#problem in the foster's home episode these clips are from

[rhys-ravenfeather]

Way back when, browsing DeviantArt as a teenager, I ended up discovering a DA group dedicated to defending male characters. Not a bad idea in theory...but I'm guessing the group's founder really didn't like GIR from Invader Zim, as several arguments just boiled down to 'At least [x character] isn't GIR!'

Yeah, I'll admit that GIR is kind of an overrated character, as anyone who went into a Hot Topic in the early 2000s (as in 2000-2009) can attest to, but when you use that argument for Cheese, of all characters:

LOL, imagine thinking that GIR was worse than this literal waste of imagination.

[mosylufanfic]

Whatever Happened to Tuesday

One last reaction fic! Please excuse any inaccuracies, since I’ve only watched clips and gifsets. I’m not strong enough to watch the whole episode.

Edited to correct a detail about Frost, thanks @thatkillervibe!

Whatever Happened to Tuesday

Cisco slouched into the couch, grinning as he watched Barry shred on air guitar, hair flying as he sang his latest karaoke song without having to look at the screen. 

This was nice. This whole evening had been nice. The four of them, like they had been in the beginning. 

No Wells, though.

Still, that was right, too. He'd idolized the original Wells, the one who hadn't been Wells at all.  There had always been a quiet thrum of anxiety down his spine when he was around Wells, as if this time was the time he would disappoint the older man, and see the pride in his eyes dissolve. 

Thawne had probably known that. Probably encouraged it in a dozen subtle ways.

Joe had never made him feel that way, even though he was of an age with Wells/Thawne, and Cisco's own pop, who had always looked at him with disappointment. No, with Joe it had always been steady belief and quiet support, right up to the moment earlier in the evening when he'd extended an open invitation to stay .

Not that Cisco would take him up on it. Or at least, not too much. Joe totally meant it, but he also had Cecile and Jenna in the house, his own little family.

It was good to have some time with Barry, too. Not that Iris wasn't awesome, but sometimes when she was around, it felt like Barry was only with her and the rest of them were sort of set dressing.

Which was fine, she was his wife and the love of his life. That was how these things went. But it was hard not to miss Barry sometimes.

And Caitlin was smiling and laughing too, the quiet worry that tightened her mouth and the corners of her eyes softened for a few hours. He was going to need to keep up on that sitch from Star City. Frost could take care of herself, obviously, but that wouldn’t stop Caitlin from obsessing about her sister’s safety while she was on the lam.

Did it make him a bad friend if he was kind of relieved not to have Frost's chilly presence in the room? He was beginning to warm up - ha, ha - to her. But she wasn't Caitlin. That had been the whole problem.

Don't think about it, he told himself, crunching a carrot stick from the tray on the coffee table. Just enjoy having Caitlin here with you.

Enjoy having all of them here with you.

One last time.

He glanced at her, and she gave him a big grin, her eyes scrunching up into her cheeks so he knew it was real. He grinned back. 

With one last furious air guitar chord, Barry finished his song, and they all clapped and cheered and laughed. He laughed too, zipping over to the kitchen and zipping back with a big glass of water. "Cisco," he said, glugging it, "your turn."

"Dude, I did all my songs!"

"Then pick another one!" Barry threw himself into the couch again and started eating celery sticks.

"I could sing," Caitlin said, and laughed when they all yelled "No!" She'd butchered a Taylor Swift song early in the night and had her microphone taken away, as usual.

Cisco strongly suspected that her terrible singing voice was at least fifty percent deliberate, when she was sober, at least. Frost had sing-yelled an Aerosmith song at her birthday party last year and she hadn't been half bad.

Still, faced with the threat of what Caitlin might do to another innocent song, he flipped through the options on his karaoke app. They were all familiar, well-worn like good jeans. Somehow he didn't want to sing any of them, though. He jumped back to the home menu and hit "random." 

Weird Al Yankovic? No.

Something in Korean? Um, no.

Van Morrison?

He paused, studying the seventies-tastic album cover with its bubble lettering and folky white guy. The first guitar solo spooled out in his mind, and he moved his fingers on invisible strings.

"Are you going to sing that one?" Caitlin asked, sitting down next to him.

"Maybe," he said. 

"It's really pretty."

"Yeah, and it's fun. Sha-la-la, la-la, la-la, la-la," he sang. "La-la tee-da, la-tee-da."

"Brown-Eyed Girl," Joe said from the kitchen. "Van Morrison."

Barry chomped a carrot stick. "Oh yeah, this came out when you were in high school, right?" He grinned a shit-eating grin around the vegetable, well aware that he was off by about twenty years.

"Just for that," Joe said, coming back with a cup of coffee, "I'll tell you that my pop used to sing it to my mama all the time."

"That's not so bad," Barry said, falling into his foster father's trap. 

"Mmhm," Joe said, sipping coffee. "Pretty sure that song is why I got conceived."

Barry gagged. "Oh my god. Not Grandma Esther. Please, Joe."

Joe laughed his big, rich laugh. "Son, you remember this when you want to embarrass your own kids in about ten, fifteen years.." He nodded at Cisco. "You too."

Cisco smiled weakly and tried to catch Caitlin's eye to exchange silent glances. But she was fussing with the hem of her - his - Han Shot First t-shirt, trying to fold in a little spot where the thread was coming loose. 

He looked back at the screen. Yeah, he should sing this song. His guitar was back home, leaning up against his suitcases to take to Star City with him, but he could probably talk Barry into whisking it over here . . .

Barry grabbed his phone when it lit up. "Heyyyy, Iris and the girls are on their way back," he said.

Caitlin cleared her throat. 

"I mean the other girls," Barry said. "You know what I mean."

She shook her head, smiling a little. "You should sing this for Kamilla," she said to Cisco.

For a moment he was confused. Kamilla? She didn't even like oldies . . . 

Oh right. Kamilla. His girlfriend. Who had brown eyes.

"You know what, maybe not," he said, flipping back to the home screen of the app.

"Why not? It would be cute," Barry said.

"Yeah, but if you really listen to the lyrics, they're actually kinda sad. Like, he's thinking about this girl that he used to be with and they used to have all this fun and now he's like, where did all that go? He sees her in passing and she's changed so much and all he can think about is the way things used to be . . . " He tapped the "random" button again. "Everything's different now. It's just sad."

Caitlin looked at him for a moment, with her eyes the color of honey and root beer and amber. "Good point," she said. "Maybe something else, then."

FINIS

[dragonofthedepths]

I’ve only watched the first five minutes of episode 1 of The Owl House but this is what I came up with:

(I’ve also seen a few clips on YouTube to be fair, so I’ve got some random bits of foreknowledge jumping around in my brain. Also I can’t remember Luz’s surname so I used Garcia-Shapiro as a stand in because I knew it was Spanish and I watched Phineas and Ferb when I was younger. Edit: Learned it’s Noceda, fixed it.)

Luz is abused 7.9.21 horrible parents? Foster family? Idk, but Luz was abused in the human world, and Eda cares. So much angst and hurt/comfort.

Eda gets captured 7.9.21 Eda first visit to the human realm get her captured by human traffickers. Eventually she gets rescued/out/ends up with Luz and her mom, but it’s been a few decades.

