#sorry I keep editing this to make it easier to read/understand

[bluejutdae]

• best friend Stray Kids saving you (or being saved by you) from a bad date | Felix x you

Chan | Minho | Changbin | Hyunjin | Jisung | Seungmin | Jeongin

genre: romance, best friend to lovers

warnings: none, except that i am not satisfied at all with this but I’ve read it so many times I’m starting to hate it. I might edit heavily later

The moment you park outside the restaurant Lixie is in, you press the call button. Faking an emergency is not too hard, you talk about a friend getting injured and at the hospital, exaggerating your tone and almost making Felix laugh.

He’s out in less than five minutes. Under his bright smile there’s something you can’t decipher. He gets in your car and just his presence makes you happy. Everyone loves Felix, and you’re not immune to his charm either. He’s always kind, generous, sweet and funny. You’re really lucky to have him in your life.

“Ice cream?”

“Yes, please.” It’s so funny to hear his deep voice in such a childish tone.

You don’t press for answers about his date during the drive to your favorite ice cream place, you put on some music and sing loudly with him. Save for that indecipherable look in his eyes, he seems pretty normal.

You take your ice creams and decide to take a walk on the riverside. The wind is pretty chill, but neither of you mind too much. It’s him who brings up the date he was on.

“The date… it was like a blind date. But I didn’t know it was a date until it was too late.”

“Uh- what?” It doesn’t make sense: how did he manage to go on a date without knowing?

“Hannie.” Yeah, maybe it makes sense. Jisung means well, but most of the time the execution is, at best, messy.

“How did he get you?”

“He begged me to go on a double date on the premise it was just because this girl he wanted to go out with was wary of going out alone with him so she’d bring a friend with, but we were supposed to be just wingmen. Or so he told me.”

He licks his ice cream and shakes his head.

“About 10 minutes before we were supposed to meet he called and told me it was a lie and it was a blind date…”

You’re not sure as to what to say. It is very on brand for Jisung, but you can also understand how frustrating it can be for Felix. He’s a sweetheart, he must have felt guilty for having unwillingly misled the girl.

“I couldn’t just leave and stand her up. She knew nothing about the lie, so it wasn't her fault.”

“Was she nice, at least?”

He nods, but he seems almost distracted. “She was nice. Pretty and funny, to be honest.”

“Why didn’t you stay, then?”

He slows down to a stop, and the moment you notice you turn around to look at him, a question on your face. He cleans his mouth with the small napkin and exhales with a small grimace.

“Lix?”

“Because I like you. And I’m not interested in other girls.”

He likes you. Felix likes you. And not in a friendly way. In a like like way. You weren’t expecting that.

“I-“ you start, but you don’t know how to continue that sentence. What do you say to your best friend who just said he likes you? Do you even like him? You’ve always been pretty good at keeping your feelings in check, so after knowing him, when it was clear you were headed towards just being friends, that’s what you set your mind -and your heart- to. He’s your friend, and you didn’t even ever consider more.

“I’m sorry. I’ve kept it from you for a while but I couldn’t anymore. That’s why Jisung insisted on this date. He was trying to distract me.” He turns slightly to watch at the river flowing fast but quietly. “Things don't have to change. If you don’t feel the same it’s okay, but I’d like to stay friends if you’re okay with that. I don’t wanna lose you.”

The idea of Felix losing you is ridiculous to you, nothing is ever gonna make you distance yourself from him. You try to tell him so by hugging him. “Lixie, we’ll always be friends, no matter what.”

You speak into his jacket, and maybe it’s easier this way.

“I thought we were only meant to be friends, so I didn’t even consider looking at you in a different way.” You can feel him tense under your hug. “Wait, wait, listen to me please.” Still hugging him you try to look at him, a smile on your lips. He’s your best friend, he’s the best person you’ve ever met. Being liked by him is an honor, and if you think about it, trying to be something more it’s not something that you hate.

“You’re my best friend, Lix. You know I love you, and I think you’re perfect. I never let myself think about you like that, but I know that if I give it a chance, it’d be so easy to fall in love with you romantically.”

“You don’t have to make yourself like me.”

“Don’t be silly. I’d be lucky to love you. Give me a chance?”

He’s smiling now, and he’s so so pretty like this. He’s always pretty, you tell him constantly, but when he smiles it’s his best look.

“Are you sure?”

“I’m sure Lixie. Let me take you out on a date? I promise to spoil you…”

“Shouldn’t I be the one asking you out?”

“It’s okay. You can ask next time.” You kiss him on his cheek and hold his hand, making him resume your stroll.

He really is easy to love, and not even a month later you ask yourself how you ever managed not to be head over heels in love with your best friend boyfriend.

[moonystoes]

Who? - Elisa De Almeida x singer!reader

summary: when the public thinks y/n is dating a football player... a male player. Inspired by this

A/n: this shit made me wanna kms. i really thought social media au would be easier since it's not writing. but holy shit editing this was ass. also the fact that it took me around 10 hours yesterday only?? and 138 pictures. but lowkey... making fake beef and conversations was kinda fun lol.

warning: nothing, but this is the first time i made a social media au so it may be bad...and the quality of these screenshots are shit. also...I worked really hard editing the time of those screenshots (except the second one... i forgot) they will help you understand the timeline. I recommend reading this in white mode so the tweets can look smoother.

face claim :@itsouidad on instagram

y/nl/n

liked by ayanakamura_officiel, brahim, jackie_groenen_14, and 39,968 others

y/nl/n smiles and preparations, 2 days until I meet you guys 🫶(also happy new years lollll 😭😭)

احبكم كثيرررر 🩷🇶🇦

view all 7,983 comments

user1 IS THAT SOUQ WAQIF???? GUYS KILL ME SHE WAS RIGHT AROUND ME AND MY BLIND ASS DIDNT SEEEE 😭😭😭💔💔

user2 wait they allow women to not wear the scarf there?

↳ user3 @User2 girl what?? yes tf, get out of the propaganda ffs

ayanakamura_officiel ohh la laaa

↳ y/nl/n @Ayanakamura_officiel 💍 yes or no?

↳ user3 @y/nl/n lmfaoooo y/n keeps forgetting shes famous now

y/nbiggestfan awhhh how is it babee?

↳ y/nl/n @y/nbiggestfan everyone is so sweet and generous 🤧🥹🥹, i can't wait to meet yall

y/nupdates have fun sweetie!! enjoy it

↳ y/nl/n @y/nupdates thank you Emi 🫶

jackie_groenen_14

liked by elisadealmeida5, psg_feminines, and 13,622 others

tagged: elisadealmeida5, sakinakarchaoui, grace_geyoro, psg_feminines, qatarairways

jackie_groenen_14 always learning with the girls, it was nice to have some special days with my 2nd fam ❤️💙

view all 58 comments

y/nl/n what were you thinking in the 5th slide lolll

↳ jackie_groenen_14 @y/nl/n i thought you said it was cute :(((

↳username1 @jackie_groenen_14 im so confused how do they know each other

elisadealmeida5

liked by y/nl/n, jackie_groenen_14, grace_geyoro, and 74,567 others

elisadealmeida5 Great time together in doha 🇶🇦

Thanks for the amazing experience ✨️

@psg_feminines

@Visitqatar

@qatarcreates

@Qatarairways

#parissaintgermain #psg #paris

View all 321 comments

_clarehunt 🥰🥰

jackie_groenen_14 baby ❤️

user54 تهبلللل اخخخخ

user42 lindaaaa😩

user11 who was she giggling with on the 5th pic ugh 😩😩

y/nl/n

Liked by elisadealmeida5, kehlani, brahim, and 36,641 others

y/nl/n thank you so much Qatar for this experience, too many pretty places my phone storage is gonna explode ☹️

Thank you @dohamusicfestival for this unforgettable moment, and to everyone involved (that old lady that was making Nutella bread in souq waqif, I will never forget you 👆)

View all 2521 comments

user5 you're always welcome back!💞💞

user3 maybe that girl on Twitter wasn't so blind... I swear it's the same place

↳ user1 @user3 babe that's The Pearl it's literally like number 1 on tourist attraction place

↳ user3 @user1 so? They could go together

↳ user1 @user3 I still don't understand the fascination of them going together, like she can have friends. I know she's antisocial and makes jokes about it but I promise she's not a baby 🙏🙏

Cutiedealmeida uploaded a thread

"can I get a kiss?" - fan of Elisa's

Elisa: "sorry, I'm not single sorry" 💔

-

-

oh my god elisa speaks in English again! Does this confirm that our favorite football player is taken...or is she just saying that as the girl looks much younger? Who knows! I guess we have to wait till Eli confirms her relationship...video credits: @emiliaaa.zl 🤞❤️ #elisadealmeida #footballnews #psg #psgfeminines

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↳ user1 FUCK MY LIFE

↳ user2 she literally just confirmed it by saying she's not single 💀💀 do you want her to post a sloppy make out picture or what

↳user3 let me not just say anything...

↳user4 @user3 do you know who is the gf?

↳user3 @user4 nope I was just jealous 😁

fanofyn @ynupdates do you think it could be her?

↳ ynupdates @fanofyn y/n never said she's not single. And even if she is taken, there is barely any proof of it being Elisa 🤞

elisadealmeida5 uploaded a story

y/nl/n

Liked by elisadealmeida5, kehlani, brahim, and 79,751 others

Y/n ☀️❄️

View all 9562 comments

User1 she couldn't think of a caption so she used emojis lol

↳ y/nl/n @User1 stop exposing me 😔

Besfriend can't believe you ditched me for this 💔💔

↳ y/nl/n @Bestfriend stopppp I asked you if you wanted to come 😭😭

Jackie_groenen_14 the sunglasses and the smile 😍😍

↳y/nl/n @jackie_groenen_14 shut up I'm blushing 🤚

User2 SHUT UP SHES WITH THAT PLAYER

↳user3 @User2 that place is very popular lol every rich person is there right now

↳user2 @User3 man I can't even be fucking delusional anymore without yall

↳user4 @User2 I believe you, they were posing the same way too ✊️

↳user2 @User4 WHAT THE HELL I DIDNT EVEN NOTICE THAT

Y/nl/n uploaded a story

elisadealmeida5 uploaded a story

Y/nl/n

Liked by elisadealmeida5, brahim, kehlani, and 156,164 others

Y/nl/n good night and good win 🙏 Hala madrid 🤍

View all 12736 comments

User1 wait she's actually with brahim????

↳user2 @User1 I'd cry

User3 slut, only cares about players for money

↳user4 @User3 get a fucking life weirdo

User5 nooo the men found out about her :(( she will literally get hate on every post now

Bestfriend idgaf it's visca barca

↳ y/nl/n @Bestfriend babe... this isn't you 😔😔

user6 she's wearing a Spain shirt 👀

↳ user7 @User6 isn't brahim Moroccan?

