with cuffs.

“Hey man, easy.” Dean pleaded as they slapped the cuffs on you.

Dean was cuffed as well, a little too tight. They brought both of you over to the hood of the cop cars and patted you down.

“Guys…” You started. “Really? We’re only a couple of kids, you know.. Having a good time…” You tried to imply.

An officer sternly looked at you but remained silence.

“We just wanted to get some space away from my family, so we could be together…” You continued explain.

You met Dean’s eyes across the hood of the car. Damn you wished you had been faster to kiss him. He mimicked your smirk thinking the same thing. Another officer started reciting the Miranda rights.

“Okay, this is fucking ridiculous.” You squirmed in the arms of an officer. “We weren’t doing no harm. Who the fuck owns this anyways? It’s been abandoned for years! Everyone uses it for their hook up spot!” You rambled out excuses. “I wanna talk to Officer Stevens!”

“Don’t worry, you’ll get to talk to him down in county.” Someone assured you as they escorted you into the back of the squad car.

They pushed your head down and shoved you in, as they did the same to Dean. “You gotta light?” You asked with poison in your eyes.

“Shut up.” The officer ordered before slamming the door.

Dean started chuckling as his door was shut too.

“What?” You demanded, anger still fuming.

“There’s no chance in hell you smoke.” He continued giggling.

“... I could.” You responded embarrassed. “Besides if they are going to treat me this way, I might as well give them a little fire back.” You deeply sighed the weight of your consequences finally bearing down.

It hit Dean too. “My dad is going to kill me.”

“I’m so sorry… Seriously, I’ve come out here countless of times, no one ever seemed to care.” You tried to reconcile your guilt.

“It’s not your fault.” Dean assured.

You attempted to break the heaviness. “At least it will make one hell of a story.” You smirked.

“You got that right.” He looked you up and down.

You sighed, closing your eyes and leaning your head on his shoulder. He couldn’t help but grin gazing down at you. Had his hands been free, he would have reached over to tuck the loose strand of hair back behind your ear. The blue and red lights danced off your skin disorienting time and space. You matched Dean’s deep and steady breaths soaking up each feeling of infatuation as just the two of you existed in that moment.

The trance was abruptly ended as an officer forced his way into the driver’s seat. You kept your head against Dean’s shoulder but peaked an eye open to analyze the officer. He was staring directly ahead, refusing to speak yet glancing back occasionally through the rearview mirror, most likely awaiting orders.   

You lifted your head to get a better view. He was young, quite young. Quickly deciding to change tactics, you flipped your hair back, pursued your lips together, and leaned forward giving him an optimal view.

“Say uh… you don’t really need to take us down to the station do you?” You smoothly questioned in a breathless voice. The officer looked back through the rearview mirror and his eyes widened. “Because you know, I’d do almost anything just to be let off with a warning.” Dean pinched his lips together and looked out his window in attempt not to burst out laughing at your overly exaggerated attempt to flirt your way out of the situation.

The officer cleared his throat. “You know, it’s nothing personal sweetheart. I’m just following orders.”

You huffed instantly sulking back into your seat. As the cop pulled out of the quarry, you chewed on your lip infuriated by the situation. It wouldn’t matter anyways. Soon you’d be at the station and be able to talk to Officer Stevens. He was friends with your parents and you often ran into him at school drives and volunteering events. He would be able to speak of your character.

Your thoughts were broke as Dean purposely nudged his knee against yours. He was grinning like a child. You couldn’t help but silently giggle. “What?” You whispered.

He shrugged his shoulders. “Nothing.”

God, you should have taken your chance. You kept thinking over and over.

It wasn’t long before you arrived at the station. Both of you were fingerprinted. You were guided over for mugshots.

“Hey Winchester.” You yelled as he was still getting the inked wiped from his fingers. “Bet’cha can’t do better than this.” You pouted your lips and popped an eyebrow.

The cop rolled her eyes.

Dean was next. “Who do you think invented blue steel, sweetheart?” He asked, immediately going into the pose for his shot.

You couldn’t help but laugh even while being escorted into the one holding cell together.

After silence grew and officers dissipated, you nuzzled closer up against Dean. “So, tell me everything.” You gazed into his eyes with fascination.

He laughed, surely not going to give you the truth. You were still too naive for that. “Where to even start…” He thought.

“At the beginning, I mean, we got all night.” You encouraged.

