czytling

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the fact that subtitles and audio description for Deaf and Blind people respectfully are not standard practice for most forms of audio visual media is honestly a disgrace. like wdym you have millions of money for your film and you don't just automatically make an accessible version?

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The Muppets as Goncharov (1973)

the only goncharov remake I want is a muppets version

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an incomplete list of times a bat has yelled for superman’s help

- six years after they met, batman called for superman’s help for the first time, when he realized he couldn’t save a child from a fire

- dick grayson, age 8, called for superman to save batman from a death trap

- dick grayson, age 9, called superman to open a jam jar (strawberry)

- alfred, age lots, called superman to save batman from a death trap

- dick grayson, age 11, called superman to open a jam jar (grape)

- bruce wayne called superman to comfort dick grayson, who had just been fired as robin

- ace the bathound barked for superman to save batman from a death trap

- bruce wayne called superman to ask why, precisely, dick grayson was now superhero-ing under a kryptonian name

- jason todd called superman to save batman from a death trap

- batman called superman to save jason todd from a death trap. superman was in a different solar system.  he didn’t hear his name.

- barbara gordon called superman to help subdue supergirl, who was mind-controlled at the time

- dick grayson, age 19, called superman to open a jam jar (raspberry)

- tim drake called superman to save batman from a death trap

- stephanie brown called superman to see if she could

- tim drake called superman to tell superboy to take his earbuds out

- batman called superman because the batplane had just exploded at 17,000 feet, and he can’t fly, at all

- jason todd called superman to save batman from a death trap that he had himself set up

- dick grayson, age 24, called superman to open a jam jar (fig)

- dick grayson called superman to ask him why he hadn’t saved his father

- damian wayne called superman to save batman (dick grayson) from a death trap

- cassandra cain called superman so he could interpret her signs for a particularly skeevy alleyway ruffian.  he refused to interpret some of the signs.

- batman called superman to tell him to get lois some damn flowers already so she would stop texting him

- a failsafe device made by barbara gordon and tim drake automatically called superman to save batman from a death trap

- duke thomas called superman because he was dared to and he didn’t think it would work (it did)

- dick grayson, age 26, called superman to open a jam jar (apricot)

- damian wayne called superman to tell superboy (jon kent) to take his earbuds out

- selina kyle called superman to save a kitten from a tree

- dick grayson, age 28, called superman to save batman from a jam jar (giant, acid-filled)

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Reblog this if you had to learn cursive writing as a child

If you were ever told or were made to learn cursive writing when you were in grade school. I wanna see how many of you suffered like I did.

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CAPTAIN AMERICA: THE FIRST AVENGER (2011) — dir. Joe Johnston.

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on watching a parent age

i saw somebody say “what if you’re gone and i haven’t become anything yet” and basically that broke me on a random thursday evening

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I love how most of us ace people have at least one exception in a fictional character we absolutely get enamored by that makes you question if you're actually ace but then the feelings just don't ever happen again and you're like "oh, nvm it's just that one little fucker that has me going feral"

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Alfred finds out about the spreadsheet not through Bruce—heaven forbid—or even Master Richard, who has, historically, been the canary in the Batcave coal mine.

No, Alfred finds out because Wonder Woman calls him.

“Is it true Damian purchased a warhorse on patrol?” she asks, warm but curious. “The line item says, ‘Live horse, unauthorized—refused to name it anything but “Vengeance.”’”

Alfred exhales. Deeply. The kettle screams in the background.

“That depends, Your Highness,” he says, “on your definition of purchased.”

—

By the time Alfred reviews the spreadsheet himself, it’s clear to him that Bruce has, once again, attempted to manage grief, children, and domestic infrastructure by applying the principles of a Fortune 500 CEO to a family that was never supposed to exist.

Line items include:

• “Cass: ballet shoe fund (annual),” next to “Cass: glider fuel fund (quarterly).”

• “Duke: emergency stipend for spontaneous dramatic lighting needs.”

