#there'll be peace when you are done; sam mccoy | young verse

[unscrxpted]

Sam laughed a little when she messed up his hair, reaching up to fix it. It had been a long time since anyone had done that. Since anyone seemed to care about him. It was nice.

He nervously picked at his cuticles. He almost didn't want to leave. Having someone care... he almost didn't mind that it was likely a djinn's trick. Almost.

"When's Mr. McCoy supposed to be home?"

changingthelegacy​:

Sam took a deep breath, chuckling. “Anytime. Really, Hannah. Anytime.” He looked up at Carol and shrugged. “I did what Dean used to do for me. I was right here, so…” He smiled. “Don’t worry, Mrs. McCoy. I’ll teach you what I know.”

Hannah smiles softly, taking another bite of the sandwich Sam had gotten her. Carol sighs softly and ruffles Sam’s hair affectionately as she returns to her work, though she glances back at him.

She doesn’t want him to leave. Doesn’t want him to go back there, to what he was doing before they met him. She wants him to be safe and cared for. And he’s still so stubborn.

She knows she can’t force him. But she wants him to stay. And she knows the kids and Leonard do, too.

[unscrxpted]

"I was already missin' one kid," Bones' voice is full of vitriol. "What was I thinkin' bringin' you into the mix? Like you could've replaced her. I made a damn mistake." Carol looks up and grits her teeth as she looks to her son. "We weren't prepared to have you in the household, and we were stupid enough to try anyways, it was our mistake, clearly."

Sam lifted his chin, gritting his teeth, barely fighting back the tears. Yeah. Yeah, that sounded about right. It was only a matter of time before they came to the conclusion he had so long ago. He never should've let himself believe...

"Clearly," he said flatly in response, going silent, masking his pain as best he could. He was a Winchester, after all.

[unscrxpted]

Sam nodded and smiled. "Good. You're doing good. You're safe." He squeezed her hand back. "You're okay. You're okay." He kept with the exaggerated breathing, maintaining as much eye contact as he could.

SAM THE HERO​:

Sam held out his hand. “Hey. I’m here. You’re home. I promise you. Okay? I need you to breathe.” He exaggerated his slow breathing, trying to show her. He hoped it would help. “Squeeze my hand, Hannah. Ground yourself.”

Hannah reaches out and squeezes his hand, sniffling and trying to follow his lead on breathing. She whimpers a bit, closing her eyes and curling up tighter, still gripping his hand.

[unscrxpted]

"Look, I don't even know," Sam said. "I'm just rolling with the punches. It's not every day I have a conversation with Bones McCoy, Jim Kirk, and Spock."

He took a deep breath and leaned against the wall. "Djinn trap their victims in an alternate reality, basically a person pocket dimension, that's based around the victim's deepest desire. They feed on the happiness. Or, well, the chemicals in the brain that get released when a human is happy." He shrugged. "My deepest desire... well... it's not Star Trek."

There was another long pause. He looked down at his feet. "It's my family. I never got to know my mom. She was killed when I was a baby. Murdered by a demon. Four years ago, when I was twelve, my dad was killed by the same demon after tracking it down." He cleared his throat. "My brother..."

changingthelegacy​:

Sam nodded and chuckled dryly. “Yeah. You keep on saying that. When you live your whole life chasing creatures that can bend reality, it isn’t exactly easy to just accept that you’ve actually dropped into another universe and aren’t being played so you can be dinner.”

“And just how in the hell do you expect us to ‘prove’ this to you? There’s nothing we can show you, apparently, 1999-but-just-rolling-with-everything,” Bones rolls his eyes sarcastically.

“Wait. Back up.” Rebecca looks at him. “You mentioned ‘the djinn getting it wrong’ earlier. What’s up with that, exactly? I literally can’t even begin to guess what the lore for them is like where you’re from.”

[unscrxpted]

Sam took a deep breath, chuckling. "Anytime. Really, Hannah. Anytime." He looked up at Carol and shrugged. "I did what Dean used to do for me. I was right here, so..." He smiled. "Don't worry, Mrs. McCoy. I'll teach you what I know."

SAM THE HERO​:

“There you go,” Sam said. “You’re okay. You’re safe. You’re home.” He smiled, nodding. “You’re okay.” He squeezed her hand. He momentarily glanced toward where Carol had disappeared to, but quickly returned his gaze to Hannah. “Feel a little better?”

Hannah squeezes his hand back, smiling, sniffling and nodding. “Thanks.”

Carol walks back out in a moment, seeing Sam still calming Hannah and her eyebrows furrow, and then her eyes widen as she realizes. “Darling, I’m so–”

“It’s all right, mom,” Hannah shrugs. “Sam was here.”

[unscrxpted]

"There you go," Sam said. "You're okay. You're safe. You're home." He smiled, nodding. "You're okay." He squeezed her hand. He momentarily glanced toward where Carol had disappeared to, but quickly returned his gaze to Hannah. "Feel a little better?"