And he did. Well, leaving out the details about demons and monsters. He told you about life as a kid, when his mom died, what life was like growing up on the road and how much a nuisance Sam could be especially when he was younger. He told you about his hopes and dreams but that he would most likely go into the family business. You sighed, being able to pick out that same tone of resentment you heard from Sam.

“But enough about me, what about you?” He asked.

“I’m going to be a cop.” You teased giggling. Dean lightly chuckled. “I’m serious, tonight has inspired me.” You played with profound conviction. “No, but seriously…” The next person who walked through the door, broke your train of thought. “Oh, thank God.” You whispered and stood up to gain his attention.

“Y/N?” Officer Stevens called from across the room. “What the hell…” He trailed off into a whisper walking closer to the cell. “What in God’s name are you doing in here?” He noticed Dean looking him up and down.

“Listen, we were just at the quarry, minding our own business and not doing any harm… you know everyone goes up there on weekend nights and it’s never been a problem before.” You pleaded your case.

“Jesus Y/N.” He rubbed his forehead. “I should call your father.”

“I’m 18.” You sternly reminded him, slightly panicking not wanting your parents to find out.

“Which means you could be tried as an adult.” He warned. “What’s gotten into you? You should know better.” “Like I said… no one's ever cared about the quarry before.. So what’s going on?” You asked him. Another officer called him over. “Just give me a minute… I’ll be right back.” “So that’s your guy?” Dean clarified.

“Don’t sound so pessimistic… he’ll get us out.” You assured, unconvinced yourself.

A few more minutes passed and Stevens came to unlock the cell. Both of you started to walk out.

“Just you.” He ordered and Dean sat back down on the bench.

He guided you over to his desk in which you sat across from him. “So I shouldn’t be telling you this… Well, first I need your alibi for Wednesday night, around 9:30…”

“I already told your partner during processing…” But he still stared at you blankly. “You’re my alibi… we were both helping clean up at the job fair…”

“Oh, right right right…” He remembered. “You’re not the problem anyways. It’s your friend’s..” “Dean.” You corrected.

“Yes, it’s his story that is not adding up.” Stevens explained.

“Why do you need our aliblis anyways?” You asked.

He sighed. “Like I said, I shouldn’t be telling you this. And you have to promise not to spread this around.” You nodded your head in agreement. “There’s been a string of murders around the tri-county area. We are keeping it out of the media as much as possible, not wanting to cause panic.”

“Like a serial killer?” Your eyes widened.

Stevens nodded concerned about worrying you.

But you loudly scoffed. “And Dean is a suspect? Yeah, right!”

“We can’t confirm his alibi, and his prints were found at one of the scenes.” The officer explained.

“Have you tried his brother Sam?” You asked.

“Sam?” Stevens recognized the name.

“We go to school together. His number should be in my phone, wherever your partner threw that.” You suggested.

“Okay, we’ll check into that but for now you are free to go.” He sipped on a cup of coffee.

“I’ll stay.” You stated, looking back at the cell.

“Y/N…” He warned.

“No, I want to stay with Dean. I got him into this, so I’m going to stick it out until he’s cleared. Call my parents or whatever, but I’m staying.” You demanded.

After a few more minutes of convincing, your stubbornness pushed through and you were escorted back to the cell. For a brief moment you hesitated, swallowing a lump in your throat concerned you may have just locked yourself back up with a murderer. But that was ridiculous, you laughed it off.

Hours continued to pass. Both you and Dean were growing weary. You tried to keep his spirit up by cracking jokes but eventually fell asleep leaned against him. It was dawn when you woke to the sound of the bars opening. Both of you had finally been cleared. On your way to the lobby, you noticed a man with dark hair and a salt and pepper beard. You could see the anger practically radiating off of him.

“Fuck.” Dean muttered under his breath.

It must be his dad, you deduced, even though you had never seen him before. The man turned and walked out the front door as a police officer handed over your confiscated belongings. Both of you made your way to the front door. The Impala was waiting at the curb. Dean’s jaw and fist were clenched.

“Hey Dean,” You rubbed his shoulder trying to soothe him.

He turned towards you and for a second you saw fear in his eyes. You leaned up and pecked him on the lips, attempting to distract him and yourself from your impending fates. He instantly smiled and drew you back in, his arms wrapped around you while deeply pressing his lips against yours. You became lost in his world until a passing officer cleared their throat. You pulled back embarrassed and ashamed, remembering the trouble you had gotten him into.

