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[coldandguiltyandthin]

my favorite emo/scene thinspo part two 🕸

[coldandguiltyandthin]

This is serious. They are calling us violent when all we do is speak. They call us violent while they ruin our bodies and dont think twice.

I had 3 periods in one month after being tear gassed.

My friend who was protesting regularly, and being exposed to tear gas, had a cyst the size of an orange form on her uterus.

My other friend had her period for a straight month after being tear gassed.

There isn’t enough research right now that examines the long term effects of tear gas on people with uteruses. Who knows what could happen to us.

This is America.

[coldandguiltyandthin]

Do you think this is a pretty sight? This is the reality of having anorexia for 12+ years. The reality of what eating disorders can do to your body.

When I was in high school and then in college getting my bachelors degree, I spent more time in hospitals and treatment centers than I did out of them.

And then I found out

My organs failed. Permanently.

Last year, I needed major surgery that took about 4 HOURS, and after that I was admitted to the hospital for a week on heavy pain medications, being wheeled around because I couldn’t walk.

I had tubes everywhere.

I had to medically withdraw from graduate school because I had to spend that time in doctors offices, infusion centers for IVs, in the ER, or admitted into the hospital.

Now I have a 6 inch scar across my abdomen and will be on medications for the rest of my life to help my heart and stomach function enough to keep me alive.

I’ve nearly died multiple times from the ED, but I had never believed that my organs could shut down and leave me to deal with that reality for the rest of my life.

That is not a way anyone should have to live life.

This is what an eating disorder looks like. Not the “thinspo” everyone sees on the Internet. This is what you don’t see behind those pictures and it’s not pretty.

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I feel like I have to say this because it’s such an important thing especially in the Ed community. Those ana coaches that message you and ask you for your weight and pics and want to be you coach are pedos. Most of them are grown adults who get off on eating disorders. NEVER send them any pics of you wether you’re fully clothed or not don’t do it. They prey of people who are vulnerable and ill. They look for people who are desperate to lose weight and take advantage of it. If you want to know about this stuff I’d recommend watching a youtuber called Of Herbs and Altars. They have a video about those creepy anorexia forums and that. There are more videos about this topic on YouTube as well. Don’t trust them please they are only contacting you because they are creeps.

[coldandguiltyandthin]

Please make this go viral.

It is so important I don’t even care if you delete what I write here, just help it be seen. 

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[coldandguiltyandthin]

My mom screaming at me everyday for three weeks bc its the end of sem and me.eating lunch is PRoCraStInaTing

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Just some random ed facts since I'm making questionable google searches rn

Eating disorders are among the deadliest mental illnesses, second only to opioid overdose.

28-74% of risk for eating disorders is through genetic heritability.

Less than 6% of people with eating disorders are medically diagnosed as “underweight.��

20-30% of adults with eating disorders also have autism.

Anorexia has an estimated mortality rate of around 10 percent.

A study by the National Association of Anorexia Nervosa and Associated Disorders reported that 5 – 10% of anorexics die within 10 years after contracting the disease; 18-20% of anorexics will be dead after 20 years and only 30 – 40% ever fully recover.

Only 1 in 10 people with eating disorders receive treatment.

Treatment of an eating disorder in the US ranges from $500 per day to $2,000 per day. The average cost for a month of inpatient treatment is $30,000. It is estimated that individuals with eating disorders need anywhere from 3 – 6 months of inpatient care. Health insurance companies for several reasons do not typically cover the cost of treating eating disorders.

The cost of outpatient treatment, including therapy and medical monitoring, can extend to $100,000 or more.

All I have to say is yikes😬

[coldandguiltyandthin]

🖤 ~ ❤ ~ 💜 ~ 💙 ~ 💚 ~ 💛

reblog to break that plateau and lose some weight! i believe in you!

💛 ~ 💚 ~ 💙 ~ 💜 ~ ❤ ~ 🖤

[coldandguiltyandthin]

💫❤️ reblog to wake up thinner

[coldandguiltyandthin]

At this point i'd be happy to just hit like.. 160 pounds..i've gained sm weight in the past week..im currently at 166.6 which is cool ig but..what if i like..lost 6.6 of those?? I look at old pics from 2019 when i was 130-135 pounds and my arms where so long and my wristbones were SO obvious. And now i cant even- like,, hngh

[coldandguiltyandthin]

Food diary 12/17/20 : Goal >800

Breakfast

Egg bites (made one batch with yolk and one with whites)

-5 whites (85cal)

-5 yolks (275cal)

-2 slices honey ham lunch meat (60 per slice)

-1 slices colby jack deli cheese (80cal)

Baked at 350°F

White makes 12 mini egg muffins, yolk makes 9 mini muffins.

Whites: 185 cal total, 15.5cals each

Yolks: 375 cal total, 31.25 each

Trenta cup filled with diet 5 juice (19.3cals)

Total: 175cals

Lunch

3 slices deli meat (180cals)

Rice cake (30cal)

1 stick mint gum and chai tea w/o milk (1cal)

211cals

Dinner

Microwave Lasagna (410cals)

Total: 410cals

Daily intake: 796 calories.

[coldandguiltyandthin]

This virus is not a joke. Dont you dare compare it to the flu either.

I want to prove a point to a coworker of mine.

Pretend this post is the coronavirus.

If you see this on your dash, just reblog it.

Let’s show them how quickly this virus can spread from just one person.

[coldandguiltyandthin]

All i've done is gain back the weight i just lost. Wtf. I was only like 3 and a half kgs from my second goal weight and now im back at almost my starting weight

[coldandguiltyandthin]

Oh to have dainty arms enveloped by thin silk and velvet

[coldandguiltyandthin]

Does anyone else go thru weird one or two day recovery (???) Periods where you luv urself and dont care abt ur weight or how many cals you eat bc same- and it makes me feel like im faking it?? Idk 😔

[coldandguiltyandthin]

I’m 99 pounds again fuckers 🎉

Rb for good luck loosing any regained weight