#trying to settle this man's ego and get a substantiative conversation out of him

[fadewalking]

no more difficult watch than an older man throwing an absolute fit at someone so much younger just because he dared question his ideas

[sly-merlin]

KILLING ME - 4

(minor friendly chapter)

pairing : law student! Reader + yuta

Genre : angst, mafia au/arranged marriage au

Warnings : none.

Words : 5k

Summary:

"life's never fair y/n. Realise it as soon as you can. It is the only secret for living a regretless life."

Or

"curiosity got the cat hitched"

K.m masterlist

A/n : this series is totally minor friendly now. ✨

Previous morning in Taeyong’s office

“What was that for!” taeyong questioned jaehyun, clearly annoyed by his previous hostile mannerisms towards you. Jaehyun was on the receiving end of taeyong’s infuriation immediately after you departed from his office with doyoung.

“What!?” Jaehyun tried to act oblivious to Taeyong's accusations.

“Why were you trying to scare her? Escort ring! For fucks sake Jae, I expected better from you.”

“But it wasn’t a dead loss. And even you went along in the same wagon, so don’t put everything on me alone.” Jaehyun justified himself by shrugging his shoulders lightly. “And admit it! She was giving you a hard time. That bitch was not buying anything!

Taeyong knew jaehyun was right. Your unsatisfied replies and never ending enquiries were exasperating him, but he would rather preserve his precious ego than admitting that to jaehyun.

He ruffled his well-made hair before replying to Jaehyun, who was expecting some gratitude with a smug face.

“I-- just be careful and refrain from doing and saying anything that might put a dent in my plan. It’s a chance Neo would never get again. So be patient and don’t go around opening your mouth about this to anyone.” jaehyun reluctantly nodded,not hearing what he wanted but his affirmation calmed taeyong’s nerves. He couldn’t trust jaehyun entirely but his options were limited.

All the pieces were in the right place, for now. Nothing could go south right!

But jaehyun couldn’t completely understand the rationale behind Taeyong’s design.

and nor could the figure standing outside, completely hidden from the insiders.

The dread of the forthcoming finals substantiated the shortage of vacant seats in the kwanjeong library. You tried your best to arrive as expeditiously as possible for a person who partied, got abducted, arranged her own marriage, and again partied in grief, all in spam of about 34 hours. Finding no available seat, you decided to settle down on the floor. You gulped your cup of Americano in one go and began with the donut. As per a wise saying, Caffeine and sugar were the best combination as a breakfast for someone trying to get through their day with only 4 hours of sleep, the intellect being none other than your own self!

Yesterday was a pretty long day. Though you were worn out from the adventures with wonwoo last night, your brain wasn’t exhausted enough to shut down properly when you tried to close your eyes.The flashes of the events had shrouded you with a mixture of regrets and worries. What was the guarantee that you won’t end up dead tomorrow! What if taeyong was lying! But the fact regarding moon industries was absolutely legible. Maybe you should get a restraining order or something! But the existence of a person is necessary for that and yuta was a fucking corporate in the public eye and you were sure taeyong held some powerful position in the rich hierarchy as well, otherwise, covering the shits without revealing their true identities was not the job of some measly gang leader. There was more to taeyong than what someone could perceive just by looking. Will you be considered one of them now! After the little stunt that landed you straight into yuta’s life, you weren’t sure that he’d not strangle you in sleep. And What were you going to say to them? Chelin, yeom, guk, yeong.

and your thoughts spiralled from taeyong,yuta towards chelin and your friends and didn’t rest anytime before 4a.m. Waking up at 8 sharp , you took a shower and made your way towards the library.

And now you were here. 2 students passed your figure indicating that there were 2 vacant seats. Finally, after 15 minutes. They might have been the overnight students, you thought and walked inside before anyone else could claim the treasure. You had to find a new topic of thesis and do some research for an international paper your professor was writing, and you being his designated so-called subordinate had to help him, involuntarily of course. But in this world, the student who could refuse their professor’s demands was yet to be born! Marking the place by placing your bag, you started the search for last month’ law journals and digests. One and a half hours passed, but you couldn’t find anything on the international court of justice i.e. what your professor hadn’t already included. The urge to go out was profusely weighed down by your own sentiment of avoiding your friends. So you decided in favour of swallowing the bitter pill.

5 hours passed. The vibration of the timer in your phone prompted you to run off and get some food. It was already 2:30 and the lack of real food was making the tasks harder than they already were. Stepping outside into fresh air, instant regret of not bringing an umbrella washed over you. The sun was too bright unlike your mood and walking all the way to your favourite canteen would end up in you getting another headache. But you silently wished that every being from yesterday’s party was suffering from the same treatment of the over-the-top optimistic planet. why to suffer alone!

“Shortie” you lifted your head, spotting the combo of buy 1 get 1 free, heading your way.

“Where were you the whole day? And if you aren’t going to pick calls then please do that poor thing a favour and sell it!” yugyeom barked while running his hand through his hair.

You shrugged jungkook’s elbow from your shoulder and replied “I was busy with prof. Joong’s work. And I have to be somewhere after 4 so I was a bit-

“Joong should adopt you already man!” Jungkook interrupted, nudging your sides with his fingers.

“ but I thought he wanted to be her sugar daddy!” At that gyeom gave a serious and stern look to kook, pretending to ponder over his statement for a second and then suddenly they both started laughing, hands hitting you everywhere to support their doubling figures.

“Get away from me, idiots!” you shouted, trying to get away from them. Once they were done with showing their exaggerated emotions, you all giggled together in unison. they were wearing their fundraiser t-shirts, you noticed.

“When is the fundraiser?”

“At 5. But you won’t be there to support us cause you are busy with your daddy!” kook exclaimed while bumping your shoulder with his arm.

“I didn’t say I’m going for Joong’s work and no, he’s not my sugar daddy, doofus. I’m busy with tutoring. I missed someone’s Saturday class so—

“Okay, chill tiger. You need to breathe. It’s a boring event anyway.” gyeom said in a comforting tone, interjecting your rapid fire speech.

“I’m gonna have lunch, are you two going?” you suggested.

“Yeah, it’s our break and Yeong and Minjun have eaten already, so that leaves you!” kook pouted when gyeom mentioned his boyfriend’s name.

“Let’s go! I want my sugar” your dramatic pout made yugyeom pet your hair lovingly and the three of you started walking on a stone pathway on the way to the canteen.

“Where’s your umbrella?” jungkook asked you. He knew how much you hated walking under the sun after the drinking escapades.

“I forgot but let’s not talk about it. it’s making me grumpy.”

“Okay! but why don’t you cover your head with that scarf instead.” he said pointing towards the silky material around your neck.

“Naahh, it ruins my fashion” they gave each other a puzzled look, shrugging their shoulders for they both couldn’t gather the reason for your weird behaviour.

At lunch, you talked to them about the fundraiser and gave your own contribution for the noble cause. The conversation with them progressed too easily and for about an hour you forgot about the turmoil in your life, which was still unknown to them.

After parting away, you went straight to your professor to show him your progress. He took note of the materials you found on recent cases and dismissed you without showing any gratitude. Not even a word of appreciation.

A ping!

Jaemin: noona, doyoung hyung is picking you up at 4 but he won’t enter the campus. Be out at 4!

You let out a frustrated groan at his text. You had only met him once, when he conferred upon you the honour of connecting your phone to his server but that was not the only favour you received! He also saved his contact number with various hearts that you obviously removed after reaching home. you could only pray to heavens that he won’t be there today as well!

You made your way to the library again, this time to work on your thesis. The time passed faster than you thought. The alarm you placed earlier vibrated, indicating it was 4 already! You hastily made your bag and ran out of the library. It took 10 minutes to reach the gates of the campus. When you passed your dorms building, the idea of ditching doyoung and going to bed sounded tempting but as usual, nothing was going your way these days. You felt like the old catch 22 was in action.

You passed through the gates and looked around the road to find doyoung's car but he was nowhere to be seen. While you were scanning the whole area, a low voice called your attention.

“What are you finding, I’m right here under your nose” a voice said through gritted teeth.

Yes, he was indeed sitting in the car right in front of you and the only one you missed apparently. You walked around the car to sit on the passenger seat, the tinted windows hiding you from the outside funfair.

“What took you so long? It's 4:15 already.”

“I don’t have a car like you so I walked myself here and it’s not like I did it purposely anyway.” You contended, the annoyance in your voice matching his own.

“Whatever, we are already late so turn around. Taeyong would be mad.”

“No I’m not turning around. First that cloth bag, then the handkerchief you tied on my eyes yesterday, its painful man. I’ll lose my eyesight this way. And I can navigate the whole city from this place, you can’t hide your dungeon from me now” you reasoned. He didn’t tie your hands yesterday but your eyes were still covered.

“Then give me your scarf. I’ll cover your eyes with your own choice of article. It’s not painful or else you won’t be wearing it right! he said mockingly, pointing towards your neck.

“Umm, this scarf is act-

“Give me that already. I have some other things to handle as well.” assessing your options, you hesitantly removed the scarf, turning around to face the window immediately. Doyoung tied it across your eyes, checking the knot twice and tapped your shoulder. As you turned around, doyoung’s doe eyes widened, if that was even possible. Your collarbone and neck, which was visible through your v neck top, was covered with pretty purplish bruises. You fidgeted with your hands, flustered, feeling his eyes on you. But he remained quiet, focusing on the task at hand.

The whole drive was quiet and though your hands were not tied, you kept them on your backpack, hesitant to start any conversation. The car stopped finally, the mixed feelings coming back. The same process followed. He guided you inside but this time you passed only one door and the walk was quite shorter as well.

As doyoung was about to remove your scarf, a hand stopped him, or that was what you understood from the movements at that time.

