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September 27, 2023

“…the paradox that underscores all courage: that leaning into what is gripping us will allow us to work our way free.”  — Mark Nepo

Dearest Richard,

As I lean more into the family letters of your crew —looking at the timing, the details, the hope, the assumptions —the more I feel the gut wrenching struggle that was transpiring. Days are logged, moments linger, Easter arrives. The heartache. The unknown abyss that seemed just a single step away in the dark. Always in the dark. Finding links. Grabbing for straws. Running on an adrenaline that love keeps pushing forward. The importance of such communication at an incredibly tenuous time. Where are all of you? What has truly happened? 

April brings more specifics. This is what Jean Mullen writes (April 8, 1944, Chicago, Il):

“…and two of the boys have turned up as prisoners of Germany: Lt. Wm. Jeffries & S/Sgt. Chas. H. Leslie. So keep up your hopes, I know everyone of them are safe somewhere.” 

She continues including the next of kin addresses and whether you are prisoners of war or still listed as missing. So much to grapple with. She wants it to be okay for all of you—that is what is clearly felt. The persistence in alerting everyone with what she knows as swiftly as she can.

Getting pulled into another letter sent at about the same time but the other side of the coin. The POW coin. The family that mom would continue to have contact with after their airman returned home. The family that graciously allowed more questions to be asked. The family I would connect up with in 2015. 

Betty Jeffries writes this (Wednesday, April 12, 1944, Philadelphia, PA): 

“I know Ross [That’s you.] very well. I met him in Pocatello. Jeff and I were married there September 6th and I stayed with him until they left for Topeka, November 12th. Naturally I saw quite a bit of the fellows in those two months. 

“The night before they left, Ross told me that they would all see me soon and for me not to worry because they would come through alright. I really believed him.” 

Why did some come home but not everyone else? The question that is getting stuck in my head for I know how this part of the story ends. Why didn’t YOU get to come home too? If the letters could reveal all that was being felt, that screaming question would also have been there, for I can still hear it now. 

Sending you love as deep as the ocean,

Your Niece

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September 26, 2023

“All that we are is story. From the moment we are born to the time we continue on our spirit journey, we are involved in the creation of the story of our time here. It is what we arrive with. It is all we leave behind. We are not the things we accumulate. We are not the things we deem important. We are story. All of us. What comes to matter then is the creation of the best possible story we can while we’re here; you, me, us, together. When we can do that and we take the time to share those stories with each other, we get bigger inside, we see each other, we recognize our kinship— we change the world, one story at a time.” — Richard Wagamese (1955-2017), Ojibway author and journalist

Dearest Richard, 

Or should I address you as Dick or is it Ross? Different names I see you being identified as, as I tearfully read through the endearing and hopeful letters that your crew’s family members wrote to one another after news of your plane crashing. The families were trying to speak in detail about what they knew or understood. Adding optimistic injections when the specifics were missing. 

In April of 1944, more seemed to be known, prompting an uptick in correspondence. Seeing too the challenge of letter writing when addresses change. Grandpa and mom must have moved from the family home on Aldrich during your military service. The one you and all your siblings had grown up in and moved away from, except for mom.The house that stored the childhood memories she shared with me. 

The house that was just a hop, skip and jump from the Boulevard Theater. The one that showed the Shirley Temple matinees she loved to watch. Mom spoke of how you finagled free admittance to the movie house for her and your friends. Something about an open bathroom window. Hoisting the innocent through said window. I assume there was an accomplice inside. You didn’t handle this alone.

I am curious to know how you would tell the story. How did that actually work? You sounded resourceful with a smidge of illegal thrown in, got it. Understanding these hoists were happening during the depression when money was as scarce as diamonds. Always curious about the details. 

Mom loved any of your antics. I believe I would have too.

Until next write.

Love,

Your Niece 

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On My Mind-last straws

Resource: Letters from an American: June 30, 2025 by Heather Cox Richardson: Read, July 1, 2025 📰

Dear Mr. President, 

I am so done wondering how your ego fits through the Oval Office door. 