Dean lifted your chin to meet your eyes. “Hey, I wouldn’t trade last night for the world…. Whatever happens, remember that…” You nodded, thinking the same. “Let’s do this.” He grabbed your hand and lead you out the front doors.

….

Ten years later you sat behind the sheriff’s desk with your newly hired deputy across from you.

“My point is, we all make mistakes, that was one of my biggest, but look where I am now. Yeah, you screwed up, but it’s not the end of the world.” You encouraged.

She looked at you wide eyed. “But what happened afterwards?” “That’s… that’s… I was trying to reassure you that everything was going to work out.” You stated confused.

“Yeah, yeah, I understand and you have been a great support through all of this, but I need to know what happened.” She persisted.

You sighed and took a sip of coffee. “I was grounded for two months and my parents made me participate in community service even though there were never any charges.”

“And Dean??” She demanded.

“I never heard from him again. I texted Sam a bit. But that weekend they left town supposedly due to their dad’s job. I asked Sam to come live with us so he could finish out his senior year in one place but that after that his phone was disconnected.” You tried to explain as emotionlessly as possible but it still stung.

“What about the murders?” She continued.

You smirked, that’s why you hired her in the first place, she had the potential to be a great detective. “Another murder happened the night we were locked up. Eventually that’s what cleared Dean to go free. They stopped after that. Police at the time determined that the killer had committed suicide.”

“Wow, that is crazy.”

“Mmhmm.” You agreed. “The town hasn’t seen anything like it since.”

“Until now.” She corrected.

“Until now…” You repeated, looking at the files of recent murder victims sprawled across your desk. 

-----------

Continue to Part 2

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[nanostuffs]

Quotes 3/12/17 - 3/18/17

Be warned: Only the first quote is undertale fanficiton, and there’s a lot of alien shit in this one.

3/12/17 - True Courage Is Knowing... When To Spare A Life (Undertale Fanfiction)

Frisks favorite book in the whole world (and believe them, there were a lot of books) was The Hobbit. And sure, it was a very violent book, with a surprising amount of death for something considered a children’s novel, but there were some better points to it. Frisk loved that Bilbo learnt new things about himself, and yet at the end of the day was still the slightly fussy, and well put together hobbit he started as. Frisk liked that Bilbo didn’t know how to fight at the start of the journey, and used his wits to keep himself safe. Frisk saw a lot of themselves in Bilbo.

Gandalf said to Bilbo, true courage is about knowing not when to take a life, but when to spare one. Frisk took that to heart, even when they ended up all the way down in the pit of monsters known as The Underground.

3/13/17 - It is Possible to Commit no Mistakes and Still Lose. That is Life.

I’mork watched the dark haired human curse and pull on the yarn she was working with, before reinserting her hook and fiddling with the yarn once again.

“Is it possible to not make a mistake?” the blue blob asked.

“Mistakes are a human thing,” Jane half shrugged, focusing on looping yarn around hook and pulling it though stitches to make more stitches.

“I meant more would it be possible to make a machine that does the same thing you do, and not have to worry about there being errors?” the blob slid in front of the couch where Jane was crocheting, leaving it’s slime trail behind it.

“Perhaps,” Jane replied, “But you realize it’s possible to end up with a bad product even if the designer made absolutely no mistakes, right? That’s just how life is sometimes.”

“Are you trying to be philosophical?” I’mork asked, “I don’t appreciate your attempts to dodge the question.”

“Well, I actually wasn’t,” the brunette shook her head, “But I guess that did sound kind of deeper than I meant it to. To answer your question, probably, but one would still need to know the basics of crochet in order to use it and have a nice result.”

3/14/17 - I’m a Doctor, not A…

“Khrelen, something’s wrong with the human!” I’mork shouted at the giant doctor.

“What’s the matter? Is she bleeding?” Krelen was quick to put their book down and stand.

“She’s crying, but shows no physical reason for it,” I’mork stayed close to the door, knowing better than to trail slime into the medical ward.

“Did she complain about being in pain?” Khrelen reached into a cabnet filled with vials of liquids.

“She said it’s not a physical pain like cramps,” I’mork said, “She said it’s psychological.”

“Well I don’t think there’s anything I can do then,” Khrelen shrugged and returned to her book.

