#oops i already forgot the name of the song

[operaticsk3leton]

better in the dark

prorev!frank iero x reader

word count: 1.3k

tags: smut, prorev!frank iero, blindfold kink, quickie, piv, no pronouns but afab described, light degradation (m receiving), sub!frank iero, dom!reader, unprotected sex, creampie oops, begging, pwp tbh, anything else i forgot

a/n: this is rlly just for me honestly. blindfolded frank iero consumes me on a daily!! title isn’t inspired by the song i js didn’t know what else to title it. also not proofread but enjoy xo romie ❦

you don’t think he even intended for it to get you all worked up. it was just the way he played that night, deft fingers moving across the fretboard, sweat rolling off him in droplets and mouth hung open like it is whenever he’s moaning beneath you— all while blindfolded. the excitement of his performance went straight to between your thighs, heat blooming in your stomach; you wanted that show over right then and there.

as soon as the first set had ended and frank walked towards the wings of the stage away from view of the screaming fans, you yanked him towards an empty room, any room.

you find an abandoned dressing room and tug him inside, locking the door behind you. before he can get a word out, ask you what’s wrong, your lips crash against his. the force of the searing kiss causes him to stumble backwards against a wall and you swallow his surprised gasps and sharp grunts of pleasure as you nip at his bottom lip.

frank’s hands are already all over you, fingers settling on your hips to pull you flush against him before drifting down to squeeze your ass. his lips move against yours like if he stops kissing you he might cease to exist.

just as soon as it began, though, it’s over, and he can’t help but give a pitchy whine in protest. you have no idea how much time he has before the second set, but you know it’s not enough.

he still has that blindfold tied around his neck.

you lead him to a small couch and push him onto it. you climb onto his lap immediately, straddling him as he gazes up at you like you’ve already made him wait too long. a pair of inked up hands find your waist, pushing you down onto his semi. frank groans at the stimulation, his features screwing up all pretty as your hips start rolling in small circles.

in one movement, the white cloth is back over his eyes, a breathless slew of, “fuck, yes, please,” spurring you on.

blessedly, you palm him through his jeans, frank’s cock stiffening further and straining against the denim as you torture him. he only wishes he could see you, but the thrill of not knowing where you’ll touch him next is dizzying. “god, such a whore, aren’t you? so greedy, always taking whatever i give you, huh? they can probably hear you moaning like some slut, y’know that?” you coo, grinning as he squirms beneath you.

“uh-huh, yours, your slut- fuck— c’mon, please baby…” he babbles, unable to string together an intelligent sentence. “just— please, just fuck me already.”

frank’s whines only get louder, needier; in a moment of mercy, you make quick work of his jeans. he lifts his hips to help you as you yank the denim and his boxers down until they rest at his thighs. his cock springs out, already leaking precum from his slit, his tip a flushed shade of pink. your mouth waters at the sight and he shudders as you wrap your fingers around his length, giving him a few good strokes.

you get rid of your jeans entirely, tugging your soaked-through panties to the side. he starts getting impatient as you line the head of his cock up with your entrance, but a choked moan claws its way from his throat as he feels you sink down on him harshly.

you hiss softly at the subtle sting, but it soon turns to pleasure as you take a second to get used to him. no matter how many times you have him inside you, filling you up just right, you’ll always be stunned at just how big frank is. you lift your hips, hands settling on his chest for balance, before slamming them back down against his own. your name falls from his tongue desperately, “yesyesyes, fuck, baby, you’re so—” you cut him off with another sharp movement, earning a whine as a reward.

you soon find a sloppy rhythm, your pussy gulping up his perfect cock like that’s all it was made to do. his head tilts back against the couch, unable to do much else but writhe and moan since he can’t even see you. your hands use his shoulders to keep steady, soft moans coming from your lips as your walls clench around him maddeningly— god, you’re too much for him.

frank’s lack of vision allows him to focus solely on the feeling of you fucking yourself on his dick mindlessly. the wet squelch your cunt makes each time you sink back onto him is awe-worthy, and soon enough you’re trailing hot, open-mouthed kisses on his jaw and neck. you suck purplish-pinkish spots onto the flesh, tongue laving over the bruises once you’re through with your work. each press of your lips against his throat drives him crazy, the scent of your perfume invading his senses and making it all so much more intense.

he’s so deep, so so deep that it’s almost painful as his tip kisses your cervix, each time his hips jerk forward hitting a new angle. every twitch of his cock inside you makes you see stars, your pussy clenching spasming as if sucking him back in, needing to keep him merged with you. heaving and thighs quivering, your quick movements come to a lull as you try to regain your breath.

you take the time to just watch as his brows furrow in confusion at how you’ve slowed down, a pitiful whimper from his lips making you all sorts of hot. “wanna cum, baby, please can i? i’m so close, please, need to…” you’d let him plead, make him beg just to get your approval, but a sharp knock on the door and a ten minute warning from one of the crew has you slapping a hand over his mouth. once the steps fade into silence, your pace picks back up, even faster, unforgiving, as you rush for time.

you didn’t think frank could get needier, but somehow he has, his whines getting higher in pitch while his hands start helping you with each brutal slam of your hips against his. his grasp is tight enough that you know it’ll leave pretty bruises along the smooth skin. you could deny him his orgasm, make him go back out there all worked up and frustrated as his release becomes a distant memory, but…

“baby,” he drawls, and it’s enough to rid you of your cruel intentions.

pressure builds low in your tummy, your breathing becoming erratic as your impending climax is just within reach. to your shared delight, you use his dick selfishly, sinking down on his throbbing length with reckless abandon. his tone becomes unmistakably bratty as he begs once more to cum. “please— need it so bad. you’re being mean, please just let me cum, baby, please!”

you nod, forgetting he’s still blind. “only because you asked nicely.”

at that, frank goes rigid, mouth falling open in a loud moan as his features become almost agonized. his orgasm is sweet, white-hot bliss, tears welling in his eyes as he screws them shut beneath the blind fold. warm ropes of his seed spurt inside your aching pussy, the sight of his pleasure enough to tip you over the edge, too. your muscles tense up, thighs shaking as your orgasm washes over you in waves, leaving you breathless and reeling.

a blinding light, then frank is met with the sight of you, flushed and looking well-fucked with a woozy smile tugging at the corners of your mouth. he can’t help but chuckle and pull you in for a sloppy kiss, muttering thank you’s against your lips. you climb off his lap hurriedly, remembering that he needs to get on stage soon. you’re both cleaned up and dressed just as a yell of his name is heard through the door, thankfully.

exhausted, yet somehow even more worked up than he was 20 minutes ago, he gives you one final peck before running off. you laugh as you get a glance at gerard’s unamused expression. next time, you might as well fuck on stage.

[kxsagi]

why is sae kinda wave to earth coded like

“𝐬𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐨𝐧𝐬”

a/n: he is and for that reason, i wrote angst. oops! (trying my best to ignore the picture but the honkers...)

okay but reader’s part hurt me a lot even though i wrote it so sae’s pov is right after and it has a happy ending 🥰

you never told him. and maybe that was your first kindness to him. 

because what could he have possibly done with a love like yours? the kind that clings, stubborn and unshakable, even in silence. the kind that doesn’t ask for anything back – not time, not warmth, not even a glance. just to exist near him was enough, you used to tell yourself, though it broke you open in the quietest ways. 

sae itoshi stood at the center of your world, unknowingly, like the sun, brilliant and blinding. and you? you were just a season. temporary. fleeting. passing through. 

you met in the blur of youth, back when dreams were louder than doubt. he was already distant, aloof, eyes fixed on a future that didn’t have room for unnecessary things like feelings. you, though? you felt everything. all at once. and maybe too much. 

still, he never pushed you away. you were kind, and he noticed. you listened, and he noticed. you stayed even when he didn’t make it easy, and he noticed that, too. 

but he never looked. not the way you wished he would. 

you remember once, on an autumn evening, watching him through the window of the library. the wind carried golden leaves like soft confessions, and he sat alone, eyes glazed over a textbook he wouldn’t read. he looked tired. he always looked tired. 

and all you wanted was to touch his hand. to whisper that he didn’t have to be alone. that someone, you, was willing to love him without condition. 

but you didn’t. because you knew better. 

because love, real love, isn’t always about being with someone. sometimes, it’s about standing on the other side of the street and watching them walk away, hoping they find light even if it’s not through you. 

so, you became a shadow. a quiet supporter. you cheered for him in the silence of your heart. lit candles on days he didn’t know mattered. remembered the little things he forgot about himself. 

and when he won, when the world started screaming his name, you clapped the loudest, even if it was behind closed doors. 

you told your friends you were proud. you told yourself you were fine. but you weren’t. 

because loving someone you can’t have is a slow kind of dying. like winter creeping in too early, catching you without a coat. and every time you thought you’d moved on, some piece of him would find you again – in a song, a headline, the memory of his voice. 

still, you never blamed him. not once. if anything, you blamed yourself. for not being stronger. for feeling too much. for wanting too badly to be loved back in the exact way you loved him. 

and maybe that’s why you disappeared first. 

slowly, like the fading of seasons. no goodbyes. no questions. just a quiet drift. he probably didn’t notice. or maybe he did, and decided not to ask. either way, you never came back. 

but even now, years later, as the world keeps turning and time keeps pulling you further from him, you still think of him when the cherry blossoms bloom. you still light a candle on his birthday. you still close your eyes when you hear his voice in post-match interviews, just to pretend he’s speaking to you. 

and you still pray. you pray that he’s happy. that someone’s taking care of him. that his heart has softened with time. you pray he never finds out how much you loved him, because if he knew, he might carry that weight. and you want him to fly. you want him to be free. 

so you let him go. and that was your last act of love. 

but oh, if you could have been by his side… you would’ve given him everything. your life. your warmth. your seasons. 

your love. 

𝐬𝐚𝐞’𝐬 𝐩𝐨𝐯

he always knew. 

maybe not at first. maybe not when you sat beside him in class, humming under your breath and passing him notes he barely glanced at. not when you waited for him after practice with an extra drink, not saying much, just offering your presence like a silent apology for his exhaustion. 

but eventually, he noticed. 

it was in the way you looked at him the same years later, not like he was a star, but like he was still human, even after the world started turning him into something else. you saw the boy behind the brilliance. you saw the parts he buried. 

and he didn’t know what to do with that. 

because sae itoshi was taught that love came with expectations. that closeness led to dependence. that if you opened the door even a little, people would walk in and never leave. 

but you didn’t push. you never asked for anything. not his time, not his attention, not even his affection. you loved him in the quietest way possible. and that terrified him. 

because he wanted to reach back. he wanted to hold your hand in that library. he wanted to say your name without sounding like he was choking on it. he wanted to tell you that when things felt too heavy, thinking of you made it a little easier to breathe. 

but he was afraid. afraid that if he touched something so good, he’d ruin it. 

so he stayed still. and you drifted. 

you started smiling less. started saying less. and one day, you were gone, just like that. no explanation. no fight. you disappeared the same way you came into his life: gently, and without warning. 

and he hated himself for it. 

he watched you vanish through the cracks of time, like water slipping through cupped hands. and the worst part? he let you. because that’s what he thought you wanted. but it wasn’t. 

months passed. then years. the fame got louder. the lights got brighter. but his world got smaller. and when things quieted, when he was alone in hotel rooms with aching legs and an emptier chest, he thought of you. 

he thought of the what if’s. the if only’s. the maybe, if i had just… 

and one day, something broke. 

he saw a fan holding a sign with your favorite quote. some poetic nonsense he used to roll his eyes at. but this time, he didn’t look away. 

this time, he picked up his phone. 

you hear his voice before you see him. deep. cautious. hesitant in a way you’ve never heard before. 

“i was an idiot,” he says. no greeting. just truth. “i knew. the whole time. and i was scared, but… i never stopped thinking about you.” 

your heart stops. 

“i still think about you,” he continues, softer. “every season, every year, it’s always you.” 

you turn slowly to look out your window. he’s standing there, in the rain, holding nothing but his phone and something raw in his eyes. 

“so if you’ll let me… i want to try. for real this time. no silence. no distance. just me. and you.” 

he steps closer. your breath catches. 

“you once said nothing. now let me say everything.” 

you say yes. and this time, you stay. 

he gives you his winters, quiet and warm, bundled in scarves and late-night movies. he gives you his springs, soft and clumsy, filled with new routines and relearning how to be loved. he gives you his summers, loud and golden, messy with beach trips and laughter and sunscreen kisses. he gives you his autumns, slow and nostalgic, where the leaves fall like old fears and make room for something new. 

and when he looks at you now, he doesn’t feel afraid. he feels home. 

because love, real love, was never about perfection. it was about showing up. 

and this time, sae itoshi chose to stay. for you. for him. for all the seasons you still had left to share. 

© 𝐤𝐱𝐬𝐚𝐠𝐢

[velmalav]

The Giver - Frank Langdon pt. IV

masterlist

day one // night one // day two

night two - f.l.

synopsis: being the selfless person you are, you agree to travel to a 3-day conference with your biggest competition - dr. langdon. part 3 of I don't know how many yet :-)

warnings: cursing, oops there's only one bed, enemies to lovers, ANGST!!!!

Sometimes you just need to dance.

The gears in my brain haven’t stopped turning since I left Langdon in the lobby. Focusing in an academic setting has never been a problem for me; it’s when I thrive the most. Today was an exception. Notebook splayed open across my lap, pen clicked an excessive number of times in preparation, I kept reminding myself that I needed to take notes for Mel. Another task I’d been determined to complete to make me feel less shitty about making us late. And yet by the end of the eighth and final session, I hadn’t written one single word down.

This isn’t about the startling attraction I’ve realized I have for him; it’s the fact that somewhere from the airport to the hotel to the conference, I started to care about him. And it doesn’t make sense because he’s given me nothing to change how I feel. We’ve spent the entire trip arguing and avoiding each other. If seeing the man I hate naked one time is enough to alter my entire perspective on him, then I’m fucking doomed. And stupid.

But last night felt like we bonded. Yes, most of it out of spite, but somehow without noticing all these years, there’s always been a line to our games. We’ve never let it get in the way of our job and we’ve never actually hurt each other’s feelings. Until this morning. It took me crossing the line to find out there ever was one.

At some point, after waging war inside my head all day, my head started to pound. I was afraid to confront him, another thing I usually never hesitated to do. And so when a lovely ER nurse named Daisha made me aware of the mixer after the conference, I used it as a way to avoid the inevitable for just a little longer.

Theo, a senior resident like Langdon, also just happened to be another means of my avoidance. He was very forward, jumping from small talk to very transparent flirting to whisking me off to the dance floor. My entire aim of the night was to dance – my favorite coping skill – so I wasn’t reluctant to take his hand. In all honesty, it felt wrong. To dance with him. To flirt with him. I just don’t know why.

Well, at least I didn’t. Only half a song in, Theo’s arms around my waist and my fingers gripping into his shoulders, I lean my head back to shake my hair out. Just in time to spot Langdon pushing his way out. And it hits me. It’s the thought of him that’s making this feel wrong. I straighten up, pull away from Theo. He’s confused, trying to lean closer so he presumably can ask what’s wrong when I, like Langdon, start to push my way free.

I spin in Theo’s direction once I’m off the dance floor, giving a sheepish wave before booking it after Langdon.

.

The air is thick and filled to the brim with tension when I reach the hallway outside our hotel room. Langdon walks so fucking fast that he’s already comfortably leaned against the hotel wall, arms crossed with his neck craned upwards. His eyes are closed and by his expression, he seems to be in deep contemplation.

“Langdon,” I call out as I approach, holding up the key card he absolutely forgot there was only one of. His eyes drift open, but slowly, like he’s dreading my presence.

He’s silent, turns so he’s leaning beside the door. He avoids making eye contact. Having taken the hint, I simply unlock the door and let him enter first. Again, he does so without a word. But I can feel that whatever he was thinking about is laced with hostility.

Now that I’m alone with him, I have no idea what to say. Where to start. What to even bring up. But I have to say something, I have to cut this tension.

“Sorry about the keycard. I, uh, forgot to remind you that there was only one,” I say gently.

Standing on the other side of the bed, Langdon appears surprised by my words. I’m not sure I’ve ever apologized to him before. I never thought I’d need to or want to for that matter.

“It’s fine,” he says tightly, neck veins protruding and eyes fixated on everything but me. He begins to gather clothes to change into but there is no relief from his response. If anything, it’s starting to rile me up. I have a terrible habit of getting angry when I’m anxious, and I can feel it simmering underneath my skin.

“Langdon,” I repeat. It’s not a question but in the meek way I say it, it kind of sounds like one.

Nothing. Only the shuffling of bags can be heard. And fuck it’s hot in here all of a sudden.

“Listen, I know you’re pissed about this morning. And even though it’s hard to believe, I am actually really sorry. I should’ve woken you up,” I bite out, shutting my eyes. I’m fidgeting with the ring on my middle finger, awaiting the venomous response I’m sure will follow.

“Oh, you mean when you purposefully sabotaged my medical career? And then lied to my face like it was one of your games? Yeah, I’m still pissed,” Langdon snaps. His words are loud like he just yelled them right in my ear. I open my mouth to fumble out whatever I can think of, but he’s not finished. “And, yeah, it’s hard to believe you’d ever feel fucking sorry about anything. Especially that. Because all you’ve ever done is think about yourself, and it’s just fucking gross.”

Another line crossed. Seeing as though I was the first one to do so, I try and take the words in stride. But they keep beating in my ears like they’re on a timer. And instead of breaking down, my anger rushes in full force.

“Fuck you,” my voice scares me. Tears collect in the corners of my eyes, but I refuse to let them fall. It’s those words that finally get Langdon to look at me. It doesn’t take him long to realize he’s taken it too far.

I toss my purse on the bed and start towards the bathroom, prepared to lock myself in there for the night. But just as I reach it, Langdon’s hand is yanking me toward him. It’s not aggressive but firm, and his other hand moves to rest upon the top of the door frame so we’re facing each other.

It’s clear he hasn’t thought about his next words because we stand there glaring at each other for what feels like hours. Both breathing heavily, unable to break eye contact. I speak first.

“Say whatever you want, but you don’t know anything about me,” I seethe. “All you see is competition, someone who reminds you of everything you wish you had. And you know what, maybe I don’t feel fucking sorry.” I pull my arm out of his grasp.

Langdon flicks his attention between both of my eyes, trying to read anything he can underneath the coldness of my stare. I’m hoping he can’t see the devastation lurking just behind it.

“All I see is someone I don’t want to know,” he breathes. His voice has lost its edge, a vulnerability breaking through without his permission.

“Wow,” I reply softly, matching his tone.

“Wow,” Langdon mimics, more incredulously. “Now why don’t you go find that dude at the bar and find a place to stay for the night?” out of all of the things he has said to me tonight, this is the sentence he says with the most aggression. Like we’re competing again. Because despite all of the reasons he could be upset with me, the sight of me with another man is what hurt him the most.

I’m not even sure he realizes what he’s just given away. Finally, the relief I’ve been begging to feel all day comes. And I start laughing.

Langdon’s face falls in confusion, still leaning toward me with his hand on the doorframe. I put a hand over my mouth to stifle the laugh, “You’re fucking jealous.”

“I’m not jealous,” he states in a way that seems a whole lot like he’s trying to convince himself, too.

“Oh, we’ve said enough tonight. The least you could do is just admit it,” I push. “I mean, I knew you’d be mad about this morning, it was shitty, and I felt terrible. And maybe a little about the keycard. And I definitely know having to spend half your weekends this year at conferences isn’t helping either. But this mad?” He tries to interrupt, but I refuse to let him, holding up my hand in protest. “It all makes sense now. You saw me with that guy and now you’re fucking jealous.”

Langdon shifts uncomfortably on his feet, propping his other hand on the opposite door frame so he’s towering over me. He glances off past me, tongue swiping past his lips. He’s thinking hard about something. Then his head drops so I can only see the top of his forehead.

The silence is killing me slowly. My smile starts to fade in the thought that I might’ve gotten it all wrong. That he’s actually just pissed about this morning, and now I’ve made it all out to be one big joke. As he lifts his head, probably ready to lay into me again, I sputter out, “I-Frank, I’m sorry. I thought—”

Langdon’s hands drop from the doorframe, and within a second one hand curves around my cheek, the other gripping the back of my neck. My heart has just enough time to sputter once before his mouth is on mine.

My body relaxes into his touch like it’s second nature. I wind a hand into his side, jerking him closer until our chests are one. Senses flooded with only him, his touch, the sound of his uneven breathing, his smell. His mouth drags along mine, and I continue gripping him as to fight the moment we have to come up for air.

But it happens. We breath into each other’s mouths, reveling in the heat existing between us. Eyes shut; I prod at his lips with my own as if trying to find him in the darkness. His one tendril of hair grazes my nose.

“Fuck,” Langdon breathes. I open my eyes to be met with his immediately, harsh blue eyes penetrating me like I’m the first thing he’s ever seen. His eyes half-lidded, he dips down to rejoin our lips. With every second that passes, I crave more of him, wanting him so intensely I’m not sure my heart will remember to beat. I open my mouth, a wordless invitation to have more of me. We stay there, tongues competing against each other, a familiar dance that almost makes me laugh.

“So I was right,” I sigh into his mouth. “Definitely jealous.”

Langdon breaks the kiss, narrowing his eyes as his nose bumps against mine. “You are so fucking lucky you were, too,” he whispers, sending a tremor through my body. He gazes at my lips, temptation simmering in his expression. I anticipate more only for him to break out into a sinister smile. “Too bad we have an early morning tomorrow. Wouldn’t want to be late.”

Before I can protest or even muster of the courage to beg him to touch me again, he spins into the bathroom and shuts the door. And it hits me when the shower turns on. He played me – this is his revenge for me not waking him this morning.

A temporary truce, one that I know won’t even last through the night.

day three

[makeyoumine69]

Spit In My Face

PAIRING: Sugar Daddy!Patrick Bateman x Fem!Reader

SUMMARY: Fashion Week is in full swing in New York City and Patrick Bateman doesn't miss the chance to show you the world of luxury and beauty. So, he invites you to attend the fashion show with him. Through the chain of events that unfold there, you will see a new side of Mr. Bateman that you never knew existed.

TAGS: Angsty romance, smut, toxic behavior, gaslighting, cheating, misogyny, hurt/comfort, seduction, swearing, flirting, sensual kisses & touches, jealousy, implications of self harm & panic attacks, (almost) character death, oral sex (reader receiving), fingering, rough sex, finger sucking, spanking, biting, manhandling, choking, orgasm control, dry humping, nipple play, multiple orgasms, overstimulation, body worship, Daddy kink, Praise kink, pet names, dirty talk, Service!Dom!Patrick Bateman being an asshole (again).