↳user6 @User7 he's half Spanish, and before he got into the Moroccan team he wanted to play for the Spanish one but he wasn't good enough for them ig😬😬

User8 BABBYYYYY LOOK AT MY GIRL LIKE WOW

User9 awh she's so happy for her boyfriend ;((

User10 the last slide is brahim?

User11 awhh it's so cute how she's teaching him how to eat with his hand, but the food looks too hot tho 😭😭

Y/nl/n uploaded a story

Y/nupdates_page

Liked by user1, y/nsister, and 64,652 others

Y/nupdates_page GUYS KILL MEE Y/N JUST WENT LIVE FOR THE FIRST TIME IN A YEAR!...but something happened in the end as you can see from this screen-recording.

Is Y/n dating Elisa? Or was it Brahim? The audio wasn't clear, and the camera wasn't showing the door properly either! But from the small corner... the person has the same features as both brahim and Elisa. Short brown hair and fair skin... it could be either. But it's 99% Brahim since y/n never made a statement that she likes women, and she did make a lot of... interesting tweets back in the day about brahim ifykyk 🙈🙈

#y/n #music #elisadealmeida

View all 11,614 comments

user1 LMFAOOOO HER FACE

user2 idfc I'll stay delusional and pray it's Elisa

user3 wait what happened after this???

↳Y/nupdates_page @User3 she froze for 5 seconds, laughed, and then just ended it 😭😭 not even a fucking goodbye, she HATES us 😔💔💔

user4 noooo she's not single anymore💔 no more heartbroken depressing music

user5 wait who the fuck is Elisa and why does it feel like there is some inside joke that yall are hiding from me

↳Y/nupdates_page dw bae i got you, I made a post about the whole rumor a while ago 🫡

user6 HER SISTER LIKED IT

↳Y/nupdates_page @User6 she's probably sending it to the gc to laugh at her lmfao 💀💀

User7 #music ma'am are you that desperate for likes

↳Y/nupdates_page @User7 yes I'm an attention whore and the tag clearly worked.

y/nl/n

Liked by elisadealmeida5, jackie_groenen_14, kehlani, and 196,725 others

Tagged: elisadealmeida5

y/nl/n I'm so happy for my girlfriend ;((

eli, I'm so proud of you and I love you so much 🤎🤎

View all 60,624 comments

elisadealmeida5 babbyyyy❤️❤️🥺🥺

↳y/nl/n @elisadealmeida5 ❤️🤎

user1 WHICH ONE OF YALL BITCHES CALLED ME DELUSIONAL

user2 it's actually insane how we knew about this from a random tweet damn

user3 brahim didn't like this post lolll

user4 that's a girl?

user5 damn she's hot as hell

user6 I get depressed thinking she's not single but I start crying in joy when I realize it's a woman

user7 awhh she used a brown heart emoji 🤎🥺🥺🥺

↳user8 @User7 what the fuck is that supposed to mean 💀💀

↳user7 @User8 y/n has a whole album called 'Brown Hearts' lol

user9 Elisa is not single :(((((

user10 wait are they together?

↳user11 @User10 well i tell you what Sherlock Holmes you are unbelievable

↳y/nsister @User11 LMFAOAOAO

-----

i want to thank @thinkingaboutjaedyn for showing ouidad... like its insane how perfect she is for this

fun facts:

-the pictures were somehow easy to find, i was actually shocked on how i was able to find pictures from ouidad for this fic, the only time i struggled was for the 'paparazzi' pics at the end.

-the two pictures on y/n's post of her in qatar were from my sister's instagram page

if there is a mistake ignore it because im gonna kms if i have to edit this again

[pink-onyx-au]

Community Translation Campaign

All who help will be credited in the final results.

So many people have offered to help that I just had to come up with an idea to make it easier on everyone, even to offer ways to work together. So, here is the plan!

The English for the episode is posted here, in order, for you to read. State which language you’re using, and donate as many words as you like to the project! When a language has a complete translation and is double-checked, I can take care of the editing. Thank you to everyone! 🧡💕❤️

Words to clarify intention or clarity in the statement that were not said within the dialog of the comic will be presented (like this) to better help translations. Any questions, just post and I will get back to you as best as I can!

Episode 1 - Antipathy (English Script)

If it matters in your language, Steven is masculine-form grammar. Jasper is feminine-form grammar. The Diamonds (not Steven) are feminine-form grammar.

Steven: No. I’m sorry. Where is- Jasper, I (‘m sorry) I can’t find (her) It has to be here. It is here somewhere. I have been holding (myself) back!

I have to do something about this.

Steven: Jasper. Please. I want to talk

Jasper. What is it, my diamond?

Steven: Please! I just want to talk. As equals. Please…

Jasper: In order to do that, you’ll have to get on the dirt (or ground). Now that you’re down here with the dust, what do you want to talk about?

Steven: I can’t sleep. So much has happened since- my meltdown. Everyone is hovering over me every hour of the day, but, I need to apologize for how I acted that day. You were just trying to help me, and I did the worst possible thing (to you).

Jasper: I told you before, don’t apologize!

Steven: Why?

Jasper: I wanted to see the full extent of your power, and I got my answer. You let yourself go. That’s what I wanted.

Steven; But jasper, I- (shattered you)

Jasper: Shattered me? Why does that bother you?

Steven: Why doesn’t it bother you

Jasper: Soldiers are shattered (killed) all the time, Steven. It’s why we are made. To win, and replace. That’s why the one thing I don’t understand - is why you brought me back (revived me) after you got what you wanted.

Steven: "What I wanted!?" I- I didn’t want to shatter you! It was a mistake!

Jasper: The moment a gem is permitted to act to their fullest is when they show what they really want. It is absolute. From pebble to diamond

You may say you didn’t want to shatter me, but based on the look in your eyes, something did.

Steven: I-I don’t know what that was! I mean, I do now but I-

Jasper: You don’t understand it, so you came here. Just like last time. Why do you keep coming back here to find answers? That the only thing I’m good for to you? Told me yourself you want to high to do with me otherwise.

Steven: No! No. It’s not that. You’re… just the furthest thing from what I know about my world. And you act like that’s normal for you. So when nothing in my world makes sense, it just makes sense to come here.

Jasper: Well, at least we agree on one thing.

Steven: What do you mean?

Jasper: My world doesn’t make any sense to me anymore, either. Nothing my diamond has done makes sense to me anymore. Start a colony just to preserve it? Start a war just to lose it? Die to become(be reborn) as you? I was made to win a gem-war for a diamond with power so destructive that the other diamonds hesitated to give her a colony in the first place. A diamond with so much strength that a word from her could shatter. The closest you ever came to making sense to me is the day you finally cut loose. Then, like everything else, your colony, your court, your status, your form, you tossed me aside and moved onto the next thing. Told me to ‘find something better to do with my life’ when my whole life has been fighting for you, my diamond.

Steven: Jasper I-I’m, I’m sorry

Jasper: Stars ("god";swear form), shut up with that! You did what you wanted every second you’ve been out of the dirt!even this human form! Even being here right now! Until you get that, this conversation is going to be a waste of both of our time!

Steven: I-I just.. I’ve done such a horrible thing, and I can’t sleep because it keeps replaying, and each time I see it, it scares me to death because I hate how good it feels.

Jasper: Come (with me). If you’re going to start this, then we’re doing it out here. I don’t want me den destroyed. Listen carefully, Steven. Is this what you want?

Steven: No.

Jasper: Then focus on what you want.

Steven: I don’t want to hurt you

Jasper: Then calm down!

Steven: Sorry. How are you okay with what I did to you?

Jasper: Honestly, Steven, I don’t know why you aren’t (okay with it). I don’t throw a punch without intent to hit something. Let alone regret it after the fact. You’re just going to have to live with the idea that we will not understand one another.

Steven: I want to though! That- that is what I want.

Jasper: And how do you intend to get that? by coming here and begging for answers I don’t have?

Steven: Maybe there is a way, but, I-I have a way. That we can both get answers. If you want answers. Also.

Jasper: Go on.

Steven: Maybe if we feel what it’s like to be each other

Jasper: What are you implying?

Steven; Ah, I’m implying! That we could fuse, if you wanted to do that. Too. Maybe?

Jasper: That was the most pathetic request to fuse I’ve ever heard. I am not fusing with someone who whimpers like some under-cooked pebble. So, if that’s what you really want, show me you have the guts to take it!

Steven: Fine, jasper. Then, As your Diamond: Fuse with me

Jasper: Much better!

Jasper: Should have known you were full of dirt ("shit";swear)

Steven: I don’t know what happened. I’m usually good at (doing) this.

Jasper: You ran (away)!

Steven: No I, I think something poofed us.

Jasper: Well, it wasn’t me! So, whatever that was and to come from you!

Steven: It’s going to be ok. We do this together next time.

Steven: I have an idea but, I need some time to prepare. I’ll be back tomorrow right at dusk. It will give us the whole night.

Jasper: You’re kidding me. You issued a diamond-order and now you’re leaving me behind again? Seriously?

Steven: I know. I’m sorry. One last time, then I’ll make sure this works. I promise.

[noxiatoxia]

Sorry for the jankiness in this, I had to control both my Vita and PC at the same time, but here is a comparison! On the left, my fantranslation, and on the right, the official translation.

If you're wondering what this is all about, I'm working on a patch (at least of the prologue, I cannot promise the whole game) of SDR2, that aims to provide a more accurate experience than the official English translation.

More accurate how? Danganronpa not only suffers from a lot of mistranslations, but a handful of clunky dialogue and very literal translation choices that sacrifice nuance and an accurate experience for the sake of keeping the literal text. I want this patch to:

Fix all the mistranslations.

Add back in character accents, speech pattern quirks, and more accurately represent how they talk.

Fix the dialogue to sound more natural in English, as if these could be actual words spoken aloud (for the most part).

Give English players a version of the came that focuses more on capturing the spirit, energy, and emotion of the original dialogue than heavily focusing on providing the most literally accurate translation.

More on all these points under the cut.

What about other fantranslations? (orenronen, etc) I have not seen every conceivable English fan translation for SDR2, but a big one is orenronen's on SomethingAwful. It was never finished past chapter 3, but still stands as probably the most popular fan translation. Orenronen's work is extremely impressive given the speed and quality of the translations. That said, it is not without its mistakes, and I think suffers from perhaps taking too many liberties. I'm hoping my patch can strike a good balance between his and the official translation to deliver the most authentic experience possible.

So is this SDR2 "definitive" edition? Not exactly, I'll explain under the cut.

Big changes in this clip:

Added back in Souda's accent along with changing his name back. Tanaka's talent was also changed.

