andrewgraveshands

[andrewgraveshands]

I saw Nemlei at a grocery store in Detroit yesterday. I told her how cool it was to meet her in person, but I didn’t want to be a douche and bother her and ask her for an autograph or anything.

She said, “Oh, like you’re doing now?”

I was taken aback, and all I could say was “Huh?” but she kept cutting me off and going “huh? huh? huh?” and closing her hand shut in front of my face. I walked away and continued with my shopping, and I heard her chuckle as I walked off. When I came to pay for my stuff up front I saw her trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen Milky ways in her hands without paying.

The girl at the counter was very nice about it and professional, and was like “Ma'am, you need to pay for those first.” At first she kept pretending to be tired and not understand English, but eventually turned back around and brought them to the counter.

When she took one of the bars and started scanning it multiple times, she stopped her and told her to scan them each individually “to prevent any electrical infetterence,” and then turned around and winked at me. I don’t even think that’s a word. After she scanned each bar and put them in a bag and started to say the price, she kept interrupting her by yawning really loudly.

[andrewgraveshands]

💛: I know who you pretend I am...

[andrewgraveshands]

sorry 4 kinda abandoning ill posf sometjmes im just not a big poster

[andrewgraveshands]

I wonder if something could be said about Ashley's apparent penchant for drawing.

Leyley used to draw a lot. This, in itself, is nothing special: many kids draw as a hobby. The most noteworthy thing is that Leyley loved to draw so much, she'd do it on the walls, which Andy had to clean...

... and on Andy's notes, which made it difficult for him to study.

I don't need to say that this is just one of the many ways Leyley begged for attention and approval, which most surely had the opposite effect.

However, what made me pause a bit are three completely separate scenes.

This is in the very opening of the game:

We don't see Ashley drawing as an adult, but she doesn't seem to be very confident in herself. Then again, at this point in the game, it could be just goodhearted self-deprecation. It does say something, however, that she's still clinging onto that drawing, both because it's so old and not good-looking, and what it represents.

This is after Ashley, as a teen, has a meltdown over Andrew "seeing Julia":

Andrew is being mean, but to be fair to him, he's also angry and interprets the torn drawing as a way to make him feel bad, so I'll let it pass. The artstyle is so crude, I assume this is another old drawing: the lemon muffin is a reference to a way Andy celebrated Leyley's birthday when they were kids, so it's possible she drew it back then. And then kept it for years, before destroying it in a fit of heartbroken rage. It's how she conveyed her love for her brother, and it was that important to her, that apparently, she still had it in grabbing and tearing vicinity. Her hate for Nina is as important as her love for Andrew.

(the other option is, of course, that it's a much more recent drawing, and yes, this is a pretty abysmal way of drawing for a teen who apparently has been doing so for years. I still wouldn't call it garbage though, Andrew, she meant well :<)

Not much after that scene, Andrew also tells us this:

Whether Ashley still draws in her teen years or has stopped, at least we know it's more important to her than her homework, and enough for Andrew to comment on it.

And this is an offhand comment Renee makes to her mother while pretending she doesn't regret her life choices and children.

This is how Renee chooses to paint Ashley in a good light: by praising her art. Which is a lie, of course, because even back then she wasn't exactly Leonardo Da Vinci, but hey, grandma doesn't need to know about that. Worthy of note is that, despite doing everything in her power to interact with her daughter as little as possible, she did notice how much Leyley likes to draw (although afawk it could be because she once saw her drawing on the walls, so it's even more of a backhanded compliment).

So I suppose Leyley's cry for attention did work, in part.

It's a running gag that Ashley is a pretty bad artist. More than once, people point out she struggles to draw circles.

Speaking of attention seeking behavior, and how Renee keeps denying it.

So, what do I take from this?

That Ashley had a predisposition for drawing, clearly enjoying it regardless of her talent, and partially did so as a way to yell "look at me! I'm a person too! I have feelings, here they are!" at the world; but that predisposition was never nurtured, neglected as she was. Her art was ugly at best, a bother at worst. So she never developed her artistic skills, stagnated, and now she's a "bad" artist, which she resents. It's quite a shame, because of all the ways you could vent your feelings, art is by far the healthiest. Perhaps she would have been less destructive.

Naturally, this is part of one of the game's key themes: Ashley never grew up. She wasn't given the tools to, and now, she doesn't even want to. So she never developed past the "Leyley" phase of her life, still drawing in a childish way, still "playing" with her bunny plushies in her mind, still clinging onto her child self when Andrew wants nothing more than to grow up (or so he says). Much like her art, she too was seen mostly as an embarrassment, and so never improved. But every scrap of attention Andrew gives her? Means the world to her. And that's why she keeps going.

Lastly: every ending of the game comes with a crude crayon drawing.

It makes me believe that Ashley's art, ugly and childish as it is, is an important part of her, and her perception of the world.

[andrewgraveshands]

Dropping this here.

