#without /understanding/ them

[defensivelee]

why does every queer turn into a redpilled anti-woke far-right comedian fan the moment you tell them they're intersexist like 'stop inventing new terms 🤡🤡 why is everything a slur now 🤡🤡🤡 that one friend that's too woke 🤡🤡' like it's actually surreal how often it happens. i desperately want to know what makes them think that shits okay.

[cloudfishcg]

referring to the cleanup arc

[xitsensunmoon]

You'd think after getting your dear daycare attendant out of the Pizzaplex you would live happily ever after, hm?

look who changed their mind to post the whole thing together oops

[littlefankingdom]

I cannot explain the anger I feel anytime I read a panel where a character we are supposed to side with (except Bruce, because he's a self-loathing champion) says that Bruce should never be a father.

Batman, Bruce Wayne, was created in 1939, and he didn't even last two years before his creator gave him a child. In his long existence, Batman has only existed for LESS THAN TWO YEARS before he was made a father. Dick wasn't adopted because of the laws at the time against bachelor adopting, but Bruce was clear in the comics that this was his son. Old comics are a bit silly at time, and abuse was acceptable parenting in this time period (spanking and slapping, which Dick has been the subject of both), but it's clear that Bruce is meant to be a loving father. Dick is his pride and joy. If anything happens to him, Bruce is threatening everyone. He will kill everyone in the room than himself if his boy dies. He has huge paintings and pictures of the boy in and out of costume around his house because he loves him so much. When Dick is mad and threatens to leave, Bruce is like "I would prefer to lose both my arms and legs than lose you".

And it continued after that. When Dick leaves for college, Bruce is acting like it's a funeral. He's a dad realizing his baby is all grown up now and leaving home, and it's breaking his heart. He cried when child protective service took Dick from him, and when they took Jason. Both time, which are separated by decades, he was willing to throw away everything he had just to get his son back. Dick was the center of his universe, and with Jason, it was extended to his kids in general.

Batman, Bruce Wayne, being a dad is as important to his character as the murder of his parents. It's him learning to move on from this traumatic event, building a new family after losing his, giving children what he didn't have. It's linked to his parent's murder. If you are going to take that away, you can take away their murder too while you're at it.

This man would not survive without being a father, that's how he was written. It's a core characteristic of his character. Bob Kane is rolling in his grave from the audacity of those writers. "Batman shouldn't be a father" in your dreams, which are my nightmares.

[loriache]

"I've been waiting for ages for somebody to unmask them."

This moment tends to elicit negative reactions in a first read through, and I've got some opinions about why where Kabru is coming from here actually makes a lot of logical sense. So I thought I'd elaborate on that.

I think people hear this and go, "He thinks they must be hiding something because they gave money to someone? What a cynic." Or "he dislikes them because they did charity?? What's wrong with this guy!". And obviously, a lot, a lot is wrong with him. But I think this makes more sense than it seems at first glance! What people evaluating this judgement miss is why Kabru is paying attention to Laios and co to begin with.

Kabru knows of the Touden siblings because (he's a little bit of a stalker-) he is keeping an eye on all the relevant parties in events developing on the island, in order to be able to guide them to his preferred outcome. This includes adventurers because they are the ones actually exploring the dungeon! He's well aware that something as minor as internal tensions between party members could be key to the historical events that are developing. (He would love the assassination of Archduke Franz Ferdinand.)

His desired outcome is that whatever the rewards are of breaking the dungeon's curse, whether that's kingship or the ancient elven secrets of dungeons, are claimed by:

A) a short lived person

B) Someone who will be a good, effective leader and/or use those secrets and the power they carry wisely, with foresight, and to establish a political bloc for short lived people.

The person he can best trust to do this is, of course, himself. But due to his PTSD regarding dungeons and monsters, he's not able to develop the necessary skills to conquer the dungeon. Once he realises this, he starts looking for someone else who he can support to that end.

But most of the adventurers don't have any intentions of conquering the dungeon, don't have the skills, or are unsuitable in other ways. In fact, it seems like some potentially suitable people are the Toudens. There are a lot of good rumours about them going around - they actually seem to have a very positive reputation! That's what Kabru means when he says "unmask".

