adhd-attention-deficit-dumbass

[adhd-attention-deficit-dumbass]

do you have any recommendations for how to handle an understimulating university environment? i dropped out a year and a half ago after failing spectacularly, then realised i had adhd.

i remember being incredibly bored in every class despite the degree being the thing i'm most interested in. help, how do i fix this? i really would like to go back some day!

Hello! Thank you for your question❤️

Apologies for the late reply, depression has really been kicking my butt this year.

As someone who has struggled with this exact thing I will tell you right away that it isn’t an easy fix. It’s a process and you might have to go through some trial and error before you find something that works for you. I can’t promise I have the right answer for you but I will do my best.

What I can offer are some suggestions on how maintain your interest and thus your focus and motivation.

1. Make the subject more interesting

This can be tricky when you’re doing something you already know you enjoy but still feel understimulated. Try finding or incorporating at least one tiny tidbit of information that interest you and focus on that in order to keep up your general interest.

As an example: I once took a class on the history of crisis, and there was a lot of stuff in there that didn’t really interest me even though I liked the subject in general. It was hard to motivate myself at the start. However I was able to incorporate one of my special interests into my essay for that class and that made the entire thing much more enjoyable because I was able to gush and learn more about my special interest.

2. Stimulate yourself to prevent boredom🧠

The general idea is to occupy yourself with something minor that allows you to listen and participate without suffering through overwhelming understimulation. Some suggestions are:

Making fun/interesting notes. Draw charts, diagrams, make little boxes or circles around your text, draw arrows, add little thought bubbles or clouds, whatever floats your boat.

Drawing

Fidget toys, they can be anything for a ball of sticky putty, necklaces, rings, kneadable erasors to just a simple hairtie.

Fidgeting, some examples of non-disruptive fidgeting are: rolling or twirling a pen between your fingers (resist the alluring urge to click your pen so as not to bother others), dangling your legs back and forth, wiggling your feet/toes, tapping your fingers against each other, chewing gum etc

Knitting/crocheting/other hand-based work that is easily portable.

Be aware that some of these require that you not get too distracted by what you’re doing, it might be a good idea to try different things until you find one that doesn’t take away too much of your concentration.

3. Use external motivators

This one might be a hit or miss depending on your personality but for many people external motivation can really help you stay focused when internal motivation is lacking. Some examples of external motivators are:

Sitting in front. By sitting in front you have a more direct view of the person speaking and this helps engage you in what they’re teaching. You also have their eyes on you more often which will act as an external reminder to pay attention.

Join studious peers. This works as a sort of body double system. If I see that the people next to me are paying close attention that makes me want to do the same.

Reward yourself when you successfully maintain focus with something you look forward to. This can be anything from getting a treat to some extra minutes gaming time later that day, whatever sparks your dopamine.

As an example: I used to have 45-minute lectures with a 10-15 minute break and then another 45-60 minute lecture after that. If I had paid attention and made good notes after the first 45 minutes I would treat myself to coffe and a pastry from the caféteria during our break. This was a way for me to reward myself for doing a good job. So whenever I felt my motivation lacking I would remind myself that I needed to pay attention if I wanted that cinnamon bun later on.

🌼I hope these answers were helpful to you. Remember to be kind to yourself and don’t judge yourself if things don’t work out right away. 🌼

Thank you for reading and good luck🌼

[adhd-attention-deficit-dumbass]

This might be random and unrelated but I'm a high school senior taking my final exams which in my country determine the next 4 years of my life. it's now 4 days to the start of test season and Despite prepping well and feeling confident I woke up today to an empty mind. The mocks I took today were awful and I can't really speak to my parents about this as we aren't on speaking terms due to my grades seeing a drop before this. I'm consumed by brain fog and lack of motivation and feel completely lost on how to get back to the way I was yesterday, feeling equipped to handle this. My mind floods up with random details from ages ago?? I'm sorry...Kindly advise

Thank you for your question.

First of all, apologies that this reply is insanely late. Depression hit me like a brick wall this past year. I hope your exams went well and that you’re doing okay❤️

It sounds to me like all the pressure to perform is making you really anxious causing you to blank. Some general advice is to try and exercise or go for a walk as studies show it is a very efficient way to lessen anxiety. As well as mindfullness, meditation or any other generic anxiety reducing activity.

On a more specific note anxiety can really mess you up and for me taking walks just don’t cut it.