There is a joke that both I and the original English translation had to change as no English player would get it. You can read more about it in this post I made. (along with Jum-P being changed from Golden Hawk to Golden Eagle)

Komaeda speaks of Tanaka's time in the breeding/animal club, but as far as I'm aware, this is not a thing in many Western schools. The main gist of the text is Tanaka is amazing with breeding animals. The fact it was a club is irrelevant to the meaning, other than providing that he is a high schooler (which we already knew), so I cut it out to be more understandable to most English players.

Tanaka adds the part on about his hamsters not going easy on their enemies himself, the hamster doesn't say that. Kept the Hulk reference as it's a pretty apt translation and makes up for the missed reference from earlier. However I'm thinking of maybe changing the line afterwards to "they are not used to holding back" as that would be more accurate.

If you're interested in the details of this patch, please read below! I want this to be made for the fans by the fans, so any input is welcomed. If you have suggestions for how to improve text to flow better in English, or wish to correct/inquire about translation choices of mine, I more than welcome it. No matter how big or small, I want everyone to give their feedback and opinions and suggestions.

If you are interested in helping in the translation, be it from the perspective of a Japanese speaker, a play tester, or want to offer general writing/wording advice and feedback, please DM me. While I don't plan to form a team (I prefer to work alone), projects like this benefit greatly from opinions and feedback. Especially if you are familiar with both the official English and orenronen's version, I would appreciate your help. If a good number of people seem interested in helping, I may form a Discord or Tumblr community to facilitate discussion easier.

Welcome to under the cut. So, let's talk about that earlier point about definitive edition.

The thing is, save mistranslations, NISA (the official translation) and orenronen's versions of SDR2 are equally correct in some manner. NISA took a more literal approach to each sentence, while orenronen took more liberal approaches, instead going off what would sound best/fitting. Neither of these are incorrect. There is no "definitive" translation for any media in any language, but speaking from the perspective of Japanese -> English, there is rarely ever an exact way to be 1:1.

Let's take an example. The word "usagi" means "rabbit"...but it also means "bunny" and "hare". These are all relatively the same thing to the layman, but they impart different nuances. A character who chooses to only say "rabbit" instead of "bunny" may sound more intelligent or old-timey. So, how do you know which one to choose when it could be any 3? That's a very simplified version of the kind of choices you have to make in translation. When it comes to sentences that get longer and have more nuance even in the original Japanese language, you suddenly have a whole new beast to deal with.

You may have heard the common joke of "inexperienced translators" who translate the phrase "しょうがない" as "it can't be helped". Most English dictionaries will tell you this is what the phrase means, and yes, it is used in such a manner, but the fact is, most people do not say "it can't be helped". "I can't help but [...]" is much more common, but the standalone phrase is usually "it is what it is" or "that's just how things are", etc.

The phrase itself literally translates as "there is no method".

So, we have three versions of this phrase. The literal translation, the widely-posited English dictionary translation, and a naturalized version that is not literal to the actual Japanese word, but is an "equivalent" to what people would say in English. Which of these is more correct? Really...none of them. There is no more correct answer, just what sounds better or fits better.

This is all to say, my translation is going to be me doing the very, upmost best I can do to capture the meaning and nuance in all the words said, but also making it sound good and natural in English. This will inevitably include changing very cultural-specific things that English players wouldn't get, e.g. the Mutsugorou Kingdom joke Komaeda makes. As an English translation, I feel it is most important to naturalize it for an English audience. That is the whole point of translating from one language into another.

Above all, I will be honoring the feeling and meaning of the text rather than the literal words like NISA did. In other words, I would personally go with "it is what it is".

Keep in mind I am also one guy. I am not perfect in either language. Even people who speak English or Japanese as their first language make mistakes in them still, and translation only increases that chance. That's why extra eyes on this project helps. I do feel like I am a little out of my league, but at the end of the day, I'm doing this out of passion and fun. The official translation will still exist even if I make my own, so if anything, I'm hoping it provides a different experience that can help people grasp a closer meaning to the Japanese text.

Okay, let's get to the game stuff. Firstly, as you've seen, changes will be made to Character names/talents.

Ultimate Breeder -> Ultimate Animal Breeder. As funny as the implications are, his title was never meant to be confusing or ambiguous in the Japanese version.

Ultimate Musician -> Ultimate Pop Rock Musician. Mioda's title in the Japanese version is actually "Ultimate K-On Club Member", but was changed since most English players don't know what K-On is. It is most comparable to Pop Rock in terms of sound.

Soda Kazuichi -> Souda Kazuichi.

Kuzuryu Fuyuhiko -> Kuzuryuu Fuyuhiko.

Kirigiri Kyoko -> Kirigiri Kyouko.

A vote was held to keep Tanaka Gundham instead of Gundam or Gandamu (but this is subject to change depending on opinions I hear from others. His name is supposed to be a Gundam reference). A vote was also held to keep Hinata Hajime instead of Hazime.

Character Accents: As is with these types of games, the point is to have zany, eccentric characters who talk in zany, eccentric ways. Danganronpa is extremely hit or miss when it comes to carrying over these quirks. For the rest of this post I'll just be talking about SDR2 of course, but basically everything I say applies to the other Dangan games as well.

Some characters have their accents kept, at least in part, while others are just ignored. For example, Souda and Owari's accents were only sometimes kept, or watered down, while Usami's accent was removed entirely.

Speech quirks: This is largely context based. A cutesy girl using ね excessively comes off differently than a typical teenage boy using ね excessively, and will be translated differently...at least, that's how I view it. For the girl, I may make her speech more bubbly, cute, and appealing. For the boy, I would akin it more to going "like" or "um" a lot. Of course, if the boy is going for a cutesy image, or the girl is supposed to be mature, then I would flip this around. Like I said, this part depends 100% on context for each line.

Accurate representation: This one is a lot...but I'll try to boil it down. Japanese has several was to say "I" and "You"; different words and different ways to write those words. In fiction, this is usually a vehicle to tell you about the character's personality.

For example, among boys, it is common they will either use "boku" or "ore". "boku" is generally more polite than "ore".

However, there's multiple ways to write "ore". Hiragana, Katakana, or Kanji. The way it is written imparts a different impression. Hinata, for example, uses ore, kanji (俺) to refer to himself. Souda uses ore, katakana (オレ) to refer to himself. While this gives them both the impression of being masculine & impolite, Hinata using kanji gives the added impression of him being more intelligent and calm, while for Souda, katakana gives the impression of him being more abrasive and eccentric.

The meaning of what script is used also changes depending on context.

For example, for "you", both Hanamura and Komaeda use "kimi", which is a soft, friendly way to say "you" among friends. (Although, this is speaking strictly from the standpoint of fiction. You rarely use "you" in real Japanese. Anime characters do it all the time though, so it doesn't really count as "rude" by itself.)

However, Hanamura uses kimi, kanji (君) while Komaeda uses kimi, katakana (キミ). This both gives them the impression of being open and friendly, but for Hanamura, speaking with kanji makes it seem like he's being more proper and refined, and with Komaeda, speaking in katakana makes it seems like he's being more casual and laid back.

And then there are very unique "I" and "You" pronouns. Tanaka uses "ore-sama" (俺様) which sounds like he is saying "the great and amazing me", basically.

Ibuki says her own name, but this got translated poorly. Saying your own name as a first person pronoun, while not common, is more common in Japanese than English. Especially by kids and teen girls, it's seen as a cutesy thing. But it doesn't really come across like that in English. I will likely get rid of Mioda speaking in third person altogether, instead trying to incorporate this manner of speech into other forms, as it comes down to Mioda simply acting cute and eccentric. I think a good alternative is for her to occasionally speak of herself by saying "we" or "us", as that is not uncommon in English.

Similarly, Usami/Monomi talk with a cutesy ending. -desu becomes dechu, -masu becomes machu... "chu" is a very cute sound in Japanese, and it's supposed to drive home Usami's personality. I see this get translated as UwU speak a lot, which isn't incorrect, and in fact is a better translation than doing nothing like NISA did, but she does not speak with a speech impediment. It is only her endings that are modified. Me, personally, I will reword Usami to speak in a more simple, cute manner like a child show's protagonist, like Dora. I will also change some words to be cuter, like everybody -> everybunny, and you -> chu, but she will still speak normally.

And sometimes, pronouns change. Hinata uses omae (お前) to refer to other people, but for Monokuma, he's used omae (オマエ) before, changing the script to reflect his animosity.

This isn't even getting into honorifics or keigo. Honorifics (like -san, -kun, or no honorifics at all) reflect how respectful a character is of other characters. Similarly, "keigo", being often referred to as "polite speech", is commonly denoted by if a sentence ends in "-desu or -masu". Not speaking keigo in the situation these characters are in is a bit of a toss up. I wouldn't say it's automatically rude given they are all of the same age and status, and classmates don't always speak that way to each other either, but I would personally think most would approach this situation being polite when they're strangers.

There are also particles, some of which are more rude/masculine than other equivalent particles, or imperative speech, which is extremely rude (and not really ever used in real life).

On a politeness scale, for example...

Tsumiki uses keigo and uses -san for everyone, boys and girls. In the context of the rest of the cast, this sounds like she's speaking extremely politely and formally.

Komaeda does not use keigo but uses -san for girls and -kun for boys. He also uses "regular" particles. In context, this seems like he is speaking casually. Not rude, but not formal.

Hinata does not use keigo and does not use honorifics. He uses very masculine particles and is prone to using imperative form. In context, this seems like he is speaking extremely rudely.

Of course, NISA's version of SDR2 translates everything the same mostly since they go for a very literal approach, meaning these things that can't be translated into English all get translated the same, which is a shame. A lot is lost about how these characters speak and interact with the world. Specifically, Hinata suffers the most. Not just from stiff dialogue, but from getting his rude speech cut down immensely. The official art book for SDR2 claims that part of the design philosophy for Hinata was wanting to make a protagonist who was very masculine and direct. I want to keep that spirit in this patch, factoring in Hinata's choice in speech to influence how things get worded in English. While a sentence like なんだそれ！？Literally translates as "What is that!?", I would write it differently depending on the character after factoring in accent and everything we just talked about. "What the heck is that!?" for Souda, and "What the hell is that!?" (or even replacing hell with fuck in a tense situation) for Hinata, for example. For Komaeda, "What on earth is that!?" etc...

I think those are all the big points...if you've read this far, thank you :]

[rccxox]

I’m sorry, but as one of the many people who were there from the start this “apology” is truly baffling.

The only reason I kept asking Red and Flynn to handle this and DMs is that even if we go to the east common room Red has ignored the fact that there are other minors in here even if they go to the east common room it still makes them uncomfortable and I tried saying it but they didn’t get the hint. no offense, but the thing that pissed me off is how the mod team decided to give Crimson probation which was weird in my opinion and people were disgusted by it. Laci said she sent proof even though it was censored to protect those victims, 2 victims came forward and she decided not to give in to the fact Laci could send it to you UNCENSORED.

And when you started the apology (in Discord), I read it thoroughly, let’s break it down hm?

