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eawol · 6 months
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my favorite part was when he ate the dungeon
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eawol · 6 months
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because sometimes there are invisible tests and invisible rules and you're just supposed to ... know the rule. someone you thought of as a friend asks you for book recommendations, so you give her a list of like 30 books, each with a brief blurb and why you like it. later, you find out she screenshotted the list and send it out to a group chat with the note: what an absolute freak can you believe this. you saw the responses: emojis where people are rolling over laughing. too much and obsessive and actually kind of creepy in the comments. you thought you'd been doing the right thing. she'd asked, right? an invisible rule: this is what happens when you get too excited.
you aren't supposed to laugh at your own jokes, so you don't, but then you're too serious. you're not supposed to be too loud, but then people say you're too quiet. you aren't supposed to get passionate about things, but then you're shy, boring. you aren't supposed to talk too much, but then people are mad when you're not good at replying.
you fold yourself into a prettier paper crane. since you never know what is "selfish" and what is "charity," you give yourself over, fully. you'd rather be empty and over-generous - you'd rather eat your own boundaries than have even one person believe that you're mean. since you don't know what the thing is that will make them hate you, you simply scrub yourself clean of any form of roughness. if you are perfect and smiling and funny, they can love you. if you are always there for them and never admit what's happening and never mention your past and never make them uncomfortable - you can make up for it. you can earn it.
don't fuck up. they're all testing you, always. they're tolerating you. whatever secret club happened, over a summer somewhere - during some activity you didn't get to attend - everyone else just... figured it out. like they got some kind of award or examination that allowed them to know how-to-be-normal. how to fit. and for the rest of your life, you've been playing catch-up. you've been trying to prove that - haha! you get it! that the joke they're telling, the people they are, the manual they got- yeah, you've totally read it.
if you can just divide yourself in two - the lovable one, and the one that is you - you can do this. you can walk the line. they can laugh and accept you. if you are always-balanced, never burdensome, a delight to have in class, champagne and glittering and never gawky or florescent or god-forbid cringe: you can get away with it.
you stare at your therapist, whom you can make jokes with, and who laughs at your jokes, because you are so fucking good at people-pleasing. you smile at her, and she asks you how you're doing, and you automatically say i'm good, thanks, how are you? while the answer swims somewhere in your little lizard brain:
how long have you been doing this now? mastering the art of your body and mind like you're piloting a puppet. has it worked? what do you mean that all you feel is... just exhausted. pick yourself up, the tightrope has no net. after all, you're cheating, somehow, but nobody seems to know you actually flunked the test. it's working!
aren't you happy yet?
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eawol · 9 months
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realtalk but when i see dudes on steam or ppl on tumblr talking about how disco elysium made them feel pathetic and uncomfortable i just. i don’t know. i cannot relate to that at all. disco elysium is about an alcoholic amnesiac poet in love with a dying city who loves him back. if i had never been an alcoholic, if i had never been suicidally depressed, maybe i would think the world of disco elysium is a bleak one. but when you know what it’s like to go through that darkness and come out of it again? to fall back in love with a world that almost destroyed you? disco elysium is the most hopeful story imaginable. it sees the world for what it is and holds nothing back, none of the horror, none of the wonder, none of the love…
something about art comforting the disturbed and disturbing the comfortable i dunno
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eawol · 9 months
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disco elysium from cuno's perspective
SAVOIR FAIRE [Easy: Success] - You throw a rock at the corpse.
SAVOIR FAIRE [Easy: Success] - You throw a rock at the corpse.
SAVOIR FAIRE [Easy: Success] - You throw a rock at the corpse.
SAVOIR FAIRE [Easy: Success] - You throw a rock at the corpse.
SAVOIR FAIRE [Easy: Su
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eawol · 1 year
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I'd fucking retire dude are you kidding me
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eawol · 1 year
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I think the Jedi council should have at least considered sending obi-wan over to Dooku to be like “yes hello I am here for sith training” just to see what would happen
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eawol · 1 year
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"no trespassing" "restricted area" "private property" bro im literally curious by nature
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eawol · 1 year
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eawol · 1 year
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the way splatoon showed us that halftime report like "oh wow the margins are so small haha! what a nice and balanced splatfest :)" only to fucking obliterate us with the overall results. genuinely so vile
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eawol · 1 year
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Man what’s the point of playing splatfest anymore if I know I don’t have a chance at winning
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eawol · 1 year
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inflation is real.
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eawol · 1 year
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What we need to do is convince all the disney adults in america that high speed rail would be a preferable way of getting to disneyworld compared to driving or flying. We could maybe harness their fondness for the monorail or something, but this is a group of people that has time, income, and passion that we could leverage. If we could direct 5% of the enthusiasm they have for limited edition popcorn buckets into calling their representatives and demanding high-speed interstate rail, we could get it by 2030
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eawol · 1 year
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If bat mans parents died…. how was he born?
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eawol · 1 year
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The saga of “Link eating things he shouldn’t” continues!
[If you enjoy my work and would like to support me, please consider donating via my Ko-fi!]
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eawol · 1 year
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"supreme court and twitter rate limit means there will be a revolution" y'all cant even boycott chik fil a
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eawol · 1 year
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⚠️ ROAD WORK AHEAD ⚠️
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________________ SPEEDING FINES DOUBLED WHEN WORKERS PRESENT —————————
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⚠️ ROAD WORK 500FT ⚠️
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🚧🚧🚧🚧🚧🚧🚧🚧🚧🚧🚧
        🚚 🚚                  🔩             웃  🧰   🕳️   🪚웃       웃📋     웃    웃 🛠️       🔨웃               🏗️  🕳️                 웃   웃 🔧                                                     🚚 🔩      🔩                      🔩                             
🚧🚧🚧🚧🚧🚧🚧🚧🚧🚧🚧
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⚠️ END ROAD WORK ⚠️
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eawol · 1 year
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