SAM THE HERO​:

Sam nodded and smiled. “Good. You’re doing good. You’re safe.” He squeezed her hand back. “You’re okay. You’re okay.” He kept with the exaggerated breathing, maintaining as much eye contact as he could.

Hannah sniffles, taking deep breaths. “Safe. Safe.”

She finally starts to calm down, taking the deep breaths he’s demonstrating, settling slowly and calming down. “Okay. I’m okay.”

She takes another deep breath and lets it out slowly, smiling a bit. “Okay.”

[unscrxpted]

Sam held out his hand. "Hey. I'm here. You're home. I promise you. Okay? I need you to breathe." He exaggerated his slow breathing, trying to show her. He hoped it would help. "Squeeze my hand, Hannah. Ground yourself."

SAM THE HERO​:

Sam smiled. “You’re welcome.” He saw the disappointment behind her eyes, but said nothing. He jumped a little at the noise. Looking over at Hannah, he tensed. “Hannah? Hannah, hey look at me. You’re okay.”

Hannah breathes hard, eyes darting to Sam, trembling a bit, trying to calm back down, nodding when he speaks, but still panicking and unable to settle her breathing.

[unscrxpted]

Sam smiled. "You're welcome." He saw the disappointment behind her eyes, but said nothing. He jumped a little at the noise. Looking over at Hannah, he tensed. "Hannah? Hannah, hey look at me. You're okay."

WHO DO YOU THINK I AM​:

Sam laughed. “Uh… I think I was just about to get something to sleep in.” He sat down on the couch, shrugging. “But what I’m in is fine. You can go on to bed. I won’t run off while you’re asleep. Scout’s honor, ma'am.”

Carol laughs. “Oh, nonsense, we should get your clothes washed while you still have the opportunity, it’s not an issue. And even if you’re stubborn enough to insist on the couch, I’ll get you a pillow and blanket.”

She goes to take care of all of that, humming softly to herself.

[unscrxpted]

Sam nodded. "Uh... computer, one peanut butter and jelly sandwich, please?" He watched the sandwich materialize, whistling quietly. "I don't know if I'll ever get used to this."

He grabbed the plate and walked over to Hannah, sitting on the other side of the couch. He placed the sandwich beside her. "I don't know if you like them, but I've always found a PB&J is good for the soul. And the stomach."

WHO DO YOU THINK I AM​:

Sam laughed. “Uh… I think I was just about to get something to sleep in.” He sat down on the couch, shrugging. “But what I’m in is fine. You can go on to bed. I won’t run off while you’re asleep. Scout’s honor, ma'am.”

Carol laughs. “Oh, nonsense, we should get your clothes washed while you still have the opportunity, it’s not an issue. And even if you’re stubborn enough to insist on the couch, I’ll get you a pillow and blanket.”

She goes to take care of all of that, humming softly to herself.

[unscrxpted]

Sam shook his head. "Yeah, maybe." He pushed her hands away, laughing. "Night, Mrs. McCoy."

A few days passed. There was commotion in the house since Hannah had been found, with family friends checking in, and the crew making sure the house was safe. Sam had the temptation to sneak out amongst the crowd sometimes, but something always held him back. Maybe it was Hannah. She needed someone.

Still, he hadn't slept much. And when he did sleep, he expected to wake up in another motel and have it all be a dream.

"Uh, Mrs. McCoy?" Sam called sheepishly. "I'm... still not entirely sure how the replicator works. You just talk to it, right?"

WHO DO YOU THINK I AM​:

Sam laughed. “Uh… I think I was just about to get something to sleep in.” He sat down on the couch, shrugging. “But what I’m in is fine. You can go on to bed. I won’t run off while you’re asleep. Scout’s honor, ma'am.”

Carol laughs. “Oh, nonsense, we should get your clothes washed while you still have the opportunity, it’s not an issue. And even if you’re stubborn enough to insist on the couch, I’ll get you a pillow and blanket.”

She goes to take care of all of that, humming softly to herself.

[unscrxpted]

"Okay, okay," Sam laughed, waving her off. Was his mom ever like that? He stood and grabbed the nightshirt she'd gotten him earlier. May as well go change.

A few minutes later, he came out of the bathroom feeling ridiculous and unable to not laugh at himself. "All I need is a funny little hat and I'll be Ebenezer Scrooge."

WHO DO YOU THINK I AM​:

Sam laughed. “Uh… I think I was just about to get something to sleep in.” He sat down on the couch, shrugging. “But what I’m in is fine. You can go on to bed. I won’t run off while you’re asleep. Scout’s honor, ma'am.”

Carol laughs. “Oh, nonsense, we should get your clothes washed while you still have the opportunity, it’s not an issue. And even if you’re stubborn enough to insist on the couch, I’ll get you a pillow and blanket.”