I am so done feeling shocked by your abhorrent actions and watching others follow you like mindless sheep to the slaughter. 

I am so done wondering how you sleep at night.

This week, another last straw continues to break the camel’s back. 

Sincerely, 

A disheartened American

This Week:

Nature 365: Steady Supply: Watch on repeat 🎥

On Being with Krista Tippett: Joanna Macy Hope Portal, Episode 5: Listen, June 26, 2025 🎙️

“For their first job, these teen brothers started a hot dog cart by Lincoln Roch, Star Tribune, Read , June 26, 2025 📰

“ If you could live an eternity and not change a thing or exist for the blink of an eye and alter everything, what would you choose?” ― The Freedom Writers Diary 📔

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On my mind: Art and Nature-a balm for the disheartened spirit

Full statement from Sophie and Colin Hortman by Star Tribune Staff, The Minnesota Star Tribune, Read, June 16, 2025 😢 (With heavy hearts.♥️) 

“The sky is not the limit—it’s just the view.”  — Giants Exhibit

Resources: Minneapolis Institute of Art (MIA) Alicia Keys and Swizz Beatz on tour in the art world Watch, April 2, 2025 🎨

Where the wild things are: St. Paul’s Raspberry Island by Alex V. Cipolle: Take a peek, May 31, 2025  🎨

This Week:

Nature 365: Around the Pond: Watch 🎥

The Onion calls out ‘cowardice’ of Congress in full-page NYT ad by Marisa Kabas, The Handbasket Read, June 22, 2025 📰

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On My Mind: unfathomable

Resource: Letters from an American: June 15, 2025 by Heather Cox Richardson: Read, June 16, 2025 📝

Ramble Write: What now do we do with the change this tragedy demands of us? Life goes on. The clock continues to tick. Moments can alight or dismiss with more intensity. The collective impact. Staying with the uncomfortable and not the oft “hot potato” blame game. Pushing our discomfort off on to someone or something else. Being present with what is transpiring. Pulling kindness on to the scene more intentionally. Violence snaps us to attention. 

What will you and I do with this tragedy? The one in my backyard yet now known around the world. We all need to do better without pulling others down in the process. +++ 

This Week: 

Watching: My Girl Trailer (1991), Nature 365: Nature Minnesota style 🐦

Reading: Life is in the Transitions: Mastering Change at any Age by Bruce Feiler

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On My Mind-STOP

Dear Mr. President,

Just STOP!!!

Sincerely,

A disheartened American 

Watching this week:

Freedom Writers (2007) trailer: Watch 🎥 TEDX Conejo- The Freedom Writers: Erin Gruwell: Watch 🎥

Journey to American Democracy: “Ten Steps to Revolution” created by Heather Cox Richardson:  Watch Telling the history in brief video steps. 🎥 Resource: Letters from an American: June 7, 2025 by Heather Cox Richardson: Read, June 8, 2025

Nature 365: Lightning Watch , June 11, 2025 🎥

Resource: Letters from an American: June 10, 2025: Read , June 11, 2025

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June 6, 1944

November 15, 2023

“In our sleep, pain, which cannot forget, falls drop by drop onto the heart, until, in our own despair, against our will comes wisdom through the awful grace of God.”— Aeschylus

Dearest Richard,

Looking at the next crew member family letter in the queue. This one being typed out on what would have been your twenty fifth birthday— June 6th, 1944. My guess is another candle would have been added on to your cake. Your family would have been honoring the day in some way, acknowledging it was your birthday. I don’t rightly know, but that is what I would presume. Thinking of you with a deepening of thought. Watching time pass and yet the unanswered questions still standing in place. 