WORDS: 21k (oops)

SONG REC: ThxSoMch - Spit In My Face

A/N: Hey guys! It took me a year to finally finish this and I decided to post all the parts together since most of you probably forgot what happened in the previous ones (I'll delete the old posts). I did some extra editing before posting and I hope you like it and I'm happy to get back to writing and soon I'll be rebooting the Cupcake series as I've already started working on prequels. Love you all!

Fashion, grace, money, wealth, these were the words running through your head as you rode in the taxi, and you couldn't believe Patrick had just convinced you to go to the goddamn Dior boutique. Not to mention the upcoming fashion show you were going to together, which was an actual nightmare for you and your nervous system.

“I really can’t understand. Why me?” You asked Bateman, turning in his direction to see him looking through the window, with his headphones on. And of course, he didn’t hear you. 

All you could do was give him a shy tap on the shoulder. You heard the loud beats of rock music as he opened one of his ears and turned to face you. "What?"

His slightly annoyed intonation almost discouraged you from repeating your question. "I'm just wondering why you decided to invite me to this fashion show when you have much better options." 

You watched him frown, and before you continued, you already knew what Patrick was going to say: "Cupcake, I've told you several times. I want to show you the beauty of being rich. I bet you've never seen so many fabulous people in one place."

Sighing a little sadly, you fixed your coat to distract yourself from the burning anger in your chest. "I've had enough of the rich snobs in our company and…I’m not a fan of all these 'luxurious’ things, you know…”

With a small chuckle, Bateman removed his headphones completely, quickly checking his haircut in the window's reflection. 

"Of course you're not. How can you be a fan of things you can't afford?" He stated before trying to hug your shoulders, but when he saw your intense expression, he just gently put his palm on your knee.

"Money is not happiness," you cast a serious look at him, brushing his hand away from your leg. "Can you call yourself a happy man?"

Perplexed, Patrick knitted his eyebrows, as if your question had caught him off guard —you have never seen him so lost before and that was really strange. Fidgeting in his place, Bateman was certainly about to replay something when you heard the raspy taxi driver’s voice:

“We’ve arrived.”

"Thank you!" You responded before quickly getting out of the cab without waiting for Patrick to pay for your ride.

Obviously, you were upset and pissed off because of his endless snobbish dialogues about rich people, money and how much his regular suit cos—tnone of this really interested you, would he ever understand that?

As soon as you were outside, you felt a stiff wind blowing through your hair, ruffling it and making your mischievous locks cover your face. Quickly, you brushed them away and raised your eyes to the beautiful sign that read "Dior" in large letters; so stylish, so plush—just the way he liked it.

"Are you going to stand here forever?" Bateman scolded behind your back, his loud footsteps forcing you to spin around. 

"I'm so amazed, I can't even move," you sarcastically sneered, staring at the window of the boutique. "The aura of richness has just overwhelmed me."

"How witty," Bateman almost applauded you, his lips curling into a cheeky grin as he came closer, his muscular arms wrapped around your waist. "Come on, let's go inside." With a light push on your back, he induced you to move forward, his arms never left your little form. 

When you finally reached the entrance of the store, Patrick gallantly opened the door in front of you and looked at you from above, his eyes glowing with an unfamiliar tenderness.

"Much obliged..." You stammered as he somehow managed to grab your ass, stroking it and squeezing your buttock a little through your coat. Embarrassed, you turned to face him, but Bateman just smiled in his usual smug way. 

"My pleasure." He murmured in your ear before letting you go.

Once inside the boutique, you heard someone greeting Patrick with undisguised excitement:

"Mr. Bateman! It's so nice to see you again!  Welcome to Dior, we are so happy to help you."

'Again, huh?' You chuckled to yourself, turning your gaze to a side and wondering about the number of his visits and how many girls had been here before; Bateman’s face changed almost immediately as if he noticed your reaction.

“Thank you for the warm welcome, Mr. Graham,” you could definitely hear some tense notes in his tone. “You look great as always!”

The guy let out a little giggle; he seemed to enjoy the compliments as much as your yuppie boy. “Not as perfect as you!” he pointed his both index fingers at Patrick, and now was his turn to grin from being praised. “How can I help you?”

“Uh, I need a dress for…” he paused before staring at you, his eyes gliding over your completely relaxed expression. “For my good friend, but she doesn’t really know what she likes,” ‘good friend, with whom he slept almost every day. Nice shot, Bateman.' “Don’t cha, baby?” While saying that, Patrick groped your cheek, pinching it a bit.

Mr. Graham, who was supposed to be a local stylist, gave two of you a suspicious glare, and only then did Patrick understand what he was doing, pulling his hand away as if it had been burned. 

"Well, if the young lady doesn't mind, we can try something to your taste, Mr. Bateman," the stylist confirmed, examining you like a statue. "What do you think?"

"Great idea," Patrick exclaimed, pulling you into his arms to take off your coat. You almost fell into his embrace, whimpering as he 'accidentally' touched your boobs, squeezing them gently. 'Fuck, why should he be so obnoxious?' "I can't wait to see my Cupcake in one of these beautiful dresses." He whispered before leaving a tiny peck on your neck.

"That's very sweet of you, but..." you murmured, looking into his hazel eyes. "I don't think I'll fit into those dresses."

"Don't worry, honey." Bateman winked at you and gave you a quick slap on your butt to nudge you toward Mr. Graham, whose smile widened the longer he watched the two of you together.

“Please, follow me.”

Trying to distract yourself from all the bad thoughts, you just did what you were told and moved along countless hangers with new dresses. The further you got away from Patrick, the more insecure you became, and that strange feeling made your whole body shiver like from a cold shower.

“So, which color do you want to try on first? Maybe something dark?” the man asked you, sliding his hand across the beautiful fabric of some dress nearby. “Dark blue or dark red…Or even black?”

"I really like the black color, it goes with almost everything."

Mr. Graham chuckled amusedly and handed you a black cocktail dress, which of course was very short. Apparently Patrick didn't like long dresses or skirts, you already knew that, but that didn't mean you were happy about it.

“Mm-mh, and I think this one can fit too,” he gave you another dark blue dress before adding. “I still recommend you to have a look at our new collection, maybe you’ll find something interesting.”

“Maybe you’re right,” you sighed and smiled sincerely for the first time of the day. "Those amazing dresses I saw when we just entered are from a new collection?"

“Yes, Miss.”

"I'll check them out. And… thank you, Mr. Graham." Excited, you smiled again, and then you strolled away, a pile of dresses in your hands.

Once you reached the place you had been before, you heard multiple voices—one of them definitely belonged to Patrick while another one seemed to be unknown to you.

"What are you doing here?" You peeked out from behind the hangers to see a beautiful blonde girl, her face literally glowing with enthusiasm. "I'm so glad to see you, it's been a while." You didn't even have to look to know what she did next as the loud pecking sound echoed in your ears as if you had been hit with something hard.

The blonde left a small kiss on Patrick's cheek before he replied. "Good to see you too, Meredith."

“Are you here alone?”

“Mm-mhhm,” Bateman looked around and when he didn’t spot you, he added almost emotionlessly. “Yeah, you can say that.”

An instant pain burned in your chest, causing your hands to cling to the dress you were holding. Breathing heavily, you were about to send everything to hell and just leave, but for some reason, you decided to listen to their conversation, maybe you would learn something else about yourself being nothing but an empty place.

"So, are you going to the fashion show this weekend?" She asked cautiously, as if testing his line.

"Sure," they looked into each other's eyes for a while. "You know, I never miss things like that."

The way she giggled, forced you to close your ears from cringe, but that unpleasant sound kept bouncing in your head.

"Do you have a date or not?"

"Why do you ask?" Bateman retorted in a stern but concerned tone.

"I just... I thought maybe we could go together?" Flirtatiously, she pulled him closer, pretending to fix his coat.

"I'm sorry, but the answer is no." Frowning, he quickly took her hand away.

Ashamed, she stepped back and stalled. "You could just say you already have someone to go with and…"

Patrick scowled in irritation, cutting her off. "I'd still say 'no' even if I didn't…"

"Miss, did you find something you like?" Mr. Graham's sudden voice made you jerk and drop the super expensive dress with a thud.

It felt like all eyes were on you at that moment, and you didn't really know what to do other than quickly pick up the dress and act naturally. “God, I’m so sorry…I can be so clumsy sometimes!” You apologized, trying to ignore Bateman’s intense gaze. 

"Don't worry, Miss… it's not a problem!" The stylist assured you, matching his words with reassuring gestures.

"I'll pay for everything,” Patrick pronounced it so calmly and with absolute confidence, as he moved in your direction. “Have you finished?” 

First, you cast a confused glance at him, and then you looked at Meredith, her mad stare of disbelief almost making you laugh. “I think so,” you murmured, watching him getting closer. “I even got some of the new collection.”

“Ahh, is it so?” he teased, standing face to face with you. “Come on, let Daddy see what you’ve got.”

With that said, Patrick leaned over to your lips, and you let him pull you into a deep kiss, which was pretty surprising—your own behavior almost scared you, as you didn’t even care about people watching you making out. Deftly, he grabbed your waist to lift you up, but your audible protest compelled him to stop.

“Pat-Patrick…” you whispered against his mouth. “P-please, don’t forget where we are…”

“I know, I know,” he snickered softly, hiding his face in the curve of your neck. “I just missed my Cupcake so much.”

With a dull grin on your face, you pulled away from him to look into his dark brown eyes. "Really?" After you asked that, you glanced at the blonde girl behind his back, who was now talking to a middle-aged woman, probably the assistant.

“Time literally stopped for me when you left.” 

'What a beautiful flattery.'

After a while, you changed into the next dress because all the previous options didn't get Bateman's attention, even though you really liked them. You were struggling with a clasp when you heard him whine in anticipation.

“Baby, did you fall asleep in there?”

“Almost ready!” You blurted out before fixing the dress straps on your shoulders.

And then you walked out of the dressing room to the circular runway, and yes, this boutique had a special VIP area with a fucking runway.

"Finally, my favorite style," Patrick flattered, sitting in the leather chair and holding a glass of mineral water with a little lime. "Mm-mm, this dress outlines your tits so perfectly, not gonna lie, I like it."

A bit humiliated, you were constantly fixing the hem of the dress as it was too short for you, especially when Bateman was looking at you so vigilantly, making you feel yourself like a picture in some art gallery.

"Baby, turn around and…" he paused, crossing his long legs and pressing a finger to his lips. "Stop crawling! Square your shoulders and straighten your back!"

You turned around, unable to hide your sadness. "I… I don't feel comfortable in this. It's too short," you glanced at his annoyed face, wondering if you should continue. "I'm almost naked!"

"But that's the point!" Patrick tilted his hand to the side and was silent for quite a while, clearly thinking about something. "You know what, Cupcake?"

“What?”

"I'll be honest, this dress is amazing, but… unfortunately not on you," he scoffed before taking a sip of water. "It's not a problem, honey. Just take it as motivation to be better."

Biting your lip, you'd be lying to yourself if you said you didn't try to hide your pain and resentment, but your voice sounded dejected anyway. “Of course… keep pretending that you didn’t expect this…”

Humming to himself, Bateman squinted his eyes and leaned on his knees. “Expected what?”

“That these slutty dresses wouldn't fit me,” you glared at him, your body was yearning to get rid of this dress as quickly as possible. “Goddamn, I have enough of this…I hope you enjoyed this little performance!”

After saying that, you turned around and went back into the dressing room. Trembling with rage, you didn't even care what would come next as the searing flame of injustice overtook your mind. No way would you allow anyone to treat you like that.

"Shit!" You cursed as you attempted to undo the fucking clasp on your back, but it didn't seem to work. 

"If you keep pulling like that, you'll tear it apart for sure," his unexpectedly gruff baritone shot through your back like an arrow. "Let me help you."

"No!" You almost screamed, turning sharply to face him. Your chest rose and fell so abruptly that you thought you would choke on the air.

Sneering, Bateman gently extended a hand as if you were a wild beast he planned to tame. “Cupcake,” he was getting closer, forcing you to walk backwards. “Tell me…what’s wrong?”

"What's wrong?" You kept stepping back until you suddenly bumped into the wall behind you. "Maybe you should ask yourself first?"

"I think you should stop pouting or you will get wrinkles," he tried to be nice to you, but it only made you more upset. "I don't think either one of us wants that to happen, am I right, honey?"

“Stop it, Patrick…”

“Mm-mhh, it’s just Patrick now?” You didn’t even notice that his massive figure was already towering over you, pressing you a little against the wall. “No ‘Daddy’ anymore?”

Possessively, Patrick strived to cup your face, but you flinched away from his touch, coaxing a warning growl to break from his perfectly shaped lips.

 “Can you just leave and let me change?”

“Jesus, (y/n)...you’re acting like a stubborn child!”

Panting, you leaned your hands against his firm chest to push him away a bit. "Do you really think I'm in the mood…after all the rude things you said?"

He chuckled, looking at you from above and giving you a feeling of being so small compared to him, you almost stopped breathing. “Rude things?” laughing again, Bateman trapped you between his arms as he put them from both sides of your head. “I always say what I think, there’s nothing special about it…”

"More likely, you always think only of yourself," your voice wavered, and you found it hard to breathe, as if he was sucking all the oxygen out of the air. "Let's just skip this, if you still want me to go with you..."

“No, I don’t need you to do me a favor.” Patrick shushed you with a finger, pressing it against your lips, leaving you trembling like a leaf. 

“And I don’t need your help!” You tried to break away, but he kept you in one place. 

“Oh, is that so, honey?” he crooned in a sweet tone, rubbing his nose against yours; his seductive aura was almost intoxicating, it was corrupting your mind stronger than anything else in this world. “Honestly, I just wanted to help you undo the clasp but now… now, I want more than that…”

With no delay, Bateman covered your mouth his heated one, wrapping his brawny hands around your quivering frame and spreading your legs with his knee. Suffocated, you didn’t react, feeling his hard bulge brushing against your mound—a muffled moan of sudden pleasure pierced through your bonded lips, sending chills down you spin; your cute reaction didn’t surprise him, but Patrick couldn’t hide his satisfied grin as his hands were already pulling down the straps of your dress. 

And only now, you desperately clawed at his shoulders, weakly pushing him back, not understanding that your attempts to fight him were only putting gasoline on a fire, encouraging him to sprawl you against the wall, pinning your hands against your head.

"P-Patrick!" The way you almost screamed his name made you both tremble with ravenous lust as you looked into each other's eyes, not really knowing if you wanted him to let you go or hold you forever.

Growling quietly, Bateman continued to move along your longing body, forcing you to hook your hip around his loin, so you could grind against his hard groin. “Feeling good, darling?”

'No, not good...no!'

“Yes-s! Mmm-mh…Daddy… ahh!” Oh God, that was the end. 

"Baby," he murmured in your ear, thrusting his firm thighs into yours and shamelessly groping your bottom. "Daddy doesn't like to see his sweet Cupcake upset."

"Maybe...n-next time Daddy will think more before he talks." You stammered from the beat of your heart. 

“Do ya want me to bite this little sharp tongue?” panting, Patrick punctuated his words with rough smacks on your butt, which could be surely heard outside the dressing room. “I’ll teach you how to behave.”

Smoothly, Bateman pulled down the top of your dress, letting your breasts to bounce out from it, and the next second his greedy mouth was already sucking on your taut nipple. 

"Mmm…Gosh." You arched your back as the last vestiges of your self-control seemed to disappear along with your ability to resist this man.

Switching between your engorged peaks, Patrick didn’t stop rubbing against your mound not even for a moment, your throbbing pussy was about to explode at any second. Thirsty, he tugged on your tip with a squelch, enjoying each little whine you made, but he still needed more.

“Turn around,” he urged briefly, licking his lips in hunger as he watched you bent over in front of him. “Oh-fuck, I can smell your sweet arousal… mmm,” snuggling into you, Bateman left a wet hickey on the back of your neck before he started to move down, peppering your exposed skin with hot sloppy kisses. “C’mon, Cupcake, spread your legs for me.”

As if hypnotized, you obeyed and before you even noticed, his long fingers were teasing your sensitive clit trough your so-fucking-wet panties. Clinging to the wall, you were about to moan when you sensed his big palm on your chin, his hot breathing was mercilessly burning the delicate skin of your throat while his rock-hard bulge was still pressed against your ass.

“Aa-aww, Daddy….mhm.” You muffled against your own hand before turning around to give him your most innocent look–he read it almost right away.

“So, you need my help?” bastard! – you almost said it out loud, but Bateman was faster as he slid his thumb into your mouth, and you started to suck it like medicine you couldn’t live without. “Ahh-look at ya… Such a little slutty girl, can’t function without Daddy’s finger inside her dirty mouth…”

Twitching under his massive weight, you could only think of his skilful digits playing with your pussy better than you ever wished for, damn you were already so close but it seemed like Partick's endless craving spurred him on to tear you apart completely.

With no words, Bateman knelt behind your back to pull up the hem of your dress, and soon you had to compress your lips so tightly, as loud nasty sounds were about to erupt from your fiery chest when he finally moved your underwear to the side and his plump lips covered your feverish cunt. 

“Oh-mmmy God,” tensed like a string, you didn’t know if you wanted to cry or to laugh, or all these things together from how his masterful tongue was pushing you over the edge. “Mmm-Patrick-” you suppressed another moan when he bit one of your buttocks before spreading them wide open to push two fingers inside your blushing pussy. “A-aah-Daddy, I’m so close… p-please!”

Patrick only purred something incoherently in response, as he continued to lick your engorged folds and pumping your tight hole with his experienced digits. His persistent ministrations made you totally lose your mind, and now you didn’t understand were you begging him to stop or to NEVER stop. 

When your legs shook in his grip, you heard his raspy snarl: “Not yet, Cupcake…Not yet!”

'And he just stopped, holy hell.'

Your miserable sobbing bounced against the walls of the dressing room as the coil in your lower belly was yearning for its release, it was literally itching so hard you were ready to scratch the wall with your nails if it could help you a bit.

“(Y/N), you can’t even imagine how much I want to leave you just like that,” Bateman hissed, and then you heard the unzipping sound which caused your knees to buckle. "But I want to get all your stupid thoughts about acting like a brat… out of your head!"

Abruptly, Patrick put your legs together and the next second you felt his leaking tip between your legs, brushing against your soaked folds and making your squirm from ecstasy. 

'This man have no barriers, he can reduce me to pieces so easily, like no one else, and I am sure he likes it.'

A small drops of sweat were running down his forehead as he watched his beefy cock slipping back and forth with a sleek sound; your overstimulated pussy was literally on fire.

“P-please…” You whimpered, bending ever lower to give him a better access to your spasming cunt. 

“If you want to cum, you have to move, slut.” Groaning, Bateman stood still with his hands wrapped tightly around your hips. Mesmerised, he watched you grinding on his huge dick as you desperately chased your release. At that moment, your languid, heavy breathing was all that mattered to him.

Shivering erratically, you almost crested your high when Patrick harshly grasped your throat and pressed you against the wall, possessively he began to smack his cock against your clit, each slap he made was taking your breath away.

“Tell me, Cupcake…” he grunted against your neck, brushing his swollen tip along your throbbing nub barely sensible. “Who do you belong to?”

“You…Only y-you...”

Bateman squeezed your neck with blatant dominance and demanded in a low voice, "Uh, not quite convincing…try again."

“Aa-aww! I… I belong to you…Daddy!” You cried out through your pressed palm when he sped up the tempo, slapping your pussy with nasty wet sounds.

With a devilish smirk on his face, Patrick had to hold you still as you cummed so hard, gushing on his dick and fidgeting around the wall. Multiple waves of pleasure were washing over you like a waterfall, leaving you completely exhausted, you didn’t even have any power to moan. 

And soon, you became limp in his powerful arms, allowing him peacefully patting your head as he praised you. “You can be a good girl when you really want to,” Bateman kissed your temple, fixing his pants. “But still, you could just let me help you with this fucking dress.”

“You can help me now…” You replied, hungrily catching the air.

Smugly, Patrick eventually undid the clasp on your dress, not missing the moment to leave a red mark on your shoulder blade as he sucked on your soft skin. “Speaking about dresses. Since my favourite one didn’t fit, you can choose whatever you want…I don’t really care.”

You sighed, smiling ironically to yourself. “Great!”

Bateman didn’t stop smirking even for a second, he was so pleased with himself that he didn’t notice your sarcastic intonation, he just ignored it, as usual. “Come out when you are ready, I’ll wait for you in the hall.”

“What for? I can pay for this myself.”

His cheesy titter unpleasantly cut your ear. “I don't want you to starve, babe,” you cast an angry glance at him, but he only stroked your cheek before adding: “You only need to be an obedient girl, and I'll give you as many gifts as you want.”

“But I didn’t ask...”

A sudden ring of his mobile phone got his attention, so he hushed you with a finger before quickly going out from the dressing room, leaving you alone with your inflaming rage.

Snorting tiredly, you mentally screwed him a million times in a row, changed your clothes and tried not to even think about eavesdropping on his conversation with whoever it was. As you left the dressing room, you heard the echo of his voice from nearby.

“Jesus, Evelyn! I’ve told you already, I can’t take the time off work.”

At that moment, you could swear your legs weren't listening as they led you straight to the source of the sound. With your heart beating, you halted near the dressing room when his voice suddenly fell silent, and the next second the curtain was carelessly pulled aside so that your frightened eyes met his furious ones.

'Oops!'

Annoyed, Patrick stared at you with his hands crossed on his chest. It was too late to run now, so you stood still and heard him saying:

"Are you lost?" With a cocky grin, he picked up his briefcase and stepped closer to you.

"No...I mean, yes. Probably," your cheeks burned from the inside as the strong feeling of embarrassment hit you like a truck. "I was just looking for you and..."

"Aha," he crooned before towering over you, grabbing you possessively by the waist and leaning down to whisper in your ear: "Do you know the proverb 'curiosity killed the cat'?"

"I haven't heard it since I was a kid," you confessed, swallowing hard as you watched him taking the dresses from your hands, the mysterious grin never leaving his face. "Sorry, I really didn't mean to eavesdrop."

“I’m sure you didn’t.” Haughtily, Patrick winked at you, and that was really confusing because his unpredictable mood changes were the most difficult puzzle you had ever known.

“You don’t even want to see which dress I chose?”

"Not really, I'll see it tomorrow anyway," his voice sounded more stern now. "Unless you change your mind about going with me.”

He cast a challenging glance at you, but before you had a chance to reply, Bateman walked past you and gestured for you to follow. Slightly disappointed, you went after him and soon you made it to the hall where all this shit started.

