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dre6ming · 2 years

Text

The delicate beginning rush

Chapter XI - it’s now or never

Masterlist <all chapters here>

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Pairing: Austin Butler x singer/actress fem reader

Warning: age gap (10 years), mentions of sex, explicit language, fluff, angst

Plot: working with Baz on the soundtrack of Elvis, then flying out to Canada to film, you miss Austin and the both of you put in the effort to make it work

Word count: 6700

Disclaimer: everything fake

Nervous doesn't cover even a tenth of what I'm feeling right now. My flight was awful, it got delayed and then there were turbulence the entire time, so I couldn't sleep, something, I desperately wanted to do, since I couldn't close an eye the whole night. I'm also a bit nauseous. From what? I can't say, maybe it's all the emotional turmoil I've been in or maybe it's just my period coming to bless me. Either way, I feel every single little bump in the road as Matt drives us to the RCA studio. Singing an Elvis song is a huge responsibility in itself, but singing it for the soundtrack of the new biopic, that hasn't even come out yet, it's bigger than huge, it's ginormous.

All morning since we landed 3 hours ago I've been doing vocal exercises, trying to open my throat and get sounds as smooth as possible. I'm pretty sure poor Matt, who's been the main recipient of my singing exercises, is ready to have me shut up and I don't blame him.

The whether in Memphis is a lot colder than LA, but almost everywhere is colder than LA. The sky is clear and the blue shade of it, reminds me of Austin's eyes, which immediately makes my heart sting, because I miss him. He said he would text and call, and it's been only a couple of hours, he texted me "sweet dreams" last night and a "good morning, my darling" this morning. I replied to both, but our conversations were cut short. Last night after I told Joshua that I ultimately think we're better off as friends and maybe work partners with our upcoming duet, I had to pack and go to sleep so there wasn't much time left for me to talk to Austin. And this morning we are both swamped with work.

Thinking back on my conversation with Joshua, I can't help but feel like I was horrible to him and I'd understand if he never wanted to see me again, my team really wants him to feature of my next song "Past life". I haven't even finished it, but I'm close to it and I know I'll have to make it a single, because the whole debacle with Joshua will bring attention to it. Just like the double release of both of out songs boosted the both of us. My team tells me I'm bound to a spot on the top 10 hot 100 and so is Joshua. It also lingers in my mind that I don't want to upset Austin by being close to Joshua, but he's generally a nice boy and talented and in the end it would all be a PR thing, right? Just like him and Kaia, why should it be any different for me? I won't fake a relationship, I'll just sing a duet song about letting yourself love and be loved.

Pressing my finger into my temple I try not to let the headache creep up on me, but my brain has been on high alert for months now. First the divorce of my parents, then the award season, work and now boys. Ugh...

As the car comes to a stop, I zip up my jacket and put my hood on, there doesn't seem to be any paparazzi, but it's better to be safe than sorry. Inside the studio the heat engulfs me and I find myself struggling to take off my warm puffer jacket. "You nervous, miss? You look like you're about to faint." I look at Matt wide eyed. "Really?" I ask in disbelief, touching my face, pinching it to get the blood flowing through my cheeks. He smiles at me, taking the jacket from my hands and resting a calming hand on my shoulder. "You have no reason to be, I know you'll be amazing."

"Agreed. Good day, miss (Y/n)!" Baz comes in extending a hand out to me. "Hello, it's an honor, I'm happy to be here." Baz shrugs me off. "The honor is mine, thank you for coming so soon." He then turns to Matt to shake hands with him as well, something not many do, only because he usually blends in the back and doesn't really get noticed. "You must be (y/n)'s dad, a pleasure to meet you sir, you have an amazing young lady of a daughter here." My smile drops, he thinks Matt is my dad.

I see how Matt doesn't really know how to react, moving his weight for one leg to the other. "Mathew is my driver and head of security, but I appreciate your kind words." I quickly say.

"A pleasure to meet you mr Luhrmann and yes, she is an amazing young lady, there you're quite right." Matt smiles and then he excuses himself, going back to the car. I hate that there's now awkwardness between me and Baz. "I'm sorry for assuming..." Baz starts to apologize, but there's nothing to be sorry for, so I cut him short. "No please, it's fine, if anything he is sort of like a father to me." I assure and Baz smiles at me, showing me the way around the studio.

"So any more exciting plans?" He makes conversation as we sit down. "Yes, I just booked a movie for Netflix and well I'm making music, I'm really just doing what I love and I'm lucky enough to have people around me who support that." I smile as he listens closely to me. "Well you're incredible and on the right path if you ask me, congratulations again for your achievement, an Oscar is a big thing." I wave him off, blushing.

"It is, but it's still just a piece of metal on a shelf, I have to expect that not everything I will do will be so well received, but I'm trying my hardest to make good art moving forward." I explain to him, my thinking. Getting swept away it's extremely easy, especially when you achieve something like I just did, but in my mind, luck has a big part in everything and when luck gives out, I'll need the work and talent to compensate for it. "You amaze me, I think I've met 40 year olds with Oscars who believe they walk on the sun, just because of that title. That kind of mentality will keep you grounded and will only bring you more proud achievements." He says in his thick Australian accent, the chain bracelets around his wrists clinging as he articulated his words with hand movements. "I have a little something for you, I was talking to Pricilla about the sound track and the specific scene where we want to put your singing is one with Elvis and her." He fumbles around his leather jacket, pulling out a small box. "And I told her I was thinking of you to sing "can't help falling in love", she loved the idea, said she was extremely smitten to meet you at the Gala and she asked that I give you this."

He pushes the black velvet box towards me and I take it with shaking hands. Baz leans forward, placing a hand on his chin and tapping his forefinger against his lips, waiting for me to open the box. I lift the top slowly, to reveal a thin gold cuff bracelet with black diamonds imbedded in it. It looks like one of those very popular Cartier bracelets, but the design is a bit different, the bracelet is not a straight band of gold, but rather a squiggly one. "Oh no this is too much!" I gasp trying to give the box back, but Baz pushes against it. "Priscilla said Elvis had this custom made for her when she turned 20, she said you remind her of her younger self a lot, witty, beautiful, smart, hardworking and kind. Pick it up, read the inside." I feel tears of joy prick my eyes and with a bit of struggle I lift the bracelet up from the box to look on the inside of it. There engraved in the gold, in cursive letters it reads: Tender Loving Care ~ for my Cilla from your E.

The overwhelming feeling of happiness takes over me and tears start flowing down my face. Baz takes the bracelet from my grasp and taking my right wrist in his hand he slides the bracelet on. It fits like a glove, sitting beautifully against my skin, providing a comforting weight around my wrist. "She had work to attend and she couldn't be here today, but she hopes that you might want to join her for dinner tomorrow night." Baz adds, offering me a tissue.

I mumble a quick thank you and dry my face, hoping I don't look too bad. "This means a lot," I suck in a breath. "I'd love nothing more than to have dinner with her. Are you sure she wants me to keep this? It looks very expensive and it's hers-" Baz takes my hands in his, smoothing the skin over my knuckles. "I'm sure, now what do you say I introduce you to our producer and we get to work?" I giggle and nod, following him inside the recording room, where he starts introducing me to everyone.

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Hours later I'm on my way back to my hotel, where I plan to just sit in bed and sleep the rest of the day. The recording process went smoothly, I have to go back tomorrow morning to do a couple more takes and finish the background vocals, then we should be set. Baz let me watch the scene for which I'm recording the cover of the song. It's Austin and his costar Olivia, he's dressed in a military uniform, which has no business being that sexy. The two of them talk for a bit and they end up kissing. The scene looked amazing and it told me that the rest of the movie will probably be a success as well, but I couldn't help the little sting in my heart when Austin's lips locked with Olivia's. I tried to play it cool and I hope I did, I'm not sure how much Baz knows about me and Austin, but he never brought him up so neither did I.

"Thank you so much Matt, I'll just be in my room for the rest of the day." I tell him, walking out of the elevator and heading for my room. "Have a good night miss!" I wave at him, unlocking my door and walking into the warm hotel room.

After a quick shower I put on my comfy pajamas, plopping down on the fluffy bed. I stare at my wrist, where the bracelet from Priscilla sits nicely. The black diamonds on it shine in the light. It's unbelievable she wanted me to have such an expensive and important piece of her life. And to think that she sees me as a younger version of herself flatters me beyond description.

As I turn around in bed, I pick up my phone, opening the text messages with Austin.

Me:

Just got to my hotel, I'm done for the day. How about you? 💜🧶

Austin B🕺:

I've got another hour or so, before I can head home. Did you have a good day?

Me:

Yeah I really did! You?

Austin B🕺:

Ugh almost, you know it's getting pretty boring answering all these questions.

Me:

Sorry, ik how that is.

Austin B🕺:

Can I call you when I get home?

Me:

Ofc, I'm free until tomorrow.

Austin B🕺:

Are you gonna tell me what this 'work thing' is? I'm just curious

Me:

Told ya it's a surprise, you're gonna have to wait.

Austin B🕺:

Ok... talk soon 💜🧶

Me:

💜🧶.

I relax into my pillows and stare at the ceiling, unable to stop the huge smile on my face. Slowly I feel sleep creeping up on me and my heavy eyelids give up, falling closed. I'll only doze off for a second, I don't want to miss Austin's call. But it seems that I'm so tired, that I can't actually hold onto my plan and I fall asleep.

After what seems like only minutes, I'm woken up by my phone. I try to rub the sleep away from my eyes, letting out a big yawn. "Baby, I'm so sorry, did I wake you?" Austin asks worried that he interrupted my rest.

" 's fine" I mumble still sleepy. "I was just, resting my eyes." He chuckles, shaking his head. "The ceiling of your room looks nice" Austin quirks, letting me know my still awaking muscles don't seem to have the strength to hold up my phone. I straighten the phone so now the camera captures me, with my hair going in a thousand different directions and my eyes barely open. "There's my beautiful baby, did you have a busy day?" I shake my head and hide my face in the pillows, acting like a small child not wanting to wake up.

"I want to see your eyes (y/n), let me!" Slowly I turn my face to reveal to him, my hazy eyes. A smile takes over his face immediately and I can't help but mirror it. "Are you gonna tell me where you are? It can't be far, since we seem to be on close time zones still." Biting my lip, I place my finger against my lips, not budging into giving any indication about where I am or what I'm doing. He sighs, scratching his head. "Am I gonna have to wait long for this surprise?" Austin tries, but I answer with a simple shrug of my shoulders, which makes him laugh.

"I want to kiss you so bad right now." The breath gets caught in my chest and I can see myself blushing, on the phone screen. "I want that too, maybe come to New York before I have to leave for Canada?" I suggest, but his face says it all. He can't come. I try to push aside the pain in my heart, holding onto hope that maybe I'm reading him wrong.

"I can't baby, I've got a lot of promotion to do and -" he licks his lips, pausing mid sentence, like he's trying to come up with the best way to say what's coming next. "Me and Kaia have to, um" the sound of her name, stabs me in the chest, it shouldn't, but it does, because he's not mine, he's not hers either, but she at least gets to have him more than I do. "We have to do a lot more press, outings and PDA stuff, I promise it doesn't mean anything, I have no control over it and neither does she." His excuse sounds hollow and it doesn't rest my soul in the slightest. There's this voice in the back of my head saying, I've only heard his side of the story, but never hers. He could be lying.

The lump that lodges itself in my throat, makes it difficult for me to breathe, but I try not to show that. "(Y/n)?" Concern drips off of Austin's tongue, he must know that what he just said hurt me. I clear my voice and try to make it sound as steady as I can. "That's fine" lie "it's all just pretend anyway." Lie, lie, lie... I feel like he's lying, like I'm lying, I feel like I'm being gaslit and taken advantage of.

"It's not, I can see on your face it's not, it's ok to be upset, I wouldn't want to be in your position and I swear I wish it could've been you in Kaia's place." That's when it hits me, two can play this game. Me and Joshua still have a duet to release and even though we are friends now, the song is a love song. "Well it's fine, I mean, me and Joshua will probably have to do some promotion for our song anyway, too, so I get it." Lie, why do I keep lying to him?

Austin's lips stretch into a think line. For the first time since we've met, there's awkward silence between us and I hate it. My ears start ringing and if I wasn't sat in bed, I'd probably be fainting. "I'm sorry!" Austin says. Why is he apologizing? I'm confused. "(Y/n) you don't need to feel like you're competing with Kaia, would you feel better if you talked to her?" Blinking a few times, to refocus my vision, I seriously start to wonder if Austin can read my mind. "Would that be embarrassing for me? I- I believe you Austin, but..."

"But you need to be wary of your heart, my daring, I know. It wouldn't be embarrassing, I talked to Alex, the dude she's seeing, I don't see why she won't do the same for me." Austin explains, fidgeting with the rings around his long fingers. I chew the inside of my cheek, debating over if I should take him on his offer or not. The part of my brain that's infatuated with him tells me not to, but the smarter part of my brain pushes me to do it. "I guess I'd feel a bit better, if it's ok with you."

The smile returns to Austin's face, as he bites his bottom lip. "Ok baby, I'll tell her about it." Then he breaks into laughter and even though I can't help but smile, my stomach twists thinking he's laughing at me. "I'm laughing because, remember when we went out for coffee?" I nod waiting for him to go on, no idea where this is going. "Well Kaia wasn't the one who wanted to meet up, I lied." He scrunches up his nose, rubbing it with the back of his hand. "I, um I asked her if I could say that she was the one who wanted to meet you for coffee, but it was actually me, all along." I'm stunned. Him wanting me is such a strange thing, but it's real, very real. "Really?" I ask

Austin nods, rubbing his lips together, before wetting them with his tongue. "I guess after that night at the Met, I just want to know you better, but I didn't want to google it or anything, I wanted to meet you from you." My heart is doing laps in my chest and it's getting hard to breathe. I see myself blushing on the screen and I can't help but feel a bit embarrassed by how easily Austin gets my heart pounding. "And then dinner at your place, well Kaia was supposed to come, but she really did have to fly out. I almost ditched, but I guess I told myself: it's now or never."

"Be mine forever..." I sing, giggling, which makes him smile brighter than ever before. "Well that one is a great song, I do have to say." Austin points out. "Aren't they all?" I quirk a brow at him, biting back my smile. "They are, they are!" He admits. I feel another yawn coming through and I try to stop it, but failing.

"Rest the phone on the pillow and close your eyes, I'll sing you to sleep." He says in a low raspy voice. I open my mouth ready to tell him I'm not that tired, but another yawn comes out and Austin giggles. I place the phone on the pillow next to my head, so he can se me laying on my side in bed. "You're beautiful, so beautiful!" He says and I take in a deep breath, blinking fast. "Now close your eyes!" Austin tells me and I comply, but knowing he's there watching me, makes keeping my eyes closed, feel like torture.

"Try to think that love's not around, Still, it's uncomfortably near" he sings softly, tickling my senses. I recognize the song immediately. "You remembered?" I gasp opening my eyes to look at him, finding him with his lips stretched in a big smile over his pearly white teeth. "Of course I did, my brain is a sponge for everything you say, now eyes closed baby, you need to sleep." I giggle and snuggle my face back in the pillow enjoying the soft fabric of it. Austin clears his throat and continues singing 'Angels eyes', the song I told him was my favorite out of Frank Sinatra's discography. My heart twists in my chest with this warm feeling I've been having only around him, a feeling I can't yet describe. "My old heart ain't gainin' any ground. Because my angel eyes ain't here" funny enough the lyrics kinda work for our situation as we are apart right now.

As he keeps on singing, I feel sleep take over me slowly and I try to fight it, wanting to enjoy his voice some more, but I'm so tired I don't even make it through the whole song before I fall into a deep slumber.

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"Falling in love with you..." I finish my last take for the song, taking off my headphones and going over to the producer to listen back to my vocals. "This sounds beautiful, so beautiful!" Baz says, clapping for me. "Thank you, oh my, I really hope I did good." I say placing a hand on my chest, smiling brightly.

"Oh you did, definitely, it sounds so magical the way you sing it...in fact I was thinking, why don't you join us at the Cannes Film Festival in June? You could perform at the premiere after the screening, I think it would be magical." Baz articulated his words with big hand gestures, as I try to wrap my head around everything he's saying. He wants me to perform at the premiere of Elvis? At Cannes?

He must of read the fear written all over my face, since his smile glitches for a second. "Sir, it's an honor. Really. But are you sure you want me to perform? I mean by that time I would've barely dipped my toe in the music industry..."

"Let me just stop you there, you realize who you're talking about right?" My brows draw together in confusion. "You are talking about a very talented young woman, who has an incredible voice, whose songs are charting and whose movies are adored and awarded. So yes honey, I'm sure." Trying to hide my blush, I look away, but I can't actually contain my smile. By now I'm used to people saying things like that to me, but it's still very hard to swallow. I can't deny most of that, but my forever present lack of confidence and overthinking issues put a dent in my joy. "Well if you think it's what you want, then I'll do it." I agree and Baz is quick to hug me tightly. I pat his back, struggling to breathe in his tight hold. "Easy there, I need these lungs to sing." I laugh and he lets go of me, looking at me with a huge smile. I can't really describe it, but everything about Baz just screams father figure and for some reason in the short time I've spend with him, I've grown quite fond of his words and affection. "Well get ready to fly miss (y/n)!" Baz adds snapping her fingers with excitement.

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After I had dinner with Priscilla, I was back on a plane to New York, where I only got to stay for 5 days before packing my cats and bags to move to Canada for 3 to 4 months. It's actually quite nice here, a bit colder then I'd expected, but still lovely. The sights are wonderful, even with summer approaching there's plenty of snow so it feels like a prolonged winter, which in my opinion is always welcomed.

Filming has been going smoothly, Kyle and I have been having lots of fun with it and the more we work the more I get confident that this movie will be great. The love story between the two characters is epic and the development of it is so well built. It's truly unfortunate that they got their story cut short, but at least my character Tessa seems like she might be headed for a good ending.

In my free time I've been busy FaceTiming Jack and Finneas, recording takes in the makeshift studio we had built in the small apartment. Also I've been texting back and forth with Taylor, working with her on her new album, I don't plan to be a featured artist on it, just a co-writer on some of the tracks as well as the usual background vocals.

Now in all this work load one might wonder where do I fit 'a more than friends' situation. Well it barely fits, me and Austin try to make it work. We text everyday and call regularly, we tell each other about our day and future plans and work, so far I've played him most of my upcoming album, but I'm still keeping secret me being part of the Elvis Soundtrack or the fact that I'll be at Cannes with him. While he'll be there with his girlfriend, a girlfriend that's not me. Sure I've spoken to Kaia, I even met Alex, her real boyfriend, over FaceTime, but it still hurts to see the guy you like be packaged and sold with someone else.

Still even with all this talking and texting the distance is hard, I miss him, the scent of him, his warm touch. It's been a very long month. I miss it all and now as I push my way through the door of my small rental apartment a sigh leaves my lips. The place looks nice and it's cozy, but besides me and my two cats it's empty. Not as empty as the huge penthouse in New York, but close and I guess that answers my question about selling the penthouse and moving to a smaller apartment. Turns out just making the cage smaller, doesn't really make the inside feel fuller.

Today the apartment looks a bit different though, almost like something is missing? My cats! "William? Simba? Here kitty kitty!" I call them, but they don't come out of their hiding which makes anxiety bubble inside me. I take my jacket and shoes off in a hurry and make my way through the small hallway into the living room. I decide the kitchen might be a good place to search for my little trouble makers. The place is dead quiet and my cats are missing.

Suddenly the creaking floor behind me, scares the life out of me. Turning around I cover my mouth to stifle a scream. And there in front of my eyes with a grin on his face is...