The owl house is a dystopia 7.9.21 I mean, I bet in Canon the land of witches of fine, but in Luz’s first few seconds there she saw what looked like several people get eaten so I thought 'Ooo! Cool dystopia wourldbuilding opportunity!'

Chuunibyou 7.9.21 With the occasional declarations of herself being the strongest and the allusions about being from a high standing family with many mysteries (combined with the fact that Eda is, indisputably, a trash gremlin), Luz has long accepted that her second mom- mentor has a little touch of chuunibyou herself, even though she actually is a witch. Then Eda is called and forced to fight a dual, and she proves she actually is the strongest witch in the kingdom.

Safety or Scintillation? 7.9.21 Luz manages to grad her book and book it back through the door without ever talking to Eda, and she goes to boring camp with a less than a minuet long but absolutely terrifying encounter with absolute proof magic is real. She does her best to fit herself into the mold at camp boring, try to tie herself firmly to reality with memory of  how terrifying magic was. Then there’s a fire, just a small one, and for a few moments there’s the adrenaline of her life being in danger again. And Luz discovers for certain that she’ll pick the scintillating draw of adventure over safety hands down. Now she just has to find her way back that that magical world she saw. ¿Enter demon summoning?

Princess and the pauper ourselves 8.9.21 Owl house is a more traditional YA hidden world story with things in the magic world possibly being a threat to her mundane family if they can trace where she came from, Vee solves a lot of Luz’s problems if she can keep her mother convinced she is Luz in the forthcoming future. “Hi, my name is Luz of Darkness, formerly Luz Noceda.” “Uh, hello. My name is Luz Noceda, I suppose. Formerly #5.”

Then I watched the first few (5? 4? 6? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I don’t know) episodes with my best friend and came up with all of these:

Luz takes the weirdos with her 11.9.21 Taken seriously. In episode 1 when Eda tells her to flee Luz does, and she takes those she just freed from prison with her back through the portal. On the Boiling Isles side of things, Eda and King get captured and imprisoned.

Quest powered by her imagination 11.9.21 Episode 2. You know those illusions that reflect exactly your desires and thoughts back at you in order to trap you? The wizard/quest/whole thing in episode 2 is one of those. It can only draw from one person at a time which is why King sees Luz’s reflected world.

Quest is real 11.9.21 Episode 2 AU. Taken seriously. The quest in episode 2 is real, and I re-write it to be more in-depth and whatever the adventure version of slowburn is.

Quest is supposed to be a death trap but Luz rocks it so hard as a quest she passes anyway 11.9.21 Episode 2 ficlet. Exactly what is says on the tin. Crack without a smidge of angst in sight, Luz just accidentally avoiding death-trap after death-trap without even knowing that they’re there.

Luz rescues Neveroth 11.9.21 Episode 2 AU. Just like puppeteer tried to trap Luz within himself, Neveroth is a person he did trap. Luz rescues him before bonking the puppeteer with a sword one last time, now she has a gay wingman who needs some reintroduction to society and some help getting over his trauma and possibly depression that got him trapped there in the first place.

Luz is trapped 11.9.21 Luz is actually trapped in the magic world from word go and there is no portal home, at least not one Eda and King know how to find.

King teaches Luz 11.9.21 King is Luz’s main teacher instead of Eda. Secretly old and powerful King. Demonology.

(103/100) @the-wip-project

[jordm]

Heartland 13x03 - Rearview mirror review

Previously on Heartland... Lou told Mitch she loved him & oh yeah almost forgot about that whole saga of events.

Lyndy is also talking and giving high fives and it’s real adorable. 

AND we get a “wife” aka Cassandra mention not once but twice! Once when mentioning her doing acupuncture and second when Caleb mentions getting the wife’s approval. If only we saw her (RIP Amy's friends)... but one can dream.

AND a Scott mention (so clearly Ty is still somewhat working with Scott, or at-least using his equipment) so clearly his business is still thriving. Did Ty go back and work with Scott since his own personal side business went downhill?

JACK

IT’S LITTLE JACK (played by actual little Shaun aka Shaun’s son)! 

Anyways, Jack is acting off. He’s yelling at Luke when he accidentally stumbles across his sister, June’s suitcase of things and doesn’t let Georgie help bringing in the hay-bales, even though she helped last year. Through flashbacks, we see what could possibly be the route of it; memories of June and himself from when they were teenagers (even if no one else except him or the audience realize it).

My guess is that Georgie reminds him of June, with the way she wants to help out around the farm and everything, and with Luke unearthing his memories, with Georgie reminding him of June, he doesn’t want her to do anything that brings up good - or bad memories.

Like for example, June saying her dad let her ride (knowing how her riding the horses turns out) and then his hesitantcy to let Georgie ride the cart during the hay bale even though it clearly makes the most sense

or when Georgie loses control for a second, and then gets things back on track, Jack refuses to let her take the reigns again due to what happened to June way back when, when she lost control, accidentally rode over a rock and ended up being dragged by the cart (and DIES; this is why they created the quick release thing right? Like if you get thrown off a jet ski it auto clips off). He doesn’t want Georgie to be rocked off and end up the same even if it’s a totally different situation.

But guys, this is how June dies.. DIES. Which is heartbreaking because not only was Jack not there, but she was only driving because he wasn’t there.  Jack said the reason that he pretends she didn’t exist, is because its his fault she died, but it wasn’t. I do think that this is some form of survivors’ guilt and back then, perhaps it wasn’t ‘normal’ to talk about his feelings with his family, so he never got a real chance to grieve. 

Did his family blame him since him going away caused her to be in this situation, when really it was one mis-placed rock’s fault? Or perhaps the other team members should have been close together to help her OR even better, someone should have been on the bugey with her like Jack was with Georgie (I know it was just sticks but STILL) just incase something happened? Or maybe this was more than a two person job?!?! POINT IS, it wasn’t his fault, even though he blames himself and I believe this story arc is going towards Jack finally finding closure... or some semblance of it because time doesn’t necessarily mean you’ll ever be 100% over a traumatic event.

KATIE

Guys, I’m totally on Katie’s side. It’s totally unfair that Katie has to share her room with Lyndy, while the foster kid gets the attic to himself. This is why this current arrangement to me, didn’t make much sense, and honestly, still doesn’t. Because either way they put it, let’s face it, they are one room short no matter how they put it.

Not to mention that she came home from Europe to find the entire family dynamic different, with Georgie in the loft, Tim in his trailer and Amy/Ty back in the main house. Lou may have said alright to the new arrangement but did anyone ask Katie about what she wants?! Anyone can see why she’s a little pissy at the new arrangements especially since Jack could easily move into Fairfield.

Luke: “Can you ride?”

Katie: “I’ve grown up on a Ranch, so plenty.”

I mean, it’s true; have we ever seen Katie ride? She’s may have grown up on a ranch but lately (as in the last 2 seasons) she’s been in Vancouver, Europe, a friends, grandma/grandpa... how much time has she really spend at the ranch?