So when Kabru is observing something like them giving money to an old comrade from their gold-peeling days, he doesn't consider it a problem because "they're giving money to this person who doesn't actually need it" or because they must have some dark secret if they act superficially nice. I think he actually understands this situation and what it implies about Laios (in particular) perfectly well.

Laios and Falin gave money to an old comrade who got injured and couldn't work. That person then healed up but kept taking their money. Then he used the money to start smuggling illicit goods to the island.

The key is that for Kabru, the problem here is the same as with the corpse retrievers - people using the dungeon's resources to fuel dangerous, selfish, or violent pursuits cause problems for the island, attract more criminals and people with motives other than breaking the curse, and increase the chances of the whole situation ending in tragedy.

Kabru is willing to work with the Shadow Lord of the island if it gets him to his goal - he isn't scrupulous - but the criminal element of the island increasing is something he sees as a major issue.

Also, when you're evaluating someone as a candidate for power, riches, secrets, potentially kingship - then being curious about how the money you give to people is going to be used is kind of a relevant trait!

Interpersonally, Kabru's actually very easygoing - I mean, Mickbell isn't exactly an upstanding guy, is he! But Kabru likes him and they get along well. These traits wouldn't be a problem at all in a friend, or a comrade, or someone Kabru was confident he could use. But he can't get a handle on Laios, and Laios is someone who has the potential to be a major player!

On Laios' end, this is the same as with the marriage seeker who joined their party. She kept asking for things and he gave them to her, because he tries to be nice to others. He even gives her money! It's the exact same thing.

That's fine, but it became a problem because he basically wasn't interested in her motives, didn't notice she was trying to manipulate him, and it also didn't occur to him that the other party members would notice or be affected. We can assume the situation with the gold peeler is the same. When Kabru says that "It's not that they're bad people, they just aren't interested in humans," he isn't wrong.

The extent to which this is true of Laios is linked to his autism imo, (because it isn't just disinterest - he genuinely isn't able to notice nonverbal cues that people are lying to him or have ulterior motives) but to a greater or lesser extent I think it's a very common trait. Most people aren't actually that interested in other people who aren't close to them. Kabru is the weird one here. It isn't an issue except as a leader - which is why we see an immediate comparison to the Island's Lord, because that's how Kabru is evaluating them.

And disinterest in/lack of ability with people to the extent Laios exhibits it, it does, actually, make him a worse leader... it's just that as we see in the story, people can help him out. The rest of the party tell him the marriage seeker is taking advantage of him so he tells her he can't give her special treatment anymore. They're pissed and it's a crisis point - he couldn't have recovered their trust without Marcille and Falin - but that's exactly the point. With Marcille and Falin, he was able to recover their trust.

And he has other good traits that make up for it, such as his intelligence, strategic knowledge, open-mindedness and sense of fairplay.

Kabru doesn't disqualify Laios as a candidate based on what he sees about him from afar, though - he still tries very hard to get close to him, obviously hoping that if he manages he can steer Laios to defeat the dungeon and make up for his lack of people-skills in the aftermath. (Which... he does eventually achieve that goal!) He completely fails until the events of the story, so... definitely I think "They just aren't interested in humans" could also partially be a stung reaction to Laios' complete disinterest in him.

Anyway, that's my read on what exactly Kabru's "issue" with Laios is. Obviously, once he does find out what Laios' true nature is like - about his love for monsters - he develops an entirely new set of fears about Laios' priorities. But since Laios kept that a secret until the start of the story, he has no idea of that yet.

Given all that, I think it's interesting that he says that he doesn't think that the Toudens are suitable to defeat the dungeon, and that he's hoping they'll turn out to be the thieves. As some of his few potential candidates, people who he thinks may play a big role in the island's future, you'd think he'd hope they would be good people!

I suppose it's better, in his eyes, because it means that he's involved in something "interesting". They haven't just had their stuff stolen by regular criminals (boring, puts them further away from his goal) - they've been caught up in the beginning stages of "a historic event". The desperate and dwindling group forgetting morals in their quest to retrieve their lost comrade probably appeals to his sense of melodrama. Because he also just... loves drama.

Despite it being "uglier than anything he was expecting", he still pursues Laios as the person he wants to conquer the dungeon pretty much as soon as it becomes clear that he won't be able to do it himself and they are out of time. That's because... well, to be fair, there aren't any other options. And he fits standard A: he's short-lived!

and Kabru still hopes he can fit standard B, too, and be persuaded to use the power he wins for good. No matter how many nightmares he has about Laios, or whether he thinks about killing him. He doubts him, but ultimately he puts his faith in him and seems happy after the manga's ending that he made the right decision.