"Austin!" I squeal and run over to him, jumping in his arms, latching myself onto him like a little monkey, locking my ankles behind his back. I nuzzle my face in the crook of his neck, inhaling his intoxicating scent. "Missed me, my darling?" I kiss his neck along his pulse line, all the way up to the corner of his mouth, letting my teeth graze his skin ever so slightly. "Yes I did." I say, brushing my lips over his, tasting his breath on my tongue. The corners of his mouth turn upward and one of his big hands leaves my back, to rest on my cheek, pulling me all the way into his mouth. We both sigh into the kiss, after weeks of being apart, touching him feels surreal and it's like life is coming back to me. Being far from him was horrible, I felt his absence in every pore. But now he's here. Austin is here.

He moves his lips against mine, slow and gentle, the tip of his tongue tickling my bottom lip, teasing. With a short gasp I let him in and he takes dominance into the kiss, sucking the breath out of me. "How did you?" I say out of breath resting my forehead against his, brushing my fingers through his hair, to make sure he's real and not just a product of my imagination. "Matt helped me a bit, he gave me the key." He shrugs his shoulders like it's nothing. My smile is so big and I can't help the way my heart beast against my chest. Austin's hand that's cupping my cheek, slides along my neck and finds a resting spot on my chest above my heart. "It's like a humming bird, for fucks sake, I've missed you!" He admits bumping our noses together, kissing the tip of my nose. "My pretty baby." Austin whispers with his lips against my cheek.

My eyes flutter close and I feel lightheaded, the way he calls me his, has my brain turning to jello. "I missed you too" I admit, squeezing him tighter. He slowly starts to move around the place, setting me on the kitchen counter. "I have a few free days and I wanted to surprise you." Grabbing a handful of his sweater I pull him closer, there's heat coming off of him and I enjoy it, having missed it for weeks now. "Baby? Are you upset?" Austin asks pulling back to look at me. Confused I shake my head and he comes down to kiss my cheek right under my eye. His flaming lips touch my still cold skin and his tongue teases my flesh. "Why are you crying then?" He whispers.

"Oh, oh, I'm, no -" I turn around and reach for the tissue roll, grabbing one and quickly dabbling my face. "It's because I just came out of the cold. My eyes water." I set the crumbled up tissue aside and thread my hands through his long blond hair, pulling at the roots. "Hm" he hums, tilting his head back. I smile and kiss his pulse line. "Have you eaten?" Austin asks, holding my waist, squeezing my sides. "No, I was going to...where are William and Simba?" I question remembering what had me stressed in the beginning.

Chuckling lightly Austin moves away from between my legs, leaving my arms to fall limp. He walks over to the door of my bedroom and opens it, the two cats coming running out of the room. "I asked them nicely to let me have my moment." He smirks.

I jump down form the counter, picking up Simba, as he goes to pick up William, who seems to have taken a special liking towards Austin. "I bought treats for them on the way here, but you'll need to approve them, cause I've never had cats before." Austin speaks, scratching William's stomach. Something about the way he acts around my cats makes me feel some type of way. "I never asked, why William? I mean Simba I get, the lion king, right? But this little guy?" William purrs in Austin's arms, snuggling close to his chest. "My favorite book series when I was 16 had a character named William."

"So no link to the royals?" He laughs and I simply shake my head, placing a kiss on top of Simba's head. "Ok then." He puts William down on the nearby couch, clapping his hands. "Sit right here and I'll make you dinner, how does some chicken cooked in the oven with white wine and rosemary potatoes sound?" I sit on the couch and twist around to face him. "Sounds like something very, very tasty." I unbutton my knitted cardigan as I'm starting to feel the warmth inside the apartment. Austin watches me take off my cardigan, then like snapping himself out of a haze, he blinks fast, turning on his heels to go start working on dinner.

Closing my eyes for just a moment, I hold Simba close to my chest and William comes to curl next to my head, purring. "So I've been thinking maybe tomorrow you could get a free day and we could spend it together? Go on a walk on the beach, watch a movie." Austin proposes and I take my phone out, already texting the director about getting a free day.

"We could, I'll see if I can get the day off, we're on time with filming so there's a big chance I will get it." Getting up, I stretch my arms and legs, going to the bedroom to change into something more comfortable. A fluffy cream loungewear set is my choice and I braid my hair out of my face. After the few minutes it takes me to get unready, when I come back in the kitchen, Austin is putting the food in the oven for it to cook.

I come behind him and hug his waist, pushing my face into his back, inhaling his woodsy scent. His hands come to hold my, rubbing up my arms. "The interview with Variety is coming out tomorrow, are you excited?" Austin asks me, spinning around in my arms to face me. He leans against the kitchen counter, looking down at me with his bright blue eyes. "I guess I am, yeah, it's a beautiful peace and what about you, a new Elvis trailer is coming soon, are you excited?" I wiggle my brows at him, making him laugh with his head thrown back. "I am, now about those treats I brought." He goes out of my arms, over to his bag which was hidden behind the couch. He digs through it and pulls out a bag of cat treats, coming over to hand it to me. "Salmon, their favorite" smiling I shake the bag and both of my cats, quickly jump off the couch. Austin opens the bag and crouches down holding a few treats in each of his palms, so the little fluff balls can enjoy them. My heart feels so light in my chest, watching him be here, for me, doing these small acts of affection.

I sit down on the floor next to him and hug his neck, peppering kisses all over his face. Austin giggles like a child and turning quickly around he tackles me to the ground, with him on top of me, tickling me sides. While his skilled fingers, tickle my stomach, his wet full lips kiss my neck tenderly. "Austin.." I laugh trying to push him off of me, but not really putting any effort into it, since I don't want him to actually get up. "I'm making Dandelions a single." I say between fits of laughter, which stops Austin in his tracks and he comes up to catch my lips in a sweet kiss. "I love that song so much." He mumbles against my lips.

We move in sink, our lips soft and wet, brushing against one another. My heart keeps doing laps in my chest and heat rises within me. I wrap my legs around his waist and pull Austin closer. His tongue touches my bottom lip and I give him full permission to explore. My brain is blank, all I know and care about is him on me. I don't even care about the hard wood floor hurting my back. I walk my hands over to his back, dragging my nails down it. "Mmh baby." Austin groans and a little whimper escapes me.

His hands grab my hips, holding me flush to the floor. "We need to stop baby." He kisses down my neck, sucking the skin above my collarbone, dragging his tongue over the flesh. "I don't want to." I whine, bringing his face back up, kissing him forcefully, squeezing my legs around his waist, bringing his crotch close to mine. Austin moans, thrusting his hips against mine. "Aus..." I sigh with my head thrown back and my eyes screwed shut.

I'm in a bliss, my senses completely diluted by the powerful feeling of him on top of me. But he pulls back swiftly, bracing himself on his arms above me. My head lifts off the floor, trying to reach his lips, but he holds his ground, pulling even further back. "Baby, no, I don't want you doing something just because you feel pressured or anything." He speaks in a low voice, brushing some of the strands of hair that came out of my braid. His calloused fingers magic against my soft skin.

Embarrassed I turn my head away from him, suddenly feeling so out of place. "No, (y/n), honey it's normal to want to do stuff, but..." I don't want him to finish talking so I push against his chest wanting to get up from the floor, away from him. Every cell in me feels so stupid for acting so so, I don't even know. Austin let's me get up, but he's quick to join me onto the couch and pull me into his chest, kissing the top of my head. "I'd do anything for you, (y/n), I swear, but I'm not sure you want to have sex now." I hide my face in my hands, but he takes my wrist and move my hands away, so he can look me in the eyes.

"How does it feel? I mean I'm sure you've done it, I'm just curious." I feel my cheeks on fire, but I have to ask, I've been curious for a while now and I didn't really have anyone to ask. Austin smiles at me, but not in a way that makes me feel dumb, but rather in a way that makes me feel safe. "I don't know how to describe it and I don't know how it feels for girls, but for me, it just feels good, you feel warm all over and your heart pounds in your chest and then it feels like there's this elastic band that keeps on stretching and stretching until it finally snaps and it's the most euphoric feeling." He twirls around a strand of my hair, kissing my forehead. "I'll show you, when you feel ready." He promises.

"What if I'm ready now?" I ask looking at him with puppy eyes. "It's your choice (y/n)" looking down at my lap, I try to think, really think if I'm ready for sex, sex with Austin. I don't know really, I want to see what it feels like and I trust him to be loving and caring about it, but I have yet to fully label us as a couple, so it would just feel like jumping over a few steps. "I was just curious, I think" I shrug my shoulders.

"And I'm happy you felt comfortable with telling me that..." he stops mid sentence, pursing his lips, "have you ever, done anything? Alone or with anyone?" He asks and I look around a bit confused, but I understand what he means. "N-no, I um, I've read some about it, I've seen movies and I think I've felt, aroused?" I'm unsure of what I'm saying is right and there's a part of me that fears I'm laughable, but Austin is serious, listening closely. "Okay, have you touched yourself?" He ask, caressing my back. I simply shake my head.

Austin licks his lips, his eyes, never leaving mine. "Well I think you should try that first, maybe, find what you like on your own."

"How do I do it?" I ask, I'm not stupid I know a bit about self pleasure, but I've never done it. His lips come close to the shell of my ear, as he speaks in a raspy tone, causing shivers to crawl down my spine. "I can show you, if you want me to." I open my mouth ready to speak, but instead of words, a ding sound comes out, the timer for the food finished, so Austin sighs getting up to take the food out. I'm left on the couch, flushed watching him move around the kitchen. He turns around holding the tray of food smiling brightly at me, so I giggle getting up and joining him at the table, ready to enjoy his cooking.

Tags: @kittenlittle24 @amorx @cryingabtab @lexicox044 @lrissa @feral4austinbutler @sageskywalker @jesssssicaa @rainydayz101 @flwersgarden @bobthefishiesworld @captured-memory @homebodybirkin2003 @galaxygirl453 @butlerslut @chrisevansgirl34 @myradiaz @pennyroyalcreep @macey234 @im-lame-irl @lordandmistress @the-girl-wh0-cries-w0lf @poppet05 @gabbywontlose @4shbug @0-thegoodwitch-0 @hauntedarchivesx @chewiethecatus @sunnyx07 @francesbloomer @jessaroni19 @finelineskies @stargirlbytheweeknd @cerenaydins-blog @girlblogger2002 @gigisworldsstuff @my-baexht-Is @denised916 @bluepeacheslandia @kibumslatina @samaraannhan20 @goldobsessionworld @silliypapercreatorangle @cmrxac @donnamarie23 @justarandomfamdomblog @marlowmode @natsnosehair @xxgggooomm @banksmars @namoreno @areuirish @choppedlamphandscowboy @yeetfack-blog @fangirl125reader @aliceforbes @k-1898 @lucid315 @katelswan @jellysquidjj @jojam10 @richardslady121 @fanfiction1107 @spideysbitch @cherryflvredconversations @lanasfloridakiloss @issabella1107 @hannahhhhhig @izzydefinatelybusy @purejasmine

#the delicate beginning rush #austin butler #austin butler x reader #baz luhrmann elvis #austin butler fic #austin #austin butler x you #austin butler x y/n #austin butler imagine #austin butler fanfiction #Austin butler x actress reader #love #fluff

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rxin3akamallory · 11 months

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(So I wrote this as soon as I thought about Rocket and Lylla reuniting in Vol. 3 again. I thought, what if Magril had a similar experience? This takes place before the films, only a couple years after Magril escapes Halfworld and becomes a ravager.

Read this post for more context.

And PLEASE keep the TWs in mind before reading, ty ♡)

TW: Implied Attempted

Su!c!d3/S3lf H@rm

Hotline Numbers:

USA: 988

Canada: (833) 456-4566

Other regins

White took over Magril’s vision when she woke up. She couldn’t quite pinpoint where exactly she was, but the surrounding cages made the place feel.. familiar? But Magril’s environment wasn’t the only thing that made this situation strangely nostalgic to her. In the distance she could hear two voices laughing. One was high pitched and one was deep and gentle.

Magril: Those voices..

Before Magril could process who the voices belonged to, she could hear someone approaching from behind. She turns around, a brown female otter who was slightly taller than her and sporting two mechanical arms slowly walked her way.

Lylla: Friend… What are you doing here?

Magril: *gasp* Ly.. Lylla..?

Lylla gave Magril the same kind and warm smile she’d always have. Although, it fades when she notices the wounds that harshly ran across Magril’s arms.

Lylla: My dear friend, what’s happened?

Magril: *sniffle* I’m.. still a friend to you?

Lylla: Of course you’re my friend, Magril.

Magril: B-But, that night! I-I.. *choke* I said horrible things to you. I was so selfish! *sniffle* Why would you possibly want a friend like me?

Lylla: Selfish doesn’t always mean bad. Selfless and selfish are balanced. You were scared, that isn’t selfish. We all experience fear.

Magril: Yeah, and look where mine’s gotten you.

Lylla: Magril… Why are we here? What drove you to do this to yourself?

Magril: I couldn’t bring myself to tell you what was going on. If I had just said something… I’d be here right now instead of you.

Lylla: Magril, that’s already done. You can’t do anything to change what happened to us. But you can change what happens to you.

Magril: Why should I? There’s no reason a coward like me should stay. Why spare me? What did I do other than lead you to your graves!? You, *choke* and Floor, and Teefs, *sniffle* and Rocket…

As she named each of her friends, she realized one was missing. Rocket. The raccoon who shared a cage with Floor.

Magril: Wait.. Where’s Rocket?

Lylla’s smile returns once Magril puts two and two together.

Magril: Wait.. did he..?

Lylla’s nod was the only answer Magril needed. Relief washed over her features. Rocket survived, he’s alive and still out there.

Lylla: I know you see no reason to keep going, but you still have a purpose here. Don’t give up yet.

Lylla gently embraced Magril, who started to cry again.

Magril: *sniffle* I’m sorry, Lylla..

Lylla only shook her head in response.

Lylla: You can do it. You’re so strong, much stronger than you realize. I know you’ll make it through this. And then one day, you and Rocket can come flying with us.

Tears form in Magril’s eyes.

Magril: Into the forever and beautiful sky…

Magril suddenly feels herself falling then a split second later she finds herself in the med bay onboard the ravager ship. Kraglin and Quill were over her, tears staining their faces.

Quill: Magril? Magril!

Kraglin: Magril! Thank god!

Magril: Nrgh.. Guys..?

The two pull Magril into a hug as she was still trying to process what just happened.

Kraglin: Are you okay!? We found you bleeding!

Quill: There was a knife next to you and we thought someone attacked you!

Kraglin: And you didn’t have a pulse for around ten minutes, we were worried sick!

Magril’s heart sank to the pit of her stomach. The amount of pain she put her own brothers through broke her heart. She tightly embraced them as tears streamed down her cheeks.

Magril: *sobs* I’m so sorry! I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry. *choke* I’m so sorry. *sniffle* I love you so much, I’m so sorry.

Quill: It’s okay. We love you too, Magril.

Kraglin: We’re just glad you’re okay.

♡

Here are the numbers again if you wish to seek help.

USA: 988

Canada: (833) 456-4566

Other regions

If no one has reminded you, then I will. You are loved, you are wanted, NEEDED. And most importantly, you matter. ♡

☆彡 @raccoonfallsharder | @twigglestblog | @bakaotakulife

#tw #tw implied sh #tw implied attempted sewer slide #gotg #guardians of the galaxy #gotg oc #guardians of the galaxy oc #self insert oc #magril gotg #magril opossum #lylla otter #lylla gotg #peter quill #kraglin #hurt/comfort #angst #happy ending

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creativecuteness · 1 year

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One of a Kind Vamp: Chapter 2 Who I was Before

Summary: After the events of Jesse's downfall Rory and Dakota take time to process and reflect the craziness of the past week, while discussing Rory's past and potential future

as I said before I wrote this and chapter one in one night while listening to Gorillaz debut album, G-Sides and Laika Come Home all of which are awesome, and you give a listen like I had so much fun vibing to them. Also this fic takes place shortly after the movie so if you can invasion Rory in his outfit at the end of the movie that would be great. And again, Dakota could either be ten or fourteen in this fic with that enjoy.

There was something about cuddling in the arms of a good friend that brought Rory insane amounts of comfort: a warm body pressed on his stomach, firm arms wrapped around his back, and a head resting on his chest as they lay there, listening to the sounds of their breathing and the silence of his still beating heart. Even though he was a newly full-fledged vampire, Rory never considered himself cold-blooded. Sure, his body temperature did fall after turning, but not to the point where he needed a heated blanket or warmer clothes, considering he could wear short sleeves and his thin flannel overshirt’s just fine.

Heck, he’s lived in Canada his whole life; he’s used to the crisp chill, fall brings and the harsh, bitter cold of winter. So maybe he truly was just used to the cold.

But if there was one thing becoming a vampire did do, was make him more aware of different heat sources, like the one holding him now, as if he’d disappear at any moment.

Now that Jesse was defeated, they all finally had the time to process everything that happened to them, and it seems now was the time for Dakota to process her shock of Rory’s near-death experience. He still couldn’t believe they came all that way to Jesse’s party to save him from being someone’s dinner or that he meant so much to them. Not to mention the fact that Dakota was falling in love with him; he never expected to catch the eyes of the new girl and her best friend, but here he was cuddling his little lover, hoping to reassure her that he’s not going anywhere. Plus, the loving warmth radiating off her from their embrace was comforting.

He could still see her face from that night—the look of fear when he was pushed in front of Sarah, forcing her to choose a world she doesn’t want to be a part of, the feeling of her small and shaky hand tightly holding his. The look of hurt and pleading as Erica shoved her out of the way to drink from him herself, and the betrayal as Erica bit down hard into his neck, draining him of his blood and replacing it with the venom that would soon change him from mortal to creature of the night. Even while fading in and out of consciousness, he was somehow acutely aware of her quickening heartbeat and her frantic breathing as chaos erupted as the rescue party began fighting for their lives. He swore he saw tear drops spilling from her eyes as she fought through the chaos, struggling to reach him, only fully leaving once Jesse reassured her that they’d be okay. And even then, Erica’s relationship with both her and Sarah has become strained, and Rory didn’t blame them.

While Erica’s new bad girl attitude was hot as fluff, he didn’t miss the fact it was also problematic. The new Erica was far from the sweet-hearted Dusk fangirl who would give anyone the time of day with a sweet smile and good-natured spirit.

“I guess what they say is true.” He thought as Dakota adjusted herself to a more comfortable position. “Absolute power corrupts absolutely."

“Did, did it hurt?” Dakota muttered, now burying her head into the crook of Rory’s neck, the tips of his curled hair tickling her cheek.

“What?” He asked as his friend untangled herself from Rory’s grasp to properly face him. “Did it hurt when Erica bit you?”

“Not really,” he tried to recall. “I mean, yeah, the fangs piercing into my neck was shocking, but I wouldn’t say it was excruciating or unbearable; it was oddly pleasurable.”

“Oddly pleasurable, how?”

“Well, like that girl who gave me that wicked hicky shortly before you found me.”

“Do you have a biting kink?” Dakota wondered, raising an eyebrow,

“Depends, would that trigger your sex repulsed side?”

“Yes.” She spoke simply and sternly.

“Then never mind.” He shook his head, and Dakota decided to drop the topic, laying her head back down on Rory’s chest, who began absentmindedly stroking her head.

“What were you like before? Like, what were your day-to-day actions as a human?”

“Well…” Rory had to think for a moment while it hasn’t been too long since he turned; it has been a while since he had to consciously think about his mundane routine.

“To be fair, I wouldn’t say my life was anything special, at least not like yours. I woke up, went to school with Benny and Ethan, went to class, and then went back home for dinner, homework, video games, and listened to music while I relaxed and fell asleep. wake up, and the cycle repeats. Up until recently, it was the most boring and uninteresting life I ever lived. But not a bad one; compared to you, mine isn’t anything worth writing home about.

