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Learning how to manage my adhd symptoms without relying on anxiety has been so difficult even with medication actually but I think I’ve figured out that like. You’ve gotta let yourself be slow sometimes. Sprinting isn’t really a sustainable way to go through life.

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I think at least part of why western leftists are so horrified by Israel's closed borders is bc here in the US immigration is such a hot button issue. In the US, anti-immigration policies are by and large motivated by racism. So people see US politicians making it harder and harder for brown people to immigrate, harder and harder to get citizenship; they see Trump raging against the Mexicans ruining his country or whatever. So they fight tooth and nail against anti-immigration ideology. And then they see Israel putting restrictions on travel between Israel and Palestine and they think "this must be the same."

It's not the same though, for a whole host of reasons, but most notably because Mexico hasn't been actively bombing the US for the better part of a century

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I can even kind of understand that university systems that charge students exorbitant amounts of money for their degrees affect the general view of education and "the academy," but the extent to which people have just stopped believing in and valuing expertise is so scary. You cannot replace scientific training. I am "only" a literary scholar but any person with a lit studies background will tell you that it is a vastly different experience discussing literature (of any kind! my area of expertise is romance novels!) with another scholar versus at a random book club. And it's not bad to not be an expert! You are not an expert about the vast majority of stuff! But when somebody says "I have dedicated years of my life to the systematic study of this subject in conversation and exchange with other people who have done the same, and based on our combined knowledge we conclude that x," that needs to be taken more seriously than someone who has not gone through this process.

An academic degree is no different from, say, a medical license or even a driver's license in the sense that it functions as shorthand for "this person has undergone the necessary training and passed the necessary tests to certify that they possess the skills needed for this specific profession/task." That's it! And yes, there are many problems within academia (these days, the majority of lecturers and researchers are in precarious employment. ask me how I know) and a university degree is no guarantee that a person can't be spouting absolute nonsense. But its purpose is to facilitate the pursuit, expansion, and passing on of knowledge, which is really, really important and should not be devalued by claiming you don't need formal training to know stuff.

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Slowly realizing over time that NPD truly is built on dysregulation of self esteem and that everything seems to stem from 'what will people think of me'. It's not even selfish, it's just self absorbed. It's losing your view for others when all you can think about is how you can possibly be the best out of anyone around you. Its priding yourself on all that effort and feeling scorched by anyone's disapproval, criticism, etc. It turns into 'how dare they' because you and you alone know how much effort you've put into appearances, into having people like you, into being someone everyone wants and who they want to be.

I think people with NPD have been brainwashed into thinking it *is* selfish and to just accept it. So many narcs snicker at anger from so called 'narc abuse survivors' and 'empaths', the attention fuels a lot of us. But that's because any attention can be flipped and turned around into something good, unless its personal. Then its back to how dare they. But the little to no empathy isn't because we dont care, its because we care so much about how we will reflect to others that others problems fall out of mind. It's difficult to feel your feelings because theyre not my feelings. Why is it my problem when I can't do anything about it? But we tend to help anyway, for the praise of it all. The empathy also tends to shut off because a lot of us used to have too much of it. The brain is very good at keeping you healthy. Stress isnt healthy, so it gets rid of those stressers.

Believing you have a higher purpose, having dreams of fame and attention, craving praise and validation all the time, these are outcomes of a lack of attention growing up, not understanding others emotions, pressure being put on people, etc. NPD is not born from nothing and it does not make people evil. What makes people abusers are a lot of other factors. 'Then why do so many abusers have NPD'. Do they? Or did you just categorize abuse alongside the disorder and now you use that to diagnose it? Or maybe its also the fact you treat people with disorders like theyre vermin. As if they've already abused. Wouldn't that drive you crazy? To be called something your not? Yknow what that sounds like to me? 'Transgender people are predators, they force their sexuality onto everyone'. Let's compare. 'People with NPD are abusers, they only care about themselves'. Sounds like mistaking your own bias for fact. You only think those things because someone told you its true. Transgender people dont push their sexuality, people with NPD do not only care about themselves. Thanks for coming to my TedTalk.

