#still...couldve been absolutely amazing :(

[floralovebot]

i am once again thinking about the missed opportunities of a garth and jackson mentor/mentee brother in arms relationship

[bathroomtrapped]

ohmygod i literally just made an account on letterboxd bc i watched saw (2004) and loved it so much and ur interview was so inspiring to me and ive been on an absolute craze trying to reblog like every single saw post on tumblr and i somehow found your account what the heck?!!?!?! ur art is AMAZING and i absolutely love ur takes on saw as a franchise and its significance to the queer community. i hope to be as knowledgeable of this franchise as you are one day despite me only being a baby saw fan!!

i had a quick question; i found on the saw heritage post blog that they thought leigh/james/someone else confirmed that saw (2004) did not actually occur the day before 9/11 despite the phone given to them being set to that date. however, when i asked them if they knew where this source was from (bc im so curious!!! i want to know everything!!!!!!) but neither they nor i could find the actual source for that so i was wondering if maybe u knew??? just curious :3

regardless ty for taking the time to read this and dedicating so much time to this fandom!! i love that horror fans like you exist in a fandom that i previously thought would be weird and slightly disturbed film bros (i had a lot of incorrect preconceived notions about saw that have been quickly resolved i promise)

thank you!! im glad that people feel the same way about it as i do but even if people thought i was some crazy transexual making everyone else woke and pronouns, i wouldnt care. the story, especially lawrences but adams as well, really resonates with me as a trans person for so so many reasons, more than i listed in the interview. to me, i cant read his character without filling in the gaps with trans subtext. it not only explains but also enriches the personal experiences of these characters as well as their dynamics with each other. theyre both characters that are defined primarily by how theyre seen by other people, themselves, and eventually each other. the narrative is soooo focused on perception and masks and who u truly are, i find it hard to separate any kind of queer theory from that.

as for the 9/11 question thats such a dumbass pet peeve of mine. its one of the things that makes me shout UMMMM ACTUALLY at the top of my lungs. my blood pressure sours to inhuman levels when someone confidently says the movie takes place not just in 2001 but the day before 9/11. not because of some interview or confirmation from any of the crew because my knowledge of old fandom history is incredibly spotty. old sites and interviews r a mystery to me for the most part BUT! the reason it is for sure not before 9/11 is because during the flashback of pauls trap (during lawrences monologue about jigsaw) kerry tapp and sing are all at the scene with other officers and i believe its kerry who holds up an evidence bag thats labeled 2004. the scene takes place 5 months before the events of saw 1 so its not possible that it takes place 3 years before that. it just seemed like a funny (but insanely bold considering how 9/11 was only 3 years before) joke and easter egg for people to catch on to, not actual lore meant to be taken seriously.

if u want to look for the interview, i would honestly just listen to the commentary tracks bc it mightve been said there. i know in the one with leigh, james, and cary they discuss plot holes fans complained about, questions fans had online, the fanfic they read (briefly LOL). ive only seen that one (and once) but theres at least 2 other commentary tracks with different people that i havent gotten around to for fear of like. completing saw? idk i cant bring myself to watch all of the commentary tracks but theres a chance they discuss it there! i can only speculate on the reason, all i know is that saw 2004 takes place in 2004 based on actual evidence from the media itself

if u have any other questions let me know. i still have the original draft of the interview which had more questions and longer responses bc i couldve gone on for days abt the lore and saw queer theory and ill never shut up about it

[punk-o-ween]

oh. my god. my brain chemistry is completely altered from this movie WOW. spoilers for kpop demon hunters below cut, this is a review

tagging @scary-friend specifically since theyre the bestie that got me to watch <3 what would i actually do without you

first off before i review, i just wanna say THIS is what animated movies should be. i hate the fact that this was a netflix movie only. i can just imagine all the people that wouldve been so happy to see this in theatres on the big screen, especially in imax/dolby where you can hear the music and see the visuals so clearly and beautifully. thats the one thing i hate about our digital age is that a lot of the breathtakingly stunning movies are hid behind a subscription wall but all the lackluster movies are put into theatres and we wonder why ppl dont go to the movies anymore like before. 😭 kpop demon hunters was AMAZING and i wish i couldve seen this in theatres… now onto the actual review ^^

at first i wasnt going to watch this movie. i honestly thought it was just going to be the average movie that everyone was a fan of at the moment (im one of those petty ppl whos like “oh well its popular so i mean ehh idk if imma watch 😓” but this movie was SO MUCH MORE and it had such a beautiful message to it

i first wanna talk about the characters though and how each one of them was introduced because it definitely sets up the whole movie in general. i loved all of them! especially zoey, i relate with her a lot 😅 i also liked how the saja boys in their boy band state were designed because they looked EXACTLY like those usual kpop boy bands you see where theyre all bright and colourful and i liked that detail. also can we make a bobby fan club bc i love him 💔💔 plus… ill hear yall out on literally everyone yall r simping for. idk the fandom but im LISTENING. my bi panic was all over the place LOL

