bitnotgood28 - Tumblr blog

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the graphic design posts on my instagram feed have influenced me

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To be Wanted

I know I am loved. By friends, by family. I know they want me around, to share in stories and laughter and food. I know they care if I visit or not. But to be wanted? In that way where it feels almost maddening that you could miss the presence of a person so much?  In that way where it feels like you’re walking around, half asleep without them? In the way where it feels both calming and thrilling to have them next to you, to hold their hand? That’s an entirely different feeling.

I wonder what it would be like for you to want me in that way. 

You are stunning! I stagger when you make eye contact with me. What if you felt the same? That you worry you’ll never quite catch your breath when you spot me across the room. Like I take up all your sight, past, present, and future. I can only pray my words don’t completely fail me if ever you were to ask me a question.

To hold your attention feels like winning the lottery. It seems so unlikely to happen. Then there you are, looking at me like I matter, like you care. I don’t even know if I could handle if I ever saw a glimpse of want in your eyes when you look at me. For you to want me? Seems more likely to fly out to Saturn’s rings.

Though I’ll admit, it’s nice to dream about flying through a field of ice and cosmic dust with stars in the background. 

It’s nice to imagine what it would be like for you to pull me close, tug at my hands so you can lace your finger in mine. That tender caress right before a kiss.

I’d surely not survive if ever you were to want me in that way. I could never say no and forever be at your mercy and tied to your grace. I’d give you all I had because I know you deserve it and more, for all you are and all you do and how you affect those around you. And all I’d hope, I say in a quite whisper, is that you kiss me softly; leave some breath in me as you run your fingers a long the back of my hair. 

I don’t think I could make you happy for forever, but I’d try hard to do so as long as you have me. As long as you want me. 

How I wonder if you’d want me. 

[dated 19 Jul 2021]

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YOU KNOW IT’S TIME’S LIKE THESE WE’RE SO MUCH HAPPIER 🎸🎸🎹 NIGHTS LIKE THESE WE’LL REMEMBER THOSE STUPID JOKES 🎹🎸🎸

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wip! dedicated to @bitnotgood28

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“Dog that’s in love with this commercial.”

(via)

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art for tumblr!

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art for tumblr 😋

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With the news of Queen Elizabeth’s hospitalisation, it’s now a distinct reality that we could be looking at a change in monarch. And while everyone loves being performative and wants to look cool and join in on the ‘fun’ of celebrating her death, maybe instead you should be looking at doing something that might actually make a difference.

Queen Elizabeth II was an incredibly popular monarch. She was clever and cunning and played her apolitical political role well, taking care to remain in the good graces of the public. It is NOT a coincidence that while monarchies all around Europe toppled, Britain never once seriously looked at getting rid of their Queen.

This is not true of Charles. He is not as well liked. He does not have the benefit of longevity - most people alive have known the Queen as their monarch their whole lives, and have never seen the monarch change. Kicking a little old lady off the throne after what many people have seen as years of service to her country was a relatively unpopular proposition, but the same is not true of of a man who people aren’t all that fond of, and who doesn’t hold the position.

If you’re on tumblr you’re probably very aware of the questionable past and present of the British throne - and if you’re British or a member of a commonwealth state, now is the time to start talking about it. The monarchy is never going to be overthrown while Queen Elizabeth is still alive, but on her death… well, it’s pretty much fair game.

So instead of just celebrating on your blog, go out and talk about the monarchy. Sow seeds of revolution. Talk about the racism of the royal family. Talk about the racism inherent in the system, and the very personal racism that Megan Markle exposed. Talk about how it isn’t fair that in a unilateral society based on principles of equality, we have not just a monarch but an entire class of people who are born into titles. Talk about how the royal family hoard wealth, how their modern wealth has come from their past subjects, as well as the burden on tax payers. Talk about how unfit they each are for their positions. How you don’t like Charles, or don’t want him as king. Talk about how outsiders are treated - Megan, Diana.

Talk about all the downsides of the monarchy, and do it loudly and publicly, especially with people who are on the fence or who don’t think they care. We will only step away from the monarchy when the general public demand it, and for that to happens, people need to be informed. People need to consider what things would be like without the institution they’ve lived with all their lives- and if the figurehead of that institution is changing, now is the perfect time.

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Franz Kafka, Letters to Milena

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Louis for 1883 Magazine, photographed by Jack Alexander

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me completely by myself in my room: alright everybody just calm down

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“I’m not too gone to be / healed, am I? / I’m not too gone / am I?”

— Alice Notley, from In the Pines

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This could save lives so I thought I’d share!

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RIVER PAINTINGS II Hungary-based photographer Gabor Nagy shares the second instalment of River Paintings, an ongoing series of aerial photos of Iceland's rivers.

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i’m not sure i’m capable of being loved right now / i feel safe in my quiet way of living and telling my secrets to thread & paper / i don’t know what i’d say if you asked me to know myself / more

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That Big Mood when you’re sleepy and tired all day but as soon as the clock strikes midnight you want to draw and paint and steal the mona lisa and do some cart wheels

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Louis, sketch