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[aro-in-danyl]

Dad Jokes - AppleRadio

I don't think I've read a single fic where Alastor and Lucifer get together because they make each other laugh. I need to see them being cringey old-ass qpr pals with combined -1000 rizz somehow charming the other by having horrible taste in humor.

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No one remembers who started it but hardly a day can go by without Alastor and Lucifer trading dad jokes back and forth like a hot potato.

As soon as one catches sight of the other BOOM cringe-ass pun and without fail the other will burst into uncontrollable laughter.

And the jokes are bad. Like really bad. Not even Charlie can find the silver-lining (and she has tried). Listening to them laugh at those truly horrible jokes sparks an avalanche of second-hand embarrassment on the part of everyone within ear shot.

It eventually gets to the point that just looking at each other triggers a Pavlovian response where they just giggle and wheeze before the other can even tell a joke.

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Someone: Really? You want to be with that guy?

Alastor or Lucifer: He makes me laugh :)

[aro-in-danyl]

[aro-in-danyl]

A really funny idea would be that practically all main Alastor ships are canon, but Alastor HIMSELF is the only one who doesn't know he's in a polycule. (RadioRose, RadioHusk, RadioDust, RadioApple)

(They don't tell him because he doesn't handle being confronted with caring about others very well, and the last time it was implied, he ghosted and didn't talk to Husk for almost a decade. Alastor is very dedicated to being the untouchable Radio Demon, and if you try to make him come to terms with the idea of being Perceived, he freaks out.)

And so, when Angel and Husk notice Lucifer and Alastor starting to circle each other, they grab Lucifer to tell him the Rules of the Polycule.

H: "Hey, we noticed you giving Al eyes, we wanted to let you know how to go about this since he's dating us too."

L: "Oh shit! I'm sorry I didn't mean to-"

H: "Nah, you're welcome in. We just gotta give you the ground rules because the last time I didn't, it didn't end well for anyone."

L: "What."

A: "Smiles isn't big on being seen as soft, so you just gotta avoid letting him know he IS, is all."

H: "Here's our current schedule, let us know the best times for you and we'll adjust it fairly."

L: "You....you have a SCHEDULE???"

And they hand him a sheet that's basically like:

No telling Alastor about the polycule!

No telling Alastor anything that implies he is soft or cares about you or anyone in the polycule! (He WILL disappear for another 7 years, and everyone else in the polycule will be mad at you)

No trying to force Alastor into doing anything with you (Obviously!)

Ask before joining someone else's Alastor Time(tm) (One on one time isn't always required, but it's just rude to hijack it for no reason)

Try to stick to the schedule the best you can (adjustments are allowed with prior notice, other conflicts, or Alastor himself asking you to do something outside your time)

Dating others (in and outside the polycule) is fine, just be respectful

Respect everyone else in the polycule!

VOX IS NOT ALLOWED IN THE POLYCULE

DO NOT LET VOX SEE THE SCHEDULE

L: "What's...what's with numbers 8 and 9? The TV guy???"

H: "Ugh, he's the reason FOR these rules! I tried to let him join me and Rosie a few years back, and instead he tried to make Alastor his own, permanently. Not only did he tell Alastor that they were dating, and tried to force him to join the Vees, he tried to kick me and Rosie out of the picture! Dealing with that mess was a NIGHTMARE. It took Rosie months to get him to talk to her again, and he practically ignored me before he completely disappeared. We JUST got everything back to normal after that mess."

L: "Uh, okay. Got it, no Vox."

And then, without Alastor ever noticing, he just gets another member of his polycule.

[aro-in-danyl]

Look I need more trans fem alastor so here' my post of

Trans Fem!Alastor HCs

It takes her a century to figure out her gender, and she still doesn't figure it out until Angel forces her to sit down infront of his power point

She doesn't change her name because she finds it funny and ironic. Alastor means Avenger. And the last name I hc her with means Purity. So her name means Avenger of Purity and she thinks that is peak comedy

Somehow, her dad jokes got worse.