Little did they realize that twenty-four years would be all that you would get. But while hope is still afloat, anything remains possible. At least for another half a year or so. Letting go in bits and pieces along the way. Knowing that truth was eventually needing to take hold and remain. But that time of limbo. The many “maybes" of possibilities being wished upon a star each night before sleep would arrive. Maybe you are in hiding in some farmer’s barn. Maybe you are with the Resistance. Maybe…maybe and some more maybes added for good measure. Trying to imagine the potential unexpected or unexplainable happenings that might have occurred. A happy ending would undoubtedly be the outcome. It just had to be. That is what I would have hoped for and that would have been the same for mom as well. 

June 6th 1944 was also D-day. The first day of Operation Overload. An onslaught of American soldiers would have been landing on Omaha and Utah Beach in Normandy that morning. Higgin boats would be riding low and rocking against the waves before hitting shore, ready to launch soldiers on to the German fortified beach post haste. Fighter planes would have been flying overhead. Paratroopers would have been jumping out of C-47’s. It was a significant shift in the war campaign for the Allies. 

Robert would not have known any of this. His story would have been more close to home and hooked to the one he most preciously knew, his baby brother. Correspondence was finally arriving from Charles. Not having received any word for over six months since the Powder Ann went down. Bettie had received a letter from Jeffries dated Christmas Day 1943. Was that a difference in treatment of POW officers versus POW enlisted airmen? Was it a difference between Stalag Luft I and Stalag 17B? What an excruciating wait. Robert would still be experiencing the fresh grief of his mom having unexpectedly passed that previous October. A lot to hold on to there, Robert. 

It would be his last letter. Or at least the last letter saved. Thinking about all the challenges the different crew family members must have been navigating during this tenuous time of so much unknown. 

Learning more each write.

Love, 

Your Niece ❤️

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On My Mind- the dodo bird

Dear Mr. President, 

I thought the dodo bird was extinct. 

Sincerely, 

A disheartened American

This Week:

Caught my eye: In Marseille, a shadow becomes art in Banksy’s latest street mural by Thomas Adamson, Bishr Elton, Jill Lawless, AP News: Take a peek, May 30, 2025 👀

Got me thinking: Hardwiring Happiness by Dr. Rick Hanson TEDX Marin: Check out, 2013 🎥

Sunday afternoon adventure destination:

On my reading shelf: How We Learn to be Brave by Mariann Edgar Budde  📙

New Word: Lifequake: noun. a major life change, from internal or external disruption, that precipitates personal evolution or rebirth.

Quote:

Resource: Letters from an American: May 31, 2025 by Heather Cox Richardson: Read , June 1, 2025 ✉️

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On My Mind- Truth

Liar, liar 

pants on fire --

nose as long as

a telephone wire. 

Dear Mr. President, 

Losing the truth means losing yourself. Why would that be your go to choice? 

Telling the story you want told not the honest one. Trying to fabricate it from the very beginning. Creating a distortion where actions pull us all off our game. Seems to be something you don’t want to accept or change or even admit. Finding that the struggle for sense will be hard to find. 

Not certain what pulls in this pattern of distrust for the truth and the need to shape your own story. It doesn’t matter how many videos or audio recordings of what authentically happened are played. Your “truth” is the truth you choose to stick with. It makes sense in your head and you are going to stay with it. 

That is what I am trying to understand more clearly. For when “this is the truth” bumps up against “the story you want to be the truth,” which is going to win? How do you lose sight of what has honestly just transpired? Holding so tightly on to the reins. The here is the now of the WHAT? The sense of the nonsense. 

Is holding truth in place just too darn hard?

Your homework assignment for this week: read On Tyranny by Timothy Snyder

Here is an excerpt to get you started. (Chapter 10): …truth dies in four modes.

1. Open hostility to verifiable reality: This involves actively denying or dismissing factual evidence and presenting false information as truth. “Then came the Big Lie about an election, creating a fictional counter world.” 

2. Shamanistic incantation: This refers to the use of repetitive slogans, propaganda, and carefully crafted language to create a sense of shared belief and acceptance of falsehoods. “…endless repetition.” “The Big Lie created its own world, where anyone who pointed to simple truths was the enemy.” 