Anyways, I think that Katie has been away so much that when she came back to find that Luke was here semi-permanently, the rooms have changed... and now Luke can ride better than she can - she just feels out of place. Maybe taking horse riding lessons with Georgie again will help her find her place in the family again.

RINGO (with Jade/Caleb/Amy/Ty... it’s an all hands on deck type)

So, apparently Amy hasn’t been working with horses for the past while due to the online troll aka Kirk constantly posing negative reviews, so when Jade asks her to look after her new horse Ringo, Amy is thrilled. Add to the fact that, apparently Jamie Wilcox sold Jade a horse with a broken vertebrae (and was beat while in auction?) and has a history of doing this with other horses. 

SIDE NOTE: How much time does Kirk have on his hands like damn man, get a grip. At what point will he ask himself, “Am I taking this too far?”. We still haven’t seen the Maggie confrontation, so clearly this storyline will be going on a bit more. 

Ty wisely says no to Caleb’s suggestion to lie that there was no Bute in his system to get Wilcox to admit that there actually was. But oh wait - luckily he has another horse up for sale that has been acting up and Caleb has a plan!

Amy: “Just don’t do anything stupid?”

Ty: “Me, Caleb? Never!”

They never got into mischief... never ;) and I miss their mischievous adventures, especially when they work out and give justice to the bad guys.

So Caleb’s plan is to “pretend” to be interested in buying in the new horse, while Ty secretly gets a blood sample. This works, and as long as Jamie doesn’t drug his horses anymore and gives Jade her money back, they won’t tell anyone. And since Jade and Amy (this pairing!) won the buckle, everyone wins! 

I actually genuinely enjoyed this storyline; seeing Caleb and Ty / Amy and Jade working together again was a nice change of pace, reminding me that there are other people in the universe besides the immediate family. Jade giving Amy a glowing review to counter the bad ones probably helps a ton too, especially since she can say “she helped the Ringo and me win a buckle”.

LOU AND MITCH 

Lou is baaack and is hiding her relationship with Mitch from Katie (much to Amy’s amusement), to the point where he is creeping in and out of her bedroom through the window. Like, are we in high school again? Why doesn’t she just go to his place? Doesn’t Katie love Mitch?

Anyways, Lou isn’t fooling anyone with these early nights... okay except maybe Jack because he gets his gun when he hears someone “breaking in” and it’s Mitch just crawling into Lou’s window.

This storyline was basically “kids aren’t as stupid as you think” because Katie knew all along and I still hate that Mitch is being defined by his relationship with Lou but what can ya do? But the result was that Mitch asked Lou to move in with her.  MOVE IN. Y’all how long have they been dating for? I can’t help but think that this is such a bad idea, esp given their history, even if it would solve the bedroom problem and would let Katie have her own bedroom (either at the new place or at the ranch).

SONGS IN THIS EPISODE

Dreamer - Jen Grant

[clexaeditss]

okay but since joana clearly isn’t happy with eloy and has shown interest in cris i have one theory, hear me out.

we know so little about joana but we can all agree on that she’s hiding something, and from what we’ve seen up to this point I think that it might have something to do with an addiction with either drugs or alcohol or maybe even both. Tbh it wouldn’t surprise me if joana took the drugs the first episode considering the look on her face when she saw the fight. That would also explain the sketchy guy she ran from in the latest episode, maybe that’s someone she use to buy from or someone that she owes something to. If she has an addiction it would also explain why she didn’t want to drink at the party when she said that she had a stomach ache and didn’t want to make it worse and also why she barely drank when she was out with cris. Many people think that joanas problem won’t be that she’s bipolar but that she has a relapse with the drugs and cris finds out about it. That would explain the ambulance you could hear in the trailer. I also don’t think that joana has a stable home, she’s never once suggested that they’d study at her place “ do you want to do it at your place or should we do it separately? “ as she told cris about their project. And in the text we saw between her and cris she said that things at home were a little intense but just explained that that’s how their families are. But since we’ve also seen joana wear the same clothing like all the time, except for in today’s clip where it looked like she almost was wearing something of eloys I have a theory that maybe things aren’t good at her home, maybe she’s from an abusive household or maybe she even lives with a foster family that’s not good. So instead of being there she spends most of her time with eloy, maybe even living with him a lot and borrowing his clothes. This would explain why joana doesn’t look happy with him because she’s not in love with him but she feels like she has to be with him because she doesn’t have anyone else to go to, she doesn’t know cris enough to be like “ hey can I live with you? “ so she stays with eloy. This is just my theory about joana.

[elizadebnamc]

We know so little about Joana but we can all agree on that she’s hiding something, and from what we’ve seen up to this point I think that it might have something to do with an addiction with either drugs or alcohol or maybe even both. Tbh it wouldn’t surprise me if Joana took the drugs the first episode considering the look on her face when she saw the fight. That would also explain the sketchy guy she ran from in the latest episode, maybe that’s someone she use to buy from or someone that she owes something to. If she has an addiction it would also explain why she didn’t want to drink at the party when she said that she had a stomach ache and didn’t want to make it worse and also why she barely drank when she was out with Cris. Many people think that Joanas problem won’t be that she’s bipolar but that she has a relapse with the drugs and Cris finds out about it. That would explain the ambulance you could hear in the trailer. I also don’t think that Joana has a stable home, she’s never once suggested that they’d study at her place “ do you want to do it at your place or should we do it separately? “ as she told Cris about their project. And in the text we saw between her and Cris she said that things at home were a little intense but just explained that that’s how their families are. But since we’ve also seen Joana wear the same clothing like all the time, except for in today’s clip where it looked like she almost was wearing something of Eloys I have a theory that maybe things aren’t good at her home, maybe she’s from an abusive household or maybe she even lives with a foster family that’s not good. So instead of being there she spends most of her time with Eloy, maybe even living with him a lot and borrowing his clothes. This would explain why Joana doesn’t look happy with him because she’s not in love with him but she feels like she has to be with him because she doesn’t have anyone else to go to, she doesn’t know Cris enough to be like “ hey can I live with you? “ so she stays with Eloy. This is just my theory about Joana.

[keyaanthom91]

Rosewood Get Off Dog And Cat Repellent Spray 500ml Fabulous Useful Tips

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[letscuttothefeeling]

season three episode six

This week’s Siesta Key recappé is brought to you by crayons, water-proof phone cases, and your toxic ex. Let’s cut to the feeling!

Nothing says “bold” like strutting through the home of your not-yet-boyfriend’s parents without a bra or pants on. I salute Alyssa for trying this out! I have a feeling Gary may very well be end game for her, and she’s trying to seduce him by way of Alex. Which is so baller! Anyways, you can tell Alyssa is trying desperately to remain calm when she and Alex start discussing the previous evening. Alex won’t shut up about Juliette, and even though what he’s saying is negative, it’s really sus that all of their conversations center around his ex. I mean, Alex does say he “doesn’t ever want to go back there” (meaning Juliette), but I have a feeling the producers intentionally included that clip as a little clue called foreshadowing!