secondly i just wanna say the music was BEAUTIFUL, especially the one rumi and jinu sang together when they met up towards the middle of the movie where rumi was talking about how she finds her voice when she’s with him. absolute FUCKING cinema witnessed in front of my big brown eyes i felt like i was seeing light LMAOO !!! you KNOW a movie is gonna be a fucking banger when they make their OWN soundtrack and not have too many bigger/huge artists just come together to make one like many other animated movies do. like yeah we got twice (MY OG POOKIES) but thats like the only people ive seen so like… POINT STILL STANDS. takedown? BANGER. golden? BANGER. how its done? BANGER AFTER BANGER AFTER BANGER /ref . everyone who worked on musical compositions n lyrics n melodies n ofc the people who actually sung them all should get like 50 grammys each deadass

thirdly idk what it is about cultural magical movies but im absolutely sat for everyone they come out with. this movie reminded me of turning red in the best way possible, both movies show that once you accept who you are and when you stop hiding your true self, you’ll be happier in the end with people who actually love you and care for you because of who YOU are, not how you made urself out to be and i love that. i enjoyed learning a bit more about korean culture while watching this movie and im ngl it makes me wanna pick up a book to learn the language (knowing id flop LMFAO) but whatever it was just BEAUTIFUL i loved the theme and messages from how magical and cultural everything was

im ngl though, i feel like this movie couldve did better with cleaning up the story because for a moment i was a bit overstimulated like WOAH the movie just started i barely know abt these demons yet and we get hit with “OKAY WELL RUMI IS ONE!!!” LIKE HUH 😨!!!! but i feel like that was the only problem i had with the whole movie, the rest was excellent and honestly i would watch this again! i also wish this movie was a series rather than a movie. i feel like so much more couldve gotten explained thru seasons and i wouldve loved for this to be like the new miraculous ladybug where they get into some shenanigans and fight off baddies. love those kinda shows idc idc 🙏 and i also absolutely wish this movie was around back in like 2018-2020 when a lot of movies like this were coming out and when kpop was literally at its peak due to bts and blackpink (who i was a BIG fan of at the time) and i wouldve been SO insane for this movie if it came out back then but i digress. 😅

overall id give this movie a 9.5/10 and as i said in the beginning i absolutely wish this movie came out in theatres so i couldve seen it on the silver screen instead of on my sticky slimy finger ridden apple pencil damaged blurry ahh ipad (LMFAO) but whateves that was just overall a gorgeous gorgeous film and i highly recommend watching it 🫶🫶

[cadaverousdecay]

if that last ask was about having unreciprocated feelings for your best friend, the answer is you move on very very slowly

i absolutely totally fell for my best friend and roommate oops. i was too afraid to actually say anything (i had other shit going on too plus not wanting to ruin the friendship as it was) and they eventually found someone who is perfect for them. i had to let the feelings start to fade after that and its hard, it definitely stings when they mention something about their new partner that i had wished i couldve been. sometimes the feelings are there stronger than ever and sometimes they dissipate for long enough to see that at the core of it all is still an amazing friendship with someone i love and that loves me back, platonic love is beautiful too. its best to focus on that but ik its easier said than done, thats why its so slow and nonlinear, but eventually it gets a little easier. dont break off a great friend for feelings that can fade over time, you can still tell your friend every mundane thing. thats your friend and they still love you even if its not also in a romantic way

if they meant moving on from a friendship breakup, i personally love bitching about it, bitching and complaining, its sooooooo fun :)

nice :3

[pisuteru]

as much as i am a d1 glazer of kp and could spend hours talking about how amazing and wonderful it is i could also spend forever talking about how BUNS💔 it is and how i wish there were things they changed.

actually, out of curiosity i watched that youtube summary thingy on why kp wasnt good and i thought i wouldnt agree with it (because most of the time people have stupid reasons for saying they dont like it. which like what you like, hate what you hate, im still gonna say something though) but i actually… kind of agreed with most of their points. its all stuff i have complained about with friends before i think i just hate hearing it from someone else (only i can criticize kinnporsche, haha!!!!!)

that being said, one of the things i wish changed was the amount of… dumb humor. dont get me wrong!! i love the attempts at being funny in the show, but i do still wish they kept the vibe of the trailers. to me, the amount of “silly” moments kind of weigh down the impact of the serious moments and take up a majority of the run time, which is where i agreed with the video. the main plot does seem kind of rushed in the last few episodes with shock after shock and i feel like this couldve been spread around a bit if they toned down the comedy aspect of the show.

one of the examples in the video that i absolutely agree with is the scene after porsche crawls across the floor as punishment and hes in the bathroom remembering what happened, which is one of my favorite scenes, but its quickly ruined by shitty comedy in the form of pete misunderstanding what porsche meant and believing he was referring to the punishment where he had to crawl across the floor, and not kinn more or less assaulting him. not only does this make what porsche went through seem less serious than what it really is, it stupefied petes character and was in all just… not that funny?

i get how this is more of a daemi issue rather than boc, the novel also had a lot of funny scenes and it was more like a dark comedy rather than a mafia love story, or whatever (it was also written, imo, horribly). but boc already took quite a bit of creative liberties and i feel like they couldve cut down the amount of silly scenes and replaced them with scenes that not only move the show along, but are more interesting to watch and take the characters seriously.