“Silky scarf, blindfold and hickies haan! Being kinky doyoungie. She’s your sister-in-law. Show some respect boy!” a voice remarked, the air around your face suddenly filled with chocolate and coffee. You hiccupped all of a sudden, earning a chuckle from the unknown presence.

You tried to reach for the blindfold, but your hands were caught mid-air, the said hands removing it. You blinked your eyes a few times to make out the figure’s face. He was standing, mostly bending to match your stature, face smiling to show all of his teeth.

Yuta.

You, surprised, took a step back but instead bumped into the one behind you.

“I’ll take over from here, doyoung.” but fortunately, he didn’t budge. Your hold on the backpack tightened, your eyes lowered to avoid his gaze. The only thing in your view were his baggy pants and white sports shoes.

But yuta could see only you and nothing else. Taeyong wasn’t the only one awaiting your arrival. Yuta was equally anticipating you. His night was just as sleepless and anxious as you. He was afterall at the other end of the rope.

He raised your head, fingertips lightly grazing your chin. His hooded eyes roamed around your face like he was expecting you to show some contempt , hatred,nervousness! He straightened up abruptly and started tying the silk around your neck. You flinched at his touch but he remained void of any reaction. His half denim jacket and white t-shirt hid you from the surroundings, his arms almost engulfing you. He repositioned himself to match your height again, arms crossing against his chest.

“Looks like someone had a fun night.” and in a second, his honey smile changed into a smirk, letting go of any trace of earlier softer expressions. And the look on his face was enough to scare the shit out of anyone.

“Stop yuta” a taller man you recognised from yesterday as Johnny, pushed yuta aside from your view. It was then you saw that everyone was there. Including the one you were yet to encounter.

Your eyes wandered from one side to the other. Johnny let you inspect.

“Doyoung, what was the need to cover her eyes?” Johnny whispered to doyoung, breaking your trance.

“Why is everyone nagging me so much” he whined in a screeching voice.

“Karma bitch” Johnny pointed his forefinger towards him before giving his attention to you.

“Hey, how are you y/n.” he asked, his cheerful voice totally in contrast with the weather of the room.

“I’m- ummm.” you cleared your throat before continuing. “I’m fine Johnny. As fine I can be.” you mumbled the last part but he surely heard you.

“You remembered my name!” he clapped, his eyes turning into crescents. You gave him a tight lipped smile in return, waiting for some instructions. As if on cue, taeyong’s loud voice graced your ears.

“Come y/n. make yourself comfortable” he indicated towards the couches that were almost already occupied. Johnny gestured to you to proceed, walking with you. You passed yuta who was still smirking and sat on the single seat available next to taeyong. You placed your backpack on the large table in the middle of the room. It looked like a normal living room for guests, just with too many couches to accommodate the gang. You felt like an uninvited because apparently everybody was watching you like a hawk. Their stares changed sight only when yuta came to take a seat on one of the couches, exactly opposite to yours. You met his eyes briefly before turning your face towards your bag again.

Who knew the rusty zips of your bag were so interesting!

“So y/n I thought you should meet everyone. You are going to be part of this family soon. Better get acquainted with all.” taeyong addressed you while he sat on his couch majestically like a king. You heard a dry laugh and if you had to guess it had to be from jaehyun or yuta.

You didn’t understand why he wanted that. You were just a risk till yesterday and now means to discipline yuta.

And why all the formalities if you were gonna leave anyway.

“I’m going to leave anyway, taeyong. So I don’t see a need to do it!

You were too consumed to notice how your sentence turned all the heads around you. Some started giving side eyes to each other. There was something they were all missing.

“I said you could leave. But not without my permission. So, you’d be stuck for now, maybe till months or years.”

You gulped at his words. Taeyong turned your only hope into a distant dream. Maybe you were too foolish to gauge the situation.

“You want something to eat or drink before we continue” he asked in a sincere voice. Shaking your head, you rubbed your eyes with the palms of your hands to stop them from moistening. There was nothing more embarrassing than to cry in front of a bunch of strangers who didn’t give a shit about you.

“No, please continue.” you emphasised again to not draw any more attention to yourself than already was. And you internally thanked Taeyong who continued as if you weren’t just gonna cry!

“You will move in with yuta on Saturday,” it was Monday. “The wedding ceremony would be held in the morning. So you have a few days to prepare, everything from your dress to every other thing you need shall be arranged. Just name it and you’ll have it!”

Wedding ceremony! That was not on the plate!

“I don’t want a cerem-

“Leave the bullshit ta-

You and yuta both cut off each other simultaneously. You glanced at his side, finding him already piercing his gaze into yours.

“There’s no need for it. The paper signing is enough. It’s not like we are in-

You knew taeyong understood what you were trying to say, so you didn’t continue. But you were already having a feeling of superiority over yuta for being the first to offer your opinion. It felt like a payback for flustering you earlier. You refrained from facing him again, your body turned towards taeyong only, but you felt satisfied with the thought of him being riled up.

“Oh, but I want a ceremony taeyong and mark is going to be the best man. He’s so excited. You can’t do that to him!” yuta emphasised through the variation in his voice. You knew he changed his argument purposely , but you maintain your cool, opting to ignore him . bear and forbear.

Taeyong raised his eyebrow at you but you shook your head again.

“I don’t think it’d be a good idea. It’s not a normal one anyway so why pretend!” you held your ground.

“You aren’t getting married to a mannequin.” yuta retracted. “I’m getting married as well and don’t anyone dare say that I made a mistake and blah blah. At last I’ll be hitching so I want a ceremony and Japanese at that!”

Oh yeah, he was Japanese. You have missed that as well.

All the other men in the room, 9 to be exact, were nodding at everything that was being said. They were unable to decide whose argument was worth taking side for. Finally Johnny spoke-

“I think y/n is right” looking at nowhere in particular, he continued. “What’s with pomp and show when it’s nothing more than an agreement”

“But if yuta hyung wants it, then why not. They are going to live together, he should have his say as well.” It was Mark who took yuta’s side. He didn’t know why but watching yuta losing ground urged him to support his brother.

You looked briefly at the boy who just argued with Johnny.

“He’s mark y/n.” taeyong said the answer you were looking for. “And he’s Jungwoo, jeno, doyoung, you have already met him, then jaehyun, johnny, renjunie, hendery. Others are busy so you’ll meet them some other day probably.”

A few waved towards you, including Mark, who shyly withdrew his hand quickly. They all probably hated you as there was no other reaction towards a person who almost put your life in danger!

“Can we get to a middle ground now? I’m already getting tired of this” jaehyun grumbled, leaning into the couch.

“Ok so, he wants a celebration of a lie! What about me then? You are all here but I have no one. I’m alone and probably will be. Because taeyong, you haven’t told me how am I going to reveal this to my friends? I may not have a family, but still there are people close to me. They are my best friends, roommate, and many others who need to know! How am I going to explain to them that their friend who didn’t even have a boyfriend, is getting married suddenly? I don’t even have parents to cover it with an arranged marriage. How to convince them? Give me a way and I’ll agree” you pointed out the very important detail that they were missing. But they needed to know that there was other side of the paper as well and your reasons were not just a cry in the wilderness.

Nobody made a sound. Everything went quite like a dark night until-

“I hope this is not the calm before a storm!” you looked over to see the person who broke the silence. It was another young man coming with a food trolley, probably from the kitchen.

“I thought we have a guest so I prepared some coffee and donuts. I hope you like sweets y/n” the man was smiling ear to ear, seeming too happy with your visit.

“I-

“I’m kun.” he introduced himself and you shook his hand. He seemed too polite for a criminal. “Have this and tell me how it is” he forcibly handed you a dessert plate with a chocolate glazed donut. You took it out of politeness but felt a bit weird to be the only one eating it. You watched him with quizzical eyes as he took one for himself and sat on the arm of your couch. Everyone was now staring at your movements.

“Eat it, eat it. These are for you and me only.” he cajoled.

You decided to take a bite and then place it back just to stop the awkwardness.

As you bit it from one side, your brain short circuited. “Holy shit, bro. What is this sorcery.” your genuine and innocent reaction made Kun laugh loudly, some of the others joined in as well.

“Thank god, you like it! I’m so glad you aren’t one of weight conscious ones, otherwise it’d have been weird.” he started munching on his own piece.

“I’m a sugar bear. I can’t live without sugar. I just had a donut in the morning but it was bleh compared to this. You are a master chef bro.” and for a minute you forgot the previous tense environment. Everyone was glad that Kun came to save the situation and except to you, it was known that obviously he heard everything from the kitchen.

“You ate one in the morning! Then it’s the last one you’re getting. Everyone help yourself. She’s not having any more!” as if they were waiting, everyone except mark and yuta picked them up.

“Mark” Kun motioned towards the tray and he grabbed one as well.

“What if I was allergic to chocolate, kun” you asked him while finishing your treat.

“Oh please! Even ten eats it.” he laughed to himself at his reference, which went over your head.

“Now coming to the point.” Everyone looked at taeyong who was already done with eating. “Y/n doesn’t want anything special so it’ll happen like that. No!yuta, lemma speak. And you y/n, it’s upon you to make your friends believe. Make up a story or do whatever you want. You don’t want to tell them about the wedding. Fine with me but do let them know at least that you have a boyfriend that you are moving in with! It’s on you both to make this arrangement believable.

“okay , sho now I shuggenly hab a voyfiend” you started speaking without even finishing the bite in your mouth. you continued once you chewed it.

“won't they be suspicious. They know exactly what I do and what I don’t. It’s almost impossible to put a façade in front of them.”

“Oh please, don’t tell me they even know from where you got those hickies” jaehyun’s curt statement was a hit below the belt. Kun was about to scold him when you elaborated his statement further to prove that he was doing nothing but burning his own fingers.

“Yes, actually they happen to know. When, where and from whom I got these. Anything else you want to ask?.” he rolled his eyes on your reply, busing himself with the delicacy instead.