But Dakota couldn’t disagree more as she shook her head. “At least you had a life. Sure, I’m the most extraordinary girl you’ll ever meet; I get that a lot, but you were human; you aged, lived, breathed, and slept. Now you can’t age; everyone around you will grow old and die, and you’ll be living till the end of the world, and even then, I doubt you’ll be able to move onto the afterlife; you’re basically a soulless demon. With a heart of gold to match, of course.” She added to lighten the mood,

And Rory understood, yes, there were sadly drawbacks to being immortal and all-powerful. He no longer slept as much or as deep as he used to, not to mention yes, he no longer aged; his best friends and his parents will grow old and die one by one, and he’ll stay forever young, forced to wander the earth in a cursed ageless body that is difficult to kill and easy to resurrect, or at least according to Jesse. He didn’t know how true that statement was, considering how cocky and manipulative he was.

“It’s true becoming a vampire has changed my life for better and for worse yet. Who’s to say it will stay this way?"

“What?” Dakota shot up, eyes wide.

“Well, who’s to say that in a few years I’ll change my mind and want to become human again? If there is a cure for vampirism, it’s bound to be found eventually. I mean, we’re already searching high and low for Sarah. Maybe I’ll be the one to test it to see if it works.”

“You’ll give up your immortality for us?"

He nodded. “Well, Erica won’t do it, nor will any other vampire; they’re too old; they’ll just shrivel up and turn to dust. And besides, I like you a lot, Dakota. If something happens and we start dating, that’ll place you at an unfair crossroad. I don’t want to make the same mistake Jesse made. I don’t want you to choose if you don’t want to. Not to mention the vampire counsel is against humans dating vampires, so there’s another issue. It’s a long and complicated procedure that I don’t want you caught up in; you’re too kind to be put under all that stress and pressure, and I’m willing to sacrifice my immortality and all the awesome perks that came with it just so we can live peacefully.”

“R-Rory, I I had no idea I meant that much to you.” She smiled, trying to blink back her tears and failing. "

“Well,” He chuckled. “If I don't, Emily will surely kill me. Not to mention… Hey, are you okay?” He asked, seeing her smiling, tear-stained face looking up at him.

Dakota, feeling too choked up to respond, flung her arms around the older teen, rubbing her check against his, leaning in, and whispered a phrase that made his heart melt. With that, the two melted into comfortable silence once more.

“I love you, Rory.”

#mbav #mbav stuff #rory keaner #my babysitters a vampire #my babysitter's a vampire #fanfiction #dakota natalie #mbav fanfic #day 2 #pre vamp #roryweek #roryweek2023

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wolfcursd · 1 year

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[ logan lerman, twenty nine, cis man ]. you’ll never guess who i saw in stanley park. that’s right, it was [ isaac brenner ]. [ he/him ] is a [ photographer at vancouver sun ] and they’re apparently a [ werewolf ]. did you hear they are [ humorous & adaptable ] but also [ distant & pessimistic ]? no wonder, anyone who reminds me of [ never knowing how to be on time, always warm to the touch, a soft voice never knowing what quite to say ] is sure to give that impression.

first.

full name: isaac samuel brenner.

age: twenty nine.

gender + pronouns: cis man + he/him.

orientation: bisexual.

occupation: photographer at vancouver sun.

species: werewolf.

character inspos: oz from buffy, shaggy rogers from scooby doo, & peter parker from spiderman.

second.

grew up in michigan with his parents and two siblings. parents got divorced while isaac was in high school but he has never particularly been close with either of them so it didn't impact him much. he always wanted to be closer to his family but isaac has never been good at sharing his feelings.

has been living in vancouver for a few years now. he moved to the area after dropping out of grad school and the desire to start fresh somewhere he couldn't possibly know anyone. with a bachelors in history under his belt, a couple hundred dollars to his name and nothing to lose, he went north. it was the federally regulated weed that really swayed his choice.

was bitten a few months ago and is unaware of his species status. has woken up in some pretty strange places, but as someone familiar with alcoholic benders, he never really thought much into it. while isaac isn't aware of every single supernatural detail, he's not quite at the "believing" part but he's certainly at the "something not normal is going on" part. wants to be left out of it altogether if possible but his job usually puts him in the right place at the wrong time. it's how he'd gotten bitten, been somewhere for work and some guy he was trying to help just bit him.

pretty chill and has a good heart but tries to avoid being someone with responsibilities or expectations. isaac doesn't like to rock the boat and when things get tough, he usually just leaves the situation for someone else to deal with. spends a lot of his time practicing his drums ( his apartment neighbors want him dead ), going on errands for the newspaper, and not being sober. really used to love the idea of leaving the us but now he wonders if he should leave again because there's just too much going on for his taste.

third.

desired plots: ( feel free to toss ideas my way )

roommate. taken by bowie . isaac has been living in apartments ever since moving to vancouver - it's possible this is someone he's been roommates with for years or someone he's moved in with recently. as much as he likes being alone, he also likes having a savings account.

ex partner. maybe they were dating soon after isaac moved to canada or maybe they broke up more recently. could have been mutual, could have been on isaac's part, could have been on their's. just fun ex drama.

one night stand, friends, acquaintances, etc.

#slayerhqs : intro

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bluhours · 2 years

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* @shutdwnn alexa play sweet dreams by tomorrow x together

* the holidays are always stressful, that can certainly be said for any family under the sun — but when you have a close knit family of eight, plus nieces and nephews and significant others, the house in bedford park can get cramped rather quickly. matt is used to it, and takes it all in stride ; this is his home, his family, the very walls that raised him, despite the flames of chaos him and august were engulfed in the moment they stepped through the door.

* he didn’t want august to get overwhelmed, despite knowing just how much his family truly was, but he should’ve known that was a pipe dream in of itself. they were showered with love as soon as they stepped into the front door, mary the first to greet them and welcoming them into the warmth of matt’s childhood home — taking august’s coat and not even as much batting an eye at the designer fabric in her hands. she hung it up with everything else, beside the bright pink puffer jacket that belonged to matt’s youngest sister — here, august was one of them. before matt could even blink, she had swept august away into the kitchen, where she offered him drinks and snacks as dinner continued to sizzle away on the stove, matt’s oldest brother tending to whatever was in the pan.

* a tight smile plasters itself to matt’s face as he swoops in, trying to save august from the loving claws of his mother. she was full of warmth more than matt was, and he wasn’t going to let august be subjected to that before they could even sit down — though matthew supposes that the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. ❝ momma, ❞ there is a hint of warning in matt’s tone, giving her a look that silently tells her to dial it back before august goes fleeing out the front door. ❝ my apologies, matt has told us so much about you, august — it’s nice to finally put a name to the face. ❞ as if his face isn’t plastered up everywhere. canada’s prince, one of the biggest names in hollywood — and he’s HERE, in the kitchen where matt found out he was going to university, where he broke down and came out to his mom almost a decade ago, where all of his siblings heights have been notched into the doorframe in various markers ; he’s here as a part of matt’s home, to make his own memories in one of the most precious places to matthew’s heart. to be a part of it.

* fingers entwine gently through august’s as he leads him into the living room, dodging the wrestling match that surely would’ve ensued if he lingered any longer with his brother. ❝ i’m sorry, everybody’s really excited to finally meet you in person. ❞ stopping in front of the tree and inspecting his mother’s work on the decorations, matt smiles as he looks at hand - made ornaments from each of the choi siblings from various years. ❝ you’re the, uh . . . you’re the first person i’ve brought back to meet my family in a long time. ❞ since malcolm, is what remains unsaid. ❝ they can all be a bit much but, this is home. i know it’s not giselle calabrese’s christmas party or anything like that, but my dad makes a mean bulgogi. and the company is always nice. i don’t get to be home as much as i used to anymore, so i’m really glad you came with me. ❞ bumping his shoulder against august’s, a warm smile has teased the corner’s of matthew’s lips. ❝ i hope it holds up in your eyes. ❞

#AURRRRRRRRRRRRGH #I HOPE I CHOKE AND DIE AND THEN DIE AGAIN

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luci-in-trenchcoats · 3 years

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If I Fell For You (Part 9) - Inner Demons

Summary: The reader meets Gen for the first time while the boys are having a day together. But when they come home early and Jensen overhears the reader, a very big discussion about what they both expect out of their relationship has to happen...

Masterlist

Pairing: Jensen x nanny!reader

Square: Skinny Dipping

Word Count: 5,100ish

Warnings: mature (language, skinny dipping, implied future smut, angst, self-doubt)

A/N: Please enjoy! Also written for @spnkinkbingo

________

“No,” whined Zeppelin as Jensen carried him out of the bedroom for the third time that night. “Daddy, I want to sleep with you.”

“Zeppelin. You gotta be a big boy and go to sleep. It’s midnight and way, way past bedtime,” said Jensen. He started to cry loudly and Jensen set him down. “Do you want a time out? I’ll give you one first thing in the morning if you don’t behave.”

He ran over to you and grabbed your leg, burying his face in it. Jensen sighed, tired after a long day and you knew he needed some sleep. You squatted down and Zeppelin grabbed at you, shaking a bit. You frowned, Jensen catching it as you picked up the little boy.

“He can stay,” you said. Jensen made a face but you carried him into the room, Jensen grumbling to himself. You let Zeppelin crawl into the middle and immediately grab his father when Jensen got under the covers. He was asleep quickly, Jensen kissing the top of his head. “He’s scared.”

“He had a tantrum. He’s four,” whispered Jensen. “He needs to sleep on his own or he gets dependent.”

“You’re his father. He’s already dependent,” you whispered. “He’s a little you.”

“What’s that mean?”

“It means he missed his daddy and he has been the one telling his sisters for three weeks daddy’s coming home soon. I don’t care if he sleeps in our bed, Jensen. Sometimes he has to be a big boy but not tonight.”

“He was very...he’s very much me,” he said quietly, fixing the blankets over his son. “He’s in tune with other’s emotions.”

“I know,” you said. “He’s a sweet boy.”

“When I was a kid, around seven or so, my dad went out to LA for about two months for work. We didn’t have the money for him to fly back and forth so he drove out there. He would call every night but it was long distance and it was expensive back then so all I got to do was say hi to him really. Somewhere in the middle of the two months he drove back to visit for a weekend. I was so excited. So, so excited. I was gonna tell him all about school and my baseball games and the jumping contest my brother and I had on the swings. I was so pumped. He said he was gonna be there Saturday morning for breakfast. Well, I wake up, run downstairs, he’s not there. Lunch rolls around, he’s not there. Afternoon snack time rolls around…”

“He’s not there?” you asked, Jensen nodding. “What happened?”

“Never left LA. Got in a car accident. He was fine but this was the eighties and my mom didn’t get a phone call until the afternoon saying he wouldn’t be coming home. I thought a hundred million things in my head of why he wasn’t there. That achy pit in your stomach. When he finally came home a month later, I slept in their room, in their bed. That little achy feeling went away after that night. I know how much he’s like me,” he said, lightly running his fingers over Zeppelin’s head. “But I gave him that part of me too and I wish I hadn’t.”

“Why?”

“Because he’s too little to worry about me.”

“He’s okay and he’s not gonna worry after tonight. But Jensen, there’s nothing wrong with him having that part of you. It’s a really good part, the part that loves the people he cares about. Right now he doesn’t understand it but someday he will and that’s going to make him a person people will be fortunate to have in their lives. That’s a great part of you he got.”

“Just have to go and make me feel better, don’t you,” he said softly. He closed his eyes and smiled. “Think I’m doing an okay job at this?”

“Yup,” you said. Zeppelin turned over in his sleep, smashing his face into your arm.

“You care for them,” said Jensen. You nodded and he burrowed down into the sheets. “Because of me or your job?”

“It always helps the job,” you said. “When you nanny, you want the kids to feel comfortable with you and caring about them always makes that easier. But I don’t...I don’t like them because I decided I liked their dad, you know?”

“Why did you then?”

“People with money sometimes let their children get raised by that money and you can tell when it happens. But it’s so obvious that doesn’t happen with them. They have nice toys and clothes and things but they’re good and funny and smart and they could very easily be brats if you went the easy route but you didn’t and it just shows. Sure they’re kids and they can drive anyone to the brink of insanity at times, but they got big hearts, especially for dad. I just like them and seeing them grow into those people more every day.”

“Me too,” he said, Zeppelin rolling back, fisting his hands into Jensen’s shirt this time. He smiled and you leaned over, kissing him goodnight, pecking one on Zeppelin’s head. “Night.”

“Night Jensen.”

The next afternoon when you arrived at Jared’s house you weren’t sure what you were expecting. Jared and Jensen were off doing who knew what and you felt like you’d been set up on a playdate yourself. You’d dropped off the kids there more than once already and knew their kids but for some reason or other you’d yet to meet Gen. You swallowed as you followed the kids around the side of the house, the three of them taking off to go play with their friends on a swing set. You looked around and bit your bottom lip, fixing your bag over your shoulder.

“Y/N?” called a voice. You turned and saw a woman behind you, a bit sweaty in some workout clothes. “Hey. I’m Gen. Nice to finally meet you.”

“Thanks. You too,” you said.

“Come on,” she said, waving you to follow her up some steps to a patio. “Tom! JJ!”

“We know!” they shouted back from the swings. She shook her head and sighed.

“Not that any of the little ones can get over to the pool anyways but I want to remind them to keep an eye on the younger ones when I’m inside,” she said, showing you to a patio door. You followed her inside, Gen walking into a kitchen and going straight to the fridge, pulling out a bottle of cold water.

“They have hair like their dad,” you said.

“Yes, yes they do. Getting them to get a haircut is like herding cats,” she said. She gulped down her water and let out a deep breath. “Do you mind if I shower quick? Time got away from me.”

“Yeah, no problem,” you said.

“There’s a bathroom right around the corner there. Feel free to take whatever from the kitchen if you want. I’ll be back in ten,” she said.

“No problem,” you said. When she was upstairs you went back outside, leaving your bag in a patio chair. You went down the steps and watched the kids running around for a moment before exploring their backyard. “Here I thought your backyard was nice Ackles.”

“Y/N, will you play tag with us?” asked Arrow from over in the grass.

“How could I say no to a face like that?”

Fifteen minutes later you were warm and taking a break under the patio again out of the sun, the kids playing on the slide and swings now.

“Remember when we had endless energy like that?” asked Gen as the back door opened.

“Barely,” you said, a margarita glass set down in front of you. “I see we’re going to be very good friends.”

“It’s so hot out today,” she said, setting a pitcher and another glass down on the table. She poured you a glass and then herself one before taking a seat beside you. “I bet the boys are out jet skiing.”

“They really are like a pair of children when you get them together,” you said.

“Yeah but it’s cute. Most people don’t ever get to have a best friend like that,” she said. “Sometimes they need their space from each other but Jared’s literally been counting down the days until Jensen gets back.”

“I don’t think Jensen will ever stay away that long again. He missed his family and friends. Home,” you said.

“We’re glad to have him back. He’s been gone for a while. Even before you went to Canada,” she said.

“Were you good friends with...” you asked, Gen nodding. “I’m sorry.”

“It sucked. Still does,” she said. “When the boys were off, we could hang out. We got very close. After the accident I was the one taking care of the kids, helping his parents and family with their day to day. Jared focused more on Jensen, helping him physically get back to normal and then mentally. But you know how he was when you met him.”

“I know a lot of work went into helping him get there. I’m very grateful he had you guys,” you said.

“Listen...I’m hoping we can be good friends too. It was different for me and Dee. We both were dating the boys around the same time, got married around the same time. I know we don’t have that and...I just hope we can have that relationship still.”

“Me too. I know we’re probably gonna be seeing you guys a lot now that neither of them are working,” you said.

“Probably most everyday,” she said. “They’re like twins separated at birth or something I swear.”

“Has Jensen always been a bit quiet?” you asked.

“Yeah. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve seen that boy drunk off his ass and being a troublemaker but he’s always been that way. Maybe it’s why he and Jared fit. They’re protective of each other in different ways. Jared’s the loud one out of the two of them, always has been and Jensen, even if he is your best fucking friend, sometimes he’s a little bit quiet.”

“I figured as much. He’s just…”

“Gentle,” she said, a smile coming to your face. “You two are pretty serious, huh.”

“Maybe.”

“It’s been five months. I’d say it’s serious. You move in yet?”

“Technically I’ve always been moved in,” you said. She laughed and took a sip of her drink. “Yeah. We’ve gotten to the sharing a room stage very recently.”

“You must be very special then,” she said. “He was never gonna fall in love ever again. Told Jared and me himself. Now he’s as lovestruck as the first time around.”

“I’m not expecting…” you said, sipping on your drink. “Don’t tell him I said that.”

“Like I said, we can be friends without the boys,” she said. “What aren’t you expecting?”

“This,” you said with a shrug. “Marriage. Kids of my own. I don’t know where it goes with Jensen.”

“You should start having those talks with him,” she said, your head shaking. “You have to, just so you’re on the same page.”

“I don’t even know if we’re reading the same book,” you said. She nodded and you slumped back into your seat. “I know I love him and that he loves me. But I don’t know if that’s enough.”

“A friend once told me that’s all you need,” said Jensen behind you. You turned around and Jensen was standing there, a sad smile on his face. “We wanted to come hang out with you guys. Y/N?”

You got a smile from Gen as you followed Jensen inside, Jared slipping past and out back. You crossed your arms and looked down, Jensen stepping close to you, large hands resting on your arms.

“Why don’t you think it’s enough?” he asked quietly.

“It is. Gen and I were just shooting the shit,” you said, forcing your gaze up. He slid his hand down and took one of yours, pulling you over to a quiet sitting room. He sat down on a day bed, you going with him.

“Honey. Tell me the truth.” He ran his thumb over the back of your hand as you crossed your legs. “Did I do something?”

“No. You’re perfect,” you said, glancing down to your lap. “All I was saying was...I don’t know where you stand on some things.”

“Like what?” he asked, still smiling softly, hiding all of the nerves underneath it.

“Kids. Marriage. The fact your family has never once met me or knows I exist. Am I just gonna be the nanny girlfriend or is there something more? I love you. I fucking love and I don’t need or want...I just want to know if you’re open to those things.”

“I don’t know,” he said. You nodded and moved your hand back into your lap, Jensen letting go of it. “Is that a deal breaker?”

“No,” you said with a shake of your head. “Like I said, we were shooting the shit.”

You were both quiet before you stood, Jensen grabbing your hand. He pulled you back to sit, plopping you straight down in his lap before kissing you.

“Okay I do know but the answers fucking scare me,” he said. “I said I was gonna stop being scared when it came to you.”

“Jensen, you don’t have to-”

“Yes, I would have more kids if it were with the right person. Preferably sooner than later but yes. Yes, I would marry again. Yes, I would introduce her to my family and yes they do know about her. Not as much as I’d like but they do know her. And lastly yes, I am open to more than just the nanny girlfriend, so much fucking more. All of it more. But that scares me that almost a year later here I am, open to all of those things, wanting those things with you when losing Dee hurt so much. It’s not fair to you that this isn’t how it’s supposed to be, simple and normal and just the fun parts. I’m sorry.”

“I’m not asking you to stop loving her. God if you ever did, I don’t think you’d be the man I love. I just wanted to know if there’s room for a future in there maybe,” you said.

“You kinda got in there all on your own and I don’t want you to ever come out,” he said.

“Ever?” you breathed out. “Cause that implies-”

“If someone’s gonna be that second person for me, I think…” he said, looking down. You rested your forehead against his, Jensen taking a deep breath. “I know you won’t wait for me forever to get my shit together.”

“Well, forever’s a long time. I can offer a few years at least?” you asked, Jensen laughing dryly. “What?”

“I don’t deserve a few years. Your emotions aren’t a toy to play with.”

“Yours aren’t something to drag along when they’re not ready.”

“See? You do that shit. You always do that fucking shit,” he said, his voice a few octaves higher. You wrapped him up in a hug, feeling a few drops of wetness hit your cheek. “I’m sorry.”

“For crying? Jesus Jens, it’s okay,” you said. “I promise it’s okay.”

“It’s not okay. I keep tossing you around like you don’t have feelings too, like this isn’t hard for you too. It’s always me and my fucking problems with just…”

“Just what honey,” you said, Jensen holding onto you tightly, chin resting on your shoulder.

