#like these new characters are always written as serious and important... HOWEVER.... hold your horses... there's a catch....

[anyelir]

. yeah. being so long in the fandom makes you indifferent eventually.

[ravnicaforgoblins]

Ravnica for Goblins

The Azorius Senate

History: Founded by Azor I, the Sphinx responsible for writing a majority of the original Guildpact, the Azorius Senate had a big part in organizing Ravnica’s government and maintain it to this day. Theirs is the most complete history, as its members are scrupulous about keeping records. Recording and preserving history is a core tenet of the Azorius Senate, not just for themselves, but for all of Ravnica. As a result, if you need to find a book or a piece of information about the past, the Azorius should have it. Criminal records, personnel files, building blueprints, personal histories; it’s all here. It’s just a matter of getting to it.

Organization: More than any other Guild, the Azorius Senate is meticulously organized. Its three Columns are represented on the Guild’s symbol:

The Sova Column (judges, arbitrators, legal aides, librarians, lawyers, etc) are in charge of making rulings in legal disputes. They decide what’s legal, what isn’t legal, and provide mediation for tough calls. Their word is final and carries serious weight.

The Jelenn Column (scribes, elocuters, notaries, lawmakers, legislators, researchers, messengers, etc) write the laws. Every member dreams of one day adding a new law they’ve written to the Guildpact. Their knowledge of Ravnica’s laws is second to none.

The Lyev Column (lawmages, hieromancers, arrestors, nullmages, investigators, enforcers, soldiers, etc) uphold the laws. They patrol streets, issuing warnings, carrying out warrants, making arrests, and function as eyes & ears on the streets. They are equipped for the job of detaining, pacifying, or incapacitating lawbreakers from any Guild.

Alignment Spectrum: Azorius are lawful if nothing else. The Guildpact is the single most powerful magic on the plane of Ravnica and the Azorius’ knowledge of it is unmatched by that of any other Guild. Laws are literally the source of their power, so having any other alignment can be a serious hindrance to an Azorius member. Ideally, the Azorius are Lawful Neutral, concerned with enforcing the laws as written, with no favoritism for anyone. Lawful Good are those who want to use the law to make life better for others because they believe in it. Hero cops, basically. Lawful Evil are those who use the law to their own means. Dirty cops, basically. Thing is, as long as an Azorius has the law on their side, their Guild will back them up. There may be repercussions, however.

Signature Elements: Since Guildpact magic is as powerful as it is, Azorius don’t have many other requirements besides a strong commitment to carrying it out. Azroius is largely populated by humans, as well as a good number of Vedalken, and their fair share of Giants. Being primarily booksmart, Azorius are very likely to have high Intelligence. They wear white & blue uniforms based on their rank & position, have notebooks & writing implements on them at all times, ride horses or griffins, and standard issue armor & weapons for those out on the streets. Azorius magic is law magic and typically takes the form of runes, symbols, floating letters, and glowing bonds/chains. It is firm & iron-clad, but always more focused on detainment than injury. That said, a 4′11″ Azorius can stop a rampaging 25ft tall Simic Krasis with a word and a piece of paper. That’s not just metaphor, I literally mean a piece of paper and clear annunciation can have that much magical power. Combat-wise, Azorius prefer weaponry that discourages unlawful behavior, such as spears, shields, and hammers. It only hurts if you insist on fighting. Magically, Azorius prefer to nullify threats with spells like Command, Hold Person, and especially Counterspell. Take away a mage’s spells and they might as well be a normal civilian.

Your Role in Ravnica: Patrol the streets, research the Guildpact, follow your orders, and above all, maintain order. That last one is the single most important aspect of being an Azorius, but it doesn’t have to be as constricting as it sounds. “Order” in Ravnica has a different meaning than it does on other planes. If a Rakdos troupe is putting on a disturbing knife display involving blood magic at one of their venues, your job is not to stop the show. Your job is to make sure it doesn’t get out of control and spill out into the streets. The status quo is balance, not utopia. If a Guild is building up an army, your job is surveillance, if a Guild is overstepping their boundaries, your job is to put them back in their place. If a threat to the city or its inhabitants emerges, your job is to neutralize it.

Your Territory: Within the Tenth District, the Azorius are most heavily focused in the 1st, 2nd, and 5th Districts. 1st District, being central within the city and home of the Guildpact, is patrolled most regularly. 2nd District, being the site of the Azorius Guildhall New Prahv, has the highest concentration of Azorius in the entire city. Not just patrols, but living quarters, barracks, airship stations, stables, legal offices, as well as prison compounds. It is among the most heavily guarded & fortified structures on the plane. The 5th District contains Prism University, Ravnica’s most highly esteemed educational college, as well as the Ismeri Library, the largest collection of knowledge & information in the city. While not strictly Azorius, the Library is generally filled with lawmages, researchers, students, and bibliophiles, all commonplace amongst the Senate.

Your Guildhall: New Prahv is the single largest building in Ravnica. A trifecta of titanic pillars towers atop a fortress prison nearly a mile wide and a thousand feet tall. It is an impenetrable reminder of the Azorius’ presence within the city. It’s not particularly subtle, but that’s very much the point. Azorius might be annoying out on the streets, but here they are absolute.

Your Guildmaster: The Azorius Senate has been through many Guildmasters, some longer than others. Like many real governments, most of the Guildmasters have been elected to the position based on legal merit/standing as opposed to physical strength. Most have been human (Konstantin I-II, Leonos I-II, Lucian I-III, Augustin I-IV, Lavinia I), with one Vedalken (Dovin Baan) and a couple of Sphinx (Azor I and Isperia). Their role is to issue final judgements, much like a supreme court judge, as well as to oversee the operations of every branch of the Senate. It is exceedingly rare for them to leave their posts, and almost unthinkable to see them out on the streets or in a fight.

Why You’re Awesome: Azorius know a lot. Not just about their own Guild, but about every Guild. To them, knowing literally is half the battle. The Azorius Senate are that one kid in class who actually reads the textbook and raises the collective average of the rest of the class by at least one letter grade. Not only that, but you have one of the largest & most impressive arsenals on the plane backing you up. Your job is to maintain order in a city with Psycho Murder Clowns, make no mistake, Azorius are built to hold fast against any threat, no matter how big. Paladins, Clerics, Wizards, Bards, Airships, Giants, and Griffins. Azorius are best equipped for dealing with threats that rely on only their strongest skill. Thugs, berserkers, raiders, beasts, etc who can excel at physical combat but dump Intelligence or Wisdom stats. Wizards and Sorcerers with massive repertoires of spells at their disposal but no backup plan for having every spell countered or nullified. Seeing the expressions on these individuals’ faces when they realize they don’t have a contingency for such situations is priceless.

Why You’re Problematic: To call the Azorius unpopular is a bit of an understatement. The general consensus about them among the other Guilds ranges from pity to annoyance to outright hatred. The Azorius are unyielding and non-negotiable, and read way too many gods-damn books. There’s also the matter of Ravnica’s own legal system being your greatest weapon as well as your greatest hindrance. Part of your job is to record all crimes you see, jaywalking through illegal detonation of a Purple Wurm, and there are utter mountains of paperwork attached to report. In addition, your Guild moves at what could generously be called a snail’s pace, requiring any major changes or decisions to go all the way up the ladder before any action is made. Worse, many of the other Guilds know this, and have learned how to subvert and dodge legal ramifications over the millennia. Orzhov specialize in finding creative loopholes in specific laws, whereas your job is more of a broad understanding of them. Last, but almost certainly not least, the Azorius Senate strives to be the pinnacle of law & order within the city, but the system is far from perfect. Mistakes are made, and the consequences can be alarming. Azorius strive towards a Greater Good mindset, and some of their actions in pursuit of this have been downright unforgivable.

Myths: You're boring.

You have a stick up your ass that could crack an Orc skull.

Laws are stupid and you’re stupid for following them.

You are required to be a Rules Lawyer.

You can’t do anything in a real fight.

You have to play a high Intelligence character.

No one likes you.

Reality: You’re dependable.

They’ll thank you for keeping notes someday.

Law Magic is the strongest on this plane, only a few Guilds actually learn it.

Lawmages specialize in rules, Arresters specialize in enforcement.

Your warhammer isn’t for show.

You only have to be smart enough to know who you can hit and who you can’t.

You didn’t join this Guild to be popular.

[thedevillord-writes]

Pandora - Selfless

"Sometimes you have to be selfish to be selfless"

-Edward Albert

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I'd still choose them.

Those were four words that haunted Eisuke, even in his dreams.

Family had always been just a word to Eisuke. A word without meaning. At a very young age, he lost his mother then his father. His sister, with whom he had little to no memory, was taken from him too. Ichinomiya Akira was the man he would put on forms to state as family, but to Eisuke, it was only on paper. They had no blood relations that would make them a true family, just a piece of paper Akira signed years ago that somehow meant Eisuke was his son. Plenty of times before, he wished Akira never signed those papers. All his efforts were overlooked simply because he carried the name 'Ichinomiya'; no one believed the hard work he put in that brought him to where he was today. Family was a burden in that sense.

That statement would not stand with Haruka.