3. Magical thinking: This is the embrace of contradictory ideas and a blatant disregard for logic or reason. “Accepting untruth of this radical kind requires a blatant abandonment of reason.” 

4. Misplaced faith: This involves placing unwavering trust in a leader or ideology, regardless of evidence or reason. “Once truth had become oracular rather than factual, evidence was irrelevant.” 

“You submit to tyranny when you renounce the difference between what you want to hear and what is actually the case.” 

Without truth, you are dead in the water. What you seek will never be obtained no matter how many bitcoins you cram in to your pockets or heads you step on to get the controlled power you demand. Love can’t find you. Kindness can’t be felt. The softening of humility will never transpire. You will be lost — forever. A very sad tale to tell, Mr. P., but it's true.

Sincerely,

A disheartened American

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Memorial Day 2025

This time last year: Journal Entry: Heading to Alaska 

May 24, 2024 (A.M.): (Saw: cormorants, eagles, trumpeters, deer carcass-a lot, pelicans, osprey). On the move and on our way. What caught my eye? What drew me in as the miles rolled under the wheels? What will be held onto and kept? Alaska or Bust. The next morning in reflection of what “Day 1—Alaska” offered.

We were off and on our way by 7:01 A.M. Heading north on 94 and taking that the majority of the way. Dickinson was the destination for day one. Hit the mountain time change after passing the continental divide. Arriving mid-afternoon. The wind was pushing us west a good part of the way after arriving in North Dakota. 

The day was bright and cool along the way with some showers that kindly removed the bugs on the windshield. Made an “Alaska or Bust” paper sign to attach on to the rear window. Remembering doing that on our 2003 Alaska trip. The masking tape is yet to be cooperative in keeping it in place but I will whip it into shape. Trying to navigate the riding in the car rhythm. The distance seemed just right for day one. Rolling along, seeing North Dakota in springtime. Lilacs in bloom along the freeway. The trees are lush and green. The ponds are full and some even pushing along white caps. August, our typical drive through month painted a dryer picture and more sunflowers in full bloom, ready to be plucked. The wind met us every time we stopped. 

Got a phone call from #1 Son while on the road. Finishing the MPR project about Richard he and I were able to do for Memorial Day. Checking in on some last minute details. He was wondering if Richard, his great uncle, had purposefully enlisted in the Air Corps. Did he have interest in planes as a kid? A question I had asked and speculated on while writing his story. The story I have called B-24, Forever. Making more assumptions than absolutes. Thinking of the development of the plane as he was growing up. Barnstormers— did they ever come to town? Charles Lindbergh flying non-stop across the Atlantic as Richard was about to turn eight. The questions—unanswered. I tell him about the photo of Richard holding onto a balsam wood airplane that is the lead image on the youtube video I did called Bring Him Home. Just as we arrive at our Dickinson Hotel #1 Son lets me know that my audio piece will air on MPR’s All Things Considered at 3:50 CST and 5:20 CST. When that message arrives we are close to the 3:50 time. As spouse checks us in I earplug the MPR link #1 Son has sent ( The MPR Story  ) and listen for its imminent arrival. We both get to hear it and when we retrieve our take out supper at Blue 42 Grille, we stopped, pulling off to the side of the road and listened to it again. Sweet deal. Thanks to #1 Son's efforts, there it arrived. 

Swam in the perfect temperature, uncrowded pool. Lapped swam myself while reflecting on the day. Outside the wind still whipping while rain joined in. Watched “61 Asterisk” with one eye open. +++

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On My Mind- George Perry Floyd Jr.