Husk accepts her, but he's still grumpy to her and sometimes scared of her. Girl or not, that's the fucking radio demon damnit.

Rosie insists on dressing her. Alastor has no taste in fashion and coming out as trans is not going to fix that

She has cousins in hell. The only stink they make about it is now their numbers are skewed. There are now 3 girls and 2 boys. This causes a bit of a civil prank war within the group. It lasts for days. Alastor brought home a win on the last day, her two cousins admitting defeat at the hands of the master.

The only riot Vox causes is because He didn't see the signs before everyone else. They had been friends before, he kept up with most modern ideas. But he didn't relise people could trans their gender and now he's pouting he couldn't "help" her on her gender journey. Velvette thinks he's being fucking pathetic.

Velvette BEGS her to update her style. She doesn't of course, and makes all kinds of bitchy comments about with filled with laughter. So Velvette settles for giving her a box of vintage jewelry she's never going to wear. Alastor is going to pretend she isn't touched. She does wear a broch Velvette gave her as a part of her new outfit. Velvette considers it a win

Charlie slips up and accidentally calls her mom once. She's nonchalant and supportive about it, but inside she's screaming crying throwing up. She hates that she's so emotional about it

She doesn't end up getting surgeries or treatment or anything. That would be going too close to a doctor for her liking. Too close to asking for help. Besides, she hates change and enough has changed already. Give her a few years, and she might come around to the idea of having Lucifer magically trans her gender for her. She's just got to get used to the whole 'having come out as trans thing'.

One time, someone made a comment about her. And she reminded all of hell exactly who she is. She's the radio demon, and she got to power by being the most terrifying and overpowered soul she could be. No one made a comment about her again.

Zestiel doesn't quite get it, but he's supportive and stays close to her (I'm a big fan of the grandad zestiel stuff it's really cute)

Susan still picks on her. But she is glad that she got rid of that stupid Bob and let her curls grow out. She gives a lot of backward compliments that Alastor is just used to

When Carmilla saw her at the next over lord meeting, she just raised an eyebrow and didn't say anything about it. For once, Alastor didn't try to bring the subject to her latest venture.

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Nifty and Lucifer fight over Al's shoulder space.

I love all the art depicting Alastor and Lucifer posing like badasses ready for a fight, like the ones where Lucifer is up on Alastor's shoulders, wings spread wide open on full threat display.

I'm so glad we're all on the same page about that.

But please imagine- he just lives up there.

He's an angel he can just make himself weigh nothing, or Alastor's a demon, he's got inhuman strength. But I'm really leaning into Lucifer doing most of the magicking about it so he can sit is progressively more unbalanced positions, and in no way imped on Alastor adhd ass moving all around all the time.

Either way they're just walking around the hotel like that.

Making dinner? Lucifer's up there, legs wrapped around him to keep out of the way, as he stirs one pot, and Alastor checks another.

Running inspections on guests, because SOMEONE flooded the third floor trying to flush their stash? Lucifer's just sittting cross legged on one shoulder, reading a book.

Alastor's pacing his studio, talking with a regular caller, and Lucifer has slid down his back like a koala, legs kicking behind him, arms wrapped around Alastor's neck tight enough it should be choking him, but magic, so he can stick his ear to the other side of the phone cause he's a mess bitch too and he loves the gossip.

Like the other haven't seen Lucifer's feet on the ground in weeks.

Do they have some bet going? Are they playing the world's weirdest game of gay chicken??

Does Luicfer just like to feel tall?

Some one called it Stacked Dads

Stacked dads au!!!!!

[aro-in-danyl]

Smol Alastor is back and he's heckin' ruthless

I'm experimenting with how I wanna do comics. I have a few I wanna do that are Hazbin Hotel related as well as others.