[vanikey]

im having Thoughts abt my living situation (past, present, and future) and im gonna ramble abt it on tumblr bc this blog is my diary

ive Officially lived on my own since april 2023 and i love it so much !!!!!! (tho if rent goes up any more and my job continues to have shit pay i may not get to anymore but anywayssss...) growing up i always wanted to live on my own but as i aged i grew fearful i wouldnt be able to bc of lack of independence emotionally, physically, and financially but i did it and i was worried id end up hating it or be lonely but no it fucks severely

that being said i loved living in my childhood home but couldve done with less constant people time LOL (or just more freedom ig) and then in college i lived with friends the whole time and that was a bit rocky for a while but the last few years (in the attic apartment) were amazing and i was sad to leave but at the same time i knew i had to if i wanted to eventually get my own place and i also had some fears abt my roommate (he hates living alone absolutely hates it and i loved living with him and hes said repeatedly he loved living with me but a part of me always wonders if thats bc it was me or if anyone wouldve done? like any friend/person that would spend time with him idk) (if my friend is reading this no youre not) (and it worked out anyway bc he moved states like a year or so after we stopped living together so i wouldve had to leave the attic apartment anyway lol) then i lived with my parents again and eventually found a job i lowkey hate but am usually neutral abt and got my own place and yeah!!

the Thing is one of my sisters and i always talked abt our dream houses and one day she merged it into us living together and also me helping her whenever she decides to have a kid (i offered to if we would be living together)(despite me not being comfortable with kids really idk i have 6 nieces/nephews aged 8 and under but i still dont know how to interact with them and am scared of babies and wont even hold them if theyre less than 6 months and even then it makes me so nervous) ANYWAYS i promised her id help her (even if its just like cleaning around the house or stuff like that) and maybe even try with baby/kid stuff bc shes planning on being a single mom

the thing is i knew she was being 100% serious and i do mean what i said but i also dont think i really Realized and also i may have been thinking hypothetically/jokingly kinda? without realizing? that that could be my actual future?? and shes potentially looking at getting a house rn and i wouldnt be moving into it anytime soon but she was asking me if id like to one day and is asking me abt stuff and it hit me like Oh Shit and i also realized her proposed deadline for starting to have her own kids is coming up in the next like 2-ish years (shes in her mid thirties) and im like. i actually dont want any of that lol

like i Just got out on my own? and id like to remain that way for a long time if possible? potentially forever?? and thinking on it if i ever got a house of my own i imagine itd be smaller and stuff and like the places we've talked abt id have my own space for sure like basically a mini apartment/basement scenario but thinking on it now i dont think thats good enough for me? bc someone will still be there living with me even if it is like upstairs or whatever and will be wanting to spend time with me that i may not want to be sharing (this was the first 18 years of my life lol) and not only that but there will be at least one if not two kids and ive never lived with anyone younger than me for an extended period of time and ahhhhhh

idk just having realizations ig and idk if theyll change or if I'll have to break her heart or if I'll have to put up with living with ppl again idkkkk

[petruchio]

but also. 2 weeks out, are you feeling any differently about ttpd??

honestly… not really! like as in i have not really changed my mind, i still think it’s a solid meh, there’s some absolute bangers on there (icdiwabh, guilty as sin?, but daddy i love him are all still stand out tracks to me.) and some genuinely heart wrenching ballads (loml, peter, and the black dog are my personal favs) but i still think overall it could’ve been GREAT with a bit more editing, a bit more polishing and more inspired production, and a bit less obsessive idiom usage/misguided attempts at incorporating academia (like… the metaphors she uses in the albatross are just kind of uninspired imo, like i love rime of the ancient mariner and the albatross as a metaphor is so rich and instead she just jammed a bunch of random “academic” references in there. i would’ve preferred if she’d stuck to coleridge bc it would’ve slapped, imagine if we’d had a legit good song a la hozier incorporating stuff like “water water everywhere” or references to cross bows or something. it could’ve been COOL) (similarly i actually really like down bad but the central metaphor feels so 80% done. like the spaceship metaphor in the verses is amazing — but what does that have to do with the gym or teenage petulance? it sounds like two songs jammed together — or a song that had a cool idea but they didn’t work on it enough to tie it all together (my same beef with orod’s vampire half baked metaphor. like if you’re doing a bit, DO IT! commit!! to the bit!!!!!)

so yeah to answer the question no not really. i still feel pretty much the same as i did before. it’s bloated and messy and unpolished and that’s not a good thing. i still like several tracks and believe me ive been BUMPING the ones i do, but im not going to sit here and act like it’s her best work (or even close to it) and i just wish it had been more cohesive and edited. its fine. but it couldve been AWESOME.

[rosewoodconch]

RWCH Readathon 2024: Day 2

Undercover Princess - Chapter 5

So I really don't like this chapter. Like it might be my least favourite in all the books.

But we're going to try to be positive!