"So, did the young lady find something to her taste?" The stylist asked as soon as he saw you coming. 

"Yep," Patrick let him pick up the dresses and put them on the big table next to the beautiful leather couch on which Bateman kept looking in disgust and you didn't even know why. "(Y/n), c'mon, point with your finger to which dress you like?"

The way he cooed to you was absolutely stunning. Sometimes it seemed like he could read you like an open book, and that only made you feel insecure.

"I think this one." You replied with a shy smile.

"Nice, very nice!" Mr. Graham exclaimed before calling for an assistant to pack your dress. "That will be 2800 dollars, sir."

Satisfied, Bateman hummed to himself and pulled out his wallet. "Do you take credit cards?"

"Of course!"

All the while, you were pretty shocked by the price for just a piece of fabric. Frowning, you didn’t even realize you were saying it out loud. "2800 dollars, for this?"

Everyone, including Patrick, turned to look at you; the stylist was seriously confused and he just mumbled: "Excuse me?"

"Huh, don't worry," Bateman chuckled and handed him his platinum AmEx credit card. "She just can't believe I finally bought her a dress of your brand. Am I right, dear?"

When Patrick glanced at you, you felt a cold breeze run through your body—he must have been really angry. "Mmm, yes! I have been dreaming about this for so long."

Even though you were not an actress, your words sounded more than natural. Both men smiled at each other and proceeded with the payment procedure.

All the way back to his apartment you both remained almost silent. Patrick continued to listen to the rock track he had paused on before going into the store, looking at you from time to time when you didn't see him, his hand fidgeting with the hem of your new dress that was lying on your knees. Yet, you couldn't believe he'd just bought you a dress that cost more than your monthly rent. You hated to owe someone, but now you felt like you did, and it was killing you from the inside...because you didn't ask him to get you that dress, you didn't ask him for anything, and still he was trying to push you into the world of luxury where you would be a stranger forever.

'Bullshit.'

"(Y/n), what's on your mind?" His sudden question caught you off guard, and you almost bit your tongue. Why did he even ask, when it seemed he could read your mind?

Fidgeting in your seat, you turned away from the window and gazed into his brown eyes, now filled with an unrivaled enigma. "Just thinking about how to survive all the challenges you have set for me."

You heard him laugh softly, and before you could continue, he hugged your shoulders and snuggled into your small frame, the heat his body was radiating melted the cold shell you had been building up since the moment he decided to 'help' you in the dressing room.

“Challenges?” Patrick rejoined, nuzzling against your neck as he pulled your collar down a bit. 

“Yes, Patrick,” you were trying to hold yourself as much as you could, not giving him more weaknesses to play around. “You know how much I hate all these fancy things which are made only for rich people.”

Bateman only purred something incoherently against your skin, tickling it a bit. “Cupcake…I think you need to relax.”

“Relax?”

“Yes, baby,” he tugged you closer, his nose was nearly rubbing against yours. 'Goddamn!' “Relax and take it easy.”

"Stop, stop, stop..." you pushed him away a bit, forcing his headphones to slide down his head completely. "You've reminded me almost every day...that I'm not from 'your world', that I'm just a mortal who can't afford to buy fucking clothes that cost a fortune...and now you're telling me to just relax?"

Patrick huffed and rolled his eyes. “(Y/n)...don’t even start this conversation again.”

“You’re such an…”

Despite the fact that the partition in the cab was closed, it seemed as if the taxi driver heard your loud voice, and the next moment he opened it to ask you if everything was all right.

When you said that everything was fine, he started to drive again and you clenched your palms into fists, feeling the embarrassment and anger fighting in your mind.

"You're ashamed of me, aren't you?" You wondered without looking at him. 

The way Bateman exhaled was not a good sign. "When you make such scenes—yes, I am." 

Sighing, you pressed a hand to your forehead. Damn, he was affecting you so badly and you hated yourself for it, for being so weak next to him, so vulnerable...you were literally losing yourself.

His apartment looked perfect as always, so clean, so posh, but there was something strange this time as you walked across the living room and saw a large bouquet of white roses on his kitchen island.

"Mmm, such beautiful flowers!" You approached them to inhale their scent.

"Yeah," he stated from behind, placing your dress on the back of his white couch. "I bought them for you."

Stunned, you broke away from them as if you were pricked. “For me?”

"I'm not going to repeat it," Patrick blurted out, walking into the kitchen to grab a glass and a bottle of super expensive whiskey. "Besides, I don't think it makes any sense now."

'Excellent.' 

Without asking, Bateman set a glass on the bar counter in front of you as you took a seat near it. Still frowning with irritation, he poured some red wine for you, and when you were about to thank him, he just strolled away. The situation was rather unconventional, to say the least, and you didn't really know what to do, maybe just leave?

"Patrick, I think we both need to cool off a bit...right?" you sipped at your wine, waiting for his answer, but he continued to ignore you. "I'm going to finish my drink and probably go home."

"Whatever." Was all he said, standing with his back to your face, clearly thinking about something. 

Upset, you stifled a sad gasp and took the glass before getting up. When you reached his white couch to have a look at your dress for distraction, you suddenly heard his challenging voice:

"You want to know who Evilyn is, don't you?"

Paralyzed, you almost choke on your wine. After coughing a little, you turned to see him standing near the coffee table with his hands in his pockets. This was getting serious.

"I don't understand, why do you ask?"

Patrick chuckled loudly and shook his head in disbelief. "Stop acting like a fool, Cupcake. I know you want this, I can even feel it," his face grimaced a bit dangerously while his eyes were getting darker by the second. "You've wanted it since we left the boutique, that's why you started acting like a bitch."

Trembling with burning rage, you squeezed the glass, almost breaking it. "I'm not in the mood for scenes, you know," you countered, not even noticing that you took a few confident steps toward him. "When I leave, you can bring Evelyn, Courtney, Meredith, whoever… and confront them for as long as you want!"

"Or maybe we can all have some fun together, huh?" he drawled the last words, enjoying the sight of your angry expression. "There's plenty of me to go around."

Scowling, you wanted to spit in his face, or slap him, or both. But instead, you just smiled and that was a little unexpected for him. "You're sick, Patrick. And I feel really sorry for you."

After saying that, you turned away from him to pick up the dress – you wanted to leave this place as soon as possible, so you even forgot about the glass in your hand.

"Of the two of us, you are the one who really needs some grief," his voice hurt you like a slow-acting poison, it was excruciating. Before Bateman returned to the kitchen, he added, "Evelyn is my fiancée, and has been all along. What an unpleasant surprise?"

A loud sound of broken glass echoed through the living room as soon as you heard his last words. It was a real miracle that the wine didn't splash onto the luxurious fabric of his white couch, but you didn't really care at that moment, with your heart beating so crazy in your chest. Closing your eyes, you took a deep breath and stood still, not hearing Patrick's footsteps behind you.  

'Damn, that glass must have cost a fortune.'

"Cupcake..."

"I know!" You cut him off, raising your trembling hands in the air. "I'll return the money...just tell me how much it costs?"

'Don't cry. Please, don't cry!' But you did, and when you felt his warm hand wrap around your forearm, you tried to push him away, yelping:

"Give me...give me something to clean the floor!"

"(Y/n), calm down! You're bleeding." 

"What?" you gasped, opening your eyes wide before looking down at your feet to see blood running down your ankle as a sharp piece of glass sank into your soft skin. Only then did you realize you were injured, a sharp pain hitting your brain like a lightning strike. “Oh, God…I thought it was w-wine…” You stammered as that was the end point for your nervous system.

With no more waiting, Bateman carefully took you in his arms to lift you up. Sobbing, you let him carry you into the bathroom and sat on the edge of his beautiful black tub. Gently, he removed your shoes and stretched out your bruised leg to assess the damage.

"Is it that bad?" You asked him in a shaky voice, trying not to look down at the wound. 

"No, but it would be better if you stopped flinching." He insisted, releasing your leg and going to the sink to get antiseptic, tweezers, bandages and cotton pads. 

As Patrick knelt before you, holding a pair of tweezers, time seemed to freeze for you, but then you screamed from the itching pain as he carefully pulled the shard of glass from your ankle.

"Mmmh," you mumbled through your palm when he pressed a cotton pad soaked in antiseptic. "Shit…I am so clumsy and reckless..."

"You are," Bateman murmured as he wrapped a bandage around your leg. Every move he made was very gentle and accurate. "But still, you are mine."

"No, I'm not," you struggled to free yourself from his grip, but his hands held your leg very tightly. "We both know that's not true..."

Shivering, you peered down at him as he remained on his knee beside you. Almost immediately, his hazel eyes locked with yours, mesmerizing as always. "Why is it always so difficult with you?"

“Ask yourself.”

The moment you attempted to get up, you almost fell on the floor, but Patrick caught you in his arms at the last second.

"Patrick, let me go..." you pushed him into his chest to get some distance, but he didn't even move. "I will leave and forget everything that happened between us. Just like you wanted!"

"I never said I wanted to!" he growled, holding you closer so you could almost feel his fast heartbeat. "Why can't you just be a good girl and accept what I give you?"

"Oh, you've already given me enough, believe me!"

Annoyed, Bateman just shook his head before pressing a finger to your lips, silencing you and taking your breath away. 

'No, no, no. Not again'

You swallowed hard as you felt his thumb slide up to your cheek to wipe away your salty tears. 

'Stop.'

"Cupcake."

'His voice, his scent, his brawny body.' 

"Look at me," Patrick whispered sweetly, and you felt yourself going limp in his strong arms, so you obeyed and let him kiss your temple. "You're driving me crazy and I hate it...because I'm so fucking obsessed with you!"

One sharp breath and his lips were on yours, forcing your hands to claw at his jacket, but Bateman only pulled you closer, deepening the kiss as his wet tongue played with yours. Panting against his mouth, you couldn't help but run your fingers through his soft hair, making it look so messy, but Patrick didn't care. Slowly, he lifted you up a bit to set you down on the sink opposite his bathtub, peppering your neck with little pecks.

"Daddy."

Just one simple word could turn this man into a savage beast, you knew it, but you couldn't stop yourself as your inner nature yearned for him and it felt like you were meant for each other, two broken souls finally found each other.

"Cupcake." He kissed your lips briefly before moving down to your cleavage and unbuttoning your shirt, his hot breath tickling your bare skin.

Everything about him was so intoxicating that your clouded mind refused to function at all and now you couldn't hear your inner voice begging you to stop. 

Quivering, you arched your back a little to give him better access, and immediately you heard him growl against your collarbone as he finally undid your shirt. Patrick didn't even bother to remove your bra - he just pulled it down, revealing your taut nipples; he licked his lips at the sight of them and then his greedy mouth was already devouring one of them.

"A-awwww," you mewled, hugging his shoulders as you literally melted under his touch. "Mmm, please!"

"Please what?" He looked at you, twisting your hard peak between his skilled fingers. 

"I..." you hiccupped from the way Bateman spread your legs as he nestled into you with pure possession, groping your hip and licking your neck. "I... don't know... Gosh!"

This was pure madness, what was consuming your mind, with every kiss he made, breaking all your barriers, the more you tried to resist it, the more it hit you back. Panting, you threw your head back and felt your eyes begin to water again as his strong hands caressed your trembling little body. Never in your life had you felt so lost. Never.

"Relax, sweetheart," Patrick mused into your ear as he slid his palm between your legs. And of course you were so shamelessly wet that you could flood his floor. "I got you."

"I can't, a-aah..." You sighed, tears streaming down your cheeks.

"Yes, you can," Bateman planted another sloppy kiss on your neck before grabbing your hand to press it against the hard bulge in his pants. "I couldn't stop thinking..." he paused, drinking in your stifled moans as he gave your clit a few slight rubs. "Do you think about me, Cupcake? I know you do..."

"Mm-mhh," your hands roamed desperately down his broad back, fumbling with the smooth fabric of his suit. "And I...ahh-I know you don't think about me..."

A loud whimper fell from your lips as he shoved two fingers into your dripping pussy, almost causing you to bump your head against the mirror behind, but he prevented it by wrapping his hand around your neck.

"You're mistaken," his low groan echoed against the walls of his bathroom, sending shivers down your spine and coaxing your inner muscles to spasm around his fingers as they mercilessly rammed in and out of your throbbing cunt. "Because you know nothing about me," Patrick curled his fingers to stimulate your most sensitive spot, gritting his teeth as his aching cock was about to explode with ravenous desire. "Now be a sweet girl like you always are and..."

"Owwww!" you screamed in sharp pain as he accidentally pushed on your wound. “It hurts!”

"Fuck, I forgot...damn it!" He cursed and removed his hand from your leg.

Seizing the moment of his confusion, you slipped out of his embrace and nearly ran for the door, and thank God it was open, because when you heard his almost furious groan, your heart skipped a beat:

"Come back!" 

"No, it can't be like this," you leaned against the door, holding out a hand defensively. "Not after what you said..."

Trembling, you watched him breathe heavily through his red nostrils, his wild gaze seeming to burn you alive as his self-control was about to snap. Scared, you weren't sure what to expect from him next, so you decided to leave this place right now, while it was still not too late.

Quickly, you walked into his living room and grabbed the damn dress, trying not to think about the broken glass and spilled wine. To be fair, you thought Patrick was going to chase you or threaten you with punishment, but none of that happened as he stayed in his bathroom. It was suspicious, but you would think about it later. 

As you were about to leave, you walked past the open door to the bathroom and told yourself to just go and not look back. But when you reached the front door, you froze and sobbed - your heart sinking while your mind was waving a red flag.

'Just leave, please!'

Huffing, you turned and walked back to the open door. The scene you saw was not what you expected, it simply broke your heart - Bateman was standing still by the sink, leaning on his hands with his head bowed.

"Patrick."

"You're still here?" He asked without looking at you.

"I'll go with you tomorrow...but I'm not doing it for you," your voice wavered, but you didn't allow yourself to sound weak. "I just wanted to make that clear."

And then you left him alone in his super luxurious apartment on Manhattan's Upper West Side. No matter how hard you tried to hold back your tears, they kept slipping down your cheeks. Even when you were in the cab on your way home, your soul was still aching because it seemed like the wounds he made couldn't be healed.

When the night came, there were only a few windows with lights on, and Patrick's bedroom window was one of them.

Irritated, Bateman lay on his bed while a blonde girl sucked him off, bobbing her head up and down at a fast tempo. There was no denying that she was trying her best to give him as much pleasure as possible, but he felt nothing, literally no emotions – only the dark void inside his mind.

"(Y/n), you're doing everything wrong...not the way I like it!" Patrick grumbled, pulling on the girl's hair.

"Who?" She asked confusedly, looking up at him. "My name is Meredith, in case you forgot, honey."

Bateman just laughed and carelessly pushed her down, forcing her to continue. "Shut your fucking mouth and suck my dick. You stupid whore!"

Meredith was making too many noises which annoyed him so much as he was trying to concentrate on dreaming of you—your beautiful face, your innocent sparkling eyes. Although this girl was very pretty, definitely 'his type', there was not a single trace of you and he thought he would never reach his high.

"Mmhm, Patrick…Maybe you will fuck me already?" 

"Maybe," he sighed, watching her laying on her back with undisguised excitement, but then he frowned in a weird disgust. "No, get on your knees. I can't see your fucking face."

"W-what? What's wrong with you today?Ah!"

Angrily, he slapped her hip and rolled her onto her stomach. Without any preparation, he bottomed out, closing his eyes and thinking about the way you twitched every time he thrust inside you. Speeding up his pounding, Patrick finally felt his orgasm building up inside his body when she suddenly moaned. "Oh, yeah! Daddy, it feels so good!" 

That was not even rage, it was something beyond that. Brutally, he squeezed her neck, almost choking her, and growled near her ear as he leaned down. "Never call me that! Understand?" he yanked her against the bed, still clutching her throat, and only when she was on the verge of asphyxia he released her, fucking her harder and gritting his teeth. "Fucking bitch, you should thank me for not killing you."

Camera flashes never stopped clicking in front of your eyes, you almost thought it was impossible to hide from them. They were literally everywhere, as were the countless supermodels and rich yuppies who looked at them without shame, their hungry eyes ready to eat them alive.

"Hey, are you trying to get lost or what?" 

With a soft gasp, you stopped and turned around to see Patrick's irritated face as you walked through the huge hall, every part of which gave you strong vibes of luxury lifestyle.

"I don't think you'd notice my absence anyway," you replied, walking straight until his arm wrapped around your waist, causing your lungs to spasm from the sudden lack of oxygen. "Patrick?"

"Listen to me," he pulled you closer and leaned down to your ear, whispering in a serious tone. "There are a lot of bad people here who came for more than just fashion."

"Even worse than you?"

He scowled, but continued. "Much worse, believe me."

"Don't pretend you care," you tried to walk away, brushing his hand aside, but he tightened his grip. "Get off me!"

"You're too naive and innocent. I don't want you getting into trouble while you're here with me." Tensed, Bateman stroked your back to calm you down a bit as he noticed the people around starting to stare at you.

"That's very sweet, but I don't need your 'protection'...I'm pretty sure you came here for the same reason as all the other yuppies." 

"I didn't ask for your opinion, okay? Let's get to our seats," he said possessively, easily cradling you in his arms, covering your small frame like a cocoon. "We have the best seats, by the way. Right next to the runaway."

"Amazing," you murmured as he led you through the endless crowds. "Not a single model will escape your gaze."

"That's right."

Frowning, you were about to slip out of his grip when suddenly someone ran into you, stomping painfully on your feet.

"Ouch!" Your loud whimper caused Patrick to turn in your direction, but then he froze as he looked over your shoulder at the blonde girl who was immediately apologizing. 

"Oh God, I'm so sorry..." the familiar voice hit you like a bolt of lightning. "I can be so clumsy," she touched her forehead before locking her lost gaze with Bateman's. "Patrick?"

That was Courtney. There was no doubt it was her, especially when she smiled at him so brightly it could easily outshine the Sun. 

"Hello, Courtney. It's so good to see you!" Patrick crooned gallantly, his arms finally releasing your shivering body. 

But even if a few minutes ago you wanted him to take his hands off you, now you were feeling a bit upset that he actually did.

"How could I miss this?" She asked flirtatiously, completely ignoring your presence. "Where are your seats?"

"Yeah, where are they?" You blurted out abruptly, making them both almost jump. "I just don't want to interrupt your sweet conversation and..."

You almost hissed from the sudden pain as you felt his firm hand on your ass, pinching your buttocks. His face didn't change, though, as he continued to grin haughtily, his eyes never ceasing to roam over Courtney's pretty body. With slight irritation, Bateman approached your neck and whispered in your ear how to get to your seats, then nibbled briefly on your earlobe as a sign of his displeasure, but you didn't pay any attention.

"Thank you, Daddy." You uttered the last word in the most disgustingly sweet way you could and strolled away without looking back. No matter how much you wanted to, you just couldn't.

Patrick wasn't lying—the seats were really so close to the runway that you could probably see every little detail on the models' clothes.

After about fifteen minutes, it was getting dark, which meant that the show was about to start. You fidgeted in your seat, trying to find a comfortable position, but it just didn't work, your butt was still sore from Bateman's pinch.

As soon as you remembered him, you heard his voice as he moved across the seats to reach his place. Patrick grinned at you smugly as he sat down next to you, crossing one leg over the other and fixing his hair.

"You must be very pleased with yourself, Cupcake?" He asked mockingly.

You scowled and pretended not to understand what he was saying as the music turned up really loud: "I can't hear you."

Patrick just chuckled softly, put a hand on the back of your seat and moved closer. "I said you look so beautiful today."

'God, what a jerk.' 

"Can't say the same about you."

"Uh, such an angry little kitten," Bateman laughed, looking at you from under his beautiful lashes. "I don't think I'll survive this."

"You really think I care?"

And then the show started, unfortunately not allowing you to finish what you were about to say. As expected, the models looked gorgeous and the clothes they were wearing were absolutely amazing—you had to admit that. Although you tried your best not to notice the way Patrick was staring at the girls on the runway, you had to claw at your skin when one of them winked at him without any shame.

"This is the grace I've been telling you about," he bowed closer to you to make sure you heard what he was saying. "The perfect example of feminine beauty."

You smiled ironically and replied without looking at him: "The real beauty begins when the boys come out."

Your sudden statement elicited a muffled groan from his chest, but Bateman simply nodded and turned away from you. From that moment on, he was almost silent, and it was a little strange, but as the male models appeared on the runway, you stopped analyzing and just enjoyed the handsome men walking back and forth in front of you. Everything was fine until one of the models found your eyes in the crowd and smiled at you. And of course Patrick wouldn't miss it.

"Do you like him?"

"W-who?" You stammered, feeling his warm hand on your knee.

"The model who just walked by," he murmured, stroking your exposed skin under the hem of your dress, sensing the way you tensed under his touch. "Maybe you should go talk to him after the show."

Shit, you couldn't believe he meant it or... you just didn't want to believe it?

"I'm not like you, Patrick," you chastised, feeling so damned angry as his words cut painfully through your heart. "You sometimes forget that not everyone is like that..."

"Like what?" Bateman scoffed with a raised eyebrow.

"You know what I mean." You added with a teasing smile and turned away from him, but he immediately grabbed your face, forcing you to squeal from the unexpectedness. 

"No, I don't," he scoffed, pushing on your jaw. "C'mon, Cupcake, tell me."

The surrounding darkness came in handy in this situation, not to mention the fact that almost everyone was focused on watching the show, so Bateman felt pretty confident knowing that no one would notice your little fight here.

"Get off!" You hissed, wrapping both your hands around his wrist in an attempt to pry it away.

"Awww, look at those little hands," he pulled you closer, so you could feel his hot breath on your trembling lips. "You are so small and yet so brave. It fascinates me, I won't lie."

You froze for a second as his words caught you off guard. Blinking several times, you didn't even notice that his large palm was now gently stroking your chin, moving up to your cheek and ending this little intimate moment by pressing lightly on your half-opened lips.

Actually, that was the worst thing he could do at that moment, because his illusory softness and tenderness hurts like hell. It was like a sweet candy with a sharp blade inside.

Just as you realized how close your faces were, you tried to pull away, but Patrick's grip was too tight. Fixing you in place by your chin, he captured your mouth with his, hungrily relishing your taste, your shiver, your muffled gasp against his lips. Bateman tested your limits so masterfully that every little move he made was as precise as his side profile. Slowly he wrapped one hand around your neck while another was already resting on your waist, the kiss you shared was something more than just physical contact, and you let yourself sink into the flow of emotions, closing your eyes and letting him kiss deeper. You almost moaned, but the surrounding music of the show drowned out any obscene sounds that tried to escape your swollen lips.