“But you’re a doctor! You have to help!” I’mork cried.

“I’m a doctor, not a psychologist,” Khrelen glared at I’mork, “Now stop wasting my time and make sure the human doesn’t act out.”

“Her name’s Jane,” I’mork’s tentacles began to flail, “She’s 25  human years old. She likes  to read, write, crochet, and watch movies. She plays human video games and has a soft spot for Boxe because he is reminiscent of a furry mammal.”

“So?” Khrelen asked, “These are all facts about her. Another fact is that she is in emotional pain, and I do not know how to treat that. Now go cheer her up or something.”

“Fine!” I’mork left an extra large puddle of slime behind them.

3/15/17 - We Successfully Rescued You. You are Refusing to be Rescued. I Wanna Make That Clear.

“Hey, wait,” Jane dragged her feet as one of the three men dragged her towards the air lock.

“No time for waiting sweetheart,” the guy dragging her said, “If we don’t move quickly your captors are gonna wake up and we really don’t want that.”

“And I don’t think I want to go anywhere with you,” Jane attempted to free her arm from the man’s gasp by punching his hand, be he refused to release her. Thankfully her being dragged along was ended by the leader of the group stopping.

“Let me get this straight, you don’t want to leave?” He asked.

“They might have ‘captured’ me, but I feel safe here,” Jane growled, “Thank you for trying to rescue me, but it’s not needed.”

“We successfully rescued you! You are refusing to be rescued. I wanna make that clear.” The leader glared back at her.

“Well then we’re all clear,” Jane shrugged, “Tell whoever you report to that Jane Crow is happier in the company of aliens than humans.”

Her am was immediately released, and she was pushed away from the group of three. She watched as they escaped the ship through the air lock. She knew she’d have to get back to the room her aliens had kept her locked in, but for now she could watch her last thought of returning to humanity drift away from the ship.

3/16/17 - Maybe you've heard of it: Foodfight! is the worst movie ever made! (The Flop House, Episode 138)

Jane found that she had a soft spot for listening to podcasts while crocheting. It was soothing to listen to two guys make fun of a bad movie while she did her own thing. It reminded her of home, and while it did make her feel more homesick, it also made the pain of not being able to go home dissipate.

3/17/18 - “... They Lost My Luggage, It’s the One Thing I Lost on This Trip!”

“You’ve been doing pretty well,” Thalia watched as her much shorter friend slice a sword through a dummy.

“I should hope so,” Canica stabbed the dummy again, “I placed first in every event here. I placed first in that sprinting session, first in the eating contest, first in the singing contest, and first in the spell casting contest.”

“Is there anything you haven’t won?” Camila asked her teammate.

“The carriage with my luggage got lost on the way up here. They lost my luggage; it’s the one thing I lost on this trip.”

3/18/17 - “Does Anyone Know A Good Plumber?” (Inspired by the Creepy Pasta)

Does anyone know a good plumber? Inspection’s tomorrow and I, like,  have a leaky tub from a fucked up ritual, and like, several dead things scattered around the house, and I think the washer machine is, like, trying to eat me.

It all started a few days ago. I was chatting to this super hot guy on tinder (at least I think it was a guy) and he, like,  asked me if I could like, do a ritual to summon a demon/ghost/demi-god thing. And I was all like, sure I can bby. And then he was like, try to summon a water spirit thing for me and then I’ll come over to your house, exorcise it for you, and then we can fuck. That was, like, his actual message.

I decided that, like,  it sounded like a fantastic idea, so long as he also brought drugs. Cause, ya know, if I’m gonna, like,  do a shitty ritual for sex, there better also be drugs. Also my dealer’s in a holding cell for buying a whore. Like, I know sex is fun and all, but like, how the hell did you not get caught for drugs?

Anyway, he agreed to bring drugs, but like, it’d have to wait a couple of days for him to get the drugs. We decided that like, we should do this on a wednesday, cuase apparently  that’s when drugs from his “hommie” are like, super cheap or something. So I set my alarm to go off at like, midnight on Wednesday so that, like, I could get the ritual done before having to go to work and some fun that night.

