black-lake - Tumblr blog

[black-lake]

“As I look back on my life, I realize that every time I thought I was being rejected from something good, I was actually being re-directed to something better.”

— Steve Maraboli

[black-lake]

[black-lake]

“Healing is layers. Healing is time. Healing is excruciating. Once you think it’s done, it’s not.”

— Mary DeMuth

[black-lake]

[black-lake]

“I’ve always done whatever I felt like doing in life. People may try to stop me, and convince me I’m wrong, but I won’t change.”

— Haruki Murakami, What I Talk About When I Talk About Running

[black-lake]

that comment about how you should not borrow grief from the future has saved me multiple times from spiraling into an inescapable state of anxiety. like every time i find myself thinking about how something in the future could go wrong i remember that comment and i think to myself: well i never know, it might get better. it might not even happen the way i think it will and if it does happen and it is sad and bad ill be sad about it then, when it happens. and it’s somehow soo freeing

[black-lake]

“Some people have been hurt in their past. So don’t just tell them you love them, show them why they should believe.”

— Charles Orlando

[black-lake]

Not both mars and saturn sitting on my sun right after the aries solar eclipse. Most of my inner planets are in aries and my sun in pisces. I really can’t put into words what I’ve been feeling this month.. but it’s a lot. It’s like a constant rapid shift in energies with no break.

I’ve been feeling this internal rage since yesterday and I’m asking myself why, then I found out about the mars-saturn conjunction. But what’s interesting is that the energy of mars and saturn in pisces is something I can easily direct. It’s easier to feel and channel. It’s just giving me ideas that I can’t act on. It’s nothing like my natal mars opposite saturn which is one of the most challenging aspects to deal with in my chart.

[black-lake]

What broke my heart cleared my vision

[black-lake]

Many people die at twenty-five but aren't buried until their seventy-five.

Benjamin Franklin

[black-lake]

⚜️🤎⚜️Golden Wings Icarus⚜️🤎⚜️

[black-lake]

what a mix of energy I’m feeling this solar eclipse. It’s like the air is clearing and things are being broken down. I’m grieving some parts of myself I lost but feeling other parts of me returning and emerging

[black-lake]

Yes, death. Death must be so beautiful. To lie in the soft brown earth, with the grasses waving above one's head, and listen to silence. To have no yesterday, and no to-morrow. To forget time, to forget life, to be at peace. You can help me. You can open for me the portals of death's house, for love is always with you, and love is stronger than death is.

Oscar Wilde, The Canterville Ghost (1887)

[black-lake]

my mac fell and broke I feel terrible

[black-lake]

I had this feeling suddenly. I get this feeling a lot, but I don’t know if there’s one word for it. It’s not nervous or sad or even lonely. It’s all of that, and then a bit more. The feeling is I don’t belong here. I don’t know how I got here, and I don’t know how long I can stay before everyone else realizes that I am an impostor. I am a fraud. I’ve gotten this feeling nearly everywhere I have ever been in my life. There’s nothing you can do about it except drink some water and hope that it subsides. Or you can leave.

I’m lonely. What kind of loneliness? Every kind. I feel disconnected. Abandoned. As always. Repetition. So what, my love? So what? At first, I just wanted to run away. Now I have no where else to run to, nothing to run from. I don’t belong anywhere, I don’t want to go anywhere, I just want to be happy.

(1) Czeslaw Milosz, New and Collected Poems: 1931-2001 (2) Leila Sales, This Song Will Save Your Life (3) Daniela Fischerová, Fingers Pointing Somewhere Else (4) Wisława Szymborska, tr. by Clare Cavanagh and Stanisław Barańczak, from “The Railroad Station”, Map: Collected and Last Poems (5) Daul Kim (6) Sarah Kay, from “The Paradox”, No Matter the Wreckage

[black-lake]

When its finally your turn,

I hope you understand why the wait was necessary.

-@lipikkawrites

[black-lake]

— Lord Byron, from “To the Countess of Blessington.”