Here are the screenshots of Red’s apology if you fully want to read them.

The side server comment threw me off because if it happened there and you say “safe place” and apparently if it doesn’t happen here we’re all good. I understand if it’s something you normally don’t do.

But god forbid if we keep minors in our “safe space” safe.

“They’d been ‘investigating’ crimson on their own before digging up the nsfw stuff” First off, they were gathering up enough evidence for the proof you so desperately need and whine about.

“But they reported it literal hours after it happened so. Another lie.” I understand shit like this is severe and sensitive but damn I guess people don’t deserve time.

Do I need to explain the “crying wolf” is so disrespectful imo, but who would lie about something like this??

Heavily edited is so icky because Laci had them censored for the victims' comfort and you didn’t even see where she said she could hand it to you uncensored.

Happy to listen to our concerns but do a mass ban on people who spoke out? Okay…

There are, of course screen shots but Tumblr only has ten images per post (lmao)

Red also apologized to crimson which was so fucking weird to EVERYONE.

And for Flynn to come in, and this doesn't mean any disrespect when she started talking about how laci was stirring up in the middle of the drama, when all she did was give you all the evidence, The needed talked about how she was an unreliable source when she gave them ALL the evidence.

And when I told Flynn it was very disrespectful for her to say that she said that's what she noticed but Laci didn't mean any type of offense or disrespect and what matters if you want it uncensored evidence there's something called asking she would have provided it to you and when you sent that screenshot with who was a minor and who was an adult in the server I was just like did you actually see if she (laci) was okay with that being spread but I never got to that because I don't want to “start” more drama. People are upset with Red because she didn't acknowledge the 2 victims that have come forward and said that crimson has done that to them BOTH. kind of sounds like she (red) was victim blaming in my personal opinion, This was something they needed to talk out privately because it's easier to deal with the on one on one then rather than 600 people coming at red. There were new people coming into the chat, and they got caught in the hay fire because they didn't have the full picture. There's a reason we can't do this publicly because if you do this privately you can have awhile to dissect everything, and somebody told me “oh somebody would complain about the lack of transparency” but they could have said “we're gonna settle this in DMs. We're gonna mute this channel for a bit, and when I need to, I don't want to hear any more about it, because we're gonna deal with it in dm’s”. that's all they needed to know, there were people there who didn't have the full picture.

I'm really exhausted and it’s five in the morning .

[nerdieforpedro]

Part Six of "The Lake Between Us"

Gravitational Pull

Ezra AU x Seraphina (plus size OFC)

This fic is for those 18+ MDNI

Word Count: about 1.9k

Warnings: Mentions of all the food (sorry for making you hungry), implied sexual activity, Ezra is a softie, actual adult conversations (the humanity!), Sera and Ezra being sexy and cute (I very much enjoy these two - I'm also biased), two idiots (because they kinda are but it's good - I think)

Summary: Ezra and Seraphina are growing closer fairly quickly. Neither of them view this as a bad thing, but it warrants some conversations and a different kind of dinner.

Notes: Two more parts to go! I made use of a time skip. A good chunk of time passes in the part but it's to show the relationship progression for down the line. There's also two other interludes because of the story flow.

Main Masterlist/ Ezra Masterlist/ The Lake Between Us Series

Orbiting around each other for almost two months, it was surprisingly easy to fall into an exchange of their homes. Seraphina had opened hers first, leaving Ezra to do the same with his. Dinners were alternated as well: gumbo, stews, shrimp and grits, chicken and waffles and Ezra’s favorite that Sera made, jambalaya. He was fond of the sausage she used, letting the spices soak throughout the rice. The evenings became longer as they both lingered in each other's abodes.

Seraphina observed his bookshelves, one was filled with different first editions he’s collected over the years and the other had momentos and pictures from his life with Cee. A small child with cornflower hair smiled brightly in most of them as a younger Ezra held her, sometimes reading, other times sitting in a truck as they drove. His dedication to her upbringing was remarkable. He swears up and down it was just a promise he had to uphold. 

“I keep my honor intact in areas where it matters most in life my dear Moonbeam. That is all it was and is.” 

He can’t hide the small smile that appears each time he looks at her graduation photo. Nor does the gentleman hide how often his hands find their way to her hands, arms, and back. Not that his Moonbeam ever appeared to mind.

There were nights where Ezra would allow Sera to reveal different stories from career. He found it fascinating that a person could remain in the same profession for ten years. The changes she describes and the different facilities she’d worked in. The witnessed suffering, knowing there was little to be done for the patient or their family. The treatment of those in her profession and those associated with it. The physicality of what it means to perform different tasks and the skill it took.

Another two months of dinners brought the two of them closer together, learning about each other. Studying their bodies and sounds. There were times they parted, back across the lake, but oftentimes the nightly partners remained intertwined among limbs and sheets. Still having a drink before bed but not nearly as many. They were dulling each other's edges, making it easier to slip into their dreams. 

There were occasions when they laid awake, wordless as the radiance of the moonlight draped both of their forms; they did wonder if they were awake or asleep. It felt like such a pleasant notion to have someone who understands by your side.

Ezra got a call that Cee was coming back down with her girlfriend Zora on a short break between the summer sessions. They would be in around four in the afternoon. He was supposed to have dinner again with Seraphina, it’s become a near nightly staple, even when she’d have her shifts at the hospital. Ezra had told her to turn on the back porch light if she was willing to have company. Sera always made sure it was turned on after she got home and showered. Even if she fell asleep on the couch sitting next to him, she always thanked him for coming after curling up next to Ezra. 

While cooking for tonight’s dinner, the gentleman decided to make a bit more food. While putting some rolls in the oven, he called Seraphina to let her know. 

“Good afternoon Sundrop. How is the day treating you?” A familiar giggle is heard over the phone, she’d told him that she’d be out part of the day with her mother. He heard her mother in the background asking if that’s ’the handsome man with the good ass gumbo’ Ezra maybe poked fun at Sera about that a bit, even after making the matriarch his bread pudding two weeks ago. Sera’s mother still called him that or ‘skilled with his hands.’ 

“Well. I’m going to finish shopping with her and take her home. Then I’ll be on my way back. How are things on your end?” Sera’s mother pinched her cheek and laughed, taking the bags with her. She put them in the car. He smiled, knowing that her mother likely did something to make her yell, “Ma!”

“Sundrop. Cee called and said that her and her girlfriend are popping down for about a week between their sessions. I’m going to pick them up and they’ll come back to the house.” Ezra set the timer for his rolls and checked his shrimp, still sautéing in the frying pan, not quite as brown as he would like. 

“Alright. Did you want me to come and meet her? Or did you just want to spend time with Cee yourself?” Curious, what his answer would be and also to meet the fabled Cee. Ezra’s pride and source of joy. Was there room for her in his world? Or maybe not yet, it might be too soon.

“My dear, I don’t want to pressure you into meeting her. There will be other opportunities.” Ezra added some more butter, onions, peppers and some seasoning to the shrimp. “However, I am making plenty of food for you to join us tonight. If you wish.” Silence for a moment too long he feels. Things are too ambiguous. “Sera, it’s fine if-“

“I want to meet her, she’s important to you.” Sera’s mother protested being taken home wanting to eavesdrop a bit more, “I’ll call you again after I drop her off.”

“Of course. Talk to you then.”

Their conversation ended for now. It picked up again while Ezra was simmering the grits after finishing the shrimp.

Seraphina knocked on Ezra’s door. He answered in a white tank top, dark green apron and brown cargo shorts. He was barefoot with the fans going, it was too soon to turn the AC on, it was best to save for the nighttime. She walked in and brought chocolate cake she'd baked the night before and a fresh bottle of tequila. Following into the kitchen, Sera set the bottle down and placed a hand on Ezra’s back as he checked his pots.

“You know what’s important to me and that’s family. You were wonderful with my mother and she can be a handful. I don’t want to pressure you either. This is…” Pausing, she loses the words. Does he feel the same way that this is going somewhere? Is it really? They have just been rather casual about things with the exception of him meeting her mother. And maybe Sera mentioning him to her friends. Possibly only on her side she didn’t see it as casual.

Turning the heat down on grits, Ezra faced her head on. She looked up at him with the same honey orbs that held curiosity on the dock that afternoon. Now they held such trepidation. “This is something that’s been foreign to the both of us for quite a long time. A relationship, is it not?” Her flowing yellow dress appeared to glow in the artificial light of his kitchen. His hands found their way to her hips, where they tended to stay. “I would be overjoyed if you met Cee. Then she could put a face to the name of the woman I’ve been spending my time with and who has been helping me to sleep better. Giving me a bit more purpose.” Watching her face as he spoke, Ezra knew he may have said a bit too much, not unusual for him. He usually peppered it with innuendo to lighten things, but this wasn’t the time. 

“I suppose you’ll tell me next I shouldn’t have been so wrought with concern.” Pecking his lips to keep it light, the wide smile on her face was evident. “I’m not sure how long we’ll be together like this but I wouldn’t want to be with anyone else.”

“I should hope not. And you had the same concerns I did. I just know what I feel as well. I do hope we’ll be at this for a while yet. You aren’t going to be rid of me, are you Sundrop?” The grin found among Ezra’s patchy beard drew Sera’s hand to it as it had before. Shaking her head, she kisses him again letting herself linger. An arm snakes around her back before he draws his head back to go for her shoulder, he'd rather have her neck or chest. Ezra makes sure to keep in mind that his charge will be here with them for dinner and not leave any marks on her body as he normally does. 

“I’d be a fool to let a man like you go, .”

Before Ezra left to pick up Cee and Zora, Seraphina assisted him in cleaning the table before popping back to her house to freshen up a bit further. Both their bodies had become drenched with sweat and they’d need to change clothes. Ezra requested, however, that she not change her underwear and he wouldn’t either. Playfully slapping his arm, before capturing his lips once again, “Such a filthy scoundrel you are.”

“Since I am, will you help make me a new man by allowing me to see all of you again tonight? It can be wherever you like, as always, lady’s choice.” His hand cups her ass and squeezes. Keeping her near the door, not letting her leave quite yet.

“I think maybe I should. Since you’re such an honorable and changed man now. Let me go, I can’t be meeting Cee smelling of-“ Her laugh made him want to hold her longer.

“Neither of them would know anything about that type of smell, I hope. Besides, you smell divine.” Nuzzling into her black poofy tresses, he finally released her. “But if you must go. So be it. Remember my two requests, Sera.”

“I know. They’ll remain. Focus on getting those girls here safely please.”

“I can think of more than one thing at a time. See you back here tonight.”

They parted ways as Ezra tracked to pick Cee and Zora up and Sera washed up and dried out her dress. She’d keep the yellow dress on a bit longer. He was right, it did smell of him, not as strong as when she first came home. Having Ezra scent around her was as much of a comfort as it was a source of arousal. She needs to focus on the former for dinner tonight. 