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i dream of having a regulated nervous system

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Alright everyone, Jewish joy time

Share something Jewish that has brought you joy lately!

I had been using a challah recipe for a while and it worked fine, but it was always kind of dry, so the past few times I made it I experimented a bit with the amount of flour and sugar, and now the challah turns out super soft and fluffy!

I'm mostly excited about this because I've always been kind of scared to mess with baking recipes, especially bread recipes, so I'm just really glad it worked out well.

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Can you believe I'm having to make this meme even after successfully finishing up taxes and applying to job

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"slacker", 2021 and 2025, acrylic on canvas board

july is disability pride month! this piece is actually two pieces - the background was an assignment i received a failing grade on in sophomore year of high school, because my lines were not neat. my teacher told me i must have done a poor job on purpose, that i clearly didn't try, and told me this after i explained that i have hand tremors and definitely can't paint anything close to a perfectly straight line.

the canvas has sat at the bottom of a pile for a few years, face down with my embarrassment, while i put nearly everything else i make up on the walls. i still remember these words so clearly, the implication that it wasn't really that "nobody" at all's hands were shaky, but "nobody (who belongs here, in this art class, in art at all)"'s hands were. so, i decided to paint those words, and appreciate how wobbly the letters would be, even with my guidelines. that's how it is!

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DIY punk/alt/fashion tip: if you ever see a big-ass belt like this in a thrift shop, take it. Doesn't matter if it's not your style, doesn't fit you, if it's broken, or fake leather, doesn't matter. Just take it. Because you're gonna take that thing home and take it apart for the studs. The rest of it is irrelevant. Because I bought this belt for two euros.

...making this two euros' worth of studs.

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If someone is about to walk into a situation that could range anywhere from inconvenient to harmful for them, the courteous and fair thing to do is to give them a warning.

For example, you're using a public bathroom, and there's no toilet paper left for the toilet you're using. If someone was waiting outside and is about to use the toilet / stall you were just using, it's fair to warn them first "hey there's no toilet paper left in that one" so they can use a different toilet if they'd prefer (or maybe grab some paper towel from the sink first if they'd personally rather improvise like that).

Another example of this is in many places it's common for cars to flash their lights at oncoming cars if there's any sort of danger or obstacle in the road ahead, like a flooded road, or an accident, or rubble/debris in the road.

Or say you used to work somewhere, and the work environment was really toxic (verbally abusive boss, co-workers who are bullies, they repeatedly "accidentally" paid you less than they were supposed to even after you called them out on it, etc) and someone you know is going to apply working there or was just offered a job there, it's fair and considerate to warn them about your experiences.

Or maybe you took a class that was way harder than you thought it would be, and had a much higher rate of people who fail or drop the class than you anticipated, it would be fair to warn a friend and/or classmate who says they're going to take that class.

The point of giving warnings is that you can save someone else a lot of trouble. Even if they still decide to proceed, it's better for people to go into a situation prepared and knowing what they're getting into rather than being completely caught off guard. Even just knowing about something ahead of time can make a difference.

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like I'm sorry but I will keep posting about this until people stop being cunts and shitheads so I think we'll be here a good while. every time I talk about the colonial framing of australia and how colonialism is at work in modern day understandings of this country I only need to count to ten before every european and usamerican in sight starts spouting complete bullshit. why don't you all take a deep breath and examine why the fuck you're so wedded to the idea of australia you have in your head

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i hate when a piece of kids media is so well made that people start saying "clearly this was made FOR adults not for silly little babies. we are the true target demographic" like cmon man. you don't have to pretend it's something it isn't. sometimes things that are made for 12 year olds are good.

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"If you're going through hell, keep going. Why would you stop in hell?"

Hey fellow chronically ill people, tell me your favourite quotes/sayings! Like, the ones that are actually motivating, calming, or reassuring, not the bullshit like "the only thing that can stop me is a bad attitude"

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imagine cloth mother and wire mother in family court competing for custody of the baby monkey

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"everyone experiences [symptom]" how many times does it have to be explained that it's often about the frequency of the symptom, not the symptom itself