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cor0t · 8 days
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me, as i force a dollar bill into the self-checkout machine: thats right…..good boy……vore president washington
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cor0t · 13 days
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Ok what everyone in the notes isn't getting here is that she's probably using this as an attack against trump because a bunch of people in his own party like her better like how are we this divorced from context
Like I get how the democratic party loves to pander to rightoids who Will Not Vote for them but I mean. Come on. Did you not watch the debate
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truly fucked how much she's leaning into this. yeah we get it girl you're an early-2000s republican… welcome back bush administration
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cor0t · 26 days
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I can't get over how idiotic musk's plan was for this whole Brazil situation. Like it literally went like this.
Brazil: Your rampant unfiltered hate speech and misinformation on your platform is in violation of the law, you need to do something about it.
musk: I'll just close all our offices in Brazil, now that there's no staff in the country you can't charge us.
Brazil: You need to have a representative operating in the country otherwise you can't do business here. Consult with us in 24 hours or your site will be blocked.
musk: ha look here's an ai generated image of toilet paper with the name of your supreme court judge on it (he actually did this)
Twitter is blocked in Brazil after musk failed to consult with them and appoint a representative.
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cor0t · 26 days
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cor0t · 1 month
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How am I fucking seeing this shit in 2024
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cor0t · 1 month
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cor0t · 1 month
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hindsight
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[ID: A two-panel comic with crudely drawn stick figures.
Panel 1: The lime green person is talking to the leaf green person and the moss green person.
Lime: "I... have a confession to make."
Leaf: "Go ahead."
Lime: "I want to rewatch the Wizard Child movies."
Leaf: "Didn't the wizard author get incredibly chromophobic?"
Lime: "Yeah I just... It's nostalgia you know? They meant a lot to me when I was a kid."
Panel 2: The three are on the couch.
Lime: "All right, let's go."
Leaf: "It's so weird how the wizard author just turned chromophobic though. Like I remember this series being pretty good for its time. It'll be weird seeing their work contrasting with their views now."
Moss: "I'm just glad we got the movies for free through normal and legal means. Heh."
End ID.]
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[ID 2: Scenes from three Wizard Child movies.
Wizard Child and the Simplistic Morality: A slightly round child with a propeller hat is talking to a child with no hat.
Round child: "I am so fucking fat and greedy I am textually shown to be fat because I am greedy and also evil."
Hatless child: "You are to infer my moral purity from juxtaposition with this fat child. Woe is me for our shared parent has deprived me of a propeller hat."
Wizard Child and the Goodness of Wealth: An adult wizard is talking to the child, who now has a wizard hat.
Wizard Adult: "Wizard child you are secretly extremely rich."
Wizard Child: "I will form biases regarding the bankers all being triangular for some reason!"
Wizard Adult: "Your wealth is deserved because your true parent was Good and therefore you are also Good."
Wizard Child: "Now we should acquire consumer goods. Buy consumer goods!"
Wizard Child and the Dark Family History: A blue-grey horse person is talking to the wizard child.
Blue-grey: "No, wizard child. You don't understand. I am one of the good ones, because unlike the bad ones I don't try to spread my curse that makes you a blue-grey horselike creature to others!"
Wizard child: "Wow uncle blue-grey you are one of the good ones! I forgive you for being a horse because I am so good I would even forgive horses. I sure hope you don't conspicuously get killed off later in this movie!"
End ID 2.]
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[ID 3: Oh hell no there are even more of these.
Wizard Youth and the Tokenistic Relationship Dynamics: A square headed wizard youth is talking to the former wizard child, now a wizard youth.
Square Wizard Youth: "Wizard child, as the only person with a square head in this entire series it is my duty to inform you that you are the savior of all people with square heads, too. Let us build a one-sided relationship that only furthers your character development, after which I will immediately lose all plot relevance."
Wizard Youth: "I will do this because I am a maturing wizard youth and need disposable relationships that don't threaten the endgame!"
