#sassbinders

[lenaoxton]

@sassbinders that's a very good point! and he clearly didn't join until the later years of overwatch if the newest comic fits perfectly into their wonky timeline

[bekiwrites]

Checkmate

Rating: Not Rated

Archive Warning: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings

Fandom: Overwatch (Video Game)

Relationship: Jesse McCree & Reaper | Gabriel Reyes

Characters: Jesse McCree, Reaper | Gabriel Reyes

Additional Tags: Overwatch Era, Blackwatch Era, dad!Gabriel, Remembered Emotional Trauma, mentions of abuse

Summary: Jesse accidentally shows up Gabriel. One of them is unhappy about it.

Additional Notes: Based on this pic by the lovely @sassbinders/ @pmendicant!

Read on AO3

[cleaverchine]

sassbinders -> acekaladin!

[sniffanimal]

@sassbinders @ailavyn-siniyash @weepycat @silenhalle tysm Y'all (that means you all in arizonian)

[stormfather]

for the win

original

[jamiedodgerart]

these two will be the death of me

[karabrrto]

merr chrismas @sassbinders, I’m your backup Santa!

(click through for full view)

[renegadeshroom]

@sassbinders

#thanks to cfsbf chat i know exactly how this mistake was made and FUCK YOU SHROOM i never made it

its okay 2 make mistakes and also cry a lot when u make them. its okay. denial won’t help u here, friend, but i support u

[lenaoxton]

@sassbinders then they're getting they nasty asses blocked

[cleaverchine]

I saw your post about the name change, and I just stared at it wondering, "sassbinders is better than acekaladin? What does that mean? Is there a cfsbf feud I'm unaware of?" It took me a moment to figure it out

HAHA omg... if there was a feud over it it’d be dumb. you hypothetical fools, sassbinders is a brotp, they can coexist

[squirenonny]

Long Drive Fluff Request #2 for survivorofhighstorms​: Sassbinders

“Are you human?”

“Not really.”

Kaladin squints hard at the ceiling, but he lets this one pass. Shallan has some strange ideas about humanity in the wake of a thousand Soul-to-Soul conversations with inanimate objects.

“Are you an animal?”

Shallan snorts with laughter. “No. Well. Not actually.”

His brow furrows. “Inanimate object?”

“Nope.”

Kaladin hesitates, because there aren’t a whole lot of things that don’t fall into one of those three categories. “Are…you alive?”

“Kiiiiinda.” There’s a smile in Shallan’s voice, and Kaladin doesn’t dare turn his head to look at her. She’s draped over the arm of the couch, Kaladin flat on his back on the floor, a coffee table loaded with snacks between them. All he can see at the corner of his eye is her feet, kicking at the air with a self-satisfied sort of bounce.

He scowls. “Are you a fictional character?”

Shallan’s laughter is muffled by the couch. “That has nothing to do with degree of alive-ness.”

“It could,” Kaladin mutters. “I know of at least a few semi-dead fictional characters.”

For a moment, Shallan’s hand joins her feet in the air, flapping an argument she’s too lazy to make. “Fine. No, I’m not a fictional character.”

Kaladin mulls that over, swiping his hand across the tabletop until he finds the remains of their second bowl of popcorn. He pulls it off the table, sets it on his stomach, and thinks.

“Are you an existential concept?”

“What does that even mean?”

“Like….hope. Are you hope?”

A handful of M&Ms—mixed with just enough Skittles to piss Shallan off—rain down on him. Laughing, he shields his eyes.

“I’ll take that as a no?”

“No. Be serious, Kaladin.”

“I am. Wait.” He turns, narrowing his eyes at the poof of bright red hair visible over the soda cans. “You’re not me, are you?”

“Stormfather! I certainly hope not.” Shallan props herself up on her elbows, arching her eyebrow at him. “How does that even work? I already said I’m not human and not alive.”

“Not ‘really’ human and ‘kinda’ alive,” Kaladin corrects, air quotes as bitingly sarcastic as he can make a silent twitch of his fingers. “For all you know, I’m really a vampire.”

“Are you now?” Shallan tosses a pack of Red Vines at his face.

Kaladin wrinkles his nose and scrounges up the Twizzlers instead. “Heathen.” He bites off the end of one and points it at Shallan. “I am. Just because Rock’s cooking has worn down my fangs doesn’t mean I’m not a vampire.”

Sighing, Shallan buries her face in her hands. “Kal. Come on. What am I?”

“A devious little sneak.”

“No.”

“A self-congratulatory, witty cheater with a thing for wordplay and double-entendres who’s probably decided she’s Dalinar’s ear hair so none of her answers make sense.”

This time it’s a pillow that comes his way. Kaladin Lashes it to the ceiling.

“No,” Shallan says. “Thanks for the idea, but no.”

“You’re a terrible friend, Shallan.”

“No, I’m not. Also, rude.”

Kaladin heaves a melodramatic Shallan sigh and spreads his arms over his head. “Okay, well, I have no storming idea what you are, then, because apparently you’re not anything—Stormfather. I swear to the Almighty, Shallan, if your answers are all based on puns I’ll shove these Twizzlers down your throat.”