The most important ”technique” I’ve learned is called SOAS, and I learned it from a swedish book about ADHD. For translation reasons we’ll call it SOAR

It stands for

S-Stop

O-Observe

A-Accept

R-Release/Respond

It works kinda like this:

Whenever you have a strong overwhelming feeling (like anxiety) pause for a moment and stop. Take a couple deep breaths and take a moment to reflect.

Observe what is going on in your mind and body. What are you thinking/feeling? Maybe you feel scared, afraid to dissapoint yourself and/or others. Maybe your heart is racing or your jaw is clenched. Don’t try to stop or correct anything you’re doing just…observe.

Try your best to accept the way you’re feeling right now. Don’t judge yourself or your emotions by labeling them as ”good” or ”bad” emotions just, acknowledge and accept that they exist. ”I am stressed & anxious. Even if I don’t like it. That’s just how it is right now.”

Finally decide whether you’re going to respond to or release your emotions. This can be tricky. It’s not always clear which answer is ”right” in the moment but I’ll explain them both.

Responding to a feeling means we make a concious decision to act upon it. Our feelings exist to protect us and help us navigate the world. If you feel afraid upon seeing a lion about to pounce on you, then responding to the feeling by running away is probably the sensible thing to do.

By ”releasing” a feeling on the other hand we decide to let go of it and make a concious effort to not act upon that feeling. Sometimes this means taking a deep breath and moving on with your day but with particularily strong emotions it might feel impossible to just let it go. Sometimes to release the feeling you have to actively act against it.

If fear tells us to run away and avoid something, lets say a social interaction, with lots of new people (an introverts worst nightmare) then in order to release the feeling we have to the opposite of what it tells us. Go say hello, socialise, make that phone call, apologise to that friend you’re angry with that you really don’t want to apologise to. It’ll help you overcome the intensity of the feeling and with time and practice the feeling will lessen.

🌻Apologies about the wall of text. I hope this was at least somewhat helpful. If you made it this far, thank you for reading and have a nice day.🌻

[adhd-attention-deficit-dumbass]

Is it a sign of adhd if i want to do something but my mind would be like that would be exhausting even if it is something simple like a 3 step skincare and won't let me do it?

Hello friend👋🏻 thank you for you question!

My ’official’ answer to this is that I cannot determine if any singular behavior is a sign of ADHD because ADHD is a complex collection of symptoms which has a severe negative impact on a person’s life. It’s important to remember that it is the collective experience and severity of the symtoms which determines whether it is ADHD or not.

With that said, to me it sounds like you’re describing a situation where you have difficulty starting a task, even a seemingly small one. This can be a sign of executive dysfunction, which is a common occurence in people with ADHD.

However, the most important thing isn’t to determine whether or not what you’re experiencing is a cause of ADHD. The most important thing to consider is how much this is affecting your life in a negative way. If you are experiencing any form of chronic behavior issues that severly affects you in a negative way on a daily basis you should definetly seek treatment regadless if it’s related to ADHD or not.

I hope this answer was satisfactory andhelpful and I wish you good luck 🌼💛

[adhd-attention-deficit-dumbass]

*Crying hysterically on the phone with my mom*

Me: ”Omg mom I can’t find my phone anywhere! I’m going to be late for class! I don’t know what to do!😭😭😭😭”

Mom: ”Sorry sweetie I can’t talk right now. I can’t find my phone anywhere and I’m late for a meeting, talk to you later”

*hangs up*

This has been an ADHD-joke fresh from my rotted brain, you’re welcome and I’m sorry💀💀💀

[adhd-attention-deficit-dumbass]

Hi I was today years old when I realized some people truly don’t have to think about every single thing they do. They don’t have to have an imaginary set of rules (I’m not allowed to put on my bra until I’ve brushed my teeth) to function.

[adhd-attention-deficit-dumbass]

Just some adorable cat lights in my home town I thought I’d share

[adhd-attention-deficit-dumbass]

if you’re struggling lately, i hope this reaches you.

we will be okay. you will be okay. you will grow and evolve and heal. you will enjoy life again even if it’s not the same as it was the last time you were happy. you will live your life not feeling stuck. you will do more than survive. you will thrive.