My alarm didn’t go off until 1 in the morning because I’m an idiot. So like, I had to do everything super quickly. I didn’t bother getting dressed, and just went into my bathroom, to like, do the ritual. So I went into bathroom, and lit, like five candles and arranged them in a pentagon. I then used some string to like, outline the pentagon and make some, like, super special runes to keep me from summoning something that would, like, actually kill me. I was supposed to do a, like, hour long chant at half-past midnight, but since I was late anyway, I just did a quick little, please come forth deadly water thingie so that I can like, get a good dicking.

It sort of worked? A pipe burst through my bathroom wall. I like, realized at that moment that inspections is supposed to be on Sunday. Fuck. So I packed everything up and got dressed, since I was up anyway, I may as well have like, started early. I found out that all of my business clothes were, like, dirty and shit. So I picked everything up and walked my bra and underwear clad ass to the laundry room to do laundry.

There was this, like, super creepy dude in there though. He was, white, lacked a face, and was super twiggy. He was also in a, like, tux or some shit. He just calmly waved a hand at me. I guess that slut in 4b has a goddamn gentleman as a booty call now. Anyway, I waved back and tried to flirt with the guy. He like, beat a hasty retreat from the room. Actually, now that I think about it, he like, didn’t have a face. Fuckin’ weirdo.

So, like, I started to put my laundry into the washing machine, but like, I thought I heard screaming from inisde the machine. I took a look, but there was nothing in there. So I just put in my load and set the machine to delicate so it wouldn’t rip any of my nice shirts. When I turned around, the pipes seemed to slither across the floor and were starting to take up the room. I booked it for the door and didn’t pass go.

Long story short, I’m locked up in my apartment with a pipe hanging out of the wall and leaking water into the tub. Also there’s some dead things around the apartment, mostly rodents because mouse traps. Does anyone know a good plumber in Maricopa County who won’t ask any questions?

[eveningbat]

Heartbreaker’s “I Wouldn’t Even Bother” Approach

In this blog, I would like to single out the warning signs suggesting that your relationship is not going to last because your partner doesn’t want to make everything happen, and once everything is ruined, he will most likely blame it all on you.

Falling in love has always been unfortunate for me, it is rather a curse than a blessing. This time, it was no exclusion. He found me on the international dating site, I accidentally came across his simple message saying "Hi! What are you looking for?” I replied about 18 days after he had written the original message. “What a nice man”, I thought.

We started communicating and exchanging thoughts, opinions, sharing the stories of the past. Over the weekends, we sometimes had video chats if he wanted to see me (and he wanted it rarely, which is untypical of a person who has deep feelings, please mind this). When we were choosing the time for the video chat, he always stated the time in his country, leaving it for me to calculate what time it would be in mine (convenient for himself only). He was very laid back and easy going, which facilitated our conversations, and there was always something to talk about. After a while, I somehow got so attracted to him, lured by his charm, mesmerizing smile, optimistic views on life, joyful mood and happy vibes that my feelings strengthened and I was becoming more and more enamored. I got really crazy about his cool American accent of the person who is a native speaker of English. OMG, this accent was so fabulous! However, love was painful because he didn’t seem to feel the same for me. He would disappear for long times, then just get in touch again as if nothing happened, and always come late for our video chats. (Lack of punctuality or sheer carelessness?) Those are the warning signs that have to be considered.

According to his words, he had several relationships in the past. He was never married. I was wondering why his previous relationships ended, and the answer was that he didn’t care much about them. The people just got bored with each other and didn’t develop strong connection on the personal level. This should be paid attention to because the mistakes of the past may be mirrored in every new relationship. And it was to be expected.

Later, we faced the family and children question. He said he wanted children, I was hesitant at first, but as our relationship was evolving, I was ready for everything to be with him, and finally agreed. He didn’t appreciate it though. But I was so in love that would accept everything.

In October, about 6 months after we met online, I asked him if he thought we needed to meet in person (I think he should have done this first). He said he wanted to do it by the end of the current year. So we started making arrangements and this was not easy because we were living in different countries far away from each other. As winter was approaching, we chose Mexico as a warm climate country with lots of travel destinations. He booked my airplane tickets, departure and return, at his own cost, and made a spelling error in my first name though I provided the correct spelling for him to use. I selected the list of hotels, but he chose the one that was not on the list, at his own discretion. (Being indifferent to my choices). He made the hotel reservation in his own name without mentioning my name. I told him there would be possible problems because of the above, and he didn’t want to bother. Then I insisted, and he called expedia to make correction, however, the correction was not mentioned as I was checking in later. And he did nothing to ensure my hotel booking. In the airport, they asked for my hotel reservation confirmation, and there was a problem because it was made solely in his name. Luckily, they didn’t mind the name spelling error in the airplane tickets.