"Chaos and anarchy in human form" is a fun descriptor

80's teen heart throb made me blush at 14, I think its a really good descriptor of her aesthetic

I really like Ellie's attitude for most of the chapter, even if she does take it too far. I think it shows that reputation we heard about, her sneaking out to concerts and having arguments

The bi panic is so relatable and i love lottie for that.

Now, the argument

its stupid

its so stupid

ellie is so genuinely impressed with lotties side of the room

and lottie is just... horrible

I get that ellie isnt her perfect dream roommate, but cmon Lottie youre not that stupid to expect everyone to revolve around you

maybe she would benefit from a touch more anxiety in this scene (/lh)

Also it's meant to be like what mid 2010s? CDs are cool at that point. they still are cool. god just because someone hasnt unpacked immedaitely doesnt mean theyre lazy

alternatively, I dont mind Lottie getting angry and upset about mr truffles. that is so incredibly valid and Ellie had taken it to far so yeah i completely get being really upset and having her whole "I'm not a rich kid so i cant just magically fix everything" moment

However, I always see people only critisicing Ellie. so im here to change that too.

Lottie was being so rude and harsh and I genuinely get really angry every time i read it.

Like this girl has been there maybe 30 minutes, she was tired and passed out napping

gets woken up rudely by her roommate who seems to think the world must fit her perfect expectations, while Ellie is sleep deprived and grumpy

she tries to be so polite by introducing herself, if with a little sarcasm, but is genuinely impressed and compliments Lottie.

THEN Lottie starts being all rude and condescening and Its not like tha fairies are going to do it

I think if my roommate or anyone really said that to me I would react so much worse than Ellie did. so yes. shes wrong for what she did to mr truffles. completely.

But oh my god Lottie get a tiny grip please im begging

then they magically make up

im tired

the book so far is amazing and i dont know if its just my own experiences making me absolutely hate this scene but their first meeting couldve been written so so so much better imo

I'm gonna stop now or I'll rant for forever.

[hibiscussoupbowl]

Some characters in teen wolf are very 50 50 for me and some of those characters are malia, kira, allison, and derek. Most of them are females and that is bc the writers put all of their best into lydia.

Kira is one of the main characters that i dont like and that is bc how she was introduced was very weird. Eavesdropping on a convo and then just being like 'yeah those dreams mean ur gonna die :D' like sorry bro that is NOT the way to go if ur trying to make friends. I think the ppl who screwed her over the most was the writers bc i feel like if she was just a character on her own she wouldve been fine but it felt like she was there purely for scott. I get it, tv shows need romance most of the time but scott is never single ever. Like maybe s3a?? And even then its still sorta allison. Kiras scenes with malia were so good and i thought when they were dancing in the first ep of s4 i was like i think this would be a good dynamic. And in s5 when she has to capture the electricity or whatevrr malias there and shes giving her encouragement and i thought that was awesome. I feel like bc they made her there just bc of scott it made me iffy abt her character. Shes a kitsune who has lightning powers u couldnt give her some scenes were she wasnt with scott or doing stuff by herself??

Allison is another case like this. She has such good moments when its just her archery and doing stuff by herself or with lydia. S3a shes being herself and shes finding stuff out and still having to deal with ppl sorta dustrusting her bc she was an antagonist at the end of s2 and i think its annoying that they put isaac there as a love interest. Isaac and allison as separate characters or a dynamic?? Amazing. Awesome. But making them so sexual tension wasnt fun bc a. Allison was mainly using isaac as a rebound and b. when she was dying she was just all like scott its been you all along and that fine first love but to isaac??? That shit is painful af like imagine ur being kinda with a girl and then u think ok finally someone loves me finally someone is in the same boat of ppl being distrusting but then she dies and not even a glance? Idk just felt bad. Allison was so close bc when she was on her own she had such good scenes and i wish she had more archery scenes and ones with lydia. It was also like the parallel u couldve gotten with isaac and allison fighting together or smt???? Like with the end of s2 with allison shooting down all of the wherewolves and then s3b and shes fighting WITH them???? Like bro wasted potential.

Malia is just a character a 50 50 chaarcter cuz there is some questionable things she does but shes pretty cool with the whole 8 years coyote thing and with being blunt but idk i think i just am 50 50 on her lol

Lydia is the absolute best bc omfg she had some dating but overall she mostly figured stuff out herself and she had good sideplots with being a banshee and i thought her ajd parrish havibg that weird... smt was not needed but i did like the aspect of before she found out abt her sonar scream she needed to learn how to fight and i think it woldve been cool if they were not freaking tension filled. She was a strong character and they def put everything into her bc holy crap. Idk to me shes a big 10/10 character.