To her, family was everything. Between losing her mother and not knowing her father, one would think that she would have lost faith in keeping a family. It only strengthened the meaning of family, however. They were too important to her.

Having someone important in his life was an alien thought. So did being important to someone. Akira could disown him as easily as he signed those papers. He imagined he was 'important' to his business partners and clients but if they were to lose him one day, they would just replace him with another young, up-and-coming entrepreneur. Even Haruka's position as his secretary was not important to Eisuke. He only hired one because Akira he had to, he could do anything and everything a secretary does by himself. Truth be told, he was going through so many of them that Akira was so close to giving up.

Then she came along.

Through Haruka, Eisuke learnt that perhaps there were things that he could not do in place of a secretary. She dealt with paperwork he did not want to, and with people whom he could not tolerate. If it were not for her, he would be severing a lot more connections. There was no one else who could make that perfect cup of coffee every morning. Before he knew it, she became important to him when Eisuke did not believe in relying on just one person. And for the past eight years, he was important to her too. He was always first priority, attended to before anyone else.

It was not until today did he finally learn that he was only second place, behind her sisters. He was never the most important to her, and he was finding it hard to accept.

Why not?

A knock on the door interrupted his thoughts. He was in no condition to see anyone, but it would not be ideal to shut himself off either. With all the thoughts running wild in his mind, perhaps it would be better for him to be distracted.

"Come in."

Soryu walked in, holding a tablet in hand. He shut the door behind him, and that was when Eisuke knew he meant business. He walked up to Eisuke's desk and sat down, putting the tablet down before unlocking to show him several articles. They all had different headlines, but they were essentially the same story. It was a scandal involving him and Haruka. Though it was not the first time they were accused of an underground relationship, this was the first time the story was accompanied with photos.

Unlike news written about Haruka previously, these were incredibly detailed about her life. They dug up her history, from the day she was born to when she graduated high school, and eventually working for Eisuke. All twenty-six years of her life, they reported everything. One publisher even created a relationship map, mapping out any and every connection Haruka had, and how they were connected to her. That was where her sisters came in. Although not as detailed, there was a page dedicated just to her sisters. Everything about their life was now up and out on the internet for all to see. No wonder Haruka got so protective.

"Baba found out that the reporters went to ambush her sisters at their school too," Soryu added, patiently waiting for Eisuke to finish reading. "Fortunately, they were not hurt."

"Why was this not brought to my attention? They didn't come after me."

"They are sick of reporting about you, Eisuke." Eisuke raised an eyebrow at Soryu's statement. Sick of him? "They know everything there is to know about you. There's nothing shocking about a rich guy dating a common girl, that story has been oversold. The audience wants to know about the girl. Every woman in the population wants to know how an ordinary girl manages to get one of the most affluent bachelors in the country to fall in love with her. All this is just to highlight how normal she is, to up the shock value of the story."

"Haruka is no ordinary woman."

"To you. To everyone else, she's a commoner with all the luck in the world."

He did not like Soryu's choice of words: a commoner with all the luck in the world. Haruka was not born with a silver spoon, the life she led before meeting Eisuke was one led by most. But she was not 'common'; there was no one like her.

His attention shifted back to the articles as he toggled between them. There was no story to be told, in Eisuke's opinion. So what if they knew everything about her life? Yumi replaced Haruka as his secretary, but that did not mean that he would be falling for her instead. If anything, it made Eisuke realise just how much he needed Haruka by his side. Imitations could never be the real thing, no matter how good they were.

"Would you like me to take care of the reporters for Haruka?" Soryu asked.

"No," Eisuke shook his head, leaning on his chair. "It would only create more trouble for her if you do. Let me think."

"I know you, Eisuke. I know what you're thinking about. You can't buy every publishing company in the country to try and stop this."

"I said, let me think."

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Eisuke hated that he could not come up with a single idea to stop this train wreck. Every possible solution that he thought of came with consequences that could do more harm to Haruka. It took an embarrassing long amount of time for him to finally realise that in order for all this to go away, he could not be the person who stood up for her. That would only be feeding the scandal. Someone else had to step in instead.

"Every time I come to this hotel of yours, I'm at awe. To think that I'm invited to the penthouse this time. Wow. Just wow. So this is how the top one percent lives, huh?"

There was absolutely nothing to like about the person that was Sagara Yosuke. The way he moved, the way he spoke. Everything was just so...unappealing.

Yosuke could tell from just one look that he was not liked. He understood Eisuke, however. He would feel hostile toward the man with whom the woman he loved seemed so close. When he was the other party, however, it was simply entertaining to watch.

Eisuke was a simple man. He was put together to look complicated but Yosuke could see through all the facade. He was a man of vision, the casino hotel was prove of that. His tenacity, when it came to business, was possibly rivaled only by Taki's. In his line of work, Eisuke was no doubt the top dog. In the world of romance, however, he was lacking.

There was no doubt that Eisuke had plenty of experience in bed, skilled most likely. He was, however, inexperienced with a serious relationship. Like Yosuke, he did not have one healthy relationship growing up, which was now impairing his ability to hold onto the only relationship he wanted all his life. Perhaps the two men had more in common than Haruka, though if Yosuke were to tell Eisuke that, he was sure to receive a punch to the nose.

"You didn't invite me here to tour your hotel though, did you?" Yosuke hummed, tilting his head. "What could the mighty Ichinomiya Eisuke possibly want from me?"

A tablet was pushed toward him and Yosuke picked it up to read the article on the screen. For the past few days, each and every newspaper and magazine had been running different headlines all involving the same person: Matsuoka Haruka. He did not need to read the entire article to know what they were trying to sell. He had to admit, however, when he first saw the articles, he was shocked. Eisuke did not seem like a careless person, how could he have overlooked such a scandal and let it get so out of hand?

"Would you like me to read it out loud for you?"

"I'd like you to stop these headlines," Eisuke stated.

"Thought you'd be romancing me a little before jumping to the finale," Yosuke grinned, putting the tablet on his lap. "And how do you propose I do that, Mr. Ichinomiya? If you haven't noticed, I don't own any of the publishing firms. And I'm not exactly living in a hotel penthouse with my name plastered on a corporation."

"Don't play games with me. We both know that you are more than capable to stop all this."

"Help me out here a little, I'm confused. Since you're the main character, shouldn't you be stopping this instead? You know, save the damsel in distress and carry her off in your white horse, living happily ever after?"

Instincts did not like, especially not Eisuke's. The more he was in Yosuke's presence, the more he could not stand being around him. That dislike he felt was slowly developing into hatred. But he needed Yosuke's help, so he took in a deep breath to calm himself before looking Yosuke's way.

"If I'm to help, it would only worsen the situation for Haruka. And before you suggest it, the same goes for those I'm associated with. That's where you come in. I trust you can do this discretely?"

"What's in it for me?"

"Name your price."

"I want Haruka."

There was no hesitation at all when he said that, not even for a split second. Yosuke had that demand locked and loaded, waiting for the perfect timing to drop the bomb on him. As much as Eisuke needed his help, he had no intentions of giving up Haruka. While he only recently learnt that he indeed loved her, the depth of his love for her was not measured by time. He would do anything and everything for her, except hand her over to someone else. Particularly to someone like Yosuke.

The delayed response was all that Yosuke needed. All his life, he spent it observing others and using his observations against them, just to see how they would react. He did not mean anything by the provocations, just that it was entertaining. Over the years with Taki and the other guys, they had gotten so used to his usual antics that they barely give a response nowadays and he was starting to feel as stale as a biscuit that had been left out a week too long. Then along came Haruka, and her co-actor Ichinomiya Eisuke. It was painfully captivating how obliviously in love they were with each other. He liked to push they further, just to see if there was a limit to their love.

Instead of answering Yosuke, Eisuke leaned forward and pressed a button on his desk phone. "Yumi, please show Mr. Sagara the way out." He did not spare Yosuke another look, not when Yumi came into the room and when he was finally leaving. Eisuke did not know what he was thinking, bringing Yosuke in. He thought perhaps the friendship he had with Haruka would prompt him to help. He was willing to pay any amount of money Yosuke would ask for, give over the company even. But he drew the line when Yosuke asked for Haruka, be it seriously or jokingly.

Without Yosuke's help, he would have to find another way to solve the problem at hand. Eisuke sighed and closed his eyes, leaning back on his chair while pinching the bridge of his nose. His head was starting to hurt, but he could only think about Haruka. She was alone, suffering from the limelight placed on her. She was used to being in the spotlight, she was trained to be. She always had Eisuke with her, however. When things got difficult, he would jump in and take the bullet for her.

He was not by her side now. She was alone, and vulnerable.

A beep came from his desk phone and when Eisuke pressed a button to answer, Kenzaki's voice was heard. "Mr. Ichinomiya, there is a Miss Matsuoka here to see you."

Haruka? What was she doing here? What if the paparazzi followed her? She would only be further harassed and the story would continue to sell, despite his efforts to try and stop them.

Within minutes, Eisuke was in the lobby and searched for Kenzaki. He took big steps toward the manager, eager to see Haruka and to get her out of public's view. However, it was not Haruka standing next to Kenzaki. The girl bore resemblance to Haruka, but her features were too young. She was slightly taller, only about half a head shorter than Kenzaki without the aid of high heels. The most glaring difference, however, was her school uniform. This was Haruka's sister.