His strong, warm tongue danced along yours, not even giving you a chance to take the lead, so you just opened your mouth wider and let your noses brush together, forcing your hearts to beat in a crazy rhythm.

God, this man was the darkest curse... the most delightful blessing.

After a few seconds, the people around started applauding so loudly that you had to open your eyes just as the lights came on. The strange delusion that was like a white veil behind your vision began to fade, and only then did you and Patrick realize that you were both staring at each other, your mouths still pressed together.

A second, two seconds.

It seemed as if you were both waiting to see who would break away first, and as soon as you heard someone coughing behind your back, you pulled away from Patrick's strong arms, but you knew that you only managed to break free because he let you.

"Patrick! I thought I wouldn't see you here!" A familiar female voice echoed from above and you didn't even bother to turn around to see another bimbo Bateman was hanging out with.

Shit, what if she saw what you were doing?

At first you thought Patrick would pretend he didn't know you or something, but instead Bateman smiled smugly and put his hand on the back of your chair.

Annoyed, but still as majestic as a lion, he looked up at the blonde and said quickly: "Hi, Meredith."

Her face turned into a sad grimace, though she pretended that Bateman's indifference didn't upset her. Obviously, Meredith was outraged and needed someone to take her anger out on. 

With a haughty grin, she scoffed and almost stepped on your foot. "I don't understand, how can a man like you go out with someone like... her?"

Damn, that was such an obvious insult that it didn't even trigger a single emotion, you just gave her a deadly stare when you finally met her little eyes and you could swear that you saw a trace of fear in them.

"I asked myself the same question," you muttered suddenly, getting up from your seat and looking at Patrick, whose perfect eyebrows now frowned, especially when he understood what you were you doing—he squeezed the back of the chair until his knuckles turned white. "Have a nice evening." 

With those words, you quickly walked away, and you were so damn glad that Bateman decided not to follow you, because with every step you took, your eyes got more and more watery. 

"How did she even get here? Ugly people like that should stay at home to avoid traumatizing anyone." Meredith hissed as she watched your little figure moving away from them. "Who is she?" 

Patrick chuckled, then did his classic move of parrying the question with his natural charm. "Oh, you're so mean," he muttered as he watched the blonde take your seat next to him. Playfully, Bateman pinched her nose and they both started to giggle, no matter how disgusted he felt himself right now, he wouldn't admit that your sudden leaving made him sad. "Such an angry little bitch."

You couldn't remember how you found your way to the ladies' room, but as soon as you stepped up to the sink and looked in the mirror, you scowled and clenched your fists from the sharp pain in your chest. 

"I... I hate you so much!" You hissed in a trembling voice, not really knowing who you were addressing, yourself or Patrick, who was probably already taking the blonde bimbo to his place.

His womanizer nature was not a secret, so why did it hurt so fucking much? 

Depressed by your weakness towards this man, you wanted to smash the mirror to stop seeing this sad face covered with tears, but you heard someone coming, so you just froze in place with your trembling hands in the air. A model walked past you and accidentally bumped your shoulder.

"Oh! I'm so sorry!" She squealed and opened the fauster to wash her hands.

Even though you understood that she didn't do it on purpose, it made you so mad that you almost ran out of the bathroom, loudly slamming the door behind you.

The moment you realized that you couldn't remember how to get out of here made all your insides cramp like a spring, and you thought you were just going to fall to the floor from a sudden fear of being lost. 'Fuck, not now, not now!'

Quivering, you looked around, searching for... Patrick? But instead of him, you could only see an endless number of beautiful models strolling here and there. Closing your eyes, you took a deep breath to calm yourself, but when that didn't help, your legs seemed to give way, and you slipped against the wall until you rested on the floor. This panic attack was nothing compared to the ones you had before, your heart pounding painfully against your chest as if trying to burst through it. Things got worse when you felt the lack of oxygen as you literally suffocated with panic and your body burned from the inside out.

The group of models stood by and noticed your small, shivering form, rocking back and forth with your hands wrapped around your head. 

"Hey! Are you okay?" One of them approached you and crouched down beside you, trying to help you up, but you refused.

"Don't touch her, Lizzy! Maybe she's on drugs. Let's go already!"

"No, wait... she clearly needs help," the models looked at each other, one of them trying to pat your shoulder to calm you down, while her friend tapped her foot annoyingly. "Are you in pain? Did someone hurt you?"

"N-no," you finally mumbled, opening your eyes to see that not only two, but many of these girls were already gathered around you. "I— I'm fine, I'm sorry... I'm just..." 

Lost.

Jesus, that was so embarrassing that the words just stuck in your throat like a lump, and now you felt like a little girl who got lost in the big mall when she decided to run away from her parents. 

"What's going on here?" That voice made you almost faint. "Get away!"

A bit roughly, Bateman pulled the model away from you and leaned down to your shivering form.

"HEY! We were just trying to help!"

"Go away! All of you!" He turned and barked at all the girls watching the scene. "Get the hell out of here, there is nothing to look at!"

Your head was spinning, at first you couldn't even believe it was him, hiding you from everyone with his broad, tall figure, as if he was trying to… protect you?

"Cupcake? Cupcake, look at me," his worried cooing made you submit, making you want to believe that he was really concerned about you. Gently, he cupped your face and stroked your slightly disheveled hair. "What happened?"

At first, you didn't say anything — you were paralyzed, mesmerized by his brown eyes, which were gliding desperately up and down your body, checking every little part of it. 

"Who did this to you?"

'You did.'

But he would never know.

"You came," you replied briefly. "Why?" 

Patrick frowned at your answer and let out a tired sigh. "I've been looking for you since you left, because this place is huge, and I didn't want you to get into trouble, but," he paused and brushed your tears away concisely. "But it looks like I'm too late. God, you're so reckless," he shook his head and stood up.

As soon as Patrick did that, something clicked in your head, and you didn't even notice that you were already on your feet as you snuggled up to him and buried yourself in his arms with a deadly grip.

"Please, don't go!" You begged in a trembling voice, hugging him tighter. "Don't leave me!"

Shocked, Bateman didn't know how to react, his arms dropped motionlessly, but then he carefully placed them on your back, drawing invisible lines along your spine. 

"I have to get our coats. You came here in your coat, did you forget?"

Blinking several times as you looked into his eyes, you replied softly: "Yeah… I did."

Patrick couldn't help but smile adorably. "Wait for me here, (y/n). I'll lead you outside, you'll feel better there." He explained and distanced himself from you. "Don't go anywhere! Got it?"

You nodded, and only then did he walk away. Without even looking back, he disappeared into the crowd.

Bateman was right, once you left the building your condition improved, and you could finally breathe in the fresh air, filling your lungs with the oxygen they so desperately needed. A cool wind blew into your face, making you shiver, but it was nothing compared to the emotions you were experiencing right now — the fact that Patrick had come for you, that he was looking for you, left you with no choice but to stifle a loud scream that you wanted so bad to let out.

Bateman remained silent, standing a short distance behind you, puffing on his cigar and watching the smoke rise from it.

"Has this ever happened to you before?" His question came out of nowhere.

You shrugged, but didn't turn around. "Yeah... it happens sometimes, especially in crowded places."

Bateman didn't say anything, but you could feel the tension between the two of you. Without a rush, he moved closer to you, watching you hug yourself — the difference in your sizes made him gulp, but he didn't dare touch you. Not yet.

"Why didn't you tell me then?" He whispered above your ear before smoking his cigar.

"Because it doesn't matter."

"It does."

"No!" You blurted out and turned round to face him. "It… doesn't."

The way he looked at you was enough to make you hold your breath and take a small step back, but the next moment you were already trapped in his sturdy arms, the sharp smell of snuff filling the air around you as he blew off several rings of smoke.

"You're not going anywhere now." His voice lowered, and you closed your eyes from the astonishing sensation of being caught in his strong hands, feeling his hot breath on your face. 

"Patrick," you gasped and hugged him back, surprising him for a second. "Thank you for... for everything."

A loud cacophony of laughter and rumbling got your attention and you looked over his shoulder to see Meredith and her friends coming towards you. She seemed to spot you even faster than you spotted her, and now her eyes were bloodshot red.

"Can you," you stammered, feeling ashamed. "Can you kiss me?"

What the hell was going on inside your head?

Anyway, you didn't have time to reflect on this, because Patrick wasn't the type of person who needs to be asked twice. The moment his soft lips met yours, the ground under your feet seemed to disappear, so he had to hold you with both hands, not caring that his expensive cigar fell down. Even if you would blame yourself for that, all you could think about now was his strong hands sliding along your small form, outlining your curves as you let him do it, while he used his wet tongue to make you go limp in his embrace.

Sneakily, Patrick admired your beautiful face with his half-open eyes, probably not even realizing how much you meant to him, how deep you were rooted in his soul. But did he even have a soul in the first place?

When you broke the kiss, you didn't see Meredith or her friends anymore. Bateman noticed you were looking for something, so he turned to look at the direction of your gaze.

"Cupcake?" He was confused when he didn't see anyone. "Are you sure you're okay?"

"Uh, yeah! I just thought I saw a familiar face," you lied, trying to act natural. "I... I should probably go home."

Patrick gave you a suspicious glance, still holding you in his arms. "Actually, I don't want to leave you alone after what happened."

"What do you mean?" you asked, a little disappointed. "I said I'm fine."

"Shhh," he pressed a finger to your lips, and you felt the smooth, cold leather of his glove. "I know you like to be bratty, but now isn't a good time. You really scared me."

Sighing, you dropped your head and covered his hand with both of yours. "I'm sorry, I... I didn't want you to see me like that."

To be honest, you didn't want anyone to see you like this because you hated looking weak in front of people. Especially in front of people like him, because it would automatically give him another trump card to play around with.

"Let me take you home." Bateman mumbled briefly, fixing your hair and then rubbing your neck to relax you.

"Aren't you afraid you'll have a heart attack coming to my place? It's not like your apartment in Manhattan."

He chuckled and pinched your cheek, leaving you confused and offended.

"Of course it's not," Patrick grinned and poked you in the nose. "I don't have any expectations."

You frowned and tried to push him back, but he only pressed you closer, nuzzling your neck and leaving a small hickey on it for which you were not ready — your muffled whimper made him sneer even louder.

"That's a pretty exhaustive answer," he didn't even allow you to say anything in return as he kissed you again, but this time much more passionately. "I'll get us a cab."

This man was like a hurricane that tossed everything around and no matter how many walls you built — he would break them down, one after the other, because nature couldn't be stopped. It seemed that you were completely disarmed against your own nature, because it was calling for him, it was pushing you into his possession, and you were already so tired of fighting these feelings.

There was something special about New York at night, when millions of lights were shining like diamonds, reflecting on the water of the Hudson River and taking your breath away with the feeling of being so small in such a huge city, where the numerous soaring skyscrapers were almost touching the sky.

Tiredly, you closed your eyes, sighed, and leaned on the armrest of the car door, watching the scenery change behind the window. Patrick listened to the music, as he always did, his hands stroking your knee from time to time, but you could hardly feel it, since you were completely overwhelmed by emotions, feelings and thoughts. It was hard to believe that even after all that had happened, you still let him take you home, knowing damn well that he wouldn't just stay in the cab when it stopped at your place. 

Just as you entered your apartment and turned on the lights, you heard his slightly nervous chuckle and little comment.

“Mmm, it's pretty clean here.”

His words almost made you choke. “Did you really think that my place would look like a dump just because I don't live in Manhattan?”

“I didn't mean that.” Bateman murmured behind you, following you carefully down the hall. “Where can I put my coat?”

“Why do you ask? I don't remember inviting you here,” You took off your coat and put it on the rack next to him. “Aren't you afraid your coat will stink  of poverty?”

Patrick couldn't help but chuckle in a husky voice. “You're funny, Cupcake.”

'And why did I trust this man at all? What was so special about him?'

You didn't say anything, only a thin smile ran over your tired face as you turned around and saw him putting his coat over yours. After that, you continued to walk to your small kitchen, and as soon as you reached the table next to the window, your eyes began to search for something.

“Did you lose something?” He asked, leaning against the wall and hiding his hands in his pockets.

“N-no,” you stammered, as if he had caught you doing something bad. God, he was embarrassing you in your own apartment! “Just … It's been a while since I've had guests.”

Patrick hummed something incoherently and crossed his arms over his broad chest, then moved lazily to the kitchen counter when something caught his eye while you were busy gathering all the stuff on the kitchen table — including some books and various papers from work.

With undisguised interest, Bateman picked up the medicine to take a closer look at its name. “Don't you know these things can cause addiction?”

“What?” You turned to see him examining your sedatives.

“How long have you been taking them?” He asked again, his perfect eyebrows knitted together now.

You sighed tiredly and walked over to him, holding out your hand. “Not too long. Now give it to me, please.”

“I can bring you much better medication than this, since it obviously doesn't work,” he stated in a stern voice, without looking at you. “Because the panic attacks are still kicking your pretty ass.”

His words made your jaw clench, but you didn't even try to snatch the medication from him, instead you just let out a soft groan of annoyance, crossed your arms and rolled your eyes.

“That's very kind of you, but I have to decline your offer.” You replied, watching him shake his head in irritation. “Besides, you can only get those pills with a doctor's prescription.”

Patrick just shrugged and put the pills back on the kitchen counter.

“That's not a problem,” he quickly straightened his red tie before stepping closer to you. “I have one of the best therapists in the city.”

“Uh-huh, and the pharmacy you go to is probably one of the best, too?”

He grinned. “Sure, I usually get my meds from the one on Broadway.”

“Good for you.”

You started to saunter away from him, but his hands caught you faster than you could react. The next thing you knew, Bateman was holding you tightly against his tall, broad frame, looking down at you with obvious concern.

“Cupcake,” he murmured in a sweet voice, tracing a finger along your cheek. “I just want to help.”

Damn, this man only had to touch you a little bit and you were already lost in him. 

“Patrick, you don't have to. I—” You didn't have a chance to finish your sentence because your lips were sealed by his. 

Completely defenseless and vulnerable — that was how you felt right now, and it seemed as if he could feel it as the kiss grew deeper and more intense with each passing moment. Cautiously, you rested your hands on his shoulders before sliding them down to the lapels of his suit, fumbling with the soft material and feeling the ground disappearing beneath your feet.

'It's already too much.'

Only when you were both breathless did Patrick decide to break the kiss, but his arms were still wrapped around your waist, as if he was afraid you would disappear like a mirage. 

“You were involved in all this because of me," he paused and leaned down to you again, letting your noses rub against each other. This little physical contact made your heart flutter. “And you really made me worry.”

Bateman said it so quickly, as if he wasn't even thinking properly at that moment. Embarrassed, you shrugged a bit in his arms. No matter how hard you tried to believe this man, all you could think about now was whether you were trapped in his other manipulative, mind games.

“I’ll be fine, I promise,” you put a hand on his chest, feeling his heart beating fast under your fingertips and the next second you pulled your hand away as if you got burned. “Anyway, it’s late already and you probably have some more interesting stuff to do.”

His soft chuckling was annoying but pleasant to hear. “You’re not quite hospitable, aren’t you?”

Eventually, he let you go and stepped aside, unbuttoning his jacket — that scene caused your pulse to race. 

“What are you doing?” “What does it look like?”

You crossed your arms and sighed. “Patrick, I really appreciate your help and… the show was really cool, but I doubt I would ever go back to that place again.” 'Damn it, did I actually say that?'

After Bateman removed his jacket, he carefully put it on the back of one of the kitchen chairs and tucked his sleeves. 

“You’re welcome,” he beamed with a cocky smile. “I thought you would offer me some tea, coffee or something?”

“I doubt I have anything good to your taste,” slowly, you turned away from him, as an unpleasant feeling of shame struck you right through your chest. “Mmm, I can only offer you mineral water but it’s not Apollinaris.”

“Oh, dear,” he crooned and suddenly hugged you from behind. “I didn’t expect you to have Apollinaris. Honestly.”

Gasping barely audibly, you covered his arms on your waist with your own arms and cocked your head to meet his brown eyes and for God’s sake, why did he always look so tempting, so captivating, so… magnetizing?

With a sharp breath, you managed to avoid another kiss he planned to pull you into, and it coaxed a low growl of disappointment to erupt from his half-opened lips which were so intended to collapse with yours. 

“Patrick,” you gulped when he nuzzled against your neck, leaving small wet marks along your sensitive skin. “Please, stop. Let me just bring you some water and I want to relax a bit, after… after everything that happened.”

It was kinda unexpected that Bateman decided to let you go as easy as that without even trying to overpower you like he always does.

“And what do you do to relax?"

“Hot bath.” You responded without looking at him. Annoyed, you stumbled past him to grab the meds he was inspecting a few minutes ago, and then you opened the fridge to take out the bottle of mineral water. As soon as you started to pour the water into the most beautiful glass you had, you noticed his persistent stare, which made you almost spill the water onto the kitchen counter. “What?”

“These pills are no good for you, (y/n),” his anxious tone was very unnatural, you didn’t even remember him sounding like this ever before. “Stop being stubborn.”

With a small thud, you put the glass on the table next to him and replied a bit aggressively: "I don't think they're worse than coke."

At first, Bateman just gritted his teeth and clenched his hands into fists, but then he took a quick sip of the mineral water, trying as hard as he could to play cool.

“Thanks.” Was all he said and that was actually not the reaction you have expected.

There was an awkward silence hanging in the air for some seconds and none of you wanted to continue this conversation, but once you tried to move his hand (that was wrapped around your forearm), his low voice engulfed you like a hot steam.

“Cupcake, I just want to make sure you won’t do anything bad.” “W-what do you mean?” You frowned in confusion and glanced at his hand before you raised your eyes to his perfect face. “Patrick, I suffer from panic attacks… not the things you're thinking of.”

“Then, go take a bath and I’ll leave after that.”

“But I’m not a child,” the more you were trying to resist him, the more your body was yearning for his touch, his large palm on your back was enough to make you forget how to breathe. “You don't owe me anything, this is my problem and I’ll handle this, just like I was doing it before.”

“To be fair, your behavior only shows how immature you are,” he crooned and traced a long, sensible line along your spine. “But, I’ll give you the benefit of the doubt since you’re overwhelmed.”

At some point, you found yourself tired from trying to convince him to leave you alone, so you just nodded and quickly took your sedative before heading to the bathroom under his attentive gaze. After all, even if you even attempted to make him go away you would fail because compared to him you were so small and weak — Patrick had power over you in all ways, and he knew that. 

You were trapped in your own flat, what nonsense.

In a few minutes, you were sitting in the bath and letting the warm water bring you some relief, just like it always did. Affected by sedatives, you didn’t even remember whether you closed the bathroom door or not, but being honest, you didn’t really care, because even if Patrick came here he wouldn’t see anything new. 

The bitter aftertaste of what happened made you feel like shit, and you really didn't know how to find a way out from it. As if it was not enough for you to be dependent on Patrick (you owe him a lot of money), now you gave him more weaknesses that he could potentially use against you. 

'Excellent!'

Hugging your knees, you burst in tears — salty tears that were falling into the water, leaving small circles on it. Before now, you didn’t even realize how devastated you were. You closed your eyes for a second and you drifted off almost instantly, and with each passing moment, your body was submerging into the water more and more.

Meanwhile, Bateman was sitting on the little couch in your living room, which he suddenly found pretty cozy, though he checked if everything was clean enough before he dared to take a seat. Did he really think that people outside Manhattan used to live in dirty, trashy apartments? Well, maybe he did, since he didn’t even remember when was the last time he was in such places.

Ever since you left, Patrick had been fighting the temptation to go through your things to find something interesting, which he would of course use for his own interests. But instead, he picked up one of your books from the coffee table, and as he did so, a small piece of paper fell out. Squinting suspiciously, Bateman leaned down to grab it, only to almost crumple it when he saw your handwriting —  the paper was completely covered with your notes, and they were all the same phrase — "If I want to be loved as I am, I have to be willing to love others as they are." Patrick couldn't count how many times you had written that, but each line he read evoked something strange in him — the unraveling feeling that urged him to rip the paper, to crumple it. Is it compassion that he was so afraid of?

Closing his eyes for a moment, Bateman took a deep breath and put the paper back in the book, no matter how much he wanted to destroy it or forget what he had just read. After that, he checked his Rolex and noticed that it had been quite a while since you had left. Slowly, he got up from the couch and went to the bathroom. His 'sixth sense' had never failed him before, so he decided to rely on it and check on you.

Patrick didn’t knock once he noticed that the door was not closed, he just stepped in, looking for you.

“Cupcake, are you—”

A chilling shock swept over him when he saw only the top of your head above the water. Without a second thought, he ran across the bathroom and knelt down beside the tub to pull you out of the water, and the moment he did, you began to cough, clinging to his arms and desperately gasping for air.

“Pat-Patrick,” you were shaking so badly, so he had to hold you in one place, pressing you against his solid chest. “I don’t know how that happened… I… I didn’t want this I—” “Shh, (y/n),” Bateman cooed at you in order to calm you down, but he wasn't any less scared than you. “It’s okay, I’m here.”

Trembling, you looked up at him — your eyes so red from tears, your heart beating like a broken alarm-clock. “I think I ruined your suit… I’m so sorry!”

Appalled, you tried to break free but Patrick didn’t let you move, his strong arms were holding you like tight ropes. Damn, he was so angry — he could sense his blood boiling inside his veins, forcing his jaw to clench in a silent growl. He was so fucking mad at himself. 

How could he let this happen? 

As this question ran through his bewildered mind, he froze in fear. He didn't know if he was talking about letting you nearly drown in your own bathtub or letting you take roots on his broken soul. Maybe that was the reason you two had bonded, two broken souls seeking for something that would stop their pain, something that would bring them freedom from a burdened life. But how could he help you when every day he was fighting his dark side, the side you didn't know about yet? The side he wished you would never meet.

Never.

"God... I'm so stupid." You cried out, interrupting his train of thought and bringing him back to reality. 

"Shh," Bateman husked, cupping your face. "Stop talking!" He sighed and looked into your blurry eyes, breathing so heavily that it was almost painful. "Just don't say anything right now."

Maybe it was the adrenaline, or maybe the sedative had a side effect on you, but as soon as he tried to pull you out of the tub completely, your hand slipped down his chest to his groin — your sneaky fingers instantly playing with the buckle of his belt, causing a shaky groan to escape his lips. Dazed, you moved your hand lower to feel the outline of his thick cock getting harder under your touch, but as you were about to unzip his pants, his firm hand stopped you, confusing your cloudy mind and inducing you to raise your eyes to meet his. He could swear no one had ever looked at him like that — so innocently, yet so sinfully. 

"Cupcake, you don't want this," Patrick murmured, removing your hand. "Trust me."