Seraphina was going to meet face to face with the fabled Cee, she was only a little nervous. Little did she know Cee was as well. When was the last time she was this invested in a relationship? Not since college and this one was certainly a lot more healthy. Sera felt she could have worded it better, but she’s been nervous about bringing it up, always was. Per usual, Ezra made her feel like her worrying was totally normal and so was how strongly she felt about him. If he were to pull away from her, she would just hold on tighter, hoping that he would feel the same.

Ezra was humming to a song he hadn’t heard in years, “Day Dreaming.” He laughed because the last few months has felt like consecutive pleasant dreams. He was sure he was aware though. Maybe this is what he should be doing and where he should be. As Ezra drove, he was more sure in comparison to even half an hour ago - even if she fell out of love with him, he would long for her.

Chapter Five

Chapter Seven

Interlude One

Interlude Two

Taste-testers of Ezra’s gumbo 🍤: @rav3n-pascal22 @maggiemayhemnj @morallyinept @survivingandenduring @bonezone44 @magpiepillsjunior @yorksgirl @gemmahale @missredherring @missladym1981 @alltheglitterandtheroar @megamindsecretlair @readingiskeepingmegoing @pedroshotwifey @tinytinymenace @inept-the-magnificent @vivian-pascal @jessthebaker @littlemisspascal

[sapphosremains]

Hi! I’ve been religious my whole life, but I’ve been feeling the urge to become more dedicated lately. I pray most nights (sometimes I forget) and I feel I have room in my heart and life for Jesus. I was wondering if you have any tips for ways to incorporate faith into your life in more tangible ways? Like, ways that are harder to forget. Like a prayer book or anything like that. Little ways, you know?

I’m sorry if this was too vague!! I can elaborate if it’s helpful.

hey anon!

that’s so lovely, i’m so glad to hear it, and it sounds like you’ve got amazing practices already. if forgetting is an issue (definitely was for me), it’ll definitely get easier with routine as you build a habit, and also as you grow your relationship with God it’ll become something you feel that longing to do, so you’ll forget less. for now, reminders could definitely help if praying every day is a practice you want to start.

i’ll answer this as non-denominationally as i can - also as i’m anglocatholic i'm a lot more varied in my practices, so take what you want and what works for your faith, and don’t worry if something doesn’t work at all!

in terms of daily prayer, i would really recommend the book of common prayer! different denominations use different editions - i go to a church of england church, so i use the same BCP edition as the cofe, which is the 1662 version, for example. that version, and a contemporary version, can be found in an app called ‘daily prayer’, as well as on the cofe website, and i’m sure other places. apps and websites like that find things like the psalms, lessons, and collects for you, otherwise you can use a physical or digital bcp alongside a bible, lectionary, and collect book to find the appropriate things to put in. it sounds complicated but if you start with an app or website that does it for you you’ll understand quickly! i like to read the psalms and readings from my bible, just using the app to find them, because it feels best for me. eventually i’ll graduate to using a physical bcp book when im brave enough! if you’d like more info on praying the daily office using the bcp or other material lmk bc i spent ages researching trying to understand how to pray with it :)

another thing i do is keeping a bible on me 99% of the time. as i used to go to an anglican school, we received the new testament and psalms when we started secondary school in a tiny little book, which is super easy to carry around.

if you’d like to incorporate prayer into your life more generally, i’d suggest improving your instinct to turn to god. one thing i’ve always struggled with is blaspheming, always going ‘oh my god!’ whenever something went wrong. i saw a really good tip (please shout anyone if you know who said this!) that suggested to turn any ‘oh my god’ etc of anger into a genuine prayer. instead of frustration and blasphemy, use that opportunity and reminder of Him to pray for the situation that is aggravating you. another thing is crossing yourself whenever feels right - maybe if you need support, or are struggling, or want to make a quick prayer for a passing ambulance etc. it’s a nice habit to be in.

i also learnt some short psalms, or declarations of faith like the Nicene creed and Apostles creed. these are quite soothing and if you’re in a difficult situation and need a second to calm down, just quietly reciting a psalm is a prayer to god, gives you the space and time to calm down while focusing on something else, and use His Word.

the other thing if you’re more catholic leaning could be a rosary! if you’re not catholic and a little uncomfy with the hail mary’s, swap them out for a creed, the lord’s prayer, or the jesus prayer, or something else. sometimes i pray the catholic rosary, other times my own version using the creeds, the lord’s prayer, glory be’s, and the jesus prayer, using the same method as the catholic rosary. otherwise you can make a shorter rosary. it’s a nice physical reminder that you can carry with you, or just do in your head.

a cross, crucifix, medal, or other religious necklace is also a nice reminder. it reminds me of my faith, my commitments, and i also hope that it’s a message to others that i am a safe loving person who they can turn to in times of need, although not sure that’s what people take from it now unfortunately :(

that’s all i can think of for now, but do get in touch again if you have any questions! i'll be praying for you.

may the Lord bless you and keep you x

[redacted-coiner]

Extra

Hey, just wanted to mention I do plan to continue to make arissomei terms, or whatever the other titles are.

I'll admit I can't mentally detach myself. I keep forgetting the other words that have been made to replacements but in the end, i don't know if i personally can change how i make my things. I will most likely forget, a lot. I'm sorry. I understand why the change happened, but I don't know if i can just, do that. I understand it may seem weird, completely understandable. I struggle with spelling, words, reading, etc. Changing things like this can be difficult to change. To a point, I will keep my language the same being it's a sense of familiarity and it can be just easier to keep it the same rather than change. "just edit the words", yeah, but that doesn't mean i won't forget? My memory is shit and I also am a damn system so shit will mix. things won't stay. I support everyone who changes the wording for the sake of the creator. But realistically for myself, I don't think I'll be able to just change it right away.

I apologize for just, dumping this shit. But it's on my mind due to the whole thing. I don't have male intent, I want to make my language grow over time but I also know I can't change it right away when it's something that can make me feel comforted. I respect all the decisions. I just ask that you all respect my change, even if it takes...way too long. @acetrappolaswife (just tagging so u see)

[psi-ness]

here in the el noli fandom, i like to excel in making content no one ever asks for, so in this episode, i am going to compare

translations of macaraig's introduction across english translations !!!

will we find a winner? who knows, honestly please don't take this so seriously, i just want an excuse to gush over him !!

disclaimer: i am only judging based from vibes and how comprehensible it is, i cannot judge based on how faithful it is to jose rizal's original writing because i don't know spanish

starting off with the translation i had for the longest time, the penguin classics edition of el fili, translated by harold augenbraum

1.) harold augenbraum

rating - 4/10

- it's ok... i think because it's what i'm most familiar with, it made sense at first and sounded pretty, even, but compared to other english translations it just falls flat

- if your vocabulary is lacking, so many phrases here just don't make sense. what does "ardent casuists in the university cloister as a dialectician" mean. what the fuck is a "happy youthful acquaintance"

- continental gallant sounds kinda hot at least. i assume it means he acts like a european gentleman because continental = europe. at least that's what merriam webster said. it paints a picture in your head that he's very cultured but the wording sounds so colonial mentality haha (oh so europe is more refined/cultured???)

- furthermore if that's what continental gallant means, then that whole sentence is just redundant. "fine manners" "elegant" WE GET IT HE'S BEAUTY HE'S GRACE

- "he occupied just two rooms in the house" is a funny sentence. like yeah he just has two rooms what a loser !! on top of having a servant and a personal cochero 🙄🙄🙄 he's so poor !!

2.) leon ma. guerrero

rating - 6.5/10

- finally the university segment part of the paragraph makes sense

- "reputation for manliness" is a CRAZY phrase, they out here making my man sound like an alpha not that i'm complaining um-

- again with the excessively fancy words: unobtrusive munificence (apparently it means he's generous with money without calling too much attention to himself about it, which seems to be unique to this translation among the ones i've listed here)

- THIS TRANSLATION however gets brownie points for describing macaraig as high-spirited like !!! that is so cute !!! so he's not just a rich gentleman with fine manners but he's also a bubbly and excitable guy??? i NEED him to have my firstborn sorry

- this is a skill issue but i needed to look up what the meaning of gig and groom was in the sentence

3.) charles derbyshire

rating: 7/10

- i appreciate the attempt at diversifying macaraig's description by saying he's "fastidiously dressed" instead of repeating elegant

- so much easier to understand because the words are less fancy/flowery. it's like it's meant to be read by someone LMAO

- robust carriage isn't as clear to me tho. like is this supposed to mean he's a little muscular or fit cuz robust ???? ang sexy talaga ng bebe ko SORRY SORRY

- it probably just means hes healthy and well ❤️ naol

- what can i say. it's very straightforward. gets the job done.

4.) camilo osias

rating - 6/10

- chandelier is so out of left field because all the other translations talked about having a servant or his own kalesa, WHERE DID THE CHANDELIER COME FROM

- "good build" sounds like another attempt at talking about his fit physique and i am here for it i always pictured him to be buff in my head heuehuehdhdj malapit na tayo sa dulo guys onting tiis lang sa pagfafangirl ko 😭😭😭

- it's a decent translation, nothing to write home about. i realize also that this and derbyshire word the modern ideas part as "he is not very far behind" versus other translations that are firm with saying "he is not far behind." the very makes a difference wala lang haha

5.) ma. soledad lacson-locsin

rating - 9/10

- general feedback on lacson-locsin's translation but i appreciate the way she keeps some words that are difficult to translate into english and just footnotes it !! it's sooo helpful

- he sounds delicious, what can i say. even when the elegant part is all redundant

- no confusing words thrown in at all, mwah writing, straightforward writing but still pretty enough for me to feel smart reading it thank you /lh

- also the only translation from here that uses c for his name

- score isnt perfect bc idk, im bad at scoring

- p.s. guys do NOT just google araña you are gonna get pics of spiders di ako natutuwa 🥲🥲🥲

winner: ma. soledad lacson-locsin !! pagpugayan po natin siya 👏👏👏

also as a bonus, here are some commonalities across all translations

- he's rich as FUCK

- macaraig being described as a dialectician (contrary to the root word it's supposed to mean he's good at philosophy and debate)

- has servants, obviously. and two luxuriously furnished bedrooms to himself in the dorm

- he's only studying law to have an academic degree (so he's not studying to be a practicing lawyer?? what does that mean. that's like saying you're taking up medicine just so you can have a license)

- he's beauty, he's grace, i want to kiss him in the face

[justajsworkshop]

Thank you.

I'll keep this short but- I had taken a break for a few months. The entire states thing did not do me any good. When I came back, I read too much tumblr, twitter and reddit and now I'm confused on how to proceed.

I came across your blog yesterday and on skimming through a couple of your asks, you seem to not stick to the traditional rules and terminology which I truly appreciate. And I hope you can give me some advice.