"I thought you said Haruka was here to see me?" Eisuke asked, in a soft but harsh voice.

"I said a Miss Matsuoka is here to see you, I didn't say it was Miss Haruka."

The smile on Kenzaki's face was polite, but Eisuke could see the mischief behind it. He knew Eisuke would rush down here at the mention of Haruka's name, Kenzaki was toying with his boss. Before Eisuke could reprimand him, however, he was quick to dismiss himself.

Looking to the younger version of Haruka, Eisuke felt the awkwardness. What was her little sister doing here? And why did she ask to see him? Still, it was not wise to be seen with a Matsuoka, even if she was not Haruka. Tabloids would exploit any and every story, and this was just feeding them the next headline. Quietly, Eisuke brought the girl to the hotel's restaurant and cleared it out so they could speak freely.

"What's your name?" Eisuke asked.

"Haruna, Matsuoka Haruna. But everyone calls me Nana."

He thought back to the background check Baba performed for him: Matsuoka Haruna was the third and last child of Matsuoka Hanae. She was two years younger than the second sister, and exactly ten years younger than Haruka. While she did not have the best grades like her sisters, she was active in school activities and was a member of several committees here and there. That was all Eisuke knew about her.

"Why are you here, Haruna? Does your sister know you are here?"

"Neither of them knows," Haruna said, picking up the cup of coffee. She grimaced from the smell alone, putting the cup down and pushed it away. "I came to talk to you about Haruka-nee. I'm worried about her."

"What about Haruka?"

"She's been really depressed. She tries to hide the fact that she's upset, like she always does, but it's really obvious this time. Since the reporters came to my school that day, she's been extra protective too. She comes and picks us up from school everyday. She won't tell us what's going on but I know. I think she's forgotten that we've got phones, and people talk. Something's different this time. I don't think it's the reporters, or the articles, or the people talking that's upsetting her. I think it's you."

"Haruna, my intentions were never to hurt your sister. I promise you that I am trying my best to make all this go away. I will fix-"

"I know. Haruka-nee talks about you a lot whenever we meet. She tells me how grateful she is to have met you, and how you have given us so much. She doesn't realise it but, she's in love with you. Probably why she's so upset this time, because she thinks she has to give you up to protect us. That's so Haruka-nee, always doing things for others and not herself."

Eisuke listened silently, watching Haruna. She never made eye contact the whole time, keeping her head low and her eyes trained on her hands that were resting on top of her knees. He could tell she was fidgeting too. She was probably nervous, coming here alone to talk to the man who not only employed her sister but owned the hotel they were in right now. She spoke lovingly of Haruka, and he could hear the croak in her voice that indicated she was holding back tears. This was the love that he did not understand, the reason why her sisters were more important to her than he was.

"She loves us a lot, and I love Haruka-nee too but I wish she would be selfish just once. She's been so selfless, sacrificing so much for us. It's time for her to be selfish. Please don't give up on Haruka-nee. She deserves to be loved too. She deserves to be happy, and I think you can give her that."

[unimpressedperson]

ishin-denshin

(I found that picture in @seoulicons . Thank you for posting that)

Genre: Fluff, Angst

Warnings: I mentioned Expensive Girl and sex, so yeah, nothing here is pure. Also, there are mentions of self-harm, so please, if it’s triggering tell me and I’ll change it :) Your mental health should always come first :)

Pairing: Min Yoongi x @emerson-moonchild, Min Yoongi x Reader

Word Counting: 6.2k

Synopsis: Min Yoongi and Emerson had a profound connection, so deep and supernatural that not even themselves understood it. However, nothing is pure bliss and flowers, when everything seems wrong and the connecting fades with time, then their love shall be proven with no otherwise.

A/N: Hey Em!! It’s finally here! I finished your oneshot + poem. Yes!! I mentioned The Chaos Club and paired them with BTS, but tried not to focus on them. Even though it finished with over SIX THOUSAND WORDS, I had to stop myself and not include random and unnecessary stuff, like interactions between characters without the starring roles presence (Yoongi and Emerson). Oh, before I continue, I changed the band’s name, it’s shitty, but I even wrote one verse of ‘Clarividencia’ (the BTL song mentioned). Hope it’s good! You deserve the best Em, or should I begin calling you ‘cutie pie’? Lol Sorry for my bad grammar and hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing :)

- x - x - x -

Min Yoongi took a long sip on his coffee, dark and, ironically, sugar-free. He enjoyed small ironies and always drank from them, maybe it worked as fuel to his personality. Despite from the cute face and artistic name, Yoongi enjoyed how people were amazed about the personality flashed: rebel, serious, sarcastic, a human with a stone cold heart pumping blood and rage to his organs.

Well, that's how outsiders saw him, reality was insanely different. Emerson knew it, she dig down so deep in Yoongi's emotions, finding a butter heart with so much love stored. Whilst drinking tea from a ridiculously adorned cup, she analyzed his soft expressions and occasional wrinkling nose whenever the bitterness hit his taste buds.

– Tea is just leaf juice, you know, right? - Yoongi asked, not glaring straight at Emerson.

– So what? It's delicious. - Emerson answered, taking a long and loud sip from the salmon and cream coloured cup, raising her pinky. - Coffee is just juice from beans. Water is juice from ice cubes.

– You are so british sometimes. - The man said and turned to look at Emerson, grinning slightly at her cuteness and rosy cheeks.

– Well, my identity backs you up on that. I'm british, living in London, drinking tea in a british coffee shop, listening to british news on television, presented by a british journalist, graduated in a british university, working for a british television broadcast channel. You are the foreigner here, love. - She said serious, but smiling, fingers stuck around the cup, steam warming her face.

– I know. Everything is so british. Even our songs are getting british. - Yoongi said and finished his cup of coffee with a short sip. - Yesterday Taehyung sang with british accent, even the verses in korean. We were surprised and Namjoon almost collapsed cuz one of the words sounded like 'yadong', which is porn in korean.

– I'm surprised one of your songs never mentioned 'yadong', since it's a rock band with pretty explicit musics. - She giggled remembering the first time Yoongi allowed her to listen 'Expensive Girl', their first song that exploded in SoundCloud, and as soon as Bangtan Lads made a career outside Korea, the track was deleted, only officially existing in personal files from every member.

– Don't you throw 'Expensive Girl' at me, it was Jin and Namjoon's idea to release it. - Yoongi said and raised one of his eyebrows slightly.

They were sitting on a table close to the window, sun shining bright outside, breaking through the typical whitish smoke accumulated all over London's atmosphere. The cafè was one of those overrated places, charging abusive prices for a cup of plain coffee, walls painted in a very dirty shade of cream, matching the fancy cups (the owner would never admit it, but Emerson knew they were bought in Walmart, part of a special edition paying homage to Duke William and Duchess Kate wedding), wooden floor well polished, and secondhand machines.

– Why do we insist in coming here anyways? There is nothing special or marvelously tasty, and the prices are salty, even for my rich ass. - Yoongi said, listening the annoying creek sound from the old, and possibly thriftshopped, brown chair.

– Because it's small, quiet and mainly because your fans won't flash boobs outside the window, since they would never imagine rockstar Min Yoongi having a coffee with his girlfriend in a place like that. - Emerson said, staring the street along with Yoongi.

– Yeah, that day we went to Starbucks was insane. Who would imagine someone is actually willing to lift the blouse and get arrested in exchange of an autograph? - Yoongi said and chuckled.

– That day was intense and weird. Her boobs were beautiful, though. Round and symmetrical. Your face tattooed on the nipples also looked good. - Emerson said and smirked in a dorky way, leading Yoongi to chuckle even louder. - Who would ever guess that your nose has the exact shape of a nipple? The fan was a genius, we got to admit.

Yoongi left all the weight from his upper body heavy on the chair back, staring at the ceiling and inhaling deeply, exhaling and repeating. He swallowed a puddle of spit pooling on his tongue and looked back at Emerson, finishing her tea with a short sip and folding back the napkin.

– Fame is so good sometimes. Don't take me wrong, I love making music, being rich and travelling around the globe, but the occasional harassment bothers a lot. - Yoongi said tapping his fingers on the table.

Emerson reached his arm and caressed lightly the skin covered with a sweatshirt. Yoongi inclined to the side, laying his head on table, feeling his girlfriend's fingers petting his black hair. Sometimes words weren't required, silence had a lot to say, loud, actions could hold even more significance.

– I love you, cutie pie. - Yoongi mumbled, cheeks squeezed against the wood, but words still bright and clear.

– I love you too, Yoongles. - Emerson replied, still feeling his smooth wires against her skin. Soft touches coming from both sides.

Whoever saw Min Yoongi up spitting on a microphone, saying raw words about political struggles, sex, mental health, life and a few songs based on stories, possibly thought of him as a rough person. No one would ever imagine his soft side, everyone always glanced over and focused on Suga, not Yoongi. The opposition between personality shown and stage name enchanted and intrigued.

Yoongi only allowed a few people to witness his actual personality.

Opening up and letting someone unknown in his personal space, oh it always represented a problem to Yoongi. A lonely soul that hardly had friends, only close to a few people. Bangtan Lads represented friendship and family.