"I do want this!" You replied in a trembling voice, pouting like a child.

"You're so fucking lost right now, you just don't understand," he manhandled you out of the tub and you almost punched him in his beautiful face, but Bateman paid no attention to your attempt to hit him. "Towels, where are they?"

Huffing, he lifted you up, and only then did you calm down, wrapping your hands and legs around him as securely as you could, like you were afraid of falling off the roof of the skyscraper. 

After you pointed at the bathroom counter, Bateman carefully moved towards it to take some big, white towel and wrap it around you — he was drying you off so gently and attentively, it almost made you cry again. 

Emotions were overtaking you.

Patrick didn't even say a word when he was done, he just got another dry towel and swaddled you in it like in a cocoon before carrying you out of the bathroom bridal style. Somehow, he managed to find the way to your bedroom, but once he saw your bed, he scowled and remarked: “Jesus, this bed is so small.”

“I love my bed.” You murmured in reply, hugging his neck and pressing yourself closer against his warm body.

Bateman couldn't help but chuckle in amusement, giving you a brief forehead kiss and sitting you down on the bed. As soon as you lost physical contact with him, you leaned on your elbows, watching him turn around and walk away.

“Patrick! Please, don’t go!” 

Your words echoed inside his head like the most sacred plea, they made him stop and looked in your direction. “I need to remove my clothes since they’re pretty damp,” he checked himself, with a visible disgust on his face. “I’ll be back in a few minutes. Be a good girl, and just wait for me here, okay?”

“Fine.” You mumbled and took the plushy bunny which was resting on your bed next to you.

This scene made him chuckle before he left your bedroom. Now you were completely alone with your thoughts, they didn't wait a second to start eating you from the inside again. With your eyes closed, you lay on your back and began to count.

One, two, three…

What if he lied saying that he would return? Gosh, you wanted him to leave the moment you came here, so why were you getting so upset thinking about him leaving you alone just as you asked him for?

Four, five, six…

The inner voice kept reminding you how many times Patrick has hurt you, how many times he made you cry, how many times you felt like a toy in his hands. You gritted your teeth, pressing your hands against your head to stop thinking.

Seven, eight, nine…

How many times have you promised yourself that you would break out from this circle of lies, pain and suffering? 

“Stop it!” You whimpered, shutting your eyes as firm as you could until the tears started to form.

Ten.

“Stop what?” His voice—it was like a lifeline, like a light in the end of the tunnel, it was everything you needed here and now.

The first thing you saw when you opened your eyes was his almost naked form, namely his toned tiddies and his mouth watering V-line, not to mention his perfect abs and the small trail of hair below his navel.

“For one second I thought you would just leave.” You looked into his hazel eyes, which were partly covered by his messy, brown hair.

“In wet clothes?” He giggled and stepped closer to your bed. It was so hard to ignore the bulge in his tight white underwear, but you tried your best not to stare at it. “Feeling better?"

“Yes, I think y-yes,” you swallowed hard when Bateman sat on the edge of your small bed and drew an invisible line across your ankle. “Can I… ask you for something?”

“You can try.” His voice got lower, sending shivers down your spine.

Panting, you uncovered yourself, putting the towel aside and letting him admire the view of your beautiful body, a pleasure he gladly took, his thirsty eyes roaming all over your curves, especially your full breasts and your inviting neck.

“What do you want, Cupcake?” His hand slides up to your hip, teasing the sensitive skin and making you gasp from need. “Tell me.”

“I need you,” you bit your lower lip, frowning from how embarrassed you were. “I n-need you more than ever.”

With no rush, Bateman bent down to your belly to press a brief kiss which elicited a soft moan to fall from your shaky throat. “Show me where you need me.”

You were about to lost it at any second, as the mind-blowing passion was crashing over you like a fucking tsunami, and you didn’t even know if you would survive this. 

Could that be the moment of no return for both of you?

Stifling a moan, you took his big palm and guided between your opened legs—the sound of his fingers sliding along your oozed folds made you arched your back and you thought your heart would break out from your chest. Your heavy breathes filled up the room, and once you felt his hot lips on your mound, you nearly squeaked, creasing the sheets beneath you.

Patrick was enjoying every second of this moment, savoring the taste of your skin, reveling in all your little salacious noises when he encircled his arms around your legs and swiped his tongue over your throbbing clit.

That was the last drop of your resistance and you couldn't control it anymore, throwing your head back and mewling sensually: “Mmhm, Daddy…! You make me f-feel so good.”

“Are you sure you want this?” His sudden question pierced through your head like an electric pulse.

Gulping, you got up a bit to look down at him, his cheeks, neck and shoulders were already flushed, his hair was disheveled and his eyes were as dark as night.

“Yes,” you responded shortly, feeling a tight knot forming inside your lower abdomen just from being so close to his face. “Taste me, Daddy, please… I want to get lost… in you.”

“I see,” he said, hovering over you for a moment to grab the plushy bunny, then handing it to you with a mischievous grin. "Little girls always keep their favorite toys close?”

As soon as you held the bunny, Bateman got back to his previous position, fondling your hips here and there, then he kissed your inner thigh and put your legs together before bending them and pressing against your chest.

“Stay like that.”

After saying that, he brushed away his wavy locks, spit on your pussy and made several, barely sensible, strokes along your bundle of nerves, his sturdy arms were holding your legs to fixate you in one place as his ministrations were making it hard for you to stay still.

“Awww, P-Patrick,” you keened and squeezed the plush toy in your hand, feeling so dirty yet so high from the way his wet tongue was painting various ornaments on your taut lower lips. “I’m gonna faint…”

“Mmm,” he moaned against your feverish little bud before he took it inside his mouth, sucking it so deliciously that your eyes rolled back into your head, your inner walls were already spasming. “You’re my sweet little Cupcake.”

“Yes! Yes, please!”

Slurping at your soaked cunt, Bateman let you rest your legs on his shoulders and pull on his brown hair as you wanted to bring him even closer, moving your hips towards his face. God, you were such a wet moaning mess and when he shoved his long fingers inside of your dripping slit, you lost connection with reality and ascended to the apex of ecstasy.

His fingers were moving inside and outside of you like a clock-work, so smoothly and fast, since he knew your body so perfectly, it was quite simple for him to find your spongy G - spot. Once he started to stimulate it, your toes began to curve and your whole body was jolting as if you were hit by the eclectic shock.

The moment of your orgasm was as astonishing and relieving as a sip of water in the arid desert. But even after you cummed, Patrick didn’t stop eating you out, fingering you harder, so your juices were gashing around your sweaty bodies, the sheets beneath you were already wet and you didn’t know how you would live tomorrow when he leaves you.

“Mmmmh, I’mma cum again, D-Daddy!” You whimpered, squirming around the bed and pressing the plushy bunny against your face as you were on the verge of tears – overstimulation hitting pretty hard.

Bateman only growled in response and stuffed your soaked pussy with another finger, rhythmically swirling his hot tongue around your throbbing tip while his sneaky hand traced up along your shivering body to grope one of your breasts and pinch your engorged nipple.

“Ahhh—GOSH…! Pat...” Your voice cracked as you cummed so hard all around his face that your wetness was literally running down his chin. But he didn’t care, because the only thing that mattered for him was bringing you as much pleasure as he could.

Even when he was panting heavily against your abused cunt, and he almost couldn't feel his fingers anymore, he continued to lap at your cleft. By that moment your legs were looped around his head and you couldn’t stop twitching even for a second, with each lick he sent millions of tingles to your lower belly.

“Daddy, it’s t-too much… I can’t take it any longer.” You felt so goddamn sensitive, and your body was like jelly at this point.

“C’mon, babydoll,” he groaned in a raspy voice after he pulled on your clit with a nasty squeal. “You can give Daddy another one, can't you baby? For me, please?"

This time Patrick buried his tongue as deep inside your womb as he could, licking you from the inside out. He repeated the motion, making you climax countless times in a row, until your little frame couldn't bear it anymore. Soon, you drifted off with a smile of joy on your face, holding the plushy bunny close to your chest. Long time ago that toy was your only friend, but now it seemed like you have become a toy yourself. But unlike the plush bunny, it was obvious that you weren't the only toy for your owner.

Why did it hurt so good to be alive?

You heard a faint voice calling you and asking for help, but no matter how hard you tried to follow it and find it—all you could see was darkness before your eyes. Scared, you moved along the dark alley, surrounded by shadows, shivering from the abnormal cold, and for a second you even thought you were already dead. But when the voice called you again, you finally realized that it was your inner voice, but it sounded so sad, even compared to your darkest days.

"How did you end up like this, (y/n)?" Your own reflection spoke to you, each word cutting through your heart like a dagger. "You're so pathetic and weak, what would Mom and Dad say if they knew about your 'successful' life in New York?"

Frowning, you closed your hands around your ears to stop this madness, but the more you tried to ignore it, the louder the voice became in your head.

"Look what you've done to yourself! Do you really think he cares about you?" 

"Leave me alone!" You yelled at your shadow copy and ran down the alley, but there seemed to be no escape.

"Wake the fuck up! Bateman is just using you for his own needs, and you let him treat you like a fucking toy. Being in debt to him is not an excuse!" You could hear it even with your ears closed and there was nowhere to hide.

"SHUT UP!" You sped up, the cold air hitting your face mercilessly, but you didn't care. "Get out of my head!"

God, it was so fucking absurd to argue with yourself.

Perplexed and scared, you suddenly realized that the faster you were running the louder your inner voice was getting, bringing you a sharp headache as if a million needles cut into your brain at once. It hurt really bad.

“Patrick! Patrick, where are you?” You cried out as the darkness was clouding around you with each passing second. “Please, I need you…” A single tear slid down your warm cheek when you felt your lungs burning from the lack of oxygen as though you were drowning. “Pat-Patrick…”

Slowly closing your eyes, you let the void consume you, which actually brought you some relief, because now you were free from pain and sorrow, reveling in the sweet space of non-existence.

A loud gasp bounced against the walls of your small bedroom, signaling of your eventual awakening. Panting, you sat on the bed only to see Bateman’s sleepy form next to you—he was sleeping like a baby, laying on his back and sniffling from time to time. Shocked, you were trying your best to regain your composure and steady your heavy breathing, not even noticing that you were drenched in sweat. 

Quietly, you slipped out from under the covers to find yourself completely naked, so the next thing you did was find something to put on. Subsequently, you rushed inside your small bathroom and saw Bateman’s clothes drying off on the battery—the memories of the recent events flashed across your mind like a slow-motion movie. First, you were taking a bath—which was still full of cold water—then you nearly drowned but Patrick came in time and literally saved you. The next flashbacks made you lean on the sink and hold back your breath—his eager mouth on your cunt, forcing you to lose your mind and cum again and again until you eventually drifted off. 

Jesus Christ.

Embarrassed, you quickly opened the water and washed your face several times until you cooled down a bit. After you regain your composure, you fasten your terry robe and head to the kitchen as you were so starved that you even had a stomach ache. 

New York was already awake, and the sun was high above the horizon, shining so brightly in the windows that you had to close your blinds and thank God it was Sunday and you didn't have to go to the office because your head was spinning due the aftereffect of your sedative pills. Speaking of them—once you saw the jar with pills on the kitchen counter you threw it into the rubbish without any second thought, yet you didn’t want Bateman to know that he had an influence on your decision. When you closed the door to the kitchen, you accidentally slammed it harder than you should have, and it cracked so loudly that it sounded like a bundle of dishes broke at the same time.

"Damn it!" You cursed to yourself, pressing a palm to your face, certain that the noise would wake Bateman up.

Panicking a bit, you retreated to your bedroom and as soon as you stepped in you saw the man of your dreams stretching out and yawning so adorable, that for a moment you just froze in your place, not capable of taking your eyes off from Bateman’s disheveled hair and his broad chest.

With a low growl, Patrick pulled the blanket away and finally noticed you. "Woah, Cupcake, was that you?" The man chuckled, casually flexing his muscles as he looked at the mirror next to the door where you were standing. "I thought something had exploded outside."

Abashed, you quickly adjusted your robe from his piercing gaze. "Sorry, I can be really..."

"Clumsy?" Smiling broadly, Bateman leaned back against the headboard and crossed his arms. 

"Yes, clumsy," you tugged with your fingers, briefly glancing down—damn, he seemed to be the only person who could embarrass you so easily. "Well...do you want anything?"

"Hmmm, let me think," Patrick hummed before he thoughtfully pressed a finger to his plump lips. "I probably have something on my mind," Bateman gave you a mischievous grin when he saw your curious look and smoothed his golden brown hair. "How about a morning blowjob?" Your instant reaction was a mixture of anger and embarrassment, which made the man's face look even more smug. "Relax! I'm joking." 

Of course he wasn't joking—you knew it and couldn't stop yourself from rolling your eyes and crossing your arms over your chest. "I'd pretend I didn't hear that," you said, finally looking away from his sturdy body. "How about breakfast?"

"That sounds really good."

Shocked, you took a moment to think about the possible options you could cook for him since you didn’t really expect him to give you a positive answer. “I can offset you with a scrambled egg and some fresh orange juice.”

With a satisfied grin, the man slowly got up from your modest bed and stretched his muscles again; he was definitely making it on purpose. “Oh, that’s nice,” he almost groaned when he cocked his head to one side then to another. “I can’t say the same about your bed, Cupcake… you should change the mattress if you want to keep walking with a straight back.”

And though Patrick was lamenting, you could say he said it almost affectionately—as if he really cared about you, yet you brushed this conclusion off as fast as your heart was pounding right now when the man got closer to you; his tall, massive frame towered over you like a mountain.

“I also would like to have a shower, if…there’s such an option,” Bateman smirked and briefly traced a finger along your cheek, coaxing you to close your eyes for a second and revel in the soft sensation of his touch. “Did you sleep well?”

A sudden question that fell from his lips like a suffocated gasp, a tender stroke on your shoulder and you were already melting as Patrick knew what he was doing, every touch, every glance of his brown hypnotic eyes was deliberate and smooth, leaving you no chance but to surrender to his demand.

“Yes, I slept like a baby, though I can hardly remember the things that happened before I blacked out,” you lied with an embarrassed smile. “You can have a shower and use whatever soaps and towels you’ll see.” Thee more you talked the more his lips curled, especially when you allowed him to bring you closer into his embrace. “But don’t expect anything extraordinary.”

“I won’t, I promise,”  the man chuckled and playfully pinched your ass. “Sleeping beauty.”

With that, Patrick walked past you, leaving you alone for a moment, giving you a chance to pull yourself together. And when you seemed to relax, a thought of his clothes that had been left in the bathroom popped up in your mind. ‘Oh God, I forgot!’

Nervously, you rushed after Patrick into your bathroom to see that the door was already closed, implying that he was inside and probably naked, though you couldn’t hear the sound of flowing water. Embarrassed, you coughed quietly and knocked several times.

“Yeah?” Bateman’s muffled voice echoed through the door. 

“Patrick, I…” a short pause turned into a breathless gasp. “If you’re not already in the shower, may I come in?”

After a moment, the door in front of you opened and you saw Patrick wrapped in a white towel. “Something wrong?”

“No,” you giggled nervously and sneaked inside the bathroom to quickly grab his clothes. “I just wanted to iron your…suit and stuff, while you’re in the shower…” Quickly, you hovered his garments over your arm and walked past him, hoping he wouldn’t ask any questions, despite his surprised expression. “I’m so sorry for dumping your clothes yesterday.”

With these words, you deftly avoid his grasp as you knew he’d definitely try to make you embarrassed even more. “(Y/n)!”

“Take a shower. I’ll make you breakfast as I promised.” 

This time, the man didn’t try to catch you or follow you, thankfully. So, you could safely make it to your living room where you set an ironing board and put his shirt first to iron. Wrapped in thoughts, you didn’t even notice how carefully you were ironing his clothes, you couldn’t even remember doing the same with your stuff but maybe you were just scared of ruining it since everything he wore was utterly expensive. ‘This suit probably costs like my monthly rent.’ Sighing, you put the shirt aside when you heard the water flowing sound and your mind instantly gave you an image of Patrick’s naked body, enveloped in steam and slightly flush from the heat. ‘Damn, I should stop or I'm gonna ruin something.’ When it was time to iron his tie, you ran your finger along the smooth red fabric, draped in beautiful intricate patterns—you couldn't deny that you had a thing for his ties, for all of them—you smiled to yourself before bringing it to your lips, you could still feel his cologne on it. This tantalizing scent was driving you crazy, it fit him so perfectly as if it was made specially for him, but even if that was true, you wouldn’t be surprised at all, regarding how rich this man was. The moment you finished ironing his pants, you seemed to hear his voice coming from the bathroom. ‘Perfect timing.’

Slightly tensed, you stopped next to the door. “Patrick? Did you call me?” When he didn’t reply, you became even more stirred, so without really caring about seeing him naked, you opened the door and stepped in. “Patrick?” Since your bathroom was much smaller than his, you bumped into his massive frame, squealing in surprise. “Oh God, sorry!”

“Oh, Cupcake,” he wrapped his hands around your shoulders before carefully cupping your face. “I hope you didn’t break your nose against my firm chest?”

Frowning, you gave him a dead glare but he only snickered back. “What happened? Why did you call me?”

“Do you have an extra toothbrush for me? I’ll buy you another one and…”

You stopped him halfway and removed his hands to stroll to the sink and opened the cabinet above it. “Here. There’s also a razor if you need.”

Smirking, Bateman sneaked behind you and pressed his wet body against yours. “Do ya think I need to shave?” He rubbed the mirror from steam to check himself, sliding a hand along his chiseled chin.

“I…I don’t know…I just thought in case you need to, the razor is here.”

“Mhm…” he hummed and before you knew it he nuzzled against your exposed neck, forcing you to gasp and stepped back right into his embrace, just like he planned it. “Does that tickle, Cupcake?” 

‘Dear Lord, please give me the strength to survive this.’

Staying still, you just swallowed hard and let him continue to attack your neck, which he did with precious care before, but now, Patrick also used his mouth and teeth, and that was already too much.

"I think you definitely have some stubble," you laughed, trying to turn it into a joke. But as soon as you tried to walk away, he pulled you back into his strong arms, and that was not funny. "Breakfast Patrick, I have to make breakfast, did you forget?"

"Not really, but I need your help."

"Help?"

The man gave you a devilish smile before lifting you up and sitting you on the bathroom counter, not even giving you a chance to protest. Then Bateman took the shaving cream, checking the brand name skeptically, but then averting his eyes, probably thinking it was better not to know. With deliberate, calculated movements, he applied the cream to his cheekbones, moving up and down his face. The sight was something you never thought you'd find so damn hot that you didn't even make a sound, just watched him carefully prepare to shave.

"Have you ever seen a man shave, darling?" Patrick asked in a cheeky tone, surely noticing the way you were staring at him.

You shook your head. “No,” you shamelessly checked on him, following the little buds of water slipping down his torso. “God, this is such a silly question, don’t you think?”

Instead of answering, Bateman flexed his muscles while watching in the mirror and missing the way you rolled your eyes. “Well, now you finally have a chance.” The man winked at you and grabbed the razor. “You know, I really like your place, it’s pretty clean.”

“You already said that.”

“Oh, did I?”

“Yes,” you crossed your arms and turned away just the moment when the man started to glide the razor against his jawline—you thought the blade would become blunt because his cheekbones were too sharp—his every action was smooth and skillful. “That was the first thing you said when we came in.”

“That only means that it’s really very clean here.”

Huffing, you fixed your robe and cursed to yourself, ‘Why does he always have to be like this?’

Opening the faucet, Patrick cleaned his face after the last stroke of the razor. “Can you check here?” 

Confused, you gave him a questioning gaze when he turned halfway, pointing at the apex of his jaw. Sheepishly, you touched his freshly shaved skin, feeling a slight prickly sensation. “I think it’s still a bit stubbly.” 

“Aha,” Bateman acknowledged and quickly took your hand in his big one, briefly kissing the top of it and giving you the razor. “I told you, I’d need your help, Cupcake.” “How do you even do it yourself?”

“The razors I use are much sharper than this one, honey,” he chuckled but once you placed the razor against his skin he stopped moving. “Just be careful.”

The last phrase struck a chord inside your chest and you even stopped for a moment to take a deep breath before you eventually began to shave the rest of the stubble. All the while, Patrick would glance at you attentively, his hazel irises like hypnotizing spirals, so you forced yourself to stay focused on the razor and the patch of his skin still covered in a shaving cream.

“You have such soft skin,” you mumbled mostly to yourself but you were sure he heard it. “It’s so pleasurable to touch.”

“(Y/n),” he suddenly called out your name in a stern voice. “I think we should talk about yesterday.” “No…”

"Listen to me," he grabbed the hand that held the razor and pushed it to the side. "You should stop taking that sedative."

“It was just an accident.” 

“You could die, Cupcake…”

"I...I know...I owe you for saving me," you finally stated, releasing your hand to finish shaving him. "But let me take care of my life."

“Ouch.”

“Oh my God! Did I hurt you?” You jolted in panic, almost dropping the razor as if you were hit by the electric shot.

“Yes, you did,” Bateman glided a palm along his now perfectly shaved cheeks. “With your words.”

Letting out a sad sigh, you put the razor into the sink next to you and reached for another towel for him as you watched him washing his face. The more you kept silent, the more palpable the tension was getting in the air and after a brief moment of contemplating, you decided that the best option now was just to go to the kitchen and cook.

“Toothbrush is here.” You murmured and got up from the bathroom counter, about to leave but Patrick stopped you. 

First, you glanced down at his grasp around your wrist, then you raised your eyes to meet his walnut ones, now they were absolutely dark and demanding. Inch by inch, the man was getting closer, soon you could feel the fresh scent of your soap on his wet skin as he pressed you along his broad form, one hand rested on the small of your back, while another snaked beneath your robe to outline one of your hard peaks, which were visible through the fabric.

“Pat-Patrick…”

“No more ‘Daddy’ again, huh?” he whispered into your ear, playing with your stray lock. “Do you remember how many times you called me like that last night?”

‘No! I don’t remember, I shouldn’t remember this, I…’

“...your sweet voice sounded so good with all these little dirty pleas, ‘Daddy, don’t stop, mmhm-please!’ Uhhh, that was really something,” Bateman crooned against your neck, forcing you to step back until he trapped you between his massive body and bathroom counter. “Got you.”

There was nothing to say more, once his warm mouth latched on yours, the urge to deny him fading with every second of the kiss, especially when Patrick savagely sucked on your lower lip and drew his tongue across it as if asking for permission to slip inside.

Gasping, you instinctively inclined your head to the side for a moment and the man used it for showering your delicate neck with little peeks which then transformed into wet, red marks. This sweet torture could last forever if you suddenly didn’t press your palm against his naked chest in a determined way.