“They don’t know yuta. So if you want you can introduce him to your people. He won’t be posing any problem, take my word for it.”

“I’ll go with you if you also accompany me,that I guess would be a problem for you. You don’t want to be seen with a criminal, or do you!” yuta jabbered. He was trying to push your buttons to measure your limit. But little did he know that you were far from being that easy.

“I just said I don’t want a wedding. I’ll agree to anything that is reasonable and is not degrading to me.”

“Ok then, nobody would force you to do what you don’t want.” Taeyong decided to take matters into his own hands now. “And we’ll organise a small, very intimate gathering at taeil’s office to celebrate as yuta wants. And you’ll be introduced as Mrs. Nakamoto to our corporate world.” taeyong finished gauging both of your reactions. The surname was foreign and cringing to you. But it was going to be yours, so there was nothing you could do, for now.

“What do you mean ‘our’ corporate world.” you got puzzled at his choice of words.

“You’ll find out soon and it's nothing scary, don’t worry.” Kun responded on behalf of taeyong this time, handing you your cup of coffee. “Tell me if it’s cold, I’ll-

“No it’s totally fine.” you assured him, without even taking a sip. He was being nice enough already.

“If my opinion has no value, then what am I even doing here!” yuta shouted, getting up from the seat.

“yut-

Before Kun could say anything, he stormed off. Mark tried to follow but taeyong stopped him from doing that.

“Don’t mind him. He’s a hot head.” Johnny laughed in between his bites.

You only nodded, sipping your coffee. You were glad he was gone. Sugar has always done wonders for you and it was having the same effects now as well. You were able to think more rationally now.

“One more thing” you furrowed your brows at taeyong. What was left now! “Do you want any specifications in the house? It’s my responsibility. A wedding gift you can say. If you need anything like extra closet, a more spacious kitchen-

“Kitchen?” you let out a brief chuckle at that. Everyone’s eyes were on you now. “It’ll be totally fine if I don’t even get a kitchen. I can’t cook anything besides ramyeon and salads. So I won’t even need that.”

“You are a student. Don’t you know anything basic.” It was Jungwoo who spoke in the sweeter voice than Kun's.

“No. I grew up in an orphanage and they provided us everything. I left when I started law. So all in all, I never had anyone to teach me. That’s why if you want to know best food trucks and restaurants in the city, I’m your best option.but, if that yuta knows how to cook, ask him about the kitchen.” you spoke nonchalantly .But you didn’t realise how uncomfortable the air had become. a heavy silence took over the light atmosphere.

“I’m sorry noona” Jungwoo apologised sheepishly.

“It’s fine. After all there are some things that your hacker can’t find out. only I can tell you those.” saying that, you faced taeyong again. “But if you insist, I can always use a study room.” you tried to enlighten the mood again.,ppp

“Ok. I’ll find something suitable for you both.” you hummed, not knowing what to say anymore.

“Can I go back now?”

“Yes, doyoung will drop you.”

“No, I’ll go with her.” Johnny said, grabbing your attention. He didn’t look sulky like doyoung so, it’d be fine, you guess.

They said you goodbyes. Mark seemed hesitant to even look at you, but you couldn’t care less. He was just a stranger after all.

Yuta couldn’t realise why everyone was trying to be so nice to you. Till yesterday, he was allowed to put a gun on her head but now every being was against him. He didn’t know why he was so furious at Taeyong, to force him to marry you or for dragging Mark into this mess. Taeyong knew how to play dirty, but yuta never thought he’d use his own brother. There was no option for him as well, as taeyong has said. He showed interest in a fucking celebration to contradict you, but you were not backing down and that felt like a punch to his gut.

He drove towards his stress reliever. The infamous Japanese club, the only place where he could drown his sorrows.

The club was packed despite it being Monday. That was one thing he liked about it, you’ll never be disappointed in this place.

“ゆた!” The hostess chimed seeing yuta. “久しぶり” [ long time, no see!]

He signed her to give him 2 shots. She did as told but her gaze was following yuta’s, which rested on her cleavage. He came here only for 2 things after all.

He gulped the drink in a second without blinking an eye.

“バックルーム” [ back room]

She wasn’t someone to be told twice. She handed her hand towel to her co-worker and followed the path. Who was she to reject him after all?

He drove back silently again. The relief he felt was all dissipated now. Instead his mind was already wandering towards you. Your headstrong attitude was troubling him. his plans were all down and out. He hated you , from the moment he laid his eyes on you. You acted like you were invincible but he knew it was just a mask to protect yourself.

He had noticed how you rubbed your eyes to hide your disappointment for you didn’t want to appear weak. All he had to do now was to find a vulnerable part of you, to hit you where it’d hurt the most. It’d be last time he lost to you.

Afterall, beginning is always easy, it is continuing that’s hard!

[mirajens]

title: like we used to do rating: t pairing: shiro/allura found: ff.n and ao3 note: this was my submission for the 2nd issue of @shallurazine <3 

The set of Allura's lips tells Shiro what he already knows but has been disregarding for the past couple of hours since he decided to leave his house and show up in pajamas to her door: that this is a bad idea.

The door is only opened a sliver so that half of Allura's body can be seen while her left leg blocks the door from the inside, a habit formed from never installing a chain guard despite living in an apartment on the sketchier part of the student town.

It stings, how there is a physical wall (or door, if one pays attentions to technicalities) to remind him of the metaphoric one between them, and not for the first time, Shiro grieves for how things have changed.

He shifts and with long limbs in loose-fitting night clothes, he projects how nervous he feels. He opens his mouth to say something until his brain decides that he can't say something eloquent so he shrugs instead, his mechanical arm whirring faintly, his chin jutting to the seventy-dollar memory foam pillow under his hand.

Allura, from her side of the door, understands for the most part. And she understands quite a lot more than the obvious request for another sleepover. It's been two months. Divided into three installments of detachment relapse, it's really not enough time or opportunity to come to terms with what has passed and what is now. It wasn't all Shiro, too. Once it was Allura who came knocking on his door, but that was beside the point.

Allura thinks: Maybe in a few more months, we won't need to find each other anymore. Maybe in a few more months, we can sleep on our own beds and not feel like something is missing. Maybe in a few more months, we can be strangers again.

Just to torture, Allura cocks a pale brow at him, inquisitive of why. It's not that she doesn't know, but she's deprived of Shiro actually telling her what he wants. After everything's been said and done, this is her chance to get him back for it, at the risk of being called petty.

Predictably, Shiro looks annoyed. Do you really want me to say it? Instead, he says, "I couldn't sleep."

To which Allura counters, "And being here will make you sleepy?"

But Allura isn't the only one who wants to settle a score. "I miss you," he replies easily, knowing nothing disarms her more than genuine affection.

Allura opens the door.

The double bed was not made for two full-grown, considerably large adults trying to sleep with miles between them. Alura's bed is pushed to the farthest corner so she takes the side against the wall and Shiro sleeps on the edge. They look foolish with all the space between them, almost as if they're making way for a third person to wedge in between.

Allura wonders if she should say something. She wants to. She wants the air full of talk like it used to be but after all that's passed, they have unlearned their ease and ran out of things to say. How can she miss everything they used to be and not want to do something to get it back at the same time?

Beside her, she can feel Shiro trying to not move so much and breathe only a little. For a big man, he's always trying to take up as little space as he can. Even with his prosthetic detached, his mass makes his side of the bed dip, and the warmth that radiates off him is great. Allura almost admits to herself how much she misses it, but this is already a dangerous territory and there's no need to acknowledge things that they're both trying to bury. Facing his back turned to her, it feels like she's trying to memorize every shape of him before he leaves her again.

When Shiro begins to turn so he can mirror her, Allura closes her eyes. Cowardly, perhaps, but safe. She wonders if she can fake being asleep but Shiro has always said she sucked at it. She can feel his gaze as heavy as a wet blanket.

"Stop staring at me and go to sleep." She says into the thick silence of the room.

She can almost hear his smile in his tone. "You're not someone I'd get sick of staring at."

Allura opens her eyes and tries to see if he is being genuine. It never used to be hard to tell. "A little too late to be flirting with me now, isn't it?"

"I'm sorry I'm here," Shiro finally says.

Allura shakes her head, the clouds of silver hair shifting against her pillowcase. "Not your fault."

"Whose is it, then?"

Allura knows bait when she hears it. It takes a saintly patience not to snap back, not to toss blame, not to say anything at all. Shiro knows who she holds accountable and vice versa.

When Allura doesn't answer, Shiro speaks again. "I wish it doesn't have to be like this."

"You mean you wish we didn't have to be apart anymore?"

"Yeah," he says, then, takes it back. "No. I wish I don't have to want you anymore. I can never not feel like my day is substantial."

Ah, but that stings. Allura tries to swallow past her disappointment and bitterness but both stain her tongue. "You could leave."

"But I can't sleep by myself."

"And is that my problem?" She pedals back, takes on a kinder tone. "How do you expect to forget me when we keep getting together like this?"

As if there's an answer to that. As if there's a logic to why people do these types of cruelty to themselves. "I'm not thinking very clearly."

"No," Allura agrees. "Indeed this is stupid of you."

That's not anything new so he doesn't respond.

"I can't help but miss you." A thousand regrets color his voice, sad and wishful at the same time. "Sometimes I wonder if I just got used to us. But the loss of familiarity can't hurt this much. I keep thinking about what went wrong. It's like we just woke up one day and decided to stop trying to be good people to each other."

Something bitter and miserable catches in Allura's throat, impeding breath like bad heartburn, making yearning burn in her chest. This isn't the first time they've had this conversation but it never gets any easier to stomach. Somehow, she finds the power to speak. "And do you think that we could go back to being good people to each other?"

"I don't know. I don't think we're even the same people we fell in love with." Shiro stirs again, both restless and mild. When he moves and bears down on his pillow, the scent of him lingers delicately. "But if you let me, I'd like to try. I think walking away from you was a mistake I don't want to repeat."