[adhd-attention-deficit-dumbass]

A reminder to all of you for the new year

[adhd-attention-deficit-dumbass]

PSA - If you are walking your dog without a leash in a shared public space you are kind of being a dick🐕

I had a period of severe anxiety especially when walking outside. Despite this I did my best to force myself to go outside once a day if only for a few minutes to improve my physical and mental well-being.

So there I am doing my little walk around the neighborhood already struggling to keep my anxiety in check, I’m almost home, relieved that the torture of going outside is almost over. I look behind me (as you do when you expect the world to pounce on you at any second) and I see a woman walking with a big dog unleashed. The dog is walking next to her no problem not looking agressive at all.

Now I’m not afraid of dogs in any way shape or form. We had a giant rottweiler growing up so I really have no reason to be afraid, but since I was already overwhelmed with anxiety this really freaked me out and I started walking faster, but so did the dog lady.

I actually don’t know if what happened next really happened the way I remember it, but I keep looking back and they keep getting closer. In that moment I remember a close family friend who got attacked and bit in the head on a walk by an unleashed dog. I think about the stitches she had to get, how she became so afraid of encountering dogs that she couldn’t take her own dog for walks any longer. Thee lady and the dog keep coming closer and I start panicking even though I’m fully convinced that this dog looks nowhere near even considering attacking. Next thing I know, I look back again and I see this big black dog running up behind me and just scream like I’ve never screamed before.

I step off the trail and sort of freeze. Embarrased but also afraid and I end up sitting down and sort of rocking myself trying to control my anxiety.

The dog lady comes over and tells me

”It’s okay, he’s friendly.”

She gives me this look like she doesn’t know what to think of me. I start profusely apologizing explaining that I just got really scared but that I’m actually fine. She doesn’t really buy it (understandably as I was starting to hyperventilate) She sort of half-heartedly asks if there’s anything she can do and I tell her to please put a leash on her dog. However rather than doing that she starts telling me over and over how friendly and safe the dog is and I just kinda shut her out just asking her to please leave. So she does. I sit in the grass for a good 10-15 minutes probably trying to calm myself down, feeling incredibly ashamed and guilty over having such a big emotional reaction which is of course not helping me calm down.

As I’m trying to muster the courage to get up and walk the remaining 2 minutes back home the lady returns without the dog and again asks if she can do something to help (which was actually really nice of her but in the moment it just made things worse as I felt pressured to ”feel better” for the sake of easing her discomfort) I kept telling her

”Thank you but no, I just need some time to calm down”

After going back and forth a bit she eventually leaves and after an additional 5-10 minutes I’m able to get back up, finish my walk and return to the safety of my home where I break down in tears. Ashamed of my reaction but also just so angry.

Listen, dog people, I get it. Your pup is probably super well trained and wouldn’t hurt a fly. I believe you, but just because you know they’re well behaved doesn’t mean other people know. Even if they know fear can be incredibly irrational and difficult to control. It should be obvious that in shared public spaces you should be respectful of others by leashing your dog. There are dedicated spaces for dogs to run about without a leash but on your daily walk where you have a high likelyhood of encountering lots of people is not that space. It’s unsafe not only for others but for your dog. Some people may attempt to attack your dog out of fear in order to defend themselves.

So please, for the safety and well-being of everyone, just leash your dog

[adhd-attention-deficit-dumbass]

Which one is your favourite? @thoughtstherapy

[adhd-attention-deficit-dumbass]

ADHD Tip:

✨Stay fit by constantly being late for things so you have to run everywhere in order to arrive just in time panting really loud.✨

[adhd-attention-deficit-dumbass]

Hi. I saw your post about being a uni student with ADHD. I’ve just started uni and am struggling to keep on top of all my tasks, uni work and otherwise. Any tips on managing life so it doesn’t all build up?

Hi, thank you for your question!❤️

Unfortunetly I am not qualified to answer this one as this is still my biggest struggle with uni.

My only advice is to be incredibly honest with your teachers about your struggles. 9/10 times they will be super understanding. You could also let them know in advance that you are struggling to keep up and let them know you might hand in things late. If you need help writing a good excuse email you should try Goblintools. It’s incredibly handy.

Sorry I couldn’t be more helpful, best of luck to you!

[adhd-attention-deficit-dumbass]

The current method for treating my various health issues is basically stacking one medicine atop another to combat the side effects of the original treatment like a house of cards, everything works as long as noone breathes too closely to it.