Namjoon, Hoseok, Jungkook, Seokjin, Jimin and Taehyung flew from Korea to England with him after achieving worldwide success, for the sake of their fame moving to a place rather connected to alternative rock sounded as a clever change. Seven korean boys, carrying a bag with worn-out clothes, instruments and golden discs. Simplicity and luxe. Millions of fans, artists and new faces, yet Yoongi only felt truly comfortable around his bandmates.

After a few months living in England, conceding daily interviews and working like horses in new musics, Yoongi decided to try and join a dating app. Hoseok met a few women through Tinder, but happily found Taylor, friends with benefits at first, but a few months later his girlfriend. Witnessing one of the lads glad in a relationship inspired Yoongi, he even paid for Tinder Gold, regretting immensely after two dates and realizing sex could be good, but lacked connections. He needed to connect with that person, deeply to a point where her heartbeat felt like music.

Lonely and slowly giving up, Yoongi felt his heart flutter when Emerson appeared like a butterfly on his eventful yet boring life. Emerson emerged from a calm life working as music critic for Rolling Stones, to the love of Yoongi’s life and his main inspiration.

Everything began when Emerson went to work and received the task of interviewing a korean band. Apparently someone was sick and everyone else had more important stuff to do. She accepted and decided to use the original agenda, adding a few questions and studying every member.

Those who believe would say it was love at first sight, a connection between souls. Not even a word flew across the room, but Yoongi felt butterflies on his stomach and heart beating faster. For a single moment, he even considered the idea of end having a heart attack, because in years no one ever made him feel like that. Emerson lost words and suddenly, there were only Emerson and Yoongi in a room, not the whole Bangtan Lads.

That same day they had dinner together. Chatted, danced and traded cellphone numbers. Instead of going back to his place, Emerson took him to her home and they watched a movie.

For the first time in a almost a whole year living in England, Min Yoongi felt a connection.

- x - x - x -

– I swear that Zeus’s nutsack is the best position ever. - Namjoon said and threw the notebook in Jungkook’s direction, watching him grab it and read all lyrics written down.

– And why should we sing about that? - Seokjin asked raising one eyebrow, expression deadly serious, grabbing his can of Coca-Cola and sipping from the white straw. - I love doggy style, but would never write a whole goddamn song about it.

– I agree with Jin, the world doesn’t need to know what you and Bárbara are up to. I never wanted to know. - Taehyung said and nodded in Jin’s direction, whilst curling a lock of brown hair on his fingertip. - Honestly, I think you need vacations, your ideas are getting cornier, hornier and grossier.

– Let the man live, you guys! - Hoseok said and took the notebook off Jungkook’s hand, being punched in return. - I don’t even know how the fuck is Zeus’s Nutsack, but if our smartpants wants to write about his experience, allow him to do so. - He gazed down at the lyrics on his hands and chuckled. - Sorry Joon, but this time I’m with Tae and Jin, I won’t sing it.

– Please guys! We are an alternative rock band who has three songs about sex, we need something to bring sexy back during the concerts or fans will feel bored. It’s been two tours since Jimin showed his abs during ‘Clarividencia’ for the last time. People are commenting on Twitter. - Namjoon said and pouted.

– Let’s vote. It’s a democracy, isn’t it? - Yoongi asked, emerging from his big and fluff chair and bending down, his upper body supported by the elbows firmly planted on his skinny thighs. - I vote to burn that shit and never mention it again.

Everyone in the studio laughed, except for Namjoon, he shrunk on his spot and turned the page, sketching and randomly drawing circles, looking for inspiration in something other than intercourse. Yoongi watched everyone leave the studio and sat beside him.

– Remember when we first recorded a full-length album and korean managers wanted us to become a pop? They saw potential in every single one of us, but wanted a profitable artist. - Yoongi laid his head on Namjoon's shoulder. - Thankfully we took our content and moved to an indie recording studio. Can you possibly imagine us as Bangtan Sonyeondan? BTS not BTL? We discussed the idea, and the first sketch of success wasn't the right one. Maybe that song is like BTS, a bit more of thought and time may turn it into BTL.

– Are you saying that I should focus less on the movements itself? The song is pretty explicit, so should I use better metaphors? - Namjoon asked, still not looking at Yoongi, but the older man saw a sparkle run through his eyes, like a lightbulb shining with new ideas flowing through his synapses.

– We can work on it later, right now I want to prepare a surprise to Emerson. Can you believe we've been together for 5 years already?

– Yeah, half a decade. - Namjoon said, sighing deeply. - What do you have in mind?

– I'm gonna propose. - Yoongi smiled, a gummy grin with feelings running off the edge. - I've been planning it for two years now. When we completed our third anniversary, Emerson wrote a post on her personal Tumblr about our relationship, mentioning a few situations and funny moments from day to day. That same day I wanted to make a song, but it's easy, within hours I could finish a masterpiece and the effort would be almost none, so I decided to step up my game a little and began writing a book. Poems about her, our partnership, my feelings, everything.

– It's really thoughtful of you, Yoongs. - Namjoon wrote a few random lines on his notebook and turned to look at his friend. - And some folks still dare to claim you are not a romantic guy.

In fact, not even Yoongi saw himself as someone surfing on romance, usually writing about politics and books. Focusing in feelings and matters related to relationship never appealed. He became responsible for most tracks talking about issues of immigrating from Korea to England, emphasizing that fame changed how they saw him, but xenephobia still existed. Bangtan Lads received a Grammy Nomination for ‘Golden Borders’, a whole album shoving in people’s ears how shittily they treated immigrants, but still wished from heart to live in USA.

Using ‘Golden Borders’ as the soundtrack, Emerson made researches and released a documentary about immigrants, showing the ridiculous racism and highlighting double-standards in how right-wing parties treated foreigners victims of war and those just running from economic crisis, but still wealthy. She also reported how politicians like Donald Trump vertiginously changed the meaning of “immigrants”, not differing someone legal from the illegals.

Yoongi was possibly the proudest boyfriend ever accompaining his significant other during the premiere of ‘Invisible: The Truth on Immigrating’. Emerson invited a few famous people who immigrated from their home-countries, along with “common” folks.

Maybe he wasn’t the most romantic boyfriend ever, but still knew how to encourage Emerson. During their relationship, Yoongi convinced her of writing two books, one script for a movie, produce two documentaries and demand her own column on Rolling Stones site. Whilst she inspired and gave ideas to two albums which earned them four Grammy Awards, abetted him into trying something solo, and produce for different artists aside from BTL.

Even though both of them worked massively with media, Emerson and Yoongi never thought about conceding interviews as a couple. Daily invitations for appearances in shows together popped up on their e-mails, but without discussing it they already knew the answer: No.

When asked the reason, Emerson and Yoongi agreed to keep their personal life, well, private. They already shared a few cute moments on Instagram and Tumblr. Why would someone want to dig more into the relationship? Snooping isn't good.

- x - x - x -

– In conclusion. Communism wasn't planned for over populated countries, or planets. - Jade said and chopped in two the turkey sandwich she was holding, taking a bite from one half of it.

Emerson shrugged her shoulders and nodded, agreeing with Jade. Accompanied by Shmailah and Zariah, they were waiting for the reunion with some other journalists from Rolling Stones. The weekly meeting for coming up with ideas to articles, reportages and new ideas for photoshoots to use in scheduled interviews, was about to happen, but only a few professionals were already there.

Usually, the boss bought some goodies to complement and cheer every meeting, but that day in question had food and sandwiches provided by a new diner across the street. They were lolling on burgers, sandwiches and chips, also milkshakes and cherry fizzy drinks.

– My article about nigerian culinary is going smooth. - Zariah said and took a sip from the vanilla milkshake in front of her. - That restaurant I contacted to ask for primary informations, the old lady sent me fried yams. I’m totally sending her a Christmas card and gift, and candy canes for her grandchildren.

– Great! It's so nice when someone values our work and spoils us with small, yet adorable gifts. - Emerson said and dipped one chip in the ketchup sauce. She was sitting curled up, knees touching her chest, not very excited. - By the way, mine about Bollywood is almost done, but I need some new informations. Can you help me, Shims?

– It's not right to assume I know a lot about Bollywood, only based on my bangladeshi heritage… But yes I’m a fucking Bollywood nerd and would love to help. - Shmailah grinned perversely, caressing Emerson's cheek with love, noticing that she seemed a little down lately. - What's up, Em? You don't seem very happy, not even surrounded by your best friends and a whole lot of free junk food.

The parallel conversation between Zariah and Jade quit, suddenly all three pairs of eyes were gazing at Emerson, who felt her cheeks getting warmer. She took another chip and started talking, whilst shaking the potato around, like a wand, before taking a bite and continuing.

– I don't think Yoongi loves me anymore. - She sniffed, swallowing the growing knot in her throat with chips. - We've been together for five years now, but in the last few months he's been a little distant. I know, I know, Yoongi sometimes loses himself inside his own brain, but not distant like that. Far, you know? We used to be so connected, now that connection seems a little faded.