She goes to take care of all of that, humming softly to herself.

[unscrxpted]

Sam laughed. "Uh... I think I was just about to get something to sleep in." He sat down on the couch, shrugging. "But what I'm in is fine. You can go on to bed. I won't run off while you're asleep. Scout's honor, ma'am."

THE STUBBORN SON​:

Sam nodded. “Okay.” He looked up at Hannah, waving a little. She’d be okay, eventually. And she’d be okay without him.

Probably.

He wasn’t certain. He had to believe it, though. Otherwise he knew he’d never let himself go back home.

Hannah waves back a bit as Bones and Carol take the kids home. Hannah steadfastly absolutely refuses to let go of Bones when they get home, and he chuckles, shaking his head before carrying her to bed, clearly deciding it’s not worth the fight this time.

Carol sighs, tucking in the younger three before going back to Sam. “All right. Where were we before everything happened?”

[unscrxpted]

Sam nodded. "Okay." He looked up at Hannah, waving a little. She'd be okay, eventually. And she'd be okay without him.

Probably.

He wasn't certain. He had to believe it, though. Otherwise he knew he'd never let himself go back home.

DO YOU HEAR YOURSELF​:

“This whole family is stubborn as all hell,” Sam said. He closed his eyes.

“I already told Rebecca I’d give this world a chance. But don’t hold your breath, Angie. More than likely, I’m going back home. Sorry, but that’s just the way it is.”

‘Probably why we want you,’ she writes, but has no idea if he’ll see it, just sighing and setting the PADD down, signing to Jared across the room with a shrug.

Bones notices Angie and sighs, but just tries to cheer the kids up, thanking the doctor. “All right, y’all, let’s head home.”

Madeline wakes up abruptly, blinking, rubbing her eyes and smiling at Carol. Hannah stays pressed tightly against Bones, but peering over his shoulder at Sam… not saying anything, totally quiet, just looking at him.

[unscrxpted]

"This whole family is stubborn as all hell," Sam said. He closed his eyes.

"I already told Rebecca I'd give this world a chance. But don't hold your breath, Angie. More than likely, I'm going back home. Sorry, but that's just the way it is."

STUBBORN LITTLE SHIT​:

“Turning my own logic against me,” Sam chuckled. “Yeah. Well, you win some, you lose some, right?”

He glanced to Bones and Hannah. “What I do… it keeps more kids like her from getting taken by monsters that should just be fairy tales, and it gets the ones that did some closure.” He looked at Angie, smiling sadly. “As long as civilians can be kept in the dark and protected, then I’m doing my job. And that’s enough.”

Angie shakes her head, rolling her eyes again.

‘You are not “some”, Sam. This is you, and your life. There are situations where you have to recognize that you need to come first. Believe it or not, this is one of them. You shouldn’t just go back to fulfill some kind of hopeless dream that you’ll do a dent when you’re the same age as my sister and completely on your own. You’re going to die being stupid and stubborn, and I want to believe you can do so much more than that.’

[unscrxpted]

"Turning my own logic against me," Sam chuckled. "Yeah. Well, you win some, you lose some, right?"

He glanced to Bones and Hannah. "What I do... it keeps more kids like her from getting taken by monsters that should just be fairy tales, and it gets the ones that did some closure." He looked at Angie, smiling sadly. "As long as civilians can be kept in the dark and protected, then I'm doing my job. And that's enough."

YOU’RE AN IDIOT​:

Sam looked around, shaking his head. “It’s a pretty unforgiving world. But it’s home. And it’s all I have left. I don’t need to be happy as long as I’m able to make sure other people can be. As long as everyone else is safe… that’s all that matters.”

Angie shakes her head and rolls her eyes, writing quickly.

‘Then you’ll never get it right. “As long as everyone is safe” will never happen because you will never be safe, either. You are setting yourself up to fail yourself. And from what I saw in there, yourself isn’t so bad a person that you should fail him.’

[unscrxpted]

Sam looked around, shaking his head. "It's a pretty unforgiving world. But it's home. And it's all I have left. I don't need to be happy as long as I'm able to make sure other people can be. As long as everyone else is safe... that's all that matters."

OKAY THAT’S FAIR THOUGH:

“A few weeks,” Sam sighed. “Maybe a little longer. I don’t know if it’ll be enough but… at the least I can teach you guys how to help her.”

He took a deep breath. “Look, I… I have a whold world to get back to, Angie. And… all I have left of my family is there.” He shrugged. “I can’t just leave it.”

She pauses and nods a bit, writing quickly, pausing and rereading what she wrote before handing it back.

‘Be honest, how much do you miss that world, and how much does it miss you? You’re allowed to be happy, Sam, and I don’t think you really were there. We just want you to have a real… life, instead of whatever you’d call what you went through there.’