-1) The lack of guidelines is making me feel kinda scared. One person tells that all there's left to do is decide, another tells that we have to 'know' it into being. Too much info has left me confused. I think I used feel safe when I knew I just had to do x, y and z and then I'll have what I want. How can I navigate through this? Everything feels kinda mixed up, if that makes sense

2)So, I read this-> https://www.tumblr.com/justajsworkshop/761700924577267712/im-the-anon-who-wanted-to-cry-this-is-silly-but?source=share

ask, because this was one of the questions I had. And the last sentence you wrote was-'manifesting is just choosing what that narrative is.' Do I choose and then...just leave it? I dont react to anything that contradicts what I chose? And where does faith/knowing come into play in all this?

I'm sorry if I sent anything that violates your ask policy. I'll send another ask if it did. Thank you for your time and help❤️

mmm, okay. so, i'm going to address a few of the specific lines you said here, and i think one thing you'll find when getting "answers" from me is that i tend to veer toward posing more questions to you, but my intention is that the questions will help you source answers from yourself instead of an outside god.

i want to give you a quick heads up that this is egregiously long (even by my standards) with minimal proofreading, and it's also very direct. so i recommend reading at a time when you're not feeling super sensitive or precious about yourself. as i say with everything i write, take what resonates. leave what doesn't. trust yourself more than you trust me.

I think I used feel safe when I knew I just had to do x, y and z and then I'll have what I want. How can I navigate through this?

preface: i generally don't answer "how" questions, but this is an open enough one that you actually captured the essence of why i ask people not to start with the word "how." people often want me to tell them what to do, but you're asking how to understand something in a different way. just adding this note here for future reference for other folks.

i'll be direct here: you used to find safety in a step-by-step process because it was easier for you to trust a process instead of trusting yourself.

truthfully, if you want to continue perceiving yourself, reality, and manifestation that way, there's nothing inherently wrong with that. your experience is entirely subjective to your preferences and not what anyone else says.

that being said, the reason i personally caution against putting your faith in processes above all is that what happens when a process "doesn't work?" what happens when results start taking longer or something else happens? and you start spiraling because you believe the process failed you; therefore, you're doing it all wrong, and you spin a narrative that you must be missing something, blah blah blah. the cycle of eternal seeking starts all over again because what you're really seeking is yourself.

anytime you create an external god, they are bound to let you down. plain and simple. so, who is your faith and trust secure in? I AM.

I AM is the ultimate process. I AM is the method, the way, the how, and the shift. I AM is just your awareness of being. you're aware that you exist, right? you didn't have to follow any process or technique or learn anything to know you exist. you just know because you just are.

(i have tons of posts on your awareness, but the most useful ones are linked in my pinned post.)

i always edit descartes' famous "i think; therefore, i am" to be extra redundant for the sake of emphasis: i exist; therefore, i am. and this leads me into this question of yours:

Do I choose and then...just leave it? I dont react to anything that contradicts what I chose?

we manifest who and what we are conscious of being. your narrative of being isn't just a one-time decision, although it is entirely possible to manifest by deciding once (i do it often). but i want you to pan out and look at the whole forrest and not just the trees.

who do you say you are?

if god were to look at you—to peer into your heart and mind—what's your attitude about yourself and life? what does god see in you? do you perceive yourself as someone who gets what they want? as someone who's capable? as someone who, even if they don't have all the answers now, can and will figure it out for themselves?

as i wrote in a post recently, if the term "states" isn't helpful for you, try attitude, as i find that it encompasses thoughts, feelings, and the perception of self in a way that makes the whole greater than the sum of its parts.

i'm going to reflect back something you said to show you the kind of attitude i'm getting from you (in this small snippet; i know there's more to you than what you wrote here):

The entire states thing did not do me any good. When I came back, I read too much tumblr, twitter and reddit and now I'm confused on how to proceed. I AM someone who is always chasing the right answer. i want to know the right way to do things because i don't trust myself to be the way. i need someone or something outside of me to instruct me because see the process or someone else's word as a greater authority over my word. I AM confused. I AM not worthy of my trust.

god is looking at all that stuff in italics, and god loves and trusts you enough that it said, anything you ask for in my name (the name of I AM, i.e., it is your nature to identify yourself a certain way), it will be added onto you. no ifs, ands, or buts. you ask for it in the name of god, I AM that I AM, it's yours.

so, what does the person who says "I AM confused" and "I AM not worthy of my trust" manifest? an experience of seeking, confusion, overwhelm, and doubt.

I dont react to anything that contradicts what I chose?

you can be non-reactive, but also you don't have to gaslight yourself into unhealthy emotional places. it's not about not reacting; it's about seeing the greater picture. person A says "I AM confused" and treats that as the end. they're literally... living in the end of being confused, and guess what they manifest. person B says, "I AM confused, AND i will figure this shit out." what's the difference between person A and person B? attitude. it's their perception of self and the situation to recognize that everything they're seeing and experiencing rn isn't the full story.

reacting isn't the end of the world. ffs, feel your feelings and do what you need to do to process in healthy ways because repression is just resistance. as neville said, "when you resist evil, you give it your attention; you continue to make it real." in this case, "evil" refers to anything you don't want.

so, if you keep trying "not to react" but it's coming from a place of repressing and pushing it away, you actually end up crediting the undesirable more, and this is why people who go the "fuck the 3D route" tend to get shit exploding back in their face. because they literally say "the 3D is fucked, fuck you" ... and then welp, the 3D fucks them back. like, it has no free will. it has to.

you and reality are one. there is no separation. it's not even just that reality is a mirror or that reality is your thoughts pushed out: all of physical reality is actually happening INSIDE you because physical reality is happening inside the mind of god. and you, your true divine self, are one with the father of all existence.

what makes manifesting confusing as fuck is when people identify with their limited, human self over their divine, limitless, eternal self. as reverend ike says, the only problem man ever has is not knowing himself, not identifying himself correctly.

you'll see it in a bunch of my posts that the first and ONLY step to manifest is to "be still and know that I AM god." and you can actually even chop that down to "know that I AM god" because when you identify as god above all, how can you NOT be one with your desires? how can you be anything else but unbothered and eternally fulfilled? because god is all things, has all things, and through whom all things are possible.

my advice is stop asking how and to start asking who. ask yourself who you really are. ask your true self to reveal themselves to you. ask yourself who do i say i am? and you'll start seeing things not through your physical, limited eyes but through the eyes of god.

anyway, i'm sorry this got so fucking long, and i hope that there was at least a nugget or two in here that helped you. the short of it is, manifesting isn't about how or when or if; it's always about who. who do you say you are? and that will be added onto you because god put all its faith into you to give you the free will to choose your conception of self.

[glatisant-questing]

Souma's Short Story from the Manyo no Shou Limited Edition Booklet

Souma's the most hardworking and conscientious boy:D

This SS was written by 長野 和泉

*fixed some errors after posting, sorry for those who have read the first version...

“Yukimura senpai! The dishes are done!” I finished washing the dishes we used for lunch and asked Yukimura senpai for the next instruction. 

“You’re done already? That was fast, Souma-kun.”

Yukimura senpai said in an impressed tone. 

“I checked carefully after I finished washing the dishes, so there shouldn’t be any stain left…” 

As I was talking, I noticed something and stopped midsentence. 

“Souma-kun? What’s the matter?” 

“…Senpai, you look pale. Are you okay?” 

“Really? I slept late last night, so maybe that’s why…” 

She said and gently rubbed her eyes. There were faint dark circles under her eyes and she looked very sleepy. 

“Lately, the number of soldiers has increased, and everyone seems busy. With more people comes more things to do, right?” 

“Yeah, that’s true.” 

Some things can become easier with more people, but here in the Shinsengumi, many tasks just can’t be delegated to others. 

For the simplest example, with more soldiers joining in, chores such as cooking, laundry, and room accommodation also increase accordingly. Those things quietly fell on the shoulders of Yukimura senpai, Inuoe-san, and others.

(If only I were more capable…) 

I thought so, and can’t help but feel gloomy.

“Souma-kun, are you okay? you look a bit down.”

I felt awkward when Senpai noticed my feelings, so I hurriedly put on a smile. 

“No, it’s just…I was thinking that if Nomura and I were more reliable, we wouldn’t have to burden Senpai so much.” 

Hearing my words, senpai widened her eyes in surprise. But soon she smiled and said… 

“Souma-kun, it’s very kind of you to say so. Thank you.” 

“No, not at all…” 

I thought inwardly that there was nothing kind about me in the current situation where I couldn’t be of any help to Senpai. 

But Senpai said to me, “Please don’t feel worried. I’m really grateful to Souma-kun and Nomura-kun." 

“That’s not true…I’m sorry for being such a nuisance!” 

“No, no, I’m telling the truth. You both really are helping me.” 

“Really?” 

“Yes, of course. Especially Souma-kun. You’re very reliable and you always do more than what I ask you to.” 

“…Thank you very much.”

 Senpai is kind-hearted. Her words are not completely false, but I’m sure there’s plenty of exaggeration to cheer me up. 

I thought that I had to grow up more as a Shinsengumi soldier to repay this kindness. 

"Senpai, since I finished washing the dishes and have some free time, can you give me the next instruction?"

“In that case…it’s almost time to go shopping for dinner, so can you come with me? I’m supposed to go with Inoue-san, but it would be easier if there was another man.” 

“Shopping? No problem, but…senpai, are you feeling unwell?” 

“Do I look like that?” 

“Yes, a little…” 

“I’m just a little sleepy, so I’m fine. I think the sleepiness will go away if I walk for a little.” 

“I hope so…” 

After finishing her errands, Yukimura Senpai came to the hall to call me.

 "Souma-kun, sorry to keep you waiting. Let’s go, shall we?”

 “Senpai, about that…” 

It was a bit hard, but I confessed. 

“I’ll go shopping with Inoue-san and Nomura, so please stay and have some rest, senpai.” 

“Huh? But…I’m fine…” 

“…I understand how you feel, but I’m still worried. If something should happen to you on the way, I’ll regret it forever.” 

“It…it’s not that I’m sick or anything…” 

Senpai didn’t seem convinced by my argument. 

"There are many rōnin in Kyoto who know the faces of Shinsengumi soldiers. If I take Senpai away like this and can’t protect you, I’ll regret it forever. I talked to Inoue-san earlier and he also agreed with me.”

She seemed a bit disappointed, but she gave up when she learned that it was a decision made after consulting with Inoue-san. 

“…I see, I understand. Then I’ll do as you say today. But I’ll definitely make up for it later.” 

“Don’t worry about it. I just did what I had to do as a Shinsengumi soldier.” 

“But still, let me help you with something later, as a thank-you.” 

She spoke softly, but Yukimura Senpai seemed adamant about this. 

Maybe this was her pride as a Senpai. 

"Alright. I’ll look forward to it then.”

“Yeah, sure.” 

After saying that, senpai looked up at the sky with a slightly lonely expression. 

