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batfamgalore · 2 days
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*Dick witnesses a house get robbed and Bruce wants in on the case so Dick takes him to show him the house*
Bruce: All right, which one?
Dick: That one.
Bruce: Yeah? Well that’s a stupid house to rob.
Dick: Does anyone live up to your standards? Maybe we can get a hold of the burglar’s number. You can call. Tell him how disappointed you are.
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batfamgalore · 6 days
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*They’re at a gala and Damian is self conscious because Bruce is giving a lot of attention to someone else’s baby and now Damian is trying to convince Jason that he’s better*
Jason: You’re right, you’re way cuter than a baby. I’m gonna go check on dinner.
*Walks away, turns to Dick who was watching the whole interaction*
Jason: Sometimes I like to just toss a grenade and run away.
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batfamgalore · 6 days
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Roy: Jason, I need you to do this. You’re sneakier than I am. You’re a bigger liar. You have no moral compass.
Jason: Look, thanks for all the compliments, but breaking into one stupid party? That’s not even a challenge.
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batfamgalore · 10 days
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*Batbros just starting to recover after they find out Dick is actually alive. They are on their first fam mission since. Tim starts tearing up but is trying to cover it up*
Dick: What you said at my funeral made me mist up as well. It was wonderful. Really moving.
Jason: You were there?
Dick: Of course. I was in the coffin.
Tim: Oh! I was gonna check there.
Dick: That would’ve been weird.
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batfamgalore · 15 days
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*Bruce and Clark walk a few feet away and tuck their heads to have a “private” conversation.*
Clark: All right, do you remember back in the old days when we had really, really special evidence and we kept it in a secret locker.
Bruce: No.
Clark: I’ll bet you whatever those perps were looking for is in their locker.
Jason: Can we be heard that clearly when we turn around and whisper?
Dick: I sure hope not.
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batfamgalore · 19 days
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*They are both being chased by bad guys that could show up any second*
Dick: Hey, Bea, I’ll drive. Give me the keys.
Bea: You just assume the man drives?
Dick: No, I assume I’m the only one formally trained in evasive maneuver techniques and counter surveillance.
Bea: Okay, valid.
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batfamgalore · 24 days
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Dick: I know nobody asked for my advice-
Jason: Yet, you’re talking.
Dick: I agree with Jason.
Jason: Let’s hear him out.
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batfamgalore · 27 days
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*The Justice League reaches out to Nightwing and tells him they need help on a case. Dick asks Bruce why they asked him*
Bruce: I might have mentioned to the Justice League, accidentally, that you… might be able to help.
Dick: Whoah. Time out. Flag on the play. Did you vouch for me?
Bruce: No. I wouldn’t say exactly I vouched for you.
Dick: Wally, Bruce vouched for me.
Bruce: I did not vouch for you.
Dick: You were bragging on me. You have a dad crush on me.
Bruce: Dick, I was not bragging on you. I was merely stating facts about your track record that are in the newspaper.
Dick: Let’s hug it out.
Bruce: Put your arms down.
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batfamgalore · 29 days
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*Dick wakes up to the Batbros in his kitchen*
Jason: Forks forks. No! You have one fork?
Dick: I’m one person.
Damian: That’s so weird.
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batfamgalore · 1 month
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*talking to Dick, Jason and Tim*
Damian: I’m gonna go and do homework. Don’t knock unless it’s an actual emergency. Not a spider.
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batfamgalore · 1 month
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*Dick and Jason are kidnapped and the evil guy is holding a vial of poison*
Evil guy: One part cyanide, one part strychnine, two parts atropine, with just a shake, not stirred, of boat cleaner. And it’s all for you.
*Points at Jason*
Dick: That’s not gonna work. I can’t watch him die. You’ll have to kill me first.
Jason: You must be out of your damn mind. If you think I’m gonna sit here and die after watching you die with some ridiculous grin on your face because you’re thinking of some stupid pun or something.
Jason: And do you have just the one needle? Do you plan on sterilizing between uses?
Dick: Surely you can’t be serious.
Jason: I don’t know where all you’ve been, Wing.
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batfamgalore · 1 month
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Tim: Okay. Until we know where this thing ends, we should just keep our heads down and try not to draw any attention to ourselves, alright?
*Dick starts a fight*
Damian: What is he doing?
Jason *joining the fight*: I think he’s drawing attention to himself.
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batfamgalore · 1 month
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I wonder if Wonder Woman’s lasso of truth is admissible in court.
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batfamgalore · 1 month
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Jason: You’re gonna believe Catwoman over your own brother?
Dick: Well one of you called me super smart and the other one is yelling at me right now.
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batfamgalore · 2 months
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*Dick just learned that he might have been destined to be a Talon and Bruce has known for a long time but was keeping it a secret*
Dick: Okay I have to go talk to Bruce.
*runs out*
Tim: But wait a minute, Dickie.
Damian: Richard!
Steph: Dick!
*All sit back concerned*
Duke: Whoa.
Cass: Wow.
Jason: So, anyway, I’m trying to get my boss’s ex wife to sleep with me-
Everyone: Jason!
Jason: Oh, but when Dick has a problem, everyone’s all ears!
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batfamgalore · 2 months
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My mom passed away when I was 10, so I get it
Silly story (if you already saw this no you didn’t):
One of my cats is very lovey dovey, she rubs up on ANYBODY and whenever I am sitting down she is trying her best to pin down my hands, lay on my neck, etc. Her twin sister is incredibly antisocial and only exists in proximity to my grandmother. The other day, my dad comes up from behind me with a cat in his arms. I assume it is the cat that can be picked up so I reach for her face and give a good natured squeeze like I normally do to my cat. Only suddenly her entire body shuddered and it dawned on me that my father was holding The Other Cat. Naturally, she lept out of my fathers arms and any tentative peace we have formed in the past 2 years of living together is forever gone. (She’ll let me pet her if i feed her tomorrow lets be real) I felt so bad but i couldn’t stop laughing because she looked so offended. How Dare someone squish her face.
Cats in question:
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Lovey dovey vs antisocial queen
Thank you for reaching out! Hahha!!! I love that you can tell which is which, she’s sitting so proper! My cat is the same way. Hates being pet and then suddenly you bring out the treats…
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batfamgalore · 2 months
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I have been customizing Barbies and dolls of that size to be the Batfam. I also have a doll for Adrian Agreste and Marinette Dupain-Cheng from Miraculous Ladybug.
It has led me to making comments that are fun to say because it sounds so wrong. Example: I’ve been getting heads in the mail. Earlier in the month I got Morgan Freeman’s and this week I agog the perfect head for Alfred: Sir Patrick Stewart. Now if only I could figure out where his body went…
Hahahah!!! Confuse as many people as you can!!! I was in France this summer and my friend and I went on a miraculous boat tour, it was so fun! Love to see how they turn out!!!!
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