Nature 365 “Discovery Lake”: Watch, 5.21.25  🎥

Out and About: Residual from this past fall’s visit to Route 66, perhaps. Adore those classic cars. Favorites this round. Begging to be pegged together. Same car. Same birthday. Same parents. Names that rhyme. Born same year as the car. What’s not to love? +++

Five years later—

George Floyd’s daughter, now 11, on life without her dad: ‘It’s hard’ by Myron Medcalf, The Minnesota Star Tribune: Read, May 20, 2025 📰

MPR News journalists reflect on George Floyd‘s murder and the uprising that followed by Emily Reese and Gretchen Brown: Read and listen, May 23, 2025 📰🎙️

MPR News: Siblings reflect on 5 years of serving George Floyd Square and south Minneapolis by Feven Gerezgiher: Read and listen, May 22, 2025 📰 🎙️

Related blog entries: 

Hometown Firestorm: The Death of George Floyd: Read, June 4, 2020 🍇🥤🍫

We are all alike within our differences: Read , June 11, 2020 🍇🥤🍫 

Daddy Changed the World: Read , April 22, 2021, 🍇🥤🍫 

Thoughts that link: Time Collateral Beauty- Letters to Love, Time, Death Featurette:  Watch , December 15, 2016 🎥

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On My Mind- Snake in the slough

Mother’s Day walk in the Big Woods. Sweet grandbaby’s first visit. Greeted by some new additions from the week before— wild ginger, trillium, Canadian lousewort, wild blue phlox. Love the hunt. 

Dear Mr. President, 

This week’s question: 

Kristen Welker (NBC): “Don’t you need to uphold the Constitution of the United States, as president?” 

You: “I don’t know.” 

Senator Rand Paul (R-KY): “Following the Constitution is not a suggestion. It is a guiding force for all of us who work on behalf of the American people. Do you agree?“ 

Mr. P?     

Resource: Letters from an American May 12, 2025 by Heather Cox Richardson, May 13, 2025 📝

Sincerely, 

A disheartened American 

P.S. Thinking of you. Nature365: Surveillance: Watch (to the end), May 8, 2025 🦆🦆

This Week: 

“My job is to make sure that I take care of my square, that I change my square, and that my square changes their squares.” — Jason Reynolds

“We need to sit with the fact that we are all interrelated and we affect each other.” — Kessley Janvier

Resource: On Being podcast with Jason Reynolds and Kessley Janvier: Listen, May 8, 2025 🎙️

“What I worry about is that when problems are not addressed, people will not know who is responsible. And when the problems get bad enough ... some one person will come forward and say, ‘Give me total power and I will solve this problem.’ That is how the Roman republic fell,” — Justice David Souter (2012 interview)

Resource: Former Supreme Court Justice David Souter, a Republican who became a liberal favorite, dies at 85 APNews by Mark Sherman, Read, May 9, 2025  📰

Down the Mine: Original 1983 pilot fully restored Thomas and Friends: Watch 🚂

Resource: Rediscovered Thomas and friends pilot episode to be released: Read, May 9, 2025

Woodcock dances to Stayin’ Alive: Watch (just cuz’) 🐦‍⬛

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On My Mind: Vietnam War - 50 years later

Strolling through the Big Woods just last Sunday afternoon and what did I spy, my camera phone and I?

Dear Mr. President, 

Your homework for this week:

“Don’t make people excessively fearful. 

Don’t make fun of people. Don’t look down on them. 

Don’t tell people about threats, and then leave them hanging without a sense of what can be done. 

Don’t flatten people into stereotypes. 

Make people curious. Feed humility. Help them see that there are things that don’t fit their narratives, both about themselves and about others. 

Show the humanity, the complexity in others, especially in the other. 

Be radically helpful, show you care by being helpful. 

Show people that you have their backs. 

Don’t overwhelm people with too much information they can’t take in or do anything about; it’s unkind. 

Listen deeply and respectfully; stop condescending. 

Don’t make people look foolish. 