“I can’t,” he said.

“Why not?” you said, carding your fingers through his hair.

“I don’t want this to go away,” he mumbled out. “This is it and I feel like I’m gonna explode and-”

“Shush,” you said, wrapping your legs around his waist and squeezing his whole body as much as you could. He stilled briefly and calmed down some, sniffling to himself before you released to a gentler hold on him. “Just the anxiety talking.”

“I love you,” he said, lifting his head up, looking you straight on. “I want to marry you. I want to have kids with you and do everything with you. I’ve known those things for a very long time. Longer than you have and before you even thought of them as questions. I want all that and you’re gonna get stuck with me, with this, with the never ending baggage, with the baggage you haven’t even seen yet. All your life is gonna be is taking care of my ass and you getting hurt because of it. Is that what you want? Is it? Because I want so much fucking more for you than me.”

“Was that your proposal speech?” you asked calmly. He blinked a few times and narrowed his eyes.

“What? Y/N I-”

“Well you said you want to marry me and yeah, I fucking want to do that with you too so was that your speech?”

“What?” he asked so innocently you smiled. “I don’t…”

“I happen to like taking care of your ass. So. You want me gone, I’m gone. You want me to stay, I’m staying forever. What’s it gonna be?” you asked.

“Stay,” he said quietly with a nod. “Please don’t go away from us.”

“Okay,” you said. He leaned forward and kissed you, sniffling some more when he broke off. “Are you…”

“I can’t believe I just asked that while I’m covered in tears and snot,” he said. A box of tissues suddenly flung itself through the doorway, landing near your feet. You stared down at it and started to laugh, Jensen chuckling while you picked it up. “I’m never living that down.”

“Who gives a fuck,” you said. You took out a tissue and wiped off his face and eyes, having him blow his nose a few times. “That’s really gross.”

“I know.”

“Must be how you know it’s meant to be,” you said, wiping your hand off.

“Stay forever?” he asked.

“Yeah,” you said quietly. “Yeah that sounds good.”

“Me too,” he said. He pulled you into a hug and you held him tight, the door sneakily shutting on the two of you when it started to pour outside and you heard the backdoor. “I bet that’s how you imagined that going.”

“I never thought it would happen,” you said. “Not when I first came here. Love’s for other people. Normal people with normal families.”

“Fuck normal,” he said and you laughed. You picked up a clean tissue and licked it, wiping off a dried tear streak on his cheek. “I feel good.”

“We’re gonna work on that bottling shit up stuff, okay?” you said.

“Maybe you’ll have more success than Dee did,” he chuckled.

“I’ll just have to build off what she started,” you said. He nodded and cupped your cheek as you finished cleaning him off. “There, all better.”

“Guess you’re out of a nanny job,” he said.

“Oh such a shame,” you said. “I’ve been putting my paychecks for the last while to a separate account.”

“I did notice that,” he said. “Saving for something?”

“Wanted to give it back to you.”

“Honeymoon fund instead?”

“Okay, now we’re talking,” you said with a laugh.

“You never did tell me how much your book deal got you.”

“I signed a multi-year deal. They think there’s great potential for it to be one of those series every kid reads. One million for around twenty books?”

“Fuck. You should be my agent if you can negotiate like that,” he said.

“I’m still gonna take care of them like I have been,” you said.

“I know. It’s probably going to be a million times harder now actually,” he said. You nodded and he smiled. “You love them.”

“Yes but I don’t know how to be a parent.”

“Just do what you’ve been doing and it’ll be fine,” he said. “It’ll change but it’ll be good.”

“Not really how I was expecting today to go,” you said.

“Me either. I had hoped for that to be a tad more romantic,” he said. You gave him a kiss and hug, Jensen returning it. “You don’t care.”

“Nah,” you said. “Just care about you. Everything else, I’m good.”

“Want to go share the news with our eavesdropper?” he asked. You helped him up to his feet and took his hand, walking out of the room, Jared and Gen suspiciously wiping down their kitchen counter. “Or should I say eavesdroppers.”

“We were concerned and I swear we left after Jared tossed the tissues in,” said Gen. Jared shook his head and pointed at her. “I swear he did it.”

“Guess you guys heard then,” said Jensen, giving you a smile. “We’re gonna give it a shot.”

“You okay?” asked Jared. Jensen nodded and squeezed your hand. “You sure?”

“I know what I want,” said Jensen. “I’ve known for a long time. Finally got over being scared is all.”

“She wasn’t gonna hurt you,” said Jared with a smile.

“I know. It was a different fear,” he said.

“I’m not going anywhere,” you said. “Promise.”

“You better not, sweetheart.”

It was dark by the time the storms had passed, all three kids going down easy after spending most of the day running around the Padalecki house. You sat on the balcony off of Jensen’s bedroom in the oversized lounge chair, Jensen sat on the other side of the small side table your drink rested on.

“I’ve never been on a boat before,” you said, staring up at the dark night sky, the only light coming from a few string ones Jensen had turned on.

“Never?” asked Jensen. “Better wear your life jacket tomorrow then.”

“You better wear your life jacket,” you said. “We both know I’m a better swimmer than you.”

“You’re a better swimmer than me? Me?” he chuckled. “No way.”

“Put your money where your mouth is. Five bucks says I’m a better swimmer,” you said. He waved the way towards the door and you stood up, walking downstairs and outside.

“Uh, you missing something?” he chuckled. You smirked and pulled off your shirt and undid your jeans, shimming out of them and leaving them by the patio. “You really think…”

“I really think what?” you said, tossing your bra at him, leaving your underwear behind. You jumped in and swam out to the deep end. “You’re already losing Jensen.”

“Losing my ass,” he said, taking off his shirt and jeans, nearly tripping as he hopped out of his boxer briefs. He jumped in nearby and swam over to you, dunking his head under briefly. “I could get used to this look.”

“Nothing you’ve not seen before.”

“Never seen my fiance naked before,” he grinned. You rolled your eyes but swam over and gave him a kiss. “I knew you had a thing for dorks you know.”

“Did you now?”

“Told me yourself. Not a fan of cocky guys I recall.”

“Well...a little cock is okay. Highly recommended in fact,” you said.

“You are such a loser,” he laughed.

“I must have learned it from you.” You giggled and swam back to the shallow end, Jensen lazily chasing after. “I’ve never skinny dipped until just now actually.”

“Got anything on your bucket list you want to try out?” he asked. You shrugged and took a seat on a step, Jensen settling in next to you. “Naked trounce on the trampoline?”

“Maybe another time,” you said. You leaned back and looked up at the dark sky once more. He reached over and held your hand in the water, playing with it quietly. “Skydiving would be cool. Space would be cool.”

“One of those is a lot more feasible than the other. I noticed up in Canada where we had more stars at night you really like looking at them.”

“Did it a lot as a kid. Kinda always have,” you said. “I like space as much as the next gal but it’s just pretty, you know? You’re one little speck out in all of those stars. It’s all so freaking complex but you can kinda look up at them and it’s just so simple too.”

“Yeah,” he said, toying with a strand of hair floating in the water. “I get that.”

You turned and found him staring at you, a smile on his lips.

“We could go camping sometime, see all the stars there are up there if you’d like,” he said.

“We don’t have to do that,” you said.

“Why?” he asked quietly. “I’m curious is all. It seems like something you’d really enjoy seeing.”

“What purpose does it serve though? It’s not something fun for the kids to experience,” you said. “It’s a waste of money.”

“It doesn’t have to have a purpose. It’s for you, for us. A night away where you get to see something most people don’t ever get a chance. That’s the only purpose,” he said. “Camping’s about the cheapest thing you can do. Don’t worry about the money. You don’t have to worry about that ever again.”

“I just don’t want to go camping,” you said. You looked down and swallowed. “I used to go camping with my dad a lot.”

“Oh. I’m sorry.”

“You didn’t do that to me,” you said. “I just...I don’t think I ever want to go again.”

“Okay. Would you go camping with me sometime?” he asked.

“Jensen-”

“Just me. No body else. I won’t even touch you except to cuddle,” he said. You nodded and he smiled. “Thank you. It won’t be scary this time. I promise.”

“Is your dad nice?” you asked. He leaned back against his elbows and nodded. “Does he know about me?”

“My parents know I have a girlfriend. My mom knows I was getting pretty serious about you,” he said.

“Do they know I was the nanny? Or how old I am?”

“No. My siblings do but not my parents,” he said. You sat up and wrapped your arms around yourself in the warm night air. “I’m not embarrassed of you Y/N. I think that’s a conversation better had in person is all.”

“You haven’t told them because you think they’ll have a problem with it,” you said.

“Not as much problem as when I say I’m not having a prenup,” he said. You turned your head and saw him smiling back. “I wouldn’t be doing this if I didn’t trust you completely.”

“Jensen I don’t want to cause a problem,” you said. He shook his head and you sighed. “I know how close you are with them and you haven’t gotten to see them since Christmas. I know exactly what they’re gonna think of me when they hear about the former nanny.”

“You don’t seem to understand yet that you? Nobody is more important than you and those three in there. If they can’t accept you then screw ‘em.”

“Jensen.”

“I’m not worried and you know why? I love you and you love me. I know they love me a whole lot too so you’re on the same side.”

“You’re a bad liar,” you said. He sat up and sighed. “Jens-”

“I don’t know how they’ll act. But you deserve a chance and that’s what I expect out of them. I want them to love you too but at a minimum you’ll have their respect.”

You nodded and sunk down in the warm water, Jensen sliding over and taking a seat on your lap, tossing his arms around your shoulders.

“You still talk to Dee’s parents right?” you asked. He nodded and wrapped his legs loosely around your waist. “Do they…”

“No,” he said quietly. “They deserve for that to be an in person conversation too. They’re coming up soon for JJ’s birthday soon. I figured I’d tell them then.”

“I’m glad you still talk to them,” you said. “They still see you guys.”

“Christmas was hard last year. I’m not sure which one of us got it worse,” he said.

“I’d like to meet them if that’s okay.”

“Yeah,” he breathed out. “I’m not sure how they’ll react honestly.”

“I’d still like to,” you said, stepping out into the water with him, Jensen hanging off of you. “If only you were this light normally I’d carry you around all day.”

“Didn’t we agree a long time ago you were the badass princess after all,” he said, bumping his nose against yours.

“Here I thought you’d be taller,” you teased, quickly kissing him.

“Little shit,” he grinned. He nuzzled your cheek and you let out a deep breath. “Don’t worry about them.”

“At least we don’t have to go through this on my side,” you said.

“Can I ask one thing of you?”

“What?”

“Ray, your mom’s boyfriend, did things end badly between the two of you or you just drift apart? You said you left when you finished high school.”

“I stopped talking to him awhile ago. I moved out at 18 when I got my first nanny job. He was dating his wife Sarah by then. I’d come over for dinner every few months for a few years. By the time I was twenty one they were married with two kids. I didn’t go one time and kept putting it off and Ray told me it was okay if I didn’t want to see him anymore. I could call him if I ever needed him, that sort of thing. I haven’t spoken to him in nine years. But that’s not asking something of me, is it.”

“Can we consider inviting him to the wedding?”

“Been engaged eight hours and already planning?” you asked.

“I don’t know him but he had a part in raising you. Just consider it is all I ask. And wedding? Those things take fucking forever to plan, trust me.”

“I’ll think about it,” you said, spinning him around in the water. “Are they really that complicated to put together?”

“Nah. Don’t go bridezilla on me is all,” he said.

“Total diva over here,” you said, feeling the edge of the shallow end start to drop off with your foot. You spun around one more time before you had to set him down, Jensen taking the chance to pick you up and toss you out of of the water. “Jensen! I’m naked!”

“I know. It’s awesome,” he said, swimming out and kissing your cheek. “Wanna race?”

“Winner gets to do whatever they want to the loser when we head upstairs?” you grinned.

“Oh, you’re so on.”

______

A/N: Read Part 10 here!

#spnkinkbingo #supernatural #spn #jensen x reader #jensen ackles #jensen ackles au #rpf #jensen series #rpf series #jensen ackles x reader #spn fanfic #jensen ackles fanfic #supernatural fanfic

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undyingskies · 4 years

Text

Big Bear

request: no

a/n: i hope you guys like this one, i truthfully have no idea how i feel about it but that is okay. i just had the idea and finally found some motivation to write so i did.

Quick reminder too, i have my request closed for the time being as i am struggling a bit with writers block and motivation! i have my inbox open to be able to still talk and interact with everyone but i am hoping to shave down my request list a little more before i open it up again! i hope everyone understands, i should have it open by the end of this upcoming week!

warnings: none

tagged: @mah-gah-lee

word count: 2.7k

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Come with us to Big Bear they said, it will be fun they said.

And it was fun in the beginning, when you guys first got to the mountain. The day started off with everyone joking around and shot gunning a few drinks. Your small group of friends, meeting other small groups of friends. It was fun.

But then, the snowboarding began. And they were wrong, it was not fun anymore. It may have been fun to watch the mess you were trying to snowboard down the mountain but instead of making it down the mountain you just ended up face down in the snow.

Either way, it wasn’t fun for you. But everyone was getting a good laugh at you.

“Come on Y/N, let’s go up one more time!”

You look at your friend, giving them the most pointed eye you could muster. All of them laughing at your look.

“No. Not happening.”

“Come on please! This could be your lucky slope, besides we’re getting lunch after.”

You let the idea roll around in your head, trying to pin point the positive and negatives of going again. While there were many negatives, at this point you’ve fallen enough, what is one more time you think.

“Fine, I’ll go.” The frustration evident coming from you.

“Yes! Atta girl, let’s get going then.” With that your hand is in your friends and they are pulling you up onto your feet.

You trudge behind them, making your way to the lift. You and your friends are just alone waiting for your turn, listening to the laughter of the group in front of you.

“Dude all I’m saying is it’s weird that you’re wearing a mask with hulu girls on it when we’re in the snow!” The loud voice of the guy in front of you making both you and your friends giggle.

Your giggles getting the attention of the boys and girl in front of you. Their eyes all on you. Your giggling immediately stops, but escapes again when you see the mask in question.

“See dude! Even they agree!” The boy laughs at his friends. “I told you it’s a weird mask!”

“It is not, I got it in Hawaii! I thought it was fun!” The one boy whines out, taking being the brunt of the joke well though.

“I don’t think it’s as fun as you think, how about you ask miss giggles over there!” The same male voice says again, causing your eyes to widen. You weren’t ready to be put on the spot.

They all stare at you for a few seconds, you’re still in shock at their attention.

“Well?” The boy with the mask asks.

“I mean it’s not, not fun; but it also looks like one of my grandpa’s shirts.” You confess, your words making everyone laugh.

“See dude!”

“That’s not fair!”

“It totally looks like a grandpa shirt!”

The group of friends all begin saying at the same time, laughing at the truth your words held. The boy in the mask looks at you and says “thanks a lot.”

You smile at his words and interject back, “You wanted the strangers opinion.” Now the both of you laugh as well.

The time you had to wait for the lift went by quickly due to your interactions with the group in front of you. They hop on the lift in front of you and you can still hear their laughter as you make your way up the hill.

You can feel your nerves set in as you get closer to hopping off the lift, you would much rather not fall flat on your face this time around.

You start hyping yourself up in your head, “you got this Y/N. You can do it.” The hyping up seems to work as you feel your nerves start to diminish.

Then it’s your turn to hop off, your friend looking over at you smiling.

“Ready Y/N?”

“Ready as I’ll ever be.”

And with that your board has hit the fresh snow and you’re lunging yourself off the seat.

You’re able to steady yourself as you’re going down the hill, you’re able to slice back and forth through the snow.

You can feel the smile make its way onto your face, and your laughter leave you. It felt so good to make your way down the mountain. You could hear your friends behind you, wooing in excitement.

All of you got excited too soon, because just as you were about to make it to the bottom of the mountain, something happened and you felt your feet fly into the air.

Next thing you know you’re face first in the snow. Again.

You just continue to lay there, face first in the snow, not wanting to move yet. Just letting whatever emotion you were feeling in this moment settle in you.

You can hear another board ride up next to you and stop when it reached your body. Neither of you say a word, instead a hand starts to poke your back.

You groan. “Just leave me here to die Y/F/N. Let the cold snow, swallow me up.”

A laugh leaves the body above you, it definitely didn’t belong to your friend. First of all it belonged to a man.

You immediately pick your head up and look at the person in front of you.

“Oh look it’s mask boy again.” Then you let your face plop back into the snow, not wanting to face the embarrassment in front of a stranger.

“Oh come on, let me help you up.” The boy is laughing again, reaching out to grab your hand to pull you up.

You look up again at the boy, this time letting him help you up.

Once you’re back on your feet, you’re wiping the snow off the front of your body. The boy and you both just letting the silence overtake you.

“Well, thanks mask boy.” You say awkwardly, not knowing what to do anymore.

The boy chuckles at your words. “I have a name you know, as much as I love the nickname.”

You point your eyes at the boy again, not understanding what he’s getting at.

“It’s Charlie.” As he speaks, he puts his hand out to let you shake. You take his hand in yours.

“Y/N.” As you say your name the boy takes his hand back and goes to move the goggles that covered his eyes and the mask that covered his face off.

You feel your breath hitch in your throat at the sight of the boy, you had just made fun of minutes before. He has to be the most handsome guy, you had ever set your eyes on.

You feel your cheeks heat up with embarrassment for a number of reasons. You’re just awkwardly standing there with your mouth slightly agape, your words getting lost in your throat.

“You okay Y/N?” You just heard your name leave his mouth but you never wanted it to end. A chuckle leaves his lips at the sight in front of him.

“Uh ya, super.” You say, now removing your own goggles and mask, needing the fresh air. “I, uhh, I am sorry about earlier I didn’t mean to poke fun at you in front of your friends.”

What you didn’t know is that, Charlie’s heart skipped a beat at the first real sight of your face. The color swirling in your eyes, the pink tint on your cheeks, and the smile on your face all had him holding his breath in.

A similar pink tint making its way onto his cheeks.

“It’s not a problem, Y/N. It was funny anyways.” He admits.

“So you’re okay? That did seem like a solid fall!” Your cheeks flushing a deeper red at his words.

“Wasn’t the first time today,” you laugh, “besides that one didn’t hurt as bad as the others.”

His face falls at your words.

“Oh no,” you laugh at the look on his face, “I have like two left feet, I’m fine!”

You try to convince him, but it doesn’t look like he’s buying it. Which could be because of the strained look on your face due to the pounding in your head.

“Fine, I have a headache.” You admit just because of the look on his face. It was intimidating but once you admitted it a chuckle left him.

“That wasn’t hard to get that out of you.” You shrug your shoulders, it really wasn’t. “If you want to come with me inside, I’ll get you something to drink and some medicine.”

As nice as his offer sounds, you can’t help but be hesitant.

“How don’t I know this isn’t some ploy to get me alone and kill me?” A loud chuckle leaves him.

“That is a fair point Y/N, but would a guy with a grandpa shirt as a mask really be able to pull something like that off?”

This time you’re the one laughing loudly.

“Also a fair point Charlie.” He smiles as your words.

He reaches his hand out to you. You look at his hand then back up at him a few times.

“With your two left feet, you’re going to need some help getting to the bottom.”

You roll your eyes at his words and take his hand with a huff, letting him lead you down the rest of the mountain. This time you don’t fall.

“How are you so good at this?” You let the words leave your mouth before you can think about it. He chuckles at how blatant you are.

“I’m actually from Canada so snow boarding was a common activity in my life.”

“Oh cool.”

The both of you reach the bottom of the mountain, you except him to drop your hand but he doesn’t.

He continues to lead you to inside the resort. You pass your friends as he pulls you inside, all of them looking at you with shocked faces and giving you thumbs up.

They had witnessed the whole event from the bottom of the mountain and were in shock at the handsome boy once they caught sight of him.