Alex and Alyssa aren’t the only two dishing about their night out – let’s cut to a pool day with Kelsey, Hannah, Kelly, and Juliette. Kelly is so randommé. I miss Victoria. And since Victoria isn’t there, it’s not a very eventful hang, but we do learn one key piece of information: there is an impending break up on the Key between my least favorite couple of all time: Juliette and BORING ROBBY! Before I have too much time to get excited, we’re at a lit pregame with Brandon, G Baby, and Jared. All three of the boys are SOL in the love department. We’ve got BG, who is hopelessly trying to win Amanda’s affection, G Baby, whose girlfriend just had a mental breakdown and vowed never to return, and Jared, who is under the twisted impression that he and Kelsey are getting serious. Jared…are we watching the same show? Besides some make outs, what gives you the impression Kelsey wants to be locked down? Get off of my screen, you’re embarrassing yourself. Your narcissism physically sickens me. Someone please explain to me how subpar straight men have the unabashed confidence of Gisele.

OH no Jared, it seems that you and Kelsey are, in fact, on very different pages regarding your relaysh. See: Kelsey and Jake on some sort of paddleboarding date, which, by the way, sounds like a waking nightmare. What’s my ideal first date? Definitely not doing a physical activity that requires a strong core and wearing a bathing suit in broad daylight. But I guess when you’re a profesh model like Kelsey, it’s no problem! Speaking of Kels, it’s time to talk about her flirting style. It never fails to make me feel deeply uncomfortable. Kelsey’s cringey moments aside, Jake had a monopoly on the disturbingly awkward comments of the day. When he called Kelsey a guy’s girl…I audibly screamed. PSA: If you are a male who potentially wants to foster some sort of relationship with me, be it platonic or romantic, kindly refrain from referring to me as a guy’s girl! Like oh my god, thank you for deciding I’m “chill/cool” enough to be male! Wow! What a compliment! Jake has officially rubbed me the wrong way. Jake is nothing like werewolf Jacob Black. It’s like, even though Bella was totally comfortable posting up with the boys in Jacob’s garage, blowing off homework and eating pizza while watching him reconstruct junkyard motorcycles behind Billy and Charlie’s backs so that Bella could self-induce hallucinations of Edward brought on by her own delusions, he never called her a guy’s girl! Because feminism. Also, New Moon was an instant classiqué.

Okay, can Juliette’s bitchy boss relax? Someone get this woman Xanax, immediately. Your boutique just literally doesn’t matter. I’m cackling as this woman tells Juliette that she’s on a “probation area period.” Sure, Courtney, because you have people chomping at the bit to get this job. But Juliette’s not the only one #grinding in corporate America – Alex and Chloe sure are working hard at the Crescent Club! I mean those two are putting their BACKS into it. The Crescent Club as we know it now was built on their blood, sweat, and tears. Thank you, Gary, for instilling a tireless work ethic in these two! If you look closely, you’ll see Chloe’s master plans for the club. The “plans” are intricate doodles sketched with crayon, reminiscent of Carlos’s birth certificate in Benchwarmers. You know the one. Anyways, after they watch people put down fugly astroturf and a few umbrellas, they call it a day and immediately start doing what they do best – talking shit about Juliette. Alex reiterates that he isn’t “going backward” with Juliette, and I’d like to reiterate that he most certainly will be.

I’m going to need all of you to start blasting break up with your girlfriend, i’m bored. Did you know the song was actually written for Juliette’s inevitable breakup with Boring Robby? Ha! Anyways, thank god Boring Robby brought wine - he’s going to needette. Honestly, the actual breakup probably wasn’t as brutal for Robby as watching this episode was. It’s obvious to Robby (and everyone) that once Juliette saw Alex, she realized she wasn’t actually in love with Robby. But seeing Juliette tell her friends that she was never in love with him and felt suffocated throughout their relationship? Probably wasn’t fun to watch! And then you factor in the scene where Robby’s friends berate him (rightfully so) for throwing Amanda’s phone in the ocean, and then you factor in the scene where Robby apologizes to Amanda with a waterproof case, and then you factor in the scene where he’s portrayed as a creepy, not attractive boring person, (oh wait that’s every episode…) But anyway, just not the best look for Boring Robby! Hopefully, he had some Pinterest-worthy quotes about self-care queued up following this episode’s air.

Okay, White Buffalo Saloon – you haven’t failed me yet. Give me some good content. After cheers-ing to boots and daisy dukes, the night starts off on a promising note. But it’s quickly soured by Jared. For some reason, he pulls Jake aside and starts yelling at him about Kelsey. Like, if you have an issue with Kelsey…shouldn’t you talk to Kelsey? He makes a complete ass of himself, and once again, I find myself applauding Kelsey for her behavior. She calmly explains what has been obvious since she joined the cast in season one – she isn’t ready for a relationship. Jared, looking like an idiot thanks to the straw in his drink and his “Daddy” t-shirt, storms off. Men do not mix with straws or gold chains. You cannot change my mind on this.

After Amanda ditches Brandon on the line-dancing floor for her ex, Juliette seems to be longing for an ex as well. Alex senses that Juliette is on the verge of a breakdown, so naturally he seeks her out just to ensure she has no chance of moving on. This scene is an emotional one. Everyone has an Alex, the boyfriend your friends hate but you can’t get over, and it’s sad watching Juliette fall right into his trap again. He’s only sweet to you when he thinks you’re moving on!! He wants you as a safety net! Run the other way! It was particularly sad to see her drunkenly admit she still loved him. Hated it for her. If only there were some life-altering event involving Alex that would finally help Juliette put this chapter to rest forever. We’ll just have to wait and see…

[nellie-elizabeth]

Outlander: Of Lost Things (3x04)

Another of my absolutely favorite scenes from the books was featured in this episode, and I loved it a lot. I do have a few qualms, though...

Cons:

For the first time, I felt like the 20th century plot couldn't keep up with the 18th century story. Basically, we see Claire, Roger, and Bree continue to hunt for signs of Jamie. But eventually, Claire comes to the conclusion that she can't keep searching for a ghost. She decides it's time to go home to Boston, where she has her home and medical practice waiting for her. There wasn't really enough going on to justify an episode's worth of materials, and consequently these scenes almost felt like they were discarded bits left over from last year's finale, as we've finally caught up with the events we left off with last season.

And then there's the Brianna problem. Sophie Skelton is... not doing a great job. Her line delivery is stilted to the extent that she comes across like somebody performing in a high school play. Her dialogue is maybe a little bit hokey too, as she talks about hope and love and never giving up... but the thing is, the other actors on this show have been able to pull off lines like that, and she can't. The only thing that gives me hope for her character is that her best moments are the ones with Roger. As we move forward, the majority of her scenes will be with him, and not with Claire, so maybe their chemistry will develop into something more enjoyable to watch. For now, I'm disappointed that Bree, an excellent character from the books, is translating so poorly to the small screen.