“…But Souma-kun, you’ve grown so much since you joined the Shinsengumi. I feel a little jealous that you’ve surpassed me.”

 “Surpassed you? I’m not even close, Senpai!” 

Then Senpai smiled at me.

 “Souma-kun, I think you’re overestimating me, but still, when you say that, I feel like I have to do better as a senpai. Well, I’ll be resting in my room. Please send my greetings to Inuoe-san.” 

After saying that, Yukimura senpai turned and walked away.

“Yes, I will!”

 As I watched her slender figure disappear down the hallway, I thought to myself. 

(The reason why I can grow as a Shinsengumi soldier is because of you. You’ve been guiding me all along, Yukimura senpai.) 

After saying that in my heart, I headed to the kitchen to see Inuoe-san.

Some time later. 

Kondo Kyokucho was out for the day, so I was excited to help Senpai today, but she proposed to make up for the other day. 

“I’ll work extra hard today, so I want you to rest for the day, Souma-kun.” 

But I couldn’t just accept that and say yes. It would be wrong to let Senpai work while I rest on a non-holiday. 

While these thoughts were turning in my head, I asked Senpai for a favor. 

“If you want to make up for the other day, then I have a favor to ask…can you make my hometown flavor…my hometown’s cuisine with me next time?” 

“…Of course! I’d love to.” 

Yukimura senpai senpai smiled and accepted my offer. 

—- the end—-

[crimeronan]

hi!! sorry if this has been asked before but i wanted to know if u had a specific editing process? ive read before that u edited ur fics for 6-8 hours and wanted to know what those hours consisted of, technically speaking, if its not too much trouble!!

hello!!

this is a really good question. i want to do it justice but breaking down every single detail of my editing process would take a VEEEERY long time. so i'll give more of an overview

some fics have a Much more involved editing process than others. so i can walk you through what both "processes" look like, step-wise. my most involved process produces the best work but is also the most time-consuming and exhausting.

to start, though: you gotta understand my first draft process. because whenever i tell other writers about how i draft, their responses range from "that's insane" to "that's so smart" to "that's insane. again."

i don't reread anything when i draft.

and i mean Anything. i don't reread a single sentence. i don't reread my phrasing as i'm writing it. i don't even check to make sure that my sentences make sense.

i just write out the entire story as i'm hearing / imagining it in my head. whatever moments, beats, dialogue, Whatever is most important to me. i don't edit as i go, i don't look back. if i can't think of details or lose my flow, i put [add X here] and keep going.

i usually have a bullet-point outline before i draft -- that's my scribbled concept sketch. my first draft is the equivalent to the slightly less scribbly concept sketch. it takes a MAXIMUM of one-third of my entire writing time.

the other two-thirds (or more!) are editing.

so basically. editing is where i reread what i wrote, identify weak spots and pacing issues, revise my dialogue, improve my metaphors, bulk up my imagery..... it's like doing all of the painstaking lining and coloring and shading of a very involved art project.

with my Most involved editing process, i open a new document beside the first draft. i write an entire second draft from scratch, using my first document as reference. that lets me keep all the important beats, rearrange stuff, go more in-depth with detail, etc. THEN i reread that second draft and do all of my fussing.

with my less involved editing process, i just reread and edit the first draft instead of creating an entire second draft. i also do fewer editing passes.

(the involved process includes editing the whole document once, putting it down for a few hours, then starting over from the beginning and editing the Edited Version all over again.)

it might be easier for me to show you the differences in fic quality, for you to get a sense of how the editing process affects things.... rather than trying to describe exactly what i look for / change / do / etc.

so. here's three recent (ish) toh fics

humans are friends. AND food - no editing.

why did love put a gun in my hand (and all other parts of this series) - basic first draft editing.

what we are is the sum of a thousand lies - 2 to 3 full drafts per chapter, 3 to 5 editing passes per chapter, ~30,000 words of outtakes beyond that.

with that vampire AU fic (#1), you can see that it's short, it's quick, it's silly and fun. it's not emotionally deep. it doesn't make much sense. it's very clearly based on Vibes instead of a fully considered story.

the princess luz fic (#2) is Significantly more involved. the increased detail here is partially because this is a horror series instead of a stupid humor romp, but the principle is the same.

all of luz's internal narration about her fear, the pacing of her interactions and confrontations with belos n hunter alike, the ugly body horror and the way she comforted the dying grimwalker... that's all from the editing process. the bare bones were there in my first draft, but my edits were where i got to make things Effective.

basically, i wrote the horror story the way i saw it in my mind. and then during the edit, i could ask questions like - what would make this worse? what is she really afraid of? what is the most LUZ reaction that she could have in this situation? what's the most effective way to show the differences between this luz and canon luz, and the similarities? etc etc etc. all those little details!

then you have wwaitsoatl. which is by Far the most energy-intensive fic i've ever written. that's part of why updates are so sporadic despite there being well over a thousand subscribers at the moment (FAR more than any of my other fics have ever had).

the reason that this fic requires so many drafts and editing passes is because of the sheer complexity of the characterization. the plot is pretty generic, as toh fics go - hunter gets kidnapped away from the castle and learns how to be loved, this fic has been written 100000 times before in 100000 different ways by 100000 different authors.

BUT. every single one of the four narrators in this particular story is unreliable in different ways. every single one has different priorities, motivations, baggage, feelings, levels of emotional intelligence. all four of them are in massive conflict with one another.

the conflicts Between the characters are similarly complicated, so i have to spend a LOOOONG time on all of the dialogue & interactions. these guys do a LOT of projecting, and arguing, and talking at cross-purposes, and making incorrect assumptions, and lying, and obfuscating, and on and on and on. clear communication is basically impossible.

the internal narration also requires a similar level of care. hunter and darius in particular have incredibly challenging POVs to write because all of their narration is tied up in denial, self-delusion, and facades.

hunter's nightmares, cognitive dissonance, and slow breakdowns take Hours And Hours And Hours to get right. same goes for darius's feelings and the things he says and the things he Doesn't say. i literally study every single individual sentence and rewrite it like 15 times, then study every individual paragraph and rewrite and rearrange them like 15 times. and if a scene isn't working, i cut it entirely, even when that adds up to 30,000 words of outtakes.

it's my most ambitious fic by a longshot and i'm confident in saying it's my best work to date. but hoo boy, it is WORK.

so. that's my editing process, basically! and how my editing process changes my final product.

[kamirai-k]

Hi, so, I wanted to talk about the fanfics you write, like, how many days, weeks does it take more or less for you to finish one. Or if you have more or less idea when you're going to release a new one (sorry if I'm pressuring you) Bcs unfortunately I'm the type who finishes reading and already wants more, that is, you got me addicted to your fanfics (obviously I love that), I also wanted to know if it's tiring for you to write, Do you have breaks? Or do you write directly? These are the mini-questions — not even half of them — for you. I just really admire the fact that you write such unique and well-crafted things for free, I really appreciate our fandom having someone like you to help you get on your feet! So really, thank you very much. I know how hard it is to come up with ideas to write, and even more so the extensive way you work.

Sorry if this question is a crap to read, all I can do is use Google translate and trust in my little knowledge of English :')

Eagerly waiting for another fanfic, I hope you have a good rest.

Oh my God hi!!!

Don't worry at all I personally love getting asks! It is so fun and I love answering questions so this is great! You're not pestering me at all.

Let's get to the questions shall we!

#1) Well, typically when it comes to writing I write around the night time because it just is a lot easier for me to write at night. I have so much going on during the day but it takes me around 2 hours to write 2K and I try to write everyday. So by the end of the week I have a lot written that's for sure.

It typically takes me a week to write a fic and edit one. And that's only because I read a lot if I were to just write my 2K everyday I would probably have a fic written every day but I cannot do that because most of the time I end up writing more than I first thought i would.

Then there's the process of editing which is a lot of work. TT

#2) I always plan out when I wanted to release my fics. When I finish a chapter I always look at which days I'm able to post it after I have edited and made sure everything is okay so that I can read people's comments as fast as I can.

(Comments terrify me but I love getting them! Gimmie gimme gimme (⁠つ⁠✧⁠ω⁠✧⁠)⁠つ)

Don't worry at all I'm also the type of finishes reading and once more and I have a friend who is a part of the fandom who is just like you who is always asking for more and I love them for that because it keeps me motivated to keep on writing! So I personally love it when people ask for more (as long as they are respectful and not rude of course) because it's just great to know that people like my work enough.

#3) The reason why I write 2K is because after that I do get tired writing more than that a day can be very draining for me so I do take breaks somewhat. It's more like I write 2K and then I go to bed and then I get up and do my day time things and write at night.

Thank you so much for your kind words!

This is so nice I really have trouble with really understanding that people actually like what I make so you saying that you're addicted to my fics makes me so happy hehe. It's nice.

Thank you so much for your kind words and just so you know I love the fanfics that you posted them too.

They are so cute and I love them a lot. I eat them up and every time I get notification that you posted a little fanfic I scream with happiness because they're just so cute.

- sincerely Kami

[snootlestheangel]

L: How many times do you usually revise your fic/chapter before posting?

F: Share a snippet from one of your favorite dialogue scenes you’ve written and explain why you’re proud of it.

M: Got any premises on the back burner that you’d care to share?

L: usually most chapters get a good once over just to make sure there's not any glaring mistakes but also I have a really bad habit of just saying "fuck it" and hitting post 😅

M: I have so many ideas on the back burner it's honestly sad. But the one I'll share here is an AU where the Riley family survived, and Ghost keeps a good relationship with them. I might make a separate post to go more in depth cause it's kinda complicated to explain. It features silly goofy drunk!Ghost though at one point

F: this is gonna be a really long snippet but it's one of my top favorites I could think of off the top of my head. The mental chess between Laswell and Price is one of my favorite things to write

Snippet is from ch. 6 in Silence is Golden But Consequences Are Red so if you don't want to read it, I understand. (For those that do read it, sorry if it's hard to follow at points. It's a bit easier to follow in context and is older writing and needs edited (I posted the first chapter to this fic almost a year and a half ago and my writing has actually improved since)

:"Why were these particular weapons dealers selling to Las Almas? I mean, what business has a Mexican drug cartel have to do with European weapons dealers?"

"That we still don't know, but hope to find on the drive. Pretty lucky of our boy Soap to get this." Price quirks an eyebrow at Laswell, but doesn't respond to her comment.

"Can we assume Ghost still knows this information? The stuff about Las Almas being involved?" Price asks, and Laswell narrows her eyes, a sly smirk crossing her features as she debates commenting on Price's avoidance of her obvious accusation that Soap didn't merely get lucky.

"Most likely. It's pretty clear this information wasn't as valuable to protect. It's possible he could have seen something before obtaining the flash-drive. Makes you wonder how he got it in the first place." Price matches Laswell's mischievous smile, but once again avoids changing the topic.