Derek is just freaking annoying man. Like sleeping with the enemy so many times? And he also never has smt besides a family problem or smt abt the person hes sleeping with. I was also kinda annoyed abt how isaac leaving after derek throws the glass never gets resolved. I feel like he also doesnt grow as a character much. Like two seasons hes like my sister died my uncle did it and family fire and my ex is the one who caused most of this and then s3 and its i slept with the enemy and my sisters back somehow after the family fire that my other ex caused and then s4 is braedens season and she was again so cool as a character on her OWN nd then the inly interesting thing was that he needed to learn how to use a gun. And then s5 he was barely there and s6 he was barely there so he didnt have growth i feel like. Not to say he wasnt hella funny at times

They all had good moments though like malias plot abt her mother was interesting (even if i couldnt really follow along) and kiras whole skinwalker thing which i was disapointed abt bc i wanted her to stay for s6.

They also make ALL the female characters be romantic with scott of least ONCE. Lydia kissed him, allison, kira, malia (which i thought was weird that they just, got rid of that in the movie and developed it in like 20 episodes and was rushed as hell) and then allison again. Please give me a character that isnt somehow drawn to scott i beg

[kitorin]

i read your fanfic letters to my favourite author and i must say, it was so good i- ifhndaoi. i really liked the way i was atually surprised with the revelation in the end, i was so sure it would be chigiri but was pleasantly surprised to see it was actually rin, i can totes see him do tht honestly, hes the type to care but not really show/know how to show it, and it sure is cute, i speculated it couldnt be isagi for the sole factor of luck and - since he is my childhood best friend im p sure id know his handwriting, and hed be more upfront with needing to talk and all that since we're already friends - the others were also p obvious but i did thik for a second it couldve been yukki. it got me vv hooked ww anyway ill stop here bc it kinda got too long oopsies so sorry anw hope ya have a good day, drink lots of water and take breaks when needed

Hiii !! Sorry for leaving this in my inbox for a while I wanted to answer it when I got home + I had dinner.

"i read your fanfic letters to my favourite author and i must say, it was so good i- ifhndaoi. i really liked the way i was atually surprised with the revelation in the end" First off, thank you so much ! I'm so glad to here that I managed to execute it properly :) I was really uncertain about it not doing well but the feedback on it made me happy beyond words. I was a bit worried about making it too obvious (might've overthought the discussion scene a bit too much :>).

"i can totes see him do tht honestly, hes the type to care but not really show/know how to show it, and it sure is cute" ABSOLUTELY !! Communication definitely isn't his strong point (and that's OK I still love him regardless). I love the idea of him using other ways to express himself instead of using words (I have yet to get a love letter I WANT ONE SO BAD). Just the thought of the little messages got me all excited.

"it got me vv hooked ww anyway ill stop here bc it kinda got too long oopsies so sorry anw hope ya have a good day, drink lots of water and take breaks when needed" Once again, thank you so much anon ! Please don't apologise for anything, I loved reading your ask <3 I hope you have an amazing day / evening and make sure to take care of yourself too !

[softness-and-shattering]

I didnt realise the finale was so many hours and hours.

Went for mind flayer, was immediately sad, reloaded, Orpheus says "and just as I am free" and I was sad *again* but I decided my tav and I are a bit vain and selfish and Orpheus could take the illithid burden so we could stay a tiefling prettyboy. I just dont see a good ending for my guy as an illithid, whereas Orpheus has been a quest objective and tavs been my avatar for 170ish hours.

Then I get to the house of allies. Which is so funny. My owlbear cub has been a cub for months in game, was a cub when I left camp and is suddenly a full grown ownbear. Speaking of camp, Jaheira and Halsin both showed up as allies (I dont have an option to call them though?), which begs the question, where are Wyll and Shadowheart, did they sleep in on the big day? Maybe theyre minding Scratch. Its maybe a little silly that you cant have everyone together for the final confrontation.

A really inreresting thing happened after I got the last netherstone that Ive never seen anyone mention before. My last stone was Gortash, i went straight to long rest after and realised oh this is the barn camp. I dont want my final long rest to be here I want the inn! So I did partial rest, teleported to Baldurs Gate, and immediately got a cutscene and a fight of random civilians changing into mindflayers. I was ok, did the final long rest. Got the cranium rats with cloudkill which was amazing, they all dashed right into it.

Re the morphic pool revelation, that is so freaking cool. Whos the enemy, oh its this god The Absolute. Psych its 3 people controlling the elder brain. Psych the elderbrain/Netherbrain was doing a long con and She *was* the true villain all along! My only wish is for a little more foreshadowing, because one of my issues witgmh Act 3 has been that the chosen are these interesting charismatic villains and then once I beat them, oh its just the brain, whatever, the brain is a puppet. And I guess it has been known that the brain itself is dangerous, but only in abstract, not in personality, not in a compelling way. Its taken me months to get this far partly because ive been like, well once ive defeated the chosen the game becomes just sweeping up the remains. I was wrong and Im glad for it, I just wish there had been more excitement about getting to face the brain rather thqn it feeling inevitable.(i also broke into house of hope and fauled my original rolls to save gale so I dont have a plot reason to want the crown. I have no idea what options ill have at the end now).

And it was weird the emperor got so mad about freeing orpheus like "youve given me no chocie but to join the absolute". My dude you couldve stuck around, I didnt mistrust you but I needed to save Orpheus for Laezels sake. Youre the one walking out on the alliance, enjoy your slavery or whatever?? After everything youre *choosing* to join the absolute? After everything??? My guy. I will say its an interesting take on not meeting your heroes, and then hearing randoms swear on balduran.