My last complaint is with the pacing, which I think might be a constant worry this season. Voyager is a big book and a lot of stuff happens. The stuff at Helwater, which for the most part I absolutely adored, went by so fast that we missed a lot of the nuance. The Lord John stuff was excellent, but there should have been more of it. And there should have been more ambiguity in the Geneva pregnancy situation. There were a number of shortcuts, the most annoying of which was Hal's intrusion into the story. Apparently he got drunk and spilled the beans to Geneva about Jamie's true identity, which is what allowed her to blackmail him into coming to her bed. Hal comes across like a drunken idiot, which is so contrary to his character from the books. I don't imagine Hal will play much of a role in the series, as he's a relatively minor character who is probably easy to cut out for the most part. But still - John's brother is pretty awesome and I felt like we got a bit of character assassination with him in this episode.

Pros:

Despite the pacing being a problem, the stuff at Helwater was still pretty great. Geneva is a notorious figure from the books, widely reviled, as she coerces Jamie to have sex with her and then gets pregnant with his child. We can all love Willie and still hate on Geneva, right? The show made her similarly bratty and unbearable, but there was a certain level of care in the sex scene between her and Jamie. I might have liked it if that scene hadn't gone on quite as long, but... the moment where Geneva tells Jamie that she doesn't know what to do, and asks him to show her... that moment connected the scene with Jamie and Claire's first night together. The situations were quite different, but in one key way they were not: Jamie and Claire did not know each other all that well the first time they had sex, and Claire taught Jamie how it was to be done, as he'd never done it before. And now Jamie is giving the gift of a gentle first time to a young woman who is about to be married off to an old man against her will. Say what you will about Geneva, and I'll say an awful lot, but the way she was handled in the show made me sympathize with her quite a bit.

Isobel Dunsany was a delightful surprise. I don't remember exactly how she was described in the book, as it's been a while since I read it, but this portrayal of her felt right on. She's timid and a little awkward, clearly overshadowed by her abrasive and stunning sister and the memory of her deceased brother. But she's kind and she sees things more clearly than one would suppose. She knows that Geneva's child is Jamie's, and not Geneva's late husband's, and yet she keeps the secret. After Geneva's death in childbirth, Isobel strikes Jamie in fury, but later actually apologizes to him. Due to their differing statuses, Isobel could have easily been cruel to Jamie and he would have been powerless to stand up for himself. She also dotes on Willie, even knowing his true parentage, and promises Jamie to look after his son. Isobel kind of rules and I wish we could see more of her.

The real meat of this plot thread, for me, is the stuff with Lord John. (Surprise, surprise. Expect me to gobble up every morsel of this man the same way I did for Fergus last season). Lord John is such a good person and I'm just so crazy about him. I'm glad we got to see at least one chess game, although of course I would have preferred a whole series of them like in the book. But to watch these two men, with the weight of such a history between them, able to crawl their way to a friendship is just... it's so fun. It's more interesting than a lot of Jamie's friendships. Of course he loves his sister and Ian. Of course he loves Murtagh and the other members of his clan. Those are friendships built on blood and culture. With John, it's... against all odds. The best scene in the episode is when John reveals to Jamie that he knows William is his son. The two go for a walk, and Jamie asks John for a favor - will he look after Willie, and act as a father to him? If he does, Jamie would be willing to... well, let John have his way. John is slightly horrified by the offer, and Jamie says "do you not want me, then?" John replies, quite matter of fact: "I shall probably want you until the day I die," but of course he won't take Jamie up on that offer. In fact, John has his own news - he is to be married to Isobel. He cares for her, and this way he will be able to look after Willie. Jamie is grateful, and says that John shall always have his friendship, if that means anything to him. John says it means a great deal.

Okay. Just... yes. This scene is everything to me. It's sort of a useless conversation to contemplate sexual mores of this time period. Of course John being homosexual would have been seen as a horrific, criminal thing to his peers of the time period. And the fact that Jamie knows this key thing about him means that Jamie has power over John in a very dangerous way. But Jamie trusts him - even likes him - anyway. In the books, Jamie actually gives John a chaste kiss on the lips to seal the promise to look after Willie. While that is an iconic and excellent moment from the book, I really like the way they played it out here as well. Back in Ardsmuir, John's come-on to Jamie took the shape of putting his hand over Jamie's, and then stroking his finger. The clasping of hands took on an intimate tone that Jamie found unacceptable. Now, all this time later, Jamie puts out his hand for John to shake, and when John takes it, Jamie puts his other hand up over John's, in a parallel of John's action back in the prison. Such a subtle thing. Such a moment of acceptance and trust between these two very different people. Without giving too much away about future events, let's just say that these two don't always have the smoothest sailing relationship, but their abiding bond remains, and it's one of the best things in the whole series.

Before I wrap up, I should also mention Willie, Jamie's illegitimate son. I'm going to ignore the fact that the little boy playing Willie doesn't much resemble Sam Heughan, because... come on. I'm sure they'll cast a ginger to play older Willie when the time comes. This kid was adorable, and even though they didn't have much time together, this episode managed to solidify Jamie and Willie's bond quite nicely. Jamie says earlier that he's lost "two children," referring to Faith and Brianna, and if you think about it, he's also lost a foster son in Fergus. So watching him play with his child, chastise him for being spoiled, secretly baptize him as a "stinking papist," and even give him a carved wooden snake like his own brother, also named Willie, had done for him... all of this stuff was adorable and heartbreaking. Poor Jamie is deprived of the chance of raising any of his children.

The ending sequence of this episode, played under a Bob Dylan song, hit the right note exactly. You see Claire and Brianna back on a plane to Boston, Claire having given up on her hunt for Jamie through the pages of history. This is cut with clips of Jamie leaving Helwater to return to Scotland, a freedom granted him because of his actions in saving the infant Willie from Geneva's deranged widower. As he leaves, we see Lord John and Lady Isobel standing in tableau with their de facto son Willie. John stares wistfully after Jamie. Willie actually runs after him, and John and Isobel chase after him to hold him back. Jamie rides slowly away from his son, unsure if he'll ever see him again. Touching and perfect and so freakin' sad.

I'll leave it there. Based on episode titles, I'm fairly certain that the big reunion is going to be episode 6, meaning we have one more episode to catch Jamie up to the print shop, and get Claire back into the proper century. As impatient as I am, I also wonder how the rest of this season is going to go, pacing-wise. Thus far, I've been really happy with the material I've gotten, and my only big complaint has been wishing for more.

8/10

[latinalesbi]

Stefs hair is awesome I mean she looks so butch and it's so hot I love how they have styled it this half of the season

I love the style. I knew it was longer, so I feared it wouldn’t look good. But the stylist is on point, we don’t need to worry if Teri’s delayed in getting it trimmed. Stef is so hot, I just love looking at her.

Anonymous said:                                                                      Of Stef and Lena had been where they are now when the whole monte thing started do you think that kiss would have happened or if it had had happened Lena wouldn't have kept it from Stef?

No, not at all. I mean Lena liked the attention because Stef wasn’t giving it to her. One of the first things that happens when things start to change is that Stef cries on Lena’s shoulder. And she says, I just wanted to see you. I think one of the most important parts of being in a relationship is feeling needed. You have to feel like your partner will turn to you for support. It’s so important. In short, no Monte would not have been able to get that close.

Anonymous said:                                                                      I always think that Stef would top Lena. With her being more butch and that but seeing Lena top Stef in 0410 and in 0203 is hot stuff             

Yep, that’s why I don’t write it with one always on top. I think for them, it’s dynamic and depends on the circumstances.

