#the problem is that mac doesn't care enough to get consent

[dennisboobs]

every day i have to hold my tongue when m-cd-nnis shippers start sounding like frat guys with the way they talk about dennis' Secret Feelings toward mac. hey man. i don't actually think you get it. i don't think you understand what's going on between them.

[slashingdisneypasta]

Poly!Frason x Reader || Headcanons

Topic: Just SFW headcanons for them- I may add a second part with all the angst stuff I can think of but not yet! ^^ This could be considered romantic or platonic, you choose. ^^

Warnings: This is mostly comedy XD A little mention of the men trynna eat your pet kitty cat tho. This whole thing is set in a time post FVSJ but Freddy has got his body back somehow.

First of all- You went and decided you wanted the wolf AND the hunter and I applaud you for it.

Second of all, I have no patience hahah. So we are skipping over 'how' in the world this happened- Just know it took a while to get them to cope with each others' existences but you've figured it out for the most part. I mean neither of them can help themselves every now and then, yeeting the other across the camp or bullshitting from the mouth but!- its an improvement XD

Boy these two know nothing about boundaries. You must be a saint. Jason will lose (what's left of) his mind, if you so much as spend a weekend back at your place in the city. Don't bother reupping your rent babe cuz a couple hours outta the camp is his limit. And Freddy disregards personal space and your comfort levels on a regular. They are his comfort levels, now. Be warned.

Jason has a new sense (A 7th, if you will. Cuz we all know his sixth is sniffing out horny behaviour) and these are the 'Y/N's leaving the safety of the cabin tingles'. He'll come a running when he feels them and catch you just with the flat of one foot not even yet touching the grassy ground but definitely looking guilty as can be, like... 'Oh... Oops?'.

Freddy loves it and will go out of his way to make it happen. Getting snacks you like and leaving them out just out of reach from you (As you're on the porch) so you have to inch out of bounds in order to retrieve them ("Mmmm, look at this delicious, freshly campfire cooked bowl of mac and cheese. Its too bad I don't actually want it myself! Such a shame it's going to go to waste... Oh? You want it this Y/N? No problem! I'll just leave it right... here, for ya!" // "I hate you.") or bursting in all panicked and saying quickly, that there's a bear! And we need to go now! Just for there to be no bear, of course, except for Jason, and Freddy's standing there with a video camera he stole from some campers.

"Jason! I didn't mean to- Really!- no- But- Really, it was Fre- Oof." *You cross your arms pouting as Jason plops you back down inside the cabin.*

He does not care for your excuses Y/N, just for the love of god and the sake of his anxiety- STAY INSIDE.

Now, if any of the campers were to find you, supposedly safe in the cabin... well, Jason is missing that sense. Its an unfortunate loophole. LUCKILY, though, Freddy is rarely far away. He knows in his mortal form he doesn't hold up much against groups of teenagers and so is in much the same situation as you, being vulnerable (Therefore its a better strategy for him to stick with you- tag team). But you two have some contingency plans for times like these when you're in danger, so don't you worry.

Like Booby Traps! You have a few of them in and around the cabin (Like the classics- foot nooses that end up with the poor soul hanging upside down *cough* where freddy finishes them off *cough*, bear traps *cough* Jason occasionally gets stuck in these but he just goes on walking around with it like its nothing. You have to ask him to stop so you can take it off gently for him *cough*, etc. I know nothing about booby traps sorry). And if those don't work, you pretend to be a hostage (A non-consenting one) to lead the soon-to-be victim into a false sense of security just long enough for Freddy to sneak in and get them from behind.

You get to introduce them to modern things! Cuz like, remember, both these men are old, okay? They are in their 70's. They still think apple is just a food.

You show them music when you can get your hands on a campers phone until it loses charge, movies on a little portable DVD player, and books (Yes, I think Jason can read. He was 11 when he died. He probably just needs practise now and to get back into the rhythm- then he'll improve fast ^^ I like to think he likes reading and writing! And is a stickler for grammar. Like, Freddy uses abbreviations and Jason gets so annoyed.). Also different sexualities and gender identifications! ("Like, for example, since Freddy likes women and men, then he may be bisexual or pansexual, depending on how important biological identity is to him. Or aromantic, too! That means you don't feel romantic attraction. And Jason- since you don't want anything to do with sex- you might be Asexual! Only if you want to identify though, you can go without a label too if you want- " // Calm down Y/N neither of them really care. Jason is just Jason and Freddy is just slutty)

OODIES FOR ALL.

You also discuss games... and of course Dead By Daylight comes up... And... "Oh, its super cool! It has a whole buncha really cool original killers, but also quite a few well-known Horror Villains and Slashers! Like Bubba and Michael! And... and... " *Slowly you realise Jason isn't in it... and get awkward... and quiet. Slamming your mouth shut*

Freddy: "Am I in it??"

You: Ow- oh, uh- in, in a manner of speaking...

You give them both a 'Which Divergent Faction Do You Belong In?' quiz and Freddy thinks he's a Dauntless but he's a Candor XD Jason is Dauntless. Also, of course, Hogwarts Houses.

I can imagine them starting a collection of Pop Funkos if they could- its too cute and I'm gonna die with this headcanon.

I feel like... no matter how 'sweet' we tend as a fandom to characterise Jason... if you got a pet... both he and Freddy would be vying to eat the thing. Come on! You're in the middle of a forest living off junk food left behind by campers, and leaves- and its not camping season. Hand over the cat, its eat time, nom nom.

I feel that this goes without saying, but Jason is the mature one.

You and Freddy make up games to pass the time.

When you're sad and don't care to be cheered up, Jason's got it. He'll sit for hours with you in his lap, your head on his chest until you feel better or you fall asleep.

You wash up in the lake and Jason plays bodyguard for you ^^