[chapollynh]

I finished DS9 and here's my first offering to the fandom.

The show is just SO GOOD!! I wanna talk about it so bad, so I will spam the tags quite a bit... My bad. Also, the people who said Bashir would get better - you were right, he became a lot more fun! Plus he's got a teddy bear, that's peak character right there.

[reineydraws]

i dont have a caption for you lol i'll let shanks's heart eyes speak for themselves 🫶

(source)

[zuzu-romeave]

“this episode could’ve been an email” WHY DO YOU HATE STORYTELLING SO MUCH!!! WHY DO YOU HATE WORLD BUILDING AND GETTING ANSWERS AND EXPLORING CHARACTERS!!!!

[wolfsong-the-bloody-beast]

From:

To:

And finally to:

I love them, okay.

[s0fter-sin]

ghost who works with abused dogs because he can relate to their fear and anger and soap who's terrified of dogs but needs a service animal after he gets shot

ghost who's covered in just as many bite scars and scratches as he is scars from his childhood and the military, but he never holds it against a single dog

he knows what it's like to feel trapped and think you only have one way out

he sits through the barking and the lunges, steadily gets closer as he gently talks with each dog, apologises when he moves too quick and gets bitten because it's always his fault, never the dog's. no one bites for no reason

the pride he feels when he gets to share their blanket for the first time is only matched by the day of their adoption

it’s soap's friend’s idea to bring him to check out a dog to foster while his service dog goes through training. he knows he's uncomfortable around dogs - he never made a production out of it but you can only duck around someone so they’re in between you and a dog so many times before they pick something up - but he just thinks he's not used to them and being around one will be enough to calm him down

soap knows he needs a service animal; both for medical reasons and help with every day tasks but also for emotional regulation. he pings from depression to apathy to white hot rage so quick it exhausts him; he's so tired of blowing up at people just because he can't keep his head on straight

he needs a service dog

but just hearing the barking from outside has him so on edge, he's almost sick from it

a volunteer shows them all the dogs available to foster. his friend gushes over every single one; cooing about how cute and sweet they look, just darling things, encouraging them to jump up on their barrier and play tug with their toys, and “come on soap, say hello”

soap keeps his distance, smiling thinly as the volunteer introduces each dog

but ghost happens to be in one of the kennels working with his latest trouble case

and he can plainly see how terrified soap is, no matter how well he thinks he’s hiding it

he flinches at every bark, his hands fisted at his sides, but his friend just doesn't notice; too occupied with the lab mix he’s playing with. ghost can see just how tight he's winding up, the tension creeping up his spine, his “smile” twitching uncontrollably, and it doesn't surprise him in the slightest when he finally snaps at his friend to “just fuck off, alright!” after he keeps pushing him to get closer to the dogs

the abrupt silence is tight and judgmental; the friend giving him a wild look. soap gives a short apology, still angry even though if anyone just took the time to look, it’d be clear he doesn't want to be, and storms out while his friend apologises to the volunteer; dripping with shame and embarrassment that sets ghost's teeth on edge

he could've stopped a dozen times before soap blew up, should've seen the warning signs that he was getting overwhelmed and afraid long before he got to that point

he spreads out a few treats for his dog, both a reward for his patience and an apology for prematurely ending their time together, slowly getting to his feet. he heads outside to find soap in the alley beside the shelter, swearing at himself under his breath and looking seconds away from punching the brick

and when soap snaps, “enjoying the show?”, squaring up with his teeth bared, ghost just leans back against the wall; open and non-threatening and waits for soap to come to him

just ghost who knows what it's like to be angry and afraid and has the patience to help soap feel more in control of himself, never flinching from his bark or his involuntary bite, as well as help him through his fear in time for his service dog

[illuminchim]

“Between you and me, there is no need for 'thank you' and 'sorry'."