Anonymous said:                                                                      Do you think Lena knew Stef was a cop right away?             

I imagine she knew fairly quickly. The position she was at school would sort of lend itself to that knowledge. So if she didn’t find out the first day, she found out fairly quickly.

Anonymous said:                                                                      The twins actually wouldn't have been in foster care long. We know their last Christmas was with their Mom when they were 5. Lena said they fost-adopted the twins when they were 5 and Brandon told Court that they adopted the twins when they were 6 and he was 7. Now, they've screwed with the timeline a lot but they seem to have settled on the twins being with them when they were 5. I don't think it was until the Christmas episode until we found out the twins with with Ana until they were 5 too.             

We don’t really know. We know they were with her for Christmas but do we really know they weren’t moved around before that? (And I could be wrong because I never really rewatch anything but Stef and Lena). I know they came right out of a foster home when Stef met them. I have heard nothing to believe that they left Stef and Lena’s home after they arrived.

My experience with foster care is that they don’t take them away permanently at first. So I would imagine that they had been taken away from Ana before and returned. We literally don’t know. Here’s what we do know, they weren’t being raised. They were neglected in god knows what ways before that. And we know Ana was excommunicated from her home before the twins arrived. So they were exposed to her family’s culture.

Anonymous said:                                                                      Callie hugged Stef two times this half season but not Lena :(

You can’t be surprised by this. The fandom as a whole prefers that relationship. I like it when they mix it up. I still think Callie needs Lena.

Anonymous said:                                                                      I don't know what it is but there's seems to be something so off when it comes to Sherri and Kamar. He gives off such a weird vibe to me. I saw them on OLTL so it's not Teri that's messing up their vibe for me & this is a thought completely unrelated to her.  Their relationship just feels platonic & not couply. & he gives off an extremely self-centered vibe. Not in a narcissistic way but he definitely thinks very highly of himself. Just my opinion though. What do you think?

I don’t know Kamar, so basically all I know of him comes from their social media and from press photos. When he’s posing pictures with her, he doesn’t come off as a very warm person. He seems to be more about himself and the publicity. I have only seen one clip of them from OLTL (really only to get a comparison for Sherri’s style of kissing). The social media stuff, he seems focused on the boys. However, they’ve been married a long time so they must be real close or they’re focused on their family. Hollywood makes for volatile relationships.

Anonymous said:                                                                      I'm worried that Robert getting custody of Callie will happen. Like I won't be surprised if they do it like that because they want Brandon and Callie to hook up again (yikes)          

Look, Callie and the moms are the angsty relationship of the show, will they, won’t they. Robert is an external threat being wielded again. I wish they wouldn’t. I fear a cliffhanger but I don’t have a single doubt that this show ends up with Callie as their daughter.  They have brought up Robert’s money and privilege, and I don’t see the writers letting that win. I don’t.

Anonymous said:                                                                      What Lena and Stef outfits are your favorite?

I made a whole post about this. Let me link you:

First Stef, then scroll for Lena

  Anonymous said:                                                                      Do you think Frankie's death was necessary to the plot of the show?

No, I never think death is necessary on a show. I know they didn’t want a baby on set all the time, so they did what they had to do. I still hate that Ana has a baby and Lena doesn’t. Life isn’t fucking fair.

Anonymous said:                                                                      what does ur url mean             

hell yeah adamfoster. When I started my blog, there was a hellyeahstefandlena account and I kinda copied them when the few active fans decided adamsfoster would be a good tag for the ship.

Here comes all the OT questions, I deleted a few: 

  Anonymous said:                                                                      How do we know that Brandon's ex Cortney is white though? Like the actress is mexican so her character could be a WoC, from what I know they never stated Cortney's ethnicity so we shouldn't just assume she's white.             

The actress has nothing to with character. The fosters is not shy about race and so we don’t have to guess, even about ethnicity. For instance, with one small comment we know Emma is Jewish. If they wanted us to think Cortney was Latina, we would know and same for the following question.

Anonymous said:                                                                      Mike is clearly a person of color, so why wouldnt his biological son be half of whatever Mike is?             

Whatever in the fuck? Mike is a white man. I know another fandom has had a meltdown over an Italian playing a Latina, so let me tell you, it’s not the same thing at all. Just because a man is dark doesn’t mean he’s a man of color. Anyway, just as the above, if the show wanted us to think that, they would tell us. One time, a witness who ID’ed Mike mentioned he looked Mexican or Italian. That’s where many have gotten that idea, but he’s not.

  Anonymous said:                                                                      what's with all this silly debate about B's ethnicity? he is entitled because of his upbringing, not because of his race. B has always been in a stable (barring mike's alcoholism) and loving household. cal and jude, however, have not, and were profoundly abused emotionally, physically, and sexually while in the system. cal and jude are white. all this white privilege "it's cause he's white" rhetoric makes the fandom sound racist.             

While true, both things influence Brandon. His white race has kept him from encountering the same problems as someone like AJ. There’s a difference. So he doesn’t know how nice he has it. He has had stability at home and in society.

Interesting that you bring up Callie and Jude. Jude has a more nuanced experience because he’s gay and a foster kid. He still has white privilege. Someone pointed out that in the premiere we see a cop wanting to make sure that Jesus is interviewed for assaulting Nick, yet two white boys are seen breaking and entering into a boat to smoke weed and make out and yet they get to run away laughing and giggling as if nothing happened. Do you think if Jude had been black he would have even been allowed near the boat? Do you think the cops would have been looking for him if he had gotten to the boat itself? I think the situation would have been very different.

Callie supposedly meets a version of herself, introduced to her through Stef. I think she’s played by a black girl, and it will be interesting if she sees someone who has had it worse than her and has a positive attitude. I am interested in the parallels. Callie’s problems are often her own doing and she loves throwing pity parties. And maybe she does it because she knows she has 2 moms that will fight for her and a rich white daddy who will come to her rescue.

And people can be prejudiced against white people but not racist. Racism requires institutional power which people of color do not have.

Anonymous said:                                                                      how do you feel about jude's relatiomship with noah? i think hes problematic but he makes him very happy so im condflicted

Don’t like Noah, don’t like Jude with Noah.

 Anonymous said:                                                                      i really like emma and jesus as a couple as noah playing jesus. i feel like she and jake didnt have as much onscreen chemistry

I am not in love with new Jesus. I liked it better when he was more latino (-Gabe) and played by a latino. By that token, I liked Lexi and OldJesus much better than anything I’ve seen on that front.

Anonymous said:                                                                      How do you feel about Ana and Isabella moving in with Mike?             

Train wreck. But you shippers feel safe, I am sure the writers think it’s cute. I think it’s creepy. He wanted to kill her and she framed him for murder. Yeah, people grow and all but I’d like for them to talk about that. Strike that, I don’t want them talking because I don’t want them taking up air time.

Anonymous said:                                                                      I really hope Callie tells someone about what happen with that guard. I prefer it to be one of the moms or AJ. I'm sure she wad scared but had to stay strong and calm at the moment.