“We can’t,” you protested when he got down to kiss you again. “You’re engaged, don’t you think it’s so mean to…cheat on your fiance?”

The man couldn’t hold back a scoff. “What does that have to do with anything? You owe me, Cupcake, you owe me a lot.” 

Annoyed, you made an attempt to push him away, but you obviously failed as Patrick was too strong, looming over you like a mountain. “If you mean the last time—I already thanked you and moreover, I didn’t ask you to do it, you know?” You watched his face changing into something more impish, the corners of his lips curled up as if everything was happening according to his plan. “You always decide for me…maybe it’s time to stop?”

Bateman chuckled. “Maybe it’s time to finally open your eyes?”

“Are you…really telling me this?!”

“You owe me a pretty big sum of money,” the man suddenly turned the conversation in another way. “And we had a deal…” Carefully, he trailed his finger along your cheek like an artist admiring his most precious creation. “Do you think I’d be so patient with your bad attitude to me if I were not really into you, hmm?”

The last words made you swallow hard and turned away for a moment, as you were on the verge of tears. Did he really just confirm that there was some kind of affection for you from his side?

“I…I know I owe a lot of money, but believe me, I’ll back them soon,” you removed his arms from your waist but the next second, Patrick placed them on the bathroom counter behind you from both sides, not allowing you to go away. “Please, believe me.”

“I don’t need that fucking money,” Patrick barked and unexpectedly gripped your shoulders, but when he noticed the glowing fear in your eyes, the man loosened his grasp and cupped your face. “I need you. Both your body and soul.”

Closing your eyes, you wanted to sink through the ground. “You want me to do things that you can’t buy with money…” you declared with a chilling coldness in your voice. “Other women are okay with being your toys, but I’m not. Now, let's finish this conversation, it won’t lead to anything.”

A tired sigh broke out from Bateman’s broad chest and for a second he even thought to let you go and turned over the page of the story of two broken souls, who met themselves so suddenly. Maybe now was that exact moment he was waiting so long, the moment to open the cards and confess, even though Patrick could hardly believe it would work.

"You don't seem to be listening to me at all," was all the man could say. "And that's not surprising, since no one really listens to me. Because...uhh...because no one really cares about what really bothers me…" He let you go and stepped back. "And you...I thought you were the only person who...who actually tried to understand me and act naturally."

"Patrick..."

He raised his hand in an eloquent gesture to let him continue. "You probably did it all because of the debt, but...I'll be honest, sometimes I made myself believe that you weren't acting like this just because of the money."

"Is this another manipulation?" You asked bluntly, holding back your tears. "How could I believe you after all the things you did to me? How many times did you treat me like a puppet that you no longer wanted to play with? And not to mention that you turned out to be engaged!" You grabbed your head and leaned against the bathroom counter, massaging your temples. "This is already too much."

The man huffed and cautiously approached you. With a soft, feathery movement, he touched your hands and pulled them away from your strained face. "At least you seem to care that I'm engaged," he said abruptly, moving you closer so that your head was now pressed against his massive chest. "I know it's overwhelming, (y/n). But..." the words suddenly stuck in his throat like a lump. "You're not alone in this." Patrick urged curly, running his large palm along the crown of your head before resting his chin on it, inhaling the scent of your soft hair. 

‘Not alone’, you repeated inside your head and looked up into his brown eyes, which were now so stern and contemplative—you have never seen them like that before. This man, oh God, this man was such a mess, he was making you lose the ground beneath your feet with his sudden confessions, but in the end, actions spoke louder than words, even though you wanted to believe him and sink into the strong feeling you had towards him—you simply couldn’t allow yourself to get lost in him as you would burn out like a match.

All the while you were standing like that, Bateman was hoping you would say something in return, but when you didn’t, he just released you from his embrace without saying a thing. Overwhelmed by emotions, you left the bathroom and let him finish his hygienic routine in private.

A bit later, you didn’t even remember how you cooked a breakfast for both of you, the only thing you did remember was his positive comment that it tasted pretty good. You couldn’t help but smile, though your plate still stood untouched. Patrick noticed that, but didn’t make any comments about that.

“To be honest, I really didn’t expect it to be that nice,” he chuckled and finished his glass of mineral water that he didn’t really like. Quickly checking his Rolex, which he wore right after he took a shower, he added, “I’m afraid it’s time for me to go. Can you please bring me my clothes?”

“Sure.” You raised up and quickly strolled to the iron board where his suit and shirt were waiting to be presented to their owner. “Here, I ironed them for you.”

Bateman froze in shock for a moment. “You…ironed them?”

“Uh, yes, but I did it very carefully, I know everything you wear is utterly expensive,” you gave him his garments and he started to examine every thing with meticulous attention. “I…I thought you wouldn’t like to go outside in rumpled clothes.”

"That's… that's very sweet of you, Cupcake. Really…" he replied, his blush barely noticeable to anyone but you. "Thanks…thanks for everything."

“You’re welcome.” You murmured shyly, crossing your arms over the chest and watching him getting up from the table and walking to your bedroom to dress up.

Moments later, you both were standing in your small hallway, Patrick fixing his tie and coat, looking at his reflection in the mirror.

“How do I look?” He asked nonchalantly, putting on the headphones of his Walkman.

Slightly upset, you leaned against the wall, your eyes gliding up and down his elegant, tall silhouette; the way the dark blue trench coat sat on his broad shoulders made you almost gasp in admiration.

“Perfect as always,” you stepped closer to adjust the collar of his shirt. “You’re like a Vogue cover which came alive.”

Fluttered, Bateman smiled and caught your hand to place a kiss on top of it. “And I always believe your compliments, they are so…sincere or…” he paused and looked into your eyes. “...or I’m just fooling myself.”

His usual chuckling now was less happy and it stirred something inside of you, so when you got up on your toes to kiss his cheek, Patrick took it like another chance to be intimate with you. With unhidden tenderness, the man pulled you into his arms to seal your mouths with a soft but passionate kiss which brought some unexpected relief for both of you.

“You know, I…I really appreciate your courage to be open with me,” you suddenly confessed when he broke the kiss, still holding you close. “It’s just that I need some time to think over things and…my life is such a mess.”

"Oh, you don't have to tell me that," Bateman sneered ironically to himself. "Since I know who made your life so messy," he stopped you from saying anything else by pressing his finger to your lips. Then the man slowly leaned down so that your foreheads now touched in the most intimate way. "Promise me you won't take those pills again."

"And you promise me you won't say things like no one gives a fuck about you," you gripped his arm, rubbing his firm bicep under the soft fabric of his coat. "Because I do give a fuck about you, even though I don't really like it."

"We'll talk about...us. That's the only promise I can make right now."

"Us?"

"You heard what I said," he pinched your nose, just like after the fashion show. "I'll call you today and Cupcake?" He leaned down to whisper in your ear, accidentally brushing his nose against your neck. "You're always on my mind, but I still haven't decided if it's good or not." The way he used your words to tease you brought a broad smile to your face, but the next time, all joy faded as the man stroked your cheek one last time before stepping aside to check himself in the mirror. "Hope to see you soon, darling."

With that he closed the door behind him and as much as you hated saying goodbye, you hated the moments like that, when you couldn’t control yourself as your emotions peaked, causing your knees to buckle and you stopped yourself from falling down only because you managed to lean on the nearby wall. The whole thing about your relationship with Bateman was one big mistake, as you would never find yourself belonging to this world—your meeting was a joke of fate—no less to say. Although you knew it, your heart was like a rebellion who refused to listen, to obey, to accept the truth that there were no chances to turn this situation in a way that would help these relationships to become healthy and normal. ‘Normal, huh? Do yuppies even know such a word?’ Laughing ironically to yourself, you got up and went back into your kitchen to wash the dishes. The sight of Patrick sitting here with a glass of water in his hand was still so fresh in your mind, but now you began to doubt if that really had happened. 

All day later, you couldn’t sleep, you couldn’t eat, waiting for his call but he never did it. It was not surprising after the shit that man had done, but today you were really hoping he would keep his word. But your hopes were broken to pieces again, in the most brutal possible way because you really decided to give it a try and believed him.

When the night came to New York City, you were standing in your living room with a cup of freshly brewed coffee, thinking about what would you do next and trying to think less about what Patrick was doing right now…and even less about with whom he probably could be. ‘...with Courtney or maybe with his fiance, Evelyn?’ You snickered sadly to yourself and finished your drink. Coffee was supposed to help you to keep awake but instead it only made you even more sleepy, so you didn’t even realize how you fell asleep on your little couch while putting down the notes of how today’s day had gone in your diary.

The next moment you were awakened by the sudden doorbell, which caught you off guard and even scared you a bit as you didn’t wait for anyone. Quickly enveloping your robe, you got up and saunted to the door to look at the peephole—you would lie to yourself if you said you weren’t expecting someone specific, but when you saw nothing but flowers, your heart skipped a beat. 

With one swift motion, you opened the door and an unknown guy instantly greeted you with a polite tone. “Good morning, miss (y/n),” he then handed you a big bouquet of red and white roses—it was so heavy you could barely hold it. “Uh, can you please put your sign here?”

Confused, you pressed the flowers to your chest to see the man’s face. “Are you… are you sure it’s for me?”

The courier only smiled and giggled. “Of course, but you can check the address, if you want,” the man showed you the paper with the order details. “We make no mistakes, miss, that’s why our service is the best around New York.”

“I see,” you responded and put your signature on the place he pointed you. “But, can I ask you who sent me this?”

“There’s a card inside if I’m not mistaken,” the courier replied and with that he put the paper inside his bag. “Have a good day, ma'am.”

“Thanks.” 

With that, you closed the door and somehow proceeded into your living room where you put the bouquet on the coffee table and began to look for the vase for it. When you managed to find it, you poured some water and placed the flowers into it, then you remembered the courier’s words about the card and the next second you were already leafing through the flowers. Soon, a small white card caught your attention and when you picked it out, the first thing you noticed was two beautiful letters—P.B. in the end of the text which said: 

“Good morning, my sweet Cupcake, 

I’m sorry I didn’t call you tonight, I was extremely busy and didn’t really have any free time, but I hope this little gift would cheer you up a bit. What do you think about going to a yacht club these weekends? I’m looking forward to hearing from you soon. 

Utterly yours, P.B.” 

Your hands began to shake the moment you finished reading, but you managed to regain your composure. Driven by the unbridled happiness inside your chest, you leaned down to inhale the sweet scent of flowers—God, it felt like a dream. And speaking of dreaming—you were still so sleepy that after you finally calmed down, you decided to come back into the bed and nap a little bit longer. The sheets were still smelling of him, coaxing you to rub your face against the pillows and imagine him being here with you and somehow, you finally realized how deep this man was rooted inside your heart. ‘Utterly yours…’ You kept replaying these words inside your head until you drifted off to another dream, but this time, it was not a nightmare, but a heaven where Patrick was only yours, and you were his only one.

Thank you for the reading!🖤 [MAIN M-LIST]🪓[SWEET LIKE A CUPCAKE M-LIST]🪓[KO-FI]

[agirlandherquill]

through the puddles of ink

since it's a new academic year, a new chapter of my life and i thought, since i've been on tumblr for around eight months now that it's about time i properly introduced myself - this would shock the person i was when i first started this blog, but as it's grown so have i, and i think university has indefinitely helped my confidence - so, without further ado, here goes i'll start this properly by explaining the title of this post - through the puddle of ink

ink is important because obviously it is the basis of literature, the foundation of stories and fitting to my blog name, you dip the quill in the ink to write, to forge an adventure that tests the imagination and takes a reader to wonderful places and puddles because let's face it, ink is messy, ink is chaotic, just like me, my characters, and my writing and because through the looking glass is a very iconic title i also watched that movie in the cinema years ago, i took inspiration, and here we are now - this post is a reflection of me, the beautiful nightmares and writing gremlins that co-exist within my brain and a way for me to get to better know my mutuals, anyone and everybody on writeblr!

here comes the scary part - only for me, and my semi-awkward self - introducing myself, i've never been very good at this stuff so bear with me - and have mercy on my nervous soul,

for the longest time i've loved the sort of self-imposed anonymity of this blog, and don't get me wrong i still do adore my blog name but I thought it was about time I properly introduced myself, so, let me just shuffle some papers in the library of my mind, find the right phrasing for this and... (cue angry hitting of the keyboard) hello! my name is Erin and i'm a writer, a lover of chaos, and a semi-functioning tempest somehow existing within society - i love and ramble about lots of different things - books, shows, songs, you name it, i can waffle and sometimes i can waffle well (that is how i am now going to describe my writing, because it feels like it fits so well)

phew, i got that out, that tiny paragraph was a lot of effort (and i've beaten writers block more often than i can count)

this little post might not seem like much, but to me it's a lot, and i'm happy to have made it this far, and i'm so looking forward to continuing to grow alongside this blog and writeblr (i love you all, no seriously)

and now onto some very much needed rambling about my works, because there's a lot the lovely folk of writeblr are yet to know (and it will come, in time, but here's what i can say for now)

Ruin's Reprisal - we all know the tale of this, my oldest, most functioning (cough, using that term loosely) work - well, where to start? well, i'm on the final stage of proofreading, and once that's all done i'm hoping (let's be honest, dreaming,) to have the final draft complete and out in the great wide world come christmas/new year (that is a courageous goal, even for me, but who knows, maybe i can pull it off, just maybe)

A Deal Of Daggers - it's almost time for nanowrimo, which marks two years since the idea for this first came to me, and i cannot wait to spend autumn working on it (not that i am participating in nano properly this year, what with student-life obligations, but i'm going to write what i can) and i've been steadily chipping away with a few chapters already

those are my two main works, and probably the only works i've been focusing on over the last couple of months - and i've fallen completely and wholeheartedly in love with them all over again, as i do, every single time i open the files on scrivener

as far as my tired but over-eager to write brain can think this should be it for everything i wanted to include in this post until the next post (which won't be long, i can guarantee it),

~ Erin, A Girl and Her Quill, or whatever this hellscape would like to call me :)

~ ~ ~

now for the tag list! (i forgot to add it when i posted, oops!)

(p.s if you'd like to be included/notified too, interact with this post :))

@humbly-a-doppelganger @imawholeassmood @frostedlemonwriter @yrndrgn @abditorywriting

@riveriafalll @lead-to-code @casualsuitturtle @floweryprosegarden @joeys-piano

@catwingsathena @godsmostfuckedupgoblin @nothoughtsjustmhaandotherthings @anaisbebe

@drchenquill @leahnardo-da-veggie @tiredpapergirl @pastelpinkhobbies

[lashysdomain]

Sing me a Song of Scrutiny

Book of Songs Solitude | Sympathy | Success | Scrutiny | Sentiment: Saccharine • Shattered | Severing

The night after Artinos' win has been one of the best he's had in a long time- well, you know, other than ACTUALLY winning. 

Apologies and understanding had been reached the night before, along with the plans for celebration. Arti wanted to let his crew go get a good rest in order to party as hard as they could the next night, with Justya having planned the place and time for everyone.

The past few hours had been spent at a high end bar- one of the few Arti hasn't been kicked out of for his weird requests- and as the evening wound down those still up for it made their way to a bowling alley.

Flopping down in their lanes seating Arti takes a deep breath, combing hands through his curled hair; it’s already lost a lot of its bounce, but with how quickly it usually leaves his straight hair he's happy it's even there at all. Just as he's settling into his rest the harsh buzzing of phone against plastic startles him, his crew glancing back at their boss to make sure he's alright before returning to the game.

Fumbling the phone out of his pocket Arti answers, getting up and walking away to take the call in a more private area to not bother the others.

"Hello?"

"Ah- Good. You're still alive," Arti's heart skips a beat hearing the voice on the other end, putting a hand to his mouth to hide that he's smiling. "I've been trying to contact you about your cars extended warranty."

The violet laughs, leaning against a wall while his hand plays with one of the dying curls. "Yeah? That's all? You okay Isatol?"

"I'm fine. I just wanted to check on you since you've been out for so long. I tried to call you a few times earlier but I never got a response, so I got worried."

Oh, right. His phone had rung at the bar an hour into the festivities, but he'd just silenced it. Probably would have been smarter to at least text the person back, oops.

"Ah- Yeah, we were only just getting started... I forgot you don't go to this kinda thing... I'll probably still be here for a few hours."

"Oh.... Alright." Isatol's disappointment is obvious, words briefly catching in Arti's throat at the thought. "Just make sure you come back soon, alright Artinos?"

He stiffens slightly- Isatol always calls him Arti- almost never his full name. Is he that upset? Maybe it has been long enough... Maybe he should go back home.... Isatol asked so nicely, after all....

Wait, but he didn't actually, did he? He didn't ask... Why did he think Isatol had asked him to come home? If anything it sounded like a statement-

The sound of something clicking through the phone snaps Arti out of his momentary brain jumble. "Ah... Y.. Yeah, just a little longer, promise."

Hanging up without a second thought the disoriented feeling the call leaves Arti with brings him back over to his crews lane, slumping back down into his previous seat still looking at his phone on the missed calls screen. Jeez…. One hundred and seventy nine calls? What was Isatol thinking?

"Arti?" Justya's voice startles him, the violet giving her a big silly grin of reassurance but his moirail isn't so easily tricked by the usual idiocy. "Who was that on the phone?"

"Oh uh... It was Isatol.... He was worried because I've been out so long."

"I mean… yeah, we're out celebrating your first win. What'd he think, we'd say hi, do a cheer, and be done?" They roll their eyes, dropping into the seat beside him with a huff. "Clingy much…"

Arti laughs, slinging an arm over his rails shoulders and pulling them close for a half hug. "Yeah yeah.... He's not used to me being out ya know? I'm usually either training or at home.... He tried to call earlier, and didn't get an answer so that's probably part of it..."

"Yeah well he's gonna have to get used to it if he's serious about you," their tone gives way from disdain to annoyance, something Arti's gotten used to hearing when the topic of his mate comes up, "If you start placing high more and more we're going to be in the spotlight, taking on bigger races. You're only going to get busier."

"I'm already busy, silly. He knows most of what I do is always work…. I should probably head back soon though… If I actually play I'm absolutely going to make an idiot out of myself.."

Justya shakes her head, grabbing Arti by the arm to drag him to his feet. "Nuh uh, you're staying and going to look stupid with the rest of us. This is a party for you as much as for us. You're the one behind the wheel."

Whining Arti tries to pull away back to the safety of his seat, lips puckering inward as he thinks of something and struggles to not burst out laughing. "Noooo! You can't do this to me! I'm good with wheels, not balls!"

"I can and will. You're playing at least 1 game." The fact Justya can't contain their own amusement breaks the thin veil keeping his laughter inside, the poor idiot stumbling forward onto the lane, one of the crew shoving a ball into his arms.

Maybe going home can wait for a while.

But he asked so nicely…

[rei-does-stuff]

MAKE YOUR MARK CHAPTER 6 LIVE BLOG BABYYYYYYYY

EPISODE 1!!!!!!

-FIRSTLY I’ve been so fucking excited for this that I dreamt about it THATS RIGHT I DREAMT ABT IT

-This is gonna be the last mym chapter….:(((((

-OKOK LETS STARTT

-NO MORE SPARKY TRANSFORMING THE NETFLIX LOGO :((((

-MANESTREAM!!!

-SIBLING BONDING I LOVE THEM

-“Hold onto your cutie marks!” IN MORE WAYS THAN ONE SUNNY

-AAAA THE INTRO ITS THE LAST TIME WELL HERE THE INTRO!!!

-PIPPP YA GOTTA STOPPP

-I love you izzyyyyy

-HOW THE HELL DID SHE BLOW THOSE SO FAST, strong fuckin lungs

-BLAIZE!!!!

-All the dragons have the same model yes, but they all still look unique and pretty good IN MOTION

-OH SUNNY IS TERRIFIED

-Aww trying to put on her tough voice this is why ur my favorite sunny!!!

-AWW IZZYYYY

-I LOVE LUXXE

-Leaf is cuteee

-Tumble and him are def gay

-FOUNTAIN IS A LITTLE CREATURE….Well big creature but yk

-PIPPS FACEEE

-OH SO THEY HAVE THE SAME SHIT AS SPARKY

-OPALINEEEEE

-OOO SONG

-HER VOICE IM IN LOVE

-God that was sooo goodddd

-Love sunny rushing in to defend alicorns

-Also her putting her hoof around zipp GAYYYY

-MISTY I LOVE YOUU

-Hitch and your dad jokes I love youu

-Sunny trying to make friends with Blaize, IS THAT A PERSONALITY I SEE?

-Also her and Blaize? Rlly gay

-Love this green dragon (already forgot his name im a little dumb)

-SPIKEEE

-OH HIS VOICE WILL TAKE A WHILE TO GET USED TO BUT ITS NOT BAD, he finally has the deep voice he’s always wanted, good on you for the transition, plus he is total nonbinary goals

-AWW SAME HUMOR!!

-Also Sunny fangirling a bit

-AWW HE DOESNT REMEMBER :(

-TWILIGHT MENTION

-AW HIS LIL ‘Twi?’ OUGHHH

-okok so we were all pretty right on the real story!

-“You lost magic??” LMAO EVEN SPIKE IS LIKE ‘rlly???? After everything you rlly lost magic yall are wild mannn”

-When sunny gets excited her alicorn-ness starts to show, I’m not saying its a stim but it’s totally a stim

-AWW SUNNY REMINDS HIM OF TWILIGHT AAAA

-Love his speech but I wish they referenced how he thought the same but realized his true family were with other ponies

-GAYYY i need to see ship art of sunny and Blaize NOW

-ALSO WHY ARE YOU ON HER BACK SUNNY YOU CAN FLY, MORE REASON WHY SHES GAY

-YOU TWO PIPP AND ZIPP YOU CAN FLY!!!

-OUFHHHH THAT WAS SOOO GOOD!!!!

OKOK NEXT EP

EP 2

-TWO PARTER BABYY

-NO NOT THE TOGETHERNESS TREE

-The townsponies still freak just the same as g4, some things never change

-SPROUT

-‘And Pipp’s hair is still fabulous!’ I LOVE YOU ROCKY

-YEA MISTY WOULD KNOW

-LOVE THIS SPEECH UGHHH

-“That is…An option!” SUNNY DONT BE MEAN

-AWWW IM GONNA CRY

-PRINCESS SUNNY AAA

-FILLY MISTY

-‘SHE DOESNT KNOW HOW TO CHECK HER MESSAGES’ HAHAH

-NOOOO NOT THE DRAGONS

-SPARKY YOU ARE ON YOUR OWN

-OHH SHE KNEW SHE FUCKING KNEW MISTY BETRAYED HER

-GET HER ASS ANIMAL FRIENDS

-OOO YAY THE DRAGONS ARE BACK

-OOP NEVERMIND

-YES HITCH GET HER ASS

-OUGH SUNNY UNDERSTANDING HOW AFRAID MISTY MUST BE TO SEE HER ABUSER AGAIN AAAAA

-AAAAAA THAT WAS SOO GOOD

NEXT EP NEXT EP

EP 3!!!