And there it is. Allura does not know she's been waiting for such a thing: a denouement after months of falling action. Resolution isn't a clear happy ending, but it's hopeful for one. Her hand reaches up and crosses the space between them, shattering walls and lines and ego and pride when it touches the curve of his jaw. Her thumb sweeps over the coarse growth of shadow on his cheek and feels warm for the first time since he left. "Then stay," she tells him, simple as that, because moving onwards is just as easy.

[junker-town]

Donald Trump’s Twitter attacks on athletes are falling into a predictable, sinister pattern

The attacks on Lavar Ball and Marshawn Lynch show what the President is trying to do.

The only thing that beats the crassness of the daily Trump tweet that leads to a day of outrage is how predictable his behavior is.

When Marshawn Lynch was shown sitting for the U.S. national anthem and then standing for the Mexican anthem, it was expected that Trump would have something to say about it. He said something because those who protest police brutality are on the list of his enemies and targets. He used Twitter, a social media platform that has failed to take substantial action against bullying and harassment, because it’s his chosen means of communication. And his opinion was loud and dumb because that’s the pattern that he’s set.

Lynch sitting down was also a topic of conversation early in the morning on Fox and Friends, a show that praises Trump and feeds him talking points. The tweet against Lynch came after the story was on the show, which follows a similar pattern with many of Trump’s tweets.

At 6:07 a.m. FOX & Friends highlights Marshawn Lynch story; Trump tweets at 6:25 a.m. https://t.co/Y9yFDsd8bd

— Charlie Spiering (@charliespiering) November 20, 2017

Trump has gone after Colin Kaepernick, LeBron James, Stephen Curry, Jemele Hill and athletes who have decided to take a knee during the anthem in general. Lynch fits right in with those that he has a problem with. It’s worth noting that Steve Kerr, Gregg Popovich and even Eminem have been exempt from his public comments, even though they too have criticized the President, and did so much more forcefully and directly than Lynch did.

This isn’t rocket science. This is the same man that settled a case with the Justice Department over housing discrimination and took a full-page ad to call for the death of five minority kids that were falsely accused of raping a jogger. He doubled down when the kids were proven innocent by DNA evidence, reasoning that if they weren’t guilty of that particular crime, they had to be guilty of something, because “these young men do not exactly have the pasts of angels.”

Trump also endorsed police brutality in July, when he asked police officers not to be too nice with arrested individuals, encouraging officers to hit the head of the arrested on their squad cars. That’s after he claimed that there’s a “war on cops.”

Trump’s attack on Lynch comes right after he called LaVar Ball ungrateful for not thanking him after LiAngelo Ball and two other UCLA players were allowed to leave China after they were arrested for shoplifting. The students were in their hotel on house arrest when Trump mentioned the situation to Chinese president Xi Jinping, but he felt that he was the reason for their freedom and he wanted praise for it. Before the players returned to the States, he tweeted out asking if they would thank him. This was Trump at his most slimy: After doing something for three black athletes, he demanded that he be thanked immediately. He needed to remind them who was in control. The athletes did thank him. But LaVar played down Trump’s role ... and so it was expected that Trump would respond with something crass. Which he did when he tweeted that he should have left the boys in jail.

Steve Kerr thinks that LaVar and Trump should stop being covered because they’re “modern life people.” Two people seeking attention and getting it.

Ball is at least harmless in the grand scheme. His is a case of junk food. He’s stupid entertainment for the sake of entertainment.

Trump is cruel. He has power and uses it to bully people. Everything he does and says, from the malicious to the unintelligible, is in service to his ego and biases. He stands against certain people because he’s always thought that those people were bad, even if they have committed no crime, and he defends others, calls them fine people and ignores their violence because they praise him. He attacks his targets publicly, wields the power of the state against private citizens and tries to influence punishment against them for protesting or speaking out. He has never shown to be anything or think of anyone beyond himself.

Photo by Kevin Dietsch-Pool/Getty Images

He’s boring. He is so egocentric and lacking even in the appearance of being anything more than the human form of desired attention that he can’t be anything else. Efforts to paint him as a mastermind fell apart when we realized there was no larger plan, no grand scheme — he is an old man who wakes up and tweets out what his friends on TV tell him to. Our adoration of money and power and linking status to intelligence couldn’t even hide his true self for that long. He’s a man who bases the substance of everything, including himself, on how popular that thing is. The ratings. The attendance. The crowds.

There’s nothing interesting about someone who can’t think beyond themselves. There is no depth to someone who is that hollow. Someone who has been the same crude and infantile human being for their whole life. Someone who uses his position as the most powerful person in the world to complain about not being thanked by LaVar Ball.

Since everything is ridiculous now, LaVar Ball went on CNN to discuss his refusal to thank Trump. During the interview with Chris Cuomo, Ball asked the host “Why are we even talking about this with all these political matters going on in the world?”

We’re talking about Trump, Ball and Lynch because the President of the United States likes to spend his time attacking athletes and private citizens. Each day he does another ridiculous thing, attacks a person that he’s expected to attack because he’s known to attack certain types of people, enforces his biases, feeds his ego, and we must all go along and give him the attention he craves. That’s the reality and indictment of our world right now.

[rubylocket]

006. papa, où t’es?

title: papa, où t’es? fandom: jojo’s bizarre adventure characters/pairings: jolyne kujo/jotaro kujo rating: r warnings: incest summary: you don’t even have to tell him; he knows what’s hurting you. a/n: obligatory disclaimer that if you’re triggered or repulsed by incest, i urge you not to read further. in writing this, i sought to neither condone nor fetishize the dynamic contained herein. proceed at your own discretion.

[ AO3 mirror ]

“tell me where he came from then i’ll know where to go mama always says when we look hard we’ll find what we have lost”

It didn’t bother her much when she was young ( — in retrospect, it should have).

She would stare at her feet as parents came to pick up their children in the elementary school parking lot — mothers and fathers alike. She waited for her own mother; she knew she would come.

In the meantime, she was forced to hear their conversations. Fathers asking their daughters how their days went; girls laughing and laughing. If daughters were stars, then their fathers were the moon.

Together, always together.

※

Subconsciously, Jolyne’s mind clung to the few vague memories she had of him for dear life.

Through the thick fog of time, she could see them together. Her father, throwing her in the air, flashing a rare grin. Her hand gripping his thumb. Jumping in puddles, the familiar smell of ozone in the aftermath of a storm clinging to the air.

She could never identify with the girl in those visions. After her mother would kiss her forehead and tuck her in, she’d close her eyes and conjure the few recollections she did have in the hopes of reliving them. And yet, they seemed more like scenes from a movie — pages from a novel — than her own lived experiences.

She always wondered what happened between the highlight reel.

※

It was as though a switch had been flipped when she began middle school.

Anger circulated in her veins, latent yet potent, waiting for release. Even as a twelve-year-old, she could recognize the irrationality of it all. There was no reason to pick a fight with that girl in English class who had been giggling over Jolyne’s hair — at the same time, there was no reason not to.

There were rumors, of course. She initially told herself that anybody who was anybody in middle school had rumors go around about them. It became a matter of pride; she was different, and considering the caliber of classmates around her, she was fine with that.

She was fine with that until the instant she heard “daddy issues.”

It was the first time, but it wouldn’t be the last. She recalls it vividly now, even more vividly than any memories of her father himself.

“—Oh my god, tell me about it. Jolyne is such a guy. Do you think she’s gay?”

“Probably. Isn’t her dad a deadbeat or something? I bet she’s weird ‘cause she’s got daddy issues.”

Their words reverberated against the brick walls of the claustrophobic locker room, and all she can remember now is the color red.

Red, red, red — and a flash of blue.

※

And now, many months later, her first year of high school brings good tidings in the form of subpoenas and affidavits.

It’s bad enough that this is happening to begin with, but a vague hope had taken root in her mind as she waited for her mother to come to the police station. An unseen power would intervene — God, her father, both, she doesn’t know.

The hope dies before it even begins to grow as she listens to her mother’s words in the hallway, the hushed pleas and the acidic accusations.

She hangs up, defeated, and Jolyne grips the metal bench so tightly that her knuckles go white.

Her mother comes to collect her; the ride back to their house is silent.

When Jolyne gets home, she shields herself from her mother’s words of concern and takes the stairs two at a time up to her room.

She doesn’t make it to the bed before she collapses to the floor, sobs tearing through her body, a torrent of stowed feelings covered in dust making their way to the surface. She hadn’t been prepared to feel everything all at once — the disappointment, the volcanic rage, the love and years of hunger — not now, not ever.

‘Dad’ disappears from her vocabulary, comfortably replaced by ‘Jotaro.’

※

Years go by and she never gets over it. It eats at her. She thinks of it when she enters the gang, she blames him for every crime committed, every dollar stolen, every person deceived.

As far as she’s concerned, his rap sheet is far longer than hers.

She thinks of him too when she drifts away from that life. How would he react?

Jolyne sits in the grass behind the school, near the track field, and plays with her lighter. She promised her mom that she’d quit the habit as part of her new lifestyle. The sky is so blue — so blue, it hurts her eyes.

She looks at that sky. He’s out there somewhere, too.

(Her conclusion: he wouldn’t react at all.)

※

For all of her transgressions and offenses, she never thought she’d be in a position like this.

Fifteen years. Fifteen years. It ricochets off the walls of her skull and penetrates her dura mater, settling deep into the core of her.

“There’s got to be some mistake!” she shouts as the guards come to collect her. Eyes darting around like a cornered animal, she turns to her lawyer. “You bastard! You said one year!”

They escort her out and the lawyer’s eyes are cold and clinical.

She thinks of the locket. Cold sweat lines her palms.

She unravels.