[aro-in-danyl]

IDEA(s) APPLERADIO

Lucifer love bites/kiss Alastor

Cat and Mouse AppleRadio and Alastor denies enjoying the chase or denies how deer instinct get stronger when Lucifer is near and vanishes out of existence (fanfics that do this are my top favorite whether they do this intentionally or not)

Alastor doesn't kiss, he lick <333

If they argue they rarely remember what it was about

Alastor follows Lucifer

He yeets away when Lucifer tries to surprise him with a hug or stops and goes for a peck

Lucifer fights the urge to turn around when he feels Alastor's presence behind him because he knows Al will run

Al denies it every time Lucifer brings it up

The first few weeks into their relationship Al would keep a strict distance from Lucifer and be the one to initiate touch

A few times Lucifer tried reciprocating Al would freeze up, flinch, and/or put distance between them

They are really bad at communicating so it leads to misunderstandings and fights

The two men often 'butt heads' but it's a thing Al does on a whim to show affection, but because it's Lucifer Alastor shoves his head a bit too hard and knocks the man into the ground, which is still hilarious as he sprints away from Lucifer's grabby hands

Chasing is a thing deer do when they're courting: So when Lucifer chases Al could be enjoying it but it's hard to tell

Petty bitches who say "fuck you" back and forth and Angel's dumbass says something lewd that stops them both and they're staring at the spider "Stfu I'm telling [my husband] off for being a jackass"

[aro-in-danyl]

advice i think we should tell children is that when adults say stuff like ‘now that i’m an adult i get really excited about stuff like coffee tables and bathrooms and rugs etc’ they don’t mean ‘and now i don’t care about blorbo and squimbus from my childhood tv shows anymore’ bc your average adult still loves all the same pop culture stuff they always did; they just have a greater appreciation for the mundane as well. growing up just means you can enjoy life twice as much now. you can get really excited about a new stuffed animal AND about a new kitchen sponge. peace and love

[aro-in-danyl]

Some of you may have already realized this, but the title of this AU has two meanings. The first: time travel. The second: destabilization.

[aro-in-danyl]

the audacity of that guy

[aro-in-danyl]

Your headcanons are so scrumptious I want to crawl inside your brain.

All jokes aside, I love all of the detail and thought you put into this!!! And all of the historical references, I'm definitely going to look them all up in more detail later.

Human Alastor (FTM trans headcanon)

Full size image

Commentary below:

Here, Alastor is shown at four different stages of his human life:

Childhood - around 12 years old

“Voodoo Killer” - late teenage years

Jazz Musician - early 20s

Radio Star - later adulthood to time of death

His career as a serial killer started when he was around 12 years old and continued up until his death.

The three stages of his adult life are supposed to correspond with different aspects of his demon form’s hairstyle.

During the “Voodoo Killer” stage, he straightened his hair and styled it similarly to his demon form’s hairstyle. However, he did not have an undershave. If viewed from the back, it would look like a simple bob. His appearance is inspired by Clementine Barnabet. I intended for his tignon to be tied in a similar manner to Clementine’s. Additionally, the bandages wrapped around his legs are meant to make him look a little like Voodoo Queen Lala from the 1930s. I gave him bandages instead to make him look like more of an edge lord (lol). The cross worn was originally his mother's. After she died, he painted it black in mourning. He wears it at all times, up until his death, to remember her.

During the “Jazz Musician” stage, he kept his hair short in order to pass for male. This is supposed to correspond with the back side of Alastor’s demon form, which is shaved short. His appearance is inspired by Jelly Roll Morton, one of my favorite Jazz musicians, who also happens to be Creole. Not visible in this pose, but Al wore black gloves that match the color of his hair. 

During the “Radio Star” stage, several aspects of Alastor’s appearance are inspired by the late, great Cab Calloway. Like Cab, Alastor styled his hair in a conk. His suit is also inspired by the iconic white suit worn by Cab Calloway.

That being said, creative liberties were taken with Al’s white suit, which is anachronistic for the 1930s. Cab famously wore zoots, but I don’t think that would be Alastor’s style. Since I know so little about 1930s fashion, I gave up and didn’t attempt to give him a historically accurate suit. Instead, his tuxedo is based on the one he wore in the pilot. There are several anachronisms present in Alastor’s canon design, so it might actually fit his character to wear a suit atypical of the 1930s. This could preserve the otherworldly, “Willy Wonka”-esque presence that he has, even on Earth. Still, it’s a pretty glaring historical inaccuracy. Once we get to see Al’s canon human form, I might redesign him.

