#to migrate

[never-quite-buried]

Nope now it’s at the point that i’m shocked that people off tt don’t know what’s going down. I have no reach but i’ll sum it up anyway.

SCOTUS is hearing on the constitutionality of the ban as tiktok and creators are arguing that it is a violation of our first amendment rights to free speech, freedom of the press and freedom to assemble.

SCOTUS: tiktok bad, big security concern because china bad!

Tiktok lawyers: if china is such a concern why are you singling us out? Why not SHEIN or temu which collect far more information and are less transparent with their users?

SCOTUS (out loud): well you see we don’t like how users are communicating with each other, it’s making them more anti-american and china could disseminate pro china propaganda (get it? They literally said they do not like how we Speak or how we Assemble. Independent journalists reach their audience on tt meaning they have Press they want to suppress)

Tiktok users: this is fucking bullshit i don’t want to lose this community what should we do? We don’t want to go to meta or x because they both lobbied congress to ban tiktok (free market capitalism amirite? Paying off your local congressmen to suppress the competition is totally what the free market is about) but nothing else is like TikTok

A few users: what about xiaohongshu? It’s the Chinese version of tiktok (not quite, douyin is the chinese tiktok but it’s primarily for younger users so xiaohongshu was chosen)

16 hours later:

Tiktok as a community has chosen to collectively migrate TO a chinese owned app that is purely in Chinese out of utter spite and contempt for meta/x and the gov that is backing them.

My fyp is a mix of “i would rather mail memes to my friends than ever return to instagram reels” and “i will xerox my data to xi jinping myself i do not care i share my ss# with 5 other people anyway” and “im just getting ready for my day with my chinese made coffee maker and my Chinese made blowdryer and my chinese made clothing and listening to a podcast on my chinese made phone and get in my car running on chinese manufactured microchips but logging into a chinese social media? Too much for our gov!” etc.

So the government was scared that tiktok was creating a sense of class consciousness and tried to kill it but by doing so they sent us all to xiaohongshu. And now? Oh it’s adorable seeing this gov-manufactured divide be crossed in such a way.

This is adorable and so not what they were expecting. Im sure they were expecting a reluctant return to reels and shorts to fill the void but tiktokers said fuck that, we will forge connections across the world. Who you tell me is my enemy i will make my friend. That’s pretty damn cool.

[catherine-clover]

Edit from the future: well, this is still at the top of #reddit migration, so might as well pass on what I've learned to others.

Here's how to become a Tumbler

Find a hill

Fall to the ground in such a manner that angular momentum overtakes usual control of your body

Click the reblog button because that was a funny joke

Upvotes are reblogs. Likes are for saving really good posts, or just for something good that you can't share. Reblog more than you like to keep the site alive. There is almost no Algorithm on here, likes do almost nothing

Never, ever, ever underestimate how terminally online active Tumblr users are

Going viral is bad on this website. Your notifications will be ruined forever

No one cares how many followers you have

Change your profile picture immediately or everyone will assume you're a bot and block you

I'm stealing a lot of these tips secondhand but I promise I haven't read any in at least a year. They just came at a very pivotal time ok? I rember

#196 is your friend

Open your settings

Disable endless scrolling

Enable timestamps

Disable best stuff first

Search something you're interested in

Not too specific though

Tumblr search is the worst in the business

Find the most popular tag for that interest

Reblog posts from the tag

If someone makes a lot of good posts, follow them

Make some posts to the tag

If you and someone else both follow each other, you two are mutuals. Mutuals are treasure. Value their bond

Always reblog good art

Always reblog heritage posts

I like your shoelaces

Strange Æons killed the Muppet Joker at DashConTwo in the Ball Pit

more milk per milk

The queer tags are full of porn

DashCon was the greatest failure

DashCon was the greatest success

Our website's CEO is a dick too :/

Discourse is Hell. Do not involve

Everyone loves @charl0ttan

DNIs are not worthy of respect

Unless it's minors dni that one is actually important for legal reasons. Do do that one. Don't endanger 18+ accounts

Block or shut up

Do not feed the trolls

Homestuck will never die

You will see many posts here that you previously only ever saw in screenshots

Have fun

Good luck

[troythecatfish]

[ph-cutie]

is wet&wild liquid eyeliner part of the male dungeongoer starter kit or something

[thicc-astronaut]

commensalism between slime monsters and certain varieties of fish

[ouroborosorder]

Hey everyone. *catches basketball thrown from offscreen.* We have a lot of fun here *catches basketball thrown from offscreen* but I just want to remind everyone that this account is about one thing and one thing only. *catches basketball thrown from offscreen.* finding a way to break my infinite basketball curse

[phlebasthebroenician]

[bondboy8]

My friend sent me this screencap from reddit and I can't get over how normal this reply would feel on tumblr

[protoctist]

i know ryoko kui is a real one because she wrote 97+ chapters of a manga about fantasy ecosystems and food chains and not once did she write the phrase "survival of the fittest" (it's a bad phrase) (it's a social darwinist phrase even) (hated amongst biologists) (doesn't make sense) (darwin didn't use it) (coined by an business major) (one of the worst phrases in pop science) (no good)

[gremmlingamer]

[my-midlife-crisis]

[littlestpersimmon]

Stargazer, Stargazer

[graceashcroft]

STAR WARS: EPISODE IV - A NEW HOPE (1977)

dir. George Lucas

[itsolie]

i can’t endlessly retweet the original since i uninstalled stupid bird app, so i’m posting it here to endlessly reblog instead

[darlenexcx]

funny thing you can do with those new sponsored wordpress-blaze ad posts that keep on popping up randomly

you can just block them using your filtered post content words.

(although it would be a better idea to block "wordpress-blaze" rather than what I did before)