※

Jolyne shuffles her priorities around given her new circumstances, and she doesn’t think of him as much anymore. It’s a blessing and a curse. She has largely accepted her life now, although she hasn’t given up on the idea of trying to get out.

When someone calls her name and declares that she has a visitor, she can’t mask her surprise. She didn’t think her mom would be ready to see her like this.

She comes out into the visitor area and her heart stops when she sees him again — a split-second reaction caused by the id hijacking the super-ego.

“You,” Jolyne says lowly, clenching and unclenching her fists.

His gaze doesn’t waver.

“I’m here to break you out.”

She scoffs and turns away, arms akimbo, before striding over to the security guard and launching her fist towards his face.

“If I’m lucky, they’ll put me in solitary confinement!” she yells as she continues beating the guard. The crunch of bone satisfies her in a way that it shouldn’t — at least, not anymore. “Then I’ll never have to see your fucking face again!”

He stands there, silent as he bears witness to her assault. Passive. Passive. Passive. As if he could be anything else.

Once she’s had her fill, she spits on the guard and turns to face Jotaro again.

“I don’t know what you were thinking, but are you really trying to redeem yourself now? Trying to play the part of the loving father?”

She manages to summon up the moxie to match his piercing stare. She sees nothing of herself in his face.

Silence. Stunning in how much it says with so little — it’s utilitarian and safe.

“I don’t think you understand,” he says quietly. The gravity of his voice gives her pause.

He tells her exactly what’s happened to her, and she doesn’t know what to do. There’s so much she could do.

So she does the only thing she knows how to do.

“Thanks for the tip, but I think I’ll figure this one out on my own. You know, just like with everything else?” She laughs and it is hollow and biting. “I don’t know what you expected, but there isn’t a single piece of you in my heart. You’ve got to know that much.”

He says nothing, and she can tell that it’s none of his concern right now.

Some things don’t change.

※

After the escalation of the visitor room incident and after Johngalli A. has been expelled as a threat, she grants him quiet clemency, both for the sake of a working relationship and for her own sanity. As it always goes, however, the mere act of forgiving him does not banish the smoldering embers of resentment that still linger in the back of her mind and heart.

There isn’t enough room in her heart for a new emotion when he falls utterly unconscious before her eyes.

The panic that electrifies every dendrite in her body is foreign to her, unexpected, and she isn’t prepared. This wasn’t an emotion she ever thought she’d experience in relation to the man in front of her.

Fueled by adrenaline, she manages to drag him outside and wait for the Speedwagon Foundation to collect him. Each second stretches into an eternity, and her breaths are too shallow and quick to be substantial.

“Where’s that fucking UUV?” she shouts into the sky, voice breaking as the words scatter into the ocean wind.

She looks back down at Jotaro as blood seeps out of him and drifts onto the surface of the water, swirling around like an oil spill. Her chest feels like it’s on fire and breathing doesn’t come easily.

Finally, just as her knees begin to buckle and she’s about ready to concede defeat, she sees the shadow of something beneath the water near the horizon.

Jolyne has to take a chance, but she clings to his jacket just a little too long before letting go.

※

Trying to do this on her own is harder than she thought.

She’s been self-sufficient her entire life, but after every battle, there’s a recurring singular thought in the back of her mind:

Please come back.

Please come back.

Please come back.

※

After Pucci has been exterminated as a threat, Jolyne finds that she can’t go back to her normal life even after her absolution and exoneration. That bastard lawyer proved useful for once.

She can’t go back to school. Her mother’s gentle suggestion that she do so made her go waxen. She can’t work. She never knows exactly what to put on those applications; her record, while wiped clean of the manslaughter charge, was never expunged of the crimes from more jejune times.

She felt more hopeful in prison than she does now.

Her father made the sudden decision to move back to Florida. Curiously, Jolyne and her mother had been having talks (mostly in euphemisms) about potentially moving away from Florida to escape — her past, her mother’s past, the present, the future — yet, these talks ended a mere two days after her father’s arrival.

(It was, perhaps, mutual, Jolyne thinks as the rain beats against the window of the bus.)

※

What weighs on her mind more than school or work is the navigation of this newfound relationship with her father.

There is no solidified dynamic between them. Outside of the context of battle, he’s as awkward and distant as he ever was. He’s kept busy by professorship duties, and she’s similarly occupied with trying to collect the fragments of her life and haphazardly piece them back together.

Nevertheless, she shows up on the doorstep of Jotaro’s apartment complex every Friday night clad in a light jacket and short shorts, night bag in hand.

Jolyne doesn’t gain much from these visits, but it provides some much needed routine and a semblance of normalcy in her life otherwise laden with trauma. She watches whatever movie that catches her eye on TV and he pores over lab results and codes data — his life can be measured in p-values and correlation coefficients, things that she decidedly has no interest in.

Yet, she finds herself captivated by him, from the way he moves to the way his hand tenses up when he’s encountered something that doesn’t add up in the data. She curls up in the corner of the living room loveseat and studies him as intently as he studies his fieldwork.

Jotaro occasionally peers over his shoulder to look at her, attempting to be as surreptitious as possible and failing. She pretends not to notice, instead observing this phenomenon out of the corner of her eye.

On one such occasion, she experimentally flashes a flirtatious smirk and he looks away in the blink of an eye.

She can't stop herself from tallying it as a victory.

※

“Are you feeling okay?”

The question, issued in signature matter-of-fact fashion, prompts her to look up from her phone.

“What? Yeah. Why?”

His back remains turned to her. “Your face has been flushed the past few times you’ve come here and it’s cold season.”

She scoffs. “I’m fine. Since when do you notice that kinda stuff anyway?”

Jolyne watches as he hooks a finger into the collar of his turtleneck and clears his throat.

She swallows. Hard.

※

Jolyne knows that whatever she’s feeling towards him is childish at best. She tries to forgive herself for that; she never had a real model for how to have a relationship with a father who was absent for the vast majority of her life.

She tries to love him. Despite her best efforts, there’s only one way she knows how.

※

She tosses and turns on the futon set up in the living room and checks the time on her phone for the fifth time that night.

3:08 AM. The numbers mock her.

Jolyne throws off the blanket and starts pacing. As is customary for Florida, it was warm enough for pajama shorts and a tank top when she first went under the sheets, but now it’s far too cold. She grips her arms.

It’s one of the nights where the nightmares have her weaving in and out of slumber. She meanders around the apartment — much too big for a single man with no social life, she ponders — and finds herself facing the door to his bedroom.

She bites her lip. Should she?

A part of her simply wants to know how far she can go. (Which, in reality, is likely not far at all.)

If he gets upset with her — well, that’s his fault.

She delicately turns the knob and eases the door open, walking on the tips of her toes toward the bed. Jolyne moves closer to his side of the bed (why does he need a queen bed when he’s practically on the edge of one side?) and observes him. She’s only seen him in such a vulnerable state on one occasion other than this, and she’d prefer not to think of that.

He looks tranquil to such an extent that it’s a bit jarring for someone like him.

She wants so badly to reach out and touch him, and she almost does before (temporarily) quelling the flames of desire in her mind and moving to the other side of the bed. She gingerly peels back the muted cerulean sheets and slips in, hoping that this will be the end of it and that she didn’t rouse him from his slumber.

As soon as she shuts her eyes, she realizes it’s too late for that as he makes a vague noise indicating consciousness.

“Jolyne,” he murmurs, “what are you doing?”

What is she doing? She doesn’t quite know, herself.

“Making...making up for lost time, I guess,” she answers, matching his sotto voce volume. She retreats into the pillow. This all, quite suddenly, seems excessively juvenile.

Out of the corner of her eye, she can see Jotaro stealing an inscrutable glance at her before closing his eyes and making some kind of masculine grunt of approval. She rolls her eyes practically on instinct before closing them as well.

Several minutes pass before Jolyne acknowledges that she won’t rest until she sees for herself how far she can go.

“Dad.”

Silence.

“Dad...please.”

An exasperated sigh. He doesn’t open his eyes. “What is it?”

Jolyne moves closer to him, hovering a few inches above his broad chest. She feels like she’s physically being pulled in two different directions. She swallows a scream.

It’s already too late for her.

“You know, just because you let me stay in your house doesn’t mean anything. Why are you still avoiding me after all this time?” she asks. “I thought you moved back here to make things right.”

He’s still silent, but he stiffens.

“I don’t get it. I really don’t.” She bites her lip, disappointment and desperation brewing in her chest. She slides a hand up his bare torso and presses firmly against him. “You weren’t there when I was little and you aren’t here now.”

Her face feels warm and wet, as do the fingers splayed across her father’s chest, and it takes her a moment to realize that she’s been crying.

“I was pissed at you that whole time, you know. You could’ve died and I wouldn’t have cared.”

He tenses up further. She can practically hear the unsaid “is now really the time for this?”.

“But I was pissed at myself most of all...for not being the kind of daughter you could love. And I’m never going to be that person, am I?”

Jolyne weeps, tears staining her face and the sheets and tainting her father’s skin. She grieves as the moonlight beams through the window -- she mourns the image of her father she once had and its innocence. She mourns the death of the last chance at normalcy they had.

Jotaro’s hand slowly curls around her own.

“You’ve always been that person,” he mutters, so quiet that it hardly breaks through the veil of silence at all.

“Don’t say shit like that if you don’t mean it.”

She knows he does and her façade has become a formality.

“If you love me, show me,” she continues, and her muscles stiffen because those words have spelled the point of no return. A half-second passes, and one of two things could happen — she’s not sure which one she’s more afraid of.

Through the dreamy haze of fear and desire, she can feel herself press her lips against her father’s. It’s an act far removed from reality -- it’s a vision, a product of the night.

Her hands on his neck, his hands on her hips — a potent fusion of lust and panic courses through her veins.

He speaks first for once after breaking away from her.

“Jolyne,” he says breathlessly. There’s a tremendous pool of emotion beneath that single word, inaccessible and indecipherable to her.