Made it to the brain stem, and as im at the bottom healing up and coating weapons and things, my game crashes. Been playing for hours so i decided that was a good a sign as any and Im stopping for the day.

Im so nervous to finish!!! I keep checking my conpanions for extra dialogue and I really appreciate the changes. The only slight break to immersion is that you cant have a proper group huddle about becoming an illithid cause they just have one line. Really enjoying astarions flippancy mixed with seriousness of "well we've made is this far havent we. We have to make it now", and that I can ask Karlach if theres time for a final kiss. Laezel is very stoic "i am the blade of my people" ok ok ok. Its also funny that she still has the lines when yiu move her "by vlaakiths will" like uh babe is that a habit now? You ok?

Hqving q good time. Excited and trepidatious of whats to come. Glad Arabella isnt joining the combat.

[maniispluto]

everytime i think abt the girl i genuinely thought was my soulmate and my heart CRUSHES. bc it was so real and raw and i didn’t believe in soulmates until her bc there were just so many crazy coincidences throughout our lives and there still are. like we couldve been the best love story if only she wasnt evil and conniving. like i was so deeply inlove and infatuated with this girl like you wouldve thought she was all i had. and to an extent she was but that was by choice. i had friends and family and i distanced from them FOR HER. and i convinced myself it was healthy?? like oh god. im kinda rambling but she has been on my mind SO HEAVY and i literally dont know why bc ive been fine for months. ive been absolutely amazing even, so why now?

[kaiserkisser]

you 🫵 my dear i heard you were quite upset about your marks and that it soiled your day recently (sickness is gettingnto me i sincerely apologize for not remembering the date💀) but i came here to remind you around(?) dinnertime when youll see it that you are GENUINELY the smartest person i know. and im like rank 11 in my class idk i dont actually check point is IM QUALIFIED TO SAY THIS OK! you worked so hard and ill say this time and time again but i truly know in my heart that there are some tests and some papers that are out to GET YOU, and you did everything in your capacity to get the highest marks you could. and its okay that you didnt get what you wanted!! you take what you did wrong and you learn from it, but you never. and i mean. never. skylia. NEVER again am i gonna hear that youre dumb or failing or something of that vein that indicates you didnt try because i know you did, gorgeous. and i know you did a damn good job doing it

academics are one of those things that you have to learn to be okay with falling in sometimes because it gives you wiggle room to improve your work. ive also seen that youre taking ORGANIC CHEM?????? bro i GRADUATE this year and i took organic chem and it broke me. ruined my life. you are a BEAST for even taking that and doing well in it?? honey youre already there. i sincerely wish your parents saw this but along with a lot of other parents with high expectations (mine included) its literally physically incapable for them to even have a little bit of grace surrounding this but. i digress. lia you are doing the best you can and you cant beat yourself up for this!!! i truly believe in you pretty girl youre gonna do amazing things and youre gonna grow and write better papers but youre doing everything you can with how stressed you are, you deserve a break, or atleast a breather. youre doing amazing hon i dont wanna hear you say otherwise ever again���🫵 i love you very much youre too smart to waste time thinking about what couldve gone better when it isnt in your control anymore

UH HELLO????? NOAH?????? HOLY SHIT YOU ACTUALLY TOOK THE TIME TO TYPE OUT ALL OF THAT HSKAJSHSJSJSN OH MY GOSH i was SO tempted to just let this stay in my inbox forever oh my god how are you so sweet and caring wtf i have literally reread this like ten times seems like everyone today is dead set on making me cry /vvpos

i was actually vv upset abt a few subjects coz thats like the lowest ever but like NO ome has gotten good marks so like its fine..... ill do better next time for sure :3 (oof dont apologise i hope youve been taking care of yourself :(((( ] OFC UR QUALIFIED EHEHE and youre absolutely right actually!!! its been unuversally acknowledged atp that the prelim/preboard exams are in all honesty way tougher than the actual boards so i kinda knew it was gonna be shitty but still ehhh comparatively i HAVE done okay! oh my gosh noahie 😭😭😭 okay okay mister ill try to never say anything like that again and if i think of it ill remember what you said and shoo the thoughts away 🙁🙁

you do have a point tho! im gonna like microanalyse everything i did wrong so i dont get stuff wrong next time :333 AND HELP SJSHSU actually we dont have a CHOICE :(((( we have ten compulsory subjects till 10th and in chem we have compulsory organic by default and im taking pcm after this so ill never get rid of organic :( so like rn we only have basics djshsh but its better than learning how to prepare compunds :((( gosh i agree so much and i love you SO much too holy shit thank you so SO much noah for taking the time to write all this it genuinely means SO MUCH to me it legit made me feel a 100 times better abt this 🙁🙁

[wilsonfanboy]

Guys I watched Phone Booth yesterday fully expecting to love it but oh my god this movie sucks so much ass and is so infuriating I couldn’t even finish it