Don’t only come around when you want to show what’s wrong with a place.” — David Bornstein

Resource: On Being podcast “On our Lives with News” — David Bornstein: Listen , May 1, 2025 🎙️

Sincerely, 

A disheartened American 

Watching: Vietnam War 50 Years Later: Reflections on a war that changed Minnesota: Watch, April 2025 🎥

Lost at Sea: Vietnamese family reunites with the men who rescued them Watch, March 10, 2018 🎥

Related blog entry: Left at the Wall: Read, July 27, 2023 🍇🥤🍫

A place to explore: Where to find Minnesota’s only salt lake It attracts huge flocks of migrating birds — and birders — this time of year by Alex Chhith, The Minnesota Star Tribune, April 30, 2025: Read 📰

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On My Mind: 100 days and counting while thinking

Nature365: Eagle owl: Watch , April 27, 2025 🦉

Starling murmuration: Watch  (Super cool) 🐦‍⬛

Match up: Art and Flowers — What more can be seen? Which art piece goes with which floral arrangement? What do you think?

Dear Mr. President, 

100 days, huh. So how many days yet remain? Finding nature and history continues to ground me to the floor I continue to pace along, for sense is a struggle to be found. From your renaming of Denali, it has simply gone down hill from there. 

Sincerely,

A disheartened American 

Related blog entry: On My Mind: History remembers —everything: Read, January 23, 2025 🍇🥤🍫

This week: 

Reading: Birding to Change the World by Trish O’Kane 📗

Listening: St. Philip the Deacon Faith and Life Series Talk by David Brooks: Listen, April 24, 2025🎙️

Thinking: “You can go to live in France, but you cannot become a Frenchman. You can go to live in Germany or Turkey or Japan, but you cannot become a German, a Turk, or a Japanese. But anyone, from any corner of the Earth, can come to live in America and become an American.

“We lead the world because, unique among nations, we draw our people—our strength—from every country and every corner of the world. And by doing so we continuously renew and enrich our nation. While other countries cling to the stale past, here in America we breathe life into dreams. We create the future, and the world follows us into tomorrow. 

“Thanks to each wave of new arrivals to this land of opportunity, we're a nation forever young, forever bursting with energy and new ideas, and always on the cutting edge, always leading the world to the next frontier. This quality is vital to our future as a nation. If we ever closed the door to new Americans, our leadership in the world would soon be lost.” — Ronald Reagan [Remarks at the Presentation Ceremony for the Presidential Medal of Freedom,” January 19, 1989]

Resource: Letters from an American “April 26, 2025” by Heather Cox Richardson: Read 📝

Learning: AP News: Secret note hidden in Dachau-built ‘Violin of Hope’ tells a tale of survival and craftsmanship by Justine Spike: Read, April 28, 2025 📰

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On My Mind-- Pope Francis

Related blog entry: Reflections on Holy Week Read, April 12, 2018 🍇🥤🍫

This Week: 

Reading: Awe by Dacher Keltner; On Tyranny by Timothy Snyder 📗📕

Watching: Hallmark’s Loving Leah Trailer (2009) 🎥; “Everything” by Michael Bublé: Watch (2007)  🎶

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On My Mind--collaged thinking

“There are only two ways to live your life.

One is as though nothing is a miracle.

The other is as though everything is a miracle.”   

― Albert Einstein

Resource: Letters from an American “April 13, 2025” by Heather Cox Richardson: Read, April 14, 2025 📝

This Week: 

Reading: Where Rivers Part by Kao Kalia Yang 📗

Watching: The Secret: Dare to Dream Trailer (2020) 🎥

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On My Mind: She would love...

Nature 365 “On to the Arctic”: Watch  🎥 (Jim Brandenburg November 23, 1945 — April 4, 2025) 

Missing her — so I biked to pay her a visit this morning. Eighteen years and the love still holds —stronger than ever. 

She would love to be a great grandma.

She would love to watch thousands upon thousands of snow geese in flight.

She would love to hear the rain on the roof and watch the lightening as it lights up the sky.

She would love to hear a loon’s mournful cry while walking the lake near our family home.

She would love the day in its everyday dazzle and shine.

Much ❤️ to you, mom,

Your middle daughter 

Love Bells Chime: A Daughter Reflects: Watch 🎥 (2016)

Thoughts in response: Grief is rarely given room to breathe. The timer is always ticking. “Get done with mourning because I can’t deal with your pain.“ That is what my mom’s death has taught me. +++