-GRAB HITCHS CUTIE MARK MISTYY

-YESSS GO MISTY

-GET HER ASS

-GO AFTER YOUR GIRLFRIEND SUNNY

-OO PIPP YOU SMART

-WELL IT WORKED FOR A SEC

-UGHH I LOVE THIS INTERACTION BETWEEN MISTY AND OPALINE

-HEY YOU GOT TO DO YOUR PLAN IZZY

-SHE IS SO SMARTTT

-DAMN IT NOO

-‘We could just call’ I LOVE THEMMM

-THE NECKLACE

-NOT OPALINE PLAYING THE “you and I were not so different” CARD

-BUT ALSO SUNNY YA CANT REDEEM HER SORRY

-SPARKY YOU GOTTA BRING IT ALL BACK HOME

-SONGG

-DONT CRY REI AAAA

-NECKLACE TIME RAINBOW POWERR

-THEYRE RLLY PULLING OUT EVERY STOP

-ELEMENT OF HARMONY???

-HA GET YOUR CUTIE MARK WIPED

-AWWW

-CRYSTAL PONY TIMEEEE??

-AWWW THAT WAS AMAZING

LAST EP LAST EP

-40 MINS AND NEW NETFLIX PRESENTS LOGO

-THE MUSIC????

-THEYRE SO PRETTY

-ZIPP BEING WORRIED ABT HER GIRLFRIEND

-THEY DID ALL THE STOPS WITH THE VISUALS ITS SO PRETTY

-CRYSTAL TOWN CRYSTAL TOWN

-New threats maybe?

-MISTY I LOVE YOUU

-CRYSTAL PONIES

-SONG

-TRANCE???

-Auroricorns! New name for Crystal ponies?

-STARSHINE TIME

-AWW THEYRE ALL DOING CUTE EYES AT HITCH

-This is def giving me comfort special vibes!!!!

-Trip-Skating!

-STIMMING SO MUCH RN

-THEY DONT KNOW ABT EQUESTRIA

-Never allowed to leave? Ooooo

-SNOW PONIES

-GIRLFRIENDS AGREE WITH EACH OTHER

-If this keeps going this well this might be my fave ep

-WTFFF

-This is some freaky shit

-WTF ARE THISE????

-GRIFFINS??

-ANGEL BUNNY 2.0

-HER VOICEE

-So she’s like Opaline, but probably less fun? Interesting….

-Messed up tbh

-Maybe Allura will get a redemption arc?

-SUNIZZY CRUMBS

-SONG

-WOW she is stupid I love it

-DAMN THIS IS SOME OUR TOWN SHIT

-SNOWBALL FIGHTT

-YEA MISTY

-SONG

-So she might be back!

-VIOLET FROST

-AWWWW

-NEW FRIEND

-LETS GO COMET

-THEY EACH GETTING THEIR OWN FORM OF ELEMENTS OF HARMONY

-WHO IS THAT VOICE???

-BROTHER???

-THIS IS GETTING INTERESTING

-MANE 7 MAYBE??

-NEW GUY TOO

AAAAA I LOVED THAT, even tho there’s no more mym I’m sure tyt will be just as good once the episodes get longer!!

[lingy910y]

Weekly Tag Wednesday

thanks @mybrainismelted, @mmmichyyy, @deedala & @energievie for tagging me! these questions are slowly getting more personal and controversial LOL

1. If you could switch bodies with anybody for only one hour who would it be and what would you do?

Anyone. This is way too deep but I rly want to switch bodies with someone because from as young as I could remember, I'm scared of solipsism being true. I don't understand why I'm the one controlling this body - why am I the main character to me? Since I'm only aware of my own consciousness I want to make sure that other people are real people. But I guess I'll switch with one of my friends because I don't trust strangers with my body lol

2. What's your most trivial / dumbest hot take?

People complain too much about ads, they aren't that bad. I just ignore them

3. If you had to teach a college course what would it be in?

Literature analysis

4. Season 12 of shameless is suddenly happen and youve been put in charge! what plot point(s) are you gonna make happen?

No pls <3 I mean I already answered in the gallavich questionaire what I want their specific future to be, and if they have a spin off I want them to adapt @/arrowflier's Meet the Neighbors fic with @/sam-loves-seb's post-canon whumptober fics added in, but for a whole other season? I feel like the writing will actually be demolished with not enough content to base off of, so why not do specials like Christmas, Halloween, game night, maybe even weirder ones like................body swap :3

5. Who would be your godly parent? (can be any mythology).

Athena

6. What’s something you love about yourself?

My imagination?

7. Describe your day in 5 emojis:

🏐🙋‍♀️🎨🤝😫

8. What shameless character do you think you could beat in a fight?

Freddie, fuck them kids ig

edit: oop forgot to clarify it’s AO3 bookmarks. and yeah y’all are right 😔

10. Do you have a pet(s). if so how did they get their name?

No

11. Show us a meme (or picture) that captures your essence

12. Whats your typical coffee / tea / beverage order?

I don't order beverages

13. Use a song to describe the last 5 years of your life?

tagging @michellemisfit, @heymrspatel, @softmick, @juliakayyy, @jademickian, @vintagelacerosette, @lupeloto, @sleepyfacetoughguy, @tanktopgallavich, @iansw0rld & @krystallouwho :D

[geddy-leesbian]

(screenshot because I accidentally hit post while trying to copy paste something and had to delete it oops)

GOD THE LEON ONE IS SO FUCKED UP CHSBSNALFLF

first off, the timeline is different than the actual game. Luis is able to get some suppressant for Leon before any shit gets burned.

Luis gets captured again, and taken to Saddler. He had injected all the suppressants he had with him just before getting carried off, so Saddler couldn't re-infect him. But it turns out that isn't even Saddler's plan.

“That Agent Kennedy is proving to be quite a thorn in my side, much like you. I need him to live long enough for him to appreciate his gift and go home to spread it to the rest of the world, but he's starting to cause too much trouble. You like him, don't you?” “This isn't about him. Say whatever you want about me, but keep his name out of your mouth.” “But you'll want to hear this. He's quite fond of you. He doesn't want to admit it, but I've been in his head. He likes it when you tease him. He trusts you. You could send him on wild goose chases over and over, and he'd keep following you until time ran out.” “No. Never.” “It doesn't have to just be wild goose chases. Doesn't he owe you a dance? If you were to tell him that he had more time than expected, that he needed a break to relax before moving on, he would listen.” “You really think that I'm that selfish? That I'm willing to trade his life for mine? That I'm willing to trade his life for a dance?”

“Do you really think that you're not? You already chose your life over his. He doesn't have any suppressant. You used all of it on yourself, just so that you couldn't be re-infected. If you were willing to die for him, that was the time. Had you left all of it behind and accepted your own fate, he would have enough time to escape with his life and mind intact.”

Then he gets handed over to Krauser, who is pissy and a lot less concerned about Leon staying alive. So he gives him an ear piece, puts a tracker on him, chains him up again somewhere and says that he can either call Leon to come rescue him and Leon won't get hurt, or Krauser will abandon Saddler's plan and use Luis as the bait in a trap for Leon. (And ofc beyond that point he says he'll kill Leon if Luis isn't cooperating with the plan, and brags about being the one who taught Leon everything to the extent that Luis is actually worried.)

Luis just plays along, thinking that he'll be able to outsmart Krauser and somehow get Leon to the machine. Then Krauser sends him some pictures: His machine completely smashed, as well as everything being set on fire. It's 100% impossible to save Leon, and he breaks down sobbing and admits everything.

Leon's already made peace with the fact that it was a matter of when, not if, he'll die on a mission, so he's pretty chill about the whole thing and just asks Luis to kill him before his infection gets too bad 🙃

-

DON'T WALK AWAY is angsty but not that fucked up. it all started one night when I was listening to one of my many Serrennedy playlists, and forgot to loop it so after the last song spotify decides to autoplay Don't Walk Away. a song that I had never had any strong feelings about. but then I realized I'm a Fool because it is so Serrennedy and I've been sleeping on it

I know just what you're doing. You don't want to put the hurt on someone. You've been trying to convince yourself you're better off if you just turn and run.

But I'm gonna hold on tight. I've got a feeling you'll only happen once to me. And no one, not even you, is ever gonna make you wrong for me.

Don't walk away! Or are you looking for a price to pay? Is that your master plan? Don't walk away! I'll do everything to make you stay. I've got to make a stand. Don't walk away! I'm not afraid. Don't walk away!

so yeah the fic is just right after RE4 when Leon and Ashley are waiting to get picked up, and Luis is trying to slip away because he thinks he's a shitty person who doesn't deserve Leon, and Leon's like fuck that you're coming with me

[pixelbytesquad]

... okay I kinda want to talk about one of my Miraculous AUs but it's not my main one™️. It isn't one of the bakugan crossover ones either-

But hear me out... Guardian/Ladybug!Luka AU [I'll think of a better name for this later]

Context: Shit happens, Marinette's identity as Ladybug is compromised. She needs to do something quickly before Hawkmoth could target her or her loved ones. She quickly mentions what she's gotta do and the consequences before she does, so she goes to Luka, talks with him and mentions that time is short, mentions about the kwamis, the guardian duties and that once she renounces her role as a guardian, she'll lose her memories. He accepts- and welp- things are changed since then.

Marinette doesn't remember the events of the show, she has vague memories (like her liking Adrien, but can't really tell why, and it takes a while for her to reopen to him). Considering her memory loss, her friends try to help her. Lila sees this as an opportunity, and gets buddy buddy with Mari, to the point the roles kinda reverse (the class knows Lila is lying, but Marinette doesn't, though justifiable so because girl lost her memories).

Hawk Moth kinda tries to target her at first. Stops once he realizes she chose a new guardian and lost her memories. Targets her again once she starts helping the heroes and it seems Chat is getting attached to her. Stops when Adrien lashes at him (in civilian form) when he tries to deny him to see her, only to hear him shout that he loves her.

... you know I kinda realized I forgot to mention the ladybug in the room... Luka- and well-

Atm I don't have a name or design for his ladybug alter ego, but I'll try to cook something. Chat on the other hand... would basically go through the five stages of grief. He's sad that his lady can no longer be Ladybug. At one point he even tries to cataclysm the new ladybug. Eventually, he accepts this and he tries to be better so that he won't lose another bug friend.

I can imagine Luka as a new ladybug trying to be more open with Chat. Like, both know that Marinette kept secrets to protect him, so they aren't really mad about it. However, with Chat being more serious in fights, I can imagine these two being more of a duo that need one another.

Meanwhile- tbf I still need to research these characters (I most likely won't watch the show, so I'll have the power of shitty wikis and tvtropes to help me, alongside a friend maybe, and even the fandom?), but considering I hear that Luka can 'hear' the inner songs of people, I wonder how he'd choose the other holders.

Also considering that he has a sister... I wonder how long until she finds out the kwamis in the house.

... okay more bits on Marinette plot on this AU (as well as some other miscellaneous stuff).

I can at first people would bug her about being Ladybug, but poor girl doesn't remember. Alya links her the Ladyblog, and she has a kind of bitter-sweet moment, seeing how many good deeds she did as a hero, but sad she can't remember and can't be said hero anymore.

Chat still visits her on the balcony. Marinette ends up forming a celebrity crush on him.

Meanwhile, things are kinda rough with Adrien, as she kinda remembers he was friends with Chloe, but she can't shake off this feeling that she likes him. This is kind of the reason she decides to give him a chance.

Chloe may be getting a redemption in this. Thinking if she'll get another miraculous in this.

Chat may also try to convince Luka to give him a miraculous to give to Marinette.

Chat may also reveal his identity to Marinette.

Both Adrien and Luka will be in the final fight against Monarch because heck it- I think it will be funny for Adrien to learn the identity of the new ladybug this way... also learn about his father OOPS-

Joke thought about Luka trying to give Alix the snake miraculous (because he senses she may be good with time-related powers) only for her to reveal that technically she's already a perma hero aka the bunny hero. [totally not because I'm biased towards my fav]

Honestly just tempted to have the three (Marinette, Adrien and Luka) end in a relationship- mainly because I do want Mari and Adrien be endgame in this AU but ngl I also find funny the idea of Chat falling in love with the new ladybug hero too.

[chenlezip]

.⊹˖ᯓ★. ݁₊ love at first like | a mark lee smau

001 : oops.

꒰ annas note: ꒱ and it’s finally here!!!! i promise you. i will write the second chapter better >_< sorry to disappoint with such a small first chapter but i really do hope you all enjoy this series. 🤍 thank you for all the love already, i didn’t expect so many people to want tagged.. BUT I LOVE YOU ALL!! please enjoy !! also if i forgot to tag, please let me know :(

you groan, turning over onto your other side half asleep as you hear your phone on your dresser buzzing like crazy. you tried to ignore it and go back to sleep but it kept going and going so you raised an arm, patting the wood until you found your phone. you grab it and turn it on, lifting your head to see your group chat spamming your name. what the hell happened? did you finally go viral for your song making?

oh, no. it was for another reason. you press onto the notification and see a screenshot of someone named “onyourm__ark” had liked your recent post. wait— as in nct’s mark? no way. you reply back to the group chat.

you roll your eyes, no way people think you’re dating just because he accidentally liked your post. you open up the twitter app to see what people are talking about and you truly wish the ground could swallow you whole. countless tweets about you and mark together, asking if you truly were something, some hating on you for taking their ‘precious golden boy’. what the hell? all this because of a singular like? how crazy can fans be? there’s even one that says: ‘mark lee accidentally liked a random post.. it can’t be random, that girl composes for aespa and definitely knows him. something fishy is going on. especially how fast he unliked it.’

and speak of the devil, just as you delved deeper into the thread, you see an instagram notification and it’s mark messaging you. dear god, can you catch a break? it’s only been half an hour since you woke up!!

next | masterlist

tags: @polarisjisung @luvmrk @finewinesixtynine @bbyjjunie @multifandomania @jenocity23 @iluv7tn @sungbites @haluenx @222brainrot @iluvkyo @ayukas @mmjhh1998 @skibidihan @f6llsun @florihaei @kiszjuli @cloudmrk @cigsaftersuh @io6hae @neozon3nha @urlocalbeaner5 @sunghoonsgfreal @nasasungs @mbella607 @desssss-0 @prettymoles @haechsworld @mejaemin @yizhrt @fullmoon0606 @n0hyuck

[rotten-bride]

i can assure you that last paragraph wasn’t too much for me. i’ve actually watched those two films and i agree that those are great. i love jordan peele’s writing and directing, and jake gyllenhaal is def one of my favorite actors because i feel like he somehow gets the audience to find some semblance of understanding in his characters, even if they’re unlikable. i’m guessing if you’ve watched zodiac then you’ve watched nightcrawler?? (please say yes) i’ll make sure to watch those other ones and give you my thoughts when i do.

i have a movie rec of my own, but i’m not sure if you’ve seen it already. it’s called minari, and it’s about an immigrant family where the father is a farmer trying to support his family and convince his wife that buying land can be valuable and ensure generational wealth. at the same time, the mother of one of them (i forgot oops) stays with them which also causes some friction.

i decided to watch it after the song “jason and the stone” went popular on tiktok, but gosh the movie is so freaking beautiful and emotional, particularly in the last moments. i hold it so dear to my heart that i couldn’t possibly explain how much it means to me in this one ask haha.

i’m also a big fan of film scores, which makes sense bc i like to feel like i’m the mc in something when i listen to music. i use them when i write, so it sparks that creativity in me too. ryuichi sakamoto is probs my fav composer but i also love hans zimmer’s work.

here are a couple below that i love:

- emile mosseri: jacob and the stone (in ‘minari’)

- ryuichi sakamoto: monster 2 (in ‘monster’)

- ryuichi sakamoto: merry christmas mr. lawrence (in film of the same name) [but the 2016 version in his album “music for film”]

- nine inch nails: together (in ‘the bear’)

I’m afraid I haven’t seen Nightcrawler, though it’s been on my list for a very long time. I do like Dan Gilroy the director’s other work, like Velvet Buzzsaw (it doesn’t have good reviews but I like it a lot).

But what I have seen is Minari, an excellent film, all the details make it perfect. And the actors— amazing.

Film scores are also one of my favourite elements to a film. I’ll have to put the others you suggested on my list. My favourite soundtrack for a film would have to be, and will always be: Carol. Carter Burwell’s music is so damn good in most films he’s worked on (like Twilight), but Carol has a space in my heart. I bought the soundtrack back in 2019 and listen to it a lot, but only on certain days because it gets a lump in my my throat. (Also is the most important film to me as it was my first experience with lesbian media.)

[annesfaulkner]

What just happened

[changbin-froggy-jimin]

I made a new playlist for driving yesterday and oh my goodness I’ve never felt more powerful than I have listening to

1. Punch

2. Given-taken

3. A song of ice and fire

4. Boxer

5. Lullaby

6. Phobia

7. Power

Like?!?!?

[elly99]

In An Airplane

Part 2 of 3. Check here for more details.

I've been thinking about you on this aeroplane And my, my mind is in the sky When I'm dreaming about you on this aeroplane

09:28 CET

A new morning in Milan. A new number in your phone. You notice she'd already messaged you.

good morning! 😊 you have a pretty name! it suits you. nice to meet you! again ㅋㅋㅋ

good morning! and thank you!! i like your name too! nice to officially meet you hanni 🤝

oops sorry i'm so used to using ㅋㅋㅋ i forgot you probably don't know what that means 🤣 it's just like laughing in korean

yeah i figured ㅋㅋㅋ

did you sleep well?

best sleep i've had for as long as i can remember 😴 how about you?

same!! i think i have you to thank for that 🤭

and i have you to thank for last night! it still doesn't seem real

i know! i had such a nice time 💓

Normally you'd be surprised to see hearts sent so soon, but after last night you could send her a million.

me too! hihi 💓

you know what else is real tho? work today 😣 but it should be fun!!

i'm sure it will be. and you'll nail it! fighting!! you guys say that right? 😅

yeah that's right! hahaha

You already knew you were right but you found yourself wanting her affirmation.

hey i need to get ready soon 🙁 what time's your flight?

it's at 8 in the evening but my parents want to head to the airport after lunch

ok i'm going for a walk in a bit then i think i'm eating lunch at the hotel so i might see you in the lobby or something

don't worry i'll pretend i don't know you

i'm glad you got to know me last night tho 😊 i'm thankful the universe sent you my way 💫

so am i!!

i'll get going now! keeping texting me ok? even if i don't reply right away. i really like talking to you 💗

me too hanni! take care! 💗

The morning was cold and the sky was grey, but just like last night, she had a way of keeping you warm. You look at your messages, then once again at the roses on your bedside table. You couldn't stop smiling.

13:31 CET

hey we're checking out now. i went out for a walk earlier too! i bought you something and left it at reception. said it was from a fan. luckily my parents didn't notice 😅 hope you like it!! and hope you enjoyed lunch too! will text you when i get to the airport 😊

15:05 CET

checking in bags now. is it weird that i miss you?

17:10 CET

hope your work is going well!! just waiting for boarding now. btw my brother lent me a really interesting book. i'll finish it on the plane later. i'd love to talk about it with you!

heeyyyyy!! i'm soooo so sorry i didn't get back to you!! i really wanted to reply but was really busy and also trying not be suspicious hahaha

hey hanni!! it's no problem at all! don't worry about it 😊

just finished a shoot but aaaaaa i got your flowers!! thank you so much!!! 🥹 they're beautiful! i love them so much 💕

i'm glad!! yeah i realized i couldn't really take the roses you bought me last night on the plane and i didn't want them to go to waste so i just bought a whole bouquet to complement them. and you deserve them more anyway!

you're so sweet! thank you so much!! and i'd love to hear about the book you're reading! just keep ranting about it and i'll get back to you after dinner probably. gotta go for now!

alright enjoy dinner! i'll keep listening to the playlist you made me

hihi hope you like it! let me know which songs you enjoy

will do! oh and i downloaded phoning too! it's so cool you guys have something like this

oh nice!! you're a bunny now 🐰

i think i became one as soon as i met you 🐰

stop being so sweet!! i'm smiling like a crazy person in front of everyone here. ok i really gotta go. text you later!!

see yaaaaa

i miss you too btw

Who was the one smiling like a crazy person now?

21:38 CET

how's it going! hope the wifi on the plane is alright! i just got home from dinner

hey I just finished dinner too and am reading now! how was the food?

we ate at a restaurant right next to the cathedral and it was really good! it just felt kinda weird going back there and not being with you

aw do you miss me that much 🐰

i do 🤭

i miss you too hanni 💗 last night was really special to me. sorry i keep saying that but i can't help it. i hope we get to see each other again soon

it was really special to me too!! we'll meet up soon i promise 🙏 i'll find a way once i get back home in a few days

no rush!! i know you're a busy gurl and you're in the public eye so yeah i really don't wanna pressure you! hope you know that. even if we only ever get to text or call from now on i'll be cool with that. i'm just glad i met you!

ya gurl do be busy!!!