[tvuniverse]

the eddie kissing buck first propaganda needs to be stopped at all cost ✋I know i know, i'm probably going to be taken out back and shot several times BUT hear me out:

buck needs to get off that squeaky spinning wheel and for that he needs to be the one initiating Something -either love confession or kiss or both i'm not picky- because as my good friend Bobby (#rip) said he's always been the one going with the flow and not knowing how he even got into a relationship in the first place so him breaking that pattern is essential to his own personal growth. he hasn't initiated a first kiss on screen a single time. he's always been either caught by surprise (taylor and tommy), or been asked out on a date without necessarily expecting it (ali and natalia), and even his first date with abby mostly happened because of external pressure (hen and athena cornering them), and she ended up being the one to kiss him first later on.

and for eddie it's the opposite, he's always been the one initating pretty much everything with his love interests: calling shannon in the first place and then kissing her first, asking ana and marisol out on a date. He's always had to make that choice for himself, and buck pretty much jumped any time someone showed interest in him and only started considering his own feelings when things started to get rocky in his relationships. So them actually switching that because buck is that sure of his feelings for the first time, oh that would be so juicy, so good, so delicious.

anyway this is not me starting discourse ❌ because i hate that but just me officially campaigning (at the very last minute) for buck initiating the love confession and/or their first kiss. thank you for your consideration 🙏

[tempestaurora]

actually very obsessed with frank langdon as a father. as a man wearing a DAD bracelet his child made for him. as a parent who wants to hear his son's voice after a little girl dies in a trauma room he never even stepped in. i just know he loves them so much. he's the only one in the entire department who ever just brings up his family and his kids casually. he got them an ill-advised dog and he wanted to make them dinner and he wears that bracelet every day and holds it when he gets distressed. i just care about langdon as a father so much

[deikshen]

More DILF Shen Yuan because I woke up from that mood

Shen Yuan has an ex-wife with whom he gets along well, an older daughter who is already of legal age as geeky as he is, two younger thirteen years old twin sons, and his daughter under ten years old. He is closer to fifty than forty, and apparently a traditional life with a wife and children was what was necessary for him to accept how terribly homosexual he is.

But that's okay, he supposes. Accepting his sexuality, learning to communicate better... Necessary things. His ex-wife is now his friend, his children are well raised with lots of love and patience. Shen Yuan does not consider his divorce a failure, as his brothers accuse him, just another experience. He was not happy in his marriage. Why should he remain in a place where he was not happy?

Then one day, Luo Binghe knocks on his door.

Shen Yuan looks at the haughty man dressed in xianxia robes, a sword on his back, says "fuck not today" and closes the door in his face. Luo Binghe enters anyway. Look, Shen Yuan may enjoy the habit of reading and trashing web novels... That doesn't mean he accepts web novel protagonists ending up at his doorstep! Really!!

Luo Binghe looks shocked to see him, Shizun this, Shizun that. He looks at him as if Shen Yuan in his haughty fifties with gray hair and a tired face had two heads or four arms.

Well, it's Luo Binghe. Shen Yuan knows that he has no chance to fight him. It's not even opposed to the idea of fantasy - age drains one's imagination. If Luo Binghe is there, great, damn, he really is there.

Shen Yuan takes a deep breath, scolds him for breaking his door, tells him that he's really not in the mood for games or riddles. He has to finish correcting some important files which must be delivered no later than tonight. Luo Binghe is invited to stay as long as he keeps that sword away from his children. This week they will be with their mother, but not the following week, and that is his only condition. He's not going to let the kids near that sword.

... Luo Binghe surprisingly accepts it.

In reality, Shen Yuan is concentrating on his work so as not to think that there is a xianxia protagonist inspecting every aspect of his house. By the time he submits the corrections he owes, it's not even dusk yet and Luo Binghe is sitting on the sofa in the living room, watching a historical drama that Shen Yuan sometimes watches with a look of surprise. Shen Yuan explains the plot to him a bit and when it seems that Luo Binghe is more lost than found, he actually asks him what he wants. How did he get there? Why to his house? What does he want?

Luo Binghe looks annoyed that he has to explain - as if Shen Yuan should know beforehand or just agree to Luo Binghe's demands without asking! He explains about opening portals with Xin Mo, a strange world where there was another him, a kind Shizun married to another Luo Binghe. Something about a soul exchange, tracing the soul back to... him. Luo Binghe wants that kind Shizun for himself. He wants what is rightfully his. Why would a Luo Binghe have someone like that in his life, and he wouldn't?