Since Alastor would have more than one suit, I didn’t worry too much about the inaccuracies present in his clothing. The one thing I refused to compromise on was his microphone.  In the TV show, Alastor’s iconic microphone is a vintage ribbon mic. However, this “pill capsule” style looks more similar to models that were only invented after Alastor’s death. Here’s an example of a ribbon mic that was rolled out shortly before Alastor’s death: The RCA Type 77-A. As you can see, it’s a lot larger in size than Alastor’s microphone.

My first attempt at drawing human Alastor gave him a ribbon mic, seen here: https://www.deviantart.com/thegirlwhodidntsmile/art/Human-Alastor-ribbon-mic-1035514228

In order to be more historically accurate, I discarded this design. Instead, I gave him a spring microphone, technology that is more iconic of the 1920s/1930s. 

Here’s an image of Cab Calloway in front of a spring microphone, one year after Alastor’s death:

I took some creative liberties with the flag of Alastor’s microphone. Normally, it is supposed to say the radio station. Since I don’t know what radio station Al’s show aired on, I just had it read “ON AIR” in red.

Importantly, Alastor’s suit has to match the design of his microphone, which is an extension of himself.

It’s a little awkward how Alastor is holding his microphone, so here is how it looks from the back: https://www.deviantart.com/thegirlwhodidntsmile/art/Human-Alastor-back-of-mic-1035514255

The backside of the microphone is supposed to look like an eye, and have a bit of an ominous presence.

A headcanon I have is that Alastor had a severe case of stress-induced vitiligo. Because he was very egotistical, this was a source of shame for him, so he hid it with makeup and clothing. Here is how his face would have appeared shortly before his death: https://www.deviantart.com/thegirlwhodidntsmile/art/Human-Alastor-no-makeup-1035514264

Al’s colors are mostly browns, whites, and black, to keep with the deer theme. The black tips of his shoes are supposed to look a bit like deer hooves. I pictured his height as 5’10, one inch taller than Michael Dillon. Since the average male height was around 5’7, Al was still taller than most men, which made it easier to pass for male.

Bonus image:

https://www.deviantart.com/thegirlwhodidntsmile/art/Alastor-kill-count-1035514155

[aro-in-danyl]

What’s with the trend in comics of Jason going on this long, insightful rant on Bruce’s behaviors and shortcomings only for B to respond like “but murder bad” and that’s considered a valid counter argument?

[aro-in-danyl]

When you summon the devil and he keeps you company at night.

[aro-in-danyl]

honestly steve harrington's character growth from homophobic prom king who's friends are complete assholes and only really cares about himself with a crush on the most perfect girl at school to bisexual single mother of six who's best friend is a lesbian and crush is the metalhead d&d-obsessed school freak who's gotten held back twice and been accused of murder once is not just one of the greatest things to ever come from tv, it is also one of the most absolutely hilarious.

[aro-in-danyl]

Love Square, but it's three assholes trying to get Alastor's attention while he's just oblivious. Lucifer want shim because he's the first in millenia to have the balls to challenge him, Vox because it's Alastor, and Adam because he wants to just piss Lucifer off and do a reverse Uno on him by stealing HIS bitch for once. Angel is both in charge of bets and popcorn distribution

what is the ship name for alastor/adam i need it immediately

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Susan asking Alastor why he broke up with 'that nice Vox boy' and constantly telling Lucifer that Alastor's last 'boyfriend' was so much nicer, more handsome, and more successful than him. Lucifer isn't even aware that he and Alastor are dating, let alone that Alastor had an ex-boyfriend. But he's strangely motivated to win Susan over and prove he's the better suitor for Alastor compared to 'Cox' or whatever his name is.

👀👀👀👀👀

[aro-in-danyl]

i personally need 'em to team up real bad