six years later I have a silly conversation with my client and we laugh at work. I work partime now so I have the rest of the day to create art. my colleagues are literally my family. I make some friends at the art museum. i pet stray kittens on my way back home. sometimes I have baking fails when i invite my friends for a birthday party but it's okay because we laugh it off and someone says they're going to remember this day forever.
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i want to call nandini 😭 and vio 😭 and cleo 😭 and Alissa 😭 and Edith 😭 and Chiara 😭 and anna 😭 and Elyn 😭
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wish I could call my mutuals and talk to them on the phone or something about this because it's so scary and I feel like I should just take the decision because I've been indecisive long enough and there is no right option only what feels right to me right now and ugh
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its SOOOOOO hard to say it. even on tumblr. it's so hard to say what I'm choosing because then it's out there and it's real. and that scares the shit out of me
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me seeing the swifties in my phone come up with nice theories and connecting all the themes and motifs while i do nothing
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mutuals hold my hand im making a decision
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mutuals hold my hand im making a decision
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KNOW ITS FOR THE BETTER
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VEE HOAX! ART! SOMEDAY!
nandini get off anon
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for being here. for fighting. for trying. for perservering. for getting up everyday and doing it anyway. for sticking around for yourself and others. for wanting to build a life for yourself. for having a passion. just for living.
im proud of you because you are so many beautiful things and even though life has beaten you down so much you are still here and trying with everything you have. you are truly so amazing and I am so proud of you and will continue to tell you that ❤️.
i don't know what to say. this is .....i don't deserve it . and you might say I do. but no, i don't. and it's okay. thank you so much for this. i hope you know I'm proud of you too, and i honestly mean it. you've been so supportive and caring to me and it's kinda bad that I haven't really asked you how you were all those times. so this is me asking how you are right now and telling u if you ever need someone, im here for you
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the air is thick with loss and indecision
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you love a song. and then you're a different person and you don't love that song anymore. that doesn't mean the love wasn't there
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shaming myself and feeling guilty has NEVER helped me so I keep pushing the thoughts away when I have them but oh God being kind to myself isn't getting me anywhere because it takes time for things like this to work
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might fuck it and have that soda
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