His eyes are wide, but not with condemnation.

Jolyne can’t bring herself to say anything to defend herself. Thankfully, he speaks up before she can even try to do so.

“If this is what you want.”

She can read between the lines.

If this is the only way I can prove it to you...

His answer disappoints her, and she can’t pinpoint a single reason as to why — there are simply too many.

She tries not to think about it as she tastes the salt of his skin and gives him the only thing she has left for him.

※

After the sin is said and done — well, the world keeps spinning, much to her surprise.

It’s never quite at the same speed it used to be, though. The sky is off-blue; the person she sees when she looks in the mirror is a mere facsimile of who is actually there.

(Who is actually there now?)

※

Jolyne goes home to her mother’s house later that day.

She walks through the front door, and the realization that she can’t remember the walk home crashes down on her like a gelid wave. She shivers.

“Jojo?” her mother calls out from the living room.

She can’t look, and she can’t answer, for try as she might, her mouth has been sewn shut. Her mother seems to interpret her silence as characteristic brooding, however, and sighs.

“I guess your father was being his usual self?”

“Yeah. I guess so,” she replies. “I’m kinda tired. I’m gonna nap.”

“Okay, honey.” Another pause — this time, she can feel her mother’s concerned gaze burning into her. “If your father did anything that upset you, you can tell me, you know. I don’t want you to keep it inside.”

She’d rather say nothing than feed her mother a lie.

※

Her guilt does nothing to ease the overwhelming tide of dopamine that floods her brain when he touches her. It’s a trained response despite her objective horror at her new reality.

Every time Jolyne goes out, she looks at others — girls her age, families of all kinds, little kids on the playground — and the dissonant sensation of abject anomie is enough to make her heart gallop and prompt her to retreat back inside to her house or her father’s place.

She knew what she would be forfeiting for this. She knew the Faustian deal she signed up for.

A father’s love in exchange for everything else.

(As he palms her breast and exhales in ecstasy, she thinks — is this better than nothing at all?)

※

Weekends at Jotaro’s house begin to turn into weekdays and soon stretch into whole weeks. Her mother assumes that their relationship has improved and her worries are consequentially eased.

She isn’t incorrect, in a manner of speaking.

Her father readily acquiesces to her demands now, both outside and inside of the bedroom, and she can’t tell if it’s out of true paternal love or if he’s simply too tired to fight it.

(As she is.)

※

It’s the same Friday night routine as always, with the only difference being that Jotaro has joined her on the loveseat as he grades papers.

(She wonders how he can show up to work every day and not feel like a fraud of a human.)

His hand grips her thigh absentmindedly. A fresh resentful thought comes to the forefront of her frontal lobe: Aren’t good parents supposed to say no when their kids ask for things that are bad for them?

Jolyne scrutinizes him in her peripheral vision.

He’s been by her side this entire time. He is there, flesh and bone, rippling muscle and stony expression; it’s indisputable. Unmistakable.

And yet, after all these years, she still can’t find him.

[sly-merlin]

Killing Me - 4 | n.y

pairing : law student!reader + yuta

genre :    angst , mafia au/ arranged marriage au , smut

warnings : curse words, mention of murder, guns, knives, smut!

words : 5.4k

summary : “life’s never fair y/n. realise it as soon as you can . it is the only secret for living a regretless life.”

                                         or

                  “  curiousity got the cat hitched”

taglist :: (not tagging the old ones because they have read it already bt if u want , lemme know! )  @yiyi4657​​​ @sorrywonwoo​​​ @sillywinnergladiator​​​  @suhweo​​​ @exfolitae​​ @minejungwoo​​

K.M masterlist

k.m 3    k.m 5 

Previous morning in Taeyong’s office

“What was that for!” taeyong questioned jaehyun, clearly annoyed by his previous hostile mannerisms towards you. Jaehyun was on the receiving end of taeyong’s infuriation immediately after you departed from his office with doyoung.

“What!?” jaehyun tried to act oblivious at taeyong’s accusations.

“Why were you trying to scare her? Escort ring! For fucks sake Jae, I expected better from you.”

“But it wasn’t a dead loss. And even you went along in the same wagon, so don’t put everything on me alone.” jaehyun justified himself shrugging his shoulders lightly. “And admit it! She was giving you a hard time. That bitch was not buying anything!

Taeyong knew jaehyun was right. Your unsatisfied replies and never ending enquiries were exasperating him, but he would rather preserve his precious ego than admitting that to jaehyun.

He ruffled his well-made hair before replying to jaehyun, who was expecting some gratitude with a smug face.

“I-- just be careful and refrain from doing and saying anything that might put a dent in my plan. It’s a chance neo would never get again. So be patient and don’t go around opening your mouth about this to anyone.” jaehyun reluctantly nodded,not hearing what he wanted but his affirmation calmed taeyong’s nerves. He couldn’t trust jaehyun entirely but his options were limited.

All the pieces were in right place, for now. Nothing could go south right!

But jaehyun couldn’t completely understand the rationale behind Taeyong’s design.

and nor could the figure standing outside, completely hidden from the insiders.

The dread of the forthcoming finals substantiated the shortage of vacant seats in the kwanjeong library. You tried your best to arrive as expeditiously as possible for a person who partied, got abducted, arranged her own marriage, and again partied in grief, all in spam of about 34 hours. Finding no available seat, you decided to settle down on the floor. You gulped your cup of Americano in one go and began with the donut. As per a wise saying, Caffeine and sugar were the best combination as a breakfast for someone trying to get through their day with only 4 hours of sleep, the intellect being none other than your own self!

Yesterday was pretty long day. Though you were worn out from the adventures with wonwoo last night, your brain wasn’t exhausted enough to shut down properly when you tried to close your eyes.The flashes of the events had shrouded you with mixture of regrets and worries. What was the guarantee that you won’t end up dead tomorrow! What if taeyong was lying! But the fact regarding moon industries was absolutely legible. Maybe you should get a restraining order or something! But the existence of a person is necessary for that and yuta was a fucking corporate in the public eye and you were sure taeyong held some powerful position in the rich hierarchy as well, otherwise, covering the shits without revealing their true identities was not the job of some measly gang leader. There was more to taeyong than what someone could perceive just by looking. Will you be considered one of them now! After the little stunt that landed you straight into yuta’s life, you weren’t sure that he’d not strangle you in sleep. And What were you going to say to them? Chelin, yeom, guk, yeong.

and your thoughts spiralled from taeyong,yuta towards chelin and your friends and didn’t rest anytime before 4a.m. Waking up at 8 sharp , you took a shower and made your way towards the library.

And now you were here. 2 students passed your figure indicating that there were 2 vacant seats. Finally, after 15 minutes. They might have been the overnight students, you thought and walked inside before anyone else could claim the treasure. You had to find a new topic of thesis and do some research for international paper your professor was writing, and you being his designated so-called subordinate had to help him, involuntarily of course. But in this world, the student who could refuse their professor’s demands was yet to be born! Marking the place by placing your bag, you started the search for last month’ law journals and digests. One and a half hour passed, but you couldn’t find anything on international court of justice i.e. what your professor hadn’t already included. The urge to go out was profusely weighed down by your own sentiment of avoiding your friends. So you decided in favour of swallowing the bitter pill.

5 hours passed. The vibration of the timer in your phone prompted you to run off and get some food. It was already 2:30 and the lack of real food was making the tasks harder than they already were. Stepping outside into fresh air, instant regret of not bringing an umbrella washed over you. The sun was too bright unlike your mood and walking all the way to your favourite canteen would end up in you getting another headache. But you silently wished that every being from yesterday’s party was suffering from the same treatment of the over-the-top optimistic planet. why to suffer alone!

“Shortie” you lifted your head, spotting the combo of buy 1 get 1 free, heading your way.

“Where were you whole day? And if you aren’t going to pick calls then please do that poor thing a favour and sell it!” yugyeom barked while running his hand through his hair.

You shrugged jungkook’s elbow from your shoulder and replied “I was busy with prof. Joong’s work. And I have to be somewhere after 4 so I was a bit-

“Joong should adopt you already man!” Jungkook interrupted, nudging your sides with his fingers.

“ but I thought he wanted to be her sugar daddy!”  at that gyeom gave a serious and stern look to kook, pretending to ponder over his statement for a second and then suddenly they both starting laughing, hands hitting you everywhere to support their doubling figures.

“Get away from me, idiots!” you shouted, trying to get away from them. Once they were done with showing their exaggerated emotions, you all giggled together in unison. they were wearing their fundraiser t-shirts, you noticed.

“When is the fundraiser?”

“At 5. But you won’t be there to support us cause you are busy with your daddy!” kook exclaimed while bumping your shoulder with his arm.

“I didn’t say I’m going for Joong’s work and no, he’s not my sugar daddy, doofus. I’m busy with tutoring. I missed someone’s Saturday class so—

“Okay, chill tiger. You need to breathe. It’s a boring event anyway.” gyeom said in a comforting tone, interjecting your rapid fire speech.

“I’m gonna have lunch, are you two going?” you suggested.

“Yeah, it’s our break and yeong and minjun have eaten already, so that left you!” kook pouted when gyeom mentioned his boyfriend’s name.

“Let’s go! I want my sugar” your dramatic pout made yugyeom pet your hair lovingly and the three of you started walking on stone pathway on the way to the canteen.

“Where’s your umbrella?” jungkook asked you. He knew how much you hated walking under sun after the drinking escapades.

“I forgot but let’s not talk about it. it’s making me grumpy.”

“Okay! but why don’t you cover your head with that scarf instead.” he said pointing towards the silky material around your neck.

“Naahh, it ruins my fashion” they gave each other a puzzled look, shrugging their shoulders for they both couldn’t gather the reason of your weird behaviour.