Who knows? Police corruption is a theme this season. However, at this point, I will take this as a plot device for Callie to want to fight this all the way to trial. Much like that time they put in her in foster care for a night as a plot device to get her to look for her father.

[samsonddpb764-blog]

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“Pretty Little Liars” recap S7 Ep19: Farewell my lovely

Previously on Pretty Little Liars, everyone enjoyed a sex montage and Aria got caught black-hoodied by her friends. Now it’s the penultimate episode, and all the pieces are moving into place for the grand finale. Detective Tanner is on the phone, demanding that a judge wake up and sign off arrest warrants for all the Liars. She looks at their previous mugshots spread out on her desk (how many times have they been arrested by now? Do they get one of those punch cards like at Yogurtland? 5th arrest is free?). Where is my DoorDash order?! I’m starving! Meanwhile, Aria finds Archer’s body in her trunk and simultaneously gets pulled over by a cop. She locks her keys in the trunk, but the cop is determined to help her out. He rocks the trunk back and forth, and is able to unlatch it, but is distracted by a call on his radio. Aria manages to sneak the keys out and slam the trunk shut, and the cop lets her go. The Liars gather together, where Caleb tells them that Mona has stolen the game. Everyone assumes that this means she is A.D. and they make plans to take her down…everyone except for Hanna that is, who remains ride or die for her BFF. Spencer is distracted by another wine bottle message from Mary Drake, while Ezra throws a mantrum because the Liars are still icing out Aria. He tells them that they’ve all made mistakes (like spying on teenagers for a book) and they must learn to live with them. Ugh, Ezra no one cares what you think!  I mean, we’ve all seduced minors, stalked their friends, and recorded their conversations for the purposes of publishing the great American novel, am I right? No? Just me?   Is he seriously mansplaining the plot of this show to us?   Meanwhile, Aria is speeding along, having a full-on conversation with the dead body in the trunk. A few weeks of playing for the A team and Aria is coming apart at the seams. She decides that the only thing to do is go straight to the police station and confess to the murder. She walks towards the station when she is tackled by Ezra, who refuses to let her go down. He tells her she’s sacrificed enough for her friends, because he knows so much about sacrifice clearly. He also tells her that he knows how to dispose of a body, because he has a master’s degree in American Literature. LOL forever. They go back to the trunk, but of course the body is already gone. Mona comes home with take-out to find the game has been stolen from her. In its place is a note telling her to meet at the Two Crows Café for some pie. Caleb and Hanna watch her leave her apartment, but instead of confronting her, they decide to tail her. Someone broke into your home and stole your game but FREE PIE!   Spencer shows up at the Lost Woods Resort, where Mary Drake has returned with one last goodbye gift: she’s giving Ali and Spencer joint custody of the resort, which they can sell or mortgage to pay for the lawyers they will surely need once they get arrested. Mary wishes there was more she could do to help, and sneaks off into the night. We then zoom across town to Emily and Ali’s Couch of Romance and Feelings, where they talk about their impending arrest. Ali is worried about what will happen to their baby if they both go to jail, and is terrified that the baby will be passed around foster homes and asylums like some kind of Charlotte or Spencer. Emily assures her that she didn’t come this far only to see it all get taken away, and promises to protect them. They kiss as A.D. leaks some sort of gas into the house.  Does it smell like a gas leak in here? Between the stress and the pregnancy, I’m basically a human whoopee cushion at this point, babe Haleb continues to surveil Mona at the diner, and Spencer rolls up to join them. They speculate over who could be meeting with Mona, and they remember that this same café was Mona’s alibi for the night of Charlotte’s murder. Spencer also calls out Haleb for arguing like an old married couple, when in fact they got married just a few hours ago. While Spencer fills Hanna in on the Lost Woods, Caleb walks right into the diner and sits down with Mona. He then EATS HER PIE and tries to bring her to the police, but Mona refuses, telling him that someone stole the game from her. Someone is ALWAYS stealing the game from her, just like there has always been someone playing with their lives. Mona hits the ladies room before they leave, which is of course when she makes her great escape. I ONLY throw my pie for Hanna Marin and NO ONE else!   Spencer and Haleb investigate the bathroom, where they find a false wall that leads to a secret underground passage. Caleb won’t let Hanna into the passage, but has no problem with Spencer joining him and they walk down the creepy staircase together. It’s all very Nancy Drew and I’m into it. Caleb, didn’t you know that every ladies room has a secret doorway leading to lesbian Narnia?!   Remember a million years ago when we had that flash forward of the Liars in Ali’s classroom, telling her she had to run? Whelp, it looks like the writers remembered it too, because here we are: Ali is writing different versions of her name on a chalkboard (including Alison DiLaurentis-Fields aww) when the Liars rush in telling her to run. A zombified Archer reaches out through a wall to grab her, when suddenly Emily wakes up: it was all her dream! She wakes up Ali, and they see the board game has returned. The phone lights up and plays a video clip of Ali from the kissing rock as a wee little Liar saying they’re out of time. A girl has no name   Caleb and Spencer spelunk their way through the secret passageway, and discuss the tragedy of Mona Vanderwaal: always the puppet and never the strings. Caleb tells her that he got married, and tries to apologize to her, and Spencer punches him in the arm and tells him to never be sorry they boned…and never forget it. I’m pretty sure no one would forget sleeping with Spencer Hastings, but sure, whatever. Ezria and Emison meet up and Ali apologizes to Aria for icing her out. She tells her that she doesn’t want to be the bitchy Ali of days past, and everyone is friends again. Hanna makes her way to the town church, and sees someone tossing flower petals from the belfry. Hanna climbs up the tower to find Mona in cosplay as Nerdy Mona, complete with glasses and a dorky sweater set. She has completely regressed and seems to think that Hanna is Charlotte. We FLASHBACK to the night Charlotte was murdered: she and Mona are facing off in the bell tower. Mona tells Charlotte that she may have fooled Ali/the courts/the world into believing she’s rehabilitated, but Mona still thinks she’s a psychopath. She promises to put a stop to Charlotte, but Charlotte just laughs at her and mocks her, telling Mona that the Liars will never love her or accept her into the fold.  Is this it? Is Charna finally happening?  It’s VanderMarin or nothing!   Charlotte tells her that everything they’ve suffered through will seem like a picnic compared to what’s coming, and Mona sticks a screwdriver in her back and forces her to the edge of the window. She tells Charlotte to jump or she will push her out, but Charlotte just laughs and tells Mona she doesn’t have the guts. Mona relents, and Charlotte attacks her. They fight in the bell tower until Charlotte’s head smashes into an exposed beam and she crumples. We FLASH FORWARD and Mona, still in a fugue state, tries to toss Hanna from the bell tower thinking she’s Charlotte. Spencer and Caleb arrive in time to save her, and they want to bring Mona to the cops since she killed Charlotte. Hanna refuses to throw her mentally ill BFF to the wolves, and decides to bring her home. They walk downstairs and find the remaining puzzle pieces hanging from their car window. The Liars convene and decide to call Dr. Sullivan (callback!) to help Mona out of her fugue state. Hanna refuses to turn her over to the police, because she’s worried that the Mona she loves will be gone forever. They assemble the puzzle pieces which reveal a ghostly face (Archer’s?) and the phone lights up with a “Congrats!” message. The Liars watch as a Pokemon Go-style avatar strolls across the board game to Aunt Carol’s house. They realize where Archer’s body is: in the empty grave marked Charles. It’s no Mewtwo, but I guess it’ll do   Everyone drives over to the grave, shovels in tow, ready to dig up the body. Aria stops them when she realizes that A) this is clearly a trap and B) the Liars fall for it every single time. She says that the game is now over, and they no longer have to play it. They can stop digging their own damn graves already and reject feeling scared and out of control. They all agree, when a giant construction digger rolls up and Det. Tanner pops out to arrest them all. Spencer, FFS drop that shovel already! The Liars are brought into custody and preparedfor the worst…until the look through the one-way glass and see Tanner with Mary Drake. Mary confesses to murdering her sister AND Archer. She lays out a logical timeline and motive of why she worked with Archer, and her anger at his deceit. She is falling on her sword to protect her daughter, her niece, and their friends. Tanner frees the Liars, and just like that it’s all over. She still suspects the Liars of being involved in something shady, but for now she is content to take the win. Spencer looks sadly on as Mary is arrested, and Mary gives her the classic Liars symbol as a farewell. Better lock it in your pocket, taking this one to Litchfield Women’s prison   Back home, Hanna apologizes to Mona for re-introducing her to the game and causing her to relapse. Mona tells her that she just wanted to feel needed and my heart breaks. The sun rises, the church bells ring, and the board game powers down. The game is over, the Liars are free, and there’s only one mystery left: who is A.D.? In the final scene we see A.D. behind the wheel, driving off into the sunset. Tune in next week, for the two-hour series finale of this crazypants show. Who will be A.D.? Is it Jenna? Lucas? Dr. Sullivan? Tweet me your A.D. theories @ChelseaProcrast http://dlvr.it/PPWRyk