“Keep your red plastic nightmares out of my face.”

“Keep your puns out of my twenty questions.”

“You’re at thirteen, by the way. Better hurry up.”

Kaladin bites into a fistful of Twizzlers. “I thought we decided we weren’t keeping track.”

“Of course we aren’t,” Shallan says. “You don’t start getting slap-happy until at least the mid forties.”

“I’m glad you find my emotional crises entertaining.”

“Every time, Kal, every time.”

A low buzz of voices announces Pattern and Syl’s arrival. They’re arguing again, though Kaladin can’t be bothered to figure out the topic of the hour. He has to try to think like Shallan. She’s as devious as she is smug, and whatever she’s picked to be her answer is probably going to have Kaladin seeing red.

“Ooooh!” Syl darts over to the coffee table, her own argument forgotten. “Are you playing a game?”

“Twenty questions,” Shallan says.

Kaladin snorts. “Infinity questions, more like.”

Excitement practically radiates from Syl’s tiny, translucent body. “I like that one! Ooh, ooh! What have you figure out so far?”

“I’m a vampire, Shallan’s a terrible human being—sorry, not-really-human being—and this game blows.”

Syl frowns, then turns to Shallan. “What’s he figured out so far?”

“Hey!”

Shallan ignores Kaladin as thoroughly as does Syl. “I’m not really human, not actually an animal, not an inanimate object, kind of alive, and not Dalinar’s ear hair.”

“Hmmm.” Syl taps her chin, humming a nonsense tune as she considers.

Then, suddenly, she straightens.

“Wait! Are you me?”

Shallan grins.

Kaladin shoots upright, knocking the bowl of popcorn to the floor. “You’re joking.”

Cackling, Shallan grabs a pillow to fend off Kaladin’s barrage of candy, pretzels, and lollipop sticks. She’s wheezing with laughter long before he runs out of ammo, but somehow manages to find the air to speak. “One of these days, Kaladin, you’re going to remember spren exist.”

[stormfather]

commission for @sassbinders !!! this was so fun honestly

[jamiedodgerart]

more modern au \o/

[kogiopsis]

Origins mod list

For @sassbinders, and anyone else who’s curious:  mods I use for DA:O, with links and notes.

Armor mods:  note that a lot of these require using console commands to actually get the armor you want.  For that I use Make Console Commands Visible, as a lot of the armor codes are long and I want to be able to see my typos.

Practical Female Dalish Armor:  the Dalish outfit their hunters in bikini tops, which is bullshit; this armor covers the chest, belly, and legs, and its appearance is pretty lore-friendly too.  No console commands required.

No Helmet Hack:  removes the appearance of helmets (or those really silly mage hoods) from characters.  Truly a godsend.  I cannot remember what it’s like to play without this.  No console commands; it creates an interactable object in your inventory that you can use to toggle helmets on and off.

Grey Wardens of Fereldan:  Warden armor for all relevant parties!  Make sure to install both ‘Core Mod’ and ‘Main File’ or several NPCs will show up barefoot/armors will make your arms disappear.  On a new save, you’ll get the appropriate armor when you complete the Joining, but I recommend also installing Warden Armor Chest, which will give you a full set of every tier of armor available in your party camp.  It’s easier, and the gear is higher-level.  Console command “runscript givewardenarmors” also works - at least, I’m pretty sure that’s from this mod.

RL’s Witcher Emporium:  Fashion ported from the Witcher games.  I use ‘Legacy of the Witcher’ for Zevran; console command is “runscript rl_witcher_legacy”

RL’s Fashion Bazaar:  A whoooole bunch  more armor sets.  I can’t find the exact file, but there’s a variation of ‘Armor of Dark Wind’ with a skirt that I use for Morrigan (see here).  It might be packaged with the ‘replacement armor textures’ file?  Either way:  console code is ‘runscript rls_dark_wind’.

Kirkwall Exports:  Several armors from DA2.  I’m pretty sure, though it isn’t pictured, that this is where I got Wynne’s fluffy-trimmed robe from; if so, it’s “runscript robe1″!

Loincloth Fashion:  The huge DA2 port, armor and weapons.  I like the Black Fox Armor for Leliana (runscript get_rip_1b) and used this set for my human noble archer, before he got his Warden gear.  LCF is notable for having some casual-ish outfits, too.

Morrigan Sacred Ashes Trailer Robes:  I installed this after I got rid of her starting gear, so I’ve never seen it in action, but still.  Replaces Morrigan’s kinda-fanservicey outfit with something more pragmatic, but still aesthetically appropriate.

Apostate Clothing:  Some casual outfits from DA2.  You get all three with “runscript zz_givemageclothing”.  Sometimes your Warden needs to wear a snuggly sweater, you know?

Neutral Female Armor:  Gets rid of boobplate in basic game gear.

Gameplay Mods:

Personal Annoyance Remover:  Gets rid of the animations applied by some effects, which will follow you into cutscenes and muck up your screenshots.  I haven’t played with this extensively, but... thank the Maker it exists.