The concept is absolutely amazing I was so excited bc idk how they could fuck that up but SOMEHOW THEY DID

everyone in the movie is just dumb as rocks and can’t figure out what’s going on despite LITERALLY BEING WITHIN EARSHOT OF THE GUY IN THE PHONE BOOTH AS HE’S SAYING OUT LOUD THAT THE DUDE ON THE LINE HAS A GUN POINTED AT HIM

NOT ONLY THAT, BUT PEOPLE SOMEHOW THINK HE WAS THE ONE WHO SHOT THE GUY LITERALLY ASSAULTING HIM WHEN 1. HE WAS SHOT IN THE BACK WHILE FACING THE GUY SO THATS PHYSICALLY IMPOSSIBLE, PLUS THERE WAS NO WEAPON AND 2. HE WOULDVE BEEN WITHIN HIS RIGHTS TO DO SO (in America) BECAUSE HE WAS LITERALLY ASSAULTING HIM AND ATTEMPTING TO KILL HIM????

NOT ONLY THAT BUT IT PAINTS THE HOOKERS OUT IN THE MOVIE TO BE SOME “EVIL EMOTIONAL SLUTS WHO ARE LYING ABOUT THE GUY IN THE PHONE BOOTH” WHEN LIKE. IDK IF ITS JUST BC THE MOVIE WAS MADE IN 2003 BUT PEOPLE HAVE MORE COMMON SENSE THAN THAT LIKE WHAT THE FUCK MAN

PLUS, THE GUY ON THE LINE WAS DUMB AS SHIT TOO BC HE WAS CONSTANTLY TELLING THE GUY IN THE BOOTH TO RESPECT PEOPLE WHILE SIMULTANEOUSLY FORCING HIM TO BE DISRESPECTFUL

THAT PIZZA GUY WAS LITERALLY TOLD WHAT TO DO WITH THE PIZZA BY THE GUY IN THE BOOTH (GIVE IT TO HOMELESS PEOPLE, WHICH IS ACTUALLY A NICE THING TO DO) BUT HE STRAIGHT UP WOULDNT LEAVE HIM ALONE AND, WHILE THE BOOTH GUY WAS RUDE, THAT DOESNT MEAN HE SHOULD FUCKING DIE FOR IT

NOT ONLY THAT, BUT HE WAS LITERALLY DOING WHATEVER HE COULD TO GET THE GUY WHO WAS THREATENING TO HURT HIM FOR LAWFULLY USING A PHONE BOOTH TO GO AWAY, AND WAS LITERALLY BEGGING HIM TO LEAVE AND OFFERING HIM MONEY, BUT THEN THE GUY ON THE LINE WAS LIKE “erm…youre actually not being respectful enough to him to I’m still gonna shoot you”

MOTHERFUCKER HE WAS BREAKING IN THE GLASS WITH A BASEBALL BAT AND ASSAULTING HIM

I’m also not gonna touch on the cops stupidity because like. thats just normal like fuck cops

AND IM NOT SAYING THE GUY IN THE PHONE BOOTH IS A GOOD PERSON, HE’S CAPITALIST SCUM WHOS CHEATING ON HIS WIFE, BUT THE MOVIE COULDVE EXPANDED ON THAT MORE INSTEAD OF JUST MAKING EVERYONE FUCKIN STUPID LIKE CMON MAN

anyways that’s my review for phone booth 21 years late

3/10

[anosci]

(362-377 albums etc that I’ve listened to this year, copied from twitter) (now with art. [1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [9] [10] [11] [12] [13] [14] [15] [16] [17] [18] [19] [20] [21] [22] [23] [24] [25] [26])

names and thoughts below cut

362/ Patricia Taxxon - TECHDOG 3 (2023) jotting down thoughts as we go like t1 oh… lyrics. oh… beauty. t4 bringing hella beats t5!! glass! t6 groovin :') t7 oh cmon why are these so good t11 is an otherworldly finale. like god damn i love the grooves in here in particular!

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363/ heRobust - Vertebreaker (2017) yeah its hard but im still not used to herobust doing wob? "Heavy Meddle" scratches that beat itch a bit tho, with that back forth beat "Status Busted" would be my fav song if not for the. yknow. yeah.

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364/ Patricia Taxxon - TECHDOG 4 (2023) lush and melodic. drifts. feels freeing. t3 rough start but i think this would be astoundingly good zone out headphone music t4 headfog max. a fav. t6 boid :) another fav t8 bt-esque :O t10 is a MASSIVE ending holy sht

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365/ Persian Empire - Kaya EP (2017) crispy beats. rotary organs. vibes :)

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366/ Patricia Taxxon - TECHDOG 5 (2023) this one's the secret "scary times" release and its damn good at it. wall to wall dour. some specific thoughts: t2 sentinel :O t5 man. this is a weird and cool vibe (beat) t7 is a bad dream. intense. t9 a small light in the dark. standout.

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367/ Patricia Taxxon - TECHDOG 6 (2023) i regret to announce my opinion that i think these tracks are too long. i love these soundscapes but not for 10 minutes a piece. that said, favs: t6, t8, t10. t11 astounding. cinematic even. this couldve been the end i think.