– Oh Emerson. I don't see that happening, ever. - Jade said, bending over the table to grab her fries-less hand. - Yoongi seems so passionate about you. Whenever we go out in group, he only has eyes for you. Like, when Yoongi notices you barely had the opportunity to speak, he always tries to bring you into the conversation. Jimin already witnessed your boyfriend getting distracted and spend several minutes staring at his lockscreen, which is you.

– Totally agree with Jade. Not even dead Yoongi would stop loving you, he would probably find his way back into our spiritual plan only to make sure you are aware of his love. - Shmailah said, watching a shy tear run down Emerson's rosy cheek

– It's so complicated. In the past two months he spent days without showing up at our place, and not caring to tell where he is. Whenever he is around though, the office's chair receives most attention, since Yoongi locks himself there and if I try to get in, he scouts me outside saying it's something related to work. - Emerson tried to swallow the knot again, but now not even milkshake worked, and she sobbed. - Why couldn't I see if it is about work? When he was recording and producing his solo mixtape, I slept on the studio's couch for four days straight, trying to support him. I'd never do anything to ruin whatever he has been working on. We had coffee today at a cafè, but the experience felt so shallow. Small, verging insignificant, talk.

– I’m so sorry to hear that, baby. What if he’s been working in something for you? Like a gift and doesn’t want you to see and spoil the surprise? - Jade asked, raising one eyebrow. - You shouldn’t conclude always the worse, sometimes it is just something you can’t put immediately put together. Consider it and give time to time.

The conversation silenced in the moment everyone else invited to the meeting showed up. Seven other journalists gathered, including the boss, whose appeared holding another tray full of cookies and cupcakes.

– For what it seems like, that diner also has bakery goodies. - Jackie, also know as The Boss, said pushing the tray up on table. - I love so fucking much my job. Whoever don’t can totally stand up and leave, more cupcakes and chips for me, há!

- x - x - x -

Emerson had no time to think about her situation with Yoongi during the afternoon. Work consumed every disposable piece of brain cell, fulfulling a whole week of articles for her column and completing one reportage about self-made millionaires.

However, after leaving the building and heading home, the empty apartment made her shatter out and cry, sobbing and feeling a sudden urge to destroy something. Not only a random object like a glass cup, but something stiffier and harder to fix, like herself. In years working, dating Yoongi and being friends with so many great people, she never felt that need again, honestly, considering the idea of hurting her own body sounded weirdly appealing, after so much improvement, going back felt like a failure.

Maybe the past years left her brain so occupied with every new information, that negative thoughts had no actual space, a little tab in the corner that was muted by Yoongi’s voice. Now, without his presence and strong connection, Emerson silenced all other tabs, only listening to the one where haters were loud, depression and self-harm spoke freely.

Years of self-improvement faded within a pinch, a thin drop of blood coming from her thigh stained the beige pants, and Emerson left the small, yet painful, piece of skin go from between her long nails.

Weak and sobbing, she reunited all forces and stood up from the front door, walking slowly in bedroom’s direction, wishing only to lay down, curl up inbetween the duvets and sleep, ignoring any bad temptations, observing them disappear along with conscience.

Old monsters, some she saw as teenage ghosts, showed up. Emerson felt stupid for harming herself over such a small reason. Independent woman, smart, successful, amazing close friends, and yet the major breakdown in years was happening because of a man. What kind of mean joke could that be?

She wished so hard to pull herself together again, living happily and not getting to precipitated conclusions over small situations. That's it, maybe she was only overreacting. What if she is not? What if the connection between them is, indeed, fading? What if? What? What?

What was their mistake?

What was her mistake?

Was there a mistake?

Cruel trick her own brain was playing. Blackjack with sanity. Poker with happiness. What did she had to bet? Of course, Emerson conquered a lot in years, how much of that could she lose? Golden Globe? Literature prizes? All had her name embedded in wood. Friendships? Weekly night-outs proved that their bond didn't change within years. Why then only Yoongi seemed to slip through her fingers? The only thing she would miss the most, fading like smoke on the water.

Sometimes, the smartest, strongest, toughest people can go through menaces with delight and peace. Though, their inner monsters exist, and can seem small for whoever witnesses from outside, but a spider is a huge matter to a fly. Struggles and fears, perspective changes them.

Judging someone's feelings and fright isn't up to us.

- x - x - x -

That night Yoongi meant to crash down at the studio, but Namjoon showed up close to midnight, accompanied by his girlfriend, a small and chubby woman with wild brown hair, and also followed by Jimin and Jade, Jin and DiLayla. Their Instagram revealed that everyone had dinner, sponsored by a fancy restaurant trading food for audience.

– Why is everyone here grating me with the grace of your presence? Is there a party happening in my studio and I'm not invited? - Yoongi asked sarcastically, saving the new poem written before anyone could ruin it.

– Cut it out, Yoongi. - Jade said taking her thick beige coat off, leaving it on the black couch. - Don't you think you've been spending way too much time working? Stuck in your office or studio?

Her tone seemed mysterious, as if she meant something more than what was actually voiced. Yoongi felt intrigued watching everyone getting comfortable. Were they intervening?

– What is that? An intervention? I don't do drugs. - Yoongi joked, only him laughing, everyone else seemed morosed.

– See Yoongs, we were having dinner and suddenly Emerson became a subject of discussion. - Jin spoke trying to look chill, but very tense. - Jade mentioned that Emerson has been feeling a bit… Ignored lately. Bárbara and DiLayla agreed...

– Let me speak, love. - DiLayla touched Jin's shoulder and stood up. - Emerson mentioned to us that you’ve been working way too much, even at home, and she thinks you don't love her anymore. Basically, she feels like your connection is slowly vanishing.

– Namjoon told us what you've been planning for proposing to her, and honestly, I will take note and use a few of your ideas someday. - Jimin gave a side grin to Jade, watching how she blushed and continued. - But maybe, just maybe, you focused so much on something to her, that kind of forgot her? Not literally, we know you love Emerson with every beat of your heart, your maeum [마음, something like feelings], but you know, you can't starve a man before feeding him…

– What? Emerson is feeling neglected? - Yoongi asked, chocked and feeling his heart breaking.

Yoongi turned the chair around when tears verged to fall, not wanting to face his friends whilst crying. Jin, Jimin and Namjoon only saw him emotionally shattered in two situations. Feeling raw and vulnerable always made him uncomfortable, mainly being stared by people he had no intimacy, like his friends’s girlfriends, they were cool, but not close enough to watch him with guards down.

The young man hated this aspect of him. He despised how inadvertently his mind let things pass without noticing, facts around that could vastly affect his life, personal or professional. Having Emerson always picking up on him about unhealthy habits made it easier to don't die after spending three days living off hard liquor and olives, and overworking.

He wasn't someone mindless, or easily distracted, but Emerson helped him to focus in more than one thing at once, like working, but still resting enough, or channeling the best from every situation. Hiding something from her, avoided the warnings. Without realizing, Yoongi evicted his girlfriend from working aspects of him.

Maybe Jimin was right. He focused so much in doing something for Emerson, that he forgot to live with Emerson.

Goddamn it, Yoongi!

Namjoon looked around and politely asked everyone to leave the studio for a moment. He pulled a chair and sat beside Yoongi, caressing his trembling shoulder.

– I don't think I ever saw you crying over something so simple to solve. - Namjoon whispered, still petting his friend's shoulder. - You know nothing is lost and what to do is actually easy. The solution may ruin a huge surprise, but it is going to soothe a small injure caused by itself.

– What if Emerson has been considering to break up? Oh fuck, Joon! What if I ruined it all? - Yoongi used his sleeves to dry off his tears. - What if everything is so lost that not even all poems I wrote could fix it?

– See, a few weeks ago me and Barbs were talking about couples that gathered together along the past years. - Namjoon said and stopped caressing Yoongi's shoulder. - First, Hoseok and Taylor, then you and Emerson, Jade and Jimin, Di and Jin, me and her, Zariah and Jungkook, and Shims with Tae. I think we created an equilibrium in universe. Everyone is such a great and right match that if at some point one these couples break up, a new Big Bang would happen, cuz the mutual decision could ruin the universal balance.

“I'm not being far-fetched, I swear in the name of Stephen Hawking. - Namjoon spoke and made a cross in his chest. - Sometimes a long-term relationship can go through challenges. Two different people sharing a life of experience cannot live without occasional fights, bickering or arguing. We are human, even the most rational ones can be stubborn. All you have to do is insist. Although, it seems like Emerson loves you as much as you love her, so the only struggle here is distance.”

– You are right, but I’m still feeling like a sucker. - Yoongi snuffled, cleaning the coryza from his runny nose. - But as Emerson already told me, I should learn from my mistakes, then use it on an inspirational song, making my fans wander on what actually gave me the idea to it. - He grinned passionately and turned his cellphone screen on, staring at the lockscreen: a stunning picture of Emerson in Japan, smiling, using a flower crown and surrounded by cherry blossoms. - I love her so much.

Next thing processed by cameras around the building was a very hurry Yoongi grabbing his stuff, leaving a group of friends behind. A determined face, quick steps and then driving fast through the parking lot, tyres screaming like Robert Plant in the beginning of ‘Immigration Song’.