-oh you’ve got ADHD? Here take this, now you have no more racecar brain. Btw your heart beats really fast and you should worry about it. Like, a lot, maybe have a panic attack idk

-oh, you’ve got a high pulse and anxiety from your ADHD-meds? No prob, here have some beta-blockers.

-oh your endometriosis is causing you pain? No biggie, have an IUD. Btw you’re depressed now.

-your IUD is making you depressed?! say hello to your new anti-depressants!

-chronic fatigue from depression and hypermobility? Here these will give you more energy.

-can’t sleep because of your being awake medicine? It’s okay, have some sleepy pills!

In conclusion, my current health status has the same energy as:

but hey, if it works it works 🤷‍♀️

[adhd-attention-deficit-dumbass]

”Failing doesn’t mean you have to quit”- Tips from a university student with ADHD📚

So I’ve been in uni for like….*squints at calendar* almost 5 years, (yikes) and in that time I’ve learned the value of failing.

More specificly I failed a lot of tests, handed in a bunch of assignments late and what I learned from these experiences is that failing an exam…or several of them, is not the end of the world and perhaps more importantly not the end of your plans for the future. I was convinced at several points during these years that because I failed an exam or even a whole course, it would be the end of my academic future and possibly career. I never thought I’d ever graduate but here I am five years later with a bachelor’s degree and now on my way to a master’s.

Failing doesn’t mean you have to quit what you’re doing or give up on your dreams.

It just means you have to get up and try again and if it’s one thing people with ADHD are good at it’s trying. We’re always trying to do better, improve our lives, and as long as you keep trying you’ve never truly failed.

[adhd-attention-deficit-dumbass]

Technically, it's not a book, so I don’t know if it’s useful for your thesis. But I read the transcripts from the Hacking Your ADHD podcast. It might be helpful as it’s a self-help podcast?

Either way good luck with your masters 🫶🫶

Super tip! Thank you so much🫶🏻

[adhd-attention-deficit-dumbass]

High functioning doesn't mean your disability is easy or doesn't impact you. It just means your disability doesn't make you useless to Capitalism. I have ADHD and Autism and am considered "High Functioning" because I can speak and hold down a full time job, but it's so exhausting to just barely do this that I basically can't do anything else. 100% of my free time is spent recovering from work, I have no hobbies, almost no friends, and I'm not close to my family because I don't have the time or energy for the actual life that my job is supposed to enable me to live. I am not "High Functioning", I am barely holding myself together.

I am invisibly disabled. The impact of my disability is not seen or respected by able society and so I am given a label that sends the message, "I am diagnosed with a disability, but it does not disable me." This message is a lie that forces me to overexert myself in the name of Capital.

My disability is not easy to live with. I can work, or I can be happy, but I cannot do both, and I am so, so tired.

[adhd-attention-deficit-dumbass]

Hi, I never got diagnosed, but I'm very suspicious I have ADHD. I have noticed that I have huge trouble remembering plots of books, movies etc. When I finish it, several days after I'm unable to describe the plot. I only remember very vague details or a few very specific situations, but that's it. Is it normal? Is it ADHD, or something different? Thanks for answering, I hope this makes any sense

Hello 👋🏻 thank you for your question! 😊

While it is impossible for me to determine if any particular ”symptom” is related to ADHD or not I feel a need to clarify some things because I get these sorts of questions quite often.

-Disclaimer-

(The following is not directly aimed at you anon I simply thought your question might resonate with a lot of people and would be a fitting introduction to the discussion. If you feel I have overstepped in this case feel free to DM me and I’ll remove the post)

ADHD has many symptoms that can feel relatable because most of them are part of a very basic human experience. Everyone has struggles with memory, disorganisation, time-management etc.

The main thing to consider is not the symptoms themselves. Not all ADHD people are the same and they all have vastly different experiences. My psychiatrist once told me;

”I have 100 patients with ADHD and all of them have different problems with their ADHD that require different solutions.”

The one thing that all ADHD people do have in common however is that their symptoms are so severe that they have a significant negative impact on their daily life.

It is important to realise that ADHD is not just a set of behaviors but a debilitating disability.

In my opinion what matters the most in considering an ADHD diagnosis is not the symptoms per say but rather their severity.

—

I hope this answer was at least somewhat helpful anon😅 sorry if it was too much of a rant. Your question is really appreciated. Thank you for reading.

I hope you have a nice day☀️✨