Wizard Youth and the Escalation of Stakes: The Dark Wizard, a sort of grey-green person with a cloak, is pointing at Wizard Youth.
Dark Wizard: "Wizard Youth, I have returned!"
Wizard Youth: "Dark Wizard! Why are you green now?"
Dark Wizard: "Evil magic made me green! I am green with envy towards all who are good!"
Wizard Youth: "I will not engage with how you are clearly based on fascist ideologies and yet this narrative plays into fascist aesthetic sensibilities!"
Wizard Youth and the Post-Hoc Revelations: The Wizard Youth is leaning over their Wizard Mentor, who is laying in a pool of blood.
Wizard Youth: "Wizard Mentor no! You can't die!"
Wizard Mentor: "It is fine, wizard youth. My death will further your character development into a wizard adult. Also, I was secretly a very very dark purple this entire time. I never brought it up so I could retain narrative approval.
End ID 3.]
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[ID 4: Wizard Adult and the Overdue Conclusion. Three panels. I am sorry.
Panel 1: The dark wizard is dueling the Wizard Adult with magic beams.
Dark Wizard: "Evil green beam!"
Wizard Adult: "Good red beam! Despite the enormous variety of magic in this series this is what our final battle looks like!"
Panel 2: Wizard Adult stands victorious over the dark wizard, who is dying on the ground.
Wizard Adult: "In the end, dark wizard, you were defeated because I am morally superior to you."
Dark Wizard: "I was a product of systemic failures. There will be someone like me again someday!"
Panel 3: Zoom in on wizard adult, who says:
"Not if I can help it. Because I am going to be a wizard cop now. The moral of this story is that all systemic issues can be solved by finding a bad guy to beat."
End ID 4.]
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[ID 5: Four panels.
Panel 1: Return to the green trio on their couch, watching the TV say "The End." All are are silent.
Panel 2: They are sitting on the couch. Moss is looking at their phone.
Lime: "Yeah so there were maybe a few signs we missed because we were children."
Leaf: "Yeah. A few. Some."
Panel 3: Continue conversation.
Lime: "So what did you think, Moss?"
Panel 4: Zoom in on Moss, who says: "I've been zoned out on my phone since the second movie. They lost me at the magic stuff. Wizards aren't real."
End ID 5.]
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cor0t · 1 month
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cor0t · 1 month
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something genuinely insane about going somewhere and getting to feel “i had some of the worst years of my life here” and “i was loved here, once” simultaneously.
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cor0t · 2 months
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was reminded of that youtube channel that records footage of that bridge that scalps trucks today. one of the fascinating developments that's happened since i last heard about it is that, in one of their many attempts to stop the trucks from being can-opened, they installed a traffic light that detects when a vehicle that's over the allowed height is coming and turns red so the driver can stop and hopefully notice the signage all around that's screaming "YOUR VEHICLE IS OVERHEIGHT TURN AROUND" and avoid an accident. However as a result sometimes drivers see the light turning yellow and IMMEDIATELY start flooring it to avoid having to stop, ensuring that the roof of their truck just gets fucking annihilated instantly. Really beautiful stuff you should check it out
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cor0t · 2 months
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cor0t · 2 months
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craziest thing about gaining significant weight is that people in your life will comment on it totally uninvited & they say they’re just a little concerned for your health
but they’re like, the same people who went partying with you every weekend ages 19-21 & apparently the binge drinking & no sleep & doing lines in bathrooms with strangers or whatever weren’t health concerns bc you were thin 😍
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cor0t · 2 months
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I rewatched Hercules with my mom a few days ago
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cor0t · 2 months
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Best tweet of the day, bring back funny drawings instead of pictures
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cor0t · 2 months
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cor0t · 2 months
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you have been SNIFED, reblog to snif the next person
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cor0t · 2 months
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I find it personally offensive how many bad writers can get published so easily.
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