You laugh quietly at their antics. Charlie looks back at you after hearing your laughter but just smiles at you.

He continues to lead you inside until he is pushing you to sit in a chair and leaves you alone with a, “one second.”

As you sit alone, you take the rest of the bulky snow clothes off. The heat from the resort making it impossible to sit in the warm clothing.

Charlie comes back up to you smiling, giving you a once over, until he is pulled back to reality and handing you the pain killers and a water bottle.

You take them from his hand gratefully. As you swallow down the pills, he goes to sit in the chair next to you following your lead of stripping of the bulky clothes.

You feel yourself gulp a little harder as he is just left in a tight long sleeve and pulling his beanie off to run his hand through his brunette hair before pulling it back on.

He was a sight to see.

He catches you staring and smiles at you. His heart skipping another beat.

“So Y/N, what possessed you to snowboard with two left feet?” The both of you laugh at his words.

“Well first of all I didn’t know I had two left feet before I got here today and second of all my friends thought it would be a fun get away for the weekend.” The two sit in silence just smiling at one another before you break it, “what brought you here?”

“Oh, uh, kind of the same thing! My friends thought it would be fun to come up here for the weekend and I’ll never turn down an adventure.”

From there your conversation explodes. Neither of you wanting it to end. It was nice getting to know each other, with every word your interest for one another growing.

The only thing that pulls you from the conversation is the darkness taking over the sky and your phone buzzing from texts from your friends asking you where you were and demanding to know what was happening with the “cute boy who watched you fall on your face.” Their words not yours.

You quickly shoot them a text back letting them know you’d leave now and would fill them in with details once you get back to the cabin.

“It looks like I’ve got to go, but it was nice meeting you Charlie” You smile, while standing on your feet. Charlie’s face falls at your words but follows your lead as he stands up and looks at his watch. Sighing at the time, it was getting late.

“Would it be okay if I walked you back to where ever you’re staying?” He pauses as you think about his offer, “It is dark outside and what kind of guy would I be if I let you go alone.”

“Another fair point, Charlie. I’d appreciate it actually.” He smiles at your words and grabs both of your snowboards even though you try to protest but he just shushes you.

It is honestly impressive how the boy was able to carry both boards under one arm, his muscles popping out. His free hand reaches out to yours and he entangles your fingers.

You just smile at him, as you begin to lead the way to where you were staying.

“So how long as you staying?” You ask him as you walk down the street that leads to your cabin.

“We’re here until Sunday, so two more days! You?”

“Oh, same!” The both of you smile at each other.

The last few feet to your cabin is just spent in silence. The both of you thinking the same things but too nervous to say anything.

You continue to lead him up to your cabin before you stop in front of your door. You just stand there as he sets your snowboard up against the wall and places his down so he can turn to look at you.

“Well, I’m glad I got to meet you today Y/N even if it began with you making fun of you!”

The heat returning to your cheeks.

“Hey! I apologized about that!” You whine out, him laughing.

“It’s totally fine!” This time he pauses and looks down at your hands which are still holding each other. “Do you think I could maybe get your number?” You can tell he is nervous due to his tone and his free hand moving to scratch the back of his neck.

“I think that you just maybe could.” A big smile makes its way onto his face, as he goes to grab his phone from his back pocket and handing it to you.

You quickly type your number into his phone and hand it back to him. He smiles at seeing your contact on his screen before he locks it and puts it back in his pocket.

“Well maybe I will see you around!” You say, dropping his hand and going to open the door. An awkward goodbye, but you couldn’t think of anything else.

It takes him a few seconds before he’s stopping you.

“Hey, wait!” You stop and turn to look at him, as he steps towards you. He leans in and the closer he gets has you holding your breath.

He places a kiss to your cheek, both of you smiling as he pulls away.

“I would like to see you again before we leave Y/N and after we leave too, if that’s alright.” You smile at his confession.

“I think we could manage that,” you lean in this time and press a kiss to his cheek, “just text me.”

Then you turn and walk into your cabin closing the door with the biggest smile on your face. Leaving Charlie with a similar smile and pink cheeks on the other side.

He laughs as he hears your friends yell at you before he walks away.

He spends the rest of the night smiling and texting you, excited to see you again. While you spend the night with a twin smile and your friends bombarding you with questions about the cute boy who had a grandpa shirt as a mask.

#charlie gillespie #charlie gillespie imagine #charlie x reader #charlie gillespie x oc #charlie gillespie x reader #charliegillespieimagines #charliegillespieimagine #charlie gillespie x y/n #charlie gillespie headcanon #charlie gillespie one shot #charlie gillespie fanfiction #charlie gillespie fluff #charlie gillespie fic #julie and the phantoms #julieandthephantomsimagine #jatp

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district2001 · 3 years

Text

Boyfriend & Bestfriend

Seventeen AU: 14th member

Jangmi x Vernon, Jangmi x NCT Dream

Recap: Jangmi wakes up at an ungodly hour to see a boy she loves, plus her best friend.

Words: 1.2k

AN: Requests are OPEN:

This was meant to be released during Hot Sauce era, but girlie was a bit unorganised and only finished it this week. Also I’ve got my life together so expect weekly oneshots :)

Also also appreciate the numerous NCT song references, and BOYFRIEND REVEAL

Jangmi’s Masterlist

Jangmi slowly closed her shared bedroom door before quietly tip-toeing down the corridor. Her phones torch being used as a guide to not trip over the random jumble of shoes, Lego kits and packages cluttering the hallway.

She turned on the living room light, trying to make as little noise as possible.

“Kim Jangmi”

Her phone dropped from her grasp, and she winced as it hit the hard marble floor.

“What the fuck Vernon” Jangmi whisper shouted, as she bent down to pick up her phone and check for scratches.

Vernon leaned over the kitchen counter, to blow out the candle. He raised his eyebrows as he checked out her outfit. “Correct me if I’m wrong, but that jumper looks familiar?”

Jangmi smirked, as she grabbed a stray black bucket hat which was placed on the tv stand. “Leave it in the bathroom- and it’s mine.” She paused. “Should I be concerned that you’re eating in the dark?”

“Should I be concerned that you’re leaving the dorm at 4:32 in the morning, looking like you’re gonna rob a bank.” Vernon asked, munching on his corn flakes. “Also, I have the candle light. Better for the planet and our wallets”

She laughed sarcastically as she strutted to the kitchen and filled her water bottle with hot water. “What gave it away? The black-on-black outfit or the massive sunnies which cover half my face.”

“I’d rather you sneak out to see your boyfriend, and not that. I don’t think I make enough to bail you out.”

Jangmi reached over and grabbed a spoonful of cereal. “Guess you need to produce more songs then.”

Vernon grabbed his spoon back before handing over one of the reusable masks which were on the counter. “Don’t do anything stupid.”

“Yeah I know. I know.” Jangmi sighed, putting her mask on. “Go to bed soon. Unless you’re planning on seeing sunrise.”

Vernon muttered something under his breath as she closed the door behind her.

She hopped into Seungcheols’ brother’s old car (which he had gifted for her birthday this year) and popped a piece of chewing gum in her mouth as she drove down the streets of Seoul.

Once she arrived 2 blocks from her destination, she parked her car before whipping out her phone and began typing out a message saying that she’d arrived.

That was until she was rudely interrupted by knocking on the window.

Jangmi scoffed and unlocked the car, letting the two masked figures in the car.

“We have about 5 minutes till the others get here.”

“Could’ve had more but someone arrived a bit late.”

Jangmi turned around so she was facing the back seat. “Oh Fuck off Mark. There was a line at Maccas”

Mark lowered his mask before leaning over to the front and stealing a sip from her chocolate frappe.

She swatted his arm, before offering some of her drink to the boy in the passenger seat who was putting on his seatbelt despite the car being parked.

“Want some?”

“I’d rather kiss you.” And with that comment, Jangmi’s mask was quickly pulled down as her boyfriend gave her a quick peck.

“Listen guys, I know we’re all best friends here but like I’d prefer not sitting at the back when y’all are both sucking face.”

“One kiss Mark. One kiss.” Jangmi laughed, before grabbing her boyfriends’ hand, and placing it on her lap. “I know you’re jealous you’re not getting some but stop ruining the moment.”

“You would be getting some if you went on the blind date I set you up with.”

“Listen, I love you honey. But she was such a horrible pair for Mark. They’re both so busy, they would never find time for each other.”

“Yet he still has time to third wheel our dates…” Her boyfriend mumbled as he began adjusting the review mirror so he could fix up his hair.

“He’s my best friend, what do you expect.” Mark held out his hand for a fist bump, and Jangmi happily obliged. Ignoring the whine from her boyfriend for letting go of his hand. “Canada line for life!”

“You’re not even Canadian!”

“I basically made that groupchat what it is today.”

“Still not as elite as the 2000-line group chat.”

“Do I also need to remind you, I am also apart of that.”

“What’s up with you and joining groupchats you’re not apart of. Honestly.”

Mark reached over to grab another sip of the drink. “Do you both act coupley in that aswell? Cos Jaemin says you both are completely normal.”

Her boyfriend laughed before placing his hoodie over his hair again. “Only you get to see our romance in action.”

“I’d rather not.” Mark grumbled before clapping his hands. “We need to decide what we’re gonna do this weekend.”

“Should we do a movie night?” Jangmi suggested, squeezing her boyfriend’s thigh. “You wanted to watch the ‘To all the boy I loved series’.”

He nodded in confirmation. “Our dorm or yours?”

“Jeno said he wanted to watch it as well” Mark added. “So I think we can do ours?”

“Perfect! I’ll bring the snacks. And definitely some hot sauce.” Jangmi chuckled at her wordplay.

Her boyfriend smiled fondly at her, before pushing some strands of hair out of her face. “You’re lucky I love you.”

“And you’re lucky I love Chenle. That boy is so talented. Do one of you think he would go on a date with me?” She gushed, holding both her hands to her chest.

Her boyfriend grabbed her hands, before peppering them with kisses. “Still love him?” Jangmi couldn’t hold back her smile, her heart overflowing with warmness.

She looked into her lovers eyes, and subconsciously leaned over, with him mirroring her actions. Just when their lips grazed each other, Mark interrupted them by clearing his throat.

“I’m not sorry for interrupting this shit, but the rest of the guys have arrived.” He leaned forward, pushing his groupmate back, and gave Jangmi a very awkward car hug.

“Later loser.” Mark exited the car, giving her a casual salute.

Jangmi watched as he got into the NCT Dream van. Switching the drink to his right hand, as he opened the car door.

“Wait. My Chocolate frappe!” She shrieked, just realising that her drink had gotten stolen.

Her boyfriend laughed, before pecking her lip. “Vote for us today?”

Jangmi went in for another kiss. “When don’t I?”

“Can we call tonight?” He asked, rubbing his thumb up and down her hand.

She nodded, “I think we’re filming a dance practise video. I’ll try my best.”

He pouted before leaning in for another kiss. This one softer and longer than the rest.

Jangmi pulls away, taking a moment to appreciate her boyfriend. She parted his hair to have a clearer view of his sparkling eyes. Her favourite feature.

“Go before they horn us again.” She chuckled. “Also tell Mark he’s an asshole.”

“I don’t understand how you both are best friends” He muttered under his breath, as he unbuckled his seatbelt and readjusted the review mirror back into its original position.

He gave her one last kiss, pulled his hood down over his face and got out of the car.

Jangmi rolled down the passenger window, so he could rest his elbows the window frame.

“I love you Kim Rydel.” He whispered.

Jangmi smiled, before leaning over as far as she could towards the window.

“I love you too. Lee Donghyuck.”

#seventeen #svt #svt au #seventeen au #seventeen 14th member #kpop au #kpop imagine #kpop oc #nct #nct dream #mark lee #haechan #lee donghyuck #seventeen imagine #seventeen oc #Jangmi SVT OC

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reki-of-the-valley · 3 years

Text

Baked With Love

Here it is, the promised 8k of pure tooth-rotting fluff

Find it on AO3 here

In all the time that Reki had known Langa, he had never seen him hesitate. From that first day when Langa had taped his feet to a skateboard, he had always jumped headfirst into whatever it was that he wanted to do. He had never hesitated, always going for it and hoping for the best, so seeing him stare between the two jars he had placed on the table, brows furrowed and frowning, it was strange and somewhat endearing. Langa who never cared for consequences was hesitating between two jars of flour, face pulled in concentration rather than his usual spacey and lost expression.

“Dude, they’re both just flour,” Reki said, his chin resting on his folded arms against the kitchen table across from Langa. Both jars had been marked “flour,” but Langa insisted that there was a difference between them. He insisted that his mother used one for her baking while the other was kept for normal cooking.

“I know there’s a difference,” Langa said, brows still pinched, nose scrunching as he groaned. “They’re not the same. They can’t be.”

“Again, we’re just making cookies. Flour is flour and that’s all we need. Doesn’t have to be that baker’s fancy stuff.”

Langa sighed, finally settling for the jar on his right. “If you say so.”

“And I do. I guess you can say I’m a bit of an expert at making cookies.”

Reki grinned, laughing to himself as Langa nodded. Despite it being more of a joke than anything, Langa did trust Reki when it came to baking cookies. He had made hundreds if not thousands of them in his life and Langa always loved watching him whenever he would make. Langa had always been very vocal about his adoration of watching Reki work, be it in his workshop or in the kitchen. And, despite his burning face at the endless praise, Reki always loved the company. He loved having someone with him as he rambled away, his hands doing all the work.

While Reki loved baking with his sisters, it wasn’t the same as when it was just him and Langa. With his family, they were always bustling around the kitchen, bumping into each other, fighting to see who would break the egg – Koyomi won most of the time – and arguing about who would get the bowl and who would get the spoon once the cookies had been put to bake – the twins more often than not shared the bowl while Koyomi and Reki split what was left on the spoon. With his sisters, it was screams and giggles and grabbing at each other. And it was a lot of cleaning, which Reki found himself doing alone most of the time. Baking with his sisters was giving his mother a break, letting her sit down for an hour without worrying about the twins getting bored or asking for her attention. Baking with his sisters was just another activity he did with his family, being the good big brother he knew he had to be. Baking with his sister was Reki trying his best to be a good son, even if he would have rather be in his room or out skating with Langa.

But baking with Langa, it was calm and intimate, a little slice of heaven. It was quiet, low sunlight filtering into the kitchen as Langa sat on the counter, his legs swinging as he listened to Reki’s chatter with a content smile. Baking with Langa was muffled giggles and kisses in the middle of the night, with only the refrigerator light to light up their world. Baking with Langa was just… sweetness and domesticity. It always left Reki with a lightness in his heart, with the wish of baking cookies for Langa for the rest of his life.

Yet tonight, Reki was banned from working in the kitchen. Langa had insisted that he would be the one making the cookies all on his own. “You’re always making things for me,” he had said when Reki got ready to get to work. “I want to make something for you. I want to make these cookies for you, all on my own.”

And his face had glowed the moment Reki nodded, letting himself be pushed into the chair facing the kitchen. Langa, always so serious or spacey Langa, beautiful Langa with his boyish grin and his big, shiny blue eyes, had rarely seemed so excited. It wasn’t the same excitement as when he was on a skateboard, trying out new tricks or going up against strong skaters. Reki couldn’t quite explain the difference, but it was there. Langa seemed genuinely excited, not calculating in his excitement or expecting anything. It was an excitement that had a thousand butterflies blossom in Reki’s chest and stomach. It was an excitement that had him falling even more in love with Langa, childish, happy, and excited Langa.

“So, where do I start?”

Reki buried his face in his arms to muffle his laughter. He shouldn’t have been laughing – he knew Langa must have been pouting, not liking being laughed at – but he couldn’t help it. He couldn’t help it, even if he knew it wasn’t nice to be laughing at someone who was trying so hard to do something new, something nice, something for Reki, but then he was looking so cute, staring at Reki so expectantly, waiting for his instructions. Langa was waiting for Reki to guide him around his own kitchen. Langa always waited for Reki to explain to him new things.

“First things first-” Reki got up from his chair, laughter still lingering in his voice as he made his way to his boyfriend, his fingers slipping between the long, slender fingers he adored- “we tie your hair. I refuse to eat blue cookies.”

Langa tilted his head to the side. “What’s wrong with blue cookies? Sure, they look weird and- yeah, the person who made them was weird too, now that I think about it. Weird shit used to happen all the time in that school.”

Reki furrowed his eyebrows as he dragged Langa to the chair in which he had been sitting. “I meant your hair, dude. What the hell is a blue cookie? And why have you seen one? What kind of weird shit went down in Canada?”

Langa shrugged as he took a seat. “Public school. Was weird as fuck sometimes.”

Reki shook his head. There was no point in asking about that. From what he understood about Canadian public schools, it was a free-for-all of kids. From kids writing in sharpie on the floor next to the lockers to kids walking around with a bunch of stickers in their faces, things just sounded so weird. That and there was absolutely no consensus on how the education system worked throughout the country (something about provinces?) or even a consensus on language. Canada was weird, from what Reki understood. And the more Langa talked about whatever he saw, the more Reki felt terrified of Canadian kids.

Langa let himself be backed into the chair, trusting Reki as he always had. He only raised an eyebrow as Reki settled in his lap. But as soon as fingers were running through his hair, pulling it back to assess the situation, Langa melted, his head falling back with the motion. A content smile appeared on his pretty lips as his eyes shut.

“Don’t fall asleep on me, dude.”

“M’not…”

Reki chuckled, still racking his fingers through the silky blue hair. With Langa not paying attention to what he was doing, Reki knew he had free reign. He could do whatever he wanted with Langa’s hair, from childish pigtails like the twins to a low and messy ponytail to… well, whatever Reki wanted, really. And with that many choices, Reki hesitated. On one hand, he could make a fool out of Langa and laugh a little at him (not in a mean way! Just in a Langa-would-look-funny way), while on the other hand, he could try something new, something that would take time, more time for his fingers to be playing with every strand of hair, more time for him to be this close to Langa.

With a little contemplation and quick attempts to see what would hold Langa’s hair best, Reki settled on braiding. If done correctly, it would hold Langa’s hair back, keeping his bangs out of his face while he baked, and it would mean that Reki would have his fingers tangling with Langa’s hair longer than if he just pulled it back in a half ponytail. Reki had done enough braids in his life to know that they took more time and patience than ponytails or pigtails. He knew that Langa would melt under his touch, sighing contently as his hair was being played with, twisted into a braid.

Reki shifted in Langa’s lap, frowning and huffing as he let the hair fall from his fingers. Initially, getting comfortable on Langa’s lap had been an act of petty revenge, hoping to get him to blush the same way Reki had when Langa crashed on his lap a few days prior, but clearly, it hadn’t worked. Langa was just too cool for all of Reki’s tactics at making him feel embarrassed. Langa never turned red, except on rare occasions like when he first told Reki that he liked him or when he said ‘I love you’ for the first time. Langa was too cool for blushing, which Reki found terribly unfair, given how easy it was to get him to blush. Just a smile of Langa’s could get him to flush, nerves twisting in his stomach.

No matter how he looked at it, there was no way Reki was getting any work done from that angle. Not only was Langa extremely distracting, but there was also no good way to braid his hair back without being behind him. So Reki got up only to be pulled back down, Langa’s eyes snapping wide open, hands gripping Reki’s hips.

“Where you going?”

“I can’t tie your hair like this, you clingy baby. I’m not going far if that’s what you’re afraid of.”

“But you’re warm. Don’t go away?”

Reki chuckled as he tapped Langa’s nose. “You’re so clingy, you know that?” Langa’s pout was one of the cutest things Reki had ever seen. Langa’s childish dramatic displays were just so fun, so different from how he acted when his walls were up. “But I really gotta get up, dude. Otherwise, you’re never gonna get to those cookies.”

Langa finally gave in, grumbling a little as his grip on Reki loosened, just enough for him to slip away. His sour mood quickly faded away as Reki’s fingers found their way back into his hair, his content smile reappearing, his eyes falling shut once more. Langa might have been too cool to blush, but he still had his weaknesses.