[andrewgraveshands]

happy late hands dayyy this is cute

[andrewgraveshands]

fuck you all

[andrewgraveshands]

[andrewgraveshands]

Something I really loved about episode 3 was how heavily the puzzles were used to explore Andrew's psyche. It's convoluted and difficult to decipher, for him as well. Because he lies to others but also to himself. And because he's a liar and because he represses so much, because it's his instinct to hide things, there are things you just won't get out of him outright. But there is so, so much that tiny details in all of the puzzles tell you. There is so much you are told just by how this whole part is structured. For a character like him, I think this was a perfectly done dive into his mind.

[andrewgraveshands]

“i can fix h—.” no.

source .

[andrewgraveshands]

fav cg from ch3

happy hands day!

[andrewgraveshands]

real talk tho if u can look at the way andrew treats julia and still spout that 'ashleys the evil one i hope he can be free some day<3' bullshit then youre on levels of misogyny previously unknown to man

[andrewgraveshands]

oh man both the 'shots and such' and 'splat' endings are soooo fun I adore the absolute angst of it all.

It's really sad how much Andrew loves Ashley, but in this route we see what happens when she refuses to grow up and move on from her Leyley persona. He hates Leyley and it's pretty understandable to see why - she was a constant barrier between him and any sort of success - socially, academically, whatever. (Obviously the blame is actually on Renee for not raising her own kid but ya know) Yet despite that, he learned to care about her, and once she grew up into Ashley that's when his feelings shifted from platonic to romantic. But now Ashley is 20 years old, constantly acting like a child throwing a tantrum because she refuses to move on. He very explicitly says exactly this.

And I do understand why she wants to continue acting like a child. makes it really easy to get what she wants, and she can pretend that responsibilities don't exist. everything can be pushed onto Andrew, and as long as Andrew stays Andy, he will continue to be at her beck and call. Or that's what Ashley thinks at least. Really it just makes Andrew resent her even more, because he genuinely loves her, but she doesn't love the real him. she loves the thought of him being around and loving her, protecting her, giving her everything she craves but was always sorely lacking. and in exchange she fucks him, cooks for him, even lets him hit her/take out his anger on her. since in her mind that's what women need to give in a relationship. its all transactional to her, and Andrew knows this.

Ultimately it shows that Andrew and Leyley cannot be happy in a romantic relationship together. Andrew and Ashley could possibly make it work, but in this route it's clear that Ashley stubbornly refuses to change, even if it'll kill her. but hey, at least in the splat ending they get a truly romantic lovers suicide. with their bodies inseparably smashed together forever

[andrewgraveshands]

MINORS DNI

Spoilers for the ‘splat’ ending.

Just played the new part of TCOAAL and im genuinely gagged by the ‘splat’ ending, specifically with Ashley’s whole part at the end. Honestly their dynamic is so insane. Obviously to a big extent it is just a fetish game but that part somehow struck so hard.

It makes you think a lot more about Andrew specifically. I mean in that ending he says to her how he had wanted to have sex with her for a while and it begins to go to an entirely different level of fucked up. I mean, Ashley knows nothing other than Andrew, and to some extent he allowed this, especially allowed it to get _that_ bad.

Ohhh i dont even know what to think on it really, i havent done the cliffhanger ending yet because me and my friend really had to call it a night there.

I havent seen ANYONE talking about it other than tiktok and i refuse to acknowledge people on there since they’re usually too young to even consider looking at this type of genre.

Anyways i just wanted to quickly speak about it to get it out my system cause i genuinely am shocked.

(Maybe expect more writing about it? I dont remember the last time i did anything oops)

[andrewgraveshands]

ashley is such a broken girl, it's sad.

everyone in her entire life, even on some accounts her own brother, has told her that she is an insignificant, small, useless, loud, annoying, childish and irritating thing. everyone either talks bad about her directly, or has negative thoughts about her in the back of their minds. and she just lives in the label because she has, really, genuinely NEVER felt real love and affection before.

her parents conditioned her to be clingy to the one source of love that she could possibly scrape up. and even then, andy only loved her initially out of a familial obligation that he was groomed into upholding by his own mother, it's only with time (as stated in-game) that andrew grew to love ashley.

shes like a feral cat with no direction, she can't even trust the small crumbs of affection she DOES get from others, because theres ALWAYS a caviot, surely! so she pre-emptively lets the other know through aggression that she SEES through their "facade of love", "whens the carpet being pulled!! wheres the cameras!! because surely it must be a joke!!"

shes so neglected that even when she DOES receive love she doesn't know HOW to take it, so she just... responds in the only way she know how to. its so indecipherable in her brain to receive this affection that she just defaults to anger or discomfort because of its unfamiliarity. shes so lonely that shes convinced herself that Other People aren't worth it, because when have they ever been for her?

its why it makes me so upset to see people demean ashley to a one-note abuser with a shitty mom. shes so fucking scared and lonely you don't even KNOW. shes a cat that hisses and scratches at getting pet. shes scared.

[andrewgraveshands]

novel analgesic

[andrewgraveshands]

i hope andrew kills himself

i hope he attempts and it fails and he comes to me sobbing and i hold him while patting his hair silently as i know i cant comfort him genuienly