At lunch, you talked to them about the fundraiser and gave your own contribution for the noble cause. The conversation with them progressed too easily and for about an hour you forgot about the turmoil in your life, which was still unknown to them.

After parting away, you went straight to your professor to show him your progress. He took note of the materials you found on recent cases and dismissed you without showing any gratitude. Not even a word of appreciation.

A ping!

Jaemin: noona, doyoung hyung is picking you up at 4 but he won’t enter the campus. Be out at 4!

You let out a frustrated groan at his text. You had only met him once, when he conferred upon you the honour of connecting your phone to his server but that was not the only favour you received! He also saved his contact number with various hearts that you obviously removed after reaching home. you could only pray to heavens that he won’t be there today as well!

You made your way to the library again, this time to work on your thesis. The time passed quickly than you thought. The alarm you placed earlier vibrated, indicating it was 4 already! You hastily made your bag and ran out of the library. It took 10 minutes to reach the gates of the campus. When you passed your dorms building, the idea of ditching doyoung and going to bed sounded tempting but as usual, nothing was going your way these days. You felt like the old catch 22 was in action.

You passed through the gates and looked around the road to find doyoung’s car but he was nowhere to be seen. While you were scanning the whole area, a low voice called your attention.

“What are you finding, I’m right here under your nose” a voice said through gritted teeth.

Yes, he was indeed sitting in the car right in front of you and the only one you missed apparently. You walked around the car to sit on the passenger seat, the tinted windows hiding you from the outside funfair.

“What took you so long? Its 4:15 already.”

“I don’t have a car like you so I walked myself here and it’s not like I did it purposely anyway.” You contended, the annoyance in your voice matching his own.

“Whatever, we are already late so turn around. Taeyong would be mad.”

“No I’m not turning around. First that cloth bag, then the handkerchief you tied on my eyes yesterday, its painful man. I’ll lose my eyesight this way. And I can navigate whole city from this place, you can’t hide your dungeon from me now” you reasoned. He didn’t tie your hands yesterday but your eyes were still covered.

“Then give me your scarf. I’ll cover your eyes with your own choice of article. It’s not painful or else you won’t be wearing it right! he said mockingly, pointing towards your neck.

“Umm, this scarf is act-

“Give me that already. I have some other things to handle as well.” assessing your options, you hesitantly removed the scarf, turning around to face the window immediately. Doyoung tied it across your eyes, checking the knot twice and tapped your shoulder. As you turned around, doyoung’s doe eyes widened, if that was even possible. Your collarbone and neck, which was visible through your v neck top, was covered with pretty purplish bruises. You fidgeted with your hands, flustered, feeling his eyes on you. But he remained quiet, focusing on the task at hand.

The whole drive was quiet and though your hands were not tied, you kept them on your backpack, hesitant to start any conversation. The car stopped finally, the mixed feelings coming back. The same process followed. He guided you inside but this time you passed only one door and the walk was quite shorter as well.

As doyoung was about to remove your scarf, a hand stopped him, or that was what you understood from the movements at that time.

“Silky scarf, blindfold and hickies hmm! Being kinky doyoungie. She’s your sister-in-law. Show some respect boy!” a voice remarked, the air around your face suddenly filled with chocolate and coffee. You hiccupped all of a sudden, earning a chuckle from the unknown presence.

You tried to reach for the blindfold, but your hands were caught mid-air, the said hands removing it. You blinked your eyes a few times to make out the figure’s face. He was standing, mostly bending to match your stature, face smiling to show all of his teeth.

Yuta.

You, surprised, took a step back but instead bumped into the one behind you.

“I’ll take over from here, doyoung.” but fortunately, he didn’t budge, fortunately. Your hold on backpack tightened, your eyes lowered to avoid his gaze. The only thing in your view were his baggy pants and white sports shoes.

But yuta could see only you and nothing else. Taeyong wasn’t the only one awaiting your arrival. Yuta was equally anticipating you.  His night was just as sleepless and anxious as you. He was afterall at the other end of the rope.

He raised your head, fingertips lightly grazing your chin. His hooded eyes roamed around your face like he was expecting you show some contempt , hatred,nervousness! He straightened up abruptly and started tying the silk around your neck. You flinched at his touch but he remained void of any reaction. His half denim jacket and white t-shirt hid you from the surroundings, his arms almost engulfing you. He repositioned himself to match you height again, arms crossing against his chest.

“Looks like someone had a fun night.” and in a second, his honey smile changed into a smirk, letting go of any trace of earlier softer expressions. And the look on his face was enough to scare the shit out of anyone.

“Stop yuta” a taller man you recognised from yesterday as Johnny, pushed yuta aside from your view. It was then you saw that everyone was there. Including the one you were yet to encounter.

Your eyes wandered from one side to other of the room. Johnny let you inspect.

“Doyoung, what was the need to cover her eyes?” Johnny whispered to doyoung, breaking your trance.

“Why is everyone nagging me so much” he whined in a screeching voice.

“Karma bitch” Johnny pointed his forefinger towards him before giving his attention to you.

“Hey, how are you y/n.” he asked, his cheerful voice totally in contrast with the weather of the room.

“I’m- ummm.” you cleared your throat before continuing. “I’m fine Johnny. As fine I can be.” you mumbled the last part but he surely heard you.

“You remembered my name!” he clapped, his eyes turning into crescents. You gave him a tight lipped smile in return, waiting for some instructions. As if on cue, taeyong’s loud voice graced your ears.

“Come y/n. make yourself comfortable” he indicated towards the couches that were almost already occupied. Johnny gestured you to proceed, walking with you. You passed yuta who was still smirking and sat on the single seat available next to taeyong. You placed your backpack on the large table in the middle of the room. It looked like a normal living room for guests, just with too many couches to accommodate the gang. You felt like an uninvited because apparently everybody was watching you like a hawk. Their stares changed sight only when yuta came to take a seat on one of the couch, exactly opposite to yours. You met his eyes briefly before turning your face towards your bag again.

Who knew the rusty zips of your bag were so interesting!

“So y/n I thought you should meet everyone. You are going to be part of this family soon. Better get acquainted with all.” taeyong addressed you while he sat on his couch majestically like a king. You heard a dry laugh and if you had to guess it had to be from jaehyun or yuta.

You didn’t understand why he wanted that. You were just a risk till yesterday and now means to discipline yuta.

And why all the formalities if you were gonna leave anyway.

“I’m going to leave anyway, taeyong. So I don’t see a need to do it!”

You were too consumed to notice how your sentence turned all the heads around you. Some started giving side eyes to each other. There was something they were all missing.

“I said you could leave. But not without my permission. So, you’d be stuck for now, maybe till months or years.”

You gulped at his words. Taeyong turned your only hope into a distant dream. Maybe you were too foolish to gauge the situation.

“You want something to eat or drink before we continue” he asked in a sincere voice. Shaking your head, you rubbed your eyes with the palms of your hands to stop them from moistening. There was nothing more embarrassing than to cry in front of a bunch of strangers who didn’t give a shit about you.

“No, please continue.” you emphasised again to not draw any more attention to yourself than already was. And you internally thanked to taeyong who continued as if you weren’t just gonna cry!

“You will move in with yuta on Saturday,” it was Monday. “The wedding ceremony would be held in the morning. So you have few days to prepare, everything from your dress to every other thing you need shall be arranged. Just name it and you’ll have it!”

Wedding ceremony! That was not on the plate!

“I don’t want a cerem-

“Leave the bullshit ta-

You and yuta both cut off each other simultaneously. You glanced at his side, finding him already piercing his gaze into yours.

“There’s no need for it. The paper signing is enough. It’s not like we are in-

You knew taeyong understood what you were trying to say, so you didn’t continue. But you were already having a feeling of superiority over yuta for being the first to offer your opinion. It felt like a payback for flustering you earlier. You refrained from facing him again, your body turned towards taeyong only, but you felt satisfied with the thought of him being riled up.

“Oh, but I want a ceremony taeyong and mark is going to be the best man. He’s so excited. You can’t do that to him!” yuta emphasised through the variation in his voice. You knew he changed his argument purposely , but you maintained your cool, opting to ignore him . bear and forbear.

Taeyong raised his eyebrow at you but you shook your head again.

“I don’t think it’d be a good idea. It’s not a normal one anyway so why pretend!” you held your ground.

“You aren’t getting married to a mannequin.” yuta retracted. “I’m getting married as well and don’t anyone dare say that I made a mistake and blah blah. At last I’ll be hitching so I want a ceremony and Japanese at that!”

Oh yeah, he was Japanese. You has missed that as well.

All the other men in the room, 9 to be exact, were nodding at everything that was being said. They were unable to decide whose argument was worth taking side for. Finally Johnny spoke-

“I think y/n is right” looking at nowhere particular, he continued. “What’s with pomp and show when it’s nothing more than an agreement”

“But if yuta hyung wants it, then why not. They are going to live together, he should have his say as well.” it was mark who took yuta’s side. He didn’t know why but watching yuta losing ground urged him to support his brother.

You looked briefly at the boy who just argued with Johnny.

“He’s mark y/n.” taeyong said the answer you were looking for. “And he’s Jungwoo, jeno, doyoung, you have already met him, then jaehyun, johnny, renjunie, hendery. Others are busy so you’ll meet them some other day probably.”

A few waved towards you, including mark, who shyly withdrew his hand quickly. They all probably hated you as there was no other reaction towards a person who almost put your life in danger!

“Can we get to a middle ground now? I’m already getting tired of this” jaehyun grumbled, leaning into the couch.

“Ok so, he wants a celebration of a lie! What about me then. You are all here but I have no one. I’m alone and probably will be. Because taeyong, you haven’t told me how am I going to reveal this to my friends? I may not have a family, but still there are people close to me. they are my best friends, roommate, and many others who need to know! How am I going to explain them that their friend who didn’t even have a boyfriend, is getting married suddenly? I don’t even have parents to cover it with an arranged marriage. How to convince them? give me a way and I’ll agree” you pointed out the very important detail that they were missing. But they needed to know that there was other side of the paper as well and your reasons were not just a cry in the wilderness.