Reki hummed as he twisted the blue hair away from Langa’s face, a braid on each side of his head before coming together in a ponytail at the back of his head. Strands poked out from the braids, too short to be braided back smoothly, but they held rather well as Reki tied them off with one of the many colorful elastics that decorated his wrists.

Those were a courtesy of Koyomi, an annoying little sister who always forgot to tie her hair until it was too late. After a few times of hearing her complain, Reki had gotten into the habit of carrying a few elastics around, which seemed to come in handy for everyone with relatively long hair around him. At first, he had stored them in his bag, then they had migrated to his pockets until they found their way around his wrists. Now, he was just known as that guy that carried hair ties around, which the girls in his class seemed to really take advantage of, asking him for elastics whenever they needed some. And Reki didn’t mind helping out, though it was a little annoying to never get them back. There were certain colors that he really liked having as they matched his hoodies, not that he would tell anyone that.

After one last assessment of his work, Reki grinned as his chin dropped onto Langa’s shoulder. It wasn’t the most comfortable position, his arm draped over Langa’s other shoulder, slightly crouched, but if it meant he could be close to Langa, then it was worth it.

“All done.”

Langa shifted ever so slightly, just enough to be looking at Reki rather than at the kitchen sink. He was smiling, that pretty smile that Reki loved so much.

“You should play with my hair more often.”

A light chuckled rumbled through Reki as he pressed a kiss to Langa’s shoulder. “You really like that, don’t you?”

“It feels nice. You’re good with your hands.”

It was an innocent remark. Reki knew that it had to be, because if it was Langa, there was no other option. There weren’t any dirty undertones to the remark, he knew that, but that didn’t stop the blush from exploding under Reki’s skin. There wasn’t any kind of raunchy joke in what Langa was saying, yet Reki still felt the twist in his gut as he straightened out, brushing off dust that he knew wasn’t there and tugging on the hem of his hoodie. Nervous laughter bubbled out of him, his eyes refusing to focus on anything.

“Right! Okay! So those cookies!”

Langa slowly turned to Reki, eyebrows pinches as he stared blankly. He hadn’t meant it like that, Reki knew that. Langa didn’t have a dirty mind. Langa was a good boy. Langa had never made a sex joke as far as Reki was aware, which meant that he wasn’t going to start now. Especially not when he was staring at Reki, looking so confused.

“What…?” His eyes snapped open, wider than Reki had ever seen in his life. His pale cheeks and ears turned a bright red as he waved his hands around frantically. “Wait! No! I didn’t mean-! I mean, I don’t know, but-!” Langa froze, his eyes squeezing shut as he tensed. He ducked his head as he always did when he embarrassed himself, but his bangs didn’t fall over his eyes as they usually did. There was no curtain protecting him from the outside world as he sat there, curled up on his chair, nails digging into the wood and his face pinched.

With a deep breath, Reki regained his composure. There was still that twist in his gut, that uncertainty, but he wasn’t going to let it linger. Not when Langa was so tense, looking so horrified by his accidental remark.

“S’okay, dude.” Langa’s eyes slowly fluttered open as Reki stroked his cheek tentatively, smiling softly at him. “It’s okay, I know what you meant. I just… I know.”

Despite the verbal reassurance, Langa did not relax. His nails still dug into the wooden chair, his ankles curling around one of the legs of the chair. He seemed so stiff that Reki couldn’t help but press a kiss to the corner of his mouth. Reki knew that he didn’t do it enough, that he didn’t initiate enough kisses or cuddles or anything remotely romantic. He always waited for things to happen, never chasing them, and Reki knew that Langa would have liked him to be a little less tense, a little less hesitant, a little less scared. It wasn’t on Langa to start everything, even if Reki was scared. Even if he was terribly afraid of doing something wrong. So maybe that was why he had pressed a kiss to Langa’s mouth, the touch making the boy melt against him, tension fading away slowly.

“Don’t worry about it. Really.” A small smile traced Langa’s lips as Reki pressed another quick peck to his mouth. “But you really should get back to those cookies. You know, if you want them ready before next week?”

Langa’s fingers curled around Reki’s, cold winter against Reki’s natural summer heat.

“Can you… Can you help me a bit?”

Reki nodded enthusiastically as he pulled Langa off his chair. It was so easy to grin around him, natural as breathing. And Reki loved helping. He loved feeling useful to those he cared about. He loved feeling like others could count on him, no matter what. So whatever Langa needed, Reki would be there. Whatever Langa needed him to do, Reki would do it with a grin.

“So, first step is,” Langa stared at his phone, scrolling up and down on the cookie recipe he had found earlier, “heat the oven.”

Reki leaned against the table and watched as Langa fiddled with the buttons and knobs of the oven, his whole face pinched in concentration. Reki felt the tightness in his chest, the butterflies crashing and fluttering against his heart. He felt all his emotions bubbling up in him, ready to spill out, spill until all he knew was Langa’s adorable concentrated expression, spill until all he knew was the sweetness of Langa’s chewed lips, spill until all he knew was Langa. Langa with his serious focus, messing with the oven as if it were a time machine that required the utmost precision to avoid the collapse of the whole universe.

“So, now that that’s done,” Langa straightened out and turned back to Reki, pulling his phone out once more to check the recipe, “we need to start mixing things.”

“Did you read the whole paragraph before starting?”

“Yes.” A beat of silence. Langa glanced down at this phone, eyes skirting over the screen as he quickly scrolled down before bouncing back up to find Reki’s. “Yes, I did.”

Laughter broke from Reki’s lips as he made his way next to Langa, shoulders bumping against each other. “Alright, you tell me what you want me to do and I’m on it.”

One by one, Langa listed off the ingredients that he needed. Reki made his way around the kitchen, opening cabinet after cabinet, trying his best to find where most of the ingredients were hidden. This wasn’t his kitchen; he didn’t know how Mrs. Hasegawa organized her kitchen, but he managed. The flour was already out, sugar had been found, eggs from the fridge, and all the extra little things that made cookies soft and sweet had been eventually spotted. One by one, all the ingredients that Langa had listed off found themselves on the table next to the bowl Langa had taken out earlier.

Reki slid back into his chair, chin resting on his folded arms against the table as he watched Langa measure his ingredients one by one. He read the amounts to Langa who seemed to struggle a little, spilling next to the measuring cups as he poured or splashing as he mixed with vigor. A literal child in the kitchen, but Reki didn’t have the heart to get him to calm down. He seemed to be having so much fun, his blue eyes sparkling like snowflakes under the warm afternoon sun. As long as he wasn’t the one stuck wiping everything down, Reki would let Langa be, let him have fun with his messy attempt at making cookies.

“Dude!” Reki coughed, waving his hand around. “Be more careful with the flour! That shit is volatile!”

“I didn’t think-!” Langa scrunched his nose before sneezing into his arm. “I didn’t think it would explode like that! It doesn’t do that in movies!”

The white cloud fluttered around before falling onto the counters and floor, snowfall right there in the kitchen. The impromptus blizzard had Reki chuckling and rubbing at his nose.

“Watch a cooking show and you’ll see you’re supposed to be careful with your ingredients, man.”

“Well, I’m sorry I don’t go looking for things that don’t exactly interest me. And all you send me are skating vids, so maybe this is on you. Maybe you,” Langa’s blue eyes narrowed onto Reki, but a smile tugged at the corners of his mouth, “should start sending me baking videos instead.”

A sly smirk pulled at the corner of Reki’s mouth as he flicked more flour in Langa’s direction. Langa yelped, sneezing again.

“Maybe I will; no more skating for you until you learn how to be careful with flour.”

Langa shook his head, rolling his eyes and rubbing the flour out of his nose, but he didn’t bother concealing his pretty smile. “Pass me the chocolate.”

Reki slid the bag across the table, but not without stealing a handful of chocolate chips which he immediately stuffed in his mouth. Langa raised an eyebrow at him as he poured into the bowl a lot more chocolate chips than he was probably supposed to, but then again, when was there ever too much chocolate?

“Those are for the cookies, Reki.”

“C’mon! It’s chocolate! You know I never have at home.”

Langa gave the batter a mix, trying to spread the chocolate chips equally throughout the dough. Reki stretched over the table, stealing some of the cookie dough and plopping it in his mouth before Langa could swat him with the wooden spoon he was using.

“Stop stealing my cookies! And stop complaining. You have a bunch of sweet at your place.”

“Never for long.” Reki licked his thumb, getting the last of the dough he had managed to grab. “Everyone hogs them, so I barely get any.”

“I buy you sweet almost every day.”

“A personal choice?”

Reki almost missed the eyebrow raise and the playful smile as Langa turned on his heel, fetching two spoons from a drawer. “Are you telling me to stop?”

“What?” Reki took advantage of Langa’s turned back, stealing more cookie dough. He knew he wasn’t supposed to, but raw cookie dough was just too good to pass up. “Never!”

Langa sighed as he came back to his bowl. Reki had successfully taken more dough, but he had left so much evidence that it was impossible for Langa to not know.

Giggles broke from Reki’s lips as he covered his head with his arms, ducking for coverage as Langa hit him repeatedly with his wooden spoon.

“Stop stealing my cookies!”

“Then stop leaving it unattended, dude! And pass the chocolate, I want more.”

Langa huffed, (sorta) gently smacking Reki on the head one last time before handing him the bag of chocolate chips. “Just don’t eat them all. My mom likes having some with her lunches and I don’t want to be scolded when she inevitably believes that I am the one who ate them all.”

Quiet calm fell back in the kitchen, Reki plopping chocolate chip after chocolate chip into his mouth while Langa went over his recipe once more, making sure he hadn’t forgotten anything. Reki watched as Langa muttered English words, his eyes glancing around the kitchen, pointing at everything he put into the dough. And once he seemed satisfied, he got to work, scooping the dough with his two spoons and desperately trying to make them into perfect little balls. Reki watched as Langa struggled, groaning every time he dropped a spoon or when the dough didn’t fall the way he wanted. It was a little sad, just watching him try so hard yet fail so miserably.

Reki felt Langa tense, his breath hitching, as Reki’s arms caging him against the table. His hands found Langa’s, warm palms guiding the repetitive motion of scooping dough with one spoon and scraping it off with the other, while his chin rested against Langa’s shoulder. And under his touch, Langa melted, leaning back into Reki, relaxing against his chest. And just like that, Reki was snuggling his boyfriend, smiling into his shoulder as he helped him prepare the cookies for the oven.

“It’s really just,” Reki did the motion once more, scoop and scrape, his fingers tightening around Langa’s. “Just like that. You don’t have to try to get them all round and cute. They’re gonna melt in the oven anyway.”

Langa huffed, but still, he turned his head just enough to press a kiss into Reki’s hair. “I know how to make cookies, you know. I’ve watched you make enough and it’s not the first time I’m making them.”

“Really?” Reki nuzzled Langa’s shoulder, muffling his giggles. “Because you’re really shit at this, dude.”

“Thanks. Not my fault I rather just buy them instead of struggling to make them.”

“Correction-” Reki pressed a kiss to Langa’s jaw, grinning into his skin- “you steal the cookies I have at home.”

Laughing came as natural as breathing when it came to Langa and his dramatics. Laughing was inevitable when he was whipping his head to the side to look at Reki, his eyes big and blue and bewildered. And when his voice was cracking, pitchy and funny, it was impossible to not laugh, happy and bright.

“You give those to me! And your mom insisted I bring home the last batch!”

“That’s not how I remember it going.”

“Well then, if you’re just going to insult me,” Langa shook Reki off, his arms falling to his side before looping around Langa’s waist, his whole body snuggling closer to his boyfriend’s, “you’re not having any of these.”

“You’re probably gonna end up eating them all anyway, dude.”

Langa huffed. “I hate you.”

“No, you don’t. In fact,” Reki nuzzled Langa’s shoulder once more, bumping his nose against the skin right below Langa’s jaw, “if I remember correctly,” he grinned into the skin, “you said you loved me just yesterday.”

Langa’s hands froze mid-scoop, his whole body tensing against Reki. A wildfire ignited under his skin, the snow-white skin turning to a blaze. Wildfire like never seen before. Langa was too cool for blushing, at least until he was reminded of his sudden love declaration over a late-night meal, Reki offering him the remains of his fries.

Langa’s shoulders untensed, sagging a little as he returned to his cookie dough.

“I meant it,” he whispered, his voice a little scratchy, tainted with embarrassment. “I meant it when I said I love you.”

“I know.” Another smile was pressed onto Langa’s shoulder. “I know you mean it.”

“I love you, Reki.”

Reki’s heart flipped in his chest. Sure, he had brought it up to tease Langa, but hearing him say it again, it left Reki as big a mess as it did the night before. It left him with those thousands of butterflies in his chest and stomach; it left him with giggles threatening to break from his lips; it left him with an explosion of color in his face and ears. Because Langa loved him, truly and wholly, and he meant it. Langa had meant the words he said. He never would have said them if he hadn’t meant them. He wasn’t the type to say what Reki wanted to hear. Langa spoke honestly and freely, even if his words sometimes came out clumsily and tripping over each other.

“I know you do.”

Something squeezed in Reki’s chest as he squeezed Langa’s middle before peeling himself off of the boy. He had wanted to stay there, warm against Langa’s body as he worked methodically, scoop and scrape, but the tray had been filled, 24 cookies laying neatly before the two.

He watched as Langa made his way to the oven, carefully pushing the tray in without burning himself. He was beautiful like that, crouched in front of the oven, looking through the glass door. He was beautiful like that, his hair pulled back, strands starting to slip undone. Langa was beautiful in every way possible, no matter what he was doing. And Reki loved him. Reki loved him in every way possible. Reki loved him, loved his shaky hands, loved his funny concentrated faces, loved his blue silky hair, loved his impulsivity, loved his kindness, loved him from head to toe, inside and out. Reki loved Langa, but whenever the words started to form, they clogged in the base of his throat, refusing to come out. Saying I love you turned out to be a lot more difficult than he had anticipated.

“Don’t feel obligated to say it back,” Langa had said the night before, his face flushed as his fingers tangled with Reki’s on his lap. “Only say if when you feel like it. Take all the time you need. And,” his smile faltered for a moment, but as soon as those sky-blue eyes met Reki’s, the smile eased its way back onto Langa’s lips, “if you never feel like saying it back, that’s also okay. I don’t want you saying it because you feel like you have to. Only when it feels right. Say it back to me when you’ll mean it. Because I mean it. I mean it when I say I love you.”

Only when it feels right. When would that be? It always felt like the right moment, but at the same time, it never felt like the right moment. Saying I love you for the first time, it had to be special, didn’t it? It had to be something straight out of a Hollywood movie. It had to be grand gestures and memorable. But then again, Langa had said it in the dead of the night, in a shitty 24-hour burger joint, over a half-empty carton of fries that Reki had pushed his way. Yet his eyes had shined like a thousand snowflakes under the clear moonlight, blurting out that I love youbefore clasping his hands over his mouth. His cheeks had flushed as Reki felt everything inside him twist, scared and excited and, and… and in love. Langa was the one saying the magic words, but Reki was the one who was so madly in love at that moment. Or maybe they both were. Maybe that was why Langa was laughing, grinning, fingers intertwining with Reki’s as he said it slower this time, in a way that was so genuinely Langa. No grand gestures. No fireworks. Just Langa and Reki sunken in a shitty booth in the back of an empty restaurant, giggling and grinning and burning up.

“I guess that’s it for now.” Langa got up, brushing off the remaining flour that had clung to his jeans. “We just have to wait now?”

Something strummed through Reki’s entire body, contracting, squeezing, choking. I love you. It was there, hanging on his lips as he watched Langa straighten out, beautiful Langa with his gorgeous blue eyes skirting over the kitchen. It pounded against his chest as he really took in the scene: a messy kitchen, soft white noise bouncing against the windows, a beautiful boy leaning against a counter. It was there, everywhere. And it had Reki dreaming of a future, one with Langa in it, one where they would have a place all to themselves where they could bake cookies together and just be happy, infinitely happy, forever the two of them.

Reki knew he could be reckless. Not like Langa, but he didn’t care for the scrapes and bruises he’d get when he tried a new trick on his board. He was impulsive by nature. If he wasn’t held back, he would be on a constant shopping spree, adding even more colorful hoodies and t-shirts to his closet. Reki rarely thought things through to the end, but when it came to his heart, he was calculating to a fault. When it came to his heart, he got so caught up in his head that he lost all his impulsivity, all his recklessness. When it came to his heart, Langa had to be the first to act otherwise nothing would happen.

What was Reki afraid of? Everything. Nothing. If he acted on impulse, maybe he’d go too far, too fast. If he acted as reckless as he did when he skated, then maybe Langa would realize that he was too much. And what if what he did was weird? What would he do then? Reki had never been in a relationship, he didn’t know how he was meant to act. And asking Langa what he was supposed to do, how he was supposed to act- no, that was too embarrassing. So he let Langa take the reigns on the relationship, even if he knew that Langa would have liked him to be just a little more assertive, just a little more sure of himself, just a little less afraid. He knew that it wasn’t right to have Langa make all the decisions for him, but Reki didn’t want to be pushy. At least, normally he didn’t like being pushy. But with I love you right on the tip of his tongue, love, desire hazing his mind, well…

“Hey.”

Langa jumped, his eyes growing three sizes as Reki pushed him into the counter, arms caging him once more, lips hovering over his. Langa’s breath was warm and uneven against Reki’s burning skin, something close to choked laughter. Langa was almost always the one initiating kisses and cuddles, but when Reki found the courage to act on his impulses, it always caught him off guard, leaving him a blushing mess.

“Hi?”

“You’re pretty, you know that?”

Langa relaxed, his shock starting to fade, unlike his blush. Arms circled around Reki’s waist, pulling him flush against Langa. Pretty laughter broke from his lips as they met Langa’s in a kiss.

“Is that so?” Langa said against Reki’s lips. “I don’t think you say it enough.”

They fit like the two last pieces of a puzzle, perfect against each other. With Langa’s arms around Reki’s waist and Reki’s arms around Langa’s neck, there was no leaving one another. Neither one was ready to let go, heads tilting to the side as the kisses left the realm of innocent pecks.

“You’re,” Reki gasped between kisses, “you’re so freaking beautiful. It’s,” another kiss, hot and wet, “it’s almost unfair.”

Langa was truly intoxicating, from the way his lips would quirk into a smile as he would press another kiss to Reki’s lips, slow and deep, to the way his fingers were fiddling with the stray threads on the hem of Reki’s hoodie. Langa was danger and Reki knew damn well that he was losing all his senses with every kiss that was pressed to his mouth. Langa was everything, good and perfect and so very hot.

It really didn’t take much for Reki to be breathless. All it took was a laugh of Langa’s, a touch of Langa’s, a kiss of Langa’s. Everything about Langa had him soaring high. Just one look with those heavy-lidded eyes, a flash of blue behind those long lashes, it was enough for Reki to lose himself completely to Langa. I love you.

“And you’re,” Reki laughed, panted, almost cried, “you’re so amazing. At absolutely everything.”

“Stop,” a kiss was pressed to the corner of Reki’s mouth, “stop talking.”

Reki didn’t need to be told twice, not when Langa’s mouth was pressed to his once more, their warm breaths mixing. Reki didn’t need to be told twice, not when Langa’s cold fingers were digging into Reki’s burning skin as he held him firmly against him. Reki didn’t need to be told twice, not when Langa’s tongue was licking at the seam of his lips, pressing against his, swiping against the roof of his mouth. Reki didn’t need to be told twice, not when he was whimpering into Langa’s mouth, lost to his touch, to his kisses, to his love.

Strands of blue hair slipped through Reki’s fingers, slipping from the elastic as he fisted at it. And with the little tug, Langa’s breath hitched and he melted against Reki, his fingers digging deeper into his sides.

“You,” Reki ran his fingers through Langa’s hair, freeing it from its braids as Langa let out a choked-out moan, “you really like that.”