Shen Yuan tries to be open-minded enough. Well, it's not like there's any other explanation. Luo Binghe shows him his claws, his zuiyin, and it's clear that he really is who he says he is. Shen Yuan assumes that a version of him (different? Who came out of the closet before marrying a woman?) transmigrated and took his favorite character as a husband, even if it is from the skin of the scum villain. Well, congratulations to him. Shen Yuan wishes them all the best.

But now there is a very real, very demonic, very traumatized Luo Binghe in his living room, watching a transmigration drama, trying to understand everything. Shen Yuan feels sad for him. He definitely needs kindness, good treatment, better care. These are not things he gets in the harem! Always having to be the provider, the protector, the one who gives his all. Shen Yuan had always been annoyed by that part of the story.

Well, now he can change that, can't he?

He tells him that he is not willing to go with him. He has a very good job as an editor, his children have an arrangement to spend one week at his house and one week at their mother's house, he has a good relationship with his ex-wife. Going to another universe would complicate his life as long as he doesn't do it during his vacation season.

However, Luo Binghe is welcome to stay. Shen Yuan will be kind to him, but if Luo Binghe wants to, he must communicate about it. And he cannot talk about other worlds, demons, harem or emperors when his children are at home. Luo Binghe doesn't quite agree, but he agrees. Shen Yuan promises him that he will take a vacation and go to that world of his to meet him, but it won't be right away. Luo Binghe is a little appeased by that.

And so, a few days later, Shen Yuan picks up his children from his ex's house and tells them: "I've brought a friend to live with us for a while."

He explains to them that he comes from far away, that he doesn't know much about the city or technology, that he speaks strangely and that it can be overwhelming. But he is a good friend, he cooks exquisitely, and he will enjoy spending time with them.

(Luo Binghe would not agree to that last point.)

They are somewhat wary, a wariness that goes away when they enter a house that smells of delicious, unburned home-cooked food. After dinner, they are more willing to accept Luo Binghe into their home and their life. And Luo Binghe does his part well: he behaves pleasantly, speaks casually, does not terrify or intimidate the children, he is a functional adult... As soon as the kids go to their rooms he looks up at Shen Yuan with big puppy eyes waiting for pats on the head for being good.

Sweet Jesus. Shen Yuan is too out of the closet for this. How will he survive this Luo Binghe who just wants to be treated kindly without spoiling him and showering him with all the love he deserves?

[rileylastname]

maybe it’s because it’s “too obvious” but im surprised how few readings I’ve seen of the Substance (2024) that discuss the themes of addiction and substance (ha) use & abuse.

in moderation you can use the substance to become a better, more fun, easier, happier version of yourself. then you realize you no longer want to be who you are when you’re not on the substance. then taking the same dose that used to be enough before isn’t enough anymore, so you want to take more, and just a little bit more couldn’t hurt, right? so you start to take even more. but this is only taking away from sober you, which is painful and difficult and even scarier than what compelled you to take it in the first place, so of course you can’t stop now. now you want to take even more, you NEED to take even more. sober life becomes harder and harder to bear, especially compared to how much easier everything is on the substance. now you’re not only using it to enjoy that feeling anymore, you’re using it to hide from what you’re turning into without it, from what you’ve already turned into.

every minute that you’re sober is spent counting down the days until you can use again, and the ends of being high are spent dreading going back. the sober self is upset and jealous at how irresponsible the high self is. the high self is upset at how much of a buzzkill the sober self is, and wishes they could exist on their own, without requiring their sober tether to existence. but the sober and high selves are the same person, you are one, and you become jealous and angry at yourself for ruining your own life in a vain attempt to become an impossible version of yourself that you most desire to be.

you want so badly to have all—and only all—of the best parts that you milk yourself dry, until you end up with all—and nothing but all—of the bad parts. by the time you truly feel that you have indeed lost everything and know you need to stop, the damage is already done, and there is no going back. you wish you had stopped at the first chance, you wish you had never started to begin with. and even then for many people the only way to deal with this terrifying, painful reality is to use even more, because you have made this terrifying, painful life without your substance feel unliveable, even scarier yet than what had made you use in the first place. there is nothing left to do but to hide from your own life, and the only ways to do this are to stop, to love yourself and take care of the person that you are now… or to keep taking more and more, using until there is truly nothing left, not even yourself.

[evilherehotel]

so that new episode huh