"Will we be sent to Las Almas?" Laswell's smile drops and is instead replaced with a glare of frustration.

"Yes. I've already contacted someone I know down there. Colonel Alejandro Vargas with Los Vaqueros, Mexican Special Forces. He'll set you guys up with a place to stay and anything else you need. Think Ghost will be in town with your team?" Laswell's voice drips with confidence as she tries to pry into Price's thoughts. Price leans forward, folding his hands on his desk. Laswell remains calmly relaxed in her seat, not giving any sign of backing down.

"What are you trying to ask me, Kate?" She chuckles at the use of her first name, knowing Price is done beating around the bush.

"I believe you and Sergeant MacTavish didn't tell the full truth about how he obtained the flash-drive. If it weren't for how rattled he was, I would be inclined to believe Ghost was never involved." Price drops his head as a few small chuckles rattle through his chest.

"That's a bold accusation, Laswell."

"It's well-founded."

"Is it now?"

"Yes. I saw the looks you and the sergeant exchanged during yesterday's meeting with General Shepherd. He didn't appear to be on the same page as you about the whole situation. Perhaps a miscommunication about what the report was going to be?" Laswell replies, and Price's smile darkens as he narrows his eyes again. Laswell uncrosses her legs and leans forward, elbows resting on her knees.

"Very good observation, I did indeed say something the sergeant would not have expected. But, what I said is true. You saw how Soap was during that meeting. His encounter with Ghost was... rough. He was shaking like a leaf when I got to him. At first, I didn't think much of it, but you have so much faith in him and Garrick I figured there was more to the story. I tried going over the mission during our return with him, but he wasn't all there." Laswell forces a smile as she tilts her head in thought.

"You're right. Sergeant MacTavish is an incredible soldier, and I've never seen anything impact him like that. But, I also know I've never seen anything like getting the assignment for Ghost impact you the way it did."

"Is that what this is really about? You're concerned about me?"

"Yes. You're really good at hiding things, Captain. That's the whole reason I haven't already figured it out, but I know something about Ghost upset you the second you saw the assignment." Price sighs heavily and sinks back into his office chair. He will never admit it to her, but he missed having these chess matches with Laswell. She was the only one since his lieutenant that could see right through him and play mind games to keep him on his toes. But he never liked losing to the lieutenant, and he certainly hates losing to Laswell even more.

"Want to tell me what that's about?" Laswell presses at Price's continuing silence.

"What what's about?"

"Why did the mission assignment to capture or kill Ghost upset you so badly?" Price frowns at her, hoping his glare alone would dissuade her from pressing the matter. She doesn't relent, her stare unchanging and solid.

"I already told you. I don't want my task force to become another damn statistic."

"It's more personal than that."

"Does it have to be?" Price bites back, and his sudden aggression gives Laswell pause. She leans back and crosses her arms over her chest, frowning in thought as she stares across at her friend. His eyes give nothing away this time, and she knows he's consciously hiding everything he can from her. Damn mind games with a damn elite task force captain.

"I would believe so, given you've never had such a reaction to any other mission."

"Tell me, Kate, have you ever led a team of young men to what very well could be their death?" Laswell purses her lips, letting the action alone be her response.

"Didn't think so. Every other team assigned to Capture or Kill Ghost has become a fucking statistic. I have a perfect track record, and I'm not about to lose my men to some fucking urban legend." Laswell's eyes widen the slightest bit at Price's outburst. She hesitates, but the flash of something more gave her the hook she was looking for.

"Almost perfect."

"Beg pardon?" Price's voice lowers almost to a growl, but Laswell remains steadfast in her decision to pry even further.

"You lost your lieutenant several years ago, on mission, Price. That means you don't have a perfect record." Price scowls at her, turning his chair to face away from her.

"Don't remind me. That mission was my biggest failure. I owe everything to him to not lose another one of my men by being boneheaded. That mission was a trap, just like this one." Laswell's cold exterior drops at Price's rambling. She didn't know Price during the time of his lieutenant, and only met him a year or so afterwards. She never truly understood what that one casualty meant to him. That is, until just now.

"You don't know that this is a trap."

"I do, Laswell, that's the fucking problem. Ghost is a man beyond fact, a myth, an urban legend. I mean look what the fucker did to my new sergeant after just one encounter! How can I rest easy knowing I'm sending these two to their deaths?" Laswell sighs and focuses on gathering up her things.

"I'm just concerned about you, John. You've never acted like this in all the years I've known you. I'm scared for you and the boys, but there's nothing either of us can do about it. You have your orders and I have mine. Just don't let the stories get to you. Ghosts are only scary when you believe in them." And with that, Laswell quietly sees herself out of his office, leaving a fuming Price trying everything to push back the burning sensation of tears.

[sleepyowlwrites]

hello, since you oferred advice to the other anon can I get some words of wisdom too? you don't have to, I understand it can be a lot to ask. or maybe just a ear to listen? idk I'mhaving mixed emotions right now because somet things made me realize that even though I like writing, it's only gonna be ever for myself. which isn't a bad thing but I wanted to one day publish something but I find out now that writing is really hard and I don't have the discipline or even much interest it studying how to do it "right" like all the technicalities and stuff. so really I just like the finished product and how it "looks" in my brain more. I do like trying to figure out how to make a story make sense and all the behind the scenes stuff, but I'm rarely able to get to that stage due to being tired and unable to focus/ discipine myself to work.

I was wondering if there was something I could do about it? I mean I guess I need to accept that now when I write it's just gonna be as a hobby and for myself. though, similar to the other anon, I would like to share my writing, I mean I think we all want to share something we make at some point. but I probably have to give up wanting to make any kind of career or even part time thing from writing. I'm just not built for it I guess.

it's hard to accept. I tried developing templates for myself to follow to make it easier but I failed. I've tried many tips and suggestions and advice to write better but I just can't seem to grasp the craft. even reading doesn't help me.

I've thought about writing poetry instead, like you. but even though I like reading it I don't really like writing it much. I prefer to have characterts and drama, typical story stuff. but I struggle when it comes to putting everything together and actually crafting/building the story rather than just tell it.

sorry this got too long, I'm not really sure what I was trying to say, just need to go on a rant. I'm sorry if this was rude of me. thanks for reading if you do and I always like your responses so that's why I reached out, but let me know if I shouldn't do it like this

Had to wait until I got home from work.

So it looks like you understand your situation pretty well, actually, which is great to see.

Writing doesn't have to be a full time thing for you to go the published route. We have several published authors on here who have other jobs! You don't need to devote your whole career to it. It's fine for it to be a hobby and for it to be a hobby that you'd like to pursue a final result in.

If writing is something you enjoy, keep doing it, and if you'd like to progress, you can do it. (You can probably do it. Not everything is achievable for everyone. I will never be able to do advanced math, no matter how hard I try. My brain can't process it. But from what you're saying, your braincan process writing.)

You already know stuff you like or dislike, right? You know the story, just not how to tell it? Here are a few things that have worked for me and my discombobulated brain.

1. Bullet point lists. Just listing off major plot beats in bullet points. It's not an outline, it's not a plan, it's just a list of stuff that happens.

2. Rubber ducking. I pick somebody from something I've watched recently - for a whole there it was Keanu Reeves - and I explain my story to them multiple times so I understand myself how it works. Or not.

3. Draw a map. Not just a land map, but a map of where the characters go and notes on where they're from and what they're doing in each place.

4. Ask games. I make up so much stuff for ask games and some of it even stays canon!

5. Don't try to fit yourself into one mold of one type of writer. Just write whatever. Write one wip or 17. Write short fiction. Write fanfiction. Write one paragraph stories. Write comics with stick figures or rambling prose that goes nowhere.

5. When you read, rewrite it in your head. Edit those books! Pull out a trope you notice and stick it in a story. (A trope is anything as general as "enemies to lovers" and as specific as "traumatized tall girl with a big sword.")

6. Actually rewrite scenes, from any media you like. Choose a new pov. Focus on a particular sense, like touch, or write it in future tense, or change the setting.

7. Write descriptive prose that's not a story. Write something that's only dialogue. Write journal entries. Switch it up.

And sweetheart, if you are unable to focus or enjoy this hobby that is usually a good time for you, I think think the hobby is the issue. There's something else going on in your brain and taking up the space and you don't have room to create.

For instance, I work retail, full-time, and it’s the holiday season, and I'm fatigued and stressed and not currently writing anything. But I was also not writing when it wasn't the holiday season. And I was too fatigued to create then, too. And it's probably because my depression is acting up.

This might not be the case for you. I can't know. But everybody learns differently, and if you're willing to try new ways of learning, you might find the one that works for you! I hope so. I hope that you sit down with your brain and parse through it, taking the time to figure out the style that suits you best.

But mostly I hope you understand that regardless of how your brain functions or doesn't, that you are amazing and trying, because you like this thing, and you don't want to give up on it. So good job. As long as it is a thing that you like, I hope you keep trying. Somewhere there is a method that speaks to you, some way that helps you find the dawn after the dark. I believe you can find it.

Keep going, love.

[teeth--thief]

If you keep getting repeat notifs of me following you, it’s because I unfollow and refollow you quite often. I like to keep your accounts at the top of my list to check up on them easier.

Anyway… happy post-Chernobyl day! I was wondering if you had any idea as to why Legasov didn’t recieve a medal? It seems like he was a very Soviet Soviet; he did what he was told, no? Not a hero like HBO says, so why not congratulated like many others? I honestly don’t know a lot about him… I know the falling of the Union destroyed his literal reality and metaphorical reality, and he attempted to advocate for reactor changes, but that doesn’t seem outspoken enough to be denied honor.

- R

EDIT: ARE YOU KIDDING ME, I THOUGHT I POSTED THIS BACK WHEN YOU SENT THIS ASK 😭 I'm so sorry, I don't know how this happened... and this is such a lacklustre response, too...!

Awwwe... I'm very glad to hear that you're enjoying my insane posts that much!!

I honestly have no good nor solid answer to your question, only speculatiory bits. I thought about it for waaaay too long now and looked things up and read and and... I still have no solid ideas. I really don't want to make shit up as I go or speculate way too much, so I'll keep this very short.

I think since the Politburo thought it was an issue caused by Kurchatov Institute, be in directly or indirectly, it was their duty to fix it - and that meant that the actions of anyone sent by them weren't seen exactly as heroic, more so as necessary. My understanding of the situation is this: he was well liked by the higher-ups, not particularly liked by his fellow scientists who, I suppose, found his whole safety shtick annoying because how dare he, a chemist, have a say in that matter.

I don't know how true this is, don't quote me on this one, but I read in numerous places (none of which were actual solid sources which is why I'm hesitant to recount this) that Gorbachev was actually going to give him a medal but removed him from the list last minute per Evgeny Velikhov's request. Either way, there was most definitely some bad blood between these two.