- x - x - x -

Emerson woke up in a startle after hearing the front door banging loudly. Still sleepy, she had no energy to stand up and check what was happening. Sleep whilst crying is exhausting, you wake up psychologically weary. After a few minutes and heavy steps, she heard someone calling her name, more specifically, Yoongi calling chanting her name.

She stood up, bringing one of the duvets along, and walked to the room, where Yoongi was crouched down, sitting on his calfs, typing something on the laptop he settled on the coffee table. When the man side glanced Emerson, he got up on his feet and hugged her, feeling his heart shatter with the small, yet present, dot of blood staining her beige pants.

– I’m so sorry. Forgive me, please… - Yoongi whispered, trying not to cry again, not before actually accomplishing his new goal for the night. Also, his mind was worried about the blood on her leg. - Did you hurt yourself, baby? Oh fuck, did you?

– Why? What did you do? - Emerson questioned feeling his arms around her, resisting before letting the duvet down and hugging him back. - I pinched myself a little too hard, but I swear it wasn't serious. Sorry...

– I was distant and absent from your life, and now you are convinced I don’t love you anymore. - He swallowed the knot on his throat, still trying not to cry. - It’s so dumb, because the only thing I love more than you is my music, but you are the inspiration for my work, so you are my music… And I made you hurt yourself.

– No, please Yoongles, it was a small relapse. Not worth of a fuzz. It won't happen again. - She felt his uneven heart beat against her ear, touching his chest. - Who told you that? Who told you how I was feeling? - Her arms quit hugging him, a tension running through both bodies.

– I don’t know, today I was finishing a project for you in my studio and Namjoon, Jin and Jimin showed up, they were accompained by their girlfriends. They told me how you were feeling and made me realize how far I’ve been, and how cold I acted earlier. - He seemed uncomfortable revealing his sources of information, but the truth would end up appearing anyways.

– Wait a second… - Emerson dried the single tear left running down her cheek and stared Yoongi. - Have you been working in something for me? Like, a surprise? A gift?

Yoongi shrugged his shoulders and nodded. His mind was hazy and the urge to just kneel and propose to Emerson without previous background was slowly taking over his guts. He couldn’t predict her reaction, since every brain cell were occupied on finding the right words. Fortunately, the woman grinned shyly and blushed, gazing down on the laptop.

They sat down in front of the open laptop, his arms around her shoulders. Yoongi sighed and pressed the ‘enter’ key, watching Power Point opening and a clear book cover appeared, mint coloured like his hair.

The book Yoongi worked for two years was almost ready. Whilst looking for good names and aesthetics a japanese word loomed from his pre-teenage memories: ishin-denshin (以心伝心) and his book title fitted like a glove. A compilation of poems and the last one, in Yoongi’s humble oppinion, the most majestic one was named after the piece itself. He planned on proposing whilst reading to Emerson.

– You asked me nothing, but I feel the need to explain what’s in front of you. - Yoongi cleared his throat, watching Emerson’s eyes scanning the screen. - My gift for our fifth anniversary was a book. I’ve been planning it for two years now, and in the last two or three months I reached the final details, which were cover and last poem. I never allowed you to see it, because I wanted it to be a surprise. I guess old habits never die, because during the time spent working on that book, I isolated myself from you and gave a wrong impression. Sorry.

– It's so beautiful, even though I don't even know what the title means. - Emerson said and sobbed, smiling through tears. - If the whole book is in japanese, then it would be good if you taught me how to read.

– Oh, cutie pie. I love you so much. - Yoongi snorted and kissed the top of Emerson's head, whose felt so loved, more than she felt in months. - It's, indeed, in japanese. Ishin-denshin, it's a kind of interpersonal communication, unspoken, but the understanding is still mutual. Something like, heart transmits what mind thinks. That word was a trend back in my pre-teenage years, never thought I would use it.

Emerson turned to look Yoongi. His eyes were watering, but no tears falling. She smiled, happily and kissed him. In months, they kissed plenty of times, but none of them had the same meaning as this one. It wasn't sexy or teasingly, if we are going to be honest, the kiss was salty with tears and, well, coryza. Emerson and Yoongi were slowly reconnecting.

The kiss stopped when their lungs claimed for air. After a few smooches, they got back to stare the screen.

– I love you so much, Yoongles. - Emerson felt a magnetic force making her back look for support on his chest, diminishing the space between them. - I know it's dumb, but I firmly believe we are soulmates, there is a supernatural connection between us, and considering the idea of losing you… it made me so desperate and sad. I know I would keep living, but my soul would never feel completed again.

– I know baby, I feel the same way, but instead of voicing my feelings, why don't you read a few poems I wrote? -Yoongi leaned and wrapped one of his arms around her shoulders again, smiling passionately whilst seeing skinny knees touching the chest, covered by a fluff light pink sweatshirt with ‘Treat People With Kindness’ written in a plain white font. He remembered the day they bought the piece of clothing after a Harry Styles concert in London. What a fun night, hanging around with him after the event. As Yoongi said earlier, being famous has its perks.

Emerson felt immersed in deep feelings, some of them not even voiced during their relationship. Yoongi wrote small poems about every aspect of her: from her cute moles, to how he loved petting her hair before sleeping, or how her voice was sweet like honey and face cute as a mochi. Everything, he wrote inspired by moments they shared, like the trip to Japan during spring, or New Year’s Eve in China. The first time Emerson tried kim chi and how her nose puckered when the spicy taste finally hit her taste buds. When she first attended to Bangtan Lads concert and fanchanted along with ARMYs, taking a few of them to backstage. Travelling to Brazil and messaging Bárbara instead of using Google Translator.

They lived so many precious moments together. Yoongi made sure over 100 of them became art through emotional poems.

The last one, named ‘Ishin-denshin’. She took a deep breathe, still sobbing with happy tears running down her face. The silence only broken by occasional snorts and chuckles. However, Yoongi was getting more tense, staring at her eyes.

Ishin-denshin

Once upon a time in the far land of England

A woman gave birth to love impersonated in flesh, blood and gold

No one knew how important she was and how lucky they were

Until chaos from Korea arrived and trapped her in maeum.

Connections can cross the border of space and time

Voices and signs

Touches and sights

You and me, hands holding tight.

Love is a matter of ishi-denshin

Ability to communicate from mind to heart

Open up on a gaze

Not a sound to be heard from mouth.

Thankfully chaos and peace mingle and complete each other

Yin and Yang united by their differences

Perfecting what was already sculpted with dust and water

Remodeling and always improving, resulting in brand new peculiarities.

Love and connections are the result of fighting

Nothing good comes easy

Nothing easy is good

Once you find balance, universe rewards you with love.

Continents separated us for most part of our days on earth

Wandering uneven, looking for the half that best fit our soul

Happily odds were and allowed what resulted in balance

Only imagining myself without you, even my brain in plain conscience feels afoul.

Don’t you dare saying you are not good enough

Cutie pie, you are unique like flakes of snow

Every drop has its own shape

Unique, you never see two looking the same.

My heartbeat is in sync with yours

Slow like when we sleep

Or when we kiss after a long period apart, tumbling in ribcage, rhythm vigorous

I thank everyday for finding my soulmate in a sweetheart like you.

Stay for as long as you want

I feel lucky only by having in my life as a constant

Luckily it won’t change much

When I finally make you a Min like me, everything mine will be ours.

When Emerson finished reading ‘Ishin-denshin’, Yoongi didn’t quite gave her time to think broader and stood up, pulling the woman together. Standing side by side, he kneeled in front of Emerson and proclaimed, among tears and sobs, holding one hand whilst looking for something in his back pocket.

– Emerson, after all those words you’ve read, would you give me the honour of becoming my Mrs.Min?

– The only possible answer is yes.

- x - x - x -

P:S I purple you <3

[thefinalcinderella]

DIVE!! Book 4 Chapter 4-OH, MY JINX!

I always felt bad for Reiji because throughout the series he got pushed to the background pretty much because he isn’t a main character, and this chapter just made me even sadder! Reiji, I hope you can shine, achieve your dreams and be appreciated for yourself one day!

Also just realized it’s been almost a month since the last chapter (sorry guys)

Full list of translations here

Previously on DIVE!!: We catch up with Hiroya and Miu.

Tomoki seemed to have dived successfully. Although it was difficult to see his aerial performance well from above the steps, the judges’ scores told all. Four of them gave 8.5 points, and two of them gave 8 points. One gave 7.5 points. It was a good performance if all those points were applied to a dive from Group 6. What’s more, Tomoki had never received anything less than 7 points from a judge today. He did accurate performances with no mistakes. Did Tomoki unnoticedly learn what was both the easiest and the hardest?

After Tomoki, who served as the anchor for the third round, Reiji, as the person in the top of the fourth round, took in three deep breaths while waiting for the whistle to signal the start of the performance.

Calm down. Calm down. Calm down.

Other people were other people. He was himself. In less than a year, he surely had it thoroughly beaten into him that he had not one single good thing to compare with others. Regardless of Tomoki, because he did what he himself should have done, it was alright. Even at the time of the fourth round’s performance, before he got onto the platform he diligently performed bending and stretching exercises three times, stepping onto the stairs with his right foot. Stopping at the tip of the five-meter, he swallowed the word “water” that he had written on his palm with his finger. (1) He could only leave luck to heaven.

