ecandjamesvpjournal - Tumblr blog

[ecandjamesvpjournal]

No, I'm not a "retrotech hoarder", I'm a dragon who prefers floppy disks and CRTs over gold. Get it right

[ecandjamesvpjournal]

[ecandjamesvpjournal]

Bruh

[ecandjamesvpjournal]

tiktok is such an awful app, it's almost designed to feed you misinformation and expose you to insane discourse. unlike beloved tumblr, the app that feeds me misinformation and exposes me to insane discourse

[ecandjamesvpjournal]

[ecandjamesvpjournal]

Your are your normal, boring self. Today, however, you’ve been abducted by the government to interrogate a super villain from another dimension - Yourself!

[ecandjamesvpjournal]

[ecandjamesvpjournal]

Hi! I’m Amara of the Moon and Stars (or just Amara), and I’m fae on my mom’s side. My singing voice has always had some…unwanted affects on normals, but I really like singing and some friends of mine want to start a band. Do you have any abtech that might help like filter stuff out (and maybe some band name suggestions)? Thanks ☺️

Oh, totally. You’re going to want to send an official request to our AbTech Division, ask for a CSR-016/B form, the Cognitohazard Scrambler Request Form, Type B: Vocals. You’ll need to send a file of your voice (don’t worry, we have internal systems for that) so we can dial in the scrambler algorithms, but in seven to eight business weeks we’ll send you back a standard Personalized Scrambler Script Algorithm Sequence - plug that into your favorite voice processing software’s extranormal plugin and you’re good to go.

For those who don’t know, since the 90’s we’ve employed cognitohazard scramblers in most public communications platforms like radio or TV that catch and ‘scramble’ underlying cognitohazardous elements that make it to the airwaves. That’s fine for most low level coghaz stuff, but something like this requires a personalized algorithm.

As for band names, oh boy. Hmm. I’ve mentioned that my favorite band is Heaven Sent, an angel trio from the 70’s. Depending on the type of music, try “Cold Iron.”

[ecandjamesvpjournal]

neighbors smokin shit again. multicolor sparkly smoke. are yo guys gonna come down or do i put another round of buckshot through the wall?

Please do not do that. We -- wait, ANOTHER?

Look buddy, I get annoyed at wizards just the same as any mun mun mun mundane human, but if everyone shot at a wizard every time they did something obnoxious there'd be no wizards left. No offense, wizards.

Multicolor sparkly smoke...they might be, uh. Partaking in what we used to call hexweed. That good good cryptograss. Callin' up Mystic Jane for her special sorcery stash. Doing that Green Invocation.

Oh my god.

Burning that herb in the crystal ball. Rolling the occult joint the likes of which wizardkind had never seen. Runic reefer tended by the most spaced out spellcaster on the eastern seaboard. Smoking the kind of stuff that gives you illegal divinations, that wicked wicca-kush liable to make you live deliciously. Skunky six leafed plants watered with pure alchemy, you know what I mean.

That's not legal in very many states, still federally restricted. If you can live with the idea of being a narc you can report it through standard LEP Recon team channels.

...what?

[ecandjamesvpjournal]

Hey Mandy. I've been waiting for my coworker to arrive for like thirty minutes now, and he still hasn't shown up. This isn't like him, it's 7 am and he isn't answering my calls. I'm starting to think something is wrong.

Hey Mandy. I've been waiting for my coworker to arrive for like thirty minutes now, and he still hasn't shown up. This isn't like him, it's 9 am and he isn't answering my calls. I'm starting to think something is wrong.

Hey Mandy. I've been waiting for my coworker to arrive for like thirty minutes now, and he still hasn't shown up. This isn't like him, it's 12 pm and he isn't answering my calls. I'm starting to think something bad happened.

Hey Mandy. I've been waiting for my coworker to arrive for like thirty minutes now, and he still hasn't shown up. This isn't like him, it's 4 pm and he isn't answering my calls. I'm starting to think something bad happened.

Hey Mandy. I've been waiting for my coworker to arrive for like thirty minutes now, and he still hasn't shown up. This isn't like him, it's 9 pm and he isn't answering my calls. I'm starting to think something bad happened.

I'm starting to think something bad happened.

I'm starting to think something bad happened.

Uh, yeah, kinda seems like something bad happened there. ██████ up.

So, uh, twofold here, your coworker isn't showing up cuz you're in some kind of temporal anomaly. So, uh, that's bad. Did you mean to send a secret message begging for help with the way your text is colored, or is that just a weird coincidence? Because that's also bad. So, like I said earlier, you kind of have to go with the flow here, let the anomaly carry you where it's going to go, while moving to get out of it at an oblique angle? Apart from that, I think you probably missed your meeting, bud.

[ecandjamesvpjournal]

Hey Mandy:

I just walked into my living room and found all the walls and the floor covered with papers all with "DONT FORGET! DONT THINK! DONT LOOK!" Written on all of them. It looks like my handwriting but the writing is all different sizes and with different writing tools. marker, pen, pencil, I think one is even blood. Anyhow should I just recycle the papers or something? I can't think of any reason why they are here.

Well, that sounds like a sensible reaction to seeing dire warnings written in your own handwriting. Yeah, it's probably nothing to worry about.

This is a prank, right? It has to be a prank, like, no one could ignore warning signs that clear?

The human capacity for denial never ceases to impress me. Perception is reality, but if there's one thing I've learned, it's that we love to not see anything that could inconvenience us. Like the check engine light in our cars. Wait, you aren't supposed to ignore that?

Get out of the house. Get help. Good lord.

[ecandjamesvpjournal]

For Mandy:

There's some guy in my town who claims to be selling "moments of time". He has some kind of stall set up on the street, and there are things being displayed but I can't remember what they look like.

I'm pretty sure that selling bits of time would be impossible, and even if it isn't I don't think those are actual moments of time. I think he's probably just selling random objects with some kind of enchantment that makes you forget their appearance.

How can I check if it's fraud without buying his wares? I don't want to waste money trying to prove that he's a scam artist.

Time in a bottle, huh. He’s a regular Jim Croce.

…no? God. Remind me to bring in my vinyls. You kids are missing out.

Regardless of if these are real, it’s illegal to sell time like this. Time isn’t finite, per se, but unless you’re doing some pretty substantial chronological breakage you’d have to ‘borrow’ the time from somewhere else that wouldn’t notice it. Bottom of the ocean maybe.

I’m curious now whether he purported to sell specific moments or time, generally. It seems like specific moments now that I read it again, which - that’s just theft.

Avoid, warn, report. We’ll send someone down.

—hm hm, da da da, I’d save every day ‘til eternity passes away, just to spend them with you—

[ecandjamesvpjournal]

"The unit voted UNANIMOUSLY - with 100% participation - to authorize a strike if management does not reach a fair new contract before their current agreement expires this Friday, April 19."

[ecandjamesvpjournal]

Neo Miami-3 News

[ecandjamesvpjournal]

Hello Neil! I hope you're having a great day, just to ask, how can I get a copy of Good Omens signed by you?

Do I have to catch you first?

The Golden Notebook bookshop in Woodstock NY should have signed copies.

[ecandjamesvpjournal]

The Shepherd and O'demma notice something strange

[ecandjamesvpjournal]

when you and the mutual got wildly differing ocs but you wanna draw them together so bad anyways