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diaryoflife · 2 months
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Y/N: Just realized there’s nothing stopping me from drinking a lava lamp.
*Natasha sighs and hits the back of Y/N’s head whilst the team laughs*
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diaryoflife · 4 months
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[The Avengers visiting Wanda, Y/N and their twins]
Wanda, about Y/N: Sometimes I just want to shrink them down and put them in a snow globe and shake it around a lot.
Y/N, excitedly runs back into the room: Can we do that?! That’d be so fun.
*Wanda sighs as the whole team laughs*
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diaryoflife · 4 months
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[During an Avengers team meeting]
Tony: Has anyone ever had an experience with an evil entity following them?
Y/N, about their twins: Yes, but once they're potty trained and a bit more independent, they tend to settle down.
*the team laughs*
Wanda, hits the back of Y/N’s head: Don’t talk about our babies like that!
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diaryoflife · 7 months
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Y/N: I only talk to like five people every day and three of them are me.
*Wanda and Natasha nod whilst the team laughs*
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diaryoflife · 8 months
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[Wanda overhearing Y/N and the baby twins talking whilst they watch tv]
Y/N, to the twins: “Mickey” is a nickname, and nicknames are for friends, and Michael Mouse is no friend of mine.
*Billy and Tommy giggle*
Wanda, rolling her eyes, amused: Y/N.
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diaryoflife · 9 months
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Y/N, talking about Natasha: Dating a tiny woman is cool until you roll down the window on the freeway and she flies out like a mcdonald's napkin..
*Natasha hits the back of Y/N’s head whilst the team laughs*
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diaryoflife · 9 months
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[Y/N, from another planet]
Natasha, looking at Y/N, trying to stay calm: The shopping list said noodles!
Y/N, holding 47 pool noodles: You didn’t say what kind.
*Natasha groans and walks away angrily whilst the team laughs*
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diaryoflife · 10 months
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[Wanda being insecure]
Y/N, to Wanda: Remember the day we met? When I first joined the team? I was walking through the halls and I saw the most beautiful girl and I was like, "Whoa, who is that?" And you were like, "That's Natasha Romanoff.”.
*Wanda slightly glares at Y/N, wondering what their point is whilst the whole team bursts out laughing*
Y/N: And then I turned and saw you for the first time and I was done with Natasha Romanoff.
*Wanda blushes whilst the team laughs*
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diaryoflife · 10 months
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[After a mission]
Y/N, injured: I need surgery, it doesn't matter what kind.
*Natasha hits the back of Y/N’s head whilst the team laughs*
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diaryoflife · 10 months
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Y/N, looking at Wanda intensely: The voices they're telling me to bite you.
*Wanda blushes and rolls her eyes whilst the team laughs*
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diaryoflife · 11 months
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[Wanda married to Y/N, who is from another planet]
Wanda: Where are Billy and Tommy?
Y/N: They’re out.
Wanda, annoyed: But they’re grounded!
Y/N, confused: Are they not allowed out when they’re grounded?
*Wanda sighs*
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diaryoflife · 11 months
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[Tony calling Y/N]
Tony: Y/N where are you? You’ve been gone all day.
Y/N: I waved at Natasha because I thought she waved at me. Apparently she waved at another person. So to get out of the awkward situation I kept my hand up and a taxi pulled over and drove me to the airport. I am now in Poland starting a new life.
*the team laughs whilst Natasha shakes her head with a smile*
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diaryoflife · 11 months
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[A normal morning at the Avengers compound]
Y/N, walking to the dinner table where the whole team is having breakfast: I just kissed a married woman!
Natasha, walking in right after Y/N: That’s because I’m your wife… you can’t keep saying that every time we kiss!
*the team laughs*
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diaryoflife · 11 months
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[The Avengers sitting & talking]
Tony, to Natasha: What would you do if Y/N was laughing and talking with another woman?
Natasha, seriously: I would be like “what the fuck is so funny” and put a bomb in their car.
*Y/N looks at Natasha with wide scared eyes*
Clint, laughing: Y/N would totally innocently do that too! They’re so oblivious to Natasha’s jealousy.
*the team laughs whilst Natasha glares at Clint*
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diaryoflife · 11 months
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[Natasha and Y/N arguing]
Y/N: I’m not afraid of you… with everyone else around.
*the team bursts out laughing*
Natasha, sighs and smiles slightly: You’re an idiot.
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diaryoflife · 11 months
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[the team sitting together]
Bucky: What's the worst lie you were told as a kid?
Y/N Maximoff: My mom would always tell me I was the "easiest physical birth out of all of the kids." I felt proud until at the age of 10 I was told I was adopted.
*Wanda and Pietro laugh until the team can’t hold their laughter in anymore*
Natasha, trying not to laugh: Come on Y/N, don’t be grumpy. Let’s go to our room.
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diaryoflife · 11 months
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1.4k! thank you very much :)
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