When Reiji dealt with a competition, he tended to not settle down unless he faithfully did the huge pile of jinxes that he created himself. He never told anyone about it because it seemed stupid to tell people, but to Reiji, they were sacred rites.

“Stretching three times” itself wasn’t very meaningful, and he was all too aware of that. During a competition, when he stretched three times before going up to the platform, he ended up with a good result by chance. Even though he knew it wasn’t because of the stretching, Reiji was relieved by adding it to the countless numbers of jinxes on his Jinx List.

He understood himself a little. Reiji was the type who got extremely anxious. That’s why he continued to create jinxes to preserve himself. The more jinxes he had, the more they filled his head just by performing them, and he could hold his many idle thoughts at bay.

But, on this day…only on this day of fate, it was almost impossible to only think about his jinxes.

And so, he failed. When he was waiting just some time ago, he had messed up calling out to Tomoki, who had been about to go on for his turn.

“Um, just now, Youichi-kun…”

Tomoki probably dived with the words he said in mind. If he made a mistake it would be his fault. Although, if he had finished his sentence, Tomoki definitely would have messed up his diving while dragging around a terrible shock.

Remembering that feeling, Reiji’s shoulders suddenly shook. He himself was still dragging around that shock.

The feeling of Youichi’s palm, which he placed on Reiji’s shoulder as he told him, “Yo, do your best” just before the beginning of the finals.

Like it was shivering, like it was burning.

“Um, just now, Youichi-kun…”

Felt really hot—.

Reiji had already noticed that Youichi wasn’t in perfect condition. Although Youichi had abstained from the springboard diving competition that took place before this high diving competition, giving the reason of poor physical health, but he didn’t think that was necessarily a lie either. However, even if he was in perfect condition, Youichi probably would have abstained from the springboard anyways in order to fight with the same conditions as Tomoki and Shibuki.

He had started his fierce training session two weeks before today’s qualifying trials. Though the sight of someone seeming to breathe fire was no longer unusual at the MDC, he didn’t think that Youichi would be desperate enough to take on a new event at the last minute.

The reverse 2½ somersaults in pike position. It was a difficult dive, but the degree of difficulty wasn’t especially high. Was it worth it to go so far as to take a break from school just to go to the pool every single day?

For Reiji, Youichi was showing an inexplicable obsession. Youichi, who was receiving intensive training from Kayoko until he was exhausted, had astonishingly managed to actualize that new event in such a short time. He said he’d do it, and he did. That was Youichi. Even though the success rate of a no-splash entry was still low, it truly was monstrous to be able to master a new event in just two weeks.

But, his body was human. As the monster rampaged more and more, the body would exhaust itself by bearing that burden. Day by day, Youichi grew more haggard, and lost more color from his skin. Even so, he never tried to rest his body. Even yesterday before the competition, after returning from sightseeing around Kobe with the others and talking about Asaki Kayoko in Reiji’s room, he must have been doing self-training by himself until the middle of the night.

Reiji knew that because after everyone left last night, he noticed in his phone’s call history that he got a call from Ryou. Out of consideration for his roommate Sachiya, who was already sleeping soundly in his bed, he went out to the lobby from his room to try to call Ryou back, and happened to come across Youichi, who had a nylon bag in hand for practicing in the hallway.

“I thought I’d get a commemorative stamp at Tsutenkaku.” (2)

Youichi glossed it over with a lame joke, but he got on the same elevator as Reiji and pressed the button for B1 instead of the front lobby. The laundromat and the ping-pong room were in B1. As well as the heated swimming pool.

Is he going to go practice in the pool…?

The moment he had that hunch, Reiji felt a bad uneasiness. Youichi, who was so cornered that he couldn’t help but practice at the last minute, had eerie, purplish skin.

That was why on this day, Reiji wasn’t very surprised that Youichi didn’t do all that well in the preliminaries.

But, when I was touched by that hot palm…

He felt that the cogs of the day had gone wild in that one moment.

No matter how much his condition worsened, no matter how much he lost his composure, he would definitely overcome it in the end, because he was Youichi. And so, when he smiled his usual proud smile, Reiji believed in him up until right before that hot hand touched him.

However, if Youichi’s poor condition was more serious than he thought, then he couldn’t see the outcome of this important match at all. Anyhow, in order to compensate for Youichi’s poor condition today, Tomoki and Shibuki continued their faultless steady advances from the preliminaries.

Of course, the other non-MDC athletes still had a chance.

Right at the moment he was waiting for the whistle, Reiji’s gaze wandered towards the divers standing in a line at the bottom of the steps.

When it came to winning the championships, currently it was Pinky…er, Camel Yamada who was at the top. Was it human to be able to change so much just with one image color? Nakayama was also a dark horse, who, with his high difficulty dives, won’t be outdone by Youichi. Or, could it be Asama, who was the oldest and had the most mature performances, who would be laughing in the end?

As the faces of each major contender sprang up in his mind, Reiji noticed that he wasn’t including himself there even in his imagination and smiled bitterly.

It couldn’t be helped.

Other people are other people. I am myself. Just like how Tomoki has his own rivals and Camel has his own rival, I have my own rival.

What matters now is defeating that rival.

Reiji switched gears and glared at the tall diver who was waiting for his turn right behind him.

Moriya Kazuteru, who passed the preliminaries in eleventh place. No matter who he lost to in these finals, he was the only one who he definitely wouldn’t lose to. Therefore, if he didn’t dive carefully and cautiously for each round…

Reiji renewed his enthusiasm for the fourth round.

Stop focusing on Tomoki and Shibuki and get fired up by them. Don’t try to make yourself look bigger, perform calmly like in practice, and steadily go through with it. I can’t defeat Moriya by diving like I’m gambling desperately, because first, that way of diving doesn’t suit me.

“Reiji, your diving gives off a feeling of, like, stuffiness. It’s nice to be careful, but I mean, it’s not very impressive, and it’s missing appeal.”

Last night, that was just said to Reiji by Ryou on the phone.

“Anyways, isn’t it fun diving by yourself? For at least once, you should make yourself explode with a bang, be more extreme, and try to do things as you want to do them. Even for tomorrow’s competition, since there’s no chance you’re going to win, you should be more adventurous.”

It seems that Ryou, who had been playing nothing but basketball everyday nowadays, was encouraging his former clubmate who had his fateful battle coming up soon, in his own way.

But, honestly, what he’s saying is just unpleasant, Reiji thought. Even though Ryou can’t see the good points of people at all, he excels at finding out the things that they don’t want to see.

He was faithful to the basics. He had a sense of stability. The balance for his entire body was good. Those special qualities of Reiji could also be taken for boringness, monotony, and lack of personality if he made just one mistake. He himself knew that. To sum it up in one word, unremarkable. In place of having few failures he had no big success, and in place of being thoroughly trashed he had never been praised. He often heard the word “sparkle” in sports manga, (3) as in “I can’t stand to see the inexperience, lack of skill, roughness, and clumsiness in your performance, but there is a sparkle of light in it”. Reiji was lacking that sparkle that easily, almost unfairly converted all his negatives to positives.

But, in the end, this is my own diving.

After worrying about his troubles, it was a testament of Keisuke’s great power of being the MDC’s head coach that he came to be satisfied with that.

There is no point in asking yourself for something that isn’t within you. Develop something specific and change it into power. Keisuke encouraged Reiji by saying that at every opportunity.

In the first place, a comment from Keisuke was also the impetus for him to begin diving.

“Why don’t you join the club and try diving fully? Perhaps you can grow up to become the part of the best three in the Japanese Championships.”

The summer of second grade. Reiji had just been stamped with the mark of disqualification of the coach of the gymnastics club that he frequented until then, having been told that “your body is too big for gymnastics”.  He had been somewhat hurt by the first setback in his life and became dispirited. As such, Keisuke, who called out to him in a diving try-out class he was invited to by his friends, was like a “god of picking up” (4) for Reiji.

It wasn’t just Reiji; there were quite a lot of athletes who switched from gymnastics to diving. Gymnastics fostered physical strength and flexibility, which manifested as they were in aerial performances.

At the time when Reiji started, he was much quicker to learn than Tomoki, who joined around the same time. Of course, he was scared at first, and it took time for him to get used to the feeling of landing in the water. Even so, he gradually gained experience, competed with Tomoki and Ryou, and polished his skills little by little while supporting them. Also, while priding himself on the inside for leading one step beyond Tomoki and Ryou.

That had been the story up until that lady coach appeared.

After Asaki Kayoko appeared, the MDC changed dramatically. It was like they were sparrows chirping on an electric line for all that time and getting swallowed up by turbulent air, and then crossing over towards the sea all together. Tomoki successfully spread his wings riding on that stream. Next thing they knew, Shibuki, with his strange wings, joined them, bringing about a new wind. Finally, even Youichi bared the talons that he had been hiding, and began to reveal his fighting spirit. When he wondered where exactly they were going, they said they were aiming for Sydney.

The Olympics—.

“Perhaps you can grow up to become the part of the best three in the Japanese Championships.”

For Reiji, who had adopted that sentence as his target, it seemed like an unreal, illusory stage.

Other people are other people. I am myself. It was after that that he came to repeat it over and over, like an incantation.

