#mcu and spoilers

[lenoredovescovey]

I love the thought of the new avengers showing up in doomsday with bob in tow and everyone else being like

“who the fuck is that”

“bob”

“why is he here”

“he’s our friend”

[redundantz]

Problematic found family

[hurtspideyparker]

YES the Thunderbolts have a fantastic team as family dynamic, yes they are living in Avengers tower, yes history is repeating itself and 2012 tower fics are so back. BUT!

instead of "Alexei eating poptarts" or "Yelena in the vents", we must come up with new headcanons and make history

Bob always does normal domestic chores, often getting in the way of important missions and spy business. "All I'm saying is Bucky is our best sniper" "It would be a much quieter assassination if I just slipped into the condo and cut his—" "Hey sorry guys, anyone have laundry? I'm doing a load"

Yelena and her guinea pig always eat meals together at the dining table. Everyone has their Chinese food or barbeque, meanwhile the rodent is loudly munching on a salad right beside them

Bucky is the mom and always keeps them on track. "Ava you have a dentist appointment in the morning, and bring Bob so they can add him to the insurance. Lena how was therapy? Alexei, I said no vodka until dinner"

Alexei is always coming up with new promotional ideas for the team. Cartoon tv show, cereal, toothpaste flavour...every day he thinks he's come up with the next big thing. Whenever they actually get put into production (Wheaties) he collects and saves it, and won't let anyone use a different product. (He threw out Yelena's frosted flakes and it took both Bucky and John to get her to stop attacking him)

Ava likes to phase and sneak attack her teammates at random. She claims it's for training but really she just thinks it's funny hearing them scream

John gets blamed for everything, even if it isn't his fault. Especially if it isn't his fault: "who ate the last bagel?" "John." "Where's my hair straightener?" "John had it." "Whose turn is it to unload the dishwasher?" "Johnnnn"

[tinymintywolf]

you're not alone.

[coralinejones]

the difference between their reactions to john falling is killing me 😭😭😭

[chaoticfvckingdisaster]

Hi is this anything

[trainer-from-unova]

[phoenixes-and-wizards]

no because it’s really really important to me that in a world where we’re so used to the heroes punching and shooting their way to victory, thunderbolts* went out of its way to show us that the void is still very much a part of bob, and bob is their friend, so they’re going to accept every facet of who he is and give him a soft place to land, even if that means they’ll have to be the ones to pull him back from the darkness every single time. because that’s what friends family will do for each other, no questions asked.

[rummikubcube]

What if you were a METH ADDICT, who came from an ABUSIVE HOUSEHOLD, and then you decided that you wanted to TRY AND BE GOOD (OR/AND FIND NEW DRUGS), so you went to a shady lab in MALAYSIA, and then you kinda DIED, and then you RESUSCITATED with GODLIKE POWERS, and some shady Russian blonde presented you with ADOPTION PAPERS, and saved you from your crushing evil alter ego depression with the POWER OF FRIENDSHIP-

[whitedarkmoonflower]

"Bob..." Sebastian Stan as Bucky Barnes // Thunderbolts* 2025

[lenoredovescovey]

[redundantz]

[hurtspideyparker]

Logan and Wade in the Honda Odyssey, a sex metaphor:

The fighting was purely for a release of energy and emotion since they regenerate

The constant penetration of weapons over and over, Logan smiling in satisfaction during the penetration

"I take it all back, the Honda Odyssey fucks hard. Too bad you don't, needle-dick" "oh we're just getting started bub" they're literally flirting.

The grunting, panting, yelling.

Come hither hand motions, asking for more, the rocking of the car

Constantly on top of each other, rolling around, switching positions

Staying in the car. There is no reason to fight inside the car/keep going back in, but it forces their proximity and cars are a common place for sex

Their bodily fluids sprayed all over each other and the vehicle (blood... or)

There was a time skip.

Seatbelt bondage

Exhausting themselves and sleeping next to each other afterwards

In summary; they totally fucked in that thing

[livingfandomly]

Going from “bob is looking at their memories and is going to use them against each character later” to “omg bob saw those memories and realised he’s not alone at all and there are other people in the world who he could actually relate to” was wild coz I didn’t expect it until I was already crying.

[wolviestars]

leg over logan's shoulder????

[swattingredwing]

the first time i cried in thunderbolts was when they all worked together to save that woman from the chunk of a building

superhero movies are about people who have the ability to help people and choose to do so

that isn’t all there is but i think the mcu has gotten so focused in the weeds of the multiverse and inner group politics and whatever that they forgot that the reason we watch superhero movies is because we want to watch good guys fight bad guys, but more importantly, we want to watch them help people because that’s why they fight the bad guys in the first place