#nb because this is the 'piss on the poor' website

[sixth-light]

Not adding this onto the post that keeps crossing my dash because it's not really relevant to that discussion, but: anytime the phrase 'nobody was living there' comes up as a form of justification for something or other, it is worth keeping in mind that in literally the last ten thousand years or so the only major areas of the world to have been settled by humans for the first time are Greenland, Iceland, Aotearoa New Zealand, and Madagascar. (We shall not count Antarctica on the grounds that nobody lives there permanently or is ever likely to.) Everywhere else has been inhabited by humans for tens of thousands of years. Even when Homo sapiens left Africa our ancestors were encountering (checks notes) our other ancestors, Neanderthals and Denisovans, not to mention other human species now extinct.

The myth of the unpopulated frontier, open for expansion, is just that: a myth, and one that generally serves a specific purpose in terms of justifying settler-colonialism. The question the phrase 'nobody was living there' demands is - who are you calling 'nobody'?

[eeveeprincessxd]

Enby weighing in here: in theory I agree with the basic statements of thebeardedsir. It shouldn’t be considered offense to JUST ask someone their pronouns, because yeah, the alternative IS being misgendered. I just spent like a whole month dealing with being “Miss MyNameHere” at a summer job because 1) I don’t have the stereotypical androgynous NB look, 2) as a result most folks didn’t even think it was necessary to ask my pronouns, 3) I was working with kids in a workplace environment where “political” topics were considered taboo so I wasn’t even sure if I was ALLOWED to clarify that sort of thing to them, and 4) I’d be at a different location every week so correcting my coworkers quickly started to feel like a waste of time and energy when I’d just have to start over a few days later. I would’ve LOVED to have been asked about my pronouns so I could’ve had that clarified on day one and felt recognized at my job. So yeah, in THEORY I agree with what thebeardedsir said.

In practice, however? He’s shown once again that we are on the “piss on the poor” website, by ironically demonstrating that something he admitted would be a problem was something he didn’t even notice was the specific circumstance the original post was talking about.

“I realize that gender non conforming people may experience something akin to a micro aggression when certain people ask the question certain ways”

Oh, you mean like say… flinching at the mere sight of you as they ask about it? Or with a tone and expression that betrays the judgmental transphobic attitude of “holy shit is that a fucking tranny”? Or claiming to ask everyone their pronouns only for the guy next to them to reveal that no, this is actually a special treatment because they “clocked” you? Because news flash, those are the ways we’re talking about the question being asked. Nobody here is taking issue with the general action of asking a person’s pronouns. What we have beef with is these disingenuous transphobes who can’t even do a good enough job faking politeness on the subject to hide their disdain and their stereotypical assumptions about us. I’m not gonna tell thebeardedsir to shut up about trans issues because he’s a cis guy and his opinions are therefore automatically invalid. But I AM going to tell him to read posts more carefully and think about his responses before just going off about them. Critical thinking is a skill, and it doesn’t hurt to remind people when theirs is faltering, but you’ve gotta give constructive feedback, or nothing will be learned.