• “Dick: trapeze rigging expenses (do not let him do it indoors again).”

• “Tim: coffee. No questions.”

• “Jason: reparations to the Gotham Historical Society. Again.”

There is an entire tab titled “Kryptonian Damage Control (Clark-Specific),” with columns like:

• “Reinforced cutlery (snapped during brunch).”

• “Ceiling repairs (emotional egress).”

• “Sofa replacements (unconfirmed eye-laser mishap?).”

And yet, tucked between “ventilation system repairs” and “cape replenishment inventory,” there is a quiet, unformatted cell with a single note:

“Alfred - annual birthday fund (nonnegotiable).”

He stares at it for a long time.

Then he closes the spreadsheet. Updates his will. Makes Bruce’s favorite tea.

And orders six more bulletproof teapots.

Because in this household, love is measured in line items—and survived in spreadsheets.

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dick: [swaps tim for a younger, more violent little brother] tim: oh ok i see how it is. [swaps dick for a younger, more violent big brother]

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conversations overheard through the batkid com lines pt 1

Jason: yeah me and B are on ok terms now,

Dick: oh you guys are getting along-?

Jason: well we’re doing ok, I’m not mad at him anymore.

Dick: thought you wanted him to kill the Joker?

Jason: i did, but then like last week i went to the manor and i saw him smash the coffee machine with a hammer because it didn’t fill his mug enough; and i just don’t think he’d be a good killer.

Dick: *light wheeze* because he broke the coffee machine?

Jason: well it was just- *cracked grin* he gets- he gets angry, you know? and he’s not good at self control? like that machine did nothing and he just destroyed it. and i was just thinking about how, like, he decided that adopting kids was an acceptable thing to do, and now he has like eleven of us,

Dick: *silent cackles*

Jason: like he can’t see a kid without thinking ‘wonder if i can draft this one’. i think if we managed to convince him killing was ok it wouldn’t go well. he’d just keep doing it.

Dick: *through laughter* because of no self control?

Jason: yeah, like once he crosses that line he’d probably step over it at any minor inconvenience. he gets addicted and he gets mad at a lot of things.

Dick: so B shouldn’t kill?

Jason: no.

Dick: but you can?

Jason: well i- *wheeze* i have practice honing the rage, i don’t kill for stupid reasons. *pause* apart from that one time.

Dick, audibly amused: what time?

Jason: i sneezed and accidentially pressed the trigger.

Dick: *loud cackles*

Jason: i felt bad, man, like his cat was there-

Dick: *falls off his chair*

Jason: how are you this apathetic.

Dick: is that where Damian’s new cat came from?

Jason: it’s not like i could just leave it there!

Dick: i thought i saw trauma in it’s eyes. it had that wartime stare.

Jason: the blood spattered right across its fur. i had to bathe it.

Dick: Damian thinks it has anxiety

Jason: anxiet- dude it has more than anxiety, it has fucking PTSD-

Dick: *wheezes harder*

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Sam: I don't want Steve to die Sam: You don't want Steve to die Sam: So now we need to make sure that Steve doesn't make Steve die Bucky: Fantastic plan, but have you fucking met him?

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One should always have at least 2 craft projects going. That way, when one of them is messed up and misbehaving, you can switch to another, and let the first one sit there and think about what it's done.

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The best part about being asexual is knowing that you will never be honeypotted. I often picture myself as a mark in a James Bond movie who has information or something and Daniel Craig saunters up in his sexiest tux to seduce me and I’m just like “No thank you” no matter what he does and then he has an existential crisis and walks away in a daze then sends in Moneypenny cause maybe I just like women and I’m like “hey girl, no thanks” and send her away as well and they just never get the information. I am an immovable plot piece without even knowing it. Sorry James but I defy the tropes of your genre.

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EDIT: This meme is not about aroace people who are sex/date favorable. It's about the people who are constantly using "aroace can still date/have sex" to erase the representation of aroaces that don't feel that way. I don't believe romance/sex repulsed aroaces are better or "superior" to those who are.