“No?” More choked-up sounds rang against Reki’s ear as he trailed kisses along Langa’s jaw, his fingers following the natural line of his spine. Another whine as fingers moved from Reki’s hip to his arm, squeezing hard enough to leave a bruise, body curving under the touch. “Shut, shut up.”

“Make me.”

It had meant to be a joke, teasing and taunting, but as Langa’s ankle curled around Reki’s, flipping him and crashing his back into the counter, everything in Reki burned. His breath hitched, his heart hammering against his chest as Langa licked at his lips, biting his kiss-swollen lips, eyes darting down as he ran his thumb over Reki’s bottom lip.

“As you wish.”

His voice was raspy, low and… And as Langa’s fingers found their way under Reki’s chin, tilting his head up as he pressed their lips together, Reki felt himself slip. His arms tightened around Langa’s neck as Langa steadied him, hips flush as he held himself up against the counter. Langa. Always Langa. Langa with his addictive kisses. Langa with his sweet kisses. Langa who always knew exactly what he was doing. Langa who always knew exactly what he wanted. Langa who never hesitated. Langa that Reki loved so much. Langa that Reki loved most in the world.

“I,” Reki pulled back as Langa chased, another kiss cutting him off. “I love you.”

The words broke out before Reki could swallow them back, a whisper against Langa’s lips. Lips that froze, the next kiss never coming. A wave of anxiety crashed against Reki’s chest, choking him. Had he messed up? Langa had told him to shut up, but he didn’t. He kept talking because all he did was talk. He was always talking, talking too much when no one wanted to hear him. Reki didn’t know how to shut up and now he ruined a good moment because he just couldn’t hold his words back any longer.

“Really?”

Langa broke into a grin, his eyes twinkling with those blue snowflakes, and Reki couldn’t help the smile that grew against his lips. His voice had come out a few octaves higher, sounding so excited and happy. And as he glowed, shined, beautiful and overjoyed, Reki melted.

“Yeah, yeah, man. I mean,” there was laughter in his voice, lighter and higher than usual as he cupped Langa’s cheek, his thumb rubbing soothing circles into the soft skin, “yeah, I do mean it. I love you, Langa. Have for a long time.”

“I love you too. So, so much.”

Both broke into giggles against each other, wide grins pressed together in a poor attempt at a kiss. It was hard to kiss when they were both smiling so big, but it was even harder to pull apart. All Reki wanted was to be close to Langa, whispering “I love you” over and over against his boyfriend’s lips. All it took was saying once for Reki to want to say it over and over, every day until he couldn’t speak anymore. He was ready to say it now and forever.

Slow kisses filled Reki’s head and heart. There was no need to rush; they had forever, after all. There was need to be rushed and heated. Things could be taken one step at a time, slow and steady. They could enjoy the calm, peaceful moment, live blissfully in the present. And when Langa was touching him like that, his thumb rubbing comforting circled in the small of Reki’s back, it was wonderful. Peaceful and calm and so, so comforting. Nothing could pull them apart. Nothing could ruin-

Reki yelped as the smoke detector blared throughout the apartment. Langa scrambled away, muttering English curses under his breath as he opened every window in the room before pulling the oven door open to take out the burnt cookies.

Reki simply watched, frozen against the counter, his hand covering half his face. He felt the mixture of horror and laughter bubbling up in his chest as he watched Langa run around, controlling the situation. Thankfully, it didn’t take long for the blaring alarm to shut off, the apartment plunged back into silence. And when Langa crashed next to Reki, elbows pressed into the counter and pushing his bangs away from his eyes as he huffed, Reki dropped his head onto Langa’s shoulder, moving closer.

“Well shit, man. Didn’t you put on a timer or something?”

Langa pursed his lips as he glanced at Reki. “I was going to. But then someone,” he flicked Reki’s forehead playfully, but Reki didn’t miss the blush creeping up his neck, “jumped me before I could. And then I forgot.”

Reki giggled into Langa’s shoulder, arms wrapping around his middle to hug him. When Langa put it like that, it was a little embarrassing. Reki who had always been so careful, who was always so calculating when it came to his heart, who was also always so caught up in his own head when it came to love and Langa, he had let himself get carried away. He had let himself get so carried away that the cookies had burnt. He was the reason their cookies were charred and good for the trash.

“Reki? Reki!” Reki glanced up at Langa who was shifting to face him. Langa held his face so gently, his thumb stroking Reki’s damp cheeks. “Reki, what’s wrong?”

“I burned your cookies,” Reki laughed. He felt the tears in the corner of his eyes, he felt them streaming down his cheeks, but they weren’t from sadness or distress, even if he was gasping, choking, hiccupping as Langa continued brushing the tears away. These were tears of laughter, purely joyful and ridiculous. “Your cookies burned because of me, man!”

“No, no, my love.” Langa peppered kisses all over Reki’s face, from his cheeks to his nose to his eyebrow to his forehead. “It’s not your fault, my love. I would have burned them regardless.”

Reki felt his heart flutter as he raised an eyebrow at Langa. “My love?”

Langa froze mid-kiss, his fingers going rigid against Reki’s cheeks as he tensed. “Too soon?”

Was it too soon? Reki shook his head. It absolutely was not too soon. Reki kept shaking his head, laughter sweet on his lips as he beckoned Langa closer.

“Never.”

It had always been a dream of Reki’s to be called “my love.” It was one of those things he had heard in movies and in tv shows when he was young, and ever since he had wanted to find himself someone who would call him all those cute pet names that they said in his mom’s shows. My love. Sweetheart. Darling. Honey. All those cute little pet names that would make his heart flutter when he thought of someone saying them to him.

With time, he had given up on that dream – “those are just for girls,” his friends had told a few years back when he had first expressed his desire to be called so – but hearing the pet name come out of Langa’s mouth, it had Reki’s heart soaring. They weren’t just for girls. It wasn’t just a stupid fantasy of his. It wasn’t because Langa was there, whispering his name followed by “my love” over and over into his skin, pressing kisses all over his face, damp cheeks and all.

When Langa’s lips met Reki’s in a kiss, it was sweet as ever. Langa’s arms found their home around Reki’s waist while Reki’s fingers fiddled with a stray lock of blue hair, their smiles pressed together. It was just so easy to be in love with Langa, beautiful Langa, beautiful Langa with his funny nose that would bump against Reki’s every time he would pull back to breath before pressing another kiss to Reki’s lips. Beautiful Langa who only seemed to only care for Reki. Beautiful Langa who called Reki his love and meant it.

“You’re,” Reki rubbed his nose against Langa’s affectionately, “you’re so shit at making cookies, you know that?”

Langa shut his eyes as he took a deep breath, his usual half-hearted annoyance appearing on his face. Reki chuckled against him, shaking the two ever so slightly. It was just so much fun to tease Langa, lovingly making fun of him.

“Ever the romantic, aren’t you?”

“You said you liked honesty, so I’m just being honest with you. You’re absolute shit at baking, man, but you’re my shitty baker.”

“Can’t,” Langa inhaled sharply, “can’t I have just one nice moment?”

Reki twirled a lock of Langa’s hair around his finger before pushing himself up, catching Langa’s lips in a kiss. “We are having a nice moment. You just don’t like that you’re finally bad at something.” Another short and sweet kiss was pressed to Langa’s lips. “But I still love you. I love you even if you would be an absolutely shitty househusband.”

“I would be-! Wait, backtrack.” Langa quirked an eyebrow as a sly smirk pulled at the corner of his mouth. “You tell me you love me for the first time like 20, 30 minutes ago and you’re already thinking of marriage?” Reki gulped as Langa leaned in, close enough to feel his every short breath, but far enough to not be able to kiss him quiet. “Moving a little fast, don’t you think?”

“I-!” Reki huffed, straightening himself out. He felt the burn in his ears and in his face, but he persisted. He was not going to be tongue-tied. “You know what? Yeah. I am. But only because you-” he jabbed Langa’s chest, Langa who was laughing so freely and prettily- “started it by saying you wanted to skate infinitely with me! So, who’s moving fast now, huh?”

“Bold of you to assume I’d say yes.”

“Excuse me?” Reki was taken aback by the statement, especially when the implication hit him like a truck. Or a car. He scrunched his nose, eyes narrowing onto Langa. “Well bold of you to assume I’d be the one proposing.”

“I confessed first!” Langa’s eyes were big and round as he held a hand to his heart. “And I said I love you first! The least you can do is… It’s the least you could do!”

“Fine!” Reki pushed himself up onto the counter, his legs dangling in the open air. His head fell to the side as he swayed side to side. A grin stretched across his face as he stuck his tongue out playful. “I’ll propose the day you manage to make me an amazing cookie. The best cookie I’ll ever eat.”

“Oh c’mon! Low blow,” Langa whined, all pouty and cute. “That’s gonna take forever, Reki.”

“Then start working on it, Pretty Boy.”

Langa huffed, peeling himself off of the counter only to squeeze his way between Reki’s knees. Determination sparkled in his eyes as his entire focus fixated on his boyfriend. His fingers dug into Reki’s thighs as the boy’s ankles hooked behind his back, pulling his hips into the counter. And as soon as Reki’s hands were cupping his face, all signs of a pout faded.

“You know what?” Reki hummed, playing with the blue bangs as he had the habit of doing. It kept his hands busy while he focused on his boyfriend’s moving mouth. “I’m gonna make you the best fucking cookie ever and then you’ll be stuck with me until the end of infinity.”

A smile pulled on the corners of Reki’s mouth as he leaned down, meeting Langa in the middle for yet another sweet kiss. He had lost count of how many they had shared in the past hour or so, but Reki couldn’t be bothered by that. When it was just him and Langa, it didn’t matter how many kisses were shared, as long as they could be close, smiling and having fun. But it definitely felt good to be able to kiss Langa so freely, alone in the apartment. There was nothing to worry about as Langa’s fingers dug into his jeans, pushing himself up, chasing Reki’s mouth every time he pulled back to laugh. There was nothing to worry about as his fingers raked through Langa’s hair, playing with the locks as he got to kiss his boyfriend. There was nothing to worry about, not even the thousands of butterflies that erupted in his stomach, not even the giggles that threatened to break from his lips, not even the clumsy attempts at copying Langa and the clumsier attempts at making Langa feel as good as he did. Reki didn’t have to worry about anything because Langa too seemed lost to his touch, to his kisses, to his love. Because just like Reki, Langa was in love.

“I can’t wait,” he breathed against Langa’s lips, pretty and pink and oh so sweet. “I can’t wait to love you forever.”

64 notes · View notes

eelistolvanen · 3 years

Text

Bruises that you left behind - Travis Konecny Finale

A/N: HERE IT IS!! Finally got around to finish off the last parts. This chapter is a bit longer but hopefully you like it. Thanks to everyone who read this series, I honestly never thought I would be able to publish a nearly 20k long fic. So thank you for reading, liking, reblogging or sommenting on it. <3

Words: 5k

Warnings: Angst, no proofread (as usual), don’t know what else

Links to the previous parts:

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4

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“Have you looked at the teams that could draft you?” Your voice was quiet, soft. You weren’t entirely sure if this was crossing the line or not, since you knew that he didn’t want to think about the draft to much. But you couldn’t stop yourself.

“No, Y/N. It’s not in my hands anyway.“

“Well I did. And I think-“ “ Don’t Y/N. I could literally go to any team.”

“But some are more likely and some seem nicer than others…” You could hear him let out a deep sigh, letting you know that he gave in. “ Oh, yeah?”

“Yeah, I mean Ottawa would be perfect. You already play here and I’ve almost gotten used to this city. Calgary, Edmonton, Winnipeg are around there as well. There not as close as Ottawa but still Canada. Maybe there’s some other smaller cities…”

“Y/N, there are no real small cities. And you can barely tolerate Ottawa and it’s one of the smaller ones… Detroit’s close and-“

“But it’s so industrial and dark and… I don’t know, Travis. I just… What if it’s somewhere far away?”

“You’ll come with me… I’m not leaving you behind and I know you don’t like cities and would rather live here on the farm but I can’t change it.”

You let out a deep breath. “Travis, I just.. I want to come with you, I do. But I’m not made for a big city. I love my friends, my family, everything we’ve got here. And dragging me into some big city far away, feels a lot like locking me up in a cage. And you know how much I value freedom.”

“But you’ll make new friends, and you’ll warm up to living in a city, just like you did with Ottawa. WE can do this, we’re going to be just fine, okay?”

When you looked into his eyes you could see how sure he was of this, so you slowly exhaled.

“Okay. But promise me that you’re not gonna do this to me. If it’s someplace too big or to constricting for me, you won’t keep me locked in a cage. Promise me you won’t clip my wings.”

He gave you a soft smile and slowly caressed your face before his expression turned serious.

“I promise I won’t do this to you.”

You were struggling to breath, trying to gasp for air.

“No, no no no. This is not…” You didn’t really know where you were going with this. Your heart was aching more than it had in a while. The things was he was right. You could almost hear 17 year old Travis saying it. He had promised you. He had promised you to not constrict you, promised you to not take you into some big dark city. How you hated cities. Or at least used to hate them.

He meant to do the right thing, at the wrong time. And how wrong he had been…

“I didn’t want you to have this life, you deserved someone better. Someone who is there for you all the time. Someone who doesn’t spent most of his time on the road while you are left behind in some apartment, some city that you hate. Before I was drafted I promised you I would never do this to you. Lock you in a cage, clip your wings as you said. You hated the city, you hated the thought of being away from your family and friends. You loved being outside, being in nature. Port Stanley, the lake, the farm. This life here is everything you hate. And I would not put you through this, no matter how much I loved you.”

This felt like a dagger straight through your heart. You really couldn’t imagine yourself living that life back then.

“I moved here for you, Travis. Because I loved you. And…” He took the words straight out of your mouth.

“That’s what I mean, Y/N. I didn’t want you to give up your dream life just for me. Can’t you see that?

“Hah…” your laugh sounded bitter, almost cruel. “How couldn’t you see how happy I was? I wanted that life Travis! You didn’t do this to me. I choose to come to Philly Travis! I made the final decisions. Because I loved you. Because it was worth it to me. But do you know what you really did? You left me! On our wedding day. And I tried to come after you but you already left. And I waited and waited and waited in our house. The house we were supposed to grown old together. Spend our time in the off season. Raise our kids.”

You paused trying to get some air in, now you felt like you were being constricted. Travis’ hand moved towards you, he tried to reach out to you but you pulled back. Took a step back, trying to get some more space between the two of you. You took a deep breath.

“But then Nolan told me where you were and that you wouldn’t come back. You never came back! So when Nolan left I burned the letter and started packing everything up. By midnight of that day I was gone.”

“I’m sorry, Y/N.”

“Don’t! Sorry just doesn’t cut it.”

There were many moments were you felt broken, shattered in the last few years. But were have you felt this low. And little. And humiliated. You felt like the invisible hand around your neck had tightened. You needed to get out of here.

“I.. can’t do this, Trav. I need… time.” You barely got those words over your lips. You could see that Travis wanted to say something, reach out to you in any way. But he didn’t. He knew better than that. So he watched you get in your car and drive off into the distance. Probably trying to put as much space as possible in between the two of you.

---------------

You threw yourself into work after that. Week after week. Occasionally meeting up with the girls or some of the guys on the team. You knew better this time than to push Nolan out of your life. You started to help Maddie with the wedding planning, even if you felt a little tug in your heart everytime you did. You felt like you were starting to get your life back a bit. Piece by piece.

It was a Sunday afternoon in late March when you felt a sudden urge to clean your apartment. You went through the kitchen, the living room and were just about starting in your room when your eyes fell onto a drawer in your room. And suddenly you felt like you knew exactly what you had to do. You felt pretty erratic and your mind was racing.

Within 20 minutes you were sitting your car in front of a building halfway through town. And for the next 10 minutes you contemplated whether this was actually the right thing to do. Was this really what you wanted? Should you really go through with it? But you were already here, so you exited the car.

Only when you walked through the lobby you realised that you weren’t sue how to get to his apartment. He wasn’t living in the same building anymore, then you used to live in. The receptionist probably wouldn’t just let you in and you didn’t really felt like explaining your situation to the receptionist.

So instead you exited the building and made your way back to the car. You needed to talk to him, now. Before you run again.

You didn’t have his number either so you texted Nolan to text Travis to come outside. You felt pretty weird, almost like some stalker waiting in front of a building until the person left the building or so. Thankfully, it didn’t take Nolan very long to respond and telling you that he texted Travis. He also mentioned that Travis hadn’t read the text yet.

You were still staring at you phone waiting for Nolan to update you when he exited the building and walked towards you. His steps were cautious and he seemed pretty tired. When he finally was a few steps away you felt your mind catch up.

“Uhh, I was just in the neighbourhood…” What a dumb thing to say, Y/N; you thought. He knew this was a lie. You were never in this area of town. But Travis seemed more confused than anything.

“Ah, yeah okay… What’s going on?” He seemed more nervous than usual. His confidence seemed non existent at this moment. He looked like a deer in the headlights. Well, you came to him so you might as well say what you came here for.

“I thought a lot about us after that conversation, Travis.” He looked guilty at the mention of your last conversation.

“You know, the reason why I burned that letter that day was because I thought that no matter what the reason was, it wouldn’t matter. Because in the end you left me. Yes, I wanted to know the reason why you did it. But it doesn’t change anything. No reason truly justifies what you did to me. Or makes up for all the pain. It just gives me clearance. You know even with that good intention, I just don’t understand why you didn’t ever talk to me about it. We were 17 when we made that promise and I don’t think we ever brought it up again.”

Travis was shaking his head desperately, you were pretty sure he knew where this was going.

“Please don’t, Y/N. Please…” But he knew he was losing this game.

“We’re not the Y/N and Travis that we once were. Not anymore. And we never will be, Travis. Believe me I want nothing more than to go back to that time. To that couple that we used to be. But this is never going to happen Travis and we both have to accept that.”

“You don’t know that, I mean you can’t just give up. I can’t do this without you.”

“You gave up on us a long time ago. And yes, you can. You’ve done it before. Just this time, I’m going to be the one who walks away.”

“Y/N…”

You stepped towards and took his hands in yours as you leaned in and gave him a kiss on the cheeks. As you pulled away you placed something into his palms.

“Goodbye, Travis”

You stepped back towards your car as he looked down at his hands.

The little velvet box with your engagement ring.

And he knew that this was it.

Game over.

------------------------------------

The rest of the school year passed quickly and soon summer came around. You had been so busy teaching and helping Maddie with the wedding, time had flown by quickly. You hadn’t seen Travis again and you felt yourself heal again. You knew that there would always be a piece of you that would never be over him. A little piece of your heart would belong to him. But slowly you came to terms with the fact the the rest of your heart wouldn’t.

It was mid July now and Maddie’s wedding was finally here. You had been busy all weekend and you finally felt yourself able to relax as you were sitting in a chair getting your make up done.

“He’s gonna be here. He’s invited.” Maddie glanced over her shoulder towards you as her hairstylist send her a glare for moving around.

“I know Maddie, I’ll be fine.” You weren’t sure if that was actually true but at least you could try to make yourself believe that. Maddie didn’t comment on that but you were sure that she wasn’t really believing you.

The ceremony was drawing closer as you helped with Maddie’s dress and later slipped into your dress as well.

Eventually there was a knock on the door from Kevin, who was picking you up to walk you downstairs to the ceremony. He offered to be your date. He was one of the only single guys that you knew and you were sure that I wouldn’t hurt to have him by your side.

“Ahh, of you’re you look absolutely beautiful.” He gave you a beaming smile as he escorted you to the down the stairs and outside.

“You look sharp too, Kev. A real suit guy.” You winked at him as his booming laugh shook his body.

“Okay, calm down with that roasting.” He wasn’t really serious though, he loved when you chirped him.

“When your big day coming anyway? Ever gonna settle down?” Your eyes glinted, you knew how much he wanted to get married and have kids.

