deathbydibs - Tumblr blog

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dick grayson is at once an only child (of his parents and bruce), an eldest child (of the batkids), and the youngest child (him and bruce)

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A Vulcan named Stork works at the Terran adoption agency. Parents always request that he be the one to deliver their child to them.

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Love how tumblr has its own folk stories. Yeah the God of Arepo we’ve all heard the story and we all still cry about it. Yeah that one about the woman locked up for centuries finally getting free. That one about the witch who would marry anyone who could get her house key from her cat and it’s revealed she IS the cat after the narrator befriends the cat.

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occasional posts from users

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remember in School of Rock where the black girl was afraid to say she wanted to be a singer because she was fat and didn’t want to get laughed at but Dewey was all “who gives a shit, I’m fat too and so is aretha franklin but we’re still valuable and we rock” and then the girl felt better without having to be told that beauty comes in all sizes or some other bullshit. thats the kind of body positivity I’m looking for. tell these babies that they’re worth a damn without tying it to any other arbitrary ideals

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Little Jason tries really-really-really hard to not disappoint Bruce, but he doesn't know that Bruce standards after Dick look like:

Nor chewing on the plaster (please)

Don't bark on stray dogs (if possible)

Don't set the mansion on fire (optional)

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The thing about Timmy Chalamet is that he’s truly a great actor and he even has good taste in projects and he’s not even overexposed when you calibrate for how overexposed all that group of 25-30 year old big stars are……however something is still off. any time he gets cast in something it feels like that movie instantly turns into a parody of a movie. I cannot explain this

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Au where Batman’s rogues can tell that someone else is acting as Batman (but not who it is) so they all slump in relief because they can finally reuse old schemes. They don’t have to come up with a new plan for the 30th time this year!

That is until Batman (dick who was very much there as Robin for all these schemes) starts cracking down on them in a 1/4 of the time it should have taken to catch them.

The riddler sets up a glorified treasure hunt? Dick gives the final answer before even looking at the first clue. Two face stages a mock trial? Dick dodges all the rope traps and cuts the “accused free” after cuffing the “judge” who was the actual guilty one.

They are all terribly miffed and try tripping him up…only he was there when they tried to do that to Bruce too.

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“I don’t care about dumb weed jokes,” I said naively, before I saw this

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The best cover for Bruce Wayne would be dumb carefree playboy who is also Instagram Optimistic, everyday he’s posting a selfie of his smiling at his breakfast with a caption like “it’s a waffle day! #goodvibesingotham #grateful” or a picture of a sunrise with a caption that’s just “wow #blessed” 

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The robins’ arrested development is fascinating to me on a meta level.

The first child sidekick of the golden age of comics, never meant to be a man, a child for forty years who fought and demanded the right to grow up.

The second robin is slain in his career’s infancy. An unaging symbol of lost innocence because innocence itself was no longer required. Who burst back out of his grave unwillingly, in a man’s body, dragged into adulthood all at once. A child killed twice over.

The third robin, who was comfortable in his place as a child as a sidekick, evicted because someone else needed that spot, only to be wedged back into the box. Not quite a man, but he can’t go back to being a boy either, stuck in the in between.

And the fifth robin, still a child. Destined to grow into an adult role that will never be vacated, and so cannot grow up.

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HAAANK! THAT'S NOT ART BY THE OP HANK! OP REPOSTED IT WITHOUT CREDIT! HANK!

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Tim is surprised every time Bruce being a dad. Not even a good one, which he is, but genuinely just a dad.

Like, what do you mean, he asks how was your day and carefully listened to your answer instead of interrupt you on the second sentence and talk about himself?

What do you mean, he cares about you every day and not only when he wants to look like a good dad™ at gala?

What do you mean, he tries to understand your interests instead of saying that it's useless and you have to quit?

What do you mean, he carries you to bed instead of waking you up?

What do you mean, he actually remembers things that you told him?

What do you mean, he stays with you, because you are scared and you asked him to?

What do you mean, you don't need to ask?

And for the first time in his life, Tim thinks that it wasn't his fault. He wasn't a bad child. His father was a bad person.

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Justice League identity reveal where they don’t know who Batman is and one day a bunch of them walk in on him just casually eating yogurt in the cafeteria with his cowl off. A bunch of them recognize him, a couple don’t, and they’re all shocked.

Turns out Batman didn’t realize none of them knew who he was, since it had taken him all of ten minutes and three google searches to put everyone’s secret identities together and he just assumed they had all figured it out by this point. Or maybe he had meant to tell them and then just forgotten. Either way, he regularly interacts with half of them outside of hero stuff and hasn’t bothered with the whole separate persona thing with them in years. Shouldn’t they really have figured this out by now? So what if he forgot? This is clearly on them.

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The stomach kick face kick at 1.12 is a thing of beauty.