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368/ Patricia Taxxon - TECHDOG 7 (2023) it's the "feel nothing" lp, but like. "depression state" nothing. it does a good job but i have mixed feelings about it. EXCEPT track 9 has such an insanely specific feel id describe as "child alone in a room and doesnt know why". respect.

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369/ Lila Tirando a Violeta & Sin Maldita - Accela (2023) has an insano in the braino soundscape(o) "Talking Trees" wouldve rearranged my dna if i heard it in 2012.

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370/ VA - WILDCHIP != WIN (2017) mix bag etc well…hm. wildchip doesnt really grab me as strongly i guess? idk. that said, "Throwback Days" holy shit that's smoov. love the way the FM wobs are incorporated here

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371/ Space Dimension Controller - Na Púcaí (2023) chill timbre tech no(?) good nighttime music "Multiples Of None" in particular is sticking with me

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372/ Lee Gamble - Models (2023) slowchill for chill day B) haunting more in timbre than tonality. sounds like ancient RNN generated vocals, some of this. cool effect "XIth c. Spray" prolly my fav here!

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373/ VA - Nanosweep 32 (2023) a nice lil bout of dance floor nano sweeping. "Insufficient all" has an interesting flow. not chill but not intense? "vapor trail" amalgam vibe

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374/ VA - Metal 5 (2017) eh. predisposition bias tho. enjoying the FM metal appearing in "Mechanical Wolf" "Running down the Hill" is my fav but absolutely not metal at all. "Hornet" is my fav that is also metal

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375/ Alva Noto - HYbr:ID II (2023) understood as soundtracks to sodium lights. "Elastic 1" hit good w/ those chord stabs "Elastic 2" hits harder. some sort of bubbling intensity. "Field 1" low key banger with that beat

--- November ---

376/ VA - SPC Echoes 2 (2017) mix bag etc. much love for the rez in "dazzling!" "bed bed" is funny bc i'd consider it a morning sunshine title. ig thats still bed! "aurora surrealis" funnest snes-pusher. "Alternate Timeline" amazing soundscape! overall fav

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[mourningwithmagicians]

j dont read it

here's how i feel right now: broken and sad and in bits and pieces

im going through depression. i am depressed. depressed stage of grief. no more anger. no more denial. so much depression.

i can't write to him anymore i have to write to myself

i cant face myself right now

im glad i have some peace. no distractions. full focus on how shattered i am and how i am barely getting by on thursday nights to look forward to and little shit like that. my social media is all a lie.

i have to believe in karma for HIM not trying to write it as YOU bc that is fucking me up to feel like im talking to HIM.

i want karma to be real for you bc that would mean that you would get all the best and tender and lovely things in life like YOU DESERVE. sorry i guess i cant not write to you another fucking thing i can't do right. it's bc i still love you and you own my soul forever i guess fuck

i am writing this at my absolute lowest. so low. i deserve it. i deserve the low. you are going to make an amazing father and husband and you are already an amazing brother and son and church member and employee you are literally. an. angel. amazing. perfect person. god bless you in every fucking way possible. god please grant you a long, healthy, safe, loving life. you have had so much hardship and please god just make it easy for him. he deserves it. please i hope you hear me. give him everything that is the best and sweetest and kindest and amazing. a beautiful sweet soul to match his exactly. the way mine didn't.

im not regretful, rather i have a lot of remorse for how i handled everything. i am regretful that you are out of my life. im regretful actually nevermind. remorse and regret. i feel regret that im a fucking piece of shit. sorry i ever subjected you to that. sorry i ever entered your life. sorr i ever fell in love with you. sorry that it hurts this bad. it hurts so bad for me. so badly that i cant think about anything other than you. and your warmth and your feel. and your love. sorry i fucked up everything. i did the worst fucking thing possible to us.

im not angry anymore. you risked what you couldve risked. your dad was sick. your mom was unhappy with me. you couldn't have risked much more i guess. you couldn't have done much more. sorry i wasn't accepting of that.

why did you have to be you. perfect. amazing. apparently not meant to be.

hey and i am so heartbroken/ can you give me anything bad ever? I will take all of the bad. please give it to me j. i miss saying your name. i miss telling you i love you? you know why. because i love you. so i miss saying it. i miss making you feel the way i feel about you.

i think what i was trying to say earlier is that i don't regret our break up for my time on this earth but when we go to heaven or compost into dirt and become nothing, it would've been nice to do that next to you. i guess i never think in the long term huh. i wanted to be with you without all of the logistics of being a human that got in our way. im a fucking idiot. i feel like i'll get the loneliness that's coming for me. i hope you get the best.

genuniely, the woman you end up with will be so lucky. solucky. you are the best lover. the best person. i miss my warm decembers with you. if only i was better. not a piece of shit that wrecked everything.

youve been through so much that you dont even deserve. i am sorry i am a monster. please know that this monster loved you with her whole heart. still does.

putting on my devil ears like the demonic horrible daughter person sister i am