Nobody made a sound. Everything went quite like a dark night until-

“I hope this is not the calm before a storm!” you looked over to see the person who broke the silence. It was another young man coming with a food trolley, probably from the kitchen.

“I thought we have a guest so I prepared some coffee and donuts. I hope you like sweets y/n” the man was smiling ear to ear, seeming too happy with your visit.

“I-

“I’m kun.” he introduced himself and you shook his hand. He seemed too polite for a criminal. “Have this and tell me how it is” he forcibly handed you a dessert plate with a chocolate glanced donut. You took it out of politeness but felt a bit weird to be the only one eating it. You watched him with quizzical eyes as he took one for himself and sat on the arm of your couch. Everyone was now staring at your movements.

“Eat it, eat it. These are for you and me only.” he cajoled.

You decided to take a bite and then place it back just to stop the awkwardness.

As you bit it from one side, your brain short circuited. “Holy shit, bro. what is this sorcery.” your genuine and innocent reaction made Kun laugh loudly, some of the others joined in as well.

“Thank god, you like it! I’m so glad you aren’t one of weight conscious ones, otherwise it’d have been weird.” he starting munching on his own piece.

“I’m a sugar bear. I can’t live without sugar. I just had a donut in the morning but it was bleh comparing to this. You are a master chef bro.” and for a minute you forgot the previous tense environment. Everyone was glad that Kun came to save the situation and except to you, it was known that obviously he heard everything from the kitchen.

“You ate one in the morning! Then it’s the last one you’re getting. Everyone help yourself. She’s not having anymore!” as if they were waiting, everyone except mark and yuta picked them up.

“Mark” Kun motioned towards the tray and he grabbed one as well.

“What if I was allergic to chocolate, kun” you asked him while finishing your treat.

“Oh please! Even ten eats it.” he laughed to himself at his reference, which went over your head.

“Now coming to the point.” Everyone looked at taeyong who was already done with eating. “Y/n doesn’t want anything special so it’ll happen like that. No!yuta, lemma speak. And you y/n, it’s upon you to make your friends believe. Make up a story or do whatever you want. You don’t want to tell them about the wedding. Fine with me but do let them know at least that you have a boyfriend that you are moving in with! It’s on you both to make this arrangement believable.

“okay , sho now I shuggenly hab a voyfiend” you started speaking without even finishing the bite in your mouth. you continued once you chewed it.

“wont they be suspicious. They know exactly what I do and what I don’t. It’s almost impossible to put a façade in front of them.”

“Oh please, don’t tell me they even know from where you got those hickies” jaehyun’s curt statement was a hit below the belt. Kun was about to scold him when you elaborated his statement further to prove that he was doing nothing but burning his own fingers.

“Yes, actually they happen to know. When, where and from whom I got these. Anything else you want to ask?.” he rolled his eyes on your reply, busing himself with the delicacy instead.

“They don’t know yuta. So if you want you can introduce him to your people. He won’t be posing any problem, take my word for it.”

“I’ll go with you if you also accompany me,that I guess would be a problem for you. You don’t want to be seen with a criminal, or do you!” yuta jabbered. He was trying to push your buttons to measure your limit. But little did he know that you were far from being that easy.

“I just said I don’t want a wedding. I’ll agree to anything that is reasonable and is not degrading to me.”

“Ok then, nobody would force you to do what you don’t want.” taeyong decided to took matter in his own hands now. “And we’ll organise a small, very intimate gathering at taeil’s office to celebrate as yuta wants. And you’ll be introduced as Mrs. Nakamoto to our corporate world.” taeyong finished gauging both of your reactions. The surname was foreign and cringing to you. But it was going to be yours, so there was nothing you could do, for now.

“What do you mean ‘our’ corporate world.” you got puzzled at his choice of words.

“You’ll find out soon and its nothing scary, don’t worry.” Kun responded on behalf of taeyong this time, handing you your cup of coffee. “Tell me if it’s cold, I’ll-

“No it’s totally fine.” you assured him, without even taking a sip. He was being nice enough already.

“If my opinion has no value, then what am I even doing here!” yuta shouted, getting up from the seat.

“yut-

Before Kun could say anything, he stormed off. Mark tried to follow but taeyong stopped him from doing that.

“Don’t mind him. He’s a hot head.” Johnny laughed in between his bites.

You only nodded, sipping your coffee. You were glad he was gone. Sugar has always done wonders for you and it was having same effects now as well. You were able to think more rationally now.

“One more thing” you furrowed your brows at taeyong. What was left now!  “Do you want any specifications in the house? It’s my responsibility. A wedding gift you can say. If you need anything like extra closet, a more spacious kitchen-

“Kitchen?” you let out a brief chuckle at that. Everyone’s eyes were on you now. “It’ll be totally fine if I don’t even get a kitchen. I can’t cook anything besides ramyeon and salads. So I won’t even need that.”

“You are a student. Don’t you know anything basic.” it was Jungwoo who spoke in the voice sweeter than even Kun’s.

“No. I grew up in an orphanage and they provided us everything. I left when I started law. So all in all, I never had anyone to teach me. That’s why if you want to know best food trucks and restaurants in the city, I’m your best option.but, if that yuta knows how to cook, ask him about the kitchen.” you spoke non chalantly .But you didn’t realise how uncomfortable the air had become. a heavy silence took over the light atmosphere.

“I’m sorry noona” Jungwoo apologised sheepishly.

“It’s fine. After all there are some things that your hacker can’t find out. only I can tell you those.” saying that, you faced taeyong again. “But if you insist, I can always use a study room.” you tried to enlighten the mood again.

“Ok. I’ll find something suitable for you both.” you hummed, not knowing what to say anymore.

“Can I go back now?”

“Yes, doyoung will drop you.”

“No, I’ll go with her.” Johnny said, grabbing your attention. He didn’t look sulky like doyoung so, it’d be fine, you guess.

They said you goodbyes. Mark seemed hesitant to even look at you, but you couldn’t care less. He was just a stranger after all.

Yuta couldn’t realise why everyone was trying to be so nice to you. Till yesterday, he was allowed to put a gun on her head but now every being was against him. He didn’t know why he was so furious at taeyong, to forcing him to marry you or from dragging mark into this mess. Taeyong knew how to play dirty, but yuta never thought he’d use his own brother. There was no option for him as well, as taeyong has said. He showed interest in a fucking celebration to contradict you, but you were not backing down and that felt like a punch to his gut.

He drove towards his stress reliever. The infamous Japanese club. Only place where he could drown his sorrows.

The club was packed despite it being Monday. That was one thing he liked about it, you’ll never be disappointed in this place.

“ゆた!” The hostess chimed seeing yuta. “久しぶり” [ long time, no see!]

He signed her to give him 2 shots. She did as told but her gaze was following yuta’s, which rested on her cleavage. He came here only for 2 things after all.

He gulped the drink in a second without blinking an eye.

“バックルーム” [ back room]

She wasn’t someone to be told twice. She handed her hand towel to her co-worker and followed the path. Who was she to reject him after all?

As she opened the door, yuta pressed her against the door, shutting it with a thud, His tongue directly fighting with hers. Sinful sounds escaped her throat as yuta’s hand started working on the skimpy fabric she wore to cover herself. She moaned loudly as yuta pinched her nipples hard, his groans matching her loud ones. His eagerness always started a fire in her body, with intensity too much to handle. Her hands undid his pants, dropping them on the floor. They have done it so many times that the whole process imprinted in their minds by now.

without breaking the kiss,she changed their positions making yuta’s back hitting  the door . With a loud smooch, his lips parted hers, to let her function pn her own.

She got to her knees while he got rid of his shoes to remove the boxers. She gave a few pumps before giving kitten licks to the tip while her gaze was fixed on his face.

“Hisoka, I’m in a hurry” he warned her. Smirking, she took him in her mouth, going up and down as head bobbed with the motion. Yuta fisted her hair, roughly stroking himself inside of her. She whimpered on the action and hit his balls with her other hand, earning a chuckle from him. Yuta knew how much she hated when he took charge. Yuta’s head hit the door as she sped up, the grip on her hair tightening and with a few deep throats, he was done. Yuta looked at her fucked up eyes, chin dripping with his seed. He picked her up with her elbow, his mouth latching towards her breast as soon as her back hit the same spot again. she moaned in pleasure as her shorts were removed hastily by him. Yuta merely smirked at her lack of panties.

“You knew I was coming hmm!” he growled sensually in her ear. Her body almost crumbled on the floor at his voice. ��Let’s do it then!” he exclaimed, slipping himself into her. Her one leg that was wrapped around his waist provided him a perfect angle to stroke while his hand perfectly trapped her against the door. his mindless thrusts made her breasts to bounce with the same pace. “Faster”  her  moans were muffled from the outside world due to the high bass music that was playing in the club , providing them the coverage from any 

“もっと”[ more!] Yuta asked her while giving a final hit to her insides, her body losing all the strength as she released her love juices. She slumped towards his chest as yuta let himself undone. As they rode their highs, yuta kissed her neck from behind, leaving her body in shivers for the next few minutes.

He drove back silently again. The relieve he felt was all dissipated now. Instead his mind was already wandering towards you. Your headstrong attitude was troubling him more than he anticipated! his plans were all down and out. He hated you , from the moment he laid his eyes on you. You acted like you were invincible but he knew it was just a mask to protect yourself.

He had noticed how you had rubbed your eyes to hide your disappointment for you didn’t want to appear weak. All he had to do now was to find a vulnerable part of you, to hit you where it’d hurt the most. It’d be last time he lost to you. from now on, you won’t be able to keep up with him.

Afterall, beginning is always easy, it is continuing that’s hard!