He just scoffed before replying,

“Yeah, yeah. One day I will find the right girl, you just wait.”

You started to mix with other guest as more people were drawing in, since the ceremony was coming closer. You spoke to some of the guys, found Nolan and Kelsey before going of to the side the catch some air.

You overlooked the seats and the aisle leading towards a little podium and you felt that heartache again. You just couldn’t quiet shake that wedding sadness. You were lost in thought when you felt someone approaching.

You knew it was him behind you before you even turned around. The two of you had seemingly always had that. That special connection. That buzzing feeling you would get if he was close to you. The way you would always find each other in a crowded room. Like two magnets pulling towards each other.

And knowing that you would never get that with anyone else, ever, made your heart feel heavy. Travis had always been the one for you and no matter how hard you tried nobody could ever take his spot. You could love someone, yes. You could even see yourself spend your life with someone. But this person could never be him. They would never be able to make you feel what he did. You could never get that special connection, that buzzing feeling with anyone else, ever.

“I’m sure you’ve already been told but… You look stunning, Y/N!” He stepped beside you while you turned to face him. He was dressed in your favourite navy suit and a crisp white dress shirt. He wasn’t wearing a tie, the top buttons of his shirt were unbuttoned instead. He gave you a shy smile. One that told you that he wasn’t entirely sure whether he just stepped over a line or not.

“Thank you. You don’t look to bad yourself, Travis.” An you meant it. He did look good. Better than he had in months. The bags under his eyes had disappeared, he looked younger now. More like his actual age. And there was a glint in his eyes. The sparkle that you used to love so much.

He stayed silent for a bit. You could see he was deep in thought, somewhere else even though physically he was beside you. Just when you got used to the silence between you two, he spoke up again.

“You were right. We’re not the same people we once were. And we never will be. We will never be the Y/N and Travis we once were. And we will never be the couple we were then. People change and people grow. You’re not the same person at 20 than you were at 17. And you’re not the same person now than what you were at 20. And I just know that the person that I am now loves you just as much as the person I was at 20. Or the boy I was at 17. And I know that I will still love you when I’m 40. Or 70. I will never stop loving you, Y/N.”

He took a deep breath, trying to sort the words that were swirling around in his head into a sentence. His little speech left you breathless. You were sure he had been thinking about this for weeks. And he was right, people do change and people grow. But that doesn’t always mean that people grow in the same direction.

“I’ve always wanted this, you know?” He was gesturing around him. “Since I met you I knew that you were the one for me. That you were the one I was going to marry one day. You were the person I wanted to have kids with. I wanted this life for us so bad, I lost sight of us. I lost myself and the person I used to be. And when I realised that I felt like I had already pushed you into it. So I did the only thing I knew. I ran.”

Your heart felt heavy and looking at him wasn’t helping. He wasn’t looking at you, his eyes were trained on the ground but you could see the glazing over his eyes. He was close to tears and this truly hit home to you.

He had told you so many times that he didn’t intent to hurt you but you never believed him, how could you? But now you understood that he truly thought it was the only way. That he had already pushed you too far into the cage to retrack what he had done. That the only way to keep you from losing your freedom was to let you go. To leave the cage open and walk away.

He got it all wrong though. Because you didn’t feel like he was putting you in a cage or clipping your wings.

“I wanted to marry you, Travis. You weren’t pressuring me into it.” He had to know that, the last thing you wanted was for him to carry that guilt around.

He finally turned his gaze towards you and looked you in the eyes. His lips were pressed into a pained line.

“I know. I know that now.” His eyes searched for yours before he slowly took a step towards you.

He brushed a hair out of your face before giving you a quick kiss on your forehead.

“Enjoy the wedding. I might see you later.”

The gesture was so sweet, so intimate. It felt so domestic, like something he would do everyday. A painful thought crossed your brain then. It felt so domestic because he used to do it everyday.

“You ruined weddings for me.” You didn’t mean to say those words out loud, you weren’t even consciously thinking them and to be honest you thought he was out of earshot already. But he stopped in his track and turned back to you. You didn’t dare to fully turn around, only just looking over your shoulder.

“I’ve ruined a lot of things for you, Y/N. I wish I could undo it.” And with that he vanished into the crowd.

You endured the ceremony. Well maybe that’s a bit harsh. You were happy for Maddie and Provy and the ceremony was incredibly beautiful. But you couldn’t help the bitter taste in your mouth. This should have been Travis and you, 3 years ago.

You let the wedding pass over you, you enjoyed hanging out with the team, catching up with the girls, you even let Kevin drag you to the dance floor.

You tiredly let yourself fall into a chair besides Kevin. You followed his gaze to another table. Travis was sitting there, seemingly without much company. You didn’t know whether he had a date or not but by the looks of it was he here by himself. Kevin must have noticed that you were looking at Travis.

“If you’re ever going to forgive him and give him another chance, might as well do it now. I know he will wait for you for as long as you want but… you never know how long someone is going to stay in your life. Take it from someone who had both parents go through cancer and nearly lost a leg, okay? Life won’t wait around for you. Don’t let it pass you by.”

With that he rose from his chair beside you. You wanted to make some funny remark about him being all poetic and shit but he had already made his way towards the bar. You followed his advice non the less and made your way towards Travis.

“This seat taken?” He nearly fell off his chair once he realised who asked the question.

“Of course! Uh, I mean, no it’s not taken.” You chuckled at him stumbling over those words. You sat down.

“You seem lonely, no date?” The words were out of your mouth before you could stop them. Was this to much? Did you step over a line? Travis seemed to relax himself and smiled.

“Ah haha, yeah no date. You came with Kevin?” It was nonchalant but you knew the deeper meaning behind his question.

“Yeah, always better to come with a friend than alone, you know.”

He nodded agreeingly before an uncomfortable silence fell between the two of you.

The songs were a slower than before which meant they weren’t as tiring as before. And before you could stop yourself your suggestion had already crossed your lips.

“Do you wanna dance?”

An immediate smile spread across Travis’ face. “Yeah, of course. I mean if that’s what you want.”

You laughed quietly and nodded. “Yeah, I’d like that. Just don’t step on my feet.”

“I try my best.”

For a bit the two of you swayed quietly to the music. It was already rather late so there weren’t to may people on the dance floor. The song changed and you let out a dry laugh as you realised what song had come on. Travis must have notice your reaction too.

“What?” He looked confused. “What’s funny.”

“Nothing, just the song.” He stilled and listened to the music. It was a Lewis Capaldi song. And it hit closer to home than you liked.

I've been holding on to hope That you'll come back when you can find some peace 'Cause every word that I've heard spoken Since you left feels like an hollow street

The song perfectly seemed to portray you and Travis. You felt your emotion dwelling up, as you heard the next verse.

I've been told, I've been told to get you off my mind But I hope I never lose the bruises that you left behind Oh my lord, oh my lord, I need you by my side

You let out a choked laugh. “I wish I could get you off my mind, but I can’t. Part of me will always be yours, Trav.” You gave him small smile before singing that verse again as it was repeated.

“I've been told, I've been told to get you off my mind, but I hope I never lose the bruises that you left behind. Oh my lord, oh my lord, I need you by my side.”

Travis seemed to understand your involvement with the lyrics as he gave you a sad smile.

“I was such a coward. I’m sorry Y/N.” He brushed a tear away that had started to roll down your cheek. “I should have fought for us, instead I gave up on us. I thought that the only way to give you the freedom I promised you, was to let go of you, to leave you. I was too much of a coward to let you fly free, because I thought you’d slip away and then I lost you anyway. I know you wanted to get married too but I should have never put that much pressure on it. I’m truly sorry.”

You leaned you forehead against his as you still slowly moved with the music. The song had changed now.

“I know Trav. I know. Do you think that one day we can be Y/N and Travis again? I mean not the same as we used to but a grown version. Do you think it could work again?”

You could hear Travis holding his breath as he patiently listened to you. His eyes were trained on yours, searching for meaning behind your words.

“Yeah, I think so. If you give me another chance I will prove it to you. Okay?”

You felt your heart speeding up at his words. Take a chance, you thought, before life passes you by. But instead of answering you leaned in and slowly connected your lips with his. The kiss was slow almost shy at first before Travis started to deepen it. Once you broke apart Travis slowly stroked your cheek before murmuring,

“You’re my always, you know that right?”

Epilogue:

The two of you took it slow afterwards. Both of you needed to get to know each other again, ease into each other again. But it felt right. Being with Travis had always felt right. Once your lease was up you move in with him and you were thankful that he wasn’t living in your old house anymore. As much as you loved your old place that you had together and all the memories that came with it, you needed something else. After all you weren’t the people that you used to be then. And that was a good thing.

He never asked you to marry him. One day a little box with an new engagement ring had just been placed onto your nightstand. Travis only comment to this was that he had already proposed to you and that this time you were calling the shots when you felt ready to marry him. And whenever you felt ready the ring would be there. He let the old engagement ring be made into a pendant since it was to meaningful to your relationship to give it away and to pretty to just let it sit in a box. And now you were wearing one around your finger and one around your neck, close to your heart as Travis liked to say.

And then the day was here. You knew you were ready but that didn’t mean that you weren’t feeling a tiny bit anxious about your wedding day.

Maddie looked over your shoulder and soothingly rubbed your back.

“You’re going to be the most beautiful bride.” She gave you one of her bright smiles.

You quietly laughed. “As if Maddie. You looked like some top model or something at your wedding. But I’ll gladly take second.”

Maddie erupted in laughter while you gave her a sly smile. Her expression turned serious again as she eyed the object in your hands.

“You’re gonna have to tell him eventually, Y/N.”

She was right, of course. And you knew you had to tell him sooner or later. You couldn’t keep it from him forever.

“I’ll go and get you something to drink, some water or something.” Maddie gave you a soft smile before making her way to the door. Just before she closed the door behind her you heard her say:

“What are you doing here? You’re not supposed to be here now…”

You felt like your heart stopped beating for a moment. An unwanted flashback crossed your brain.

The mental picture of Nolan making his way towards you with that cautious expression on his face.

“He’s not coming, Y/N.” Those words would probably haunt you forever.

Just as you felt yourself starting to panic Travis appeared in the doorway and quickly closed the door behind him.

“Travis?!” You probably looked like you just saw the lochness monster or something. What was he even doing here?

He approached you with a sly smile on his face.

“Hey, babe.” “You’re not supposed to see me before the ceremony..” Your words lacked any kind of force or enthusiasm. And before you knew your soon to be husband had engulfed you in a hug.

“What? Who said that?” His voice was light, almost joking.

“It brings bad luck or misfortune if the groom sees the bride before the ceremony.” Your explanation sounded lame and you were actually happy to see him even if your initial surprise might let him believe otherwise.

He chuckled before giving you a quick kiss on the lips. “Ahh, that sounds pretty stupid. And you can’t blame me for wanting to say good morning to my wife.”

His eyes searched for yours while he gave you his brightest smile. You couldn’t help but chuckle at his antics. Then you remembered the object you’d held in your hands just a few moments before and you got serious again. Now was as good of a moment than ever.

“There’s something I have to tell you.” You felt yourself grow nervous, you knew there was no reason for it but you couldn’t help it.

“Don’t tell me you want to run away this time.” He was joking, a smirk plastered all over his face.

“Travis I’m serious!” At that his smile dropped. Uncertainty crossed his features.

You grabbed the little square paper you had put down moments ago.

“I’m pregnant.” You breathed out while handing him the ultrasound. His eyes nearly popped out of his head while he stared at the picture.

“I.. I … You..” He seemed lost for words and you were almost starting to get worried when he lifted him head up and looked into your eyes. He seemed to explode with happiness.

“I’m going to be a dad? This is not a joke right? We’re having a baby?” You could just nod as he picked you up and spun you around.

“Oh my god, this is the best day of my life.” He nearly knocked his head with yours as he dove in to give you a deep kiss. Once you pulled apart and you found your breath you spoke up.

“Promise me something, Travis. Promise me you won’t run again. Promise me that you’ll fight for us no matter what we face. Don’t ever let me go again, Trav.”

“Never! I promise.”

~ the end ~

#travis konecny #travis konecny imagine #travis konecny x reader #travis konency fic #nhl fic #nhl imagine #hockey imagines #philadelphia flyers #My writing

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thesmokingguns · 3 years

Text

A Dream Come True

Warnings: Slight language, mention of infertility issues

Song by Elton John

First part of my A-Z one shots I’ll be writing. I changed this idea about ten times and ended up writing pure fluff. I think the A-Z is going to have Motley Crue and GNR members and have eveyrthing from fluff to smut. I’m hoping to post one a week.

I can hear your heart

Pounding in my ear

Now I feel the sound

And the time is near

I feel the taste

Of all the things you do

Now the time has come

I know you're a dream come true

I thought it had been a joke when you had said you wanted to get me pregnant. To see me swollen with your baby. I figured it was something that you were saying to me when you were horny and wanted to ease me into letting you cum inside me.

But then I noticed how you would stare at me when I was playing with Vince’s kids. You’d watch me run around with them, kiss scapes, feed the baby a bottle, or when I would walk around with a kid on my hip hour eyes would flash with something I didn’t understand.

Want.

I never realized how much you wanted a family until you got the idea lodged into your head. You became obsessed with putting a baby in me.

It was the second week in your plan when I realized my birth control pills had gone missing. I tore the house apart and felt slightly crazy when it didn't turn up. It was an easy enough fix to call the doctor and get a new prescription but when I came in holding the brown pharmacy bag you were so angry.

That’s when I realized you were serious about putting a baby in me.

We had been together for seven years, Married for five of them. But I was still surprised you were willing to share me with kids. I had thought maybe when we were in our 40s there might be a couple dogs but never children.

I was overwhelmed and slept at my mothers house thag night to think about it.

Maybe it wasn’t about you wanting to share me but more about me wondering if I could share you anymore. There was already the band taking up so much time and when you weren’t with the band you seemed to still be doing something with music. I was needy and needed your attention too.

Could I really share you with little carbon copies of you?

Could there be anything cuter than mini little Nikki’s running around?

When I woke up the next morning to the revving of a motorcycle outside I knew we were both on the same page now. I held onto you as we made our way home and started the next chapter of our life.

You make me so complete

With the things you do

And the music's sweet

You make me feel brand new

I hear the sound

Songs start coming through

Somehow I know

That you're a dream come true

I was only 24 when we decided to have a baby, so I thought getting pregnant would be easy. And then I turned 25 and it still wasn’t happening.

I felt like I was disappointing you.

You never asked me for anything and now the one thing you wanted I couldn’t give you. I was getting myself into this deep darkness, stacking my worth into my reproduction.

The doctors couldn’t find anything wrong, which made it worse because no one could help.

And then one morning I woke up and felt different. It was like my body was going through a growth spurt. I ached in weird places. It was like someone punched my right in the boobs.

You were doing a couple shows in Canada but would be home that weekend so I didn’t want to call the hotel and complain about how shitty I felt.

I spent the whole day in bed watching shitty Soap Operas and drinking water and peanut butter, the only things that didn't make my stomach lurch.

When I woke up the next morning feeling nauseous and sore I called the doctor. All I needed was to get the flu and then get you sick. You were such a big baby when you had the slightest cold.

I sat in the cold doctors room, on the table. I needed to call you. I had missed your call last night because I had fallen asleep early. When I called the hotel this morning you were already out. My mind was too busy thinking of you when the doctor came in and told me what was wrong.

I was pregnant.

Six weeks. For six weeks I had been carrying your baby and I didn’t know.

The doctor said it would be a great weekend to tell you. It was going to be Father’s Day.

My heart was pumping as I went home. My hand on my stomach as I held my baby. Rubbing the flat area that would soon be a bump.

It was a Friday and you’d be flying in tomorrow afternoon. How was I supposed to keep this a secret? It was everything we wanted. But I knew that I wanted to make it special for you.

You had been so patient in this and now it was finally happening.

It takes my breath

When it sounds that way

Seems like you

Chase the clouds away

And I feel so good

Each and every day

And life is good

Each and every way

Sunday morning I woke up wrapped up in you. Our limbs entwined as you held me close. I didn’t want to get up but I knew I had to.

I got up and groaned. Watching the way you sat up concerned, asking if I was okay.

I told you I was still feeling a little sick. I had filled you in on all the information about how I was sick and not feeling well. I even told you about the doctor's visit. Which leads to now.

I left the room pretending to call the doctor. Even though I had paid a ton of money to get them to be open on Sunday for your surprise. When I came back to the bedroom you were on the edge of the bed, eyes looking at me with nervousness as I told you I needed to go to the doctor.

Of course you agreed to go with me. Holding my hand on the drive and even coming into the room with me.

The doctor said he wanted to do an ultrasound just to check on what was going on in my stomach.

And that’s when the loud booming of a heartbeat filled the room.

Your eyes went from my face to the screen where our little bean was making all that noise, just like their daddy.

Your hand squeezed mine as you realized what you were looking at. I swear your eyes teared up and my heart was beating a million miles a minute. Your free hand slid up onto my stomach as you held our baby.

Our baby, Nikki.

Now I feel the beat

Of the dancing drums

And now I know we're

Gonna have some fun

Now the time stands still

And the blues are through

And now I know

What I'm gonna do

Nine months.

It was nine months of you being practically glued to my side. Every ultrasound, all the pregnancy yoga, the million pictures you wanted to take of me, pulling me out of bed when I was so round I couldn’t even sit up alone.

Every step of the way, we were in it together.

Except now. You had to go to a show tonight before taking a couple months off. You wanted me to go but the idea of people seeing me look like a blimp wasn’t exactly my idea of a good night. Going to get a strawberry milkshake was exactly how I wanted to spend my night.

I was just pulling out of the drive through, sipping the ice cream and it happened.

The warm water slid down my thighs, over the leather seats of your Porsche. You were going to love getting the car cleaned after this.

Usually I would panic in these situations but I had been having the small fluttering contractions for weeks. Plus we had taken that birth class together where we learned about how long labor actually takes.

Did it feel great to start labor well driving your Porsche to the show to go get you? No. BUt my mind was so focused on getting to you I was sure that I could I’d make it.

Ten minutes to the venue, Three minutes to rock back and forth to propel myself out of the car, Five minutes to clean myself up and throw on your red leather jacket over the tight black dress I was wearing with my converses, Nine minutes to make it backstage.

My hand was on my back trying to count the time between the contractions which were feeling more intense than I expected. I could see the side stage that I would need to waddle over to but it might as well have been ten miles away.

The opening chords to Use it or Lose it started to play, making me smile. It was one of my favorite songs. Someone helped me over to the side of the stage and I watched Nikki spinning around.

You looked so happy as you slammed on your bass, running around the stage and leaning out to the fans. As much as I wanted to have someone run on stage and let you know your wife was in labor I wanted this moment.

This was your last show before you became a dad and I wanted you to have the moment without worrying about me.

I pushed out of the chair making my way to the payphone and calling the doctor's office to let them know that I was in labor and I’d be heading to the hospital in about a half hour. As I hung up another tight, sharp pain ripped through me. My hand gripped the edge of the phone.

Hang on, Baby Sixx. We’re going to meet you soon.

You bounced towards me, your big smile on your face until you realized the grimace I was giving you and the realization of what was going on hit you.

I don’t know how we made it to the hospital without flipping the car or getting a speeding ticket but you were helping me in the front door fifteen minutes after leaving the show.

It was 1:53AM when he was born. Jackson James Sixx. 8 lbs 1oz, 22 in long.

Holding your son for the first time was one of the best things I’ve ever seen. He was so little in your arms but the love between you was so big. The way you crawled into bed, wrapping yourself around us. It was the three of us together now.

And it was everything I wanted and more.

And I feel so good

Each and every way

And life is good

Each and every day

#Nikki Fucking Sixx #Nikki Sixx #Nikki Sixx headcanon #Nikki Sixx Imagine #Nikki Sixx Fanfic #Nikki Sixx writing #a-z writing

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