You have to stop yourself from reading too much into that one.

hihi 😋

but for real I'll do my best! meeting you was really such a gift and i wanna see you again

you're really sweet did you know that?

you're sweeter did you know that?

stahp 🙈

hehe 😋 so how's your book btw! i'm gonna have to sleep soon because i gotta get up early tomorrow so i wanna hear about it before going to bed

so the book is called einstein's dreams and it's basically just a collection of stories. the stories describe worlds where time behaves a little differently in each. it's pretty interesting! and a lot of it is based on real parts of einstein's theories. it really makes you think

that sounds really cool! i've always been interested in science! was just never really good at it 😅

well if you couldn't tell i'm a huge nerd. i'll probably study physics or something at uni in korea

really? i mean yeah i could tell haha but i didn't think you'd actually be studying something like physics. you struck me as more of an emotional and artistic person

well i am! idk about artistic but i appreciate art and music. and the beauty in the world. i think that's why i want to study physics. it's like studying the poetry of the universe

only a huge nerd could romanticize a bunch of math

well math is the language that poetry is written in!

alright nerd let me hear about the actual book now hahahah

sorry hahaha

don't be sorry!! i'm just playing around. i love the way you look at the world 😊

aw thanks 🥹 ok so there's two stories in the book that i really like. the first one describes a world where time passes more slowly the higher up in altitude you go which is technically true in the real world but the effect is a lot more pronounced in the story. so everyone moves to the mountains or builds really tall buildings to live in thinking that they'll live longer as a result. then it becomes a status thing like the people who live in the valleys and lowlands are looked down upon. but the irony is it's all just relative. sure up in the mountains time will pass more slowly but only relative to down in the valleys. they're not really gaining any more time in their lives. in fact their lives become shorter because of the thin cold air up there and they start eating less and become unhealthy and aged before their time. i mean science aside it's just interesting to think about the lengths people will go to to run away from something inevitable then they end up making it worse

wow

there's that wow again 😂 that's all you have to say? i mean i get it i kinda ranted sorry hahaha

no no!! it's really interesting i swear!! you'll have to explain the science to me some other time but what i got from that is we should just embrace what we have now. not try to outrun our lives but just live them in the moment. not lose sight of what really matters

and what's that?

love? humanity? i mean you said it became a status thing. people lost their compassion in their greed for something more. something that wasn't even real

yeah... it's kinda sad to think about. humans can be so kind but also so cruel. i wonder where it all goes wrong sometimes

yeah 😞

but hey i don't think i told you this. do you know what i thought when i first saw you on that balcony last night?

oh what?

i thought you were an angel. a very expensive looking angel 😂

noooo stopppp 🙈🙈🙈

i'm serious tho!! i just knew from your voice and your eyes that you would be the kindest person i'd ever met. and i was right. i love the way you look at the world too

you're too sweet stop it 🥹

alright alright you wanna hear the other story? it's a little lighter than this one hahaha

sure! it'll be my bedtime story

ok so in this world time is like a disc and it gets slower as you get closer and closer to the middle. again this can kinda happen in a way in the real world but that's for some other time. but basically you can walk to the center of time and when you're there time will stop. that means you'd never be able to leave but that moment would also last forever. so lovers would go there and kiss or parents would go with their children and hold them to stop them from growing older. but for people who didn't quite reach the center, just passed close to it, their time would slow down so much that when they got back to the rest of the world nothing would be the same. their friends and family would be gone and cities would be completely different. centuries would've passed essentially. so it's like a risk to get close to the center. but some people choose to do it to treasure specific moments. what would you choose?

oh that one's interesting too!! i think it's kinda similar to the first story tho. i feel like we can still treasure the important moments in our lives without having to freeze them forever and lose other things in the process. live in the moment but not freeze it forever

right? i'm glad we think the same!

me too 😊 hey thanks for sharing all this! i know it means a lot to you and it means a lot to me that you're sharing it with me. i gotta go sleep now but don't hesitate to keep writing your thoughts. i wanna hear them all! i'll reply when i wake up. update me when you're home safe ok?

i will!! thanks for being so sweet hanni! i really appreciate it. good night and sweet dreams!! 💗

good night!! hope you sleep well on the plane ❤️

But you still had so much on your mind. She was the kind of person you wanted to share your whole world with. So even if you did manage to sleep, you knew you'd dream about her. And in your dreams you'd be together, the distance between you reduced to nothing. An airplane on the ground, a hotel room in the sky.

3:47 CET

good morning!! hope i'm not waking you up with the notifs. i managed to sleep quite a bit and i'm listening to your playlist again now. and it's playing airplane thoughts! it's a really nice song and it's really fitting. so in the spirit of the song i just wanted to share some more thoughts with you. i was just thinking about how we were talking last night and the night we met, and how i just feel so comfortable? with you. like i can just be myself and open up completely. i'd usually never do that with someone i just met but you just made me feel at home. so often in my life i've been with people and shared special, beautiful moments with them. like when i would travel and see amazing cities and landscapes with my family, or stay up all night with my friends. but something was always off. i felt like i was the only one feeling that way. the feeling that this moment right here is special and i'll remember it for the rest of my life. i knew they didn't understand that feeling or treasure that moment in the same way. but somehow just a few hours with you sitting in front of a cathedral in milan i knew you understood me. you made me feel like a different person. or rather the person i always was underneath the facade i put on for people. so i hope you understand why i keep saying that our first night was so special to me and why i keep thanking you for it. it was so important to my life right at that moment. i'm just happy you're here. that's all

5:32 CET

hey good morning!! ❤️ you know the reason i love music so much and i guess why i'm a singer now is because i feel like there are too many emotions in this world and not enough words to express them. often i find myself feeling a certain way but not being able to describe it. then i listen to just the right song and i think yeah that's it. that's the feeling. i think music and art in general is just the language we need to overcome that gap. so when we shared our music that night, and knowing that you're listening to and enjoying the playlist i made for you now, i knew i felt something special with you. when i looked into your eyes i knew you felt it too. that connection. just the way you described it. so i'm happy you're here too ❤️

i don't think i've ever cried this high up above the ground before

oh hey you're awake! sorry huhu didn't mean to make you cry but tbf you made me cry too just now. and i just woke up!! i can't have swollen eyes for the show today 😅

omg i'm so sorry!! hahhaha

you should be landing soon right? have they served breakfast? lunch? idk time zones are hard

yeah they did! breakfast was soooo good! korean food is amazing. like even in planes it's great

welllll you're in business aren't you?

oops 🙈

that explains some of it 😂 but yeah korean food is so good!!

you gotta send me all your food recs!! i'll check them all out when i can

sure sure!! but i gotta get ready first. i have a quick shoot in my hotel room before the show. i might do a phoning call later when i'm done with it. it'll be quick but maybe you can join in!

sounds good! time to meet all my fellow bunnies 🐰

go get some more sleep! or not actually maybe it'll be better for your jet lag to wait until later

yeah i've slept enough. have fun today hanni!! see you later on phoning 📱

see youuuuu!! take care!

As soon as you cross the threshold at immigration and enter Korea once again, the thought crosses your mind that in a few days she'd be here, too. And the hope that you'd have more nights together enters your heart.

12:30 CET/20:30 KST

hey can i just say you looked amazing!! an angel fr

nauurrr 🦭🦭

hahaha why the seal?

sorry that's just the emoji i've been using for myself lately hahah

it's cute! it suits you somehow

thank you 🥰 you should be home right? everything went smoothly i hope?

yeah all good! tho i think jet lag's gonna hit hard

aww man i know the feel! but i'll be here to keep you company don't worry! ❤️

thank you! you're the sweetest as always

actually sorry i might have lied because i need to go to the show now. and then fly back home. but i'll do my best to message!!

no worries hanni really! 😊

no worries? more like super nervous right now!!!

aww no you can do it! you're amazing!! you'll do just fine

thanks eeeee 😖 i'll catch you laterrrr

see yaaaa

22:34 CET/6:34 KST

hey i'm on the plane now. gonna try and sleep. just wanted to let you know that i'm thinking about you! hope you're sleeping well and beating jet lag 🥊

13:28 KST

i slept for 7 hours omg 😴 will be landing soon! how are you?

heya!! sorry i've been in and out of sleep. jet lag sucks. but hey at least you're here!

i am here! 😊 when i get home you wanna call? maybe after dinner?

at this point idk when dinner's gonna be. but yeah sure i'd love to!!

yaaay

did you dream of anything?

it was more remembering than dreaming. i remembered our time in milan. how we talked about quickly passing by people and realizing that there's so much more going on in everyone's lives beyond what we can see in those few seconds of eye contact

sonder

yeah! and i thought that, knowing that fact, why aren't more people kind and thoughtful? compassionate. i mean most people are polite but there's a step above that that's rare to see. if we let it really sink in that we don't have a lot of time with people and life goes by so quickly, why shouldn't we try to be the kindest and most genuine versions of ourselves all the time? i'm not saying that that's who i am but it's who i want to become. and talking with you i feel like that's what you want too?

i think i'd always had that in the back of my mind but i'd never really articulated it to myself. but after i met you and now that you've said that, yes that's what i want. i want to at least try. thank you for showing me that part of myself ❤️

i'm glad i was able to 🥰

i used to think a lot about love and relationships. i mean i still do. and not just romantic ones. i remember thinking at some point that all relationships eventually fade or people move on and that i'd be better off focusing on myself, on my career. i thought i'd rather live knowing that i was really good at something, like you are at your job. i thought i'd rather live knowing i excelled at something people cared about. maybe i was scared of really opening up to someone and sharing my entire life with them only for them to leave and forget about me. but you helped me realize that that's ok. you said that as long as you had a true connection with someone, even briefly, that there's beauty in that. and that really stuck with me. it is all about connection. at the end of the day that's all we really need right? to love and be loved

yeah isn't everything we do in life an attempt at being loved a little more? i mean sometimes i feel this pressure as an idol to be a perfect role model for others, especially to other girls my age, and there's a certain responsibility that comes with that. i want to show them that you can achieve your dreams if you try hard enough and you don't really need anyone else. but then i realize that i'm doing this job because i love making music, spreading love in the world, and receiving it back. we do kinda need each other in the end cuz that's what being human is i think

yeah it definitely shows that you love your fans! and they love you just as much

i remember too when you asked me if i believed in a higher power. i said i thought the universe had some way of bringing the right people together at the right time. like you and me that night. but i also believe that there's magic when they form that connection. when they reach out like you did. being at the same place at the same time is one thing but attempting to get to know each other is another. if there's any magic in this world it's in trying to really connect with others and getting to know them. sharing the world and your experiences. even if it doesn't always work out, it's about the attempt. if we don't try things in life then what are we really doing right? you helped me realize that

you must really be an angel hanni idk what else to say

no i think you are!! ❤️

❤️ i'm so happy we helped each other see things we couldn't before. i mean maybe they were things we already knew in our subconscious but never properly thought about but still. you're such an inspiration! i think your job is perfect for you. the world needs someone like you

aww thanks ❤️ i'm crying again hahaha

me too lmao

i'll go wash up before people think i'm weird 😅

alright text me when you get home! looking forward to our call!

same same! see yaaaa 🥰

baiiiiiiii 💓

21:56 KST

An evening in Korea. Another night of hearing her voice. You pick up the phone.

Hey! How are ya! How was dinner?

Hi hi~ I haven't eaten yet. Appetite is nowhere to be found. I'd much rather talk to you anyway.

But you should eat something before sleeping at least! Don't want you getting hungry in the night.

Don't worry. I'll eat some ramyeon or something.

A pause. You hear her breathing for a brief moment.

It's funny hearing your voice again. Like, all this time reading your messages, I was just imagining your voice in my head, remembering it as it was when we met. But now through the phone it's not the same.

Better than nothing!

Oh, yeah! It's nothing bad. It's just funny.

Another pause. Almost awkward silence until she speaks up again.

I was thinking earlier about what you said about stars the other night. How we're all just stardust.

Yeah!

I still think that's really cool. Then it got me thinking even more that we're all just made of matter. Like atoms and molecules. Please don't laugh at me. I feel like you're about to laugh.

I'm not! I'm not!

Ok, good. But, yeah, we're all the same! Just atoms and molecules. Just like everything else in the universe. Doesn't that make you feel warm and fuzzy? Like, we're all some kind of huge family with everything that exists. And we're all 13 billion years old. Or whatever the number is.

I bet you looked up the age of the universe earlier.

I may have.

For the first time you hear her laughter through a small phone speaker. It was still just as sweet.

Hey, I miss you.

You hear nothing over the phone for a few moments before she responds with something you did not expect.

Funny, isn't it? How, in this digital age where everything's connected, you still find yourself missing people.

Yeah. You'd think you wouldn't be able to miss anyone but...

On the plane, when I closed my eyes to sleep, I could hear your voice. I think it's nice to know that you can just close your eyes and think about those you love, those special to you, and know they are real, alive, hopefully happy, in their own corner of the world, whether it's down the street or across the planet, and know that if they're closing their eyes and thinking the same, you're together in that moment.

That's a really nice thought.

But it isn't the same as having them near, knowing they're right there beside you under the same roof, under the same sky, under the same stars. It's not the same as just being able to turn to them and smile. To be able to hug them and laugh with them and hear it unfiltered in your ears. To be able to say things with your presence that words could never convey. I think we all need that closeness as humans. I think that's why we miss people. And why I miss you, too.

[gnrbitch]

Summer Break Pt.11 - Sanitarium

Warnings: lol the usual 

Guys also i kindaaaaa forgot to mention that Y/n and John agreed to just be friends oops sorry but now you know!!!

Y/Ns outfit: https://www.tumblr.com/gnrbitch/719360471671734272/yns-outfit-for-pt11?source=share

----

Pt2 of Day 12, 1986

It was currently 11:10 of the night as Y/n and John walked their way to this party John had been non stop talking about. 

To her surprise, Duff and Mandy never came back home. So Y/n left a note for her brother, telling him she was ‘sleeping over’ at Johns, which wasn’t really a lie, she was gonna crash at his place after the party anyways. 

“You keep talking about this party, what’s so special about it?“ Y/n asked John.

She looked around to where they were heading, and they were getting frighteningly close to the hell house, Y/n prayed that this party wasn’t gonna be there. 

“Its a metal mania party, a band named Metallica” John said 

“Metallica? Holy shit I know them!” Y/n exclaimed as she turned to look at him. 

John turned to look at her, surprised “You know them?”

Y/n corrected herself, “No not like i know them know them, but i know their music, they’re fucken sick” 

John hummed, “Oh right, hey look we’re here!” 

Y/n looked to the house John was motioning to, almost shitting herself as she saw that it was two houses down from the Hell House. She could only hope the guys wouldn’t be there. 

John took her by the hand as he guided her into the house, heavy music blasting through her ears, the smell of beer filling her nose. I wonder what else they have in here, she wondered. 

She quickly lost sight of John, internally cursing him out for leaving her alone. 

Y/n tried to be as sneaky as she can, scanning the room to see if she could catch a glimpse of any of the five men she was trying to avoid. Specifically Slash and Duff, no explanation needed. 

She finally felt safe enough to go wander around, maybe she could find the girl with the blue pills, then her night would go much smoother. 

She roughly made her way to the kitchen, grabbing a beer from a concerningly dirty cooler and practically chugged it. The girl repeated this motion with three more beers. 

Hearing one of her favorite songs come on, she bopped her head and mumbled to herself “Fucken love rem” 

“Me too” said a voice next to her

Caught off guard, she looked to the person standing next to her, the girl smiled and responded “They’re a great fucken band. Surprised to hear them playing here” 

The long haired man chuckled “Almost had to fight someone to play them” 

Y/n laughed and raised her eyebrows “Jesus you must love them” 

And when she said that, she realized who the fuck she was talking to, Cliff fucken Burton. Okay, she thought, keep it cool. 

“Hell yea I do” Cliff smiled, “Plus this is my party, I could play whatever I want!”

Y/n laughed once again, “You’re in the band right?” she asked 

“Well yes I am” He drunkenly said, his smile remaining on his face 

“I fucken love your band dude, Ride The Lightning is my shit” Y/n said as she cracked open a beer, offering it to him. 

“Why thank you, for the compliment and the beer” He said

“Well of course my good sir” She answered as she was now opening herself a beer. 

“You’re pretty cool girl with no name” Cliff said smiling at her

“Thank you, Cliff” She looked at him, putting a little emphasis on his name, “My name is Y/n by the way, though girl with no name sounds sick”  

Cliff laughed at her comment “Wow, look at me, already being recognized” He joked as he pretended to wipe away a tear. 

Y/n smiled and rolled her eyes, “Seems like your song is over, Cliff, what's next on the menu?” 

And just as Cliff could answer, Iron Maiden started to blast through the house, Cliff widened his eyes and laughed, “Well I guess that” 

Y/n laughed as she heard a familiar voice in the distance, looking over her shoulder, she saw her brothers gold locks heading towards the kitchen. Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. She thought. 

Looking back at Cliff, she asked “Do you wanna go sit down or something?” 

Cliff smiled “I’m so glad you said that, my fucken legs hurt” 

“Alright then, lets go” she said as she grabbed her beer and walked out of the kitchen, turning her head to see Cliff following closely behind. 

They sat down on a couch which was quite literally in the middle of the room, and Y/n hoped that with as many people as there were, she wouldn’t be spotted by her brother. 

As they sat down, she saw John and some dude talking (they were also sitting on the couch). 

John noticed her and smiled, “Lars, this is my friend Y/n” he said pointing at her, Lars turning around to look at her. 

“I’m Lars, You guys know each other? Wait are you guys dating?” Lars said with his little danish accent. He spoke very quickly, Y/n noted. 

“No not dating, just friends” Y/n said 

Lars smirked at her, “Well in that case-” 

“Don’t start pulling your moves on Y/n Lars” Cliff said as he looked back to the girl “I’m saving you, he’s a bit of a fucken chatterbox” 

“Hey- Cliff! I heard that! Why are you always trying to-” Lars started as John cut him off 

“Lars what was it that you were telling me about? Some chick you met in New York?” John said, giving Y/n a ‘Thank me later’ look as Lars put his attention back on John. 

Y/n smiled at him as she turned her attention back to Cliff, “How was opening for Ozzy?” She asked, feeling a bit drunk

“It was so fucken cool, greatest time of my life” Cliff said as he smiled, laying back on the couch. 

Y/n smiled along with him, she really couldn’t believe that she was right here, talking to Cliff on this old dirty couch, what fucken luck. 

She turned her head to look at the crowd, and right when she was going to turn back to Cliff, she had to do a double take to see if her mind was fucking with her. But it wasn’t, Slash was staring at her as he stood behind Steven (Stevens back was facing Y/n, just for a little clarity), his eyes burning as they looked back and forth to her and Cliff. 

“Shit” Y/n said aloud

“Whats wrong?” Cliff asked her, his eyes following to where Y/n was looking. 

The pair on the couch looked at eachother again 

“Boyfriend?” Cliff asked 

Y/n sighed “Nope”

“Ex boyfriend?“ 

“Nope”

“I don’t believe you” Cliff sang to her as he smiled 

Y/n smiled and rolled her eyes “You should, theres nothing going on” 

“So why is he coming over?” Cliff told her, nodding her head towards the curly headed man approaching them. 

Y/n looked ahead, seeing Slash walking over to her and Cliff. Shit the girl thought. 

Cliff smiled at her before looking at Slash, “Hey man” 

Slash nodded his head at him before looking at Y/n, “The fuck are you doing here?” He asked 

Y/n rolled her eyes “Don’t start Slash” 

Slash looked at Cliff and smirked, “Don’t waste your time on her, she not worth it” 

“Well i wasn-” Cliff said, being cut off by Y/n scoffing and walking away. 

Y/n pushed her way through the crowd, her frustration flowing through her body as she felt her throat closing up. 

Making it to the hallway, she felt someone roughly grab her arm and pull her into a room. Hearing the sound of the door close, this someone turned on the lights. 

Y/n’s face turned angry at the sight of the curly head in front of her. 

“Fuck you Slash” Y/n said to him, turning around to leave. But Slash quickly closed the door back up. 

Y/n scoffed as she looked to him “What? What the fuck do you want” she said, impatiently. 

Slash stared at her, no words coming out of his mouth. 

“You drag me in here and say fucking nothing” Y/n said, narrowing her eyes at him. 

“I fucken hate you Slash” Y/n said “Why can’t you just leave me alone? Stop fucken tormenting me” 

“Is that really how you feel?” Slash said, smirk on his face. 

“Yea, it is. I don’t know what kind of sickly obsession you have over me, but you have to leave me the fuck alone.” Y/n said, staring right into his eyes 

Slash could laugh, “I don’t really think thats what you want me to do”

Y/n could slap him, anger rushing through her body she said, “It is. Leave me alone. Everything you and I did meant nothing to me.” And Y/n meant it, this was just supposed to be some fun little thing between her and Slash, but he turned it into something fucken ugly. 

“What the fuck do you mean it meant nothing?” Now Slash was the one becoming angry. 

“Figure it out yourself dumbass” Y/n said as she finally made her way out the bathroom, walking to the living room. 

She stopped at the couch she was on earlier, seeing John she spoke up, “Hey, I’m leaving” 

“You’re leaving? Do you want me to go with you?” John asked her 

“No its cool, its not far” Y/n said as she hugged him, “I’ll catch you later alright? Call me when you get home” 

“Okay, get home safe” He said, sending her a little smile. 

Y/n returned the smile, walking out of the house she came across Cliff. 

“Leaving already?” He asked her 

“Yea, gotta get home, it was cool meeting you” She smiled at him 

Cliff drunkly smiled at her “It was cool meeting you too” He said as he bought her into a hug. 

Y/ns smile remained on her face as their embrace ended, “Bye Cliff” she said as she finally left the premises (they were outside, like on the lawn or something). 

The girls smile faded as she made her way home, tears filling her eyes at the anger she felt towards Slash. Fucken asshole.

She sniffled and wiped her eyes as she walked down the streets of Sunset Blvd, wanting to get to Duffs place already. 

Y/n felt someone following her, her head turned to look over her shoulder. She sighed and closed her eyes as she continued to walk, recognizing the silhouette behind her. 

“Y/n” The man called, Y/n gave no response as she began to walk faster. 

“Y/n i swear to god” The voice called to her again. And again, Y/n didn’t say anything. 

Y/n was close to her destination, if she could get to Duffs place fast enough, she could lock the doors. 

And Y/n almost ran to get to the door, and just before she closed it, Slash’s hand slammed against it, opening it back up. He made his way inside and closed the door as Y/n walked towards their room.

“Y/n” He said 

“I don’t wanna talk to you Slash” The girl said as she began to take her jacket off, looking for her pajamas. 

Slash sighed, “Look im sorry” 

Y/n scoffed, “Like thats gonna fix anything” 

“I know its not, but i really am sorry” Slash said, his voice becoming gental 

“Okay” Y/n said, pushing him away as she tried to make her way into her bathroom. 

“Y/n comon just hear me out, look we can make this work” He said 

“Make what work?” She asked, turning back around to look at him 

“This” he motioned between them 

“I- I don’t know. Slash” The girl sighed

“Just give it a chance, look I’ll take you out on a date tomorrow” He desperately said 

“I can’t tomorrow, i’m already hanging with Duff” She said, trying to make an excuse

“Lets go during the night” He quickly responded 

“Fine.” The girl said, turning around and walking to the bathroom, closing the door. 

“Yes!” she heard Slash say from outside the bathroom, the walls were very thin here. 

“Better be a good fucken date Slash” Y/n mumbled to herself.   

-----

LOL i feel like this chapter isnt good.

Anyways I literallyyyyy forgot Y/n was supposed to be 16 LMFAO omg 😭. But im changing her age shes now freshly 18 yasss. Gonna go back and change her age in the other chapters LOL. Hope you guys enjoyed though!!!! till next time xxgnrbitch

Tagged: @hoodiesandicedcoffee