He said, the purpose of the trip was to “see if we are compatible for marriage”. What that means, I will tell you later.

So, I flied from Ukraine with one stopover in Germany and he flied from the USA, but before we actually met, I became pretty panic-stricken because we landed in different terminals of the airport, we previously agreed to meet at his terminal, but I could not get there because the shuttle bus between the terminals was rarely available as it became clear at the airport. So I had to take a taxi to the hotel. It was very expensive, and took me a long time because of the traffic jams.

He was not yet in the hotel, and I had to wait for him because the reservation, as mentioned above, was made in his name only. But as I asked at the front desk if he checked in, I heard a familiar voice behind saying “Hi”, looked back and finally calmed down as I saw his warm smile. “My savior”, I thought. He took my things to the room. But the disaster was only beginning.

We (there is no more such thing as “we”, but it can’t be expressed in other words) had intimacy without penetration, mostly hugs and kisses, it was nice, but believe me, the most attractive and sexy part of his was… the American accent as he was speaking English. Well, this is just my perception.

Some time later, we decided to take a trip to the local sights to see the famous Mexican pyramids and some other places. In the hotel lobby, there was a charming Mexican woman who was telling us a lot about the sights and the prices, smiling nicely and looking into his eyes. He was smiling back, flirting and asking her a lot of questions till the trip reservation was made and the documents had to be filled out. He suddenly told her that we (he and I) were not married, though she didn’t even ask. I was upset. In an hour, at the hotel pool, he made a nasty comment about my legs, I got offended and ran away to the room to burst into tears. He calmed me down with words of encouragement and hugs. He said I was too sensitive.

The trip to the pyramids was exciting and Mexico is an amazing country in general, and so beautiful. Except, I forgot to mentioned that he lost the ticket just before the trip, so it was renewed using the ID. Our days were running fast though he didn’t pay much attention to me, he was reading his ebook all the time without even noticing me, except when he wanted some cuddles or embraces from me. It was my pleasure to hug him, cuddle to him, embrace him tenderly, massage his neck, head, even feet at times, do all to satisfy him. He liked it but this did nothing to spark his feelings for me because there were no feelings.

Our time together was coming to an end, and that made me sad, I embraced him and said I didn’t know what I would do without him. He just laughed. I started crying because the feeling of losing him was unbearable. He didn’t get it. I asked him if he was planning or expecting any continuation of our relationship upon arrival home, and the answer was, “I do not have a road map plan”. He didn’t say anything about the result of that “verification for compatibility”, so it was easy to guess that I was not suitable. And it was the time to leave for home, we parted at his terminal and I took a bus to mine. Before leaving, he said we would still meet. However, it was not true.

My trip home was very stressful, not only because of the separation, but also because one of the flights was missed as the previous flight was too late. I was trapped in Frankfurt airport for a long time and got home thanks to the kindness of one Lufthansa company employee, but it’s a different story.

After the trip to Mexico, his skype messages got less and less both in content and in quality, he stopped showing interest entirely and disappeared for two days. Then I realized everything was over, I wrote him a letter to say that I regretted even meeting him because he never cared about the relationship. However, he suddenly replied that the relationship was ruined because I was “complaining and moaning all the time”. So I was to be blamed for everything and it was my fault.

Now, it is going to be hard to forget about everything, my heart is in agony. Honestly, I don’t know what to do. All I can do is just perhaps try to remember some bad things about him in order to cross him out of my life. For example, being in the hotel room, I noticed he was putting his legs on the bed without taking off his shoes (laziness or carelessness?), putting his suitcase on the bed, leaving the bathroom in a mess (splashes of water all around the place), consuming too many tic-tacs (tic-tac addict?), scattering his clothes on the floor and wearing the clothes for a long time without washing them, grinding his teeth during the sleep, going to the bathroom with his smartphone in hands. Yet, being in love, I ignored all those unpleasant things about him. This is what love can do. I do not wish anyone what I have been through.

If you have any thoughts, ideas or suggestions, please do not hesitate to contact me at tanyachri@gmail.com

Sincerely,

Tanya

P.S. All of the above is true.