MerAnne’s Camp Storage:  In both DA2 and DAI, you will have access to a storage chest, where you can drop stuff you aren’t ready to sell yet and get more inventory space back.  DAO doesn’t have this, so someone modded it in, and it is really, really useful - especially because one of the backpack additions is at Ostagar, and if you miss it, boom!  it’s gone forever.

Skip Fight:  Adds an item to your inventory that you can use to kill all hostiles around you.  Very useful if you’re replaying for story and don’t care about combat (or if you’re playing for the first time for story and don’t care about combat).  Sometimes there’s a little delay before it takes effect - just mash the button again.  It’ll work.  It... also works on the boss fight, which I found out kind of by accident.

Skip the Fade:  NOT RECOMMENDED UNTIL SECOND PLAYTHROUGH. Everyone’s gotta suffer through the Fade once.  It’s a long, tedious dungeon though, and most people don’t want to do it twice  hence this mod.  Works like a charm, saved me something like 3+ hours.

Extra Animations/Romance Mods:

Leliana Romance Scenes:  My actual favorite DAO mod, because I love Leliana and now my Warden can kiss or hug her anywhere.  Also adds romantic walk, drinking wine together, and a couple of different optional ‘intimate’ sequences.  If you romance Leliana, this is a must.

Sleep Until Dawn:  Snuggle up with your love interest, your dog, or by yourself, and then wander around camp in pretty dawn lighting.

Zevran Romance Scenes:  Similar to LRS, but for Zevran!  I’ve never used this, but it’s made by the same person, so I’m guessing it works pretty well.

ZDF Dialog Fix:  Apparently overhauls a looot of glitchy dialog.  I have this downloaded, but have never installed it because I need to double-check that it won’t interfere with LRS at the end of the game.  It’s spoken of highly, though.

Equal Love:  Removes gender restrictions from romances (Alistair and Morrigan) and casual flirtations with NPCs.  Note that if you do romance Alistair with a male Warden or Morrigan with a female Warden, you will not be able to carry that information to Inquisition.  Inquisition worldstate import uses Dragon Age Keep, which will reject either your Warden’s gender or your love interest if you try to put this information in.  Also:  both of these love interests will misgender the Warden in talking to them or about them in party banter.

Alistair romance mods:  There are so many.  That link just goes to DahliaLynn’s profile, because she’s uploaded four of them.  There are more on the Nexus, though.  Lots.

Morrigan Restoration Patch:  Fixes scenes and dialog that’s supposed to be triggered with Morrigan, but isn’t.  This is another one I haven’t used because I’m worried about potential conflicts with LRS, but thought was worth mentioning.

Character Creation Mods:  Not relevant once you’re playing, but for potential replays... there are so many.  Unlike Inquisition, you don’t have to worry about mods that add things conflicting with each other; you can have as many hairstyles as you want!  However, you do need CharGenMorph Compiler to merge them together without conflicts.

Hair:  Anto Hairstyles, Look Hair: Frippery Edition, Hairstyle Day, More Hairstyles, Tucked Hair, Look Hair  (from what I can tell the mod creator is re-releasing updated/remastered hairstyles from the original Look Hair bundle one at a time, along with some new ones.)

Special  mention:  Black Hair Is Black, which can affect in-progress games and is so worth it.

Face:  Bidelles Cosmetics, Eyebrow Presets, Bandit Emporium

All:  Pineappletree’s Vibrant Colors, which has been fairly criticized for adding a looooot of new Caucasian skintones but not many for any other potential ethnicity.  Nonetheless, it’s required for a lot of other mods, so it’s a good one to have around.

Dragonagemods also has an Origins mod rec list, if that’s not overwhelming enough!   

Everything on the Nexus should have installation instructions, but if you have questions I’m happy to try and answer, and the people who run Dragonagemods are great too.

[esseastri]

ok i just wanted you to know that i read thud! and now i can't see where's my chull the same way again

YAAAASSSSSS I AM SO PLEASED

ngl, I haven’t actually read Thud! yet...it’s on my list (all of Pratchett is on my list), and I’ve read some of the other Watch books, but I haven’t made it to Thud! yet; but I’ve read the pertinent bits, and I’ve read Where’s My Cow? several times, and I’m just so, so, so pleased that this bit of awesome exists and is still making people smile.

But, yeah, Vimes is my favorite Pratchett character who isn’t Susan, and Dalinar is my favorite Stormlight charater who isn’t Kaladin, and the opportunity was just too good to pass up.

((For those of you who have no clue what we’re talking about, let me circulate the Where’s My Chull? link one more time...))

[squirenonny]

Okay sassbinders I have to say it.

Thanks to your new URL I keep seeing your reblogs and thinking “Sassbinders shared blog.”

Shallan seeing this and tagging it #kaladin gloomblessed #tbh

Shallan tagging this for Kaladin. Him reblogging it with the caption “Cheerful goblin”

Kaladin reblogging this with the tags #Shallan #I dare you to try this the next time Jasnah gets philosophical