To be honest, he was envious of Tomoki. There were times where he was jealous of him, frustrated with him, and didn’t want to see his face. Please let me quit the MDC. He murmured that sentence many times in his mouth. But, when he thought about Keisuke’s sad-looking eyes every time a student left, he wasn’t able to discard from himself the “god” who had once picked him up.

If he kept going anyways…he could have encouraged himself to head for the Olympics against his will. However, as Reiji took one step forward, Tomoki was always advancing five and ten steps forward. No matter how much he flapped his wings he couldn’t catch up to him, and on the contrary, the distance between them was widening. Before he knew it, he had completely strayed away from the flock that was headed to Sydney. No, maybe he was the only one who thought he was flying together with everyone else, even for a moment.

While glancing sideways at the quickly overheating representative battle, in order to continue diving anyways, Reiji took a long time to make himself understand one thing.

Tomoki’s goal was different from his own goal. Therefore, their paths were different. Their paces were different.

Being different was fine.

Best three at the Japanese Championships.

Wasn’t that enough to boast to his children and grandchildren in the future?

To Reiji, who got to that point steadily, his breakthrough in the preliminaries of this grand stage was, without exaggeration, a wonderful, major event that was so delightful that it seemed slightly strange.  

Reiji knew that no one expected him to advance to the finals, much less win the competition. Though he thought that was understandable since it was a battle filled with veterans, at times even he wanted to create a miracle. A miracle that people like Tomoki, Shibuki, and Youichi could create. No matter how tiny it was.

“Congratulations, Rei-kun. It’s just like a miracle!”

It was a blessing from Sachiya, so he accepted it obediently. Not only Sachiya, but all of the MDC, including Keisuke, congratulated Reiji, and they were happy that they were all together.

Reiji knew that effort wasn’t always rewarded. Nevertheless, if he pressed on, if he didn’t give up, then one day that day might come.

During the lunch break after the preliminaries, Reiji went outside the venue, feeling as though he was floating on air. Sitting on the stairs that extended from the entrance of the giant dome to the traffic roundabout, he exposed his dizzy head to the cold December wind. They weren’t the main stairs that led to front entrance, as he purposely chose a deserted, out-of-the-way corner. It was because of a jinx where other people must not step on his shadow on the day of the competition until victory or defeat was reached.

Jinx. Perhaps it was thanks to his jinxes that he was unexpectedly able to stay in the finals.

Reiji thought back quickly on the day.

The competition began in the morning from the moment you woke up. Just like what Keisuke often said, Reiji’s jinxes also began in the morning, from the moment he woke up. The very first thing was his wake-up orange juice (more than 30% fruit juice). Breakfast was mainly vegetables and fish. He didn’t eat meat. Since the hotel’s breakfast was mainly Japanese food in a buffet style, that wasn’t a problem. He drank water at breakfast, not Japanese tea. That was because the damage would be too great if the tea stalk didn’t float upright (5). And he always cut his nails after breakfast. When he went to the competition, he wore dark-coloured clothing on a clear day, and wore bright clothing on cloudy or rainy days. In other words, he prepared two sets of clothing in advance. He entered the venue with his right foot. He used an odd-numbered coin locker. He put his left foot through his swim trunks first. He ate an apple one hour before the competition started (in case he couldn’t get an apple, he could substitute with apple juice with more than 30% fruit juice). And so on…

Of course, his current ability was accumulated by working in tandem with his coaches. Whether or not he could demonstrate that ability in his performance was another problem. Reiji thought that if thanks to his jinxes he was able to preserve the calmness of his mind, then they could never be ridiculous. By upholding his jinxes, he was upheld by the jinxes.

Reiji quietly sucked in a breath and looked at the wristwatch on his left hand.

There was an hour and a half before the competition started.

The finals. He, who had passed the preliminaries in dead last, wondered how well he was going to do in them.

Best three? A thousand percent impossible.

Within fifth place? Impossible with that lineup.

Within eighth place? Still unrealistic.

Within tenth place? That’s also uncertain.

Within twelfth place? That was everyone.

He should at least escape from last place. Yes, around eleventh place would be a suitable goal for himself.

I’ll aim for eleventh place!

Reiji swiftly stood up, stepping forward with his right foot with energy. Now, he was heading into battle, and he went towards the entrance hall with bigger strides than usual.

Then, from behind Reiji, the shadow of a person running vigorously suddenly appeared and overlapped with Reiji’s shadow that was stretched out on the stairs, just as he overtook him.

…Shadow?

Reiji, turning around with a start, saw the foot of the man approaching from behind on his shadow and almost fainted.

My…my shadow was stepped on!

The man who had ruined in an instant the day that he had been paying such meticulous attention to—Moriya Kazuteru.

At that moment, Reiji’s goal changed from “Aim for eleventh place!” to “Beat Moriya!”.

Come hell or high water, he’ll beat Moriya Kazuteru at the very least.

At the moment he waited for the whistle to signal the start of the performance, Reiji gave another menacing look at Moriya, who was behind him.

Watch, Moriya. My careful, faithful to the basics performance.

His event was the forward 1½ somersaults and 1 twist in free position. It was the same dive that Camel Yamada dived in his third round. Though the long-limbed Camel wore a pair of camel-colored swim trunks, he still mesmerized the audience with a performance so beautiful that it was almost disappointing when he sank into the water.

He didn’t have Camel’s beauty, Tomoki’s lightness, Youichi’s skill, or Shibuki’s strength. So, at the very least, he could show a steady, stable performance.

Approach. Take-off. Jump. Rotations. Entry. Reiji rehearsed the series of performances on his mind, and for some reason at that moment, Kayoko’s voice suddenly floated through his head.

“Congratulations, truly, on advancing the finals. So now I have one request for you: in the finals, I hope that you can do a bold performance because it’s okay to fail. When I look at you, Maruyama-kun, how do I say this—it feels like you’re restricting yourself too much. Certainly, it’s important to look at your current self. But, don’t label it as your future self. If you summon your courage and break out of your shell, you would surely burst open a new future from there on out.”

What had she wanted to say? Even though diving cautiously isn’t a bad thing. Does it seem like I don’t have any courage?

Originally, Reiji hadn’t liked Kayoko, who had chosen Tomoki rather than him. It was because of that lady coach that the MDC became chaotic, and it was a little sad that Keisuke faded into the background thanks to her. Therefore, as for the story was that she was going to return to America, deep down Reiji still hadn’t seriously accepted that either.

Stuff like being more extreme, and diving boldly.

Both Ryou and that woman can say whatever they like, because it has nothing to do with them.

But I have my own strategies and chances.

Number one, be cautious; number two, be cautious; there is no three and four, and number five, be cautious!

Right at the moment Reiji renewed his determination, the whistle signalling the start of the performance resounded, and like a needle being stuck into the top of his head, his nervousness ran through his head.

It had been six years. His daily, repeated practices. His numerous, self-created bruises. His tears of frustration. The struggles of trying to balance practice with his studies. His decreasing number of friends. The love letter that he didn’t know how to reply to.

He concentrated all of his nerves to his chest on those things, as he stepped one step forward in his approach.

For a moment, he felt like he was about to faint again.

“Uuh..”

Oh no, I stepped forward with my left foot…!

But his body was already moving.

He wasn’t allowed to stop.

The tip of the platform was coming closer.

Dammit, if it’s like this, then I’m already desperate!

Before the eyes of Reiji, who raised his arms overhead with more force than usual and threw his body out with all his strength, a new future burst open brightly at that moment.

Rankings as of the Fourth Round (Cumulative)

①     Yamada Atsuhiko (197.64 points)

②     Okitsu Shibuki (196.86 points)

③     Sakai Tomoki (186.15 points)

④     Ogawa Shinobu (182.97 points)

⑤     Kaburagi Shinji (180.6 points)

⑥     Matsuno Kiyotaka (179.01 points)

⑦     Asama Takashi (177.9 points)

⑧     Nakayama Masahiko (176.1 points)

⑨     Maruyama Reiji (166.02 points)

⑩     Moriya Kazuteru (160.2 points)

⑪     Tsuji Toshihiko (153.51 points)

⑫     Fujitani Youichi (139.11 points)

Translation Notes

1. You might have seen this in anime or somewhere else, but swallowing a word written on your palm is believed to help you overcome that thing

2. Tsutenkaku Tower is a famous landmark in Osaka where I think you can get stamps and other souvenirs

3. The word used here is “スポ根漫画” which literally means “fighting spirit manga”. “スポ根” (supo-kon or spokon) refers to a Japanese manga, anime, and drama genre from the 1960s where the protagonist overcomes the obstacles in his chosen sport through sheer perseverance and hard work. Titles that helped pioneer this genre include Ashita no Joe and Attack No.1. Many of the shonen sports manga and anime we have today still have many influences from these old works (got all this from wikipedia jp)

4. “God of picking-up” (拾う神) comes from the Japanese idiom “ 捨てる神あれば拾う神あり “ which literally means “when one god abandons you, another one picks you up”, which basically means “when one door is shut, another door is open”

5. A superstition/fortune-telling thing where an upright-floating tea stalk means good luck

Next time on DIVE!!: An interlude!