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My Thoughts on “Sing”

There’s something I couldn’t put my finger on for the longest time, almost since I first saw a trailer for the movie Sing, and now that I’ve been able to watch some non-bootlegged clips on youtube of the movie - enough to get the just of what it actually is about - I think I’ve figured it out.

See, my problem with it before was that is was very obviously trying to ride Disney’s coattails by having a similar premise as Zootopia. Except...it wasn’t Zootopia by any means. It was no secret that Disney had that movie in the works for a while, and its wiki page and IMDb page were both vague enough that it’s entirely plausible someone at Illumination saw that and went off a similar idea: animals living like people in the modern world. And it drove me crazy because, at the time of seeing the first trailer, it didn’t even look like they were trying to make it look good. The character designs were awkward and at times weird to look at. Because of the song choices a lot of the actual sound syncing seemed off (think of that clip of that sheep singing “Kiss from a Rose” - it looks like the sheep was uncomfortably being forced to sing the song by some higher power). It looked like they were trying to rely solely on the fact that the characters were singing popular songs while plodding through one of the most overused story clichés of all time: the singing competition.

And, honestly, yeah, that’s what the movie still is. But that’s not the issue I have with it, and anyone who actually is a fan of the movie feel free to comment with your own opinion, but my question is:

Why did they have to do this movie with animals?

Having seen a good chunk of the movie now through clips, I’ve yet to see a definitive reason for why the world had to be set in one where all the humans were replaced by anthropomorphic animals. Aside from the odd joke or slight plot convenience, there isn’t a viable reason. And this is one of those things where I wouldn’t care so much if it wasn’t painfully obvious that it was in response to another more successful company’s movie.

And before the arguments come flying in, unlike Sing, Zootopia had to be set in a world of animals. First off, it’s called Zootopia, automatically giving some kind of sign that it was going to be about animals. But what’s more is that the world of Zootopia was creative and unique - it wasn’t our world but something that exists on its own. And the writers and animators did a fantastic job creating a world that cleverly incorporates animals from all corners of the world and all shapes and sizes and accounts for just about every question you might have about the world. From different sized doors on the commuter trains to districts catered to the specific biomes (and even sizes) of different types of animals, the makers of Zootopia created a world where it seemed like everything belonged. And, what’s more, is that they utilized the fact that their characters were animals to highlight a very human issue. The characters didn’t feel like they were human because they acted like humans, but rather because they had the emotions and the experiences of humans.

With Sing, it’s LA. That’s it. There’s been no attempt to make the world any more different than today’s. And in this case it works against the film because it’s leaving me wondering countless questions about stupid things like “How is that mouse driving that full-sized car?” or “So how do aquatic animals get around? Do they have to pay other animals to push their little fish tanks everywhere?”. This is distracting, plain and simple.

And ok, ignoring for a minute the fact that none of the songs are original songs and have a very Glee-like vibe to them, I will say this: I like the characters. And I do like the singing. They’ve got a very talented voice cast in Sing, and each of the characters have their own unique personalities that are entertaining to watch. But this comes back to my original question: why are they animals? To me, Sing would have been a much better movie had the creators chosen to not make the characters animals. First off, as overdone as the singing competition plot line is, I can’t think of many things outside of tv shows were its been done as an animated movie. Illumination is a good animation studio. They are capable of making unique character designs. Think of how much more interesting that movie might have been with a wide variety of human characters - from all sizes and ethnicities.

Sing had nothing new about it. The animation was the same stock animation we’ve seen from non-Disney/Dreamworks studios for a while now. The music was all songs from about three or more years ago. The story has been done a million times. And even the concept of anthropomorphic animals living with cellphones had already been done. Instead of trying to ride off Disney’s success they should have instead tried to produce something at least a little different. Would it really have been that much better? No, probably not by much. But the distracting questions about how the world worked would at least be gone. The point of the singing competition story is for marginalized people to see characters and find some kind of connection with themselves to those marginalized characters. That’s how Glee got as popular as it did. But it’s a lot harder to do when your characters who people are supposed to be identifying with aren’t people at all - but instead a shy elephant, or a housewife pig, or a British Danny Zuko wannabe gorilla, or a punk rock porcupine. Imagine instead a shy teenaged black girl, a working mother running a foster home, a British Danny Zuko wannabe who isn’t an awkwardly drawn gorilla, or a punk rock teenage girl coming into her own. All of these characters are written really well, but they’d be even more relatable if you weren’t getting distracted by the way the fur has texture but not fur texture.

For a story to work unnecessary things need to be cut out from it. And in Sing’s case, that would be the fact that the characters are animals. Unless there is an absolute, completely justifiable reason - and that doesn’t include: “we can’t have human women twerking to Anaconda in a kids movie so that’s why they’re bunnies instead” then that whole concept shouldn’t have been in the movie. Sing still needs major reworking but there are a few elements that would work if more effort was put into it. But I am seriously getting sick of people touting it as an incredible and motivational movie when I’m pretty sure there were episodes of Glee that had more emotional drive. And at least those were more relatable and weren’t filled with distracting questions like “How are those porcupines wearing shirts with all those quills sticking out of their backs?” or “Why do the pigs’ noses not have nostrils, but instead little round divots? How do they smell things?”